Chapter twenty-three: Unthinkable

The following morning,

Kate groans as Mary helps her get dressed. "I'm sorry about this."

"Don't be." Mary shakes her head. Kate had called her up to help her bind her ribs, but Mary had insisted on staying to help her get dressed. "I can't think of a woman more courageous or stupid than you."

"I agree, but I'd probably do it again." Kate laughs lightly, wincing as her eye throbs in pain. She had a black eye this morning and a cracked rib. She was glad she didn't sustain more damage than that. She groans as she steps into the day dress Mary handed her. It wasn't until Mary had buttoned up the back of her dress that she realized it wasn't black.

She tilted her head to the side, admiring the olive-green color. "Something wrong, Kate?"

"A little." She explained. "I'm supposed to be in mourning."

"Oh," Mary nods. "you're right. I'll just-

"No, it's alright. After all, of that drama of these last few weeks, I'm ready to shed the blackness. Besides, after what I did yesterday, I feel like I'd earn the right to wear a color."

"Indeed." Mary nods. "Not to mention this color is drawing attention to your good eye. Never noticed they were so piercing a shade of green before."

"Thank you Mary." Kate exhales. "I'm going to go check on Charlie before eating."

"The boy, is fine." Mary assures her as Kate goes to exit the room. "They're looking for a new nanny. Maybe Mr. Shelby will give the job to you?"

Kate shudders, remembering the fate of the last nanny. "And, our nanny, what's happened to her?"

"Ah, Mrs. Gray arranged to have her buried properly." She shakes her head. "that was a brave thing you did, getting into their car after they shot the nanny. They could have so easily shot you."

"I know, but," Kate opens the door to the nursery to see Charlie playing with his toys. "I was willing to take the chance."

"Would you like me to bring your breakfast up here?" Mary offers. "You look exhausted."

"Thank you, breakfast up here would be lovely, that's very kind of you to offer." Kate moves towards the rocking chair in the corner. "And truth to be told, I don't feel like walking down those stairs right now."

"With that rib, you should be in bed for at least a week, in my opinion. But you're a stubborn one." Mary smiles at her. "I'll have cook make up your favorite."

"Thank you." Kate winces as she sits down in the chair. Charlie smiles and waves at her before turning back to his toy horse. She smiles at him. "Hello, how are you today?"

"Good." he gurgles.

At the sound of footsteps, Kate glances towards the hallway. She knows that footfall. She stands up just as Thomas bursts into the room. "He's alright." she assures him as he makes a beeline for Charlie.

Kate smiles for a moment, watching as Thomas picks up Charlie and holds him close. He exhales in relief and Kate watches as two years of worry come off his face. Tears prickle her eyes and Kate feels as if she's intruding. She very carefully made her way out of the nursery and down the hall towards the sitting room, holding onto her rib carefully. Damn, she needed to know who she was in this household.

"Oi," she turns back to see Thomas Shelby striding towards her. "where the f**k do you think you're going? Come here." he exhales as he waves her towards him. She walks towards him. He pulls her into a hug, his grip tight and firm, surprising her for a moment. She closes her eyes and holds onto him. Truth to be told, she'd needed a hug like this for a while. A hug that made her feel safe and secure. "Thank you."

"Nobody touched him." she assures him quietly. "I made sure of that."

"I can't believe you f**king did that." he exhales. "You got into a car with armed men, after they shot the nanny, just to keep an eye on my boy."

"And I heard you got into a tunnel, you're a very strong man Thomas Shelby." she exhales as she places her hands on his shoulders. "Having been with you in the hospital, I know how difficult that was for you. I cannot thank you enough and, I'm sorry if you suffer any repercussions afterwards."

"Don't worry about that. They had you and my son, I had to find you." he exhales again as he hugs her one more time. Kate lets out a faint whimper in pain, as his grip is firm on her. He pulls away. "Did I hurt you?"

"I'm alright, just, a little delicate."

"She's lying Mr. Shelby." They spin around to see Mary coming up with a tray of food. "A man kicked her, while trying to take Charlie from her." Kate blushes as Thomas looks back at her. "She has a cracked rib, several bruises and as you can see, the makeup isn't quite covering up the black eye and other marks on her face." Mary bobs her head at Kate. "You food will be waiting for you in the nursery."

"Thank you."

"Thank you Mary." Thomas looks at her, his eyes narrowing at the sight of her black eye. "He did that to you as well?"

"It's alright." he touches underneath her eye gently, causing her to hiss. "That man is dead, no need to go looking for him."

"Who killed him?"

"Luca Changretta shot him."

Those words cause those blue eyes to narrow. "Why would he do that?"

She holds his gaze, even though it's uncomfortable. "Once upon a very long time ago, he was in love with me and wanted to marry me."

His brow arches. "Really? What happened?"

"My husband happened." She smiles faintly. "I should have thought that was obvious."

"Right." He shakes his head. "Anything ever happen between you and Alfie Solomons?"

"No. why?" she gasps. "Was he involved in this?"

"Partly, he had no idea about them involving Charlie. Alfie spilled everything he knew once he found out they'd taken you."

"Alfie was a dear childhood friend of mine, always was." she exhales. "I'm so disappointed in him. He promised me no harm would ever come to you by his hand."

"Kate, its business, things happen. If he's to be taken at his word, he had no knowledge about Charlie being dragged into this." He exhales. "Look, I've got to go and take care of some biasness."

"Right." She starts to walk, then she remembers Luca's words. "Oh, before I forget, Thomas." he turns towards her. "As I said, Luca rescued me, but I think I should warn you."

"About what?"

"Luca said," she bit her lip. "God, this is ridiculous, that he would see me later." Thomas's eyes narrow. "And, even though he helped me escape... let's just say that he made it very clear to me that he views you as a threat."

"Good. I am one."

"Not in that way Thomas." she inhales. "He thinks of you as a rival in regards to where my affections lie." He looks confused for a moment. "He thinks that there's something going on between the two of us."

"Why the hell would he think that?"

"He's a man. How would I know what goes on in a man's mind? But he's suggested that these rumors have been circulating for weeks."

"And this concerns him why?"

"Because in spite of me killing his mother, I get the distinct feeling that he still wants me to marry him." Thomas's face freezes for a moment, his blue eyes fixing her with a penetrating stare. "I only bring this up because…I don't to be the source of anymore complications. And since I've no idea what your business plans are in the future…I want you to promise me that if my presence here starts to cause any friction, let me know and I'll take a trip somewhere, for as long as needed."

"Do you want to be with him?" he demands, his voice pinning her in place for a moment. "I'll not hold you here if you want to be with Changretta."

This was her chance, she didn't have to go to Luca, and this was now her chance to be free. However, after all those months of being with the family, she'd come to have a special bond with the family, even the household staff. Moreover, to leave them, permanently, to be with a man like Changretta, it was unthinkable.

She shakes her head. "No, you're not holding me here."

"If you-

"I don't want to be with him," she says firmly and honestly. "I never loved him. I like it here with you and your family." She bites her lip before adding. "I haven't had as a close a relationship with my family as I have with yours and, I don't want to leave this atmosphere."

"Good." with that, he hurries down the stairs and out the front door. "Because when I get back, you'll be present for the first family meeting."

Kate blinked in surprise, standing there as if frozen. She was to be present for the sacred family meeting? Why was she to be allowed in the family meeting? Unless….she was to become family.

Kate shook her head. No. these feelings were odd and strange; they made her heart pound in anticipation. However, she'd no more finished grieving for her husband than Thomas had finished grieving for his wife. Love wasn't in the cards for either of them.

Even if her heart was telling her that just once, she might be wrong. Kate glances down the stairs, and Grace's portrait, seems to be calling to her. She exhales as she studies Grace's face very carefully. Grace had asked them to take care of each other. She'd never asked them to fall in love with each other. Besides, how could they ever have a chance?

Thomas was semi-responsible for her husband's death and she was semi=responsible for the death of his wife.

No, it would be a match made in hell. And no matter how her heart was telling her that there was a possibility, that they could be a match made totally in the opposite of hell. Her heart hadn't healed enough to surrender, as much as she wanted to let the past go. Time hadn't healed everything completely for her, but...that day would be soon.

Asuivre: She's figuring it out, now we have to wait for Thomas to figure it out!

MeriemDjez: I know, her and Luca…it could be interesting. Her father is awful in this one.

Idcam: I know, I know, everyone's chomping at for those two to get together, but….(I sent you PM.)