'Cause now that they're gone, all I hear are the words that I needed to say when you hurt under the surface, like troubled water running cold. Well, time can heal but this won't. So, before you go, was there something I could've said to make your heart beat better? If only I'd have known you had a storm to weather. So, before you go, was there something I could've said to make it all stop hurting? It kills me how your mind can make you feel so worthless. -Lewis Capaldi
At least a week had gone by since Deku had spoken with Uraraka in the lobby that day. He had assumed, naturally, that things would go back to normal. At least it should have gone that way on her end. His feelings wouldn't just vanish overnight and he knew it. But he certainly expected her to be her usual peppy self.
His assumption had been a very wrong one. Lately she seemed...sad. Circles under her eyes indicated she wasn't sleeping well. She always looked ready to cry at the drop of a hat. She wasn't avoiding him like before, but neither was she going out of her way to speak to him like he'd expected.
Today he gathered up his courage and finally approached her passing in the hallway at the office. "Hey, Uraraka. Wanna eat lunch with me today?" Goodness, she just looked so sad and he didn't understand why. He just wanted her to be okay.
His brows knit together in concern as she continued past him, seeming so distracted that she hadn't even noticed him let alone heard his question. He reached out a hand, resting it on her shoulder to get her attention. "Hey...sorry!" he apologized, immediately retracting his hand when she jumped. "You just seem distracted. Are you okay?"
"What? Oh...yeah, I'm okay," she said, though her facial expression and tone indicated she was anything but.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes," she said again, but one look at his face was enough to tell her he wasn't convinced. "No…" she admitted with a sigh.
They stood quietly in the otherwise empty hallway for several moments while he waited to see if she would elaborate and when she didn't, he spoke again, "Look...I know it's not my place to ask, but I do hope you know I'm here if you need to talk," he said, figuring it probably had something to do with anxiety over the fact that Sato still hadn't been caught.
One corner of her mouth twitched upward just slightly. "I know. It's just...I've just got a lot going on right now and I wouldn't even know where to start."
"Well...how about we go grab some lunch? We can talk if you want to but we don't have to if you'd rather not talk about it."
She hesitated a moment, considering the offer. She hadn't really talked to anyone about what had happened. All of her attempts to talk to Bakugo had been met with stony silence, but since Deku had been sort of inadvertently involved, it did make sense. And maybe it would help to get it all off her chest? "Sure, that sounds good."
"Okay, great. Let me just get my things from my desk and we can go." He said with a friendly smile.
Bakugo's eyes flicked up from his paperwork at his desk when they re-entered the room containing their cubicles. He watched them walk, side-by-side, and fought the urge to blow up Deku's face. He clenched his jaw in frustration. What did it really matter if they were still hanging out? Or seeing each other? Why should he be angry or surprised?
He still loved her. But he also couldn't stand the sight of her. He went back to his work, no longer looking at either of them.
Deku and Uraraka left the agency and travelled down to a small downtown deli. Deku swore by the sandwiches here, so it seemed worth a shot.
Once they had placed their orders and found a seat, he looked over at her with concerned eyes. "So...what's been going on?"
Ochako hesitated, absentmindedly tearing at the edges of a napkin while considering just how much of what had happened she should tell him. "Well...I guess the easiest way to put it would be that I'm going through a pretty bad breakup."
"Oh? I..uh..I hadn't even realized you were dating someone." Now her recent behavior made a lot more sense to him, though. He didn't know what had happened this time, but from the stories he'd heard about past exes, she sure did know how to pick them.
"It wasn't common knowledge," she explained, her eyes drifting down to the now completely frayed napkin in her hands. A sigh escaped her lips. "And I guess that was part of the problem, but it was nice not having everything in the public spotlight getting dragged through the tabloids like most pro hero relationships."
"Oh, it's another pro hero?" Deku said, blinking. "Would I know them or are they from another Alma Mater?" He paused, realizing this was very nosy of him to ask. "B-but if you'd rather not say who, I don't blame you! You don't have to!"
"No...it's okay...just...please don't say anything to anyone, okay?" She looked up at him and he nodded his agreement to her terms so she continued on, "Bakugo and I started seeing each other after the Magome mission, but it had been a long time coming before that. And things were great. Really great. But then I screwed up."
Deku had been taking a drink of the glass of water that had been brought to them upon sitting down, but at her revelation the water seemed to catch in his throat and he forced it down, followed by coughing. "You were—" he tried to stop coughing, but the shock was too deep, "Dating Kacchan?!"
It certainly explained a lot, now that he knew. But he just couldn't believe it. Kacchan was so loud and aggressive, meanwhile Uraraka was kind and composed most of the time. They weren't a couple that he would have ever seen coming.
Then he realized that this relationship had gone south, and her sadness seemed even worse now that he knew who was connected to it. His throat was still burning a little from choking on his water, but he managed to compose himself. "Sorry, I just had no idea. Um. Do you want to talk about what happened?"
"Not really," she answered honestly, "but I should. And it does sort of involve you." She sighed, eyes casting around for something to look at while she spoke to keep herself from crying. They settled on the window across from their table where she could see the faint outlines of people walking by on the sidewalk. "We broke up the day you and I talked outside of the locker rooms. I..umm...well, I hadn't told him about our previous conversation because I know you two have a rocky history and I just didn't want to contribute to that. But he overheard us talking that day." she paused, her breathing a bit unsteady as she recalled their conversation at her apartment afterward. "He...he said he couldn't trust me anymore because I kept it from him even though I tried to explain. Then he asked me to say that I loved him and I wanted to say it. Because I do love him...but for some reason, I just couldn't.."
She hadn't meant to say as much as she had, but once she started talking, the words just kept coming out. She dropped her face into her hands, her palms pressing against her eyes as her shoulders started to shake. "Why couldn't I just say it?"
Their food had arrived while she talked, but hers sat untouched as she sniffled and tried to get her emotions back in check.
Deku frowned at her. Now that he thought about it, Kacchan had been a little touchier lately than normal towards him, too. Then he scowled. How could he not see? Kacchan was an idiot!
He reached his hand out across the small table to touch her elbow gently. "Uraraka, I'm sorry. I don't know why it was so hard for you to say it, but I know Kacchan. When his pride is hurt, it's the biggest wound you can deal to a person like him. He judges others by their actions, he always has. And if there's one thing I know for certain about him, he's stubborn. More stubborn than any human should honestly be capable of being. But, I think if you can give it time, and keep trying to show him how you feel, maybe he will break down and finally listen. And maybe by then, you'll be ready to say the words aloud."
"I really don't think he's going to come around this time. I've tried to talk to him but he won't even look at me," she sighed, swiping her thumbs under her eyes to brush away the tears that had managed to escape. "I'm sorry. I thought I could talk about it without getting emotional but obviously I was wrong."
He shrugged. Was it easy for him to have this conversation with her? No. But they'd been friends first, so even if she loved another guy, and that guy happened to be Kacchan, he still wanted her to be happy. And it wasn't going to be with him. "It's completely okay. I'm sorry that I had anything to do with it, albeit unintentionally. Just hang in there."
Another week passed before the door to Todoroki's office was once again thrown open without warning, slamming back into the wall behind it.
He didn't look up. He didn't have to.
"Have a seat, Bakugo," he said, eyes never leaving the file in front of him.
Bakugo let out a disgruntled sound. "I'll stand." He crossed his arms and stood behind the chair before Todoroki's desk.
Todoroki shrugged, finally glancing up. "Have it your way, then. I'm sure you can guess why I've asked you to come this morning."
"No, actually. This had better not be a waste of my time. I've got paperwork to do." Bakugo growled out in response.
"You really have no idea?" Todoroki raised a brow, then shuffled through the papers on his desk, pulling one to the top of the stack. "I've had several complaints from your teammates about your recent attitude. While we both know you've never exactly been pleasant to deal with, I hear it's gotten significantly worse in recent weeks. Iida objects to the amount of noise you've been making," he glanced down at the paper, "'angrily sharpening pencils, unnecessary banging on keyboard, and muttering to yourself' while Sakura says you called her a...what was it…" he looked to the paper once more, "'a fucking shitty tornado.' Care to explain?"
"What? She's completely useless! I may as well be patrolling on my own for all the good she does. And Sonic can get the fuck over it-I'm not sharpening my fucking pencils angrily! How can someone even do that?" Bakugo yelled, clenching his fists.
Todoroki shrugged. "I was hoping you could tell me. Regardless, those are only two of many complaints I've received and even I have noticed you're even more unbearable than usual lately. I've tried to give it some time to resolve itself since I know why you're acting out, but the incident on 2nd street yesterday was taking it too far." He passed a different paper across the desk to Bakugo, outlining a list of damages they were being billed for after Bakugo had nearly demolished a building apprehending a minor thug.
Bakugo snatched the paper from him and scrolled over it with a snarl. "This is bogus, Icy Hot. He was getting away and that fucking shitty tornado wasn't helping much!" He tossed the paper onto the desk. "I had to take control of the situation. Not my fault their building structure was whack."
"I find it hard to believe you needed to use your quirk so excessively against someone whose quirk is just to make plants grow."
Bakugo hesitated. "You weren't there, so how could you possibly know how dangerous he was? You should be thanking me! Those plants were...EVERYWHERE!" He was getting more irritated as the conversation continued. "What're you gonna do, fire me? Send me home?"
"Actually, I thought I'd challenge you to a sparring match. I win, you start trying to act like a decent human being again."
Bakugo smirked. "If I win?"
"You won't." Todoroki stood. "I'll see you in the training room in five minutes."
"HAH! I do believe that's the funniest joke you've ever attempted, Half-and-Half!" Bakugo turned to exit the office in order to go grab his gauntlets. "Prepare to die!"
It didn't take Bakugo long to grab his gear and leave the office again to head to the training room. It wasn't as small as the room he and Uraraka had used at their old gym, but neither was it like U.A.'s training grounds. Either way, he wouldn't need much room to take Icy Hot down and he was itching to just rage. At least Todoroki would put up a good fight if nothing else. He smiled with excitement when his boss finally entered the room.
"I hope you're ready to lose, Todoroki!"
Todoroki rolled his eyes in response, unfazed by the other man's taunts. It wasn't anything he hadn't heard before. "You sure you don't want to just talk about it?" he asked as he assumed a defensive stance.
Bakugo glared at him and said nothing, also shifting into a fighting position.
Todoroki rolled his eyes. "That's what I thought. You never were very good about using your words instead of your hands."
"Let me fucking demonstrate just what I can do with these hands, Icy Hot!" Bakugo yelled before charging him head-on with incredible speed.
Todoroki's right hand was faster. Bakugo made it within five feet of him before he was encased in ice with only his head exposed.
"I think you could use some time to cool off," Todoroki said, the faintest hint of a smirk on his face.
"Rrrgh…!" Bakugo growled, his body beginning to glow beneath the ice. "You've GOT to stop with these jokes!" The ice then shattered into pieces around him and smoked spiraled away from his palms, then he was upon Todoroki in an instant, his hand ready to blast him. "Die!"
Todoroki's left hand was up next, shoving Bakugo away and creating a wall of flame between them.
Bakugo jumped back a few feet, barely missing the impact of Todoroki's flames. He sneered at him. All this heat was only going to make Bakugo sweat more, and if that happened, his gauntlets would store enough ammo to blow the whole agency to smithereens. "Now you wanna use your flames, eh? That's fine. I can take the heat!" He brought his fingers up to his opposite palm, a bead of light flickered to life inside the circle they created. "Howitzer Impact!" The light became fire and stream-lined straight for Todoroki.
The other man dodged, throwing up both arms so that a wall of fire and ice each erupted, flanking Bakugo on either side and stretching toward the ceiling to limit his mobility. "I never understood your need to yell out your attacks and tell your opponent what to expect."
This, of course, only made Bakugo angrier. He continued his onslaught with one explosion after another. Every time he was met with either ice or fire. After what seemed like forever, Bakugo finally relented...slightly.
"All right, Icy Hot. Our quirks aren't gonna let us lay a hand on each other and this is fucking pointless." He pressed a button on the inside of each of his gauntlets and slid them off, then tossed them to the floor. He kept his gloves and arm sleeves on to help stabilize his arms, though. They were pretty worn out after all the blasting he just did.
But he wasn't about to admit that to Todoroki.
"Hand to hand combat, then? That's fine by me." Todoroki shrugged out of his shirt which had been half burned away by the activation of his left side.
Bakugo snarled, getting close enough to be able to hit him. "This doesn't mean you win!" He brought his leg up to start off with a kick. He'd learned a long time ago that when you start fighting with a right hook, people tend to take notice.
Todoroki moved quickly, turning to dodge the kick and bringing his own fist up to collide with Bakugo's jaw while the other man was still off balance from the kick.
Bakugo just barely managed to dodge, but he sneered at Todoroki with a small scoff. "You missed me." He twirled and came to a stop on both feet before jumping back to land a strike with his fist.
They were as evenly matched in hand-to-hand combat as they were with their quirks. Bakugo wasn't feeling much better about anything, and Todoroki's facial expression never seemed to change. Was this even phasing him? Because Bakugo felt so tired he might break. Each man had managed to land a few blows on the other, but neither were ready to quit.
Bakugo wasn't going to give up. Not against this guy.
"Getting tired, Ground Zero? If you surrender, you won't be in trouble with all this mess you started." Said Todoroki, fists up.
"Psh! Maybe if you hired more competent sidekicks and let me work alone this wouldn't have happened in the first place!" Yelled Bakugo.
"That wouldn't do any good and you know it."
"Oh, don't you dare talk to me like I'm stupid, Icy Hot."
Todoroki rolled his eyes at that. "You know, now that I think about it, I think I liked you better when you were dating Uraraka. You certainly didn't seem to argue with me so much."
Bakugo growled, cracking his knuckles and lunging at him in a blind rage. "AND WHAT WOULD YOU FUCKING KNOW ABOUT IT? AS IF BEING WITH A WOMAN IS THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING! YOU'RE JUST AS BORING AND STONE COLD AS YOU WERE BEFORE YOU GOT FUCKING MARRIED! YOU CAN'T FOOL ME!"
He knew he was better with Uraraka, too. He felt better, and happier. Invincible, like nothing could touch him. He knew, and maybe everyone else did, too, that all his yelling and boasting was really just to hide the coward buried deep within him. The weak side of himself. He held everyone at arm's length for nearly all his life. Until she managed to knock down his walls.
But then she had to go and lie. Why did she have to lie?
Todoroki could tell that what he said had angered Bakugo enough to distract him, and he used it to his advantage. He grabbed Bakugo's arm and flipped him overhead, slamming him into the floor. Bakugo let out an agonized gasp for air.
He stood back, and Bakugo stayed down, breathing hard. "I believe this means I win."
Bakugo groaned and slowly sat up. "No shit, Sherlock." He grumbled, wiping a little blood from his lip from a punch Todoroki had landed earlier.
"So I take it you'll be on your best behavior from here on out?" Todoroki approached him, reaching out a hand to help him up if he needed it.
Bakugo smacked his hand away and slowly came to stand on his own. "Fine. Fuck off, Todoroki." He walked away from his boss and toward the door, a slight limp in his gait.
Bakugo arrived at their break room around ten minutes after his brawl with Todoroki. Between his sore leg and back, he had to walk a little bit slower than usual. He went to the fridge and opened the freezer. He reached inside and came back with an ice pack. He pressed it to his slightly swollen cheek and sighed with relief. He wasn't hurt too bad. Nothing some stretching and minor first aid wouldn't help, along with a good night's sleep.
He closed the freezer and sat down in a chair at one of the few tables in the room. He'd go rinse the blood off his face in a few minutes. The ice felt good against his cheek so he relished in it while he could. Playbacks from his fight reeled through his mind, causing a scowl to form on his face.
"I can't believe I fucking lost. Stupid Icy Hot bastard." He growled just a decibel above a mumble. Saying that bit about him and Uraraka had jumbled his focus. And the bastard probably knew it would, too. In other words, he fucking cheated. Growling again, Bakugo slowly stood up and limped over to the kitchen sink against the far wall. He turned on the water, setting the ice pack to the side. He needed to wash the blood off his face.
The door to the break room swung open and Uraraka entered, empty mug in hand as she headed toward the coffee pot for a refill. She paused midway into the room when she realized just who else was in the room with her.
He didn't look up at her and she took that to mean he was still ignoring her as he had the last few weeks, so she slowly made her way to the coffee pot and set her mug on the counter next to it.
Bakugo's back had been toward her when she entered the room, but now that she was just at the opposite end of the counter and could see his bruised and bloody face in profile, she let out an audible gasp. "Are you okay?" she asked, genuinely concerned.
His red eyes flicked up at her for a literal second before he snarled and looked away. She was the last person he wanted to be around right now.
She sighed and turned away, reaching for the coffee pot. "Still not speaking to me, I see."
He didn't want to say anything, but the image of her with Deku earlier replayed in his mind and he couldn't stop himself from practically spitting out, "I don't see how I can when you're out galavanting with fucking Deku." He glared at her.
The comment and the venom behind it caught her off guard, causing coffee to slosh over the side of her mug as she poured it. "What?" She grabbed a paper towel, using it to sop up the mess as she turned to look at him. "Do you mean when we went to lunch last week? Am I not allowed to go to lunch with a friend? Because that's all it was. Lunch with a friend."
"Tch." He looked away from her again, then moved to go sit with his ice pack once more. "Whatever."
She followed, abandoning her half-filled coffee mug on the counter. "You can't say something like that and then just walk away, Katsuki. If you would just listen to me—"
The use of his first name did him in. He slammed his hand down on the table. "I don't wanna fucking hear it, Uraraka. This conversation is over." He abruptly stood up without looking at her and headed for the door.
As he neared the exit, Kirishima came around the corner carrying some kind of box of food. He could practically feel the tension in the room like he'd just been submerged in it. He saw Bakugo coming his way and Uraraka standing by the table. "Uh… am I interrupting something?"
Bakugo said nothing and pushed past him to promptly exit the room. Kirishima watched him go and turned back to Uraraka.
Their eyes met briefly and he could see she looked close to tears before she, too, brushed past him and out of the room.
Kirishima sighed and continued into the kitchen to put his lunch in the fridge. He noticed the pale pink coffee mug sitting half filled with the coffee-soaked paper towel abandoned beside it and frowned.
Personally, he thought Bakugo was being a stubborn idiot and taking this too far, but no one had asked his opinion, so he kept that to himself. He could understand why Bakugo has been upset, of course, but freezing her out was the same mistake he made last time and obviously he wasn't learning from his mistakes if what he'd just walked in on was any indication.
He grabbed the paper towel and threw it in the trash, then returned to the fridge and pulled out the creamer marked with Uraraka's initials and added some to the mug, then carried it out of the break room and to her desk, but she was nowhere to be seen, so he set it next to her computer and headed toward his own desk.
Probably crying in the bathroom, he thought. He'd overheard a conversation between Mina and Tsuyu a few days prior that seemed to indicate she'd been doing a lot of that lately.
Kirishima's assumption had been correct.
Uraraka's eyes were still red and swollen by the time her patrol shift rolled around that afternoon. The coffee he'd left on her desk was cold by the time she'd returned to it and she regretted not going back for more as she and Kareino walked side by side down one of the city's quieter streets.
He was babbling on about something to do with his girlfriend's upcoming birthday, but she wasn't really listening. Her mind was too preoccupied with thoughts of Bakugo.
She just wished he would talk to her. Give her a chance to explain better...anything. But he wouldn't even look at her most days, and when he did, it wasn't the way he'd looked at her before and it felt like an ice shard through her heart every time.
Since he wouldn't talk to her, she'd tried other approaches, too. She'd left apology notes on his desk alongside a box of his favorite green tea mochi from the cafe only to see them all in the trash later, melted ice cream staining her apology note green. The envelope didn't even look like it had been opened.
She supposed it was time to admit to herself that it was over. Really, truly over.
The thought alone made her want to cry again, but she held her tears back.
She was so distracted that she hadn't even noticed the man she was about to run into until it was too late.
"Excuse me—" she started to say, moving to go around him when her eyes landed on his face and time felt as if it stopped.
"Ah, yes. Miss Uravity. Just who I was hoping to see."
"Sato." she muttered, her eyes wide with fear.
"My, I do love that expression on your face, hero." Sato chuckled. "And I'll love it getting better when I cut your heart out."
Kareino's eyes shot open wide as realization struck him. "Wait, is this-?" He raised his fists to get ready to use his quirk.
Uraraka jumped away from the villain and yelled back, "Kareino, get away NOW!"
The next thing she knew, she was losing blood quickly and could hear the screams from civilians who had watched their battle. Her vision was growing darker by the second, and as it went black, the last thing she heard was Sato's laughter deep in his chest.
"Nighty-night, Miss Hero."