28.
A few days after the concert, Five got late for their usual evening meeting; Marben didn't worry, didn't even get angry, but at the same time she hadn't been able to fully concentrate on the music she had tried to study to pass the time while waiting for him. So when Five came out of nowhere on the dark staircase outside the window, the girl ran to open it, abandoning violin and bow as if freeing herself of a burden.
"Five! Why did you take so long?" she asked watching as her boyfriend climbed over the windowsill. In response, Five gave her a dark look.
"The Apocalypse".
"Uh?".
"That's why I took so long, I had to face the end of the world!" he ranted, irked that Marben wasn't following. When she kept looking at him impassively, however, the boy knew he had to explain himself. And apologize too, for he realized he had overreacted. "Sorry, it's…at the Academy a lot of noise has been made about nonsense, lately, and I needed to…you know".
"Yeah, deal with it in your usual emotionally inept way" Marben countered, prickly but without real malice, and anyway softening right after. "It's okay, babe. Shit happens, sometimes we need to play it down to stay sane" she said kindly, taking Five by the hand and guiding him toward the bed. They sat together, side by side, in silence for a moment. Marben managed to coax Five into resting his head on her shoulder, and took to gently pet his back.
"Wanna talk about it?".
"No, it's bullshit…just the old man's notebook that's nowhere to be found". Hearing that, Marben instantly tensed.
"The one on which he writes down all the monstrosities he then inflicts on you all?". Five nodded.
"I should be glad that junk has gone who knows where…".
"But he's punishing you all, isn't he? Because he thinks you made it vanish".
"…yes". Marben swallowed audibly.
"Does he hurt you?".
"No, he just threatens us. If the notebook doesn't come out, however, in a few days he'll begin to make us skip meals and stand facing the wall for hours".
"Are your siblings alright?".
"Yes, they are. I'm just a little…'worried' about Ben, though: he's been acting withdrawn, as of late, it's like he can't handle the pressure like he did a while ago".
"Is he not talking to you?".
"Not so much, but that's not what worries me. He looks scared, sometimes even paranoid…I don't understand what's going on with him".
"Oh, shit…".
"Don't worry, Doll" Five said eventually, determined to end the matter as he pulled himself up and smiled at her with a hint of bitterness, "It sucks, but it could be worse...as strange as it may seem, he never hit us". But Marben failed to lose her gloominess, and Five realized that perhaps he hadn't understood everything. "Hey, what's wrong?".
"Why the heck do we always end up talking about your father? I swear, it's suffocating!" the girl snapped then, surprising him.
"True…" Five found himself conceding, a little dazed. "We should make it a rule, never to mention him when we're together". The girl's blue-green eyes darted in his, conveying sternness.
"As long as I see you angry, hurt, exhausted or even just wearing that uniform he will always be present. Even if we don't name him".
"Okay, so what about not talking about him from now on?" the boy sighed, and unexpectedly, something in the girl's eyes shifted and Marben took in.
"Fine. Change the subject then" she replied, as if she wanted to challenge him. Five looked at her for a moment, stunned, then a playful smile curved his lips.
"Bossy!".
"Quit sniveling, you like it when I am".
"You know what else do I like?".
"Peanut butter and marshmallow sandwiches?".
"A part from that" the boy snickered. Marben smiled at him innocently.
"Me, I hope".
"Definitely" Five smiled back. "But I meant spacial jumping".
"Oh, that's what you wanna talk about?".
"It's a topic like any other".
"Yeah, because I'm dating a superhero…come on then, special kid, introduce me to your ability". Laying a kiss on her boyfriend's cheek, Marben kicked off her shoes and climbed backwards on the bed, sitting cross-legged in the middle of it; Five wasted no time and did the same, sitting himself in front of her.
"First thing you need to know is that it's not gonna work without math" the boy said almost conspiratorially, but apparently Marben wasn't happy with the premise, and throwing her head back with dramatic emphasis she dropped on the pillows.
"Alright, I'm already screwed! You might as well find some other thing to ta…".
"Don't give up so easily! Come on, listen to me: every time I jump, first I have to calculate the probability that the particles my body is made of may be located in a given point of space and at a certain time…". With that, Five gained a moderately curious glance from his riotous girlfriend.
"'Particles', you say. Is this about quantum physics?". Five's face lit up with an awed smile.
"Quantum mechanics". Marben snorted.
"Indeed, I was wrong".
"Don't think about it" Five cut her off. "I was saying, everything is based on the calculation of probabilities. The probability that the particles of which I am composed are found here or there across time and space is given by a complex value called wave function, which I get by solving Schrodinger's equation".
"…okay, go on".
"Schrodinger's equation is the set of symbols indicating forces and interactions to which each individual particle is subjected: any of these - henceforth we will call them operators - must be applied to a state - we can define it as the point of existence of the particle - to see which ones can turn them into other states. Are you following?". Marben nodded, although looking pensive.
"I guess. Practically speaking, you mean that if to the place where the particles exist at the beginning you apply the variables of the equation referring to another place, you understand...if the particles coexist simultaneously in the two places?".
"Good job! Although not all variables switch between them, like position and speed, therefore their simultaneous measurement is impossible, as said by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle".
"Right, so you have to do these calculations for each one of your particles? How do you know how many you have?".
"Through the Avogadro constant…" Five began, to then stop abruptly, waving a hand in the air. "It doesn't matter anyway, because it's not necessary to find out how many molecules I am made of, but where I can find myself within time and space. Basically where I can stop existing in one moment and start existing in the next".
"Wow...so you dematerialize, when you jump from one place to another?".
"Uh...I don't think so…I think I'm just moving from here to there, in one piece". Marben tittered with fondness, hearing Five's faltering speech.
"How does it feel when you jump?".
"Like jolts of electrostatic energy around my fists and all over my body, but it's stronger on the fists. Didn't you feel them when we jumped together?".
"No. I just feel like the air is being sucked out of my lungs and I'm free-diving until we land" Marben replied, seemingly absorbed in her thoughts. It only took a few seconds for her to expose them. "I was thinking, though...you talked about space and time. So could you also time-travel, in this same way?". The smile Five gave her could have lit the entire building.
"YES! Just that! But…I can't do it. And I'm not allowed to".
"Oh…what a pity!" said Marben, somberly, watching the boy's face curl up in a pout. Five didn't stay gloomy for long, though.
"Yeah…d'you know, however, what is the good news?".
"No, what is it?".
"You're a fucking genius, Marben! Do you realize that?".
"Every now and then I have the distinct impression of having been left behind, waving goodbye at my brain that has started at full speed towards an idea…" answered Marben in an accommodating tone, earning herself a look of disbelief and confusion from Five. "I mean, I realize I'm not stupid, but no less than genial…".
"You are, stop being modest. And how is it even possible that you managed to follow a reasoning about a topic you don't know in the slightest and yet you don't understand basic math for shit?".
"Being smart doesn't mean knowing or understanding everything. However, my being bad at it has always been cause of disappointment in the family: my Grandma was a professor of maths at the University of Cambridge" the girl explained.
"Oh…I'm sorry" offered Five, sounding dismayed. Marben, however, looked back at him with an impertinent smile.
"What for? She's not dead, she just has been retired for thirty years!". The two teens exchanged a look - amused on Marben's part, embarrassed on Five's - and then burst out laughing.
"So, did your family count on you taking after her?".
"They hoped for it…a lot is expected of me. After all, I'm the firstborn". Marben's admission, made in a low voice and with a slightly self-critical smile accompanied by a shrug, compromised the lightness with which the two teens had been conversing of spacial jumping, without however completely dissipating it; impressing himself, Five understood then that even Marben, who came from a loving and consolidated family, could feel insecure about her role within it, and that saddened him.
"What is it like, having grandparents?" he asked thereupon, trying to distract her, and internally rejoiced when he managed to snatch a smile from the girl.
"Funny. My Grandma is all reasoning, in opposition to Grandpa who takes care of the vegetable garden and the animals: once a week he comes to London to bring us fresh eggs, and those for my uncles he delivers them to us because he believes in Mayfair people are too posh to know that eggs come out of hens' arses".
Five laughed so loudly that Marben had to cover his mouth and beg him to contain himself, fearing they would have ended up getting caught; the boy seized his chance to hug her and roll on the mattress, finding himself lying on top of her, starting to cover her in kisses while she giggled in turn, giving back as much as she got. Feeling tired, after a while, they laid there, hugged to each other, Five with his head resting on Marben's chest and Marben playing with Five's hair. It took Marben that moment of bliss to realize one of the most beautiful things she ever happened to witness.
"I'm so very much proud of you, Five". The boy craned his neck to look up at her, in confusion.
"Uh? For what?".
"For realizing I needed some comfort, earlier, and overshadowing your problems in order to help me. The boy I met back in September would never have done something like that".
"Yeah, that's more like...your thing. Being worthy of you is quite difficult, to me".
"Don't be so hard on yourself, you're everything I could wish for". Marben meant it seriously, she was telling the truth without adding any sentimentality; but seeing Five's whole face soften into an expression full of love did render euphoric her entire being. "I'm sorry I've been such an arse, earlier, by the way".
"It's okay, Peaches" replied Five, reaching out to stroke her cheek, "My Father puts a strain on you too, I know. And how comes we're talking about him again?".
"You're right. We've got something better to say…".
"Which is?". Marben reached out to kiss him on the lips.
"I love you" .
"I love you too, Doll. Thanks for being proud of my progress".
"Thank you for making them".
A/N: Should there be any quantum mechanics expert among you...please be patient: I have never studied it, I just read something about it for pleasure!
I hope you enjoyed the chapter :) and I thank you very much for the support you continue to give to 'By your window'. You are fantastic!
Now let's move on to serious things: FINALLY WE KNOW WHEN SEASON 2 WILL BE OUT! Who wants to fangirl with me? As we're used to say, here in Italy, MADONNA SANTAAAAAAAAAAAA (translation: holy maryyyyyyyyyyyyyy)! Guys I'm not ok. I haven't been able to think of anything alse since yesterday. I'm serious. Send help.