He backed off and turned serious. "Do you really mind that much?" There was something in the way he said it. Something in their connection that told her this was more than just lust. Something that made her sad. "No, I don't mind. Of course I don't mind. I love it when you want me. But something else is behind this and I want you to tell me." He sighed and looked at the floor. "I will, just, not right now, ok?" She kissed him on the tip of his nose. "Ok. When you're ready." There was no point in pushing him. The harder she pushed the more tight lipped he became. Rose trusted that if it were anything worrying he would tell her.

Chapter 47 Whats Wrong

"Come on then. Let's go get this over with." She pulled his hand. He sighed and followed behind. The reception room was full of people. All talking at once and there was music covering it all. The sound was deafening to him. They were given name tags and a number to find their table. Once most of the people were seated, the evening's host, a handsome young man in a tux stood on a stage and clanked a glass to get their attention. Finally, the room quieted down, and he began to speak.

"Welcome everyone to the all inclusive Paradise Ranch. I'm your concierge, Nathan. If there is anything you want or need, please come to, or call my office in the outer lobby. If I'm not there, my staff will make it right. Here in Paradise we want you to be happy and without care. You are free to do as much or as little as you want. Go anywhere, do anything, well…as long as it doesn't bother another guest too much.

SO…, All day at the pool? All day at the casino? All day at the pub? Cooking classes in the kitchen? Crafts for the kids? There are sixteen miles of hiking trails throughout the forty acres of the ranch. A very large swimming pool and spa. Ring the kitchen for a picnic lunch, the garage for a cycle or speeder, the stadium for sports equipment of all kinds. Anything you want, anytime you want it. There is a complete list of our amenities outside my office and in the welcome packet in your rooms. For now, let's just enjoy our dinner and join me for cocktails and dancing in the Blue Room."

The crowd clapped politely, and the meal was served. Rose could see the tedium of small talk with so many people was beginning to make her husband cranky. Rose whispered to him quietly, "Let's go before I want to gnaw off my leg to get away." He looked down at her and smiled. They stood together and made their excuses to those around the table and headed for the door.

Rose didn't want to go to the room just yet, and didn't want to go dancing in yet another room full of people. "Let's go for a walk?" He nodded in agreement. Standing in front of the hotel there was a choice of left or right. Neither of them wanted to pick a direction, but when a group of noisy people came down the sidewalk, they went the opposite way.

It was nice. Just strolling, hand in hand aimlessly. Rose stopped to look in a shop window now and again. He stopped to keep tabs on their direction and distance from the hotel. When they came to the end of the street and lights, they just kept going. Soon they were far enough away to no longer hear the noise of the town or even see it's lights. It was very dark, and the stars were the brightest she had seen in years. An occasional shooting star would light the sky.

They sat on a dune and listened for even the smallest sound, but could hear nothing but the wind. There still were not many animals on the planet and most of them were domestic food animals on carefully managed ranches. An occasional dog or cat would be seen, but they were cherished and pampered pets.

This world still had no wild prey or predator creatures. It made the desert they looked at seem so dead and alien. When he spoke suddenly, it made her jump to hear sound. "There are plans for six new cities. One of them here in the desert. They will call it New Phoenix." He rolled his eyes. "Why do they all have to be, New, this or that? Trying to make this place like home I suppose.

They will come and build a city that will house thousands more people, and the landscape will never be the same. It makes me sad in a way, so much of this world has been changed to the use of man. It was a paradise when we first came. We were like Adam and Eve." Rose put her head on his shoulder, "That's why it was created. Without man this world, like so many others, would be an empty barren rock with no atmosphere, and no one would be here to admire it's wonders." He smiled a chuckle, "Humans."

Rose said softly, "Will you tell me now what's troubling you?" He drew a deep breath and kissed her forehead. "There was an incident at the last job site I was at. A worker and I were on a six-story platform that was supposed to be secured to the main structure." He stopped a moment, reliving the incident. "Instead, it gave way, and the man fell to his death. I couldn't reach him in time. I managed to grab onto a girder until I could get down. Time Lord reflexes.

On the ground, I was told the man had a family. I stared at his body thinking that an inch in the wrong direction and it could have been me. I would have regenerated, but it wouldn't be this me coming home to you. I suddenly saw all the time I had missed away from you and Alice and I grew sick with regret. I started to wonder if you would love the new me, whoever that was. He would have my memories, but he wouldn't be me. And what would it do to Alice?" Rose's eyes were filled with horror and she hugged him for all she was worth trying not to let him see the tears in her eyes. He patted her hands, "I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry every time I left the house." He sighed again.

"I'm going to tell them I am scaling back my involvement with the new city projects to spend more time with my family. No exceptions. But I guess It's making me a bit needy right now. I want to make up for all the nights we slept alone.

It was what she had been hoping for, though not in such a tragic way. Her fear mingled with joy at that last statement. She knew he was going to miss being involved as deeply as he was. Not knowing which feeling to express she settled for a long hug, as it expressed both. They held each other in the sand for a long time. Grateful to still have one another to cling to.

After a while Rose yawned and they decided to go back. It had been a long day despite sleeping in so late. She had wanted to have a picnic the next day and see some of the landscape. They had been cooped up too long on that transport. By the time they got back to their room they just wanted to sleep.

Dawn came as it should. They had forgotten to close the curtains and light began to stream in waking Rose. She put on her robe and went to the balcony to sit and watch the warm sun illuminate the mountains. The colors were so bold. Yellow and red and orange with streaks of purple. She could see the trails that had been carved into the hills for the guests to hike on. The smell of the air was different too. It had an odd sort of clean smell. With no pollen and very little pollution, it felt almost like pure oxygen.

She was definitely in need of a cup of tea and called down for room service. He was still sleeping when it came. She decided not to wake him this time. She had felt him get up more than once the night before. Nightmares. Of what she wasn't sure, but it was enough to make him sit up with his head in his hands for a few moments. When he lay back down she could feel him staring at her. Wanting to touch her for comfort, but not wanting to disturb her. She had rolled over on her side so he could snuggle up and sleep.

Chapter 48 Fear