TRIS POV
Chapter song : Treat you Better by Shawn Mendes
I wake up to a soft hand rubbing against my arm. Even though she hasn't been there for me... From a long time. When I needed her. I could never forget her touch.
"Beatrice, honey breakfasts ready. I wanted to have a talk before I leave. We will be back home today for dinner but dad is gone now and I really don't want to talk about this in front of him."
"Hey mom. When did you get home"
"1 in the morning. The flight was late and they-"
"as usual expect you on time again"
She sighs as if tired of being around me. What an irony. Duh.
"Baby, it is just my job. I can't help it."
I sit up against my pillow and ask her, "What did you want to talk about?"
She clears her throat and says, "I'll get your breakfast here."
As I brush my teeth, yesterday's evens run over my head. I finger the sticker in the bottle I used yesterday.
"ANTI-ANXIETY PILLS"
I HAVEN'T have had to eat those since the past 2 years. Ever since I became 'known' at school as a major player. Having 'fake' one night stands.
My clothes had become more revealing but not to an extent that I wear none at all. But some part of me couldn't just get over the anxiety about my looks.
I am cut out of my dream as mom places a plate on the bed. I grab my hair into a ponytail and move to sit on my bed across my mom.
"woah pancakes. Is it something special" I grab a huge bite into my mouth.
My mom chuckles as she starts, "no. I just wanted to cook today." she gives 5 second pause "so... Beatrice.. I received an email from school. They said they are starting with the health education program this semester and it would be graded. So there are parts of it that they wanted the parents to discuss with their kids. I know I am mostly not around but this is really important. "
" okay go on. " I scoop another large bite into my mouth.
" Beatrice I know you are almost 18 and you might want to... Discover new things... You might be curious. And I am totally for it. But you need to be safe. And they talked about a section on... " by this time, I am as red as a tomato. I open my mouth to stop mom from venturing any further but she lifts a hand and stops me." let me finish I have to get to work and God... This is so hard. Okay so I'll be direct believing that you know what we are talking about. See the thing is that I know you want to explore new things and trust me even I wanted that and I did. The school will also be talking about this but it is important for the parents to know what their kids are doing. I know most kids are faster than the school and they have already done it before the school teaches them the basics but it is a good initiative. " I open my mouth again but stuff it with pancakes to distract my eyes from mom's," I am not going to stop you from doing it but I really need to make sure you don't compromise yourself or take any risks while... You know. And it is super awkward for me but we need to have this talk. If you ever have sex,"... I almost spit out my pancake when mom says that word." please use a condom." she continues ignoring my spiting condition." Beatrice, I am going to give you pills. But they don't work until a month it is your choice if you want to use a condom or a pill. According to me you should use a condom because pills may have side affects and I don't want to risk it for you before anything happens. We can take a test and then we may find the suitable pill. Also they protect you from std's... "
" Mom stop! I know that okay" I say to cut her out.
She sighs.
"I trust you honey, just make right choice. I want you to never regret any decision of yours. Find 'the' one okay. And don't let go out of hand. Remember... Too much control or too much submission is... Kind of harmful. It all depends on you in the end. Just be careful. " she stares at me for a second, her hand on my cheek." I love you honey... I need to go now. Bye. " I sit there red as hell as she exits the door only to peep back in," oh honey are you driving today. "
" Yeh I am" I smile at her out of embarrassment to hide the tint of red all over my face. "Bye mom."
I close the door and I turn back to my closet. "F7ck me" I huff out.
I pair my skinny jeans with a simple crop top and put my hair in a braid.
Pretty good.
I get to my locker once I park the car just to be interrupted by Christina as she babbled on about some song that she liked.
"omg Tris you totally have to come over on Friday. I saw this really cute movie that I want to watch with you. Also we haven't had a movie date in like forever."
"God Chris calm down, she will be there", Will interrupts her.
"Hey pancycakes!" Uriah comes in with Mar.
"Uri cut it out." I say.
"What I am hungry" he grabs the sandwich out of Will's hand and chomps down on it. "a growing boy's gotta eat."
" Okay guys so we had this idea of going zip lining on Friday" Mar says.
"No we have a Movie date that night m
Mar, how can you forget!" Chris whines.
"Oh shoot, I totally forgot. I think we should go ahead," she turns to Uriah and starts to speak only to be cut off by him, "Uri Babe,..."
"Nuhuh we are going zip lining" he says "No excuses ladies."
The group is still incomplete... I wanted to know where Four was, a lingering apprehension of the consequences of yesterday's talk. "Uri, where's Zeke... And Four" I gulp down my my own saliva which had collected out of sheer panic.
"Oh Zeke is outside and he was going to wait for Four out there they had some football shit to discuss."
As if on cue, Zeke enters with Shauna smacking him on his head. He tackles her as they come closer.
"Guys cut it out." I shift my gaze to Four behind Zeke, looking handsome as hell. His muscles peeking about just enough through his black T shirt. Leaving the rest to imagination. His pants fitting him... Well... Quite... Fine. His bag casually over his shoulder and the other one in his pocket.
They stop in front of the circle joining in the conversation. I turn off my surroundings... He is trying so hard not to make eye contact but ends up doing it anyways. I hear him suck in a breath as he turns his gaze away.
"Okay WE ARE GOING ZIP LINING ON FRIDAY"
"Uri you're full of shit" Shauna says "sabotaging our night".
" Okay guy wait. We can go zipline before your night, will that work." Will says.
"No" Shauna an Mar scream.
"Okay wait... See the zipline would hardly take like 1 hour, we got plenty of time after that. You girls can go to your movie night we will drop you" Zeke cuts in.
"Oh and what will you be doing till then" Shauna say moving across Four to reach Zeke causing him to move towards me. " I know you guys would be hooking up at some bar watching strippers" "No that's not happening."
"Darling you will be the only girl I want to see naked for the rest of my life" Zeke says in a ridiculously cheesy voice.
"God stop it.. Pervert" she laughs it off kissing him on lips. She likes that... A lot.
"Groooosssss PDA" Uri yells.
"Okay wait, you guys promise me that there will be no strippers at wherever you go okay then this plan would work" Chris says.
Just as I go on to agree to the plan, I feel someone place their hands on my hips, the hands slide onto my stomach holding me from behind. My body freezes as the hands slide across my belly botton to pull me back into a warm solid chest.
" Hey beautiful" his voice, warm like honey rings in my ear.
I turn in his arms... Relaxing finally. "God, you gave a heart attack Eric" I slap his chest with my arms. He chuckles it of. I hear Uri whistle.
"Who do we have here"
"Sorry girls he is taken." Chris's voice rings in my ear as I turn to face them again I realise she is talking about both of us. Standing between Four and Eric.
I roll my eyes.
"So people, meet my cousin, Eric Coulter. All the way from VEGAS" Will says.
I can feel Four tense up beside me. His body stiff and rigid. He is standing up straight. Eric puts an arm across my waist, I smile up at him, hyper aware of Four practically scorching me with his gaze.
"You didn't tell me you were coming today" I ask him.
"He wanted it to be a surprise, he has been here since the past half an hour." Will says, chomping on off the second sandwich.
"God you two are already so cute" Chris says.
I feel him shift from feet to feet, heat radiating off his body.
"Tris we are going to have a loooong talk on Friday" Mar says.
"God guys we are not dating." I say looking up at Eric.
"Are you sure" he narrows his eyes at me.
"How did you get in in the middle of the session" I hear his voice as my face looses part of its smile.
"Oh it was a sports thing. You know football." he smirks at Four eyeing him.
"Wohoo, welcome to the team man." Zeke claps him on the back.
I feel Four staring at me.
"Well Eric, I am the quarterback." Four moves his hand to shake Eric's all the way looking at me smirking in process.
They shake hands as if it was a business deal. So formal. I feel chills passing between them. Icy stares. Eric pulls me closer to him. My smile vanishes completely as I see Four's muscles tense again. Rigid and aggressive. He clenched his bag strap his knuckles white.
Eric knows something is up between us. Me and Four.
He looks down at me bringing his face closer to mine. I pull back a bit putting distance between us but still in his arms and smile back to cut out the tension.
"I am going to steal my girl... Bye folks." he pulls back completely interacting our fingers and turning back.
"Eric stop it" I give him a disapproving glare. He ignores it and pulls me away from the group towards the other way.
"You need to give me a thorough tour, Babe." he says as I trail behind him, him holding my hand as of I were a lost child. I dont like this.
I cant help but turn my gaze back to his intense one out of all my friends... Only his. And I see it.
So clear. So true. So sincere. He is hurt. And he is angry. Upset. About something. My heart tells it has something to do with Eric. And I don't want to believe what my heart tells me this time so I turn back towards Eric, his arm slipping over my shoulder pulling me with him. I tune out my friends voices.
"Goooshhh I am sooo happy..." Chris can be heard.
The rest of the day goes by pretty uneventful. Until the time I dreaded.
Lunch.
As I sit opposite to Chris. Four sits far away as possible suckling on his tetra juice pack talking some shit with Zeke.
Eric hands me my juice which he offered to get from the counter and sits beside me.
"So bro, what are you doing on Friday?" Uri starts.
"Nothing much, just getting some shifting and cleaning done with mom"
"Well I thought your family is not coming after till a time" I say looking at him.
"oh yes... Its my apartment. I brought it here. You know... I wanted to be... Independent." he says looking around the table.
"Bro you already got an apartment. I can't even afford my clothes." Zeke pips in.
"That is because you are always getting these stupid video games." Shauna to the rescue.
"hey I am not that bad." he says defensively.
"So Four I heard that your father was in the government" Eric says. "Isn't he like on the council or something"
"Yes" he grunts.
"Bro chill. Why are you so grumpy. It was a simple question. I heard my mom mentioning him. He is pretty awesome. She met him once. They knew each other in high school." he says a tone of mockery in his voice.
Four tenses at this. He goes pale.
"You better shut your mouth Eric, this is not your place speaking..." before Four can finish Zeke starts to diffuse the tension. Eric has a small but noticable smirk on his face.
" Well there are a lot of government officials in here." he laughs making others laugh. I dont know what happens by my laughter dies when I see him. He is not in a good shape. He looks away to the queue in front of the lunch counter trying to find someone or something to hide behind. But... Why? It was just a simple question.
Uri continues, "Bruh so I was asking will you come with us zip lining on Friday!" it wil be so awesome.
"Yeh it's a great idea. A good bonding time with the gang Eric. You should totally come after school." Will says.
"Guys I'll think about it. It's cool i think I'll make it after school"he says.
"Well," Four says with a bite of food in his mouth, "Don't you have to help your MOTHER Eric" "I don't think she would appreciate her son hanging out with rich fuckers and getting his own ass spoilt."
Eric's face twists into a painful angry expression. Just the reason that Four offended Eric doesnt bug me. But it does not thrills me either.
"okay people see you in gym." Four says. Picking up his tray an dealing to exit the lunch hall.
I stare at him back. His broad shoulders not too broad but taut with well defined muscles. Just enough to show he is extremely strong and fit. He is not buffed like many other guys... Lean enough to make him impeccably hot. I see his muscles flex as he pulls the door open to exit the hall. I can't get my eyes off his black hair, my hands were in there a few days ago as he took away my virginity, they were soft... Soothing... Calming. My hand slipped through them scratch ing hard on his scalp pulling at the hair sometimes. They were just the finest ones I had ever touched... Just long enough to pull and short enough to nake him look sexy...
I realise that the rest of the world was there as Eric turns my attention to him. "Tris we should leave its almost time." The table continues to chatter the girls bantering about whatnot and Uri feeding in certain compliments. Zeke... He is quiet. Kind of thinking. He knows Four too well. Maybe that's why.
Eric pulls me with him as I am lost in thought. I stand in front of the line to deposit my tray as lunch is almost over, Zeke comes behind me whispering into my ear, "Tris be careful." I can't help but suck in a breath before he passes me ahead to the line.
The rest of the day is again uneventful. Even though Four and I had some classes and Eric was with me. He never paid any attention that he earlier used to. He was awfully quiet and he was laser focused. It seemed as if he was pulling away. From all of us.
At football, Amar introduced Eric again as the new member of the football team. Eric shakes hands with all the players and they start a new game today.
"So he is a good kisser huh?" Chris says, practically drooling over Eric as we warm up in our pairs.
"We have have been on one date Chris. We have not kissed and that is not happening for a long time now."
"Come on baby... Kiss him already" Shauna quips in from beside us, warming up with another girl.
"Shau, you guys have boyfriends!"
"Jeez I know she was talking about you baby girl. He is hot." Chris says.
"Okay guys warm up is over... Positions now." Tori yells.
As Chris hoes and gets in her position Shauna lingers back, "What was with Four and Eric today, she narrows her eyes at me" shoot.
"God how would I know. You guys are practically pushing me with him to be his girlfriend which I am clearly not" I walk ahead as I hear her huff out my name.
We practice for half and hour as we take out 5 minute break. I see Four playing. Sweat being his forehead and arms as he passes the ball to Edward. Eric tries to dribble it out between them but Four ends up pushing Eric a but to his side. Harsh. He falls down and scrapes his knee and Amar halts the game.
"Yo man what the fuck are you doing Four?" Amar yells at them.
Four gets off Eric and offers his hand to him with a smirk. "Sorry Amar".
They resume the game again and Four is being aggressive again. He gives Eric a cold shoulder as they speed past the field all throughout with the ball. The game ends up being full of struggle and a lot of strains. Eric is in a bad mood by the end of the practice as he goes straight into the building to change. I get it that he is pretty good at everything getting a scholarship concession and whatever the fuck to get into Dauntless High. But Four is our star quarterback. No one is as good as him. At least not anyone I have met. He is almost at the top of the class and he is the heartthrob of the school. He is okay to deal with when you are friends with him. You have no legit shit to talk about or you are enemies with him. He is going to make your life hell. And in here i felt it was the latter case. Now Four and Eric were officially enemies. It was too obvious.
I hear the shower go off as I wait outside the girls changing room for Christina.
She comes out and gives me the way to the shower. It was her turn to shower first today.
"Here you go Tris", She says as she leaves to change into her clothes.
As I continue showering, my mind starts reviewing the day. Phew. It was tough today. Eric never said anything to him even after they had their little thing on the field. He left with his car after he had showered. Four, as always had lingered on for practice. No wonder he is that good. I get out of the shower and we all get ready to get to our respective cars.
Zeke and Shauna had to go together today and Chris and Will had to go together.
As we all part ways in the parking lot I realise I had left my wallet in the girls locker room. As I get back to the locker room, I hear Four talk to Zeke in the boys locker room on my way.
Wait, wasn't Zeke like with Shauna a moment ago.
I leap towards the edge of the room trying to hide towards the side.
"Bro she sent me in again to talk to you. I told her it was nothing and you don't like to talk about your family." I hear Zeke say.
Apparently Shauna seems to be upset at Four for behaving towards Eric aggressively.
"Zeke he is a d*ck. Did you not see that. He knew that my father was in the government and he rubbed of his house 'that he apparently bought himself' on me just because my father is fucking rich. What does he think of himself. It is not like we are eating out off our parents money in everything" Four says.
"Bruh you sure you mad about that" Zeke asks a bit sceptical.
Four sighs, " Of course I am."
" Look I am not doing this because Shauna is my girlfriend or anything and she told me to come and talk. I am doing this because you're my friend and I need to make sure you're okay. You came off a bit aggressive today man."
"Well you like him, why not be his friend instead."
"Four I am not being his friend. Friends care for each other they tell each other stuff which you clearly aren't. And I damn care about you and I hate that asshole who did what he did today. But you know what, best friends are supposed to know what each of them are going through. And I know that there's more to this. It is not just the money comment that ticked you off, was it. You're so full of shit for not letting me in. Imm trying my best you know. " he huffs." I know there is something else that bothered you today and come and tell me that when you really feel that we are friends. " I hear footsteps and Zeke storms out of the room not even noticing me against the other wall in the opposite direction.
I keep put in my place for a second. As I stand in the corner and breathe in deeply absorbing all the conversation.
I try to step around the area to leave whan Four appears at the door sighing to himself, his bag in his hand.
As I try to move back to my hiding spot, I hear him say, "Tris is that you."
I turn around gingerly. Closing my eyes afraid to meet an angry face.
He chuckles, "Oh god open your eyes".
I take a deep breath as I drink him in, he looks... Umm, I know I shouldn't say this but he fucking looks yummy
He wears a casual hooded muscle tee with his grey shorts on, sunglasses hanging off his hoodie. His arms flex a but as he tightens his hold onto his bag.
"What are you doing here?" he asks.
Just so you know, my mind is completely incoherent of making up any thoughts right now, with him looking like that. Four... NEVER wears something so exposing.
... Or maybe just not in front of me. I eye him and try to piece up a sentence,
"Umm... I uh waas just going to get my wallet..." I try to walk past him coolly "which I accidently left in the locker room".
As I pass him, I feel him turn. A musky scent and a metal scent invading my senses.
"Tris! Do you umm... Maybe like have a ride home?"
"Yeh I came in my car.", I shift from foot to foot. "I should... Go" I awkwardly pointed towards the direction of the girls room as I move towards there.
I stop short suddenly. Remembering Zeke's words.
I know there is something else that bothered you today and come and tell me that when you really feel that we are friends.
"Four are you okay" It comes out as a whisper.
I thought he did not hear that. And i was glad for a moment but... He did. He heard it and he sucked a breath in.
"You heard?" we both know Zeke was talking about today. The way he tensed around Eric, the way he became aggressive. I know maybe I was to blame. But I never want to accept that.
"I am sorry." he doesn't reply.
"Four listen to me. I never meant to -" I start.
"If you didnt mean to you would never want sneak away like that." he says nodding his head.
I have no answer to that. Because I had lied and it was clear now.
"It has changed hasn't it?" he says. "We believed and we tried to not... But it did."
"Why were you angry at Eric, Four?" I ask.
"Maybe you should know that better." he says.
He has the first time openly said ut in words... Directly of the situation between us since Friday night.
"Four I am trying my best to not let things change... But you know It is a FACT that it does."
He looks away as if to dodge the subject.
"Was it that obvious today... With Eric?" he asks.
I kind of nod my head to the sideways.
"You like him a lot don't you?"he asks.
" I mean, he is cute but... It is just a try. We both need to be comfortable. " he says nothing," Four, you shouldn't have pushed him" I whisper
"I did not push him. He came in my way and I just shoved him aside. Now you're lowkey defending him." he smiles a little. "I am too fucked up aren't I?"
"I am not trying to defend him. We are not dating. He was pushing it today. I don't even know if this will work out."
"Why me TRIS?"
"A few months ago I thought life was all about finding... The One for you. But apparently that only exists in fairytale and romcoms. They look good on screen real life is fucked up. For everyone. In one way or the other. And i thought. We have already done it. We both are the same. Fucked yp a bit in our own ways. Who could I even trust more than you then. "
" You trust me?"by this time we are closer. Standing close. Just not close enough. So I lean up and kiss his cheek only to pull back and find him biting his lip.
" Yes I do. " I whisper looking him in the eye. Sincerely his stare back at me.
I see they are wet. Moisture collecting at the end. I just want to kiss his tears away. I have never seen him this... Vulnerable.
"You don't know me" he places his hands on both my cheeks. Holding my face to his. "I can't open up, and I don't think I ever will Tris." he takes ina breath. "You can be happier. With Eric" then the first tear slides out. All moisture disappearing again. He is closing off. "I do fucked up things because I am lost. Sex... It has always been a distraction to me."
"let it be your distraction and let it be my discovery" I whisper.
"But I am not the one for you Tris. It will all be messed up"
"I don't want open up. You don't have let me in. I just trust you." I say. Something shifts between us. The energy. Heating up the place. I turn around just because I can't take it anymore. His hands which were earlier on my face fall to his sides. I try to walk away but i feel him grip my wrists. Hard. Rough. But Surprisingly. I like this rough. This touch even though it may leave behind marks.
He pulls me back and pulls my face in roughly placing his hand on the back of my head. His hands tangle in my hair, the other one still holding my wrist.
In a flash, I am in heaven. His lips on mine. Flush against mine. He kisses me rough this time. As I said. I like this toughness coming from him. He applies pressure, his hand loosening and his attention all on my lips, I turn around his other hand sliding onto my hips. Gripping it in place. Holding Me down while I think I might pass out. He tastes... Soo good. Numbing my senses. His tongue thrusts into mine. I kiss him back hard. My back arching I push into him further. His hand going to my ass the other one massaging on my scalp.
I push him towards the door it rolls back into place as we stumble in.
He finally pulls back. Looking at me. Fire in his eyes.
"It will be fine." he says. Determined. I smile a little.
"I'll get this changed then we will go home okay" he says pointing to his muscle tee.
"No" I pull him back holding his shirt in my hand "I like it."
He keeps staring at me for a second and there is a complete shift in the atmosphere around.
"Fuck going home" his voice is hoarse as hell.
*️️️*
MATURE CONTENT AHEAD:SEXUAL
READ AT YOUR OWN RISK
.
His lips crash into mine. As we stumble deeper into the locker room towards the showers. I know where it is going and I know what I want our of it.
I pull him closer as his tongue leaves my lips to my neck tracing along the jawline, I close my eyes in ecstacy and crave for air as he leaves me breathless.
"Four, the room" I manage to squeak out between my laboured breath and panting.
"No one will come" he pauses to speak against my skin as his hand reaches behind to latch the door.
He turns his attention to my ear as he nibbles on it. I can't take it anymore so I pull him back to my face kissing his jawline and sicking on his throat alternatively.
His hands wander to the hem of my top as he slips a hand inside to feel the clip of the bra. He undoes it first leaving my shirt on. I push him back a bit finding with his belt on his stomach well aware of his shirt limit of his.
"Shirt" he says. As he flungs his hand under the shirt along my curves up to the bra and tugs at it. We pause and break apart as I get my shirt off and through it somewhere in there in the shower room. I have my bra hanging loosely as his hands push aside one of the cups and his mouth kisses down my neck. I get my bra off completely just in time for him to suck in a breath and paying attention to my face as his hands kneed my bouncy beasts. They have gotten quiet big since the past two years.
All that can be heard in here are moans and grunts as I slip my hand to undo my shorts doing the same to him. He gives me space to get out of them as he gets his Bermudas off and throws it somewhere behind us. The wall is still wet with droplets of water on them. Indicating that someone had showered in here a few minutes ago. He pulls away a little and he looks at me saying restlessly, "We are going to do it your way." my hands grab his ass as I fall into his chest and turn us around so that my back is facing the wall and he is almost on top of me. I pull down my panties and one of my legs wraps around his as my hands dip to pull down his boxers.
" Off"
He steps back and pulls down his boxers giving a pleasant view of... Well you know what.
"Okay it is going to hurt a bit... It is just the second time." he says his lips on mine moving against them.
His mouth goes back on my lips trailing a line of kisses down to my breast. He kisses around my breast over the exposed skin as he avoids the nipples. Fuck you Four.
He is such a tease." Mouth on me" I pant out as his lips go round and round all around my breast. Still avoiding the nipples.
"Fuck. FOUR!" I yell out as he pulls me up a bit. Hoisting me a bit higher me on his thighs. His lips latch to my nipples as he kissed the hell out of me.
I put my hands around his neck, burying my head into the crook of his neck and I gently bite his skin there and am honoured when he hisses into my ear. I climb up further higher and align myself with him. "Okay go, fast" I say breathlessly.
AND then it happens... In rhythm. I buck my hips with his, both of us setting the pace fast and hard. Unlike the last time, this is hurried. And hot. Heat swaps into me as he pounds against my entrance. I put my head back in pleasure and close my eyes. All that can be heard is a lot of moaning and a lot of grunts.
As I reach my edge I know it was all going to end.i can feel him on the edge too. As he empties into the condom and I feel my back muscles relax against the dew drop wall. He buries his head between my breasts, breathing hard.
I sigh into his hair which I had been pulling at wildly and relax my head against his hair.
"wow" I hear his say against my skin.
*️️️*
MATURE CONTENT ENDS:SEXUAL
I DID WARN YOU
"Well, that was something" I chuckle.
He pulls me down and we both dress up. As he tries to get out of the shower i hold him to stop.
"Four, we are doing this right" I ask.
He smiles getting a huge ass smile out of me as well.
I get my hand in a shaking position as we give it a curt handshake.
"No commitment, no sorry's.."
"no thank you''s, no attachment" he continues.
"No forcing,..."
" Agreed mutual liking, agreed clauses stand"
"Just sex." I complete.
"Deal" he smirks a bit.
"Deal"
It was on. A distraction for him and a discovery for me.
(AN: Well that was something. Okay so I wanted to apologise for not updating earlier. This si actually 2 chs together. So extra long)