A/N Hello hello! I hope you all are doing well. I am so happy to say that since being published mid-March, this story has reached 35,000 views! I want to take a moment to thank each and every one of you who has taken the time to read my work.

I am also sad to say that there are only 5 chapters left! I wrote the last one last week and had myself a little cry after.

Anyways, onto the story. I hope you all enjoy it, and a special thank you to TheLittleSubmissive for looking over this chapter for me. If you haven't checked out her writing, do so. She is amazing!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

To say that I was excited was an understatement as Dimitri and I stand outside of Adrian's townhouse to pick up the kids. Dr. Sloan discharged me and gave me care instructions for my burns, along with prescribing me a sleep aid for the nightmares that came back. Sydney opens the door with a large smile and steps aside to let me in.

"I'm glad you're ok," I say as I hug Sydney tightly. Sydney nods against my shoulder and hugs me back and pulls away.

"Alright, get in there. They both have been fussy all morning."

I smirk and walk into the living room where Adrian is sitting with the twins, Artyom in Adrian's lap and Nadia in the swing next to them. Adrian looks like he is playing patty cake with Artyom but looks up at us as we walk in. Artyom whines when Adrian stops clapping his little hands together and looks up but catches me in his gaze and starts to squirm. I step over the cluster of toys and pick up Artyom as he lets out a garbled shriek and hold him tightly to my chest, breathing in his intoxicating smell. Pressing my lips against his head, I lean down and unbuckle Nadia with one hand. I lift her from the swing and hold her to my chest as well. Dimitri lets me be for a few minutes as I hold my squirming babies and I breathe them in deeply. God, I missed them terribly. I move to sit on the couch behind me and adjust the two in my arms, reclining back so that they are partly laying against my chest.

I run my fingers through Nadia's curls as she sucks away at her thumb and look up at the remaining adults in the room. "You must be the baby whisperer; nobody could calm them while you were gone. Hell, the only ones who could get them to stop crying were Dimitri and Tatiana," Sydney says as she sits down on the coffee table in front of me.

The idea of Tatiana holding one of my children seems odd as I never viewed her in any way as maternal, but then again, they are her family as well. Dimitri sits down next to me and lays his arm against the top of the couch, stroking my matted hair that I have thrown up in a bun. I cannot wait to bathe when we get home. I feel disgusting.

I give Adrian and Sydney an appreciative smile. "Thank you for what you've done to help with the kids and thank you for sneaking into my hospital room to heal me. It is really appreciated, but I don't want you to put stress on yourself," I say and give a pointed look at Adrian. He shrugs and rests his hand on Sydney's shoulder.

"It was nothing. Lissa and I would have done more if we could reach all of our magic. I'm just glad that you are home and ok," Adrian says. I nod and look down to find both babies asleep and I run my fingers through their hair affectionately. I lean my head against Dimitri's shoulder and sit contently with my loved ones with the calming weight on my chest.

The sheets beneath me were silk and soft, and it contributed to the euphoric feeling spreading through my body. I sighed contently at the feeling of his tongue, teeth and lips against my neck, whimpering wantonly in his embrace. His hands skimmed up my leg, lifting the skirt of my dress to my hip and kneaded my thigh roughly.

"Please," I whimpered as I arched my body closer to him as much as I could, but he growled and pushed me further into the mattress. I moaned as my grip slackened in his hair and my arm dropped to the bed as my body started to go limp.

"Let me awaken you," he whispered in my ear, licking my earlobe and I shivered slightly. His weight came off my body a little and I opened my eyes to look up at him, my mind hazing from the endorphins of his bite. I shook my head and tried to catch my breath.

"Rose."

"I want to think about it some more," I murmured. He didn't like that answer. His hands wrapped around my throat as he put his full weight back on my body, pinning me to the mattress again. He shifted and straddled my hips as I feebly clawed at his hands with tears streaming down my face.

I tried to wiggle out of his grip, gagging and whimpering in fear. "You're out of time Roza," he said, pushing down on my throat to the point where I felt it snap.

I bolt upright in bed as a hand touches my chest and a small scream leaves my lips and I flinch back out of bed onto the floor. I reach my hand up to my throat and stroke the skin frantically, looking for any tenderness and flinch again as another larger hand places itself on my shoulder. A sob breaks through my mouth and arms wrap around me, pulling me gently to their chest.

"Shh, it was just a dream. You're safe Roza," Dimitri crooned into my hair, rubbing my arms. I clutch his shirt tightly in my hands and press my face into his chest to try and comfort myself.

"I thought the medication was helping with the nightmares," he murmurs to himself and lifts me from the floor. Dimitri lays down in the middle of our bed and holds me tightly to him, kissing my head and running his hands over my back in soothing circles.

After a few minutes, I finally get my breathing back to normal and my tears stop. I look up at Dimitri, searching his worried brown eyes and let out a relieved breath. I reach up and run my fingers along his cheek.

"I'm sorry I woke you," I whisper, and he shakes his head at me.

"It's ok. That must have been a bad one. I was shaking you for a few minutes because you were screaming in your sleep."

I nod and tuck my head under his chin and wrap myself around his body as tightly as I can. Dimitri pulls my hair out of the elastic and runs his fingers through it, unravelling the curls and massaging my scalp.

"I was back at the estate," I whisper.

Dimitri takes a slow breath and presses a kiss to my head. "Do you want to talk about it?" he asks sullenly. I swallow and lean my head back and look up at him.

"Not right now, Baby."

Dimitri nods and kisses my nose lightly as I close my eyes, trying to fall back asleep. About an hour later, I'm still awake, curled into Dimitri so I carefully crawl out of bed and walk into the kitchen. I fill the kettle and turn it on to boil as I give some tea from the cupboard and wait. Hoping that the tea will help me sleep, I wander into the living room and sit down on the couch. I sip on the tea and lean into the couch, trying to keep the memory of the nightmare away but failing miserably. I set the cup down and walk to the bookshelf, skimming through the books until I land on the one I desire the most. Finding it and grabbing a pen from the coffee table, I sit back down and write in the journal I got from Dr. Carson a year ago.

By the time that I finish pouring my soul into the pages of this book, my tea has grown cold and I can hear Artyom making noise in his crib. Looking at the handful of pages that are inked with the inner turmoil of the last few weeks, I set it on the table and go to collect Artyom. I peek into Nadia's crib to find her still asleep, so I smile down at my wide-awake little boy and lift him from the crib to change his bottom. Artyom has such a sweet smile, and he lays quietly as I snap his pajamas close and take him out to the living room with me.

I lay him on his rug while I get a bottle ready for him. I stopped breastfeeding when I went back to work, but the minute he lays on my chest when he is hungry he starts to root, looking for my cleavage, but I rub the nipple of the bottle over his lip and he takes it happily.

On the nights when my mind is particularly cruel to me and plays the memories of being trapped in the estate with Strigoi Dimitri, I wish that the attack on the academy never happened and that Dimitri would never have been turned. But without those heartbreaking events, I wouldn't have the things I do now. I wouldn't have my children, and in the light of day, that makes the pain worth it.

I pat Artyom's back as my eyes start to droop and wipe his mouth with the towel on the coffee table. I lay down on the couch and place Artyom on my chest, rubbing my hand over his back in circles as he falls back to sleep.

The small weight on my chest is being removed and my eyes snap open to see my mom standing over me with Artyom in her arms. I blink a few times and I can hear that the house is up and about, so I sit up and rub my hand over my face.

"Good morning Rosemarie," Mom says as she bounces Artyom in her arms. "And good morning to you, my handsome little man! Let's go change your bottom while Momma gets ready," Mom adds as she walks out of the living room. I stand up from the couch and wander into my bedroom, bumping into Dimitri as he walks out with Nadia.

I place my hands on his arms to steady myself and smile sweetly at Nadia. I press multiple kisses to her cheek and stretch up to kiss Dimitri as I step around them. I fish around in my closet for clothes to wear and pull out a grey knit dress and lay it on the bed before I go for my shower. I wash my hair quickly and secure it up in a bun as I get dressed. I groan when the dress doesn't cover the scarring on my chest. I look through the closet and dressers, looking for a scarf that I can wrap around my neck and come across the scarf Abe gave to me when I left Russia the first time. I rub the cashmere between my fingers before wrapping it around and adjust it in the mirror.

Deeming the outfit appropriate for work, I slip on a pair of heels and collect my things. In the kitchen I can hear my mom and Dimitri chatting, the children in the playpen. Dimitri looks up as I approach and he stands, wrapping an arm around my waist and pressing his lips to mine. The kiss lasts a little longer than a kiss normally would in front of my mom, but he pulls back and runs his eyes over my face before moving to pour me a coffee.

I lean over to hug my mom quickly and take the mug from Dimitri and sip the brewed drink. "Dimitri says the medication isn't working?"

I sip my coffee and flick my eyes over to him. Dimitri looks slightly guilty and rubs the back of his neck. "I'm fine," I say bluntly and Mom raises her brow at me. Taking my bristle attitude as a sign that I don't want to talk about it, Mom changes the subject and brings up the trial.

The talk of the trial makes my hair stand on edge. Tatiana made it clear to me that I was going to have to testify, but the thought of Tasha makes me uneasy. I don't want to see her, and I don't even want to be in the same room as her. I know that my testimony is vital for the case against her, but it's going to take a lot for me to be comfortable being in the courtroom with her.

I'm not surprised my mom brought it up, given that the trial is in three weeks. Any time it was brought up, Dimitri became uneasy as well. "Can we talk about something else? Please? I just want a break from all of this," I exclaim as I set my cup down in the sink, whirling around to face Mom.

Mom nods her head and looks down at her watch. "You two better get going, you're going to be late." I nod and walk over to the playpen, leaning down to kiss my babies goodbye and telling them to be good for Nana.

Dimitri is tense beside me as we walk towards the palace, so I slip my hand into his and squeeze it gently. Dimitri turns his head to look down at me and squeezes mine back before letting go and wrapping his arm around my waist. "I've never seen that scarf before," Dimitri comments as we walk through the lobby and he puts a small amount of distance between us. I reach up and touch the scarf with a small smile.

"Abe gave it to me," I say, and he looks me over with a grin. "It's beautiful."

Tatiana's assistant was waiting for us in the office and opened the door for us, ushering us in and Lissa and I started the meeting with Tatiana. It was trivial and was more for Lissa, but I need to know some of this. My head isn't really in it today, my mind lingering over the nightmare from last night and the trial. I'm so wrapped up in my thoughts that I don't realize I'm being spoken to until Tatiana snaps her fingers at me.

"Rosemarie."

I jolt out of my thoughts and look at her. "I'm sorry, what did you say?"

Tatiana sighs and places her hands in her lap and tilts her head as she looks at me. "What's on your mind?" she asks and I shake my head at her.

"It's nothing."

"It's not nothing if you are losing focus mid-conversation," Tatiana says. I look at Lissa and back at Tatiana with a shrug.

"I just didn't sleep well last night," I explain and she looks at me with a nod before looking around the room at the Guardians in the room.

"Leave us please," Tatiana says to the Guardians and they all move from the room, Dimitri lingering at the end of the group. He gives me a small smile before exiting. I shift in my seat, knowing that Tatiana is going to want me to elaborate, but I haven't told Dimitri about the content of the nightmares.

I take a long sip of my tea as I observe Tatiana and she sits patiently, looking at me regally while she waits for me to elaborate. "I keep having mixed nightmares. Times from when Dimitri was Strigoi, to being back in that basement, sometimes they morph into something different. The one last night was pretty bad," I say quietly and Lissa takes my hand in a comforting gesture.

"Are they getting more frequent the closer we get to the trial?"

I nod and gnaw at my lip. I hate admitting that the nightmares are back, but they are making me exhausted and agitated. I don't want to talk about it to Dimitri because I know that he himself still has nightmares about his time as a Strigoi, and if I told him I was still having nightmares about it that he would feel guilty. "Would it be beneficial if you started talking to Dr. Carson again?" Lissa asks and I shrug, not sure if it will help.

I sit and think Lissa's suggestion over again and think that it might work. If writing in my journal gave me some relief this morning for me to go back to sleep, maybe I should go and see him.

I made an appointment and met with Dr. Carson later that day, and we spent over an hour discussing the dreams and my overall anxiety. A big anxiety factor was the way my skin looked now, and I was skittish when it came to Dimitri looking at my marred skin. The small patches I could get over, but the big one on my chest I've become self-conscious about. The scar started at the middle of my breastbone and dipped between my breasts, roughly three inches wide. It was large and a shade lighter than the rest of my skin, so it stood out like a beacon.

On top of not letting him look at me, I have been pushing him away intimately. The last time we were intimate was before Tasha abducted me and that was almost two months ago. Sure, we would lay cuddled together in bed or on the couch, exchanging kisses and gently touches, but that was the extent of it.

If Dimitri has started to notice that I am apprehensive about him looking at me, he has been gracious not to mention it. Until now.

I rest my hands against the tiles of the shower as I let the hot water roll down my back. I have spent the last hour in the gym taking some of my frustration out on a heavy bag, and my muscles are in dire need of release. I tilt my face up towards the water and close my eyes, taking a calming breath through my mouth when the door opens. I tense up a little as Dimitri steps in behind me and wraps his arms around my waist.

Dimitri pulls me back to his chest and rests his face in my shoulder, splaying his hands over my stomach and chest. I close my eyes and tilt my head back, trying to punch down the anxiety of him touching me; he's my fiancé for god sake. Dimitri kisses my shoulder before moving his lip up to my neck and then places a final kiss on my cheek, his lips brushing against my skin. I shiver in his arms and he spins me around to face him. I look down at our feet, feeling slightly ashamed that I can't look him in the eyes, but he cups my chin and brings my face up to look at him.

"Do you remember what I told you the night before you went into labour?" he asks quietly and I nod my head. "What did I tell you?"

I bite my lip and look away from him, but he grips my chin again and turns me to face him again, his eyes kind and loving. "You told me that I am the most beautiful woman you ever met, and nothing will ever change that," I say quietly. Dimitri nods his head at me and pulls me closer to him, our chests brushing together. His hands rest on my tailbone.

"That still stands now, Roza. You are beautiful; inside and out. Nothing is going to change how attracted I am to you. Stop hiding yourself from me. Talk to me, let me in," he pleads. My lip starts to quiver, and I choke out a small sob. Dimitri always knows what to say to get me to come out of my shell, and he knows when I need to hear it. I wrap my arms around his neck and press my face into his chest as his hand runs up my back and into my hair. He rocks me gently as he consoles me and kisses my head while he whispers sweet nothings. I lift my head up and brush my lips against his, stretching onto the tips of my toes.

Obviously, Dimitri is unsatisfied with our position and lifts me up, wrapping my legs around his hips and pressing me gently into the wall. There is not lust or primal desire in his eyes, just compassion and love. He presses kisses to both of my cheeks and then both sides of my neck slowly, travelling down my neck to my chest. He stops just above the scar and looks up at me, looking me in the eyes as he presses his lips to the center of the scar. He lingers there for a bit, kissing the whole scar slowly and tenderly while my heart gallops in my chest. Dimitri isn't looking at me in disgust or pity. He is looking at me with adoration, and I can feel the heaviness in my body slowly lift.

"I love you. No scars will change that," he whispers against my skin, kissing his way to my shoulder. I hum in response, my mind completely focused on the feeling of his lips on me and the heat of the water pouring down around us. Dimitri rests his lips against the curve of my shoulder, rubbing his thumbs against the skin of my thighs.

I run my fingers through his wet hair and wrap them in the ends of his silky locks. I tug gently on them and he lifts his head up, his eyes swimming with adulation. I tilt my head down to catch his lips in mine and we move them together softly, drawing each other in with every breath and caress. The water in the shower has run cold but all I can feel is the heat of his body against mine. Dimitri moves a hand from my legs up to my waist, running his thumb under the swell of my breast and I shiver in his hands. I run my fingers over the marks on the back of his neck and smile as he sighs at my touch, squeezing my leg and pulling us both away from the cold, wet tile.

Dimitri doesn't let me go until we are out of the shower and sets me down on the counter before reaching back into the shower to turn off the water. The cooling water makes my skin pucker and I move to get off the counter, but Dimitri stops me by wrapping a soft towel around me, drying my skin tenderly. "Thank you," I say quietly.

Dimitri's gaze flicks up to my eyes and a small smile crosses his lips. "What for?" he asks. I reach out and grasp his hand and pull him closer to me.

"For taking care of me. You've been doing a lot of that lately," I sigh. Dimitri wraps his arms around me, and I rest my head against his chest while pressing kisses on his skin. Dimitri strokes his fingers through my tangled, wet hair and presses kisses to my head. I unwrap the towel from my shoulders and rub it over any part of his skin that I can reach, watching goosebumps rise in the wake of the friction of the towel.

I slide off the counter to continue my ministrations before tossing it over the rack and tugging Dimitri towards the bedroom. I climb into bed and crock my finger at him to join which he does and wraps himself around me under the blankets. I rest my head against his chest and my eyes fall on the pale mark over his heart. I brush my fingers over the scar and Dimitri's hand catches my own and he brings mine up to his lips, holding it there for a few moments before placing our hands back on his chest. I shift in his arms enough to press my lips to his scar and look up at him with a small smile.

While his scar isn't large, it stands out against his skin and I know that it is a reminder of what he has overcome to him. I hope that someday I can get to the point where I see my scars and not shy away from them.

"When did it get easier to look at this?" I ask as I rub my fingers over his chest. Dimitri turns his head and rests his chin on my hair, his thumb strumming across my knuckles.

"When I learned that it wasn't my fault. Being a Strigoi, and the things that I had done. You told me over and over that I was just as much of a victim as the people I hurt. Once I accepted that it became easier to look at. Now I look at it as a reminder of what I get to have now. I get to have my beautiful fiancé and two gorgeous children. And it's because of you."

I smile into his chest and wrap my leg around his, getting comfortable in his arms and closing my eyes to the sound of his beating heart beneath my ear.

In the night, I must have shifted in my sleep because when I wake, I'm facing my clock instead of Dimitri. The heat radiating around me is perfect and I look to the clock to see that I am awake earlier than I should be. I sigh and close my eyes again when I feel Dimitri's soft lips pressing against the nape of my neck, caressing my marks and scars. I wiggle my butt against his arousal to let him know I'm awake, and he groans quietly, moving a hand to my hip and squeezing tightly.

"How long have you been awake?" I giggle as he moves his lips up to my ear. The arms he has wrapped around me tighten and he pulls me closer to his body. Dimitri's breath flutters across my ear and I press myself further against him, smirking when his breath becomes shaky.

"Not long," he whispers, his hand kneading my skin tenderly and rocking himself against me. I move around in his arms to face him and slide my hands over his body, chasing his lips with mine. I sigh against his lips as his hand travels down my back and pulls my leg up to rest on top of his. I suck his lip into my mouth as he squeezes my ass, making me moan into his mouth.

I let go of his lip and press another kiss to his lips. "I've kind of neglected your needs haven't I," I whisper, and Dimitri pulls away enough to look me in the eyes. He strokes my cheek softly while shaking his head.

"No. No, you haven't. You've needed to focus on your health and healing after what happened. I am happy to wait as long as necessary until you are ready," he says and leans in to brush my lips against his. I wrap my arm around his neck and roll both of us over, pulling him down on top of me. I wrap my leg tightly around him and run my fingers over his shoulders, commanding dominance over his lips as he rests on his arms to keep his full weight off of me.

"Roza – Rose stop," Dimitri says, pulling his lips from mine. "You don't need to take care of me because you feel like you've neglected me."

I raise my brows at him and pull him back down on top of me, his full weight crashing down on me and I savour the feeling. I quickly wrap my other leg around him and press kisses to his neck. "I'm not doing this to 'take care of you', I'm doing it because I want to make love to you," I say bluntly and I let Dimitri rise up on his arms enough to look at me. I watch him search my face for uncertainty before he leans down and kisses me firmly, running his tongue along the seam of my lips.

I run my fingers down the muscles of his back and clutch at the firm skin on his ass, pulling him closer to me as I rock up against him. Dimitri peppers my neck with kisses as he moves down my body, leaving a long kiss on the marred skin at the center of my breasts. He places multiple loving kisses there before moving down my body, stopping at every scar and mark before coming back up to claim my lips again.

Until morning, we can stay here in this small bubble and we can both forget the events that have consumed us for the last year.