Chapter 26
Lexa had been deep in thought for most of the night, finding little sleep at all. She only drifted off some time before the sun rose.
So, once the little girl shifting next to her, finally woke her, Lexa still felt tired and all of the endless thoughts had given her a headache.
She had not been able to come up with a logical explanation as to what had happened yesterday. While she had been mussing over the events, the little blonde child had been sleeping peacefully. Once she had joined Marie in the bed, the girl seemed to have woken to some degree and almost instinctually had crawled her way onto the commander's chest, settling there with her thumb still between her pouty lips. She had only put her arms around the girl, keeping hold of her gently, feeling the echo of her little heart beating faintly against her own chest and it had seemed for a moment as if their hearts had been beating in sync.
Lexa had softly caressed over the girl's back, soothing her once again into a deeper sleep.
Although she had not been able to understand what really had happened, Lexa was firm in her internal decision that the child needed her protection now more than ever. If this weird talent of her became public, the child would be sought out in the thirst of power by the other leaders and she did not wish to imagine what would happen to the innocent girl then.
She did not know what fates had brought them together, but somehow the little girl seemed to her like a personal gift from the stars, fulfilling a deep longing, even she had not been consciously aware of. Lexa internally wondered if Costia could have somehow sent her the innocent child, but it did not really matter. She was thankful for having Marie within her life now and she knew that her own life would certainly be a little more complicated from now on, but she was convinced that it was worth it.
Lexa finally opened her eyes, when the child's shifting became more prominent and she was not sure yet if Marie had woken up or might be falling into troubled sleep. It turned out that the girl was awake and confused grey eyes looked up at her, when Lexa looked down.
Lexa gave the girl a soft smile, internally hoping that Marie was not upset still from last night. "Good morning, little one" she greeted the child in a gentle tone, finally breaking the silence between them.
Marie who had just mutely been staring at the commander for long moments, blinked once, before she smiled brightly as well, broadcasting the gap between her teeth "You 'live" she proclaimed in a clearly relived tone.
Lexa carefully nodded, inspecting the child quickly. She had been confident that their healers would have been able to make her survive the gunshot wound, but she knew that the possibility of lasting damage to her shoulder had been very real.
The little girl had once again crawled on top of her and hugged her around her neck enthusiastically. Lexa let the girl be with an amused smile for a moment, but she knew that it would not be long before she would be needed outside.
"We need to get up, little one" Lexa said after a long silent moment of simply letting the girl lie on her chest.
Marie made a little noise of protest and hugged the woman's neck a little tighter. She did not want to get up. She wanted to stay in bed with Lexa; they were safe here after all.
Lexa chuckled slightly under her breath. She wished that she could indulge the child and let her sleep, but she knew that she would be needed soon. Her warriors would be eagerly awaiting her orders to finally destroy the invaders.
"You can remain in bed for now if you are not feeling well, little one" Lexa proclaimed after a moment of contemplation. She had no idea what healing her wound could mean to Marie's health and she was internally afraid that there would be repercussions for the little girl.
Marie pouted at the woman. She wanted to stay in bed together and not alone. But her protest was cut off, when Anya entered the tent in that very moment.
Marie startled visibly at the unexpected arrival and her first instinct had been to hide from whoever had entered the tent. So, she borrowed herself firmer against the commander's chest, mutely seeking protection.
Lexa was alarmed by the girl's seemingly frightened reaction. They had been unable to effectively sooth the girl last night and she was internally worried that the child had lost at least some trust in them.
Anya did appear nonplussed by Marie's reaction as well and the general remained standing rooted to the spot a slight distance away from the bed, staring down at Lexa and Marie in confusion for a moment, before guilt visibly flashed over her features. She knew that she had not been uninvolved in scaring the little girl last night after all.
"Little one, it is only Anya" Lexa tried to sooth the child in a soft tone, gently caressing over her back.
Marie needed a few moments to finally lift her head from the commander's chest again, but she still continued to hold onto Lexa's shirt as she tentatively looked up at Anya with unsure grey eyes.
The general tried to give the child a slight smile as well, although her mind was in turmoil. The sight her former second and the little blonde girl gave was heart-warming and there was an innocence within Marie's grey eyes which their own children had already lost at the same age. But she knew, that it would not matter how sweet and soft the child may be if her healing abilities became public.
During the night, she had tried to remember fervently if she had ever heard anything about such an ability before and a few hours into the night, she had finally remembered that she had heard some form of distinct tale from elders in the Desert Nation.
"I have heard a tale about such an unbelievable talent in the Desert Nation" Anya addressed only Lexa now, thinking that it may be best to leave Marie out of the loop of that conversation.
Lexa's relaxed state immediately melted away and was replaced with a mixture of alarm and disbelieve. She was fairly certain that she would have heard about it as well, if this tale was really well known.
Marie tilted her head to the side, as her eyes darted back and forth between Lexa and Anya confusedly. She had not understood much from what the general had just said and both of them very rarely spoke Trigedasleng around her, so, she was naturally curious now due to the change in language.
"Alright, time to get up now, little one" Lexa distracted the girl, before Marie could even open her mouth to ask for a translation. She knew that Marie would need to know as much about her talent as possible, but after last night, she did not wish to unnecessarily worry the child and she knew how much of a burden something like this could be to a child.
Marie frowned for a second, but she would obey the commander's words.
Lexa sat up, keeping gentle hold of the girl still lying on her chest and hoisting the girl's over the edge of the bed and placing her on her feed, before she inclined her head towards the bathing area of the tent, mutely signalling Marie to go ahead and wash herself. Although the girl made an unbelievable mess by the simple task of washing herself, but Marie had been adamant that she could wash herself and it would keep the girl occupied for a moment.
"I cannot remember the details any longer" Anya continued once the child had vanished out of view behind the thin curtain "Has she shown any side effects?" she added a second later. The girl had outwardly appeared alright, but she could still have some side effects of her talent.
Lexa shook her head in the negative. The child had slept peacefully through the night and she had not appeared sick either. "If you remember where exactly or even who has told you this … tale … I can send out someone to investigate discretely".
Anya's lips pressed together in a displeased thin line "I do not remember" she admittedly in a clearly displeased tone. She had continued to try and access the particular memory, but it had remained ominous.
Lexa pinched the bridge of her nose in rising frustration. She had also thought about randomly sending missionaries into the other clans and trying to find out if there was some knowledge about unusual abilities. But she also knew, that such a move would in fact just increase the likelihood of a clever mind catching on that she was hiding something, which would only further put the child into danger.
Her internal musing was cut short, when she caught the child standing in front of the curtain uncertainly. Marie was holding onto the curtain with one chubby fist, gnawing slightly on her plump lower lip and fidgeting in place as she was staring at them in utter silence.
Lexa smiled at the little girl, pushing her worried thoughts as fast away as possible to focus her attention fully on Marie for now.
Marie was still dressed in the oversized shirt, she had been given to sleep in, and her feet were bare. Water droplets still glistened on the child's roundish cheeks and the shirt bore more than just one splash of water on its front, showing just how sloppily the girl must have used the water again to wash herself.
"We should do something about your hair, little one" Lexa assessed with an amused smile. The girl must have tried to comb it somehow, but had obviously forgotten that there had been braids in them. It looked as if she had tried to fix her mistake and just tangled up everything instead.
Marie pouted slightly; she had hoped that Lexa would not notice. Alira had told her to leave her hair alone, but she had wanted to try herself and she could feel that she had just made a mess out of it. She still reached out towards Lexa's offered hand and let herself be led to a chair, sitting down obediently, without saying a single peep. She remembered now that both women had bombarded her with questions and she remembered how scared and confused she had felt. She did not want a repetition of this situation and everything which had happened before that was still weirdly hazy in her mind.
"I have got something for you" Anya proclaimed in a light tone, stepping in front of Marie and crouching down to be on the same level with the child, before she reached into a pocket of her coat and pulled out her present.
Marie's grey eyes lost their residual caution and confusion and now shone with joy, as she recognized a sort of toy in the general's hands. "You got me a plushie!" she squealed excitedly, nearly jumping up and down on the chair in ecstasy.
Lexa raised a brow at her former mentor, taking a little step back from the child. Now that Marie was moving around so nervously, it was impossible to comb her hair out for now. "Why don't you take it?" she questioned the child with an amused smile. Although Marie was clearly overjoyed with the present, she had not reached out to make a grab for it. She was internally a little confused though as to why Anya had brought this toy; the general had not been a fan of games and toys when she had resided with her.
Marie threw a slightly startled glance over her shoulder for a second, before her grey eyes returned to the toy within Anya's hand and she tentatively reached out.
"It does not bite" Anya assured the child half seriously, as she held it closer to Marie.
Marie finally closed her fingers around the toy, feeling its soft texture with an amazed expression on her roundish features "It's soooooo soft" she exclaimed in a high-pitched tone.
"All right, sit still for a moment now, little one" Lexa gently tapped on the child's shoulders to prompt her to sit down again "You can inspect it while sitting as well".
"It's wolf" Marie retorted in an informative tone.
Anya was confused at the seemingly out of the blue words and connected her gaze with Lexa's, but the younger woman appeared as confused as she felt.
Marie noticed the open question on the general's face and she held up the plushie towards the woman in explanation "Wolf" she exclaimed again.
"Yes" Anya agreed in a cautious tone "It is indeed a wolf" she added slowly, still not understanding exactly what the girl meant.
"No" Marie retorted with a slight shake of her head, prompting Lexa to huff under her breath at being interrupted again "It's name's Wolf" she explained, holding up the toy for another moment, before she cradled it to her chest.
Anya snorted under her breath, biting back a laugh at the girl's serious expression. If she wanted to name the toy with something, she could have at least chosen a name, but she would not lecture the girl on that now. "And a very fine one Wolf is" she agreed, humouring the child gently.
Marie smiled brighter again, remembering in the last second not to nod in agreement now.
Lexa finally had combed out the last stubborn out of the child's blonde locks. She had no idea how Marie had even managed to tangle them up like that in such a short time, but everything was in order again now.
"I will call for breakfast" Anya offered in that moment.
Lexa gave her former mentor a slight nod in agreement, before she stepped away from the table. She quickly washed herself, before she returned. Marie was still sitting on the stool and she seemed to be speaking softly to her new toy, too low though, for Lexa to pick up any words.
"Time to get dressed, little one" she proclaimed softly, after having watched the girl with her toy in silence for a long moment.
Marie nodded immediately, jumping down from the stool a little too enthusiastically and Lexa was glad that she was standing close enough, that she just needed to quickly reach out and steady the little girl as she was clearly losing her balance.
"Ops" Marie exclaimed with an innocent smile.
Lexa slightly shook her head in amusement at the girl.
"Can I d'ess like you?" Marie asked excitedly as an idea sprung through her mind.
Lexa furrowed her brow "You mean in clothes like mine?" she checked just to make sure that she had gotten Marie's question correct. When the girl immediately nodded with a hopeful smile, Lexa sighed under her breath. She knew that she should not let Marie play around like that, but as the girl's smile faltered, Lexa felt her resistance melt away and she asked "What did you have in mind, little mind?" as an offer and as Marie's features lightened up again, she quickly added a restriction "And only within this tent".
Marie nodded along, not caring about the restriction. She knew that she would not fit into the actual armour, but she was fascinated with the red cape and the one glove. "The 'ed cape and you' glove" she proclaimed chirpily, looking up at the commander with shining grey eyes.
Lexa chuckled under her breath "It is called a "sash", little one, not a cape" she corrected the girl gently. She knew that Titus would likely have a stroke, if he ever saw Marie wearing the regalia of the commander, but she was certain that there was no damage in letting the child have what she wanted in the privacy of their tent.
So, a few minutes later, when Anya returned to the commander's tent with a tray laden fully with breakfast for all of them, Lexa was already sitting at the table.
Marie was sitting on the commander's lap, wrapped up in the commander's red sash. With one arm she had Wolf cradled to her chest and she was moving the other hand in front of her face in clear amazement. Lexa's glove was clearly way too big in size for the child's small hands, but Marie was obviously completely fascinated with the metal imitating the bones and she continued to move her hand around, letting the light catch on the shiny metal.
Anya looked dumbfounded at the sight which had greeted her, but she did not voice her internal protest. She had been involved deep enough in Lexa's upbringing to know very well, that what her former second was letting the girl do right now, would be considered almost as blasphemy by the flamekeepers. But she also had to agree that the child looked even cuter in her dress up, sitting on Lexa's lap with the toy in her arms.
As she placed the tray with breakfast onto the table, Anya was internally astonished of the apparent change within Lexa. She had not seen the young leader as relaxed and almost carefree as she appeared now. Her green eyes were shining with a newfound determination and although she knew that the addition of Marie in Lexa's life would not make the commander's life any easier or safer, the child's presence was obviously already having a huge impact on Lexa and she was glad for it.
"Now I'm comma'de" Marie proclaimed in her childish tone, sitting up the slightest bit straighter, as she smiled up at Anya innocently.
"And what a great commander you will be" Anya agreed good-naturedly.
Lexa just slightly tightened her arm around the child's midriff. Both of them knew, that Marie would never be commander and it was not something she would wish upon the sweet girl. No, she wanted her to remain a child, something she herself had never been allowed to be.