*I don't own Twilight, it all belongs to Stephenie.*

Jasper blinked forcefully once, twice… Three times. That was all the reaction he showed throughout his father's whole speech. His face was still as blank as when he had started listening to the story, his eyes so devoided of emotion that Carlisle was scared.

Edward was not so different from his father. He too was fearing his brother's response so much he would not dare to utter a single word.

Slowly, and clearly absentmindedly, Jasper raised his left hand to his face and used his thumb and middle finger to rub his closed eyelids. He sighed softly, so softly that both, his father and brother, missed it. And then he ran his hand over his hairless head.

He didn't know what to think or how to feel. He found himself at a loss for words and thoughts and submersed in an internal void… He was baffled, dumbstruck, stuck on the spot… He was numb.

And as he bent his head while opening his eyes, and remained unnervingly impassive, Edward felt an icy sensation flooding his stomach. He kept quiet, though, still just observing carefully his brother's countenance and still waiting for him to react. He knew Jasper well and he was utterly aware that that lack of emotion meant his response would be even stronger than firstly expected once he assimilated everything he'd heard.

Jasper looked at his father then. He stared at him for a whole minute with a dispassionate gaze that worried Carlisle to no end. And then he simply spun on his heels and made for the office door.

"Don't come after me." Jasper demanded harshly as he noticed Edward turning his body, obviously intending on following him.

That was enough to halt Edward's steps and make his heart feel heavy inside his chest, but Jasper didn't even look back.

He strode to his room and locked his door before going to his balcony. He covered his face with his subtly trembling hands and allowed the air to leave his lungs in a gush. Then he let his hands slide away and sink in his pockets, his gaze roaming forward.

The memory of the conversation Edward had with him about the hypothesis of one of them being adopted struck him right then, his words making sense fast and clarifying what he first just supposed… Edward had known about that for a while and hid it from him…

Jasper expected to feel sadness or anger, but nothing really came… All he could detect inwardly was this emptiness, this complete lack of sentiment, this coldness that was actually making him lightheaded.

He took a deep breath and went in. He sat on his bed and focused his eyes on the wall full of photos before him… And as he carefully went over his father's words in his mind, he looked attentively at each of the so many pictures, which were reminders of every little special piece of his whole life.

Finally, without his complete awareness, the reality presented by Carlisle's story started to dawn on him… And his unconsciously suppressed emotions slowly begun to surface.

Silent tears trickled down his cheeks… And he realized that his worst fear had become true.

He had lost his family.

#IMPOSSIBLE#

The soft knocks woke him up from a dreamless sleep. Only then Jasper perceived he had cried until his forces were drained and he had fallen in slumber.

"Son, please…" Carlisle's voice reached him. "I just want to see if you are okay."

Jasper checked the clock on his bedside table… He had slept throughout the rest of the afternoon and most of the evening.

He felt horrible but something inside him made him sit up and look at the door. He had been able to hear the sadness in his father's voice even through the thick wood of the door… And it hurt him to understand he was somehow hurting the man he had spent his whole life loving and believing that was his parent.

Jasper stood up slowly, forcing himself to do so. He walked even more unhurriedly, dragging himself to the door, afraid of the emotions he thought would surface once he had Carlisle in front of him. He unconsciously held his breath while unlocking the door, and his eyes were looking down as he opened it.

Carlisle didn't say a thing as he saw his son before him. He just felt relieved Jasper seemed as okay as possible given the situation, and waited.

Jasper finally breathed and slowly raised his head. His eyes filled with tears as his gaze met his father's… And he bit his lower lip to hold off a sob.

"You are, have always been, and will always be my son, it doesn't matter how you came to me… Do you hear me?" Carlisle affirmed in a low, steady, but very caring tone.

And that was all it took to break the frail self-restraint Jasper was maintaining.

Carlisle embraced Jasper as he released a strong uncontrollable sob and restarted to cry, and then he got into the room, closing the door behind him without letting go of his son.

He waited patiently for minutes until Jasper calmed down… They sat side by side on the bed and looked at each other.

"Why you never told me?" Jasper's broken voice hurt Carlisle.

"I was afraid you would go after your grandfather… I didn't want you to get hurt… And I definitely didn't want to lose you." Carlisle confessed in a pained tone.

"Dad, do you really think I would've ever gone after a man that wanted me dead even before I was born?" Jasper sounded perplexed. "The same man that was responsible for both my biological parents' deaths?"

Carlisle bent his head, sighed, and nodded. Then he looked at his son with hesitant eyes.

"I feared you would see him as your only real family..." His voice gave away his shame.

"How well do you know me, Carlisle?" And right then Jasper's tone was resentful and bitter.

Carlisle felt as if his heart was cracking from side to side. He furrowed his eyebrows unconsciously but said nothing. He knew how totally right his son was in questioning his judgment.

"I would've understood if you had waited until I was old enough to assimilate what all that entails… But… You weren't even planning on telling me." Jasper kept talking in an aggrieved tone. "You doubted my love for you and Mom." His eyes glistened outrage tears. "You didn't trust I was reasonable or mature enough to handle the truth, and you didn't believe I was loyal enough to my family to prioritize its safety. You underestimated me and my love for all of you."

Carlisle's eyes filled with tears and he bent his head yet again.

"I did." He admitted in clear guilt and shame as some of the tears slid down his face. "You're right, I did. And for that, I will be forever terribly sorry." He took a deep breath and raised his eyes to his son's. "But there is nothing I can do that will take that back. I wish there was."

"So do I." Jasper said in a broken whisper.

They stared at each other silently for a minute. Then Jasper looked away, his face going blank.

"Is there anything else I should know? Anything you should tell me?" He inquired before turning his eyes back to his father's again. "I can't take any more secrets, Dad. If there's anything else you've been hiding from me, anything you know that affects me and I'm unaware of... This is the time to let me know."

"There is something else." Carlisle confessed calmly, although his eyes were still humid and showing his sadness. "I know about your secret."

Jasper frowned.

Carlisle hesitated, heaved a sigh after briefly closing his eyes, then looked at his son.

"You and Edward." He said in a grave intonation.

Only then Jasper realized that he had been so wrapped up in the Edward-being-adopted-and-spending-time-with-Emmett dilemma that, when Jacob had told him he'd met his father, he hadn't assimilated it meant that Carlisle knew about his emotional involvement with his brother.

Suddenly his stomach dropped and his eyes widened.

"You… You know about us…" His voice came out as a whisper and he sounded scared.

Carlisle nodded.

"For a while now. But don't fret, son. As you can suppose by the lack of interference from me, I don't have a problem with it." He assured.

"What about Mom?" Jasper's gaze was guarded.

"Your mother knows what I know. Always. There are no secrets between us." Carlisle clarified cautiously. "She's on her way home right now, by the way. I called her as soon as you left my office. She'll be here by morning." He took a deep breath. "She is not against you two either."

It took a moment for Jasper to take in the fact that his parents were not opposed to his romantic relationship with Edward.

"It was Jacob, wasn't it?"He asked as he concluded that was the logical explanation. "He went to you when I was at the hospital, that's how you found out." He just wanted to confirm.

"That's how I heard of it. I didn't quite believe him promptly, I thought he could have misunderstood something he had seen, after all, you and your brother have always been really close... " Carlisle explained. "However, I saw it myself later that same day."

Jasper felt extremely embarrassed.

"W-what did you… What did y-you see…?" He stammered.

Carlisle chuckled lightly.

"Nothing much." He assured. "At least, not then."

Jasper's eyes were practically jumping out of their sockets as he shook his head.

"Don't worry, kiddo." Carlisle chuckled again while resting his hand on his shoulder tenderly. "I've seen you two kissing, but it didn't really shock me."

"Dad, I…"

"It's okay… Really."

Jasper's eyebrows twitched before he fully frowned.

"It wasn't easy." Carlisle admitted. "Nothing related to you and your brother has ever been easy, actually." He chuckled humorlessly. "But I've come to terms with everything. I love you both so much, and I just want to see you two happy."

Swallowing hard and taking a moment to breathe slowly in order to calm down, Jasper tried to absorb his father's words and attitude.

After a while, he was almost composed, and other questions came to him. He voiced the simplest one, the one he already knew the answer to.

"You know about us for over a month." It sounded like a statement since he was making sense of it.

"Yes." Carlisle confirmed.

Jasper huffed and bent his head because, right then, it hit him that Edward had obviously known not only all about his past but also about his father's awareness of them being a couple for the same length of time and, still, he had been keeping everything from him.

He felt anger mixed with hurt rising inside… A feeling of betrayal taking over him… But he held it all back. His indignation was something he had to work out with Edward, not with his father.

Nonetheless, his "brother" coming up in his mind brought yet another resentment… And as his thoughts were rapidly consumed with the heartache he faced for months before his and Edward's decision of being together, and Edward's over-seven-years-long silent suffering, his eyes hardened and his voice got graver as he spoke his mind.

"So much pain could've been avoided if you hadn't lied to me from the beginning, Dad." He let it out. "Edward and I... Jacob... Emmett… We could've all been spared of so much hurt."

Jasper paused, the memory of all the pain he had caused and knew his brother had caused, the hurt they had felt, all of it weighting over his heart and obligating him to breathe deeply and slowly so he could be able to bear it without breaking.

Deliberately, he gathered what he wanted his father to know to make him understand the damage he could have avoided causing indirectly.

"I didn't realize it like Edward… It hadn't been clear enough for me, or maybe I just wasn't attentive enough to the signs, I was really young and obviously too naive to get them. And I guess I unconsciously suppressed my feelings to protect myself. It took me a long time, his absence, his confession… It took me revisiting my teenagehood and facing things I had ignored… And I had to go through a lot of pain to overcome my denial so I could finally understand and accept that… Maybe… Probably… I've felt like him for as long as he has. I wasn't aware back then but… I know now that I too was drawn to him because it was this gut feeling he incited in me that made me start to realize I was gay."

Still silent, Carlisle sighed sadly.

"Do you realize what I'm saying, Dad?" Jasper heaved a breath. "If we had known the truth all along, we would have naturally grown closer, without any fear… We could've been together for so long… And then Edward and I wouldn't have hurt so much, I wouldn't have hurt Jake and he wouldn't have hurt Emmett… And we both wouldn't have felt so wrong, guilty, and scared when we understood we wanted to be with each other…"

"I know." Carlisle stated in a low voice. His eyes were apologetic at his son. "My mistake robbed you two from the freedom you deserved, from loving each other guiltlessly. I know that." He exhaled and Jasper saw how tired he clearly felt. "In my mind, I've been telling myself all along that I was protecting you… But I know better now." He took Jasper's hand in his. "Will you ever be able to forgive me, son? I am profoundly sorry."

Two knocks interrupted them, and they looked toward the door.

It opened slowly to reveal a very worried Edward and his bigger anxious eyes.

"Is everything okay?" He asked guardedly.

Carlisle smiled subtly to Edward and nodded. Jasper clenched his jaw and averted his stare as resentment took over him once again.

When he looked at his son, Carlisle saw the resistance written over his face.

"You two need to talk." Carlisle said to only Jasper. "Listen to him, don't judge his actions before you know his reasons, okay?" Jasper didn't react, and Carlisle knew he couldn't interfere any more than that. "We talk more tomorrow, once your mom is here." Carlisle said while standing up and Jasper nodded while looking away.

Carlisle walked to the door and stopped in front of Edward, resting his hand reassuringly on his shoulder.

"He's too hurt, so be understanding." He spoke to only Edward.

The older son nodded before taking a deep slow breath.

Once the brothers were alone, Edward got into the room and closed the door, taking more minutes than really necessary to turn and walk to Jasper that, with an indifferent countenance, was looking anywhere but at him.

Edward didn't know what exactly to say, or how to act, so he just sat beside his brother and waited.

When the silence became too strained and his heart started to seem smaller, Edward realized he would be the one to break the quietness.

"Jade…" He let it roll off his tongue in a pleading voice as he circled Jasper's neck with his hand.

Jasper immediately stood up and walked to the balcony without uttering a single word.

Edward heaved a weighted breath, dread taking over him, and stood up as well, following the younger man right away.

"You need to stop seeing me as this fragile little boy that you need to shield from everything." Jasper spoke in an earnest tone, without turning to Edward, once he felt his brother's approach.

Edward halted his steps less than a meter away from him.

Jasper turned and his eyes were hard over Edward.

"I don't see you as a fragile little boy…" Edward tried.

"You do." Jasper cut him off harshly. "So much so that you, as Father, didn't believe I could handle the truth."

Unable to contradict him, Edward released a trembling sigh and looked down.

Jasper sighed too.

"I understand why he underestimated me… That's what parents do because they take longer to see that their children don't need so much protection, that they've grown… But you… You know me, better than anybody else. Or so I thought because… You simply assumed I wasn't strong enough to take it."

Edward looked at him with pleading eyes.

"I was trying to…"

"Protect me?" Jasper asked before he could say the words. "Yeah, I got that. And that's exactly my point."

"Jade…"

"I'm hurt and angry about everything you withheld, but…" Once again Jasper interrupted his older brother. "About my origin… That you didn't have the right to keep from me… It's my story. You should've told me."

Edward took two large steps and got close to him but, when he tried to hold Jasper's shoulders, Jasper stepped back.

"I'm sorry." Edward said as letting his arms loose along his sides.

"No use to apologize… It won't lessen how betrayed I feel or erase what you've done."

"Love…"

"You lied to me. And you kept lying for over a month."

This time Edward wasn't having it. He stepped closer again and held Jasper's arms before he had the chance to dodge Edward's hands.

"I didn't lie, I hid it from you, but I had reasons to do so." Edward explained softly.

"Omission is also a lie, Edward. A lie with a fancy name."

"Jade… Let me explain…"

Jasper shrugged his hands off his arms and pulled away, enlarging their distance.

"I need time." Jasper said coldly, looking at Edward with indifference. "I need some time apart."

Edward felt his stomach drop but remained as composed as he could.

"Okay. I'll… I'll go." He said, his voice faltering. "Just… Come to me when you…"

"I need you to go and stay away." Jasper added once he realized his brother had not understood.

Swallowing hard, his eyebrows twitching, Edward looked at Jasper feeling fear rising inside of him.

"What… do you mean?"

Jasper took a long deep breath and huffed.

"Go home." His tone was stern. "Go back to Hanover. I need you to not be here right now."

Edward gasped and tears promptly started to well up in his eyes.

"Jade, no… Don't do this, please." He openly begged.

Only then, seeing his brother's hurt and fear plainly written all over his face, Jasper faltered and allowed his love for Edward to subtly permeate his attitude.

"It's not what you think," He said, his voice turning soft. "I'm not breaking us up. I'm not pushing you away either… I just…" He took another deep breath so to remain centered. "I need to be rational about it all, I need to have a clear mind to deal with this, and I need to be with my parents, and only with them, so we can get through it." He clarified calmly. "I won't be able to focus on them, on us as a family, if you're around."

"I'm your family too." Edward argued, his voice choked.

"You are." Jasper accepted with sad eyes. "But you're also my lover. I'm never rational when I'm with you, there are too many feelings involved and they are all too intense and consuming… My mind is never clear when we're next to each other." He sighed and looked away from Edward's intense pleading gaze. "Besides… This is about me and them. Not you."

Edward got closer and held his face. Jasper let him.

"Everything that's about you is about me." Edward reasoned as some tears slid down from his eyes.

Jasper felt tears coming to his eyes too.

"No, it's not." He countered softly. "We're bound to each other… Forever, I believe. I love you. But you're you, and I'm me. We have our own struggles and we need to deal with them by ourselves. I need to deal with it by myself, I can't have you around while I try to do this…"

"You are pushing me away." Edward said when he dropped his hands from Jasper's face and stepped back.

Jasper stepped back too, and Edward's countenance seemed immediately defeated.

"I can see why you think like that… I understand. But you're wrong." Jasper stated.

"I just don't wanna lose you." Edward spoke so low that Jasper almost couldn't hear it.

"You won't have anything to lose if I lose myself, don't you get it?" Jasper reasoned with him. "Can't you see that's what I'm trying to do here? Not to lose myself? I'm putting my relationship with Mom and Dad first, so I can ensure I keep my essence and get to still be me… The Jasper they raised, the Jasper that's Carlisle's and Esme's son. I need them so I'll stop feeling like my whole life has been a lie." He paused for a brief moment to gather his thoughts and to recompose his emotions. "Something broke inside me when I learned that shit, Edward… I feel like what has always linked me to them is gone and I need to repair it."

"You don't have to distance us for that." Edward argued once again.

Jasper huffed and shook his head.

"Haven't you heard anything I said?" His tone rising in impatience. "I do. I'm sorry… I know it will hurt you as much it is hurting me, but that's what I need."

"It is hurting me."

"I just can't do this right now." Jasper spoke with himself while turning away from Edward.

"You mean us. You can't do us right now, is that it?" Edward insisted as more tears flowed down his eyes.

With his back to his brother, Jasper exhaled heavily, jutted his jaw and closed his eyes.

Letting go of Edward was hurting him deeply, even if it was just for a while… But he knew that was what he had to do to fix the part of himself that had shattered when he learned he wasn't really Esme's and Carlisle's son.

He turned back to Edward with a heavy heart, knowing well his next words would crush him.

"Yeah. I can't do us." He confirmed, and Edward scrunched up his whole face. "Not right now. Please, try to understand."

Edward sobbed and then released a quivering sigh.

"I can't." His voice broke. "I'm sorry but I can't understand it."

"Just accept it, then." Jasper shrugged.

Before Jasper could blink Edward was right before him, their faces just inches away. Jasper had to crane his neck so he could hold Edward's stare.

"What if I don't? What if I stay?" Edward defied.

"It'll just hurt us more…" Jasper reasoned calmly, although his heart was thundering inside his chest. "'Cause I've made up my mind. And until I mend what's broken inside me, I can't be with you."

Seeing the resolve in his brother's gaze, feeling it clearly in his tone and from his stance, Edward understood he was fighting in vain.

"This is your final word." He murmured.

"It is." Jasper said in the same tone.

"There's nothing I can say or do…" His words sounded pleading.

Jasper sighed again.

"No."

They stared at each other for what seemed an eternity… The two of them felt their hearts clenching while their stomachs churned and their minds screamed against that idea…

But that was a lost fight, and they both knew it.

Edward closed his eyes softly, tears streaming along his blushed cheeks. Then he sighed, clearly resigned, and looked at Jasper with a disheartened gaze.

"I'll be gone by morning." It was all he said before he turned around and strode out of the room.

And as soon as he saw himself alone, and realized what he had just done, Jasper gasped the air he had held and allowed his tears to silently come out.

A/N: Just two more to go, so enjoy the ride.