Author's Note: So sorry for the long (looooooong) delay! Thanks to those of you still reading, we're almost to the end now, so hopefully you'll stick with me a little longer. I just wanted to clear up the references to what's been going on in LA I made previously – it's been so long since Angel has been on and since I've updated, I didn't want there to be any confusion. Andrew being in LA and the mentions of the crazy Slayer are in reference to the Angel episode "Damage" with Dana, who escaped from a mental institution when Willow awakened every potentials power. It's not in reference to anything I've written about in this story, just a kind of behind the scenes peak at what was going on in the canon timeline.
Part XXIV
"While I appreciate the… enthusiasm of this group you've assembled, I can assure you we have everything under control. A slight miscalculation in the magical fields left-"
"Who's this assclown?" Buffy interrupted, looking around at everyone.
"That's Slaughter," Dawn stage whispered. "He's a detective but he actually works for Wolfram and Hart. He came by and threatened us earlier. He really scared me, Buffy…"
The last was said with way too much glee to be entirely true but, even though she knew that was Dawn's aim, it made Buffy see red.
"Oh hell, Dawn, you've done it now," Xander sighed. "If I end up losing my last eye, I'm totally blaming you."
"I'm never going to get my exposition," Castle whined at the same time Caleb seemed to slump a little and groaned, "I'm never going to get to tell my story."
They looked at each other in surprise, while the Scooby gang plus police backup gave Castle some hard side-eye. Buffy decided then that she needed to stay in New York to keep an eye on the writer, just in case there were some errant murderous genes in there somewhere.
Ugh, wouldn't that put a damper on her relationship with Kevin? Well, you know, if stabbings and monsters didn't. Slaying a man's friends was not the way to his heart…
"You're a writer, make it up," Dawn said with a shrug. "Throw in a love triangle and some smut. I think we're about to get to the action chapter, so make sure you live through it."
Castle was looking disgusted, then thoughtful, before Buffy was pulled back to more important issues by the loud snarl from the Uber Vamp as it renewed its struggle under Caleb's knee. Caleb himself had lost his earlier smug superiority and looked both irritated and angry at the arrival of Worlfram and Hart's henchman. Buffy couldn't help but feel the same, but for different reasons.
"You're all in a snit because he's here," she said, gesturing at Slaughter. "But when I showed up it wasn't a big deal?"
Caleb adjusted his grip on the struggling vampire and shifted so he could keep both Buffy's group and the new guy in sight.
"You just cut me in half. He put me in a box."
"Being cut in half has to be way worse!" She argued.
"I'm not going back in that box," he said, lip curling up much like the monster he was pinning down.
"Well, we agree on that at least," Buffy said, spinning her scythe and stepping firmly in front of the group.
"Glad to see you, Miss Summers. I'm sorry it's under these circumstances," Slaughter said, also taking a step forward. "Angel sends his regards."
As always, the mention of her ex made Buffy mentally stumble a little, but outwardly she just shrugged.
"I'm sure his 'regards' will be extra warm and fuzzy soon – I sent him some tourists of the slaying variety."
She was ridiculously pleased to see the alarm flash across his face, before he gave a fake, flat smile in return.
"Well, my friend, it looks like we're on the same side once again," Caleb said cheerfully as he sprung to his feet, bringing the vampire up with him and all the attention back to him. With a hard shove, he sent it towards Slaughter. It didn't seem to mind in the least, or it hated Slaughter as much as it hated everyone else, because it went after him with a snarl.
"Now," he said, rolling his neck with a crack and looking back to Buffy. "Let's finish this, bitch."
"Don't let Slaughter take the Turok Han," Buffy said to Kennedy. "I'll take care of this guy. Again."
"Why do you get the one dude and I have to-"
Kennedy's whining was ended by Caleb suddenly being right there and throwing her into a dumpster thirty feet away. Buffy barely had time to make shocked googly eyes at him before he was attacking.
Luckily her body moved faster than her mind.
"What the kind of mojo did you steal from them?" Buffy gasped, bending backwards and barely missing having her throat snatched.
"A little of this, a little of that," Caleb shrugged, not even needing to pause for a breath as he attacked. "I know greed is a sin, but when God places such gifts in front of you it's rude to say no."
"If steroids make your man-bits shrink up, I hate to know what the magical variety does to them," Buffy mused as she swung the scythe up, grazing his face and letting her get her bearings enough to go on the offensive. He was much faster than before and that wasn't good seeing as he'd pretty much kicked the crap out of her every time they met previously.
"Nothing worse than what you did, I'm sure," Dawn reminded them from the sidelines.
"So, what happened between you and vampy over there?" Buffy deflected, thinking maybe bringing up her junk chopping wasn't such a great idea in front of Kevin's friends. "Last time I saw you, you two were all buddy buddy."
She punctuated her question with a punch as he deflected the scythe from cutting off his arm.
"You know how it is with new relationships," he said, returning her punch with one of his own. "You have a common interest that brings you together, like ridding the world of whoring sinners, but then the shine wears off eventually."
He dodged the scythe again and grabbed her arm, swinging her toward the brick alley wall with enough force that Buffy knew her and consciousness would part ways if she hit it head on. With a quick twist and a jump, she ran up it instead, back flipping as she jabbed down with the stake end of the scythe so he'd have to let go of her arm before it twisted enough to break.
There was a crack like lightning from further down the alley as soon as she landed, making them both pause in time to see a weird yellow forcefield thing spring up around the Turok Han before it shrunk down into the size of a shoebox, taking the vampire with it with an angry screech. The small container sat silently smoking in the center of the alley.
"Dammit, Kennedy," she burst out. "I told you to keep him from taking that vampire!"
"Sorry," came the gritted response as her filthy body came swinging out of the dumpster. "I was learning how to breath and see again after getting thrown like a fucking ragdoll."
"Now, Miss Summers," Slaughter said, as he made his way towards them. "As you can see, we have everything under control. I can take them both back with me and we'll just-"
Suddenly both Esposito and Beckett were there, guns drawn on either side of Slaughter.
"All this time, all those girls, and you didn't say anything," Beckett hissed. "I know you're dirty, but you're still a cop. Even if you really weren't working for the department, couldn't you have gotten backup from your evil law firm? Stopped this sooner?"
Buffy stayed completely still. Beckett was taking this personally and Esposito looked equally pissed off. Normally she was all for letting emotion fuel her fighting, but not when it overruled logic - she didn't know what the hell Slaughter was, but she doubted their guns would do much good even if they could hit him.
She was so involved with thinking of ways of keeping Kevin's friends from getting turned into paste, she almost missed the warning blare of her instincts and lost some hair to the wicked looking knife that almost stabbed her in the face.
"I'm not going back in that box, and I'm not leaving this city without your corpse staining its streets," Caleb hissed, looking more unhinged than she'd ever seen him.
There was a scuffle behind her and with a quick glance she saw Kennedy do a baseball slide on the disgustingly slick alley floor and grab the smoking box. Slaughter watched like he had all the time in the world as she shoved the box into Castle's arms with "watch that". Spinning, she went after Slaughter with a vengeance. Though… a very ineffective vengeance. Buffy gave a tired sigh while every one of Kennedy's moves was blocked – they really needed to do some improvisational fight training. Giles liked structure, but their moves were getting stale.
Her inattention cost her though, she was brought back to her fight with by a hot line of pain in her arm where Caleb's dagger caught her. Hoping Kennedy could at least keep Slaughter occupied long enough for Buffy to handle Caleb, she turned her focus back to the enraged preacher who had dialed it up to 11, arms moving in a blur as he hammered her with blows. The third time she felt the knife cut into her she started wondering if maybe she should've let Willow come with her after all. She also decided to not be so hard on Kennedy because apparently, her own moves had gotten stale as well.
She managed to land a quick punch that did nothing more than earn her an extra six inches of space when the sound of a gun once again scared the crap out of her. Caleb jerked and a hole appeared in his cheek. Buffy could see Beckett in perfect form off to the side before Slaughter threw Kennedy into her and they fell in a pile of limbs. Caleb, somehow looking more deranged than before with a smoking hole in his cheek, coiled, and Buffy braced for impact. But then suddenly there was Dawn, her cute shoe in hand and driving the heel right into his eye. He howled a horrible sound and shoved her hard enough to make Buffy's throat close, but there was Xander, acting as a body cushion for her flying sister.
Not wasting the moment of gory distraction, Buffy swung the scythe and reveled in its melodic hum as it took Caleb's head from his body.
"No! You took my coat but you can't have my Ghost Trap!" Castle yelled, sounding more like a furious toddler than a grown man, but he was curled over the Uber Vamps box in a crouch.
Buffy swung the scythe, the sweet hum drawing Slaughters eye. He paused, staring at her for a long moment, before backing away. Then, without a word, he was gone.
Looking away, Buffy was glad to see everyone seemed relatively unharmed. Holy crap, were they lucky… The fight had been chaotic, but thankfully quick. Castle, was slowly straightening with the box o' vamp, looking like he hardly believed he'd actually protected it. Esposito was helping Kate to her feet and she, along with Kennedy, looked dirty from time on the gross alley floor and moved like they were sore as hell, but neither were bleeding so… yay! Speaking of dirty alley floors…
"You took your shoe off in here? You're going to need a tetanus shot now," Buffy said.
"Your backs all gross," Dawn was whining as Xander tried to convince her to ride piggy back. "I'm not- what? Shot? What?"
"You can stab a preacher in the eye but you can't get a shot?" Xander said, taking advantage of her moment of inattention to scoop her up bridal style instead.
"I thought you be proud of my 'eye for an eye' revenge," she pouted.
"I'm all for pun fueled revenge, but not when you risk your life for it," Xander said.
"And your ultra cute shoes," Buffy said. "Think they can be cleaned?"
"I'm damn sure going to try," Dawn said, making grabby hands. "Gimme."
Buffy wandered over to Caleb's body cautiously. She seriously wouldn't put it past him to come after her even with no head. Esposito came up next to her as she gave it a none-to-gentle shove with the pointy end of the scythe. Satisfied that his flopping was lifeless, she stepped over to his head and pulled Dawn's shoe free with a squelch and a gush of fluids.
Buffy made a grossed out face and turned to see Esposito blinking rapidly and spinning away.
"I'm just going to… um, go secure the entrance," he mumbled, moving away at a fast clip.
Castle was inching forward as Buffy returned Dawn's shoe to her.
"Dawn, it's dripping," Xander said, looking like he was about to drop her and let her hop out on her own. "You can't seriously be keeping that."
"Of course I am! These were this season's exclusives – they aren't making any more."
Buffy tuned them out as they continued bickering as they made their way down the alley. Kennedy joined them, for once not looking angry but instead just tired. Maybe that was how she and Willow got along, Willow just kept her worn out all the-
And mind bleach.
"Don't look at it," Buffy heard Kate say, trying to push Castle back away from the body.
Patting down her pockets and digging out what she needed, Buffy moved up behind them.
"Are you kidding? You think I'm ever going to get a chance to see my decapitated body again?"
"Burning decapitated body," Buffy said, flipping a match past his face.
Castle's eyes got large as the "whoosh" of flame ate up the body, but abruptly he paled and swayed in place before Kate's hand steadied him with a muttered "Can't you ever listen?" that was more fond than anything as she led him down the alley away from the smoke.
"Get out of here," she called over her shoulder. "I'll call this in."
"Wait until he melts enough they can't tell he looks like Castle anymore," Buffy called back, toeing the head into the fire with the rest of him.
Castle's gag could be heard 50 yards away.