In The Cards 28 - Introductions

Wouldn't it be nice if things were simple? Black and white. Good and evil. Right and wrong. Just pick a rule and stick to it, no matter what, expecting people to fit into the molds you define for them. Nice and easy. Safe. And dangerous.

Excerpt from 'Ruminations Of A Master Bard'

For a bandit-infested forest Peldvale was actually a surprisingly pretty and peaceful place, Zaerini decided. Birds sang in the tall trees, swooping and diving through the flickering patches of light and shadow in the air. An uncountable number of small lakes were everywhere, glittering like diamonds in the afternoon sun. The half-elf smiled as she saw Imoen wade into a large patch of pink and sweet-smelling flowers, stirring up a cloud of yellow butterflies in the process. A few of them even settled in her hair like living flower-petals.

"You know, Rini", the young thief exclaimed, "this was a great idea. This place is beautiful. Want some flowers?" She grinned and held out a small bouquet towards her friend.

"Pink isn't exactly my color, Immy", the bard responded with a warm smile of her own. "You keep them. And you're right, it's really beautiful." She was pleased to see her friend so happy. There had been far too few pretty places in their lives lately.

"Apart from the small fact of the bandits no doubt lying in wait to ambush us even as we speak", Jaheira said. The druid hadn't exactly approved of the current plans and not even the calm of the forest was enough to get her into a more peaceful mood. "Oh, I am sorry", she said, green eyes flashing. "Your bandit friend promised not to do any such thing, and of course we all know the wisdom of trusting in complete strangers, particularly dangerous ones."

"Jaheira, you were a stranger to me once", Rini said, trying to bite down on her irritation. "A potentially dangerous one, I might add. If not for the fact of you being Gorion's friend I probably never would have trusted you enough for you to become mine. And for the record, I don't trust him yet. I'm sure he has his own agenda, but who doesn't? As long as he's willing to help I'm willing to let him."

"I a-agree", Khalid said unexpectedly. "Any a-ally is valuable, and should not b-be rejected."

"Khalid, he is a bandit. As Harpers we should…"

"As Harpers we should d-do what we c-can to h-help those who need us. The b-b-bandits are a danger, and this p-person has offered to h-help us against them. I w-will reserve judgement until I have actually m-m-met the man."

Jaheira sighed. Golden-brown hair glittered in a stray ray of sunlight as she shook her head. "Very well", she said. "I do not like it, but I will hold back. Just please do not trust him blindly. Promise me that, child."

Zaerini nodded and gave the druid a small grin. "I promise", she said. "Anyway, I get the feeling he'd be rather disappointed in me if I did." She turned to Edwin to draw the wizard into the conversation. "Say, Eddie, what do you think?"

Edwin didn't answer at first. The wizard had seemed very preoccupied the entire day, as if he had a lot on his mind, and he had been unusually quiet. "What?" he asked, almost tripping over a fallen log until he caught himself. "What did you say?"

"I said, what do you think about Adahn? Think we can trust him?"

Edwin laughed a little morosely to himself. "Trust him? (Oh, the delicious irony of it all.) I'd say you can, up to a certain point. He certainly did seem to like you well enough. (Not that that is likely to help us much.)"

"Think so?"

"You're still alive, aren't you? Even after pulling that imitation stunt. I'll have you know my heart almost stopped at that point. I thought you were about to die."

"You're being no fun at all", Rini complained. Then she grinned and leaned closer to whisper into the wizard's ear. "I don't plan to die anytime soon, not if I can avoid it. And I think our new acquaintance has more of a sense of humor than you do." She used the bandit's voice once again, pitching it so low that only Edwin could hear. It was remarkably well suited for that sort of thing, she thought.

Edwin's reaction to this little joke was spectacular to say the least. He leapt a foot into the air with a small yelp and when he came down again his face was white with anger. "Don't ever do that to me again", he hissed. "I really mean that. Not ever, or I'll kill you myself."

"All right", Rini said, surprised at this sudden vehemence. "I was only kidding you know. No need to be so prickly about it."

"It wasn't funny. (And there is all the need in the world, though you wouldn't know that.)"

Rini would have questioned the wizard more about this strange fit of temper, but at that moment the conversation was interrupted by a strange voice. "Help me! If you don't help me, they'll kill me." It was a woman's voice, low and melodious. Zaerini turned to see who had spoken, and then she had to make an effort of will in order not to gape. The woman who came running towards the adventurers as fast as her legs could carry her was had the build and features of an elf, with a proud and beautiful face that spoke of spirit and determination. Her hair was snowy white, her skin as dark as night, marking her as a Drow, and though she was clearly fleeing for her life she had the look of one used to commanding those around her. Fleeing she certainly was though. A Flaming Fist soldier was chasing after her, brandishing his sword as he ran and screaming curses and vile epithets. He was still some distance behind, but he was starting to gain on the woman who looked pretty much exhausted.

"Over here!" Rini yelled. "We'll help you." The woman was a Drow, and probably dangerous. That didn't mean she deserved this treatment. After all, the half-elf thought, I'm pretty dangerous myself.

The strange woman came up to them, breathing so hard that she was hardly able to speak. "My name is Viconia", she said. "I...I'm not from around here, thank you so much for helping."

The soldier was almost upon the party by now. "Step aside travelers", he cried out. "I am a member of the Flaming Fist. The woman you are harboring is wanted for murder of the foulest sort. She is a dark elf; it should be obvious that she is evil."

Oh, it should, should it? Rini thought. "How very comfortable it must be to live in a world where good and evil are as obvious as the color of another person's skin", she said. "I envy you, really I do. It must be a rare occurrence for you to suffer the pain of actually thinking for yourself."

"He lies", Viconia spat. "I have done nothing wrong."

"Rini, we can't let him do this", Imoen whispered. "She can't help where she was born, can she?"

Zaerini nodded, feeling the heat rise and simmer in her blood. Hotter. Hotter. A fire burning in her veins, roaring in her heart and mind. Her vision was narrowing until the only thing she could see was the soldier in front of her, with his shiny armor and plumed helmet, with his absolute conviction of being on the side of justice and goodness, and the edges of her vision were flecked with red. Like fire. Like blood. The soldier took a step backwards and she guessed that the light in her eyes had flared up as it always did when the rage was approaching. "And do you have any other evidence for her 'foul evil' than who her parents were?" she asked, her voice trembling slightly. Not the tremble of fear. More like a volcano getting ready to erupt.

The soldier hesitated, but he wasn't wise enough to know when to stop. "No other evidence is necessary", he said. "Everybody knows that the Drow are born evil."

Born evil. The words rang through Rini's head and for a few seconds she was quite unable to speak. She had the dim impression that she had bared her teeth in a snarl though, and her fingers were clenching and unclenching like claws. The fire was a roaring inferno by now.

"Yes, that is always a convenient excuse", Edwin remarked. "I am a bit curious as to how you know this, though. You must have met a large number of Drow babies to be able to be so sure of your conclusions. Did they perhaps treat you badly? Crawl after you and bite your ankles, while cackling evilly, that sort of thing?"

"One final question", Zaerini hissed. "On the basis of this 'evidence', which is apparently her black skin and fondness for darkness, assuming you were to catch her, what would you do with her?"

The Flaming Fist soldier responded automatically. Finally, something easy. "Why, that's simple", he said. "I'd just kill her and…AAAAARRRRRGH!" The bard's spell hit him full in the face, blasting him with a ray of burning flames that scorched and blistered his skin. His scream trailed off into a gasping moan as the strong smell of burning flesh filled the air. The spell in itself wasn't enough to kill him, but the blade that buried itself in his neck definitely was. "Sorry", Zaerini said and pulled her sword out. "Wrong answer."

Viconia had an appreciative look on her face as she watched the smoldering corpse lying in a thick patch of lovely blue flowers. "I thank you, stranger", she said. "Perhaps not all surface females are as weak as I once thought."

"We are not", Jaheira said. "You would do well to remember that lest you have cause to regret it. And I wonder what a Drow is doing so far from home. Perhaps you can answer that question for us?"

"I wasn't addressing you, elg'caress", Viconia said, giving Jaheira a contemptuous look with her unnerving red eyes. "You would do well to hold your tongue in the presence of your betters, lest I have cause to remove it." Then she turned to Zaerini again. "You have no reason to trust me", she said, "but I ask you to all the same. I am an outcast from my people, and I no longer receive my powers from the spider queen of the Underdark. The goddess Shar grants me wisdom now, and she is a surface divinity. If you allow me to join with you, I will be pleased to fight at your side."

"No!" Jaheira shouted, her face a mask of anger. "Zaerini, it would be unwise in the extreme to do this. Saving her life is one thing, I admit that it would have been unjust to slay her but taking her into your confidence is quite different. You cannot trust her."

"Jaheira…what did I say about trust and allies before?" Rini asked, feeling quite exasperated. "Let's see what happens, all right? I'm prepared to give her a chance, even if you're not." She nodded to the Drow. "Let me explain a little of what we are about", she said. "No details, just the general outline. Then, you will be welcome to join us if you still want to, though I won't blame you if you don't."

"I'll go where you wish", Viconia said and pulled the hood of her cloak higher. "As long as you keep me from this accursed sun. I fail to see why surface dwellers are so foolish as to want to run around in the sunlight when there is darkness and cool shadows to be found at night."

"Don't you worry about that", Rini said with a small grin. "We have an appointment to keep after sunset, and I have the feeling we'll be taking full advantage of the night ahead. You should at least have something in common with our final group member, or so I think."

"So then I kicked him in the head until he was dead!" The young bandit laughed at his own comment, a laugh that came out as something of a nasal whinny. Then he and his two friends turned to see Zaerini and her friends, and their amused grins turned into scowls. "Get them!" cried the leader, a blond young man with hard blue eyes and a broad gap between his front teeth. Rini sighed to herself. The group had almost arrived at the spot where they were supposed to meet up with Adahn and she'd hoped that the wait would be a quiet one. It was twilight now, and the shadows were starting to get longer, so she'd thought she might actually get a short rest before the meeting. No such luck, apparently.

It's bandit country, kitten, Softpaws said as she bit one of the bandits on the ankle and darted away before he could kick out at her. You have to expect bandits.

I guess. Doesn't mean I have to like it though.

Khalid and Jaheira charged one of the bandits, drawing him into close combat to keep him from using his bow against the rest of the party. Meanwhile Edwin launched an Acid Arrow at the second one, and Rini and Imoen followed up with some real ones that sent the man reeling. Viconia chanted something behind them in a low voice, and suddenly the third bandit froze into place, held immobile like a statue. The Drow calmly proceeded to beat his head in with her mace. It wasn't long before the other two fell as well.

"Well?" Jaheira asked, her mouth twisting as if she tasted something bitter. "Are you not going to proceed?"

"Proceed?" Zaerini asked. "With what?"

"With honoring your promise. The promise you made to Officer Vai. Procuring the scalps of bandits, remember?"

"Oh", Rini said, staring at the dead bandits. "That promise." Somehow the idea of scalping somebody had been much more tolerable than the reality of it. It wasn't as if the scalps were going to be lying ready for her on the ground, all neat and clean. She'd have to actually take a knife and… "I don't think I can do it."

"You do not think you can keep your given word? I thought Gorion taught you better than that. And they are only bandits, they surely deserved death."

"Gorion never taught me how to scalp people! And bandits or not, they'll still bleed." Damn, the bard thought to herself. She's still upset about me letting Viconia come along. She's trying to push me into this to prove some sort of point. Or to test me. Really, I thought we were through with that sort of thing.

"Jaheira, just quit it", Imoen said, her voice uncharacteristically fierce. "It's disgusting. Leave Rini alone, all right?"

"This is getting boring", Viconia stated. "Are we going to stand around here for long?"

Khalid was holding onto Jaheira, trying to get her to calm down, but the druid wouldn't stand for it. "We will do so for as long as it takes for her to make up her mind about this. I need to see…need to know…"

I knew it! It's just some sort of twisted little mindgame. She still doesn't trust me, not completely. If I make decisions she doesn't agree with she has to interpret that the worst possible way. Now she's going to make me out to be either an oathbreaker or a bloodthirsty bounty hunter, I just know it.

"What game are you playing, druid?" Edwin asked. "Just what is it you are trying to prove? That she is not your tame pet to always do your bidding? (Or perhaps the druid is simply starting to gain a bald spot and wants to cover it up with a bandit wig.)"

"Interesting question", said a smooth voice directly behind Edwin. Adahn stepped out from behind the trees, seemingly materializing out of the wizard's shadow. He took in the three dead bandits as well as the adventurers and then nodded politely to them. "Good evening", he said. "My, my, you really have been busy, haven't you? Expanding from heroism and into bounty hunting? Not that the differences are necessarily all that great. It is surprising how many heroes are prepared to cheerfully kill for a reward. Though I am sure the people they kill all feel honored to know that their slayer was somebody virtuous. Makes all the difference to the dead, that sort of thing."

"You!" Jaheira growled. "You set this up, did you not? Perhaps we should ask you to handle the bodies!"

The bandit watched the druid with some interest, apparently oblivious to her ferocious scowl. "Is she one of yours?" he asked Zaerini. The bard nodded. "Pity. No, I did not 'set this up'. If I had, I would not have picked three inexperienced boys to ambush you. And as for the bodies…do you always start a conversation with a stranger by asking him to mutilate a corpse for you? Must get you lots of friends. But no, I must decline. It is just one of those code of honor things that heroes ought to understand. You kill it - you deal with it."

"Yes", Rini said, nodding. "I agree with that." She was furious with Jaheira, and right now she didn't much care what the druid thought of her and provoking her felt like an excellent idea. Might as well go all the way with this. She'll condemn me anyway, won't she? She drew her dagger and walked over to the first of the dead bandits without looking at any of her friends. Then she sat down next to the body and gripped its hair tightly. The task was more difficult than she'd imagined, but she managed. Somehow, she managed. I'm peeling an apple, she thought, trying to keep from crying or laughing hysterically. Just…peeling an apple. Once it was all over, she rose and walked towards Jaheira, feeling a certain grim satisfaction at seeing the druid take a step backwards as she met her eyes. "Here", Zaerini said, thrusting the three bloody objects into the druid's hands. "I did as you asked. Mission accomplished. I hope you're happy. But I'm damn well not going to carry them."

Jaheira simply stared at her gifts and didn't answer.

And will they all hate me now, I wonder?

You know better, kitten, Softpaws said, and the cat gave Jaheira a glare to match the druid's worst. Just hold your head high and look at them. A cat hunts. A cat kills. The druid has been trying to forget that you have teeth and claws. It is past time she was reminded. Now open your eyes and look.

The half-elf did as her familiar bid her, looking from one of her friends to the next. Khalid was looking from her to Jaheira, looking as if he feared they might come to blows. But when he met her eyes, he didn't look angry or revolted, simply worried for her. Imoen's face was sad but when she noticed her friend looking at her, she managed a little smile and mimed 'That's telling her, sister'. Rini sighed. She hadn't known until then how much she feared Imoen's rejection. Viconia was watching her calmly with those strange red eyes of her, watching her with something that seemed like approval. She's probably seen worse than this in the Underdark. Edwin looked…surprised. Not bothered or disgusted, but surprised, as if he'd seen something that he hadn't quite been expecting. And he kept sneaking glances at Adahn, as if he were trying to gauge the bandit's reaction. Adahn himself was also watching her intently. His face didn't give much away, but there was an almost imperceptible hint of understanding in those black eyes. Possibly…even compassion?

"Did you know their names?" Rini asked the bandit.

"Yes", Adahn said, nodding. "Yes, I did."

"Once we have the time, I want you tell them to me."

"As you wish", the bandit said, and for once he sounded completely sincere. "But first, perhaps you might introduce me to the rest of your friends?"

"Yes", Rini said, grateful for this chance to switch the subject. "Yes, of course." She cleared her throat. "Well, you already met me and my familiar, Softpaws." The black cat purred softly and gave the bandit an appreciative look. See if you can get him to pet me again, kitten. Rrrrooorrr! I say we keep this one. "Ah…and Edwin too, of course", the bard managed, stumbling over her words a little as she tried to block out the cat's further comments, dreading the thought of repeating them out loud by accident. "Our resident wizard."

"Ah, yes", Adahn said, looking a little amused. "And a competent one, I'm sure. A pleasure to make your further acquaintance. I've always found magic a fascinating subject, so I'm sure we'll have much to discuss."

"Er…likewise", Edwin muttered. "Yes. Certainly. (I'm not sure how long I can take this. My hair will be gray tomorrow, I'm sure. Assuming we all live that long.)"

"And this is Viconia", Zaerini went on. "Our newest group member." Viconia flicked her white hair out of her face and patted her mace lightly against her free hand.

"Shadow-walker", the Drow said, her voice neutral. "I suppose your skills may prove useful. After all, Lil alurl velve zhah lil velkyn uss. The best knife is the unseen one."

"So it is", the bandit agreed, inclining his head slightly. "I imagine you will be of use yourself, priestess. Not merely because of your skills either. The reputation of the Drow is likely to impress Tazok and make our task easier."

Imoen was practically jumping up and down with impatience. "My turn!" she said, pulling at Rini's arm. "My turn!" She gave the bandit a blinding smile that made him look just a little bit worried. "Hi Blackie!" the pink-haired thief beamed. "Boy, is it nice to see you again, I really missed you. Did you miss me? I bet you did. Of course you did."

They've met? Rini thought, feeling incredulous. Oh no, now what is she doing?

Imoen had crooked her arm through that of the bandit, a possessive look on her face. "Blackie is the best", she said, batting her eyelashes at the other rogue whose demeanor by now was that of a wolf with its paw caught in a trap. Rini thought he looked like he seriously contemplated gnawing his own arm off in order to escape. "Adahn, I mean. He saved my life you know. And he's taught me lots. He's just the sweetest guy once you get to know him better. We have a special connection, you know, one made by fate. Don't we?"

"I…", Adahn said, a distinctly hunted expression on his sharp-featured face. Rini could hear Viconia chuckle quietly next to her. Edwin's jaw looked like it was about to hit the ground at any second and his eyes were as wide as teacups. As for herself, she couldn't help feeling sorry for the man. Immy tended to be very persistent when she had a crush on somebody.

"Don't we?" Imoen asked again with her sweetest smile.

The bandit hesitated before answering, and when he did it sounded like every word was being pulled from between his lips by force. "I…suppose so", he said, gritting his teeth. "Yes. Fate. Of some sort." As Imoen threw herself at him with a delighted squeal, doing her best to crush his ribs, Adahn favored the rest of the adventurers with an icy and very meaningful glare that clearly communicated that comments would not be welcome. Rini noticed that he didn't try to pry the girl off by force though, nor make any disparaging remark.

"And this is Khalid", Zaerini hurried on with the introductions, hoping to defuse the situation. "And Jaheira."

"H-hello", Khalid said timidly. Jaheira sniffed disdainfully. "J-jaheira, please!" The half-elven warrior shrugged apologetically at the bandit. "P-pardon my wife. She has a b-bit of a temper."

"Really?" Adahn said, arching an eyebrow at the druid and speaking in a calm voice that further served to inflame her, completely ignoring her furious scowl. "Would you know, I never would have noticed that. Actually, I've seen worse."

Jaheira looked ready to chew rocks at this inverted insult. Zaerini didn't feel the least bit sorry for her. "And now that we all know each other", the bard said, "I suggest we move on to business. The bandits are waiting."

Imoen was so excited that she could hardly stand still. The reentry into her life of the rogue she had fixed her attention on made her feel all giddy, like her blood was fizzing and bubbling. She was currently staring at him with a rapt expression on her face as he explained something to the rest of the group, thinking that he looked even better than she recalled. And it wasn't as if she hadn't done a lot of recalling before she went to bed at night, along with a lot of fantasizing that featured the two of them in all sorts of interesting situations of an adult nature.

"As I said before", Adahn was saying, oblivious to the plans made by the pink-haired girl, "my position among the bandits requires me to do some recruiting as well as training. Getting you into the camp shouldn't be too difficult - except for one thing."

"What's that?" Zaerini asked.

"Your…how shall I put this…fame. It may be that I'm not the only one able to recognize you as the Heroes of Nashkel. I think we need to change your appearance just a little bit in order to ensure your safety."

"A disguise?" the bard said, with an excited gleam in her golden eyes. "I like the sound of that. What did you have in mind?" Imoen wasn't surprised at her enthusiasm. Rini had always loved disguises, dressing-up and acting. A large number of their childhood games had centered around pretending to be such different things as wild dragons, or wizards, or pirates. Imoen was quite fond of it herself, but her friend's talent for getting into a part surpassed her own.

"Nothing too fancy", Adahn said, looking rather pleased with the half-elf's eagerness. "For you, I think we need to mask that red hair of yours more than anything else. It is attractive, but it is also highly recognizable." He produced a small bottle out of a hidden pocket and handed it to the bard. "This should take care of that. A very useful potion. Three drops on your scalp and you'll be a blonde for the next twelve hours."

"It will wear off, won't it?" Edwin asked, sounding worried. "I mean…not that it matters to me of course…but…"

"Of course it will", the bandit snapped. "I just said so, didn't I? Besides, I made it myself, so I ought to know. It will wear off, and it will cause no harm."

"Right", Zaerini said, still with that entranced gleam in her eyes. "Let's see how it works." She carefully poured three drops onto the top of her head. After a few seconds, the strands of hair closest to the spot where she had applied the potion started lightening. The blonde color spread rapidly like frost covering a tree in winter. In a minute, the bard's hair had turned a bright silver blonde that made an interesting contrast with her golden eyes. "Wow", she said, openly admiring. "That's a great potion. Now let's see…I should make up a part to go along with this." Her face settled into a sort of sulky pout, and when she next spoke her voice held an odd combination of naive seductiveness and bloodlust. "Hi everybody", she said, thrusting her chest out as she spoke. "My name is Bimby, and I love bloodshed, embroidery, reading romance novels and bloodshed. Oh, and bloodshed. If I win the 'Miss Faerun' competition I'm gonna use the title to promote world peace." She stared at her sword as if she couldn't quite remember what it was for. "And I'll do it with this little pointy guy", she giggled. "Dead people are so peaceful, aren't they?" She grinned widely and her voice returned to normal. "Think I'll pass?"

Adahn smiled a crooked smile. "I should think so", he said approvingly. "Yes, that sounds like the sort of woman that would appeal to many of these bandits." He shook his head. "Pathetic, really."

"Should I go blonde too?" Imoen asked. "I will, if you want me to." For some reason, the bandit looked a little taken aback at this.

"Ah…that wouldn't be a good idea", he said. "Your hair is dyed already, isn't it? There could be unfortunate side-effects. No, I think you had better just keep your hood up." He scrutinized the rest of the adventurers carefully, his hands on his back and his head cocked slightly to one side as he paced back and forth in front of them. "Most of the rest of you should be able to pass without notice as well. With one notable exception. I am, of course, referring to the wizard."

"What?" Edwin said, looking a bit startled. "Me?"

"Yes. You. There are other Red Wizards travelling the Realms, certainly, but not so many in this area that you will not stand out. Fortunately, I have provided a way of getting around that." Adahn threw Edwin a folded piece of cloth. It turned out to be a mage robe, a black one, plainly cut.

"You expect me to wear this?" Edwin protested, looking outraged. "I'm a Red Wizard, I don't want to pretend to be some…some hedge wizard."

Adahn fixed him with a dark glare that made the wizard take an involuntary step back, looking rather pale. "I expect you to do what you're told without sabotaging my efforts. I also expect you to do what you have to do in order to stay alive without whining about it like a spoilt child. Now go and get changed!"

The commanding words made Edwin jerk a little. He still looked a bit mutinous, but he disappeared into the trees without further protest, taking the black robe with him. "Wow…", Zaerini said thoughtfully. "Wish I could do that…"

Once Edwin had returned the party set out towards the bandit camp. The walk wasn't a particularly long one, which was fortunate since it was starting to get really dark. On a couple of occasions Imoen noticed that Adahn stopped to signal some unseen watcher before moving on. No doubt sentries were posted here and there. And then she could see light ahead and they passed into the camp proper.

The camp was large, a maze of tents and cooking-fires. Bandits were everywhere. Walking past, hanging about, sitting down to eat, taking care of their equipment. And not just human bandits either. Imoen stared as she saw a pair of large hobgoblins hurry past, growling at the adventurers to get out of the way. And then she totally forgot about them as she saw the creature who was approaching.

It was an ogre. The largest ogre Imoen had seen so far and dressed in heavy armor and a horned helmet. Cruel eyes glared out from beneath its rim, and heavy yellow tusks distorted the ogre's speech. "More new recruits?" the beast snarled. "I don't like the looks of them." He bared his teeth in a hideous grimace. "Tell me why I shouldn't bash all your skulls in and eat your brains."

"That would be most unreasonable of you, Tazok", Adahn said in a cool voice, his face betraying nothing. "I have proved my worth to you before. You may trust me to do what is best."

So that's Tazok, Imoen thought. Boy, he sure is ugly. Those warts are the biggest I've ever seen…And he's almost as rude as Abduh…

Cunning glittered in the ogre's beady eyes. "Maybe", he said. "Best for you. But is that best for me? I'm trusted by him; I'll be his right-hand man once I bash in the skull of that mage of his…"

"Yes, you seem very fond of that sort of thing", Adahn said. "I'm sure 'he' appreciates your unique…talents. But while you wait for your moment of glory, why don't you question my recruits? I'm sure you'll find them satisfactory."

Oooh! Imoen thought. He sure looks handsome when he's being sarcastic like that. Come to think of it he looks handsome all the time in a sort of dangerous way. Makes my knees go all wobbly when he looks at me… And he looks so good in leather. She sighed dreamily. Tight leather. Especially tight leather pants. He's got the hips for it. And the…

Imoen was startled by a sharp elbow to her side. "Snap out of it", Zaerini whispered. "You're almost drooling, you know. I don't think you want either of them to notice that." Actually, both bandits were staring at the pink-haired girl by now. Tazok looked puzzled and annoyed. Adahn looked a little worried. Probably he was afraid she'd let their developing relationship get in the way of business. But I won't, the girl thought. I'll show him I can be terrifying just like him.

"Uh…right!" Imoen piped up. "We're villains all right. Yup. That's us. Hardened villains, bloodthirsty and evil." She scrunched up her face in what she hoped was a menacing sneer resembling that of her devoted love. "And you'd better not bother us or…or we'll be very cross with you."

Tazok scratched his head. "She's a very strange bandit", he said. "Grinning like a flesh-eating chipmunk…"

"But she's very dangerous", Adahn hastily added. "Extremely so. Ah…impossible to escape." Imoen gave him a bright smile and he paled a little. That is so romantic! He's practically swooning with love! Just like in 'Black Knight's Secret' where Kanin the Fallen Paladin encounters his lost love Rosaminda after ten years of exile…He even has piercing and mysterious eyes, just like Kanin. And a lithe and muscular body. Yummy…

"Let's move on", Adahn said, steadfastly not looking at Imoen's frenetic and rather unsuccessful attempts to create the impression of a 'heaving bosom'. "She's dangerous. Trust me on this." Tazok seemed to accept this. He inspected Khalid, Jaheira, Viconia and Edwin in turn, finding them acceptable. Apparently, he thought Jaheira had just the right killer instinct and vicious attitude. The druid didn't seem to know exactly how to react to this. Tazok approved of Viconia especially, saying that a little Drow attitude might be just what the bandits needed.

"What they really need is a bath", Viconia said. "These rivvin stink even more than usual. But I suppose I could use them to run errands and such. That they should be able to manage, if given some proper training." She grinned and swung her mace a little from side to side. "I'm sure I could prod them into action."

"Me too", Zaerini agreed, still speaking in that giggly voice of her 'Bimby' persona. "Oh, it's going to be so nice with all these naughty boys around. Naughty boys make such nice toys…" She smiled sweetly and tossed her blonde hair back, admiring her own reflection in the shiny surface of her sword. "Except they'd better not be naughty to me, or they might just get broken… Sometimes I play a little rough…" She giggled again. "Are we gonna go kill something soon? I'm getting bored, I wanna see some pretty blood. Pretty, pretty blood. It brings out my eyes, don't you guys agree?" She smiled sweetly at her companions. "Anyway, who should I kill first? I'm really good at it, my Daddy always says so."

"Hrrrgh", Tazok said. "Good. Yes. Tazok wants you." He turned to Adahn. "Make sure she doesn't break anything she's not supposed to. I take a patrol and leave for mine tonight! Keep pressure on trade routes and there be extra gold for all when we are done! I leave soon." He paused. "You take the time to check out the other new recruits as well."

"Other new recruits?" Adahn said, not sounding very pleased.

"Yes. Teven brought them in an hour ago." The ogre snorted. "The halfling will do, I suppose. But the mage is crazy." He looked at Zaerini again. "Though maybe not as bad as some. And then there's the zombie."

"Zombie?!" Imoen squeaked. "What zombie?"

"Big ugly thing", Tazok said, oblivious to the irony of his statement as he dug around with a meaty finger inside his enourmous left nostril and ate the result of this excavation. "Stupid brute, but strong and mean, that Abduh. Yes, very strong and mean." He turned and walked off, leaving a group of unpleasantly surprised adventurers behind.