Let me just say a major thank you so so SO much to everyone who reached out. I am feeling 5,000x better. I appreciate you all so much!

Thanks to Bamberlee for editing this chapter!

Happy Birthday Martha! I hope it was awesome! ❤

There is great melancholy in all heartache.

It doesn't discriminate in any way, nor does it slow or lessen given the circumstances. I feel it swallow me whole when Harrison calls to tell me he's back in Amity, and the sheer agony of being apart from him makes my heart hurt. It's weird to long for someone I don't know, not really, but the familiar connection is there, stronger than I'd ever believed possible.

I feel the same heartache when Eric leaves for work on a dark morning and I do not. My place in Dauntless might not be in an office or walking a patrol route, not yet. Maybe never. But I don't want him to leave, not after last night, not after broken stars having promised him to me and the way he lingered to say goodbye without actually saying it.

I feel the same heartache –tangible and slicing –when I run into Tris and Four walking down the hallway. Their story is not mine, nor is it anything I'm familiar with. Rylan and Christina slipped in secret hints about what had happened, some good, some bad, all interesting, and other pieces nothing more than a laugh that neither of them would have ever imagined this would happen.

Four is still wonderfully clueless about his life here. Even with the intense chart Rylan made for him, one which ranked Four's select friends by numerical order –including himself as number one and an incorrect map in which all pathways lead him to Eric's office, Four was lost. His eyes were slowly losing the spark of interest in anything but Tris. Jason was forced to have Four walk with one of the squads. He was hesitant to arm him but unwilling to let him get injured, and he picked the safest, most boring route, all in hopes of forcing memories of his life here. It resulted in nothing. A squabble over why Four was not issued a weapon he could undoubtedly shoot and a further argument where Jason announced he couldn't trust him.

Others tried.

Kacie had him work a shift. He quickly grew bored with watching Dauntless but zeroed in on Harrison in Amity. He watched the trees for a while, until Kacie realized there was a small group of factionless gathering, and in a panic, quickly pushed him home while trying to diffuse a situation no one else on her team had noticed.

Arlene sent her regards.

Max hid in his office.

Quinten made Four his favorite dinner. He stopped by to drop off dinner for Eric and myself right after, turning up his nose at the thought of bland chicken and blander mashed potatoes. Eric smirked into his own carefully crafted culinary delight; with every slice of a steak which looked close to still being alive, he smugly applauded his superior appetite and his own brilliant grasp on what was going on. There was no agreement there: Four might have liked his dinner, but despite Quinten's best efforts, it wasn't bringing his memory back.

But this might.

I press myself closer to the jagged wall, and I clutch the heavy book in my arms as I try to blend into the dark. It is impossible, but not entirely.

From my vantage point, a disturbingly deep alcove that gave way to the corner, I watch Four and Tris without them seeing me. My back presses against the cool rock, and I stay silent, holding on to the novel I'd found in Eric's room. It was a story about a haunted pet cemetery. I found it an odd choice for him to read, but it had a note from Jason stuck in it, thanking Eric for his help on some project.

I planned on taking it to lunch to read, but I have new plans now.

Better plans, which include watching Four try to figure out what's going on.

Their conversation drifts over to me thanks to the high ceiling and slick floors, and at first, it's nothing crazy. A mumbled confirmation of Four's father in Abnegation, and a muttered agreement that he was safer here than there. A single irritated bark that he had no intention of leaving Dauntless, though someone must have suggested this at some point. I try to listen for his father's name, but it's lost when they stop walking and Tris asks Four if he remembers her.

Or anything about her.

His silence is painful.

The unfairness of the situation is compounded by the hope in her voice. Since I saw her last, she'd been avoiding Jeremy as if her life depended on it. She was the dedicated person making sure Four stayed alive and unharmed, and I wondered if someone had asked her to, or if this was a personal choice. Maybe she felt like she owed him, or perhaps had some lingering guilt about their breakup. Or maybe she just wanted to help out.

I wonder a whole lot more when he lowly says no, and her heavy silence is broken by her saying she can't do this much longer.

"Shit!"

Neither of them hear my gasp.

I leave the wall for a second to leap forward, but I stop when I see Four moving closer to her. He shakes his head back and forth, and his shoulders drop in utter defeat.

"Why? I was nice to Everly! I tried! She just jumped off the counter and left. You made it sound like you didn't even like her so what's the issue? Are you really that mad that I told her to leave me alone?"

The stab of insult is sharply personal. I wince it away, because really, she and I weren't exactly friends, and maybe my help wasn't enough for her.

"We aren't…I don't really know her. But she is nice, sure. Do you know Eric brought her here and married her without telling her? Did you know everyone thinks this story is hilarious? Not a single person has told Eric he can't do that. Even Christina loves her. She's always going on about how nice Everly is and how Eric is completely different with her. No one has explained that he might kill her in her sleep. Or pointed out Eric only wants her because –"

"Everly knows she's married," Four interrupts, and his seriousness makes me smile. "I told her to stop asking me if I was alright. I feel…like maybe I shouldn't have been mad at her. Maybe I should be mad at you. Because you keep getting close then leaving before I can figure out why."

"You couldn't figure it out before so it's not a surprise you can't figure it out now!"

We all freeze.

I stay perfectly still, watching Tris' horrified expression and wide eyes. Her hand flies to her mouth, and she turns a lovely shade of absolute white as she scrambles to shove the words back inside.

"What did you say?" Four closes the distance between them, and his head tilts the same way Eric's does when he's processing something. "What did I do to you before?"

"Nothing," Tris swears, but it's a clear lie. "Four, let's just go back home. I'll take you back to your apartment and you can….you can…"

"I can what? Wait around until I remember why you're making me walk the back-way home? I might not be able to remember things but I can see what's going on now," he answers lowly, but I can still hear him. "Are you going to marry him? Is that why you keep leaving?"

Four and I both wait.

He probably wouldn't appreciate me eavesdropping on their conversation like this, but I can't move. A large part of me wants her to tell him everything. Break up with Jeremy. Move in and take care of Four until he can remember who he is. Start over.

A larger part of me hopes I get to see them be happy.

Unfortunately, fate has other plans.

"Yes. Yes, I am. He asked me again and I couldn't tell him no."

Fuck.

This dose of melancholy is a punch to the stomach. Four steps away from her like she's struck him, and he holds one hand up to stop her when she says his name softly.

"Four…"

"No…just…no."

He retreats.

He turns on his heel, spinning around so fast he misses the way her face falls, and her hands ball into fists. Her answer is another lie; just as painful, just as strained. He doesn't get to see any of this, because he storms away in the direction they'd just come from. His eyes are dark, flashing with both rage and disappointment, and I want to tell him I understand completely.

But I don't.

I stay back against the wall, until Tris weakly calls his name again, only to be met with silence.

"Why do you care?"

Eric stares at his reflection in the mirror and his eyes flit over to me for a split second.

"Why don't you care?" I stare back at him, his grey eyes narrowing to examine his cheek, and he throws me a look of disgust. "Isn't he…your…"

"I swear if you say Four is my friend, I will personally ship you back to Amity myself. I can have a truck ready in ten, tops."

"Well, you married me so now you can't. Though, I guess we could have separate residences," I shrug, and I reach up to fix the loose strap on my nightgown. I balance carefully on the edge of the vanity in the bathroom, though his sink is wide enough that it poses no real risk of me falling. "Is that allowed?"

"No, it's not."

He turns on the water, splashing his face a few times, and I watch him reach for a jar of something.

I'd come in here while he was getting ready to go to bed. I'd wanted to tell him about Tris and Four earlier, but our evening was nothing but interruptions. Eric made dinner, some sort of noodles and beef and vegetables that tasted way better than when I had made it, but Max called. We sat down to watch some show about people competing an obstacle course over water dyed to resemble fiery lava, and Jason called. Eric tried to get out of that one, but it proved impossible. Jason swore he saw…. Something. He claimed it was the elusive Chupacabra, per Harrison's confirmation, and Eric spent exactly thirteen minutes continually denying his request to rate this a higher security priority than the Amity border.

I thought I'd be able to talk to him when he hung up, but his next phone call was immediate.

It was Arlene, asking if I could come back downstairs to be retested.

Eric said yes.

I said no.

"He looked really sad when he stormed away," I confess, watching Eric lather his face with shaving cream. "Why are you shaving now? Aren't you going to bed?"

"He should be sad. Jeremy suggested if Four's memory does not return, he shouldn't stay here. He offered up the idea of him going back to Abnegation since he has no loyalty to Dauntless. And yes, you're going to bed. I have a meeting." Eric doesn't look at me, only his reflection. "It won't take long."

"What kind of meeting happens so late?" I stare up at him, disliking his shrug and wondering who on earth he was meeting that he felt the need to shave.

"It's seven thirty. Almost all the faction is still awake, except for you."

"I'm not asleep," I scowl, but I don't take my eyes off him. He scrapes the blade of the razor against his face, and the action is fascinating. "Why would Four go back to Abnegation?"

"His father is there. He's on their council. Jeremy's logic is we aren't responsible for him, so if Marcus wants him back, it's a solution that might work for all of us." Eric pauses to rinse the razor, and he looks at me. "What?"

"That's not a good idea, is it?" I don't know why, but my stomach turns over so sharply that I have to steady myself. "If he goes back there and doesn't remember anything?"

"No, it's not." Eric agrees easily, and my stomach tightens again. "We don't have any real stake in Abnegation, and one can get close unless we storm the place. Tris' father is on their council, so there's a chance he'd keep an eye out for him."

"I don't think you should do that," I insist, and I feel terrible for Four. "If his memory comes back, he'll just…come back here. So he should stay here."

Eric's side eye is intense.

"Are you forgetting he helped Evelyn form an army? Or the attack on Amity? Neither of those help his case. He has no one here. Everyone is just…babysitting him without any end in sight. Even Tris isn't responsible for him."

"Well," I sink back against the mirror, and Eric pauses to hear what I have to say. I appreciate this tremendously, but I don't know what to say. I don't know Four or Tris very well, but it doesn't seem right to just send him away as punishment for all this. "Can I help you?"

Eric stares.

His lips part open to say something, then he closes them for a few long seconds.

"With shaving or with Four?"

"Maybe I can help with both," I slide closer, and to my surprise, he hands me the razor blade. It looks lethal. Sharper than the one in his shower, and heavy. "This seems dangerous."

"It is. Try not to kill me. If I'm going to die, I'd like it to be honorable. Not at the hands of my four foot tall wife."

I smile at him in sheer exasperation, but I gesture for him to come closer. His skin is warm from the water, and I press my fingers to his cheek to get a better angle.

"Have you told anyone I'm your wife?"

I press the sharpest side of the blade to his skin, and there's a quick learning curve to how much pressure I need to apply. The first swipe is too gentle, but the second is enough. Eric stays perfectly still, head cocked and eyes on me, and he only moves when I rinse the blade off.

"Yes."

"What do they think?" I tilt his jaw up, liking that he's letting me do this, and ever surprised at the barest hint of willingness to let me get this close. "Tris seemed mad over it."

"She's always mad," Eric throws out, but his words slow when I reach his throat. He swallows once, and his fingers find my thighs. "I don't give a fuck what anyone thinks. You shouldn't either."

"Tris said she's marrying Jeremy," I inform him, and I press his cheek to turn his head to the side. "Do you think she will?"

"No," Eric's shrug is immediate. "He's only doing it to keep her away from Four. The stress is starting to get to her. She missed a shift in the control room the other day. Come to find out, Jeremy told her about Four possibly leaving and she lost her mind. I don't foresee any sort of wedding in their future."

"I would have liked to go to their wedding. Maybe not her and Jeremy, but if she ever got married," I answer quietly, and it's impossible to miss his eye roll. "What? You wouldn't have gone?"

"Never."

He falls silent, turning his head slightly, and he patiently waits for me to continue. The real act of trust is him assuming I won't slip up and slice his throat apart. He must be very confident in my ability to not kill him, because he steps closer so he's between my legs, and his bare chest is inches from me.

"What if she marries Four? Then he can stay here. Just like I get to stay here because you married me," I use my fingertips to turn his head further, but I catch his lips turning up before he can stop himself. "I think it's a good plan. You know it would work. From personal experience."

"Funny, Amity." He answers shortly, then takes the razor from my fingers to finish up the side much faster than I could have. "I'll be back in an hour. Two hours max. Try not to get into any trouble while I'm gone."

"Who is the meeting with?" I look up at him while he finishes shaving, and he steps away only to wash his face off. He pats his skin dry then resumes standing in front of me. "Is it Jeanine?"

"No. But it is someone from Erudite," Eric answers quickly, and he cocks his head when I frown. "It's not anyone you know. It's a woman claiming to have some intel on Jeanine. There's a chance it's a setup, but Max insisted we follow up on it."

"Oh, well…" I don't know what to say, because her name still makes me nervous. "Do you want me to go with you?"

Eric shakes his head. The dark gauges are extra dark in his ear lobes, or maybe the lighting is making him look more pale than normal. I study him wordlessly, until he reaches out to touch my hair. He twists it around his fingers for a second, and his smile is slow and unbothered.

"I'll be back soon. Go to bed. Don't worry about the meeting. I have a hundred more to attend in the next few weeks."

I listen.

Not because he expects me to follow every command he throws my way, which were few, but because I'm tired, and I have absolutely nothing to keep me occupied from worrying about his meeting. I fall asleep with my head on his pillow, and I don't wake up once, not even when he comes home far later than he promised.

Arlene calls at nine thirty in the morning.

I groan when my phone rings, and the list of people who would call me is awfully short. I was hoping it was someone else; maybe Forrest having borrowed Harrison's phone, or Willow, calling to tell me how she was feeling. Even Sophia or Courtney, feeling like they live far, far away, but having found a way to call.

It's none of them, only Arlene, squawking in my ear to ask if Eric told me she wanted to redo the test.

"What? No. I don't want you to have any more of my blood," I sit up, shoving my hair out of the way and glancing at Eric's side of the bed. He'd left early this morning, squished near the edge because I'd fallen asleep on his side, unconsciously seeking him out while I slept. "I don't need to come back down there."

Her sigh is heavy.

"Look, I know you don't want to have more bloodwork. But…. someone, who shall remain nameless for my own sanity, hacked into my system and changed all the names. There are two positive pregnancy tests and six negative ones. I have no idea which one is yours." Her pause is purposeful, but annoying. "Therefore, I need you to come redo the test."

"I'm fine," I answer without having any actual proof of this. "I'm not sick at all. Or pregnant."

"Everly," Arlene starts to say something, and in the background is a bunch of noise. It sounds like someone screaming, then someone laughing as a loud crash echoes. "RYLAN, I TOLD YOU NEVER TO COME BACK HERE."

"I have a headache!" He yells back, and I hear someone else begging him to just take the medicine and leave. "I need you to check it out."

"I'll check you out. Right out of this faction!" Arlene threatens him, and I crack up when he tells her where she can shove her generic painkiller, then politely asks for something stronger. "It's not children's medicine. It's what's recommended for a headache. Now go home!"

"NO! I got kicked in the head and now my head hurts!"

"Everly, I'll call you back," Arlene's exasperation is hard to miss. "Just…if you start to have any symptoms…nausea, vomiting, exhaustion…come down here sooner rather than later. But honestly, if you come down and redo the test, I'll have the results by the end of the day. You'd have a definite answer and you can start the birth control then."

"Oh, crap!" I sit up in bed, and I stare at the dark walls in pure horror when I realize the test she did have probably doesn't even count. "Um, well, I've had sex since that appointment. I don't think that test would be accurate anyway. You should ask Eric. Maybe I'll come by next week. If I have time."

"What!" Arlene crashes into something or someone, presumably Rylan, and I hear her hotly inform him to quit making online appointments because he's crashing their new system. "Wait, Everly hold on. Just come down here and –"

"Don't do it, Everly! She's a terrible woman! Terrible!"

Her phone disconnects abruptly.

Or she's thrown it at Rylan.

Either way, I hop off Eric's bed and I pause at the large mirror by his closet. I examine myself intently, noticing I look absolutely no different, especially in the nightgown. I look the same as I did last week; my hair is long and dark, and it matches the dark fabric. Pleased with this incredibly accurate scientific proof, I head into the bathroom to take a shower, with plans to go surprise Eric at work and inform him he can get the test results from Arlene because I am 100% fine.

My plans take a sharp turn when I find Four sitting by the chasm.

The sight of him alone isn't odd; I'd run into him plenty of times in Amity looking like he hated life, and today is no different. He sits watching the water with a bleak stare, and every so often, he inches closer to the edge.

Which makes my heart leap into my throat.

The edge he's sitting on isn't all that much, and from what I'd learned from Eric's romantic messages about the chasm, if you fell down it, you wouldn't survive.

"Hey!"

I walk over slowly, and I only greet him when I'm close enough that he won't startle. He looks up warily, and his tired expression doesn't lessen when I sit down beside him. It takes all of three seconds for my phone to beep, and I know Eric has someone keeping an eye on me.

"Hey, Everly."

Four isn't at all impressed when I manage to sit down without falling. It's hard in the skirt I have on. I finally pull my feet beneath me, staying farther back than him, but I realize there's a ledge beneath where he's sitting and his feet are balanced on it. It doesn't make me feel any better, especially not when he sighs.

"Did Eric send you over here? To push me in?"

"Not today," I answer cheerfully. "He's in his office."

Four side eyes my explanation while I peek down over the edge.

The chasm is pretty. I like the rushing waterfall, even though the spray is misting us as it roars past, and the drop is so steep it's hard to see the bottom. From what I can see in the darkness, rocky, jagged edges jut out, making the fall a painful one. The water violently crashes into the pool a few stories beneath us, giving way to an underground river.

The sight makes my head spin.

"Doesn't this freak you out?" I look up at Four, fully expecting him to say yes.

Instead, he shrugs. "No. I feel like it should. Part of me wants to get up and leave, but what's the point? What do I have to do? The only person who gives a shit is getting married and that very guy is pushing for me to be exiled. Apparently, I started some war. Here and elsewhere."

"Yeah, kind of," I answer truthfully, and he throws me a look of disdain. "You did! I don't know what you want me to say. I was a part of it. Your mother started a war on my home faction. I got attacked because I didn't want to join her army."

"Well…I'm sorry. I don't know why I would have done that," Four mutters. He kicks his shoe back and forth, and a tiny rock crumbles down into the darkness. "I don't want to go to Abnegation, but I have no choice if that's what they decide. I guess…that's what I deserve. Even if I don't remember it."

"I wasn't going to ask," I grin, and my phone buzzes again. I pull it out of my jacket to see Eric's name on the phone, and I answer before he can storm down here. "Hi."

"Are you trying to die?"

Eric's voice is dry. Behind it, there's some very valid concern, and behind all that, is Rylan still yelling how Arlene needs to be demoted for kicking him out of the infirmary for a year.

"Is Rylan okay?"

"Everly," Eric says my name in total exasperation, and the sound makes me smile because I can picture the look on his face. "Please, for the love of God, get away from the edge of the chasm. Take your friend Four and go eat breakfast. Take him outside. Take him to Harrison. I don't care what you do but GET AWAY FROM THE WATER. You're going to slip and fall to your death."

"It's really quiet here," I insist, but I do scoot back. Four looks up curiously, and I motion for him to follow me. "And how am I supposed to pay for breakfast?"

"Just…have them bill me. You can use your ID card, too. It's linked to mine." He still sounds stressed, and there's a grunt of annoyance when I don't move. "Any day now, Everly!"

"Are you watching me?" I look up at the ceilings, trying to see if I can see a camera or anything, but I don't.

"No, but Will is. Every three seconds, I'm being sent a picture of you nearing death."

"I'm not going to die," I reach for Four to pull him back, and he swats me away with an air of pure annoyance. "Okay, well Four and I will go eat. Then what? Are you coming home? Arlene keeps calling me. She said I have to do the test again because Rylan mixed up all the names."

His exhale is heavy. "I know. He's very sorry. He thought it would be funny and he swore he wrote down the ones he changed but he didn't. Which explains why Jason got a positive pregnancy test when he was there to see if he's anemic."

"Is he?" I watch Four stand up, wiping his hands on his pants, and he reluctantly follows me away from the edge. I pause at the two hallways before me, not really sure which one to take.

"Well, thanks to Rylan, no one knows," Eric answers humorlessly, and in the background, Rylan protests he's truly sorry. "Go to Clyde's. Tell Lucy to bill me."

"Okay," I agree, and I still don't know which way to go. "Hey, um, before I tell you goodbye, do I go left or…"

"It's to the left." Eric pauses, and there's a quick moment of silence. "I'll take you to Arlene tonight if you want. We should…you should decide what you want to do with that. Not me. If it's not too late. I didn't really try not to…"

"Not to what? What do you mean?" I go to the left as Eric trails off, and Four follows along silently. "You didn't try not to what?"

"I have to go," his answer is slightly miserable, and I nearly crash into the wall when Four loudly informs me to watch out. "I'll see you tonight."

"Wait!"

He hangs up before I can get an answer out of him. Beside me, Four shakes his head, and he throws me a sympathetic half smile. "This week is sucking for both of us, I see."

"What are you talking about?" I follow him as he goes right, and to my surprise, he picks the correct route. We both look shocked when the stairs take us in the right direction, and a low sign tells us Clyde's is around the turn. "My week isn't sucking."

"Sure. Your husband wants a baby and you don't. I heard all about it from Arlene. She was mostly muttering to herself, but I put it all together." Four informs me, and he catches my stare. "I don't…okay, I don't know all that for sure. She just said Eric wants something no one ever thought he'd want, and he wants it with you. I'm assuming it's a family since he has everything else."

"Do you remember him?" I stare up at Four, and his eyes flash with brand new amusement. "You do, don't you!"

"He's the only thing I remember. How lucky am I?" Four sighs, and he stops in front of the doors to Clyde's. "I can't tell if what I'm remembering is new or old memories. I saw him walking with some blonde girl last night and he looked pretty happy. But, today, I don't know if that was what I actually saw, or if it was from a night long ago. So…who knows? My assumption is Eric doesn't want you to leave, and his hopes hinge on you being trapped here forever. How romantic."

I glare at him, but I don't get the chance to ask him any more questions.

The doors to Clyde's swing wide open, and out comes Lauren, heading straight toward us.

"Why doesn't he remember?"

Lauren is a vicious sight. Her posture reminds me of Eric, perfectly straight and immediately defensive, and I wonder if I never bumped into Eric if he would have wound up with her. For a second, I imagine this theory while she stands in front of me, because she looks an awful lot like me. Her dark hair is down today, and her all black leggings and shirt mock my skirt and long-sleeved shirt.

We look at each other, and she has maybe an inch on me.

If that.

"He can't. It's not his choice," I answer so Four doesn't have to. He stands next to me with his eyes narrowed at Lauren, and I wonder if they got along before all this. "Why? Do you want him to remember you?"

Her eyes widen.

Lauren shakes her head furiously, and she steps back from both of us. "I heard a rumor he was back with Tris. I saw her looking like she'd been crying in the control room. I thought maybe he remembered what was going on or someone informed him of what happened."

"He doesn't, but you can ask him," I cross my arms over my chest, and Four cracks the barest hint of a smile. "Do you need something else?"

"Do I need something else? Actually, I do. I need answers about why you're here. How you're married to Eric. What did you do to him? Do you really think he's going to stay married to some…some girl from Amity?" Lauren looks livid now, having gotten past Four not remembering her and returning to her dislike of me. "You don't even have a job here. Do you just sit there and wait for him to come home?"

"No," I answer without thinking, but she has a point. "I'm going to start working in a few weeks. And for your information, he's very happy with our marriage."

"Doubtful," Lauren says smugly, and I resist the urge to punch her. "His last girlfriend was Jeanine's assistant. He doesn't often associate with literal nobodies. Once he realizes you don't have much to offer here, he'll be done with you. I heard him talking about it."

"Well, if I have to have a job, then maybe I'll take yours," I throw out, and I ignore Four's bark of laughter. Lauren throws him a nasty stare, but it doesn't do much. "Since you had such a hard time with both classes. At least, that's what I heard."

"I'd like to see you try. We all know you're only here because it makes him look good. You'll realize that when he–"

She doesn't get to finish her sentence.

Four punches her for me.

I stand there with wide eyes as he punches her square in the face, then rears back to stare at his work. Lauren's shriek is loud, but Dauntless is loud so it goes mostly unnoticed. She hops away with both hands on her face, and her cheek is bright red where his fist landed.

"Are you fucking serious? Why did you just punch me? What the hell!"

"You're being rude," Four shrugs, and he nudges me with his elbow. "There. Are we even now? You won't be mad at me anymore?"

"I'm not mad at you. You told me to leave you alone," I look up at him, nearly as tall as Eric but far less intimidating, and he looks hopeful. "If I ask you to, will you punch her again?"

"Sure."

"Fuck you both. Seriously." Lauren glares but she makes no move to come near us. "I'm bringing this to…to…"

"To who? Everly's husband? I'm sure Eric will be on your side when he hears how you said he's going to dump her." Four shoves past her, and he gestures for me to follow. "Come on. I have a card here. Maybe…that one girl with the shitty attitude is working."

"This isn't over," Lauren hisses, and she waits for me to argue with her.

I don't.

I follow Four inside, walking quickly to keep up.

"Do you remember her?" I catch his arm when he pauses to survey the bar, and he picks a booth way in the back. "Four?"

"I don't have to remember anything to know I don't like her," he answers flatly, and he glances down at me. "Do you like Lauren? Should I not have punched her?"

For a second, I think this over.

In reality, he didn't need to punch her. Lauren wasn't anyone I was worried about, and while her words were insulting, I didn't really care. Eric had made it pretty clear he didn't want me to leave. If I had to guess, I would say he was hoping we'd have a family as soon as possible. My goal in Dauntless wasn't to deal with a newborn all day, or be stuck at home with a baby while he went out with his friends, but I had the sudden suspicion he was desperate for the family he never had. I think he wanted permanence, past me being his wife, and past us just living here.

I was finding it impossible to say no to the only person who'd ever cared about me.

Not to mention the fact that I was tired, something which crept up out of nowhere and settled right into my bones. Perhaps I should see Arlene, or even have Eric go with me.

I forget all about that as Four clears his throat, patiently waiting for my answer.

Him punching Lauren was a peace offering, one he might get in trouble for, but he doesn't seem to care. Maybe once you have nothing, there's nothing left to fear.

"No, you definitely should have punched her. Thank you."

He smiles slightly, less hopeful and more real, and the two of us sit down in Harrison's bar so we can watch Lauren finally leave, loudly yelling how she's going to file a complaint.

The news makes its way to Eric quickly.

I imagine he heard it while in some meeting. I hadn't been in any of the conference rooms, but I could conjure up the image of him sitting there, his uniform jacket buttoned all the way up and a sneer on his face. I could also imagine the very moment he got Lauren's official complaint, maybe slid across the table by Linda, or even Jason.

It had probably made him smile, just like now.

"You aren't mad?"

My eyes are closed, and his chest is warm. The TV screen is on, casting a cool glow over the living room while Eric watches a show about unsolved mysteries. His fingers are in my hair, lazily twirling a piece around and around, and he only stops to shift me closer.

"At what? Four punching Lauren? I think it might be the first thing he's done that I approve of." Eric's words are low and heavy, and I hear him snicker when tells me Lauren's complaint was a mile long. "I had to explain you don't report to Lauren, so there's no logic in her complaint of insubordination or as a threat to her job security."

"I said I'd take her job," I confess, my fingers digging into the soft fabric of his shirt, and his exhale is content. "But she said you'd leave me and…"

I don't finish what I'm saying.

I'm sure Eric knows. I'm sure Lauren's report included everything, including my audacious claim on her job. I had absolutely zero training for it, nor did I even know if I'd make it through an initiation here, but I like that it bothered her enough to be included.

I like it even better when Eric laughs, and his fingers slide up to my temples to press carefully.

"You can have her job, Amity. You can have whatever you want."

I don't even get to answer him.

I fall asleep before the mystery is ever solved, tired and warm and happy that Eric didn't care Four punched Lauren, and that his claim, wild and completely insane, is all the more proof that I'm not leaving any time soon.

I sit upright in pure panic.

The nightmare hovers behind my eyes, refusing to fade, and it pulls at my skin. I wipe at my cheeks furiously, smearing the hot wet proof of my own terror, and I can only compare it to what a fear landscape must feel like.

I'd fallen asleep on Eric's chest, and woke up in his bed. In between all this, was the never-ending nightmare from nowhere. I'd drifted off listening to Eric talk about Lauren, and whatever show he had been watching worked its way into my dream. It started off normal enough, me walking through Amity, staring up at the thick trees and twined branches, and it took a sharp turn once Colton appeared.

I'd nearly forgotten about him, and how he currently resided somewhere in Dauntless. Like a creature that lurked in the night, he was waiting, hiding until we would meet again. In my dream, I stared him down, unwilling to back away and knowing I had to prove myself. The worst of it was I knew I'd lose; Colton outweighed me by enough to pin me down, and he was feral with each step he took. The dream grew worse when I tried to punch him, and he momentarily turned into Lauren. Her features were muddy as she blurred into, then away from him, and her words echoed in my head over and over.

I wrenched myself away from her, only to find a row of people lined up, like ghosts just awaiting their chance to get to me. Landon was there, his head bloody and an eye missing. Evelyn, a matching bloody mess with a bleeding heart and a ghoulish glow. Lauren and Colton, blurring as my brain tried to get rid of them. Blythe, in a formal blue dress, sneering as she pointed me out to Jeanine.

Everything worsened when Daniel walked behind them, looking lost and unhappy, and my father and Harrison joined him. Their group was completed when Eric showed up, and it hit me that they were all here to watch me die.

Violent and lovely, the nightmare waned and intensified with each second. My brain fought it; at some point, it realized I was dreaming and it struggled to wake me up. Eric's face turned unrecognizable, and when he looked at me, he called me Ashley.

"Fuck." I throw the covers off me, feeling suddenly hot and sick and I swear he says her name in his sleep. It's unlikely. He'd only ever spoken poorly of her, and insisted I was the only one who'd ever spent the night.

None of this is comforting as I rush into his bathroom, desperate for cool air and some water.

It makes it all worse.

The bright light makes me wince, and the cold tile sends a wave of pure, unending intense nausea through me. I glance around in a panic, fairly certain I'm about to die.

I don't.

Not entirely.

Just a little, when Eric calls out my name in sleepy confusion, right as I throw up in his pristine bathroom.

"What's the last name?"

The nurse blinks at me. She's unrecognizable except for dark scrubs and a name badge with the Dauntless logo. She's already given me a few things to take: something for the nausea, something for the headache, and a glass of water.

I took all of them willingly, even going as far to surrender my arm to being stabbed again.

"Coulter."

Eric grits out the answer between clenched teeth. His shirt is warm against my cheek, and his arms are around me, daring the nurse to try and come any closer.

"Everly…Coulter?" The nurse looks over at him in pure confusion, and I'm shocked he doesn't leap off the table and kill her right then and there. "Is she your…your…"

The poor nurse struggles to come up with an acceptable family member for me to be. Spouse is clearly not on her list, and I can see her hovering somewhere between sister and long-lost cousin.

"I'm his wife," I answer lowly, feeling better. The horrible feeling from earlier is gone, and I chalk it up to stress. I'd been struggling with my place in Eric's life, in Dauntless, and trying to make friends. I was happy Four seemed to accept what was going on, but I was worried Jeremy would have him killed. I hadn't heard from Christina in a few days and combined with the dinner with Blythe and Eric's secret meeting, a little nausea wasn't unexpected.

"You're married?" She looks at Eric only, ignoring my scowl from the safety of his chest. "I thought you were –"

"Is this relevant? My wife is sick. Get me Arlene and get the fuck out of here," Eric snarls, and my third visit to the infirmary proves to go just as poorly as the others. Though this time, it's less me and more over Eric's marital status. "Do you need me to repeat myself?"

"No, I just…when did you get married?" The nurse is stupidly brave. She closes my chart with a hint of despair, and her eyes widen. "Sorry, Arlene is off but…I'll get…I'll get…uh –"

"I'm here. I got called in." Arlene bursts through the door as if on cue, and her eyes are wild with lack of sleep. "What happened to Everly? Is she okay? Did she fall off the bed?"

"She threw up," Eric answers loudly. "I want you to fix that."

"Fix what?" Arlene grabs the chart from the nurse and shoos her away. The first nurse throws Arlene a desperate look as she pleads to stay, but Arlene ignores her in favor of reading the scarce notes written by my questionable name. "What am I fixing?"

"That she doesn't feel good," Eric retorts, and his arms tighten inward on me. "Isn't that your job here?"

Arlene stares at both of us, and I feel a speck of guilt. Eric's rudeness only masks his panic. Once he knew I'd gotten sick, he'd stared at me like I'd announced I would be dead within minutes. He threw his shirt and a pair of his boxers at me, and he'd brought me to the last place I wanted to go after revisiting my dinner.

Luckily, there was no wait.

Eric and I were escorted right back, and the triage nurse had my vitals before I could blink. The nurse who had been struggling with my name was kicked out, and now Arlene was gifted with the task of making sure I wasn't sick.

Which, even I knew, was impossible.

There was a chance it was something Eric wasn't thinking about; I could have the flu, I could have food poisoning, I could have some weird, crazy virus no one had ever heard of.

Or, this could be the result of sleeping with Eric without a care in the world.

"Yes, my job here is solely to wait on you and your wife. Everly, are you alright? Are you feverish? Dizzy? Are you seeing spots?"

"None of that is helpful," Eric barks, and I focus on the maze-like pattern on his arm. I trace it with one finger, wondering if the particular shape meant anything. "Just…make it so she's not sick."

"I'm trying!" Arlene barks back, and she looks at him like he's insane. "You know what? Maybe you should wait in the lobby. There are a million reasons someone might get sick, but I have to start somewhere and you have to let go of her."

Eric is silent, and my fingers graze over his skin to his wrist. He pulls me closer to him, unwilling to let her near me.

"Do us all a favor and let go of Everly so I can take her temperature. Let me run a few tests. I promise you, I can make her feel better, but only if I know what's wrong." Arlene stares at both of us, me, feeling less queasy as I lean against him, and him dressed in whatever he'd thrown on. I wonder if she'd ever seen him like this, half dressed in boxers and a shirt, or if he only came down here looking invincible.

"Did you really ban Rylan?" I look up at Arlene as she steps closer, and there is no hesitation to her. She reaches for my arm, pressing a few spots, and I know what's coming. "What if he gets hurt?"

"Then he can come back. I banned him from acting like a moron. Max gave him some new assignments so hopefully he'll find that more interesting than changing all my charts." Arlene pauses where she'd stuck the needle in my arm last time, and we all jump when Eric's phone rings.

Everyone is quiet.

It rings again, insistently.

"Aren't you going to get it?"

"It's three am," Eric snaps, and but he relents. He manages to keep his arms around me to grab the phone, and whoever is on the other ends get one hell of a dark what.

Their answer does not please him.

"Shit. I'll be…actually, get Jason and Rylan down there first. I'll be there as soon as I can."

Their protest falls on deaf ears as Eric struggles to come up with a reason why he can't be there asap. They keep saying something, the tiny voice insistent, and finally Eric sighs.

"I'm with Everly in the infirmary. I'll be there as soon as we're done."

His words end the call, but not Arlene's exam.

"I'm going to redo your bloodwork. Do you want Eric to stay, or do you want him to go? Whatever is easier for you," she scribbles down a few orders, and moves to the door to call out for someone to come help her. "Everly?"

"I'm fine. You can go," I crane my head up to look at Eric, and his glare tells me he doesn't want to leave.

He'd watched me brush my teeth like he was afraid I'd vanish. Our walk down here had been pretty quiet, and very quick. It seemed he knew a faster route, and I wasn't sure if he was afraid I'd get sick again, or he just wanted to know what was wrong.

"I'm alright, I promise." My fingers still on his arm, still wrapped around me, still refusing to let go. "I'll call you as soon as I'm done. Was the call important?"

"Security breach," he mutters, and his gaze drops to my hand on him. "The concern is the person threw out Evelyn's name over and over, and there's a chance something is starting up. Are you sure you'll be alright?"

His concern, and extreme reluctance to leave, is heartwarming. I couldn't imagine Landon sitting in an infirmary with me or being this patient. He'd insist it was all in my head, and probably chastise me for wasting his time when he had to work. It's a weird shock when I remember he's not even alive anymore, but it doesn't matter. Even my own mother would have given me some tea and told me to go back to bed.

"I think so. I feel way better now. It might be something I ate," I smile up at his stormy sneer, and he still doesn't let go. "Go find what the ghost of Evelyn is doing. She's the reason I got sick anyway. I was dreaming of her."

He throws me a weird look, but his grip lessens slightly. "I'll be back in twenty. Don't try to walk home without me if you feel sick. Have Arlene call me."

"Promise." I lean back when he presses his lips to my hair, and he slides away from me. I dislike the cold feeling that follows, but I know he has no choice.

He'll either wait here until Arlene is done and spend more time on the security breach or go there now and hopefully be done at the same time.

He must agree.

Eric throws me one last look before he heads out through the doors, and I sigh in surrender as another nurse shows up with the same set of needles and vials as the last time I was down here. I give up my arm without asking, and half an hour later, I slip out of the room and right into Rylan.

"I thought you got banned."

I whisper while he and I walk, and he grins as he takes me along a route I don't know. We seem to be going the opposite way I came in here, and he ignores my suggestion to go back the other way. Arlene had given me paperwork, a return appointment, and something to take if I felt sick again. She informed me she'd call me in a few hours, and insisted I go home and go back to sleep.

I was going to, but I ran into Rylan first, and he cheerfully informed me Eric had sent him to come walk me home.

"I did get banned. But she can't keep me out of here forever. It's against the law," Rylan loudly declares, and he waves at a few nurses yawning as we walk past them. "I didn't mean to mess up all her files. I just wanted Jason's report to come back as a positive pregnancy test. I thought it would be hilarious."

"Where is he?" I yawn as we turn the corner, and my eyes widen as we head straight through a room full of patients waiting to be seen. Rylan nods hello at the ones who greet him, and he walks even faster as we exit out a door marked Staff. "Eric said something about a security breach."

"He's with Eric. Some lunatic was caught ranting about the work of Evelyn and how it can't be undone. He said you by name and Eric, so they thought it was best to call him in. But don't worry. Eric has minimal patience right now. I wouldn't expect him to be there much longer. He basically had the guy hauled in for crashing into our gate and then held on grounds for interrogation and threatening you." Rylan and I walk through the doorway into a different side of the hallway, and he winks. "Staff entrance and exit. Molly showed me once. She told me never to use it, but what's the fun in going out the regular door."

"You're right," I catch his smile, and he looks down to make sure I'm following him. "Regular doors are pretty boring."

"I knew you were smart. Eric said you were short, but he forgot to mention smart," Rylan snickers, and true to his word, he heads in the direction of Eric's apartment. "How are you feeling? Good? Someone said you barfed and Eric got all riled up. I can't remember if he has a phobia of vomit or just can't stand the thought of you being sick."

"I did throw up, but it could be from anything. I think maybe it was something I ate," I follow him closely, pausing while he pushes the call button for the elevator. "He was really worked up in the exam room."

"This might come as a shock to you, but Eric loathes being down there. I think he's traumatized from his father working in a hospital and his mother acting like she owned the place. Also, because he's clingy and he's worried something is wrong."

The elevator doors ding, loud in the quiet hallway, and Rylan waits for me to go in first.

"I'm not that sick," I frown at him, but he's unconvinced. "What? You think I'm sick?"

"I think I'm finally going to get to be a godfather. It's the only thing in my life I haven't accomplished," Rylan announces, and he jabs the button for the sixth floor. Then the fifth. Also the second through ninth. "Eric is my best friend which means I'm automatically in the baby's life forever. Even if you have a best friend back in Amity. Or here. Someone said you knew Jake. That's fine, but he can't have my job."

"I do know Jake, but what are you talking about?" I stare up at Rylan, his brown hair pulled up and off his face. His uniform jacket is opened to reveal a bright green shirt, and it clashes with the blue stripe on his jacket sleeve. "You think he would be the godfather of…"

"Your baby!" Rylan's eyes light up, hopeful as ever. "Even if it's not right now, I'd still like to claim the job. I can keep your baby safe. Jake cannot. He proved this last week, when he accidentally freed a squirrel from a trap."

"I see," I try not to laugh at this, because Rylan is dead serious with his quest to be Eric's child's godparent. "I don't think Jake would mind. He's very nice and –"

"Motherfucker!" Rylan swears at his phone, but answers on the second ring. "Hold on. I have to take this. I got in trouble for not answering my phone last week and -Hey, I'm with Everly. We're almost to your apartment. Did they get everything processed? No. Oh good. Great. I'd love to do paperwork all night. I've only been up since three am two days ago."

His sigh is loud in the elevator.

"I'll make sure she gets home. I already promised. See you in ten."

He ends the call with a groan, then turns to face me.

"Eric says hello and he misses you dearly. Not in those exact words, but I summarized for him."

"Is he stuck with whoever showed up?" I smile at Rylan's enthusiasm, and the doors chime as we reach the second floor. He immediately pushes the close button, and the elevator takes off toward the third floor.

His answer is still cheerful, but knowing.

"Of course, he is."

Days later, I watch the initiates receive their ranks with the rest of the faction.

I thought I'd missed this part, but Eric explained that once the fear landscapes were done, Lauren was the only one left to finalize all the scores. The initiation routinely would have ended that very day, but with Four losing his memory, the other leaders all busy, and Lauren working around the clock to get caught up, it was pushed back a few days to make sure there were no errors.

It also explained Lauren's rage at me. She'd been working nonstop to finish, and now, her efforts were dulled by Eric and Max standing to the side, watching the former initiation class mill around. Once the rankings are announced, their evening will take a drastic turn for the more exciting. Rylan already announced a few parties were starting, but the final one would culminate on the roof, where he was most excited to go.

"We're incredibly behind this year. Amity did their final initiation the day after Harrison got there," Max lowly informs Eric, but I hear him, too. "He said it went well. Not a single person failed."

"They aren't failing here, either," Eric reminds him.

His arms are behind his back, and if I didn't know him, he'd look very intimidating. Because I do know him, I recognize the brand new haircut, buzzed impossibly shorter and gelled into place, and the uniform Carol dropped off. I watched him lace up his boots while he sat on the edge of the bed, and I watched him smirk at me when I walked closer, asking him if we'd be late.

We weren't.

We arrived right on time. The leaders were standing in all sorts of vantage spots, and Eric was immediately whisked away by Max to listen to a discussion on what they were doing with all the initiates. Turns out, most were staying. Rather than creating their own enemies, like Eric once pointed out, they would be using almost everyone. A few of the lowest ranking ones would be kicked out, but not made factionless.

They were being sent to live and work in Amity.

"How are you doing Everly? Did you enjoy watching the fear landscapes? This must all be very different from the initiation you were in," Max focuses on me, but his stare is pretty pleased. He'd been happy when I walked in with Eric, and he stayed that way, even now, as we move to the side so a new wave of members could head further in. "Eric mentioned you were adjusting well, which is a good thing."

My smile is immediate, and so is the curiosity over Max's approval on all this. I knew little about him, had only met him a handful of times, but I'd discovered he whole heartedly seemed to approve of my marriage to Eric. In fact, he seemed to really like it, to the degree where he'd willing let Eric bring me in on the orders of a fake arrest, and marry me a day later.

"I really like Dauntless. It is different, but it's far better than Amity."

Max and Eric exchange a look. I'd feel left out, but their stares mirror each other's relief.

"Good. Harrison said you'd be a natural here." Max nods a hello to Karl and his friends as they excitedly wait for the big reveal. "He seems content in Amity."

"He should be. He loves Amity," Eric says lowly, and he glances at me out of the corner of his eye. I force a smile back because we both know Harrison is a sore subject for me.

I might not have thrown up again, but I'd spent the past day feeling sort of down. Eric finally realized I was fine, just bummed my real father was in the faction I'd left, and there was nothing he could do to fix this. Harrison's assignment had been made permanent; he was to stay there until further notice, and once he finished up his final paperwork with Dauntless, he'd return to Amity to oversee it full time.

Turns out, he was a big hit.

He handled everything far easier than Johanna did, and he'd made vast changes in a short amount of time. Every camera now worked. There were none lagging or blinking on and off, and for once, Dauntless had a clear idea of all things Amity. My mother had a larger medical center, with slightly more advanced medicine and a new assistant. I'd overheard them saying she protested at first, but gave in when Harrison promised her she could help more people this way. Harrison had also changed a few of the delivery schedules, gave away a few cows which were nearing retirement, and he replaced Carole's chickens with more chickens. May got some extra ducks, my father got the surprise of his life when Harrison insisted he let some lady named Kerrie stay with him, and from what I gathered, things were going really well.

They were going well in Dauntless, too.

It was just a different kind of well.

"Maybe we can go visit him," I suggest, but it's drowned out by the cries as Lauren shows up, looking tired and irritable. Her eye is dark where Four punched her, and the makeup she's smeared on top does little to cover it.

She glowers as she walks, and once the room falls silent, she wordlessly pushes a button to light up the board. The names reveal themselves one by one, and I watch in pure fascination at the rankings. There's something brutal about how they're scored, and even more so by how they're up against their peers. My thoughts on forming an army were a little different; I would think they'd have to work together and pitting them against one another had to create some violent conflicts.

I can see it has.

Jake is ranked second.

The look on his face is a flash of utter disbelief. Weeks of hard work has paid off to rank him second, but it must sting that he's not first. His disappointment is fleeting at best. His expression soon turns joyous, and he beams when someone congratulates him.

Karl slaps him on the shoulder, and the two of them point to his name in the first spot. Karl's friends, CJ and Kevin, stick to the side, and both hold a sour expression as they're ranked fifth and sixth. The rest of the names are a blur to me, but it's easy to figure out who's who. A girl named Lee seethes in a fit of rage as she ranks nineteenth, but a girl named Dizzy crows when she's ranked third. Karl and Jake congratulate her immediately, and they both miss two red headed girls trying to get their attention.

Ultimately, most are happy they're staying. The lowest ranking ones are smaller and less agile, and most appear relieved when it's revealed they'll be heading to Amity. One of the girls weeps with joy at learning she's not factionless, and the guy beside her takes her by the hand and pulls her into the crowd. I watch them until I can't see them, and they're gone before I realize someone has started passing out drinks, and someone else has started the music.

"You guys coming?" Jason yells, and he runs past Eric and me with his arms full of bottles. They clink as he runs, and he laughs when people begin yanking them away from him.

The feeling of joy is absolutely contagious.

It rises up, spreading quickly through the members. It bounces off the walls, skims over the floors, and vibrates so loudly I can feel it beneath my feet. The crowd grows louder when Lauren walks away, flipping most of them off and yelling for them to save their questions about their scores for another day. It grows even louder when Four wanders out, and his eyes take in the sight before him.

He's not entirely unimpressed. He seems to share my sense of awe at how this works, but there's something else behind his stare that wasn't there the other day.

I tilt my head at him, noticing his hair is a wreck. His shirt is crooked, like he'd pulled it on a second ago, and his boots are untied. He surveys the group before him with mild interest, and he smiles at a few who call out his name. His smile grows wider when Tris finds him, and they talk for a few seconds. She still doesn't look great; her skin is pale and sallow, and her eyes are tired, but they both look reasonably better than the last time I saw them.

Her shirt is crooked, too, and her hair might be even worse than his.

Still, they both look far happier as they choose to leave together. Four's stare catches mine, and he winks as he takes off after Tris. It's a terrible wink, but it's the least of my concerns.

I watch as he reaches out to take Tris by the hand, and so does Jeremy.

Pure joy is a lot of things.

It's the feeling the initiates, now members, have as they drunkenly stumble past me to go find their apartments. It's the sweet drink Rylan brought me, winking and telling me it's safe and nonalcoholic, along with the crackers Jason rummaged. It's the hug of Christina, crushing me with a shrieking yelp followed by a string of swears that she's been working so freaking much and she's so sorry but Rylan told her I got sick and has my hair always been that long and where did I get my dress but can we go to lunch tomorrow. It's Meghan, shyly inching closer, not at all drunk, and softly asking me if she and I could have dinner sometime. Just us, not Jason or Eric.

It's the weird way that I do fit in here, even without a job or an actual conclusion to Arlene's test, but mostly, it's Eric.

When the music is the loudest, and Meghan does finally have a drink, and Christina lets it slip that Tris went home from work early because she didn't feel good, Eric wraps his arms around me. He slides them around my waist, pulling me back toward him. He's warm even with the heavy uniform jacket off, and solid as I lean against him.

His fingers move quickly. They skim my arm until they find the tender spot where Arlene took more blood, and the stark bruise that has yet to fade. They press above and below, then down to my forearm, my wrist, then my hips.

He pulls me back silently, resting the bottom of his jaw on the top of my head, and ignoring Jason's joke about my being short coming in handy. He coaxes me further, until my shoes hit his boots, and he's certain I'm not going to fall.

There is joy in all of this.

Rylan, balancing a dark amber bottle on his head as someone tries to shoot it off. Arlene, lurking in the shadows with a look of dismay as someone yells not to use a real bullet, but maybe something else. Linda, making a rare appearance to congratulate her nephew on passing initiation, and there is zero shame from him when she hugs him, fiercely, and whispers she'll put in a good word with Max.

There is more joy when Eric's fingers move from my hip to my abdomen. He splays them wider for just a moment, so fleeting I would miss it if I weren't paying attention before he yanks me back further to press his mouth to my cheek.

His kiss is sloppy; he smells good, like cold air and whatever warm bourbon he's been drinking, and there's even more warmth to this rare display of very public affection. It's impossible to miss, and he knows it.

He says my name quietly, pressing it against my skin, and then he stays there with a low hum of pure content.

The joy lasts for a few days.

I finally summon up the courage to tell Eric I want to find a job here, and I figure he might have an idea. I think about it on my entire walk to the infirmary, down to the very words I'm going to say. It wasn't that he'd rebuke the idea, but maybe that he'd worry it wasn't safe.

Since the guy showed up at the gates, Eric's worry ramped itself up ten times over. He did his best to downplay it, but I was constantly surrounded by someone. Jason, Rylan, Eric himself, more often than not Christina. I liked all of them, so it didn't bother me, but I wasn't stupid.

Jason stood in a store while I picked out a shirt for Eric for a good hour, and Rylan spent forty-eight minutes, counted out loud, one by one, sitting on Eric's bathtub while I dried my hair.

I figured maybe I could work with one of them, or at the very least, they'd know something relatively safe and boring for me to start with. I practice telling Eric how I should contribute, or at the very least, maybe I could help Four if he ever got his memory back. I liked this idea the best, but Eric might like it the worst.

The thought makes me smile, which is needed considering Arlene called me twelves times to make sure I was coming down here. She said she needed to see me in person, and this couldn't be done over the phone.

I assumed it was the test results from the bloodwork. I told her fine, and I went down at the time she told me. My check-in is quicker than quick, and Molly waves me back to the same place Rylan tried to show me. I ask her to clarify twice, and when I still don't have a clue as to where Arlene's office is, I nod anyway and assure Molly I can find it.

I follow the maze of hallways the way I think they should go. Left, left, right, left, right again, straight down a dark hallway with crazy looking rooms, and a sharp right into the annex of the infirmary. I stop when I reach a section marked Employees only, security clearance needed, and I glance around.

Unfortunately, nothing is familiar.

This area is dark, set much farther back than I'd imagined, and creepy. I turn around to head back toward the main part of the clinic, but I can't remember which way I came from. I take a wild guess to go right, and I crash right into someone walking in the opposite direction.

I look up in total surprise, and I'm met with one wide eyed, concerned stare.

"I'm sorry! I didn't see you! Everly, are you alright?"

I nod, unable to say a single word, not even hello.