I spent time with my family. Playing with Judith, listening as Carl updated me on the gossip of our little community. I smiled as I watched Michonne and Dad curled into each other, and I listened when Dad told me that he'd been surprised that Negan had agreed to have our wedding in Alexandria.
I had to bite back the fact that it had been part of a delaying tactic gone wrong. I was burning with curiosity, this time about what my wedding was going to look like. What had they planned and prepared? I hadn't gotten to look around outside before darkness fell. They'd kept me on the path from the gate to Dad's house.
Now I wondered. Just what did Negan think our wedding should look like? Since Michonne had mentioned I needed to write my vows, I suspected that Gabe may be officiating, but it was still going to be Negan's show. I wondered what his would sound like? How many fucks can one man put in his wedding vows before they don't count?
No one would clue me in. Sworn to secrecy, or just torturing the pregnant woman I'd never know. And so, after another long hug from everyone, I was sent off to my former bedroom. Given a stack of blank paper and a pen, and told that Negan had made sure I had extra clothes and underwear, that they were in my former dresser waiting.
I took a minute to shower, after grabbing some comfy clothes from what he'd packed for me. Getting the sweat and sleep washed away, I returned to my room and sat down on the new bed. It wasn't nearly as decadent as ours back home, and I smiled when I realized that the Sanctuary was my home now. Negan was my home.
And so, with that thought in mind, I put the pen to the blank paper and started to write out my vows.
I slept better than I thought I would once I was finished. Waking up the next day, unsure of where I was for a beat since the light came from the wrong direction and the bed felt wrong. My mind played catch up, and my dress was still swaying in the breeze from the crack in the window. I had to make a mad dash to the bathroom, baby demon reminding me of who was in charge, and then I came back to my room and thought about what today would mean.
Mom's rings were still around my neck, and I unclasped the chain and pulled it off. I held up her wedding set, letting the sun bounce off of the stones and cast rainbows on the wall. Mom wouldn't have imagined Negan for me, but he met her requirements for putting her rings on my finger. I wondered who was our ring bearer. Was Judith our flower girl? Did Michonne know that I would have no one save her stand by my side as my maid of honor?
Did Negan pick a best man? Would our wedding have all the little touches that I hadn't seen since years before the world changed over?
Michonne and Dad knocked on my door as I sat thinking about the day ahead. Calling out a welcome, they entered with a glass of juice in hand. "Morning, sweetheart," Dad offered, handing me the glass and kissing my forehead. "Today's the day, huh?"
I shook my head before taking a drink. "Unbelievable, isn't it?"
Michonne and Dad kept me company, offering me breakfast, and giving me a better idea of what the day would entail. A day of beauty for Michonne, Judith, and me. Dad and the boys were putting the finishing touches on everything, and I was warned to stay inside. Great, I thought, caged again.
And so, my wedding day played out as one may have before the dead rose and started biting. I was bathed, pampered, plucked, and prepared. My hair was braided down my shoulder and twisted with fresh flowers, honeysuckle and roses. Negan had provided underwear fit for a blushing bride that was home to a five month fetus, pretty and yet also functional.
Michonne had a gorgeous dress of wine colored lace, which looked spectacular against her skin tone. We added ribbons to her hair, creating a vision that would rival my own. And my baby sister had a tiny dress of the same color, flaring out over her pudgy little legs. As our flower girl, she would be rolled along in front of me in a little wagon, and Michonne giggled telling me she'd practiced her flower toss.
The time came, as the sun was full overhead, for my dress to come down over my head and with a glance in the mirror I knew I was as ready as I ever would be. Handed a bouquet that matched the flowers in my hair, I stepped out onto the porch where I first laid eyes on Negan and met my dad.
The rest was a blur. The walk to the gazebo where Gabe and Negan waited. Giving Mom's rings to Carl when Dad told me he was indeed the ring bearer. The flowers match mine and seemly everywhere. The music that seemed to come from everywhere. And there he was. He had ditched his usual uniform and dressed in a button down black shirt and black trousers, I felt my mouth go completely dry. Negan waiting at the altar, for me.
The only parts that are clear as a bell was hearing his vows to me, coming out of the mouth I loved, in that voice that melted me, they'd be burned into my memory forever. Negan took my hand as I handed my bouquet to Michonne, and raised it to his lips and brushed a kiss on my knuckles.
"When I first walked through the gates here, I never expected to find you. The one person in this entire world that would change everything I thought I knew about myself. I was sure that I didn't NEED to have any emotional connections, not now, not here, not anymore. And then, I saw you sitting right over there," I followed his finger pointing to Dad's house. "And every fucking part of my life changed."
"You have held me in the palm of your hand from the first moment you spoke. The way you weren't intimidated by me. The way you wouldn't cower, or bow. The way you held me accountable for every poor fucking decision I made here, or anywhere. You changed me for the better." His eyes were locked on mine and I could completely forget our audience as he spoke.
"I would have handed you everything I own, everything I hold within my power, for nothing more than the promise that you'd consider being with me. And when we found out that you have my baby growing strong inside of you, that you were giving me something that I never hoped to dream of, your power increased over me. And yet, you never once abused it. Never once pushed for more than you thought I'd concede. Never once did you press for more than you thought I'd be comfortable giving you." I smiled up at him, feeling the tears burning behind my eyelids.
"And so, today, in front of God and every fucking one, I will finally say something that I've held back. For too fucking long. I love you, Callie Grimes. I will love you until my heart stops beating. I will love you until we are finally ready to fucking leave this world behind, and I hope to God that we're together until the very end, that we take our final breaths together, because whether I end up in Hell or Heaven, I don't want to go without you beside me." The tears that were threatening became a reality, running down my cheeks as I made no noise.
"Since these are our vows to one another, let me add this: I will promise to love, honor, and give you every part of me. AND I promise to attend to every fucking need you have," he leaned in to stage whisper to me, "especially that thing I do with my tongue that you like so fucking much."
I laughed through my tears. Of course, it wouldn't be Negan if he didn't say something inappropriate. I looked up at him and whispered, "You ass." swiping the tears away, I kept his hand in mine, as I continued, "I never expected to love you. Yet here we are. I never expected that YOU would be the man that would make mornings worth facing. Yet here we are. I never expected that I'd find comfort and safety in your arms. Yet here we are. I never once thought that I'd be excited to become a mother, to YOUR child. Yet here we are." His eyes were still on mine as I kept going. Finally saying everything I'd held back.
"The first time you walked through those gates, I made a choice. It was a choice that would change both of us, forever. I could have gone inside and waited with Judith. Hidden, as I'm more than certain Dad expected and wanted me to. I didn't. My insatiable need to compare who you were versus what I'd been told you were, overrode logic and reasoning. Meeting you, combating your confidence with my impressive vocabulary,"the chuckles from our audience matched the twinkle in his eyes, "and fighting against the pull of your overwhelming magnetism," more laughter and his dimples came out to play. "Going so far as scarring myself for life," I held up my hand to show those fucking prong marks. "None of that prepared me for loving you."
"You take my breath away, Negan. Every single time your eyes meet mine, I feel it. The very breath pulling from me. Every time your skin touches mine, it goes. And there's a saying, "Life is not measured by the amount of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." If that's true, then my life began when I met you. And it will end when we take our last breath together. Because if I agree with anything you've ever said, then your feeling about the afterlife without me, is how I feel about it without you. If we can't be here or there together, then I'll pass." I smiled up at him as he stared down at me.
"I love you, Negan. I didn't expect it. I didn't ask for it. I didn't even necessarily want it. Yet I do. With every single fiber of my being." My voice was strong and clear. "Now the promises and vows: Negan, I promise to love, honor, and give you every single part of my being. I will stand beside you, today, tomorrow, and at the very end of time. All that I am, all that I will be, is yours. And," I mimicked his own stage whisper, "I'll even let you do that thing with your tongue I like so much."
The laughter rolled around us, and then our rings were exchanged, his looked vaguely familiar and I knew when his hand took mine and our rings flashed together, that Dad had given Negan his ring. To match Mom's. And that was the clearest blessing he'd given so far.
The reception was a true party. Tensions gone. Fear escaped. And we sat together happy despite my former worry. Negan had picked Simon to be his best man, and I knew it wasn't simply because of his place in the hierarchy of the Saviors. Negan had listened to my warnings and applied them to Simon as well as Dwight. As the speeches began, I took note of the ease that Negan sat with, and that Lucille had been gussied up for the occasion as well. Pretty sure he'd even added some baby's breath to her shiny appearance.
Simon went first. And I took a long drink of water as I waited for a shoe to drop. None did, but I had some cringing. He kept it short and mildly sweet.
"I'm sure that NONE of us expected today to happen. Most especially the bride and groom." Chuckles came at the reality of those words. "Negan can be brutal, terrifying, and absolutely paralyzing. And yet, we've all seen that come completely undone when Callie so much as swoons. He would and has killed for her. And I have absolutely no doubt that she would do the same for him." Thanks for the reminder, asshole. "And so, please join me in raising your glass to the happy couple. To Negan and Callie!"
A chorus of voices joined him. And then Michonne stood. I smiled at the woman who would be my stepmother. She giggled up at me as her smile shined. "I remember the first time I knew that Negan loved Callie. I'm pretty sure all of you were there, and it happened here. When Callie fainted," the embarrassment of the memory burned my face and I hid it in Negan's arm as he grinned. "I thought Negan would tear the house apart to get her inside. The word 'overreaction' comes to mind. Then, the following morning, when she scarred her hand so elegantly, it happened again. Negan rushing to her, his fear so palpable that you could almost taste it. And I knew, even if he didn't, even if he didn't use the words to say it until today, that he loved her." She took a breath and kept her smile.
"And Callie, when did I know that you wanted him as much? That you loved him too? Every excuse, every time you tried denying it, every stubborn moment you fought it. Why was that your tell? Because, Callie, that is you in a nutshell. You fight, both for and against, what you love. And boy did you love Negan." Her head shakes at the very thought.
"I knew you were pregnant before you did. And I knew, even without that added beating heart, that you were done for with him. It wasn't a matter of if, only when you'd go with him. And so, today we celebrate your love for one another." She turned her eyes on Negan. "I don't think a reminder is necessary of what you will face if she's harmed by you simply because I think you'd rather die yourself than allow harm to come to her. And for that reason, I welcome you, Negan to our family." She raised her glass and gave another, "Another toast, to the happy couple. To Callie and Negan!"
Again the cheers of a chorus of voices flowed over us. I felt Negan's lips on my temple and offered him my lips. A kiss and more cheers. Jesus.
Dad came next, and I smiled at him in his own button down shirt. "Who knew we'd be here one day? Not just because my beautiful daughter is marrying Negan, of all people," more laughter, Jesus, were we that hilarious? "But because I never ever saw her as truly grown up."
Negan's snort had me shaking my head.
"Callie will forever be the tiny red haired dynamo that came out screaming and hasn't stopped voicing her opinion since. The little girl that begged for piggy back rides, that hated sharing her toys with her baby brother, even after she'd outgrown them. The little girl with popsicle stains around her mouth, a hand on her hip, and a dare for any bully twice her size on the street we lived on. Even now that she has her own little one growing inside her, she will always be my little girl." I smiled down at Dad, listening to him reminisce about me.
"I never would have guessed that Negan would be the one who'd win her heart. Which was an oversight on my part, because looking back, he would probably be the only one that had the nerve and strength to keep her heart safe. The two of you, what you have, is what Callie's mother wanted for her. I can see it when you look at one another. The same love and devotion that Lori and I shared, once upon a time." I smiled at his logic and his acceptance.
"My advice, for both of you, is this: Never take it for granted. This love and passion you have, because nothing is guaranteed in this life. Nothing. But I know that I don't have to advise either of you on this, because Callie's seen it firsthand, and I have a feeling that so have you, Negan. Treat each other like best friends, lovers, and partners, and you'll never have a moment's regret." I felt my tears return "I love you, Callie, and while my heart hurts at having to give you away, knowing that you picked someone strong enough to keep you safe and content makes it all the easier. And now, if you'll all join me in a toast, to my beautiful daughter Callie, and her husband, Negan!"
More cheers, and I was brushing tears away. Negan stood and I was thinking that I wouldn't survive more of the sappiness he'd shown in his vows. I should have known better. "Wow. Shit. I feel like I gave my all with my fucking vows, babe." He shot me a shiteating grin. Fuck. "Oh well, here I go. I married Callie today, after having to negotiate for the wedding harder than I have ever fucking negotiated anything in my whole damn life. She drives a hard bargain, and she knows my limits, but she clearly didn't know how badly I wanted this." I bit my lip, trying to hold back the laughter that was threatening to escape.
"Our child was conceived here, in Alexandria, in Rick's laundry room to be specific. Hell, I'm pretty damn sure you guys know the date better than we do, she's just that fucking LOUD. And so, when Callie made getting married here part of her negotiations that was simple. What's good enough for Baby Negan, is fucking good enough for Daddy Negan." For fuck's sake, was he trying to make me piss my self?
"Then she countered with having Father Creepy, um, Gabe officiate. And while he's creepy as shit, collar and that fucking smile," he paused and gave a dramatic shiver, "totally worth dealing with to get here. She never imagined that I'd be able to pull this together, and I'm fucking certain she didn't think that her daddy there would aid and abet me in the whole shebang, but here we are, princess, here we are."
I was practically vibrating from holding the giggles back. "I guess the point is this: I finally have the woman I plan on living the rest of my fucking life with, and I plan on spending every fucking minute of it that I don't have other fucking responsibilities to deal with balls deep in appreciation of her. And I do mean, balls fucking deep." I was biting my lip so hard I thought I'd start bleeding soon, and he fucking winked at me. Then tossing his drink back in one shot, he threw out the final line and I had to fucking let go, "Can we start the honeymoon now?"