Warning: Chapters will continue to get darker, but there are happy endings coming!
"You better have an important update for me," Wayzac hissed to the blue holograph person that stood in front of her. "I'm rather busy today."
"I'm sure you would find it interesting to know that they are coming after you again," the holograph stated.
Wayzac rolled her eyes. "I'm not an idiot. I know that as long as I have Ben Solo, they will keep coming back."
"They said that they were going to use the Vergence Scatter to find you."
Wayzac's eyes widened as her heart jumped in her chest. "It's real," she whispered, leaning against the control panel that was in front of her in the transmission's room. This was her yes. The proof she had been looking for that she was moving in the right direction. She looked back up at the hologram before her that was standing on a round reading plate. "Did they say anything else?"
"They know how to access the entree. They did not discuss the matter further, Supreme Leader."
"Damn it," she grumbled under her breath. "No matter. I'm sure I can drag something out of him." She waved away the subject with a wave of her hand. "Remember our deal."
"I have not forgotten the terms," the holograph said.
"Then I expect an update quickly."
"Of course, Supreme Leader."
Wayzac disconnected the communication, cutting off the hologram in its bow to her and she exhaled deeply, trying to wrap her mind around all of this new information. This was the break that she had been waiting for. Something to take them to the next level, something to get the First Order back on top. This would be something that would take those annoying Rebels far more than the three misfits to take care of.
She glanced around the empty room that had seats around the reading plate. Normally each seat would have been filled, but in the early morning hours she had found the emptiness of the room comforting in a strange way.
She let out another deep breath and left the room how she had found it and walked the dark halls, wandering about until she found herself at the door to her room that her legs must have subconsciously led her to.
She entered the room that was shrouded in black, removing her gloves, jacket and shoes and dropped onto her bed, pulling her blanket in tight to her chest as she curled up. Her eyes slid shut and she permitted herself to fall into the kind memory, if only for a moment.
Arms tight around her in this same bed. A warmth at her back, hot breath at her neck. If she imagined hard enough she could feel the shape of his body perfectly fit to hers, something she hadn't felt after that night. The night that she had made her choice. The night she gave all of it up only to be passed over once again in her life.
You're so beautiful.
Ren's voice wrapped around her, tugging at her dead heart, trying to breathe life into it.
You're so beautiful.
That man's breath smelt of death sticks, his hands pawing at her.
"You're so beautiful."
Wayzac froze, her heart thudding in her ears.
"I feel like I never told you that enough."
Wayzac shot upright in her bed and turned, one fist still clutching the blanket to her chest as a life reserve. She couldn't remember the last time she had heard that voice, but she was sure as hell that she had never wanted to hear it again and it scared her.
She pulled herself from the bed and tried to get to her feet, but her knees were weak and buckled beneath her. She lurched towards her desk and put all of her weight into it, eyes never leaving the woman that stood in front of her.
"You've truly blossomed. A proper young woman, Lilith."
"Don't call me that," Wayzac gasped out, finally finding her voice.
"Don't tell me you're still going by your father's name, Lilith."
Wayzac's father had been the only light she could remember in the dark world. A doll with tattered hair. A kind smile and warm embrace. A reminder that everything was alright until in a ball of fire they weren't anymore."
"Lilith is dead, mother!"
The woman gave an exasperated sigh, her hands clasping in front of her. Her clothes were ill fitting, tattered and worn. A dirty brown smock whose sleeves fell past her dainty hands and whose skirt hem had skimmed the floor so much that it was ragged and falling apart.
Her long red hair fell in familiar curls down her back and over her shoulders and her eyes shone brightly against her dirty cheeks. The black and purple lace around her neck stood out stark against her sickly pale skin.
"Let's not be dramatic."
Wayzac's knees trembled as she pushed herself up from her desk. She made sure that one hand stayed secure on the edge of the desk to keep her steady and upright. "You're not real," she whispered, closing her eyes. "You're not real." It was a chant, a prayer, a beg. "I killed you, you're not real!"
"I wanted to tell you that I was sorry."
Wayzac's eyes snapped open and a loud laugh ripped from her throat, her grasp on the desk tightening enough that her nails were cutting into the wooden face. "You're not sorry! You were never sorry."
"Lilith-"
"My name is not Lilith!" Wayzac shouted, her voice echoing back to her from the slick black walls. "I haven't been Lilith since the day you sold me off!"
"I was not the best mother. I'm sorry I was not better to you and your brother."
Wayzac couldn't stop a snort that left her nose. "Not the best? I'm sorry I didn't get you any awards."
Her mother's eyebrow rose, but she made no comment, just stared at Wayzac who refused to give her mother what she knew the woman wanted. She wasn't going to get an apology. There was no way in hell Wayzac would ever give that woman an apology.
"I'm sorry," her mother tried again. "Your father and I-"
"Don't talk about him."
"We're both happy of the woman you have become."
Wayzac fell silent, chin quivering as she pushed away the tears. Her free arm wrapped around her middle and she leaned forward feeling sick. Her hand at the desk continued to dig into the wood. A sound crackled from her throat and her eyes burned as they finally released her tears, her sobs loud. The hand at the desk went to her mouth and she bit down harshly on the skin just below her thumb.
The metallic taste of blood filled her mouth, but she didn't care. She just needed to wake up. This was just a nightmare. Just like she had every night. She would wake up and her mother would be gone. Her mother would be dead once again, where her mother belonged. She had been dead for 14 years and she wasn't suddenly back from the dead now.
So why was she still standing there when Wayzac looked back up with tear stained cheeks?
"What do you want from me?!" Wayzac gasped out.
"Hush now, Lilith," the woman scolded. "I thought I taught you better than to cry."
"Why are you here?!"
"I didn't want to miss my own daughter's crowning achievement. Becoming Queen of time and space is impressive."
"Don't act proud," Wayzac snarled, using the back of her hand to wipe at her eyes as she straightened up. She turned to her desk and desperately searched for something, anything that would wake her up. Anything to make this monster leave her alone. "I know what you really think of me. I was never worth anything to you."
"I think you're confused." Her mother's voice was concerned, hurt in a way, but Wayzac couldn't bring herself to care. "You're worth more than this-"
"I'm confused?" Wayzac closed her eyes wanting nothing more than to lie back in that bed and hide away under the covers, like she had on those long nights after being paid, held safely against her brother. The only thing they had ever had was each other and he ruined that! He was just like them! He had left her. Abandoned her. Betrayed her. "You pawned me away. You already told me how much I was worth. I'd say I'm in the three credits range, wouldn't you?"
"I love you, Lilith. I always have."
Wayzac trembled as her legs struggled to hold herself up right against the desk. Blood rushed in her ears. Tears poured down her cheeks, and she bit her bottom lip to keep from crying out, teeth bound to leave marks.
Her eyes shot open and her hand snatched up the first thing her eyes landed on. With all of the strength she could muster, she threw the shears towards her mother. The momentum sent her tumbling to her knees.
There was a shattering of glass, the full length mirror mounted on her closet door smashed into a thousand glittering fragments. Wayzac's eyes shut tight as the new knives fell softly over the floor and all around her. When her eyes finally fluttered open, she could see blood under her palms from prominent teeth marks.
She doesn't care. Couldn't bring herself to care. All that mattered was that she was free now. Her mother wasn't standing there any longer.
Wayzac's arms gave out under her and she lied against the cold dark floor among the mirror. She wasn't sure how long she had lied there, not that time truly mattered. She didn't care. Not right now.
She didn't need anyone. She could do this on her own. Make this galaxy what she wanted. And it could become whatever it needed to become, all that mattered was that she was at the top once and for all. That everyone knew what she had accomplished. That she had conquered the whole universe with only herself to thank. She had made this world bow to her will because she would never bow to anyone else ever again.
Wayzac inhaled deeply and lifted herself back up onto her knees. She hadn't lied earlier when she had said that she had things to do today. She had an appearance to make to the entire fleet that was still in working order to make her announcement and she still had information to get out of Ben and even if he could get out of that chair with ease, she knew that he wasn't going to break without working him for hours on end.
There was nothing wrong with that. With the amount of stress that was building up in Wayzac's chest, she needed an outlet. Ben was just the lucky volunteer.
Wayzac rose to her feet and stepped through the mirror, ignoring the sharp shooting pain as shards punctured into her bare feet. She stopped in front of the nearly empty frame that reminded her so much of that night Kylo had broken her other mirror in a fit of rage.
She stared at her reflection in the splintered spiders web. Her fingers gingerly traced the mark across her lips and up her cheek. He had ruined her. He had taken her beauty away from her. It had been her bargaining chip, her ladder to climb. It was how she got her way. How she got to where she was. And what was she without her beauty? What was she now?
Without her single saving grace, could she still rule the galaxy? Could she still hold onto this power if she didn't have anything to offer the world?
She would have to. She wouldn't let some confused little kid take this away from her. Beautiful or not, she was Queen. The Exogol throne was hers and no one else's. And if she couldn't rule with beauty and respect then she would rule with fear. She could twist it just the same.
And she would twist it, manipulate it until it was exactly what she wanted. Just as she always had. Just as she always would. She had been waiting for this moment for 27 years and some pretty boy with a flaming sword wasn't going to get in her way. Not anymore.
Ben coughed, doing his very best to push the pain away. All in all, he wasn't as badly off as he had thought he would be. Wayzac had eventually stormed off in anger from his taunting. He couldn't let her get the best of him, not like she used to. He would never escape her grasp.
He strained in the darkness against the straps around his wrists and ankles. All he had to do was focus enough on the force and he would be able to get out. It should be easy. So why was he having such a difficult time?
He closed his eyes with a deep breath, trying to center himself. What was it that Rey had always said? She could call on spirits any time she had wanted with such simple words.
"Be with me."
Ben jumped as the door opened and the light to the room turned fully on, leaving Ben blinking as his eyes adjusted to the sharp difference. When he finally could see, he was met with a disheveled Wayzac standing before him.
Her bun was falling out, her eyes red from crying. She wasn't wearing her normal black jacket and her milky white arms were nicked here and there, the marks looking fresh. Her right hand was bruised and had indents that looked like teeth had made them. Her left clutched a pair of shears tightly in her fist. Blood covered her palms. And she stood barefoot, crimson puddles forming beneath them. Ben's eyes followed the path that she had taken to walk into the room, her bloody footprints left glittering against the cold dark floor.
"Wayzac," he whispered, eyes finally returning to her face. "Are you alright?"
"Why are you asking?" she grumbled, hands becoming fists. "It's not like you've ever cared."
"Wayzac-"
"Where's the entrance to the Vergance Scatter?"
Ben couldn't help but stare at her, blinking. His chest constricted and he found it hard to breathe. How did she know? He hadn't said anything about it. A panic set through him at the thought that Rey could possibly be in danger over the fact that Wayzac supposedly had a spy with the Resistance. He hadn't fully believed her at first, thought she was trying to scare him, but now he knew it was true. She never would have come up with that place's name on her own.
"W-what?" he asked, eyes wandering her.
A sting filled his cheek as the back of her hand made contact against his cheek.
"Do not play games with me Ben. Where is the entrance to the Vergance Scatter? I know you know!"
He had never heard her voice like that before and when he looked back up, her eyes were dark, no longer the clear brightness they normally were. There was something wrong. Something broken. Something snapped.
"Wayzac, what happened?" Ben asked. It didn't matter that they were enemies. It didn't matter what history was between them, good or bad, though most was bad. This was more than the difference in opinion, feuds, rights and wrongs. This was a person who was obviously hurting and needed help. "Are you alright?"
"Stop pretending you care and tell me what I want to know!"
"Tell me what's wrong."
She couldn't stand the way he was looking at her. She couldn't stand the way he was speaking to her, like she meant something to him again. Like he was concerned. Like he would listen. And would he? He hadn't judged her with her deepest secrets, had never used them against her like she had against him.
"Where is it?" she hissed. "I am going to work it out of you. I promise you that I was being kind before. I won't be kind anymore."
"Lilly, please talk to me."
She wanted to yell at him, but the words were trapped in her throat as she stared at the bruised, bloodied and beaten man in front of her that for some reason had stayed strapped to this chair after every horrible thing she had ever done to him when he could have escaped with ease.
How dare he use that name? How dare he twist the knife deeper? How dare he give her hope that she wasn't truly alone in this?
She inhaled deeply, feeling the ache in her feet from the glass she hadn't bothered to remove, the blood warm and tacky under her. She couldn't remember having picked up the scissors in her hand, but the strain in her fingers brought her attention to how tightly she was clutching them with a sweaty palm and fingers.
"This is going to be the last time I ask nicely," she hissed through her teeth. "Where is the entrance to the Vergance Scatter?"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
In one trembling, shaky action, Wayzac brought the pair of shears over her head and brought them down as hard as she could.
Rey sat still in the hall beside the archives. Finn had explained that he had come out of the Nether in that hallway and so she figured it was the best place to start before they tried to travel all the way back to Ahch-To.
But the hours ticked by and she felt no closer to finding the supposed doorway that had previously existed here. Maybe she was too focused on keeping her breathing even. Maybe she was too busy pushing down the lump in her throat every time she swore she could feel Ben's pull in her chest. Maybe there really just wasn't anything here.
There was a sharp pain in her leg and her eyes shot open, a groan sounding out in the quiet hallway. Her hands went to her left thigh and the heels of her palms massaged the scalding heat that was there.
"Are you alright, Master Skywalker?"
Rey glanced up to see a floor length dress on a small frame and a familiar face. The smile she received was kind, though the voice stayed emotionless, more so than Cordella's ever did. "Emila, was it?"
"Yes, Master Skywalker."
"You can call me Rey," Rey said as she continued to knead into her thigh that was still burning.
"I would feel more comfortable if I used your title," Emila replied with a respectful bow of her head. "Are you feeling well?"
"Fine," Rey replied with a wince as a new jab of pain spiked just a little higher than the last one. "I'm alright."
"Do you need to see a doctor?"
"That's not necessary. Really."
"I'm sure the queen would disagree," Emila insisted, lowering herself to take one of Rey's hands. She pulled Rey to her feet and Rey's hand took the young girl's shoulder for balance. "Please allow me to help you to the infirmary." Her tone was firm and Rey figured it would be easier to indulge the girl than to try and fight her.
Emila's arm took Rey's waist as Rey took a wobbly step. "Thanks,' Rey whispered, teeth clenched at the pressure that she was applying on the leg every other slow step. "I'm surprised we haven't met before. I haven't seen you around the palace."
"I have been at my home for the last few months. My grandmother passed quite suddenly and as I am the last living direct relative I had a few affairs to put in order."
"I'm sorry for your loss," Rey muttered with a frown. "My grandfather recently passed as well, but I didn't know him much." Rey shook her head, unsure of where those words had come from. It was in no way a lie, but it left a bad taste in her mouth all the same.
"Thank you for your kind regards, Master Skywalker." Emila gave a bright smile as they turned the final corner in the maze of halls and came face to face with the medical bay's doors. "I shall be sure to inform the queen of your current condition."
Before Rey could argue, a nurse approached them. "Can I help you miss?" Her smile was just as kind as Emila's had been, her blond hair cut short.
"She has been experiencing some leg pains," Emila explained for Rey as she passed Rey off to the nurse. "I have some duties I need to attend to. I will check on you later, Master Skywalker. If you would excuse me." Emila bowed and hurried from the room, leaving Rey to now try to convince the medical staff not to make a large fuss.
"Odd girl," the nurse commented, supporting Rey to one of the many beds that lined the large, tall ceilinged room. "She doesn't usually talk that much."
Rey glanced over the nurse's shoulder to the shrinking handmaiden's figure. "She seemed nice."
"She is nice, just shy. I'm not sure why they picked her for the mistress's help. If you ask me, that girl is nowhere near strong enough to step in for the mistress." The nurse stepped back with her hands on her hips. Her apron was in bad need of an ironing, the colors complimenting her white dress prettily. Rey hadn't noticed it much before, but the woman looked like she was hastily put together, like she had grabbed things as she ran out the door. Rey smiled. It was endearing to see such a frazzled and tired looking woman be so nice and ready to help. "Now, what seems to be the problem? It had something to do with your leg, didn't it?"
"It's really not something to worry over. I think it was probably just a muscle cramp," Rey insisted, really not wanting to be fretted over.
"Well, you're already here. We might as well check it out. Better safe than sorry."
Rey rolled her eyes. There was no way she was getting out of it now. She reached for the cuff of her pants, pulling the stretchy fabric up her thigh and over where the pain was still present.
Two large red marks were sitting there. They had deep purple around them in a splotchy pattern. Rey could only stare. And she could feel the nurse's eyes sharp on her. "Did someone do this to you?"
"N-no," Rey stuttered out. "No one's touched me."
"I'm going to fetch a doctor. Can you wait here honey?" The woman took several hesitant steps backwards and quickly turned, leaving Rey alone.
Rey's hands gripped either side of her thigh as she looked over the markings. Maybe they weren't as bad as they looked. Maybe her having rubbed at them had made the splotches appear. That had to be it.
A mind blowing heat shredded though Rey's thigh and her fingers dug into her leg involuntarily. She gave a small cry and could only watch as a third marking joined the first two, the dark purple blossoming like a flower.
"Please stop!"
Rey bit at her lip as the pain spread. She couldn't catch her breath and her fingers felt like they were glued in place.
"Please!"
It took Rey a moment longer to realize that she hadn't been the one screaming those words despite the fact that her mind was saying the same thing. She looked up and stared at a panicked looking Ben who sat in the chair beside her bed.
New bruising adorned his face and his bare arms, muscles flexed against the short sleeves of his shirt. There were burns there as well. Fresh and bright red. Sweat covered his muscles and face as he breathed raggedly. He shook his head determinedly and Rey could only assume that maybe someone was speaking to him and she was pretty sure she knew who it was.
He jolted in the chair, head thrown back with a locked jaw. Rey's eyes blurred at another tear in her leg and could make out something shining a deep red in the same place on Ben's thigh.
"Ple-please stop!" he begged, voice broken. "Wayzac, please." There was a small pause and he whimpered, head lolling forward. "I'll tell you! I'll tell you!"
"Ben don't," Rey hissed through her teeth. "You can't tell her."
"A Jedi temple in the Unknown Regions." He winced, jumping back in the chair as if whatever was hurting him had threatened to be done again. "I don't know." And panic. "I don't know! I don't know anymore! It's just in the Unknown Regions. I don't know anything else! I swear!"
"Ben," Rey whispered.
"Miss, are you ok?"
Rey's head shot up to look at an older looking gentleman with thick spectacles on his nose. The blonde nurse from earlier was standing beside him with a concerned look on her face. Rey looked back to the chair and found it empty.
He had told. Wayzac had broken him. Rey had been hoping beyond hope that Ben could hold out until she could find him, but she needed to act now. They didn't have time to wait around anymore.
Without an answer, she jumped down from the bed, stumbling over, the pain brilliant as it washed over her. But she couldn't stop. She limped as quickly as she could out of reach of the nurse and the doctor, ignoring their calls for her to come back.
She found herself back at her suite in a blinding haze and pushed open the doors. She tumbled to her knees and panted, trying to catch her breath.
"Rey? Are you ok?" She couldn't place the voice, but she didn't care.
"He told them. She knows."
A/N: Thanks again to my sister and my wonderful beta, PitaGonzalezMe on twitter.