Chapter 30: An Awakening of Sorts

He could feel the change pass, and still they remained in the darkness. A darkness broken only by the stifled sobs of the Nurse. The Wall had been wrenched away the moment he grabbed it, and a sensation that built in the back of his neck exploded through him, and was gone. Still he was in the darkness, and he was grateful for the respite. He knew better than to relax, for any moment the Wall would make its presence known once more, and the pain it would inflict would be worse by far than he could imagine, having been thwarted in its grasp for control of Terraria.

"Guile?" the Nurse's voice whispered out, tentative, almost inaudible even in the silence of the darkness.

He was not certain what succor he could provide her, for he knew nothing of their future, but he responded nonetheless, "I am here."

There was something odd about the darkness. Something there that he could not define. It wasn't a presence; he could not feel the Wall...

"What just happened?" she asked, her voice no louder than before.

He could not answer her, could hardly process the question as he realized that he could not feel the Wall. Even when released, the Wall's presence had hovered at the edges of his awareness. Its power was too vast for it to be any other way. But here, in the darkness, and for the first time he could remember in an eternity of lives, he was not only free of its grasp, but free even from the sense of it... and he dared not consider the implications of this.

"Guile?" the Nurse repeated, a fraction louder and with a hint of alarm creeping in.

"I cannot answer that," he replied, "because I do not know."

He knew that this answer would do nothing to ease the fear she was beginning to exhibit, but he was too distracted by his own situation to consider the impact his words would have on her. And so, the silence stretched on.

"Uuuuuhhhh" a groan came from somewhere else in the darkness. It was the Builder. He had survived. A tension he had not known he was holding loosened, but only slightly.

"Where..."

"The silence between worlds," he answered the question he knew was coming, "and before you ask, I do not know how we came to be here."

The darkness took on a sharp feeling, and he could sense the Builder rapidly collecting himself somewhere nearby.

"Kathryn?" the Builder asked the darkness.

"What's going on?" she replied, the alarm still loud in her whispered response.

He knew the Builder still associated him with the Wall. He himself had drawn little distinction until moments ago. But this would not be something he could communicate in any meaningful way at the moment, and so he remained silent.

"I don't know," the Builder answered her, "I think..." he started, "I think I've been here before, but I can't..." he trailed off, remembering, Guile assumed, the time he had fallen. Perhaps he had fallen again, it would explain the Builder's presence at least.

The darkness hardened, "What are you going to do with us now?" the Builder asked.

"Nothing," Guile responded, adding in the event that his assumption was correct, "You have fallen before, you should know now how to awaken."

The Builder did not respond. Nor did he appear to leave.

"You pulled me out before," he finally answered, low and with a tinge of remembered fear.

Guile knew that it was the Wall he was referring to, but he still did not believe he could convince the Builder of that here in the darkness.

"Then move as if you are waking from sleep. Rise from the Darkness-" the Builder's presence was suddenly gone. Guile had not expected so quick a success, and he was left stunned for a moment before...

"Now what?" the Nurse asked, slightly louder than before.

"Now..." he had no time to consider his response before everything he knew ceased to be.

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He was standing in the light of the sun. Its warmth was pleasant on the absurd amount of skin his tattered garments exposed. He felt, refreshed. As if he'd just woken from a restful sleep. Considering the drastic change from the darkness moments before, he was surprised that he could see at all. And he remembered the Darkness. The last memory before that was a pleasant sensation at odds with the chaotic struggle to stay alive, followed by the weight of what seemed like an unreasonable amount of dirt, considering that he had been pressed into the corner of a structure by waves of nightmarish creatures at the time.

His memory before then was a mess. It seemed that every horror the night contained had gathered to tear him and- the Nurse!

"Kathy!" he shouted, unsure why he was so confident that this was her name.

A slap that knocked him from his feet seemed to come from the air itself. And in its wake the nurse was standing above him, a momentarily confused expression on her face, before her eyes found him and rage consumed her face.

"You," she spoke in unrestrained anger, "do NOT get to call me that." With those words, her anger dissolved as quickly as it had arrived and she fell sobbing to the ground beside him.

Confused, but not daring to interrupt her, he stood back up and moved a respectful distance away, staying close enough to guard her if something burst from behind the trees. He took in their surroundings for the first time. It was lightly wooded where they were, and the structure stood, not on a hill, but in a small clearing nearby. Much like it had what felt like a lifetime ago when... Guile... his mood darkened at the thought of the evil he'd experienced the night before.

Looking around, he was mildly surprised to see him lying nearby, face down in the grass. His first instinct was to press his sword into his tormentor's back, but he knew it to be a useless impulse, even though his sword was automatically in hand at the thought. Even after what he had experienced, in part because of what he had experienced, at Guile's hand, he could not bring himself to challenge his power. He knew he was nothing more than a plaything of the evil thing before him, and as he now had someone else's life to concern him, he could not throw his own away with a useless assault like that.

He looked back at the nurse. She had collected herself and was sitting with her arms around her knees, her expression vacant, as if she were somewhere else in her head. He didn't know how to proceed.

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It was dark. But not the darkness, just dark, as if my eyes were covered. I took a mental inventory of my extremities and finding them all present, I moved to clear the darkness from my eyes. It appeared I was lying down, outside, in the dirt. It had been quite some time since I had simply felt the dirt on my skin, breathed in the earthy scent, and so I continued to lie there for a while, listening to the sounds of a soft sobbing, and movement nearby. The air felt nice, and I... I felt... I...

Something was different.

Pushing myself to my feet, the sun was too bright and I had to squint, blocking it with my hand for a moment as my eyes adjusted. When did the sun get so bright? A gentle breeze sent a light shiver down my spine, and I almost fell over in shock. The world seemed to have come to life around me. It was as if my senses had begun working, only I hadn't noticed how muted they were before. What in the Cursed Guardians was happening here?

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I was tired beyond comprehension. The events of the night before had drained me in ways I could not articulate. And nothing since had rested me enough to change that. Sitting on the ground in a lightly wooded area I have never seen, staring at a structure that was supposed to be atop a small hill, I did not have the reserves to deal with this. And yet...

Holding my knees to my chest, I looked around again. Nothing had changed, save for Guile standing now. Had he been... it didn't matter. The man who was both my captor and a buffer between me and the nightmare I can not believe I experienced, let alone survived, was pacing a few steps away, and he appeared to be distracted by something he was considering.

I could probably slip away, though to where, in a place that apparently changed its terrain on occasion, I could not imagine. I was not only lost in an unknown place, but probably under the influence of some kind of neurological effect that affected me enough to cause hallucinations and confused my memories of simple things, like the location of my home... or... and this is what I meant. That little shack felt somehow connected to me, and that was clearly insane. I just wanted to lie back down and rest. I didn't even care that I was sitting in the dirt.

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He made up his mind. Turning to the nurse, he tentatively said, "Are you okay?"

She chirruped in a way that startled him, and laughed a hollow laugh that unnerved him, but in a mostly normal way before snapping, "Okay? Of course I'm okay. Why wouldn't I be?" before pushing herself to her feet and glaring at him with a poorly contained fury.

"I mean, Sure, I've been kidnapped for the Lord only knows what twisted reason by a half naked man and taken to a place where apparently dead people walk, my new husband among them, and dosed with some unknown hallucinogenic so that I see lights that glow and pulse as I imagine reaching for them while a towering pulsating column of mangled flesh threatens to Kill Me," she shot out in a single breath, "But you know, nothing to worry about. It's all Okay."

"I-" he tried to say.

"OF COURSE I'M NOT OKAY!" she shouted instead, "NONE OF THIS IS OKAY!" she added, gesturing around herself frantically.

He didn't know how to react. It's not like he didn't agree with her. Nothing about this place was okay, but she was the only other person who seemed to understand that, really, she was the only other person, since whatever Guile was certainly wasn't human, and Katherine's husband had been killed. He didn't know how to convince her that he was on her side. She was certain that he'd kidnapped her, and if what Guile had told him before was true, he almost had. Unintentionally.

"I..." he tried to start.

"Stop." she commanded, before taking a deep breath, "Just stop."

So he did.

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"It is time now to consider you next course of action," I informed the builder, seeing that his conversation with the Nurse was over.

He stiffened before slowly turning to face me, "You..."

"Saved us," the Nurse cut in, "That second light," she continued, wincing a little as she turned to face me, "That was you, wasn't it."

I was not sure what she was referring to, though I assumed it had something to do with her power, "I, do not know what you mean."

"Last night, when Johnathan," her face took on an agony I could almost feel, "when, whatever that was was trying to kill us... you were coming to fight it, weren't you?"

"I-"

"That thing was him!" the builder snapped over my words.

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He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Save them? Had Guile somehow gotten to her?

"He was behind everything that happened last night!" he shouted, turning to face Kathryn.

"I-" Guile attempted to speak again.

"No!" he shouted, cutting him off, "I don't know what kind of twisted lies you've manipulated her with, but I will not let you pretend you're not a monster after last night." He knew it was foolish to yell at Guile like this, but at this point, he'd seen how much power beyond inflicting pain that his tormentor wielded, and if he was going to die, he'd die making sure the nurse wasn't fooled by... whatever he was.

"He was not the monster," the nurse snapped at him, "I don't know how, but I could see the... the thing-"

"The Wall of Flesh," Guile supplied.

"The," she frowned as she continued, "Wall of Flesh," she seemed to be turning the name over in her mouth, "and I could see..." she gestured to Guile, "him."

"It was a trick," he tried to tell her, "He's been manipulating things here since I first woke up in this place."

"It's all a trick," she spat out, "but that doesn't change what I saw."

He didn't know how to respond to that. Clearly Guile had done something to fool her, and she hadn't seen what he'd seen, so he didn't know how to convince her.

"I don't know how," she continued, "but I could see a light coming out of you last night while you were fighting. And when the Flesh wall thing was getting ready to kill us, another light came to the fight, and it was him," she again gestured at Guile.

"That's impossible," he stated flatly, "I know you haven't been here long, but I've seen the horrible things he's done-"

"Like What?!" Guile snapped, surprising him. He'd seen a lot of reactions from the guide, creepy, sarcastic, evil, amused, but never, he realized, anger like this. He wasn't sure why, but it caught him off guard.

"What exactly have I done to you?" Guile continued, "Besides scare you and cause you temporary pain?"

"Temporary Pain!?" he shouted back, "Temporary Pain doesn't begin to cover," he gestured around wildly, "whatever it was you did to me!"

"Truly?" Guile continued angrily, "Show me the scars, show me the proof of this pain I've so grievously afflicted upon you!"

"I..." it was ridiculous that he was defending himself to this monster, "I don't have scars, I never have scars! Even when I was torn to shreds by zombies," he felt sick just remembering that, "I don't get scars!"

"And yet you continue to complain about things which no longer affect you!" Guile yelled back, "This has ever been your failing. You refuse to progress and spend all your time complaining about-"

He punched him. He knew he shouldn't have, knew that it was a waste of time, but it was too much. What he didn't expect, was to hit him. Even more surprising was when Guile hit him back.

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I was just so angry! The Builder was incompetent, but he could learn to overcome that. The Builder was a coward, but exposure would fix that. The Builder was weak, but his power would only grow. That the Builder was Stupid! There was no cure for that. And I hadn't lost EVERYONE I LOVED to listen to him whine about a little pain and his ever present cowardice!

Every point was punctuated with a blow laid upon the Builder, knocking him from his feet to the earth before I followed with a continued assault, every further hit a memory from my time before all that had occurred. Memories that felt fresh, as if they had only happened the day before, instead of many eons ago.

A sword came to the builder's hand and I immediately wrest it from him, driving through his chest into the earth below, ignoring the surprised screams of the nurse from nearby.

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I could not believe what just happened. It had happened so fast that I could not stop it, not that I was sure I should have. First the two men were fighting, and then a sword appeared out of nowhere before Guile used it to kill the Builder. One minute fighting, the next minute he was standing over the corpse, looking down and... crying?

I didn't know what to do. Should I run? Was I going to be next? Not allowing me time to make up my mind, he turned to me and said, "He will return. I will not," before turning to walk into the sparse forest. What does he mean he'll return? After watching him slowly disappear into the trees, I looked back to the body only, it was gone. In its place was a sword sticking up from the ground beside what looked like a headstone made of sticks and stone. Approaching it, I saw a message carved into the base, "You were impaled by Gaul."

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I continued to my home. A small cave the builder had dug out only days before. I made it to the center of the small room before collapsing to the floor. Perinque... Tam... what did I do.

The tears that had never found their way to surface were now pouring down my face. Tears for the friends I lost, tears even for the lives I had witnessed taken by the land over the eternity of my enslavement. Lives for which there were not enough tears in the world. Even sparing only a single tear for each life would leave me here for years. It was all Too Much.

I do not know how much time passed before sleep overcame me. It had been an eternity since last I slept, and if I never woke, that would be a blessing too large to ask of this cursed land.

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I watched him sleep from the shadows, my robe blending into the darkness and covering the bones that made up what remained of my physical form. It had worked. He was cursed in a way that he did not understand, but until the curse claimed him, he would have peace. What little peace a soul troubled by eons of enslavement could hope for at least. A small pink slime came through the earth beside me, having felt the change as I had.

"What now my friend?" I asked, my voice low enough to keep from waking Gaul.

She moved forward to touch our friend. We had all lost so much. All of us damned to the land, and no hope for redemption, our hope resting on the shoulders of a builder that seemed unfit for the burden. Perhaps this cycle would not end as we wished. Perhaps the builder we sought was still to come. So much had been put at stake here, and to consider it all lost. I could not allow myself to consider that too deeply.

Pinky returned to my side, pausing a moment to reach out to me, before leaving once more through the earth. She was right. There was nothing to do but wait. Even now the whispers were growing louder. The Change had provided a brief repose, but such things were always fleeting. She could no longer speak, but I could see that she struggled with corruption as much as I. Though she had her family to keep her, where I was alone. Able only to act in brief moments of lucidity. I pulled at the fabric of the world, and moved through to caverns below, where my madness would be less likely to harm the living above.

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He was surrounded by darkness. Guile had surprised him by first allowing him to hit him, but then moreso when instead of doing whatever it was he was so fond of doing, he punched him back. He had been so surprised by the assault that he did nothing to defend himself until after he was knocked off his feet. At that point he pulled his sword to his hand, which Guile took advantage of by using it to stab him through the heart.

He just floated there in the nothingness for a few moments, not sure what he should do next. It shocked him actually, how calm he was about the whole thing. There was no doubt that he had died this time. He could still feel the memory of the sword parting his chest. Only, it was just that, a memory. While he could not see himself, he felt fine.

He tried looking around, but it became immediately obvious that this was pointless. He'd just recently been in this darkness, only he'd heard Guile and Kathryn talking then, and he pulled himself out of it by-

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He was standing once more in the light of day. Looking around, he tried to find Guile, and was relieved not to see him nearby. Not that he knew what he would have done had he found him. Something had changed in his guide, and he didn't understand it enough to do anything with that information. Somehow he seemed less, terrifying. Though that had not stopped him from stabbing a sword through his heart. He winced at the memory of moments ago, but it was not with the kind of fear that normally accompanied such things. Had he changed as well?

He noticed a small cross nearby with a sword plunged into the earth beside it. Without approaching, he knew that it was where he had died... though could you really call it dying if he was unharmed by the experience? He decided to walk over to it, and saw something scrawled across the bottom, "You have been impaled by Gaul." Gaul?

An unease still stirred at reading those words. He felt as if he was just kind of skirting the fear that should have consumed him, but perhaps if he could keep it at a distance... he pulled the wooden sword from the ground to his hand and turned away from the tombstone. He looked around and found the structure that had been under assault the night before. Kathryn was sitting against the wall, with her knees pulled to her chest and her head down.

As he approached, she looked up with fear, a fear that widened into shock as she quickly stood up and held her hands out as if to ward him off. "You were just..."

"Dead. Yeah, I know." he muttered, stopping his approach.

She stood there staring uncertainly at him, "So this is just another thing that happens here?" A flash of something took over, "Then why didn't it work for Johnathan?"

"I..." he didn't know what to say, "I don't know. He..." he thought back to when the well dressed gentleman, when Johnathan, was still alive, "he never healed from his injuries either."

"Of course he didn't," she replied before closing her eyes and taking a deep breath.

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I knew I was wasting my time. Nothing here made any sense. Being here didn't make any sense. Last night didn't make sense. And this apparently immortal being didn't seem to want to kill me. I needed to make due for the time being so that I could have time to find my way back home. No amount of distress was going to make that easier, nor bring Johnathan back, and as petty a concern as it seemed in the grand scale of things, I was hungry.

"I'm hungry," I said, changing the subject.

He seemed caught off guard by the sudden shift in conversation. Good, let him be off guard.

"I..." a mushroom appeared in his hand, "I've got this."

It wasn't like the mushrooms you got at the store. It was too colorful. Too plump. But now was not the time to be worried about such things. Nor did it make sense to spend the energy worrying about how it just appeared out of nowhere. If he wanted me dead, he wouldn't have saved me last night. It was very unlikely to be poisonous. So I snatched it and took a bite.

Just like everything else in this place, eating the mushroom wasn't an experience I could have expected. In a single bite, the entire thing dissolved, and I could feel the mass of it in my mouth as I chewed the surprisingly supple plant. Upon swallowing, I could feel it sliding down my throat at its own pace, causing me to cough in surprise, though it hadn't actually choked me.

And just like that I was no longer hungry. That was convenient.

It was time now to move forward, I needed to keep my momentum going, "What are you planning to do with me now?" I asked.

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She still thought he had some kind of malicious intent for her. Even less than that, he didn't even have any idea what he wanted for himself, let alone what to do regarding her. He had no interest in trying to deal with whatever was going on with Guile Gaul?, and he hadn't really considered how or why he was able to survive being stabbed in the chest. What he did know though was-

"I can finish furnishing your home-" she snapped out a laugh in response to that.

"Oh good," she replied, "I was just lamenting the lack of curtains on the holes in the walls."

"I'm just as lost as you are," he snapped back, "You keep accusing me of having some kind of ulterior motive, but I woke up here with no idea who I was several days ago."

She frowned at that, "Why should I believe you?"

"I don't care what you believe," he replied, "the fact is, I don't know what I'm doing here either and the best I've come up with so far is to at least make this stupid place as comfortable as I can while I'm stuck here!"

She seemed unfazed by his outburst before closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. That seemed to be how she collected herself, so he stood by and waited for her to respond.

"Fine." she said finally, "Build me some curtains."

He smirked, for the first time that he could remember doing so since he'd awoken in this strange world.

"What is your name anyway?" Katherine asked him, and it took him a few moments as he realized that Guile had never bothered to ask.

"It's-"

"Kristian the Merchant has arrived!" an unknown voice cut in.