"You look defeated," I said to my uncle.

A smile graced his lips but did not reach his eyes, and he let out a small chuckle. "Defeated," he said, "that's a good word for it."

"This past week has been really difficult for you, I can imagine. As a doctor and a father, to see so many sick and helpless, and not know what to do."

"The worst of it was those three days when they would not tell me if you were all right," he said. "We almost broke the treaty, and if I could have calculated how to not have lives be lost, we would have."

"You eventually did. Just in a human, non-aggressive way, but you stormed the castle for an update on me."

"Yes, that was Edward's idea. He said that the werewolves had come and checked on Bella in a non-aggressive human form before, and perhaps Sam would be compassionate."

"Are you happy with the outcome?"

"I suppose it went as well as it could. If you were not awake, there could have been a fight. I got to see my niece and do my own exam on her, and you got to come home. I guess it was successful."

"Do the wolves bother you much?"

"They are unpredictable. Alice can not see them. With Bella's decision hanging in the balance, I can't tell if they are friend or foe, and that worries me."

"What is your opinion on Bella's decision?"

He wrung his hands together. "I detest the idea of making another vampire. It will put her through so much pain and torture. Just look at Jasper. What happened yesterday, to see him like that, broke my heart. And to think, we are going to put lovely Bella through that. The fact that she wants it means she clearly isn't well or knows what she is doing. But Edward insists on dying with her, that means I have sixty years, at best, with my son. That's a blink of an eye. I can't lose him."

"He was the first one you found right? You adopted him before you married Esme."

"Yes," he said. "I met Esme before Edward, but I changed Edward first then a couple years later, changed and married Esme."

"So when Edward says, 'Im gonna die with Bella,' or when he went to the Vultouri to kill himself, how did that make you feel?"

"I was very disappointed."

"I'd be pissed at both of them."

Carlisle laughed.

"So when Bella gives a deadline to make her a vampire, and stop taking medicine because it makes her want to be human, and Edward runs to the Volturi to die because Bella is dead, and then the werewolves say if you bite her it means war, how does that make you feel?"

"Trapped."

"Yeah. Trapped. Cause if you do something to please Bella or make Edward not want to kill himself, the werewolves are gonna attack."

"So how do I keep everyone alive?"

"Well, the first thing we got to achieve is keeping you alive and well. 'Cause if i have learned anything this past week, everything is going to fall apart if you aren't taking care of yourself. So what are some things that we can do to take care of you?"

He took a deep breath and put a hand on his chin thinking, "Maybe Esme and I could go to Isle Esme this fall, just the two of us. It's such a lovely place that time of year and it would be nice to get away."

"Okay, plan a romantic trip. Wonderful."

"Also, it would be nice to do some hiking and hunting as a family, just the seven of us again. I know Edward wants to be with Bella, but she would be fine with the wolves for a day, and I think maybe if we got some comradery back. Everyone is so divided about Bella turning, and I think if we all just went and put it out of our minds for a second, that would be nice."

"When is your next day off from the hospital?"

"I have Saturday off."

"I can get Bella to La Push. I am sure Jacob is dying to see her. It would be good to be around the werewolves. If we can just get her and Edward separated, you can have your family day."

"Edward would kill you."

"I'll call it group therapy, vampires only. And I can be in La Push to watch Bella."

Smiling, he said, "Just a day with the family." He sighed. "That would be nice."

"I want to talk to you about something, and I hope you understand that I am being a clinician."

"Of course."

"There has been a lot of thoughts of suicide, self-harm, self-loathing going around. I know you used to struggle with that, any feelings coming back up? Any concerns?"

"You're worried I'm gonna go to the Volturi."

"Well, someone has to stay here and pay for everything."

Carlisle laughed.

"Alright, seeing Jasper get so bad last night, and I almost had to physically hold him down to stop him, yes, some self-loathing and thoughts of just failure and I can not be who everyone needs me to be and I should just kill myself now."

"But you shouldn't. I am going to say the same thing to you that I said to Jasper. Why was last night considered a failure? No humans were hurt, the secret was kept, and the treaty was upheld. Do we need to address that Jasper eats when he is upset, yes, but he didn't fail, and you didn't either. Being the dad does not mean you stop everything from being wrong, it means you are always there, you never leave, and you will pick us up and help us. Jasper didn't know what was happening last night, but he saw you, and he knew that you were going to let it get out of control and that is what a dad is."

Carlisle sighed. "I guess that makes it worth it."