Heroes of Magic and Might
Chapter 26 – Here's what we're going to do
…
Time flies when you are having fun, or so the conventional wisdom says. But what about when you're not having fun, like when you're bored, or depressed, or panicked. Funny how conventional wisdom doesn't have much to say on that.
It was now a week since his arrival, and to many a shock, no one had died.
Not since crash landing in another world had the residents of Hogwarts been in such a tizzy. For many this change of leadership had been only a minor shift from their default state. Some had adapted quickly to the new paradigm, others were still in the process, while some were refusing to even try.
Minerva McGonagall had not been given a choice. She stood behind Co, to the right, as the prefects filed in. On his left, Dolores Umbridge wore a secret little smile the once transfiguration professor desperately wanted to claw off her face.
Much as she hated to admit it, out of everyone in the castle Umbridge had adapted the quickest. She'd spent all week popping up at every opportunity to ingratiate herself with their new ruler. It had been funny at first, watching the bigoted woman try her level best not to let slip something blatantly offensive.
She'd been sure the blue man had seen right through the unctuous troll, till she walked into the antechamber off the great hall and found her standing there looking impossibly smug. It had required all her years of dealing with the various outrages conjured by naughty students to hold her tongue. She'd very nearly bit it.
"So glad you could all find time to join me today," the master of Hogwarts started. "I trust you all know why you are here."
It would be quite an accomplishment if they did since he'd never given a reason in his summons.
"I suspect it has something to do with our positions at Hogwarts," said Anna DeWinter.
"Very good miss…"
"DeWinter. Anna DeWinter."
"DeWinter—how oddly appropriate. Pray, what is your position, Miss DeWinter?"
"I am one of the seventh-year prefects of Slytherin house. This was to be my last year at Hogwarts."
"Oh, really. And how was that going for you?"
"Not as well as I could have hoped," she said. "I had expected to be Head girl. Sadly, the position went to someone more, unobtrusive."
A simple enough word, unobtrusive, in the right context and proper tone becomes a truly stinging insult. She didn't bother to name the one it was aimed at, that would have been tasteless, and anyway she had no need to. She identified herself with her trembling cower and humiliated blush.
The seventh year Hufflepuff looked ready to cry. Co did not appear to notice, the girl sitting directly to his left.
"Probably for the best anyway. All of you are about to very unobtrusive. While I'm sure Minerva would thank you for your service, I must now inform you it will no longer be required. Your positions, in fact the entire system upon which they were predicated, is hereby dissolved."
"What!"
"You can't!"
And other outraged exclamations were made, and allowed to be made, till he grew bored of them, "Thank you all for your time. You are dismissed."
Several chairs were knocked over in the process of leaving, others squeaking in less forceful protest. One however remained unmoving.
"Was there something you needed Ms. DeWinter?"
"I was just wondering, with regards to the duties performed by the 'former' prefects. Concerns to security and such. Who will be performing these now if I may ask?"
"You may in fact," he said genially. "From what I have observed there has been too much unnecessary overlap in several areas and a gross mismanagement of resources, in particular with regards to manpower. I have instructed Dolores to disband the defense force she was leading to free its members up for more useful tasks. My men are in more than sufficient quantity to perform such basic duties, in fact, I have been informed by one Pomona Sprout that several of them are in desperate need of such duty to prevent them from, and I quote 'loafing about'."
The Slytherin girl gave a small grin, "Is that so? Professor Sprout?"
"Indeed. Matronly woman. Good organizer. We've already had a long discussion on the future of her farming efforts. An army marches on its stomach is it not said."
"That's how you know it's made of men."
Minerva blanched at such a blatant remark, but Co only laughed, "A remarkable insight Miss DeWinter. Will there be anything else?"
"No sir."
"Then I bid you, good day," he said with a slight bow.
She returned a polite curtsy then retreated from the room.
"Hm, charming girl."
"You think so," said Minerva, fighting to bring her heartbeat back down to normal.
"And a leader if I'm not mistaken. She has that kind of aura."
"A fine example of Slytherin house," said Umbridge, making McGonagall grind her teeth.
"Hm. Well, anyway. I'll see the two of you back her after lunch," he said and strode from the room.
After lunch they had another meeting, this one with the various project groups they'd come across in their weeklong survey. After word got around about this meeting, well, Fred and George were to be involved. That worried her on the best of days.
"Nice isn't it, to have a proper leader in charge," said Umbridge offhandedly.
"Excuse me!"
The toad smiled, a smug punchable expression, "He was never really suited to it you know. Should have retired years ago."
She didn't say the name but there was really no need to. Dumbledore, of course it was Dumbledore. "And I suppose you think you would have done better."
She was being baited; it was childishly obvious. So why was she allowing herself to rise to it?
The toad like woman gave her a look she probably intended to be intimidating, "If I had been in charge, I can assure you, things would not have deteriorated the way they did."
McGonagall bit back a snarl as the stout woman in the ugly pink cardigan trotted from the room like she was holding something between her ass cheeks. She wouldn't say it out loud, but she swore then and there, if the opportunity arose, she was going to kill the little toad.
… Cut, cut, chop
"Left, right, thrust, again. Left, right, thrust, good!"
He was forced to take the small man's word on that. It didn't feel good. His hands were raw, his shoulders were screaming, and his back ached like an arthritic centenarian. Who knew learning to use a sword would be so much work?
Well, anyone who's ever used a sword, naturally.
"Did I tell you to stop!"
When he'd asked Bill to teach him, he hadn't expected the little man to turn into the drill instructor from hell. He also hadn't expected his minions to quickly start imitating him, thus dragging them into the training as well. That he didn't mind so much.
They'd been looking to him for leadership ever since he killed their last leader, even given him the clothes and armor their leader had worn as a sort of symbolic gesture. The breastplate didn't fit, but the vest he'd worn under it did.
He was wearing it too, being without a shirt like he was. Though that's not to say he hadn't cleaned it ten or twenty times first. Gabby had seemed disappointed by that, which confused him. But then, a lot of things about Gabby confused him.
"Guard up! No slacking!"
Why guard, the dummy wasn't going to attack him.
His training log was looking well chunked, and if he hadn't been feeling similarly, he might have found some sense of satisfaction at his achievement. It was in there somewhere, probably, hiding under the woodchips.
"Alright, that's good. Break time!"
Harry happily collapsed to the ground.
The chuckling Elwin plopped down next to him and pulled out his pipe, "I see we are absorbing the lesson adequately."
He left room for a clever response, scathing remark, or grunt of acknowledgement. Harry hadn't the energy for any of those and just groaned weakly, making the Elwin chuckle through his pipe.
"Wouldn't have expected you'd be the first to fall."
Fires of outrage sparked briefly, sending a small jolt to the battery, "If I were using magic I wouldn't be," he would have known was a weak defense if there'd been enough energy to power a thought process rather than just the mouth.
"Not familiar with that sort a magic," said Bill, pausing to take a long puff. "Course, I've only known a couple wizards. Never been one myself."
"M'not surprised," he slurred, realizing he was going to have a conversation whether he wanted to or not. "It's something I learned from a book, just a couple months ago. They didn't teach this magic at Hogwarts."
"Ah, yes, your wizard school."
Stories of Hogwarts and his time in it had filled the late evenings for the past week, too tired to do things but not tired enough to sleep. The goblins seemed especially impressed by his various exploits. He really couldn't figure out why.
"So, why didn't you use it?"
"It's called enhancement magic," Harry explained. "It can't make me a swordsman. It might make me swing harder but that's not going to make me any better any faster."
"That is true," the small man agreed. "Funny you caught that. Most people wouldn't."
"Don't think so?"
The Elwin laughed, "Do you really doubt?"
Harry thought about it, "No." He could see a Ron or Seamus or Dean just going at it with all their strength and no idea what they were doing but a sense of certainty they could find a way to muscle through.
"Technique," said Bill, "will always overcome brute force. I never had much brute force to begin with. Even the dwarves who taught me were stronger than I was, if not much bigger."
"So that's not just your bias talking Bill?"
The Elwin grinned through his pipe, "Maybe a little."
Harry laughed; he liked the small man. He had an easygoing nature that wormed its way into your good graces without you even noticing.
"It's been a long journey for me, ever since that day I walked out my front door," he said, adopting a distant look, like he was somewhere far away, far in time and far in space. "I've seen so many things. Fought more than a few of them. It's been quite the adventure, oh yes it has."
"Did you ever want to go back?" A thing he'd wondered himself several times since walking out the front door.
"I did once," said Bill. "It wasn't the same, even though everything was the same. It was all still there, every bit in its proper place, just like I left it. But it felt different. I was different." This brought him back to the present and he tapped out his pipe on his heel. "Of course, then I fell through that portal and wound up here and it became something of a moot point."
"Mm. Hate it when that happens."
"That ya do," he agreed. "Hate it when they refuse to fall down too," he gestured at Harry's wood chunked training pole, still standing defiant.
"Just don't know when to quit," Harry groused. "Bah! I'll get him next time."
"Probably want to have Gabby look that over now that you've dulled it on there."
The sword, one of the half goblins own creations, was a fairly simple short sword, which made it almost half again as long as Bills custom 'short' sword. Simple though it was, he thought it was nice, and rather sweet of her to give it to him.
"Do they really dull that quickly?"
"Depends how you use'em. They weren't made to be choppers."
And that's all he'd been using it for. "Might as well finish this guy then."
Hauling himself upright, he approached his decimated pole, let the enhancement flow over him, then, in a single stroke, cleaved it in two.
"Not bad."
Not good either, "I felt that," said Harry, looking worriedly at his sword.
"Well, you may have been stronger, but it wasn't."
And he immediately felt stupid for such an obvious lapse, "I could make it stronger, duh! I need to try that again."
They'd set up numerous poles for their training and he selected one that had yet been used. Taking a moment to feel out the blade and apply the enhancement before throwing the cleaving stroke.
"What! Hey!"
It didn't go quite as planned and Bill fell over laughing as he fought to unwedge his weapon.
"See, this is what I meant about technique over force," the Elwin chortled. "Also, about dulling the blade. Don't spose you've got a spell for that."
He didn't, but as he was sort of stuck, he took a moment to consider something else. If the enhancement could strengthen the blade overall, was there a way to hone the edge? Blocking out the chortling mirth behind him, he let his aura slide over the weapon for a more in-depth scan, the precursor to enhancement.
Bill was finally giggled out, when the blade shifted, then slipped through the wood like a scissor through paper.
"Oh!"
He tested his new edge on two more training poles, finding them able to give no more resistance than the first. "Interesting. I never thought to try that before."
"I guess we're all lucky you're such a dumdum or we'd be in trouble."
Harry laughed at the dispersion cast on his intelligence, but before he could continue the verbal sparring, one of his new minions came bounding out of the woods on the back of a wolf heading straight for him.
"Boss! BOSS!"
"I hate when they call me that," Harry grumbled.
"You wouldn't let them call you grand supreme master," Bill reminded.
"Boss it is. Wonder what he's all worked up about?"
"Maybe he found you someone else to conquer."
Harry glared down at the smirking little man, "Not funny Bill. Not funny."
… The Fred and George Weasley Midnight Variety Show
"And I believe that covers everything."
"Questions, comments, poorly considered threats?"
The whole room stared; some mouths hung open. Those less used to Fred and George were still trying to decipher what they'd just been told; they weren't getting far.
"I must say you two have been very busy," said Co who appeared to have followed the entire thing. "I trust you shall continue in this vein."
"Of course," the twins said in unison.
"I may have a project or two in mind as well at some point."
"We live to serve," the proclaimed dramatically.
"A little over the top, don't you think," said Hermione as the small group ambled back to the library.
"We like to keep them guessing," said Fred.
"Was all that you told him true? I mean, are you really working on, well… THAT!"
"You'll have to be more specific," said George.
"We're working on a lot of things," added Fred.
"Not even half of which we told our new overlord," finished George.
"You know that's dangerous," she scolded. "If he finds out…"
"He'll chop off our heads?"
"He might."
"Lucky for me I've got a spare," said Fred.
"I'm just holding it for him," said George.
"I'm being serious," she exclaimed quietly. If she'd learned nothing else at Hogwarts, there was a time and place to raise your voice. Anywhere your new overlord or his people might hear you was not it.
"We have taken the risks into consideration."
"Fret not. We have matters well in hand."
"I'm sure that's what Dumbledore thought too."
It was a low blow, but she was in no mood to play nice and she returned their looks with one of her own.
"That was not nice."
"Not nice at all."
"Well maybe if you'd listen," she snapped. "It may surprise you to know that I value your lives and do not wish to see them ended because you decided to get cocky."
The twins shared a look, the look was returned. Hermione Granger beamed from the cheeks when she became the meat in a ginger sandwich.
"We do appreciate it."
"You old mother hen."
"Oh, honestly."
The twins chuckled but it wasn't mean. She found herself chuckling as well.
"I mean it you know. Don't go doing anything stupid."
"Us?"
"Never."
"I mean it. This is not a game."
"On the contrary."
"Our dear Hermione."
"Life is a game."
"And we play to win."
"And cheat whenever possible," she added.
"That too."
"It's like she knows us."
… I'm sorry, say that again
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down. I can't keep up. Did you just say you saw a group of 'lizard' men?"
The goblin nodded emphatically, "Whole bunches. They had lots of meat they was carrying. They is coming this way."
It seemed simple enough when spoken at regular speed, but he was still stuck on lizard men.
"They're not uncommon," said Rosebud, seeing his quandary. "Usually swamp dwellers. Probably a hunting party of some kind."
"Are there any swamps around here?"
"Not on this side of the ridge," Gabby said. "I've never been to the other side."
"They don't have to live in swamps, I was just saying they usually do," said Rosebud. "Anyway, they haven't done anything to us. I say we just let them pass."
"I agree," said Gabby. "No sense starting a fight with people we don't even know."
The goblin looked at the two women, the small man, then to his commander, "Boss?"
Harry thought. He thought hard because the subject would not settle for anything less. He was many things, had many feelings on these 'lizard' men. Curiosity for one. Just what the heck was a lizard man?
At the same time, he understood what Rosebud and Gabby meant. There was no reason to go fighting people they didn't need to fight. These weren't the Ashe. He had no grudge. But what about them. Why were they here? What was their purpose.
"The girls are right," he said at last. "There's no reason to go looking for a fight."
"Uh oh, he's agreeing with us," said Rosebud. "Here comes the but."
"But! that doesn't mean they aren't. We just don't know. So, I think a little reconnaissance is in order. Any objections?"