A/N: An authors not at the beggining of the chapter? Blasphemy! But I have to suggest you guys listen to a song (Hate me, by lil peep,) when you see this paragraph break. (xxx). It's up to you but that song is what gave me inspiration and I think it goes great with the scene. Without further delay, enjoy.
Chapter 27: Beautiful Beginnings
-5:00 am-
The sudden glow of a bright screen amidst the darkness, accompanied by a high pitched ringing sound, was enough to pull a sleep deprived boy out of his dreams and into the present world. And after the chain of worry filled nights, where sleep all but eluded him, an emotional breakdown was almost guaranteed to strike. The tech savvy brunnet –used to facing challenges head on everyday without fear – now found himself riddled with fear of what the future held for his beloved pups, shame for his lack of both supervision and availability in their ever changing lives, and a guilty concious that reminded him that this was all somehow his fault. All of these ingredients made for one hell of a sleepless night. More than aggravated by the intrusion to his dreams and the lack of sleep he was anything but excjted to answer the call, and even less excited to wake up.
Grumbling taboo cursewords under his breath, that he tried to keep to a minimum for the pups' sake, Ryder willed his eyes open, miraculously. Sleep was still heavy in them and his body as he struggled to find and reach the buzzing device, his hand aimlessly roaming around the dark searching for his bedside table cradling his pup pad. After a few more seconds, Ryder felt the corner of the tablet. Bringing the screen to his face, he tried to make out the caller ID, but found it difficult to look directly at the LED screen without feeling his eyes automatically close.
Once he was able to see who was on the other line however, he shot up out of bed and turned his desk lamp on in one swift motion, all before accepting the call.
"Yes? hello, Ryder speaking." He rattled off in the midst of his excitement.
"Hi Ryder, this is nurse Cody, we met briefly when your pups were admitted. I wanted to inform you that Chase, rather, him and Rocky are both awake and responsive. And furthermore Chase is requesting you.." the pup tried but was cut off.
"I'll be right there, thank you for calling." Ryder said while in the process of getting dressed.
"Right, see you soon then." Cody smiled before ending the call.
Now fully dressed, trembling in place as his nerves skyrocketed, Ryder extended his pup pad, pressing the center button, momentarily watching as the circular rainbow of colors lit up, before practically shouting.
"Paw Patrol, to the Paw Patroler!"
A single pair of snow white paws tapped along the laminent floor, skittering past the medical workers and spectators in her wake. On a mission, with one target in her scope. One pup that never left her mind, one pup she was determined to find, just one pup, running circles around her heart.
Just as her body did, her mind raced at dangerous speeds, completly oblivious to Marshall's voice still speaking to her through her alit pup tag.
"Everest?"
"Did you hear me?"
"Hellooo? I said, Ryder and the rest of us are on our way to see Chase, he's awake."
She was to busy to listen, fighting off the millions of thoughts and fears tugging at her attention, all centered around Chase, the pup she feared to God to be loosing.
Faster she fled, running away from both angered nurses, one lonely doctor caught in the crossfire, and the swarming number of possibilities now figuratively drowning the hope of a future with the police pup treading water in her heart. On autopilot as she ruminated on the last conversation they shared, rather the argument, that is. looking into his eyes, so empty, so hurt, so, broken. All this time she wanted to help heal the cracks of his heart, but instead she left it in pieces. Why? That is what she drove herself to not only find out, but to set the record straight.
' 22, 23, come one! 26..'
Counting as she ran, the husky snapped her eyes from room number to room number, hunting for her Sheperd's room.
'Aha, 28.'
Upon finding the right room she skidded to a hault. Her heart was beating out of her chest as she inched closer to the door. Each step she took brought her closer to an unavoidable and very uncertain future. Every nerve in her body was desperarly pulling her away from the door, yet once she thought of the happiness this leap of faith could bring, her heart pushed her forward into the dimly lit room.
laying on his back on an inclined position, his lower half covered underneath neatly tucked blankets, Chase watched the flashing T.V hanging from the wall facing him, the lights dancing off of his half open eyes, sleep urging for the Shepered to join it. Enticing him with a warm virus slowly but steadily spreading throughout his body, beginning to fill his head, gently coaxing his mind into a dreamfilled submission. He was close too, feeling his mind helplessly fail to escape the choke hold, until the sudden whine of a door opening brought him back to the land of the living. His tail already beginning to wag in anticipation of his visitor.
"Ryder?" He said in a hushed but excited voice. His ears erect for only a moment, falling to his head once his eyes landed on the silent pup in the room, starring up to him with a flurry of emotions storming in her eyes.
Everest took a small step toward the side of the bed, keeping distance between them. It hurt her seeing the state he was in, wrapped up in bandages, tubes and wires littering his pristine fluffy fur. And that disappointed look on the Sheperd's face only made the pain worse. But there was no going back now.
"What is it, Everest?" The pup said with a sigh, his once wagging tail slowing to a stop.
Everest took another step closer before she answered him. "I came to see you, I..wanted to see if you were alright, do you need anything?"
Once the words left her mouth, the police pup noticeably stiffened. She could see the conflict in his face as he struggled to give a response. Her eyes immediately locked with his when he finally found the words to say.
"I need you to be honest with me."
There were so many things that Everest had kept hidden, her intentions, her feelings, her past, which one Chase was referring to she had no idea, and part of her didn't want to know, but every fiber of her heart begged to differ, no matter what happened she would hear the Shepered out, and tell him the truth, he deserved that much, and so much more. "About what, Chase?"
"Why didn't you tell me?" His tone was as icy as his eyes, while his bleeding wounds and aching heart, pain which she had caused, remained concealed deeper beneath his frigid mask. "That you loved Rocky?"
Everest froze upon hearing the mixed breed's name, cringing at the obvious hurt lining the police pup's voice. Sitting infront of his bed, still as a statue, she pondered how to answer such an impossible question. She could barely look at him, how could she ever hope to tell him that she didn't love Rocky, regardless of her contradicting actions toward him. How could she make Chase understand that none of it was genuine love. How could she tell him the hideous truth of the matter.
Her feelings toward Rocky were twisted, her justifications for her actions were hollow and flawed , her treatment towards him was borderline criminal. The love she thought she felt, was nothing more than an escape, a fantasy dreamed up by her brain to cope with her demons and the pain they filled her with. And Rocky, poor Rocky was so carring, so eager to help, it was just in his heart to be that way. He never suspected a thing, nor did he notice the damage he was sustaining during the process.
Day and night she brought the mixed breed into her mind's warzone, and sat on the side lines while Rocky faced her demons. Never once offering to do the same for him. He was her escape, always there to lean on, to vent to, to make everything ok. The more he gave to her, the more she took away.
Nothing would have changed had it not been for her own self serving needs and her attempt to mate with him. She wanted to claim Rocky as her own, because as time went on, she realized she couldn't fight her demons without him, she couldn't survive on her own. And only after she had nearly violated him, was she able to see just how much she was destroying the mix. And how disgusting and selfish her actions truley were.
Nothing would ever be enough to make up for her behavior, though she would try like hell to patch things up with Rocky. And she would be damned if she ever put anyone through that agian. No, she would never make that mistake again, especially with Chase.
Chase was different, he deserved every part of her and more. He deserved to be cherished, protected, and treated like a king. A beautiful thing had happened when they had came together, the more of herself that she gave to him, the better she felt, and to have that reciprocated. back to her, for Chase to give her something back, well, it was unlike anything she had ever felt before.
xxx xxx xxx
Everest blinked her eyes, glancing up from the floor to a patiently waiting Chase who looked ready to burst, silently watching her with glassy eyes. She tried, tried so hard to say something, anything to fix this mess she had created. Reveal to him her own demons, and what they drove her to do. But everytime she opened her mouth, her words caught in her throat seeing the hurt bleeding through the Sheperd's face, as his mask crumbled by the second. Her silence only further playing with Chase's emotions until he couldn't take it anymore. Everest expected him to explode at her, to scream and shout until he lost his voice, she deserved it, and braced herself for the storm to come. Yet when she only heard silence interrupted by small distressing whines, and seeing the first tear roll down his muzzle as he tried to speak, she heard her heart break in two.
Chase spoke in a quivering voice, all of the authority and confidence gone, but he still tried. " What do you want with me, Everest? Why, why are you so hell bent on helping me? You saw me, how vulnerable I was, how damaged I am now. And yet you were so kind, so caring for me as I broke infront of you. You weren't scared of me, you didn't run, you stayed by my side. I.. you.."
Taking in a shaky breath, he steeled himself for what was to come, and the vulnerable position he would be putting himself in. He had to atleast tell her, make her understand.
"You..you make me feel safe, I'm not as... scared when... I'm with you. You make me feel brave, make me feel like I can recover, you make me believe in myself. I've never felt this way about anyone...because nobody has ever treated me like you have." He said looking away from her and down to his bedsheets.
Chase felt his voice crack as he tried to continued, the tears that had formed in his eyes now freely falling down his cheeks. " And I just thought..I thought we could help eachother...I thought what we had was something special...I thought... you wanted me too.." Whispered Chase, looking only momentarily at Everest before he brought his attention back to his sheets, now dotted from his dripping muzzle. Breathing out the last part.
" I thought.. I could love again."
Letting out a whine, he quickly brought both of his paws up to his face trying to hide the wave of tears that were overtaking him, his ears burning like fire as the uncomfortable silence filled the room once more.
For the second time that night, the echo of her own heart shattering rang in the huskie's ears. She never wanted to see Chase like this again in her life, it hurt too much. She did notice something begin to stir inside of her, through the wreckage in her chest, a glimmer of hope caught fire and began to spread. As if the lord himself had hand picked and wrapped this beautiful, amazing, strong Shepered up in a bow just for her. Everything she needed, everything she wanted, was right infront of her.
There was no doubt anymore, No reason to hold back the pent up feelings the snow pup kept bottled up inside. This was her moment, her chance to show that stubborn Shepered just how wrong he was.
A painfully happy whine escaped her muzzle, as she moved with a new found confidence, she jumped up to his bed, padding over to the sobbing pup and gently, taking her own paw, pushed Chase's paws down, revealing his wet face.
Holding his paws in her own. She found her voice. She wasn't scared to tell him anymore, if they were meant to be, than it wouldn't change anything. "I..I never loved him Chase, what we had, or what I thought we had, it wasn't real. It was toxic. I used him, I was blinded by my own desperate motives to feel better..I never thought to ask him how he felt, I was too close, I could'nt see how badly I was hurting him, until it was too late. And there won't be a day that goes by that I don't feel disgusted with myself for my behavior...but."
Chase managed to get his sobbing under control and was overwhelmed by a flurry of butterflies fluttering in his stomatch. " But what?"
Taking in a deep breath, the snow pup was going to give him back the one thing she had taken away from him, hope. "What we have, is special, it is real, we can help eachother." She paused wrapping her paws around the now stunned Sheperd's neck, bringing their foreheads together. " And I do want you too, Chase."
Although more tears fell from his face, his muzzle wore the biggest smile imaginable, softly letting out quiet whines of joy.
Everest began stroking the back of his neck as they sat in eachother's embrace. " I should go, you need your rest and give your body time to heal." She cooed Nuzzling her head against his.
With a hopeful smile he responded, "Can you stay with me, I..don't want to be alone, and.. I sleep better with you anyways." He said softly, feeling his ears burn up again.
With a tender touch, the husky placed a kiss on his forehead, nodding her head up and down with a smile that melted his heart. Before Everest knew it, his arms were around her torso, pulling her down onto the soft matress next to him. Chase held her head against his chest, craddling her lovingly, getting lost in the blizzard of her icy blue eyes. Until he was pulled away by sleep's cozy embrace, taking him away from this dream come true.
A.N: OH my Goodness guys you have no idea how long I've been waiting and wanting to get these two together, especially after all of the pain I put them through. They both deserve happiness and it brings me comfort knowing that they now can face this very scary, unpredictable world together. Good to be back and I look forward to hearing your guises responses and or critique, as always, it is more than welcome and appreciated. Until next time, my friends,–W.P