No Pain

AJ was waiting inside of her father's office at work. Punk was there as well but outside in the car, she had to do this as alone as she possibly could. This was deeply personal for her and she owed it to her mother to get to the bottom of it.

"April?" Robert asked stepping into his construction office. "The guys told me there was a beautiful woman in my office waiting for me and now I think I have to go beat them up."

"This isn't a social visit." AJ warned him stiffly.

"Are you alright? Is it Phil?" Robert asked concerned and AJ could feel her stomach turn.

"I saw Eliza." AJ informed him.

"Why would you do that to yourself?" Robert asked her seriously.

"Why did you give me that check? Why did you come check in on me when Phil died but never did when mom went missing or before that?" AJ asked him.

"Your mother didn't want me around and I was trying to respect that. I felt we made some steps forward and wanted to see you and like I said the check was always yours." Robert reminded her.

"Eliza told me you two discussed getting rid of mom." AJ told him strongly. "That she never would have had Dickie do it if you didn't support it."

"That's crazy." Robert gaped.

"Is it?" AJ asked. "She said you'd be free to come home if she was gone."

"I had said that to her." Robert admitted. "I said if Daria wasn't in town I'd be free to come home. I'd get to know you. I didn't say if she was killed. And if that was my plan why didn't I come home right away?"

"I don't know." AJ said to him.

"We would talk what if's all of the time." Robert told her honestly. "What if Daria would allow me back? What if you decided to fight to get to know me? What if she left Bret! It wasn't just Daria scenarios, we talked a lot about a lot of things. I would have never expected her to act on anything we discussed."

"So you did discuss mom going away?" AJ asked. "Did you consider me?"

"My whole life has been considering you." Robert informed her.

"You gave up and left me then you joked around with your girlfriend and got my mother killed!" AJ yelled. "You are just as guilty as Eliza and Dickie as far as I'm concerned."

"April-" He began to reach for her and AJ jumped away.

"You have one framed photo in your office." AJ pointed out and grabbed the dusty photo off the shelf and showed him. "That's you and Eliza."

"That is old I forgot I even had it up! Look how dusty it is!" Robert insisted.

"You don't have any photos of me." AJ pointed out as a tear left her eye. "How could you be so cruel?"

"I would have never asked Eliza to hurt your mother- EVER. I know you were young but I loved your mother very much for a very long time. I wouldn't have done that to her." Robert insisted.

"I think you joked around with Eliza about it and she did it and you didn't even ask her about. Did you ever ask her about mom after she went missing? You never once suspected it?" She asked.

"I didn't ask." Robert admitted. "I didn't bring it up because I didn't want to know." He told her bluntly. "I knew your mother was dead just from the details at the scene. I just didn't want to know anymore it would hurt too much."

"So Eliza did as you asked and you never came home." AJ said to him. "Must have upset her."

"I was a suspect and I didn't want to come back and put you under that pressure." Robert told her.

"I would laugh if I wasn't so sad." AJ spat at him. "You should have told the police about the conversations you had with her this could have been solved quicker. She didn't need to spend half a year in a shallow grave in a crack house yard!"

"I didn't think she would do it." Robert said simply and AJ picked up the picture of him with Eliza.

"You two seemed very happy together." AJ noted. "You gave up getting to know me and my mom's life for it." she said still looking at the picture. "I'm pregnant." She told him and he froze then she looked up from the photo. "I found out yesterday. I didn't tell Phil yet. You're the first one hearing it. I don't even know this child growing inside of me at the moment but I love it more than you have ever loved me. You're not going to a grandfather to my child." She informed him.

"April, please." Robert began.

"You're not." AJ repeated. "You're not even going to be my father but that's something you're familiar with. You don't get to miss out on all the bad times and swoop in for the good times. And know that one day my child is going to ask about her grandmother and I will tell her how you and your girlfriend conspired because you were intimidated by strength."

"Please." Robert began. "I wouldn't hurt your mother and we were just getting somewhere."

"We weren't. You thought so. I thought I had to try with you because it's what Phil would have wanted but I spoke to him and he loves how strong and brave I am he's not intimidated. He supports my choices."

"I respect your choices, April." Robert assured her.

"I don't care if you do." AJ remarked sadly. "You really missed out because I'm going to have this great life and I'm going to have a great child and I will hang their picture everywhere and tell them I love them everyday. And me and Phil are always going to be a team who puts our child first. I learned so much on how not parent from you and enough from my mother to know how to parent."

"I wish you health and happiness." Robert told her.

"I already have that." AJ said to him. "I have everything and I keep feeling this void, you know? Like there's a hallow spot inside of my chest and I can't fill it, or at least I couldn't. And it was a spot that my mother left when you helped get her killed. And yesterday when I looked at my sixth positive pregnancy tests it didn't hurt as much anymore. This child I'm carrying is a gift." She informed her father.

"A child always is." Robert agreed.

"No. It was a gift from my mother. Phil tries so hard to make my pain go away but sometimes its unbearable and he'll just hold me and listen to me cry." AJ told him. "And now I get to give to a child what my mother gave me, unconditional love. I feel like most women would be so scared right now. New marriage, new home, murder trial, crazy killer still lurker and a first pregnancy- wow." She said with a smile. "But I feel nothing but good. It's saving me."

"You'll make an amazing mother." Robert assured her.

"I can't be worse than you." AJ shot back at him. "This is going to be our last conversation. Don't come around again." She said holding out the check to him. "And take that."

"That's your mothers money for you." Robert said not taking it. "I won't come around you'll never hear from me again, as long as you take that check and deposit properly. You have a child and they're not cheap. Don't cash the check and I'll move to Illinois and annoy you everywhere you go." He threatened.

"Whatever." AJ sighed putting the check back in her purse. "Good luck with your life." She said to him then walked out of his office.

"What life?" He asked quietly once she was gone.

AJ got into Punk's car as he was still parked where he left her.

"You good?" Punk asked before starting the car.

"Yes." She said feeling good for the first time in a long time as it pertained to her father. "We're all good."

"Good." He said starting the car. "What did he say?"

"I don't think he instructed Eliza to kill my mother if that's what you're wondering but he's not fully innocent and I needed to get that off my chest. I really, REALLY needed to do that so I can start to move on."

"I'm glad you did it then." Punk smiled pulling away.

Moving day had come and it wasn't as overwhelming as AJ thought it would be. They were still waiting on some furniture to come and Dean and Renee helped out as did Peyton and Jack. Inside AJ's purse was a handful of positive pregnancy tests that she was waiting to tell Punk about as well.

"Are we free to go?" Dean asked with a tired sigh. "My days off aren't meant for me to working this much."

"Yea you are thank you for the help." She said and he kissed her cheek.

"I'll come by this weekend with those fabrics I was telling you about." Renee told AJ who nodded. "The stuff will be great in your office."

"Ugh we have to come back?" Dean groaned.

"You don't." Renee said annoyed.

"Thank you. I'm flying out Sunday for Jersey but Saturday will work." AJ told her and she nodded.

"Great I'll come by after court." Renee said and gave AJ a hug.

"Thanks for all your help." AJ said to her.

"Yea, great let's get out of here." Dean said tugging Renee away.

"Good night." AJ said to them.

AJ watched as Punk cleaned up around the kitchen and grabbed her purse to pull out a positive test when his phone began to ring and she rolled her eyes.

"Brooks." He answered and she glared at him behind his back. "Yea, no, no it's ok I'll be there. Give me half an hour." He said and AJ put the test back in her purse. She wasn't going to tell him as he walked out the door.

"Everything ok?" AJ asked.

"Yea I just have to meet a CI." He told her.

"I don't want to spend our first night here alone." AJ cringed.

"Larry is here." He reminded her. "And I'll be home in an hour." He assured her kissing her before he left. "You ok?"

"Yup." AJ said to him with a smile. "I'll wait up for you."

"You don't have to." Punk laughed. "But even if you did I won't be long."

"Right." She said to him and watched him leave. She looked down at Larry who barked at her. "I tried to tell him." She hissed at the dog.

AJ had gotten comfortable on the couch and fell asleep watching Office reruns. She woke up at around 3 in the morning and looked around. Larry was sleeping at her feet and everything was quiet.

"Phil?" She asked loudly. He had left the house at around nine and he was gone longer than hour.

She got up off the couch and went upstairs to see if he was in bed and he wasn't. She trailed back down the stairs and looked in the driveway and his car wasn't there. She grabbed her phone and called his number but it went right to voice mail. That's when she felt her heart drop. Something wasn't right, he never had his phone off. She quickly searched Dean's number and he didn't answer so she kept calling him until he finally did.

"What?" Dean groaned tiredly into the phone.

"Where is Phil?" She demanded.

"What?" Dean asked confused.

"He went to meet a CI right after you left and he said he'd be an hour now it's three in the morning and he's not home and his phone is off." AJ informed him. "Why is his phone off? Where is he?"

"Relax." Dean groaned sounding more awake. "I'm sure he just got caught up."

"Just got caught up?" AJ asked him. "He doesn't turn his phone off." She reminded him. "Not with Dickie McCall still out there- oh my god what if Dickie got him?"

"Then Punk would have killed him." Dean scoffed. "I don't have any messages or alerts from him or the station."

"Because he was meeting a CI!" AJ yelled. "He wouldn't have told you or the station! I feel it Dean something is very wrong."

"Just relax." Dean said to her. "Let me make a call, ok?"

"I can't just sit here." AJ insisted.

"I understand when people run late you tend to freak out-" Dean began.

"No, Dean. I know my husband and I know he wouldn't turn his phone off on me." AJ told him seriously.

"I'm going to make a few calls just sit tight I'll call you back." Dean said then hung up.

AJ wasn't sure what to do. She as in a big empty house, her husband as far as she was concerned was missing and in a few days she had to be in New Jersey. She was also keeping a big secret to herself and was starting to panic. She could have been overreacting but she had the worst feeling in the pit of her stomach. A few minutes later her phone began to ring and it was Dean.

"Did you get in touch with him?" She asked.

"No but I think I know who he was meeting and I'm going to go check it out." Dean told her.

"Don't go alone." AJ insisted.

"AJ it's going to be fine I promise." He assured her now fully awake. "I'm dressed and already out the door just sit there."

"I can't." She said to him. "I'll meet you where ever you're going."

"No." He warned her. "I'll call you." he then hung up and AJ looked at Larry who seemed concerned in her eyes or maybe she was going crazy.

"Let's go." AJ said to the dog and grabbed her purse and keys and picked Larry up and headed to her own car.

AJ was on the empty road and racing towards Chicago. She just knew she needed to be close. She knew wherever Phil was he needed her. She was frantic and Larry was in the passenger seat next to her. She kept trying to call Dean and although his phone was one it kept going to voicemail which meant if he had no news he would have told her, this meant he had news and didn't want to tell her.

"He's fine." AJ said looking over to Larry who had no idea what was happening. "Don't worry about your dad. He's smart and strong." she was more trying to convince herself. "He wouldn't do anything reckless." She said to Larry. "He knows I'm a nutcase and has to be extra careful. He knows if I lose him I won't make it." She told her loyal companion. "We just got married and just got a house and we're having a baby and he doesn't know that yet but I really tried to tell him but I wanted to do it the right way and now what if it's too late?" she asked herself.

Her phone began to ring and she turned it on through the car speaker.

"Dean." AJ said to him.

"Why do you sound like you're in a car?" Dean asked her.

"Where is he?" AJ asked.

"I haven't located him yet." Dean admitted. "But I've got a good idea and I'm tracking his car."

"Dean." She nearly cried.

"It's fine." Dean told her. "He was meeting a CI, it's this young girl who we worked her case a while back and she calls when she's in over her head with her boyfriend."

"Where do they live?" AJ demanded.

"I'm here now and I'm waiting on them." Dean told her. "It's really fine and I think his phone died. Just relax." He laughed a bit. "When you get here just go right to my place and wait there for me, drive safe bye." He said then hung up.

"You didn't tell her?" Another Detective asked and Dean was surrounded by police lights and officers.

"No. Not until I know something solid." Dean said looking at Punk's car that was abandoned and covered in blood in front of the CI's house. There was a blood trail but it was only a few feet and then it was gone.

"I'm assuming that he wasn't attacked in the car." The Detective told him. "There isn't enough blood for that and the trail gets thicker, you see?" he pointed and Dean nodded. "I'm thinking he was jumped and tried to get in his car and get away then was pulled out."

"Fucking fuck!" Dean yelled.

"There's not gun shot residue, no shell casings, it had to be a knife or maybe a bat of some kind. He took a beating. We found a bloody tooth in the street we'll run DNA." The Detective told him.

"I want this whole neighborhood locked down." Dean told him. "There's a deli across the street they have cameras and they have workers someone saw something I don't give a shit what time it is we have an officer down and missing."

"Got it." The Detective nodded.

"You asshole." Dean said to Punk who clearly wasn't there. "Fuck!"

AJ was at Dean's apartment with Larry sipping on tea and waiting to hear from Dean.

"Are you sure I can't make you coffee?" Renee offered. "Your nerves are fried."

"I can't have coffee." AJ whispered.

"You are pregnant." Renee said with a sad smile. "Dean told me he thought you were."

"I didn't tell him." AJ confided.

"I mean, Dean is a detective so he just figured it out." Renee teased lightly.

"No I mean Phil." AJ said to her. "I had the test in my hand and then he got that call and ran out. I tried to wait up for him but this baby makes me sleepy." She cried a bit. "And all I do now is cry! I thought I was crazy but it's just hormones."

"It's alright." Renee said grabbing her hand.

"Something is very wrong. I know Dean and he was lying to me." AJ said to her.

"Well, he's not telling me anything." Renee told her.

"He wouldn't because he knows I'd get it out of you." AJ said shaking her head. "How could this happen?"

"We don't know what happened." Renee reminded her.

"I feel it." AJ said to her. "Something terrible is wrong. What if it was Dickie?"

"Punk could take Dickie." Renee reasoned.

"What if his CI set him up? He was just trying to help I'm sure and it all went wrong." AJ cried into her hands.

"You need to stay calm." Renee urged.

"I didn't tell him about the baby. Maybe if I did he wouldn't have gone." AJ said to her.

"Phil is a very dedicated police officer he would have done his job tonight." Renee said to her. "And he's so good at his job. He'll be fine."

"No he won't." AJ said shaking her head. "It's really wrong."

"You have to worry about you and your health right now." Renee insisted. "He's going to be back before you know it and you still have to tell him."

"I should have told him before he left." AJ insisted. "I was so stupid."

"Dean is on it, ok? You know Dean is like a dog with a bone. He'll find him I'm sure it's just a misunderstanding." Renee told her.

A few hours later the sun began to rise and Dean walked into his apartment.

"Anything?" Renee asked.

"Where is she?" Dean asked looking around the apartment.

"The bathroom. She's making herself sick." Renee told him. "Please tell me you have good news."

"I-" Dean began and he saw AJ walk out of the bathroom and she raced towards him.

"Dean?" AJ asked anxiously.

"It's not good." Dean began…