After clinging to Rei like his lifeline for far longer than he was comfortable admitting, Dabi finally released his grasp on her clothes so that she could separate herself from him. He could feel it in his arms that he was still trembling, trying to bury the sensation down as he kept his gaze pointedly not at the woman who had been hugging him moments prior. How could he look at her now? He had done nothing, absolutely nothing to help her or Natsuo or Fuyumi or Shouto in any way, all he did was ruin himself beyond recognition or hope of redemption.
At least, in his own mind he thought that. Rei certainly had a different idea.
The gentle touch of her cool thumbs on his cheeks caused Dabi to look up, taking in a shaky breath in an attempt to stabilize himself and stop the tears that continued to feel like they would well up in his eyes at any moment. It was painful when they would spill into the stapled cracks under his eyes, already a light prickling spreading over his face that hardly felt more than a brief numb sensation.
Rei was smiling softly at him, a detectable hint of sadness underneath it probably because of his sorry state. She trailed her fingers over his face with an almost invisible touch, wiping away the stray tears before gently brushing into his hair to push it away from his eyes. Deep in his dark locks, the hint of red was just visible at the roots, causing Rei to sigh quietly as she exhaled.
"Oh Touya.." It was probably the only part of him that actually looked like he had before, though the situation that they were in was exactly like 10 years ago. There was no denying that, as much as Dabi didn't want to acknowledge it, he wouldn't be able to erase who he was before the fateful day when he became Dabi for the first time.
As nice as it was to have such a revelation and reunion with his family, Dabi didn't think so highly of the fact that he was currently curled up into a ball on the floor of his old bedroom after having a panic attack. That part really wasn't the worst of it though, it was that he still needed someone else to take care of him in his weakness. For someone who based their entire existence on the fact that they had to be strong in order to not only survive but also be worth something, being vulnerable was not a comfortable position to be in once he had managed to be wrangled down.
It caused a taste of bitterness to grow sharply in his throat, chest constricting with the sudden pressure of contempt towards himself as he pulled his arms back away from Rei and into himself and broke away from her gaze. For every step forward it seemed like Dabi would take two backwards, opening the door to himself a crack before turning around to slam it shut and add more locks once again.
It didn't help that he was literally reliving his past either, once again bruised and burned as he broke down on the floor. It wasn't hard to see how Dabi took that as a sign that he had basically failed, going back to square one and the fact that Rei was the one needing to take care of him and not the other way around.
Rei let Dabi pull away from her hands so as to not force her presence on him, but she did try to reach out to him again. This time Dabi swatted her hand away with his back side of his arm, before curling up further into himself and not allowing her to see his face. Letting out a soft sigh, Rei gave up on trying to reach him currently, knowing that he wouldn't listen to anything that she had to say when he got into a mindset like this. Well, she didn't know that Dabi would react that way, but she knew her son Touya, and this was exactly the behavior she expected of him.
"It's okay that you don't know what to do. I'm not expecting you to be perfect, I'm just glad you're still here." Rei said softly, leaning forward to press a kiss to the top of Dabi's head before standing up. "You don't have to talk to any of them until you're ready." With that, she left his bedroom, quietly shutting the door and leaving Dabi in the silent darkness.
Dabi froze when he felt the kiss be pressed against his unruly hair, only relaxing from the position until after the door had been closed after Rei. He leaned back against the door, letting out a slightly shaky but tight sigh from his lips.
Time for him to get his shit back together, this was just pathetic.
Leaning forward again he pushed himself up from the ground, wiping the back of his hand over his face to get rid of any remaining tears still holding on between his scars and the staples holding them in place. He wanted nothing more than to leave, to just climb out the window of the room and never return again, but something was keeping him grounded here. It might have been Rei or it might have been Hawks, or it might have been both, honestly, but it was enough to make him lay down on the bed instead.
Staring up at the ceiling he squinted his eyes upwards, but all he saw was darkness. All he could hear was the quiet sound of Rei's footsteps retreating down the hallway. He knew he should try and sleep, it was late, and he knew that no one would be pleased if he stayed awake all night, but he was too tightly wound up right now. He barely had a grip on himself.
Eventually he did close his eyes, but his mind was racing. For some reason, his thoughts kept flickering back to Hawks and the soft look that he had given Dabi before leaving. Wasn't the worst thing for him to hyperfixate on, for once, at least it distracted him from the burning itch of his scars wanting to be torn up in punishment for Dabi's weakness.