FamilyTree
Monday (3:13pm)
lenaeclipse: Okay, we're officially less than two weeks away from the big day. We need updates.
yourmagjesty: pls answer her she's on a warpath
Sassquez: ^^^
lenaeclipse: I am not on a warpath. I'm simply trying to make sure things are moving in a timely fashion.
whosthatgirl: it's the lack of kale :/ She's been on edge all day long.
lenaeclipse: I have NOT been on edge!
alwayswinning: Your yelling isnt exactly proving them wrong
gunscotch: calm down lena damn. Stop acting like kale is that big of a deal
stayinyourlane: lmaoooo lena's gonna beat ur ass
lenaeclipse: NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL?! You BITCH
lenaeclipse: Listen here you little shit! I'm gonnafshddghsgfjgfjsjghsfhsg
bannedfromchilis: Oh God what happened to her?
lenaeclipse: fhdfhsfghdfghdgj
lenaeclipse: htw4875egw5es
DamnSam: Lena?
Shocked&Upset: maybe she finally passed out from lack of kale
Barney: Not possible.
Sassquez: Nah, maggie is just wrestling the phone out of her hand
YourRouler: it's quite the sight
TheDailyLane: Send a video. This would make good news.
TheCatGrant: Agreed. Get two different angles so it doesn't look like I'm using the same clip.
YourRouler: [CEOfightsforkale. m o v]
Sassquez: [LuthorGoesLoco. m o v]
gunscotch: incredible
whosthatgirl: here's a third angle
whosthatgirl: [thisissad. m o v]
whoyagonnakal: Lena's stronger than I thought
yourmagjesty: she's sitting in time out on the balcony now.
TheCatGrant: Please send pictures of that as well.
YourRouler: [lenapouting. j p g]
Sassquez: [luthorpout. j p g]
stayinyourlane: who knew the lack of kale could turn her into such a monster.
spacedad: I think we all could have predicted that.
alwayswinning: lmao dad
lenaeclipse: You're all fuckers
Sassquez: ?
lenaeclipse: Did you really think that my phone wasn't connected to my watch? Morons.
Shocked&Upset: lmaooooo
bannedfromchilis: You guys are the worst babysitters ever
yourmagjesty: I thought she was just playing w her watch!
lenaeclipse: Yeah that's what I wanted you to think. Now let me in and give me my phone before I kick your ass
DamnSam: donutqueen come get your girl
bannedfromchilis: i'm surprised she hasn't commented yet
Barney: I haven't seen or heard from her in a few hours.
gunscotch: last I heard she was at work. I called but she didnt answer
NiaSangria: just checked her office and she's not there either
Shocked&Upset: I texted her & she didn't answer :/
lenaeclipse: Wait I'll get her
donutqueen: Sorry guys! What's up!
YourRouler: LMAOOOOO
Sassquez: I didn't know you could do that?
lenaeclipse: She only does it for me :)
stayinyourlane: ? wtf happened? We wanna know!
yourmagjesty: Lena just started talking out loud and said, "Kara Zor-El look at your phone please"'
yourmagjesty: and THAT'S WHAT MADE KARA REPLY
donutqueen: I only do that for Lena
gunscotch: wtf what about me?!
donutqueen: You've never tried it! I mean, not as often as Lee does it
NiaSangria: Hold the hell on. So lena can just start talking & youll hear her?
donutqueen: Well she mumbles my full name first so it gets my attention, but yeah
Shocked&Upset: & u can just hear her from wherever?
donutqueen: Of course!
TheDailyLane: ! How have I never thought of that?!
whoyagonnakal: Yes dear, I can hear you.
stayinyourlane: :( im trying it but I guess it only works for lena and lois
bannedfromchilis: Same. I made a request and it has yet to be fulfilled.
yourmagjesty: very lame
thethirdolsen: I'm glad to know that we all tried it
DamnSam: And we're all getting ignored :/
TheCatGrant: Forget the rest of you, I should be at the top of the list. I have important things that need to be heard.
donutqueen: Cat, your request for a latte from Noonan's is not important.
whoyagonnakal: ^^^ and why are so many of you asking for alcohol? It's barely 4pm.
NiaSangria: Ah so you guys can hear us
donutqueen: Obviously. We're just drowning you out :)
gunscotch: rude. I needed something important.
whoyagonnakal: scotch is not important Alex
Sassquez: well that was one of the dumbest things i've ever read
stayinyourlane: very ignorant thing to say
gunscotch: what a fucking loser
donutqueen: So, why was I summoned?
whosthatgirl: Your wife needed to be tamed and controlled.
lenaeclipse: Bold of you to assume that she has that much power.
donutqueen: Baby, why did you need to be tamed?
yourmagjesty: yeah lena tell kara how you almost killed me
lenaeclipse: THAT'S OVERDRAMATIC
Sassquez: I saw
YourRouler: me too it was brutal
donutqueen: Is this true, Lena?
lenaeclipse: No.
whosthatgirl: Kara, scroll up. There's evidence in video form and in photos.
stayinyourlane: im loving this
thethirdolsen: it's been a while since i've been this entertained.
donutqueen: Now Alex, why would you say that kale isn't a big deal? You know she's sensitive right now.
gunscotch: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY DEFENDING HER?!
lenaeclipse: I am NOT sensitive!
Shocked&Upset: is anyone actually surprised tht kara took lena's side?
DamnSam: Kara is a simp
donutqueen: I'm not taking sides at all.
donutqueen: Lena, you know I love you, but that video does prove that you were being a little unmanageable, babygirl.
yourmagjesty: A LITTLE?! SHE TRIED TO BITE ME
lenaeclipse: :( I'm sorry daddy
gunscotch: NOPE
stayinyourlane: pls continue
NiaSangria: ew ew ew ew ew
TheCatGrant: Lena's daddy kink is old news.
MamaDanvers: I'm sure the two of you could finish that conversation elsewhere.
spacedad: This is the inappropriateness I was telling you about Eliza.
whoyagonnakal: Just because it's old news doesn't mean we want to hear about it.
YourRouler: weak
spacedad: I would like to address the very first question that was brought up in the beginning. The ONLY relevant thing that's been said this entire time. Regarding the wedding planning, what have we gotten done in the past week?
gunscotch: lame
TheCatGrant: ? It's literally your wedding.
Sassquez: then tell us what you got done since u wanna nerd out
bannedfromchilis: I-
TheDailyLane: Well we picked the venue.
TheCatGrant: It'll be at my vacation home on the beach, since they insisted on having an outdoor wedding.
yourmagjesty: blessed we'll love u forever
gunscotch: ur a queen
DamnSam: We've secured most of the decorations that we need. We'll be going to decorate early on the morning of the wedding.
NiaSangria: The colors for the wedding are red, black, and white. So try to wear colors that fit that color palette so that the pictures look nice.
gunscotch: DO NOT WEAR WHITE OR I SWEAR TO FUCK
yourmagjesty: NONE OF U FUCKERS BETTER WEAR WHITE
whosthatgirl: :/ guess I gotta take my dress back.
stayinyourlane: same :/
alwayswinning: i think we'll all have to take our dresses back :(
gunscotch: oh fuck off
spacedad: Any other updates?
Shocked&Upset: well we haven't been able to book a caterer bc these hoes dont know wat they wanna eat
gunscotch: we literally said pizza
whosthatgirl: WE ARE NOT SERVING PIZZA AT YOUR WEDDING
yourmagjesty: :/
Barney: If they want pizza, I don't see why we can't do pizza. Sal's Pizza delivers.
gunscotch: see! Sal's delivers!
DamnSam: Eliza, please help us out.
MamaDanvers: Maybe we can come to some kind of compromise, hm? Maybe some type of gourmet pizza bites?
yourmagjesty: as long as it's vegan
YourRouler: ew
whosthatgirl: Wait, Kara didn't you have an idea about food?
alwayswinning: kar?
YourRouler: i think her and lena r sexting
Sassquez: [hornylena. j p g]
Sassquez: She's been typing away on her phone since she called kara daddy on main
stayinyourlane: at least they got a room
lenaeclipse: Sorry yes, I'm here.
donutqueen: I, too, am present.
MamaDanvers: You two sure are a couple of horndogs, aren't you?
thethirdolsen: gksbgjbsdfgsdjfkgsduhgjdsfh;jdfsha
DamnSam: Lmaooooo
Barney: They are.
bannedfromchilis: Lmfao
gunscotch: lol nice mom
donutqueen: Eliza please
lenaeclipse: I-
MamaDanvers: It's okay girls. I'm glad you have a healthy sexual relationship.
spacedad: Please don't encourage them.
donutqueen: Alright MOVING ON
whosthatgirl: Sorry to interrupt your sext fest, but we were talking about food for the wedding
Sassquez: Sext Fest would be a dope ass band name
Shocked&Upset: ^^^
donutqueen: Oh! I was gonna suggest breakfast food!
alwayswinning: ...breakfast food?
donutqueen: Yeah! Both Alex and Maggie like breakfast food. We could have like a tower of pancakes and a tower of waffles. A vegan/vegetarian side and then a side for people who actually like good food!
yourmagjesty: im gonna ignore that jab bc i actually kinda like tht idea. wbu babe?
gunscotch: if we can we have unlimited bacon im in
whosthatgirl: I-...does this mean we won't have to compromise the pizza?
yourmagjesty: no pizza if we can do the breakfast thing
whosthatgirl: Works for me. Send me a full menu and I'll get on it.
gunscotch: good call Kar!
donutqueen: :)!
spacedad: Great! Any other updates?
whoyagonnakal: Kara and I will be going to the beach house this weekend to build an extension to the deck that Cat already has. That way there'll be plenty of room for all of the guests and food etc.
donutqueen: Plus we're putting up a big tent over everything! Should only take us about 3 hours
lenaeclipse: Very sexy.
alwayswinning: lena chill
stayinyourlane: no no i agree with her this time
TheCatGrant: So glad I'll finally be getting my deck extended. It's been on my list of things to get done.
Sassquez: that a euphemism?
stayinyourlane: i sure hope so
gunscotch: it's our pleasure Cat! it's the least we can do since u offered us your place
yourmagjesty: love uuu
whoyagonnakal: ? We're the ones doing all the work!
donutqueen: ^^^!
yourmagjesty: oh thanks i guess
gunscotch: we're paying u fuckballs in food stfu
MamaDanvers: Have you girls found what you plan on wearing for the big day?
gunscotch: yes ma'am
yourmagjesty: no ma'am
TheDailyLane: Christ
NiaSangria: Wow, I actually expected it to be the other way around.
DamnSam: Same honestly
Sassquez: that's why we all met up at l-corp we're spending the next two days shopping
yourmagjesty: yayyyyy (sarcasm)
gunscotch: aww it's okay babe im sure u'll find something
spacedad: I'm sure you'll be fine Maggie. Have you all decided if you want a band or a DJ?
yourmagjesty: dj
gunscotch: ^^^ we've already made an epic playlist
stayinyourlane: cant wait to shake my ass to some bops
TheCatGrant: Hell yes
Shocked&Upset: cant wait to watch
spacedad: Alright, that's enough.
spacedad: Looks like we're making good progress! Let's keep it up! Dismissed.
OperationMarryMaggie
Tuesday (5:02pm)
donutqueen: okay did i completely skip a day or something? Alex i thought u didnt have a dress?!
TheDailyLane: ^^^ I thought I was losing my mind, because I definitely didn't remember getting one!
stayinyourlane: she doesnt have one yet! she's a lying sack of dough
gunscotch: alright fine yes i lied! But that's our business!
TheDailyLane: Well then, when do you plan on going to look for one?
gunscotch: Sunday?
stayinyourlane: lmaooo six days before the wedding i-
donutqueen: Alex this is bad planning
TheDailyLane: I have brunch on Sunday!
gunscotch: WELL TELL UR LITTLE BRUNCH FUCKERS THAT YOU'VE GOT BRIDESMAID DUTIES BC WE'RE FINDING ME A FUCKING DRESS
stayinyourlane: lol little brunch fuckers