Chapter 38

The moon and stars were just beginning to fade from the sky as I sped away from the headquarters, keeping close to trees as to not be spotted. The rush of energy that gave me the strength to leave the hideout was quickly dwindling. Just a little longer, I told myself again, doing my utmost to ignore the exhaustion that was setting in.

I was flying as quickly as my dying body allowed, but I was too disoriented to know where I was, or what direction I was heading in. Despite Giovanni's warnings, my only thoughts revolved around finding a town or somebody, anybody that would know how to save Lilly. Large, black spots were appearing in my vision, but I pressed on. We must be close to somewhere by now . . . right?

I noticed that I was suddenly flying faster, and my heart nearly stopped when I realized that I was no longer holding Lilly.

No!

I sped down and caught her in my arms again before she hit the trees. That mistake depleted the last of my energy, I knew I could go no further. I quickly lost altitude as I lowered both of us toward the tree line and through the branches. Once I was close enough to the ground, I turned on my back and landed in the leaves with a soft thud.

I paused for a moment before releasing my weak grip on Lilly, my arms falling to the ground beside me. The taste of blood was strong in my mouth as I inhaled the crisp night air. At that point, I could not see very well in the dark, but wherever we were, everything was still and quiet. I was grateful to have a brief moment of respite after the chaos from earlier. I laid there and tried to catch my breath, but it was a great effort to continue breathing through the pain. Though she was small, Lilly's weight made it even more of a challenge, but it was of no concern to me.

In those final moments, it was difficult to think about anything at all as I felt myself rapidly lose consciousness. "Li . . . lly . . ."

There was so much I had not said to her, and many more things I would never get to apologize for. Tears began to spill from my eyes again, and I pulled up both my arms from the ground to wrap them around her. She was cold and provided no comfort, but I still held her as tightly as I was able to. My arm shook as I lifted it off her back to search for one of her hands with mine. When I found it, I brought it to my chest and held it there, desperately wanting to transfer any remaining life I had inside of me to her. But it was pointless, as my powers were completely gone by that point.

"I . . . I'm sorry . . ." I managed to whisper.

I'm sorry you won't see your Pokémon or family again. I'm sorry for ever hurting you. I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to save either of us. The list continued on in my head, blurred under a haze of anger at myself for allowing this to happen to her, and hatred for the people who were responsible for her death. I cried out weakly in frustration, trying to look down at Lilly's pale face with the occasional crimson splotch of my dried blood, but I soon lost the strength to keep my head off the ground.

Arceus crossed my mind briefly. Was he also gone forever as a result of her careless action? But to be truthful, my thoughts of him were mostly bitter ones. Where was he when we needed him most? Did he allow Lilly to access the power to save me, but not her as well?

I felt my breath grow shallow and my pulse become faint as the seconds passed. My grip on Lilly began to slacken again, but I refused to let go of her hand. Looking through the trees above, I saw the deep orange glow of the sunrise begin to illuminate the sky, setting it ablaze with color. Breathing a shallow sigh, I closed my eyes and felt the world begin to fade around me.

My eyelids flew open again only seconds later when I felt a burning sensation on my chest.

I did not have the strength to lift Lilly and see what it could possibly be, but it grew stronger with each passing moment. Something bright caught my eye, I knew that it had to be the opal that lay between us. But the pain was no longer greatest where the stone was as the searing pain began to spread all over my body, the agony I felt quickly surpassed that of the bullet wounds. I opened my mouth to scream, but no sound came out. There was a shrill reverberation as a blinding white light obscured the rest of the forest. Then, everything went dark.

Another bright light flashed.

Upon opening my eyes, I was completely surrounded by white. But the surface I laid on was smooth and cool, and I quickly got to my feet. As my eyes adjusted, a strange sense of calm came over me. Where . . . am I?

Almost as if to answer, something caught the corner of my eye. I thought I was still watching the sun rise, because the area above me seemed to turn red. As I walked toward it, more colors came into view against the white; deep blues, bold reds, cheerful yellows, and lively greens. They continued to change even after I stopped walking and even began to appear on the sides and the floor below. Like small, shapeless fireworks, they scattered across the white background before fading into nothing, just as the next color exploded.

I looked around, but there was nothing to look at with the exception of the flash of colors. Though I could not see the ground below my feet, I knew that I was standing. Wherever I was, it appeared as though I was completely alone.

Is this . . . supposed to be what humans call 'hell'?

"Definitely not Hell," a youthful voice suddenly sounded.

I jumped in fright. "You again?!" I asked, turning around so quickly I almost lost my balance.

She was standing several paces away, her feet no longer covered in blood, and looking at me with knowing eyes as she always did. I had only seen her face in the dark previously. In this light, I could clearly see her for the first time. She might have been about half Lilly's age, with deep blue eyes, much paler skin, and a stick-thin frame. Her ankles seemed as thick as the chord behind my head, and her collarbones were very visible. If there was any wind in this place, it likely would have blown her away.

Despite her feeble appearance, I still took a step back, recalling that she deflected my powers in the hideout.

"You . . . why did you interfere back there?" I demanded.

She slowly approached but did not answer my question.

"Why do I keep seeing you? Who are you?" I asked, my voice rising in panic.

"Mewtwo, you really don't remember me?" she asked suddenly.

I gasped at familiar I found her voice when she said my name. Everything else she said afterward was lost instantly.

"How did you know . . . my name?" I asked quietly.

She sighed and pressed her hollow cheeks with her hands as if she was not sure of what to do. Curiosity quickly overcame my fear, and I had many questions. "Have we really met before?"

She shook her head and said, "No, we've never met," before taking a few steps and coming to a stop in front of where I stood. "But . . . I know you. And you know me, too."

I continued to study her face, but I was interrupted when the girl reached out her hand and gazed at me expectantly. I looked at it, unsure of what was to come next. But after allowing myself a moment of deliberation, I trusted her and did so.

I had hardly touched her palm before everything went dark again. Seconds later, we were standing in a dark room. The only light came from the screens and technology that was present I instantly recognized it, the realization hitting me like a punch to the stomach. Five large, empty tubes filled with fluid stood in a semicircle at its center. I looked around for other people, but there was nobody else was in the room. "Do you know this place?" she asked, looking up at me.

I was silent for a moment as I took everything in. "This . . ." I forgot to finish my sentence as I looked around some more, but there was no mistaking where she brought me. Though I was only conscious here briefly, everything was almost exactly as I remembered it. "This is where I first woke up. Where I came into existence."

I completely destroyed this lab on New Island, leaving nothing standing. I even destroyed that castle, especially my lab, that I created on top of it afterward. How were they able to recreate it exactly? Before I could ask her, a body suddenly formed in one of the tubes, surprising me. My eyes went wide, it was the very same little girl who stood next to me.

"I– . . . Impossible!"

I looked from the girl with me, to the girl in the tube, and back again. I took a step closer to the tube, not believing what I saw. "You . . . are you a—?"

"None of this is real," she said, also looking at the body, "these are my memories. After I died, I stayed by my daddy's side and watched it all happen. He was in charge of making . . . oh, there they are."

I had questions about what she meant by "stayed by my daddy's side," and who that person was. But I looked up in time to see Pokémon begin to appear in the other tubes, one after the other: a Squirtle, Charmander, and Bulbasaur. When the last one appeared, I did not recognize it. In the low light, I thought it might have been another human child, but then I saw its large feet and tail.

"That's you," she told me, pointing to the final tube.

I was aghast. "You're mistaken," I said quickly, "I never looked like that."

"It's true, that really is you!" she said again.

I continued to stare at the being she claimed was me. He was perhaps the size of the girl herself, with much rounder features than the ones I had now. He looks so small, I thought, still in disbelief, there was really a time when I was . . . that?

"We . . . well, you were made here," she continued when I did not respond. "I kind of got to name you, actually," she added afterward, laughing to herself a little.

As the initial shock of seeing myself passed, I began to piece together what she was telling me. "You said . . . your father was the one responsible for my creation, right?"

She nodded confidently and said, "That's right."

I finally recalled her question from the hideout, the one she asked when she approached Giovanni. The first thing I felt was guilt. There was a moment of silence before I tried to explain myself. "I . . . I'm the one who—"

"I already knew that you killed him," she added, understanding my silence, "but that man you were fighting, the leader . . . I know it's really his fault. I forgave you a long time ago."

"But, how?" I asked, shocked, "Aren't you angry?"

"I think . . . maybe I was angry at first because he was my daddy," she admitted. "But even though he was my daddy, I know he wasn't a very nice man. I didn't know at the time, though."

"I don't understand," I said impatiently, looking at her and pointing to the clone in the tube, "that's you, right? Aren't I speaking to the clone right now?"

"Hang on, I have more to show you," the little girl interrupted, and everything instantly went dark again.

"Show me? Can't you just tell me what's going on?" I insisted.

"I can't," she replied, her voice bordering on desperate.

"And why not?" I asked defiantly.

She shook her head, then turned to me with determination in her eyes. "You need to . . . you have to remember."

Before I could continue to protest, we were suddenly under a blue sky. I looked down instinctively and saw that we were over a suburban neighborhood. I knew I had never been there, yet I had definitely seen it somewhere before. "What is this place?" I asked, frustrated when I could not recognize it myself.

"Do you remember yet? This is where I used to live," she said, then directed my attention further ahead. The five clones were a good distance away, but I could see the girl was pointing to different places on the Earth below excitedly.

"We never actually went here back then, but I was able to share all of this with you using telepathy, just like I am now. I wanted to tell all of you about the home we were gonna wake up to."

I blinked as I finally began to recall everything that she was mentioning as she said it. I watched in fascination as the younger version of myself darted this way and that around the little girl and the other Pokémon. We were all laughing together. I . . . wasn't always alone? When I saw him smiling that way, I felt a dull ache in my chest. Somehow, it was all beginning to come back to me.

"Then . . . what happened?" I whispered hesitantly.

Without warning, the scene around us turned black again. Alarms could be heard faintly in the distance.

The Pokémon looked around in confusion, then the Squirtle exclaimed as he slowly began to fade away into nothing. He was quickly followed by the Bulbasaur and Charmander. I watched as the smile instantly disappeared and tears formed in the eyes of the younger version of myself. The little girl approached me, saying something I could not quite make out from where I was before gently wiping them away. I cried out and tried to grab at her, but she was fading away as well.

"What's happening? Why are they failing?" I turned and asked the girl.

"You asked her that back then, too. But I still don't know, even now," the girl next to me replied quietly, still staring ahead at the two clones.

I suddenly realized that the weight in my chest from earlier was back again as I watched this event unfold. I reached out toward the image of myself from years ago, but I did not dare approach it. He began looking around in confusion, searching for any sign of his companions.

"No, you can't leave! I . . . I need to save my friends! I have to!"

The moment I heard myself think those words, I gasped.

I could see this happening, but we were also back at the laboratory. People were scrambling to right the situation, pulling different levers and flipping switches as the alarms steadily grew louder. The other tubes were empty, but mine was still visible. He was writhing with his eyes were wide open, but he did not seem to be looking at anything. The monitors surrounding my tube appeared to be displaying some data that was clearly concerning to the scientists. "We can't lose him, too," someone looked over their shoulder and cried out, "this will all have been for nothing!"

"We have no choice, then! Erase the memories!"

"Get him stable!"

His head was in his hands as he curled up into a ball and finally became still. The monitors on his tube gradually began to resume normal activity. Everything went black once again.

Almost exactly like in the vision, the little girl came up to my height and gently wiped the tears off my face with her small thumbs. As soon as I saw her that time, the answer to all the questions I had, at last, became clear.

"A . . . Amber," I said finally.

Amber sighed and smiled enthusiastically as if she had been waiting to hear that for a very long time. "Yes, that's my name!"

"I remember," I choked out, "Your name is Amber, and I . . . I remember you!"

She reached out and hugged me with all the strength she had in her little body. I hugged her back and levitated off the ground. Everything about her was exactly the same as it was then, and the nostalgia was almost too overwhelming for me to bear.

"Ever since that day," she said into my shoulder, "I've been watching you."

"You have? For all these years?"

I felt her nod before she continued, "Even if you didn't know I was there, I remember how sad you were when my clone left. I didn't want to leave you here all alone. But lately, you've been seeing me because I've been trying to tell you something important."

"I . . . I know." I laughed through my tears, "I understand why you were so adamant now. I had no idea that any of this . . . I never knew this part of myself."

"You don't have to be alone!" She backed away, looking at me excitedly, "I know you were born kind because you cared so much about us. You were always able to be good."

I nodded, finally collecting myself. "But also, you already loved Lilly," she continued, "you just didn't believe that you could do that, either."

My breath caught in my throat. I let go of the girl and backed away, remembering what had come to pass. "I . . . Amber, I . . ."

Another thought suddenly occurred to me, and I stopped breathing for a moment as I processed the idea of never seeing her again. It felt as though all the air had left me, I could not speak for a moment. "Mewtwo?" she asked, confused by my response.

"Oh," I finally gasped. I sank to my knees, still unable to breathe.

I heard the girl alight on the ground in front of me, but I did not look up. "Why are you—?"

"I'll . . . I'll never be able to tell her now!" I managed to say before I began to sob violently.

"Wait, but—"

"She's dead, Amber! I can't . . . tell her any of that," I gasped out. "After all of this . . . after everything—"

I suddenly felt her small hands on my shoulders. "Mewtwo, wait a minute," she shouted over me, "she's going to be okay!"

I looked up to see Amber standing on her feet. "Don't you know where we are? She must still be alive, that's the only way we can be in here."

Nothing she said made sense to me, and I grew angry. "What the hell are you saying? I held her corpse in my arms for an hour! Of course she's dead!"

"No, she's alive. She must be, I feel her in here."

I stared at her in confusion, waiting for her to explain further.

"Oh, that's right, you really don't know where we are," she clapped her hands together, finally realizing that I did not understand at all.

The white room I first saw appeared, along with the random bursts of color. "This Opal is Lilly. I found this when you two first met, and I usually stayed in here because it's safe. But since you were the only one alive who had seen me, it gave me the energy to appear in front of you and Giovanni, and also to hug you like I just did. If she were dead, this . . . room wouldn't be here."

"You mean . . . we're inside of the opal she wears around her neck?"

"Yeah, but, it's a lot more than just a necklace. This . . . all of this is Lilly," she said with more emphasis.

"I . . . I don't understand. It is nothing more than a stone containing Arceus, right?" I asked, looking around for her.

She sighed, "You'll get it someday. I don't think I would explain it very well. But you'll see her soon, I just know it."

"Lilly is . . . she's . . . she survived?"

Though I was struck by her cryptic response, her conviction was so strong that I could not help but trust her. I remained on my knees and put my head in my hands, relieved beyond words.

"Besides, it's time for me to go now." I looked back up at her and saw that she had come very close to me. She was beginning to glow faintly and fade away as she did in the vision she shared with me only minutes ago.

I was surprised. "Wait, you're leaving?"

"I have to, I'm . . . going to where I belong," she said, her voice cracking at the end of her sentence.

Suddenly, tears were running down her own face. "Why are you crying?" I asked, growing concerned. "Do you want to stay here?"

"No, no, I'm sorry," she said, wiping her eyes, "I'm not sad."

"Humans cry when they are not sad?" I asked, baffled.

"Yes, and Pokémon too," she laughed.

I was still confused. "Then, what are you feeling?"

"I'm . . . very happy. You're finally going to get the love you deserve. I can rest knowing that you'll be happy."

"I'm also happy," I said in reply. "I'm grateful that I got to see you one last time, and that I could remember you."

I threw my arms around her and stood up again, overflowing with more gratitude than I ever knew I could feel. "Thank you, Amber, for looking after me for all this time." She pulled away and smiled through the tears running down her face. "I won't forget what you did!" I said, feeling tears come to my own eyes again.

The light and her touch began to fade at the same time. "Tell her . . . that her life is a gift!" she called out to me, but her voice seemed like an echo as my vision grew dark.

Author's note: After the reviews I got this week, I knew most of your questions would be answered with this next chapter so I worked really hard to make sure it was ready to go. But now I can't STOP working on it so I'm posting it before I lose my mind (it is TECHNICALLY wednesday in my country!)

I hope you enjoyed! This was probably one of the most difficult chapters for me to write and I'll probably revise it again in the future, but I'm pleased with how far its come! I'm going on vacation to the beach starting today so the next chapter will definitely take two weeks, but I have a little surprise for you all with that chapter!

Stay safe and stay healthy!