How's everyone doing? I hope all is well and safe with you all.
ana sofia: you came back! wishing you luck in your exams.
bandrocks: I gotchu boo. I promise you some goodies.
blueno: thank you! i meant to write to you in the last chapter but it slipped my mind. again, THANK YOU.
To everyone else. I am loving your theories and dedication to the suspense of it all. Chapter 59 will explain a lot about the speculation of the Will. It will be really detailed so y'all gotta pay attention in the class.
Chapter 57 – Life updates.
CPOV
Thursday, March 19th, 2020
Whenever I've spoken to Welch, it's always been a serious conversation with barely any emotion. However, when he called to tell me that 'project hellfire' had lit up the sky... the elation in his voice made me chuckle.
Elena may be in the ground but the remnants of her poison still remained on the surface and had to be scorched off of the face of the earth. Fire was the only way to disinfect.
The investigation into how Elena's house caught fire wasn't pursued with much dedication. Money really helped with that.
We've been trying to acquire Esclava but to no avail. SARVAK conveniently bought the building they are located in, making this even harder. We've offered Elena's lawyer 3 times what it's worth through an anonymously registered shell company but Leila and Phoebe are not interested in selling.
The Friday Ana and I were in San Francisco, Elena's lawyer took a little field trip to the Cayman Islands and walked straight into a bank only to come out with a worried expression on his face. He got into the backseat of an unmarked SUV parked by the bank and exited the vehicle precisely five minutes after looking like his ass got handed to him.
We have no idea who was in the car. All payments for the rental were made in cash. Of course it was.
Elena had something in the Cayman Islands and whoever was interested in it, doesn't have it. The only information we've got is that there was a safety deposit box. According to Welch's information the box was accessed in early December, except travel records that we pulled on her show Elena hadn't been there in almost eight months.
Another piece of the Elena Lincoln puzzle that I need to fucking figure out.
Phoebe and Leila flew into Sea-Tac and checked out the remains Elena's beloved house that Saturday we were in SF. They barely spent five minutes on the property before getting back into the car and driving back to the lawyer's office. The property has been put on the market. I'm tempted to buy it to tabula rasa that shit into oblivion. But I'm not keen on giving them my money now.
They left Seattle the same day and resumed their normal routines. However, Phoebe has remained indoors ever since. That's what we're having trouble figuring out. How is she getting out of the apartment building undetected? There is no way she's been in there this entire time. Similarly with Akash, he still can't be cooped up in Rothstein's apartment.
Two weeks ago, the cash deposits to Leila's account stopped. Last week, Leila up and quit her restaurant and college continuing ed job. No real explanation. She too hasn't been seen for a week. The $500,000 in Credit of America joint account with Phoebe was withdrawn.
They both have disappeared into thin air.
We can't ask Susannah, she's still residing at the apartment and working at the restaurant. If we approach her could alert them and then we're further shit outta luck.
It's frustrating as hell.
FLASHBACK
Saturday, September 16th, 2017
"Permission to speak freely, Sir." Leila asks as we eat dinner.
"You may." I reply.
She still keeps her head bowed. "Sir, I understand that you've been busy with work and that it has required you to travel often as of late..." she swallows. "I really have enjoyed our time together... you have mentioned on many occasion that you are pleased with my submission."
"Get to the point, Miss Williams."
"I want you to be my Master. I would be honored if you collared me and kept me for forever." She looks up at me for the first time.
Oh fuck. Not this again. While she's the first one to ask me to collar her... what she's essentially asking for is 'more' but under the pretenses of the D/s relationship and I am not in the market for that now or ever.
I try to curb my frustration. Truth is she has been exceptional. Best I've had so far but... I shake my head. "Miss Williams..."
"Please call me, Leila." She said with a small smile.
"Look Leila, I am not in the market to collar a submissive. Yes, you have been exceptional so far and I have enjoyed our time together but what you are asking I am unable to provide you with. "
"Mr. Grey, we are good together. You know it. I want to be yours."
"Miss Williams, you are crossing a line."
"Christian, please." She pleads.
I get up from my chair. "ENOUGH..." before I can say another word she interrupts me.
She stands up and looks up at me in defiance, fire raging in her amber eyes. "I want to end our arrangement effective immediately."
She turns and walks away, running up the stairs to her room.
Fuck her.
I pick up my phone and text Taylor that the arrangement with Leila Williams is over and to escort her from Escala as soon as she's done packing up her shit.
I'm going to kill Elena. Just for once I want a sub that isn't so fucking delusional.
...
Thursday, September 21st, 2017
I meet Elena at the Mile High Club for our bi-weekly dinner to discuss the salons and any sub-related issues.
"Elena, where the fuck do you get these women from? Are you recruiting them from an asylum?" I'm at my wits end now after this Leila bullshit."
She cackles like a witch.
"You're hilarious, Christian. No, Leila came highly recommended. You saw the references. She'd been a long-term submissive for a minimum of 2 years at a time for 3 Doms."
"Yeah, well she couldn't last a fucking year with me, without going on that god forsaken, 'I want more' spiel."
"Honestly, I think you're just being a little bitch because she's the first sub to end a contract with you. She rejected you before you could reject her." She raises an eyebrow while maintaining that smug expression that does nothing for her plastic face.
"Don't fucking goad me, Elena."
"Well, as I've always said, if you want an arrangement where you have no danger of the sub wanting more, I'd be happy to fulfill that need, darling." She raises her glass to take a sip for the overly expensive champagne she's inhaling on my dime.
I take a deep breath try to and keep the bile from rising up.
"Listen to me, Elena... get it through your botox filled brain that what we had is over. O-V-E-R. That ship has sailed and sunk like the motherfucking Titanic. At the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean where the sun doesn't even fucking shine. Now, get me a sub who is preferably a pain slut and can take a good fucking without dreaming of hearts and flowers at the end of it."
She laughs and gets up to leave.
"Christian... you can deny it all you want but what we had was... exceptional." She smirks.
"Get the fuck out, Elena."
She really knows how to get on my fucking nerves.
FLASHBACK ENDS.
"Sir, are you sure you only want to take Prescott and Sawyer with you?" Taylor's voice cuts through my myriad of racing thoughts.
"Yes, Taylor. We don't intend to do much of sight seeing. We'll be keeping a pretty low profile... and for some reason Ana believes that if I keep dragging your ass with me that Gail will never marry you." I chuckle and Taylor smirks and nods.
I hear Welch snort but quickly recover.
"What more do you have for me Welch?"
"Sir, we've been having Miss William's mother followed. She had an appointment at the local hair salon where she shared that her daughter got an opportunity to teach art to underprivileged children in Haiti."
I scoff. "Well that's a load of shit."
"I set up an alert for their names should they appear on any commercial flights but nothing so far aside from the flight to Seattle to meet with the lawyer and check out the house."
"$500,000 can only get them so far. This has Kapadia written all over it. How the fuck is he doing this Welch... you told me you have you best men on this."
"Sir... you did mention he's working with ex-Mossad for security, they are some of the best in the business... if he really is connected to all this."
Thank you for that little tid-bit Rania Raees.
'Well, then hire the fucking NSA, Welch. I need motherfucking proof so I can put him in the ground."
He nods and looks down. I can tell he's just as frustrated as I am. I know he's doing his best. God dammit this fucker. What is his end game?
FLASHBACK
Friday, November 15th, 2019
"Sir, Mrs. Lincoln is here to see you."
"She doesn't have an appointment."
"Sir, she's being rather... insistent." I can sense Andrea's annoyance. You're not that only one who can't stand her anymore.
"Fuck... okay, send her in."
A few seconds later Elena sashays in. She really needs to update her look. The skin tight, all black Mistress vibe is not doing her any favors in her old age.
"Christian, darling... you've been so busy." She purrs.
I roll my eyes but don't get up from my desk and signal her to sit across from me. I'm not in the mood to exchange her pleasantries.
"Look Elena, this is the last time I'm letting you in here without an appointment. This shit is getting really old."
"Well, you barely answer my texts or take my calls. We haven't had dinner in weeks. I know you're busy but Christ... you'll expire if you don't beat the shit out of a sub soon."
"And whose fault will that be should I expire? I gave you o simple motherfucking directive to find me a submissive who wasn't bat shit crazy... at this point I think you're doing this just to piss me off."
"I've sent you the best of the best. What do you want me to do? Start a mail-in-submissive service and import them from obscure corners of globe?"
"Yes. Get me someone who can fulfill my needs. If you have to import their asses from Antarctica... get it done."
"Honestly, Christian... you know I actually shared an elevator with a brunette on the way up, long brown hair and lily white skin... she looked like your type... she was a little mouthy talking to her friends but you could probably train her."
Brunette at GEH? I need to look into this. Hopefully she's ugly. I hope she's ugly, that will be the best deterrent. She's probably too low on the totem pole. An intern maybe? I need to ask Welch about this.
"Elena, we don't hire brunettes and even if she is an employee... I don't shit where I eat."
She rolls her eyes and normally that would piss me the fuck off but I can't be bothered right now.
"Maybe if you broadened your horizons a bit. Go for... blondes, red heads?" she waves her hand around.
GAG.
"No. Brunettes, who can take a good punishment and fuck. This shouldn't be so fucking difficult. There are enough people in the community... or do I have to reach out to someone else?"
She shifts in her seat and I register the slight alarm in her face.
"Look, Leila reached out to me recently and she would like to sub for you again."
"Fuck no."
"She's willing to sign a contract where she promises not to ever mention any bullshit about 'more' or whatever. She wants to be a good ol' honest sub."
"I do not contract subs who I've terminated or who have terminated contracts with me. What, so she's miraculously cured of her 'affliction' of wanting more with me? Wasn't she married?"
"He died 6 months ago and she's looking to get back into the lifestyle and she says you were the best she's ever had. Christian, she was exceptional you said it yourself. She's the only sub you've ever said that about. It was just one infraction. Think of it this way... you can really take it out on her for terminating the contract with you. Make sure she can't sit for a weeks. Honestly, it's a win-win situation for you both."
I rub my face. This woman really loves the sound of her own screeching voice "No. Move on from this now."
She huffs our in frustration. "Fine, I have two prospects, they'll be ready to interview next week."
"Reach out to me in two weeks. I'm flying out to New York and then it's Thanksgiving. If my schedule allows then we can pick this up in early December."
"You sure you'll be able to last till then?" she chuckles.
I look at her. "I've lasted a year without this shit before... what's a few more weeks."
"Just looking out for you darling." She shrugs.
"If you were really looking out for me... we wouldn't be dealing a string of bat shit crazy women. Let me make this clear. This is your last chance. If this next sub is a disappointment, I'm going in a different direction and reaching out to others in the community. I'm sure the East Cost has some good offerings."
"Christian, you're being dramatic. Look, I'll reach out in two weeks. Till then, know that I'm always here to help."
I roll my eyes. I wouldn't fuck you even if all my billions were on the line.
"Elena, you can show yourself out. I have another conference call I need to log in for."
She gives me a smile but her face is frozen stiff to move. "Bye darling, good luck with everything. I'll reach out soon."
END FLASHBACK.
APOV
We head back to the bedroom after dinner to pack for our Miami trip. I'm not looking forward to waking up again at 2am to fly out tomorrow but we're trying to make the most out of this weekend since we're leaving Miami Sunday night at 11pm... I'm probably going to be an asshole for the remainder for tomorrow. I don't do well with very little sleep unless I have something incredibly important to do which can help distract me from the lack of sleep, that where the adrenaline comes in.
"I actually am done packing. I was going to take out some things for you but I wasn't sure what you wanted to take... so, I guess I'll just keep you company." I shrug and gather the remainder of my things to put them in my carry on.
"That's okay baby, I don't take that much time to pack any way."
"You've been to Miami before right?... Wait... of course you have. You probably have business there."
He lets out a small laugh. "I've been to Miami a few times yes. We have some holdings there."
"Do you like it?"
"It's just business. I never really formed an opinion of the place. It's like any beachfront city, I suppose."
"Hmm, I guess. I'm actually really excited, I used to watch this Miami based show called Burn Notice and really was intrigued by it... hopefully we'll get some time to explore."
"What do you want to see baby?"
"There's an ice-cream place and donut place I want to try, there's a Cuban café also, and everything is in Little Havana." I laugh. I can't help it... food is the first thing I look for when going some place new.
"Why am I not surprised?" He smirks.
"Are you mocking me Mr. Grey?"
"No baby, just appreciating your dedication to food."
"You better be... anyway... I really want to see Gianni Versace's Mansion if we can."
"Why that place in particular?"
"I don't know... I'm just curious I guess. I watched this show the guy who shot him and I went into like this deep dive internet search rabbit hole of sorts and yeah... I just wanna go and check it out."
"You're weird, you know that."
"Yet you still love me." I bat my eyes at him and he shakes his head and chuckles.
We continue to talk a little while we finish the last of our packing.
"Why haven't you been to Miami before this? I mean you're close to Karan, I'd assume you'd have gone to visit him?"
I feel a heaviness creep over me. "Yeah... I guess, I didn't want to stir any shit, plus it was bit of a money thing too. Karan and Kate actually became good friends after he came to visit me in Portland a few times and they both tried to organize a trip where Kate and I would go but... I chickened out..." I shake my head. "I... I..."
FLASHBACK
Wednesday, June 29th, 2016
I take out my wet clothes and put them in the dryer. I debate whether to wait it out till it's done or go back upstairs for a nap... actually, I'll probably go into the game room and play a videogame to pass the time. I walk out of the laundry room and make my way down the hallway past the stairs, humming...
I'm so into you
I can barely breathe
And all I wanna do is fall in deep
Just as I reach the threshold of the game room, I feel someone push me in and as I turn around I see him closing the door and locking it.
No.
Please.
No.
I'm completely frozen.
He grabs me and pushes me against the wall.
"Are you and Karan a thing now. Tell me a truth."
Breathe. Get out of here. Breathe. Remember what dad taught you.
He's pressing me against the wall with his body and holding my neck in place. I can't breathe... I feel like I'll die. Please. Please let me go.
"TELL ME." He's fuming as het gets in my face.
"N-no" I whimper.
"Then what the fuck is that article about?"
"Just a rumor." I can't speak. I need air. I look around. My eyes are blurring. "Karan bhai is my brother."
"You better not be with him, Aana. Do I have to remind you of your place?"
"Please Vishaal bhai... Please..." I beg.
Breahte, Ana. Breathe.
"Don't. Call. Me. Bhai." He whispers menacingly in my ear and I feel like throwing up as one hand travels down the side of my body, feeling me up as I feel his erection press into me. "If I ever see you with him, if you ever even try to go see him... I will know and you will regret it."
He leans into my neck and I try to squirm away, crying, silently praying to god to save me. He takes a slight step back and I feel my legs have some room to move. I raise my leg and knee him in the groin and push him off with all my might and run.
RUN.
I don't care.
JUST RUN.
I run up the stairs and I keep going till I reach Nani's room on the 2nd floor. I open her door and I see her napping. I quickly walk into her bathroom and lock the door and sink to the floor trying to calm my breathing and crying.
Safe.
You're safe.
I don't know how long I stay here crying but when I'm finally a little calm. I walk back into the room and Nani's still napping. I lay next to her and try to sleep.
I close my eyes and try to chase a dream holding on to the necklace dad gave me.
But all I feel inside of me is darkness.
So much darkness.
FLASHBACK ENDS
"Ana baby..." I hear an echo. "Baby... what's wrong?" It sounds so far away. What?
Christian?
I blink.
I feel hands on my face.
WHO ARE YOU?
DON'T TOUCH ME.
CPOV
She stops talking and just stands still.
"Ana baby..." I call out to her but she's lost looking down. "Baby... what's wrong?" I ask again.
I hold her face and she blinks but doesn't register. I look into her eyes and call her again and rub her arms.
She starts to blink rapidly and looks around and clocks my hands on her arms and pushes me away.
"NO." She screams and starts to shiver
Fuck.
"Ana, it's Christian... baby, look at me." I say softly.
She looks around again and her breathing is labored.
"Baby, you're in safe place..." I try to coax her back into the present.
One of her hands flies to her neck, trying to look for something. She's trying to grab on to something but she can't feel it. She looks down to her neck and shakes her head. "Where is it?" She whispers.
"Ana... baby... what are you looking for?" I take a tentative step towards her.
"I... I..." She shakes her head again.
"Baby, you want to sit down. Just for a minute." I say gently and she looks at me confused. I kneel in front of her and her eyes follow me and she mirrors my movement.
I hold out my hand. "Baby, take my hand... tell me what's going on?"
She blinks again and looks at my hand intently.
"Ana... tell me what happened baby." I swallow, she's lost somewhere and I need to get her out of this. I can't keep calling Kate... I need to figure out how to do this on my own too.
"He'll come for me. He told me not to go to Miami." She's staring at my knees and her face is tense.
"No he's not baby, you're here with me. He's never going to hurt you."
That fucker. The fucking piece of shit.
She blinks again. I reach out to hold her hand, stroking her knuckles with my thumb.
"Ana, do you want to talk to Ray?"
She nods. I feel my throat burn and the emotion of what I'm experiencing is almost too much. I grab her phone from the bench and open her photostream and go through the dad folder. I move to sit adjacent to her and play a random video.
Nita is holding the camera as she follows Ray into Ana's bedroom where she's fast asleep.
"HAPPY 17TH PRIVATE STEELE." He yells and Nita laughs in the background.
"God. Dad, it's too early... please..." Ana groans. It makes me smile. She looks adorable. 17 year old, sweet and innocent Ana.
"Come on, get up. I'm making pancakes. Breakfast of birthday champions" He bribes her and she raises her pillow slightly and looks at him with a raised eyebrow.
"There better be peaches and caramelized pecans with that." She sasses
"Only the best for you, Luna."
"Fine... I'm coming... five minutes." She hides her face back under the pillow.
"If you're not down there in next five minutes, I'm bringing up the ice-bucket." Ray bellows.
"Ufff Mama, control this old man of yours." She groans while Nita giggles.
The video ends and she giggle. It makes me smile. It's a beautiful memory to have on camera. I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear and she looks back at me and suddenly confusion mars her beautiful face and she looks around.
"What happened?" she asks in a low voice.
"I think you had bad memory, you blacked out for a bit."
Her eyes widen even more in alarm. "What did I do?"
"Baby... it's okay... you just were lost for a bit and when I called out to you and held you... you got a little scared."
Her breathing quickens and I can tell she's about to freak out.
"Hey... baby, look at me." I hold her face. "Look at me, Ana." She looks back at me, tears start to fall from her eyes. "Just breathe. Take deep breaths okay, you're safe." She nods and breathes in and out and I lean in to give her a small kiss.
"Did I say anything? What happened?" I hear the panic in her voice.
"I had asked you about going to Miami, why you never visited before and you were telling me about a plan you and Kate made and then as you were talking you just got lost. When I tried to talk you out of it you said that he told you not to go to Miami."
She looks down at her knotted fingers. She's pulling at them with a force and I put my hands on them to stop her and gently squeeze her hand.
"Talk to me baby, just relax, you're in a safe space okay... he's not here. No one here is going to hurt you. Tell me what happened."
She begins to tell me how he forced himself on her after Rania's wedding because he thought she was with Karan because of the tabloid rumors and threatened her to never meet him or ever go see him otherwise he'd ruin her.
"Listen to me baby, he will NEVER hurt you. You're free now."
She silently nods and I pull her into my lap and hold her. She clings to me and rests her face in the crook of my neck. I rub her back, kissing her temple as she holds on to me for life. I can feel her fear... and my heart aches for the times she was alone with no one around to comfort her.
"Baby, let's take a bath and relax."
...
"I'm sorry." She says after a while of us sitting in the bath
I kiss her cheek "Why are you sorry baby?"
"You're busy and I shouldn't be monopolizing your time like this."
I turn her face to me and see the tears fall. "Ana, you're not making me do anything I don't want to do. I want to be here, I want to be the person you turn to and lean on when you're feeling like this."
She looks up. "Do you think I'm crazy?"
"No. You're not. I think you're tired. You're tired from trying to keep it together. I honestly don't know how you did it before... I'm in awe of you but you don't have to be so strong all the time."
Her conversation from last week with Nita comes to mind.
"Aanu, what did I tell you before you left SF after the wedding... remember when you asked me about falling in love with Ray?"
"Yeah... you said I have to let myself be my absolute self be with the one I love... that I should let their love carry me sometimes... that I don't always have to be strong."
"Exactly, your partner shouldn't just love you because you're happy all the time. They should love you in sadness too but you have to let him love you in sadness."
She doesn't say anything and her eyes remain downcast.
"Look at me Ana." She raises her eyes to look at me and I hold her face and kiss her. "He will never touch you again. He can try but he'll never touch you like that again. I know you've asked me to wait till the 3rd quarter and I will but after that all bets are off. He tries anything after that and I will eviscerate him, I know you want to protect your family but you are my family and I can't let this go on. Once the Will is read, no matter what the outcome... if he comes after you in any way... I will not hesitate."
Till then, I'll still continue to monitor the fucker and gather as much evidence I can against him... even if it's circumstantial I will use whatever resource I can.
She looks down and I see tears fall from her eyes. She nods and I pull her in for a hug and she cries softly against my chest.
Authors Note:The next two or three chapters will be about Miami where Ana tells Aashu... there *may* be some drama on the horizon in regrads to that... but we love ourselves some drama.
Pinterest: www dot pinterest dot com/paleseptember10/50-shades-of-love-and-light/
I added a board to the pinterest called 'Characters' I had been meaning to do that. Anyway, since pinterest is weird. you'll have to click on each pin and scroll to the bottom to see who the character is.