I'm high on the power of the cliffhangers *evil laugh*

As mentioned in the last chapter, this one will have a lot of details on the Will speculation. SO Y'ALL PAY ATTENTION. Also, Ana is not pregnant... not yet. Did I just give a spoiler? Oh I don't know. Maybe, maybe not. Muhaha.

gowildcats; GIRLFRIEND! forgive me. much love, hehe.

Blueno: That means so much that you read through and try to pick up on clues. There are easter eggs in most chapters fo sho. Everything will reveal itself in due time. I appreciate your support, you da best.

guestfan: I hope this covid crap ends soon and you can pinch your grandson's chubby cheeks and hear his laughter in person asap.

imaginationgirl91; I promise some more Rania and Aria interactions in the future chapters. In fact, there's a really cute Aria and Christian interaction coming soon :)

For some reason, fanfiction isn't showing all the reviews but I'm receiving email alerts of all reviews that you leave so i'm going based off of that.

Side note: In case you haven't noticed, I'm really putting Ana through shit in this story and i'm not done yet. You all will hate me but I have promised a HEA. Gonna stretch this story till the find the absolute cure for covid-19. We need the distraction even if it makes me go upto 2 million words. So if this ain't your cup of tea... don't drink it.

Chapter 59 – Make the most of your life, while it is rife, while it is light.

Saturday, March 21st, 2020

CPOV

"What did she mean by the kill switch for KGI?"

"She hasn't told you?"

"Karan, there is a lot that I don't know and I'm trying to be patient but the fucker... seeing the terrifying effect he has on her... I can't bear it. She hasn't been sleeping well since she came back from SF and that was almost three weeks ago. There's something going on and it's fucking with her brain. You heard her just now."

He looks down and nods. "Follow me to my study, I'll tell you what I can."

I take a seat on the couch and Karan places the bottle of whiskey on the table between us and takes a seat on the Eames chair across from me.

"Ask me whatever you want and I'll try best to answer as much as I can or am allowed to." He offers.

I nod. I have so many fucking questions. My mind is racing.

"What are you thoughts about the Will?"

"Ah, going in the for the kill." He smirks. "Well, it's all speculation at this point. The 3rd quarter wait really threw everyone in for a loop. I have three scenarios in mind. I'll share them with you in order of most likely to least likely."

"Shoot."

"Okay scenario one is complicated but I think most likely because it makes sure that everyone in the family is taken care of and that the wealth isn't concentrated to just one side of the family or person. I suspect the Will is executed according to Islamic Law... in which all Muslim blood relations have first dibs. Immediate family followed by extended family. Also, my understanding of Islamic law and the religion is elementary at best but I do know that your wealth is meant to be shared among all your family once you've passed on. You are allowed to only give 1/3rd of your wealth away to charity or a blood relations that are not Muslim or an adopted child or friends and so on and so forth... but you cannot exceed the 1/3rd percentage. The rest of the 2/3rd is to be distributed in varying percentages among your wife and children and the later on extended family. It's complicated but it ensures that everyone is taken care of."

"But Ana is Muslim, so she would get something out of the 1/3rd?"

"If Abdul Karim chose to leave her something then yes, she would get something out of the 1/3rd with Vishaal and Kiran since they're Hindu. I personally think AHAK will be restructured and everyone will have shares in the business according to the percentages laid out in the will... but... whatever Nita and Alia get, once they pass and I highly doubt their Wills would be drawn up in accordance to Islamic law, they will definitely be passing their assets directly in their entirety, on to their children. In which case, Aana could possibly inherit Nita's shares, making her the largest shareholder in AHAK, given that Alia's shares will be split between Vishaal and Kiran. Again, that is only, IF Abdul Karim has left Aana something out of the initial 1/3rd. If he hasn't and Nita still leaves her shares to Aana... Vishaal and Kiran will end up having majority shares of AHAK. Again, there are a lot of ifs and different permutations of how things could turn out in this scenario."

"But either way, that's good right? She'll be taken care of."

"Aana wants nothing to do with the business side of AHAK, she doesn't want to be tied to VIshaal and Kiran in that way. That's why she's waiting because she wants to make sure nothing is left to her and whatever is given to Nita, she will ask that she not be left anything."

I run my hands through my hair. Fuck.

"What the second scenario?"

"Second scenario is that everything is left to Nita and Alia from the get go. After they pass, Nita leaves her share to Aana, again making Aana the majority shareholder in AHAK. Given that Alia's shares will be spilt between Vishaal and Kiran. However, if scenario 2 is what happens, Aana is in shit because... if Nita still decides to leave Aana everything, her being the majority shareholder, Kiran and Vishaal won't be able to buy her out and Aana will not sell to an outside party. She can choose to gift her shares to other relatives but that will cause a rift... oh also, Aana is not legally adopted by Nita so Vishaal and Kiran could try to hit her with a lawsuit but I doubt they'd win."

I groan. This is such a fucking mess.

"What your 3rd and least likely scenario?"

"Everything is left to Kiran and Vishaal in its entirety."

"Yeah I don't see that happening." I laugh.

"Same here but I know that he did love them and he did groom them to take over... so it's honestly the waiting game to see what happens."

"What about Nani?"

"What about her?"

"She gets nothing?"

"She doesn't need anything. I mean realistically, she's got what, another 20 years... she's got her personal assets, she's more than taken care of. Abdul Karim was a kind and fair man, I have no doubt that he will make sure every member of the family is taken care of but in the event he doesn't leave Aana anything... Nani will make sure she takes care of her through her personal assets."

I have no doubt she will, the kicker is... will Ana be too stubborn to accept?

"What the kill switch for KGI?"

"Now we're getting to the good stuff." Karan smirks and takes a sip of his drink.

"AHAK owns 40% of KGI, the kill switch is the morality clause and it isn't just a regular morality clause it's a kill switch because the contract between KGI and AHAK is that not only are all European and American KGI assets under AHAK's purview but that should the morality clause be breached in any way, AHAK gets to walk away with all the assets and KGI gets back those 40% shares only in name and not in value."

"Holy fuck." Abdul Karim is a genius.

"Indeed." Karan laughs.

"Why the fuck did you dad and Rish Kapadia agree to this?"

"They were desperate. Uncle Rish is a bit of a loose canon. He made some bad investments and needed outside capital. Him and Alia were hell bent on getting married even though Rish was bit of a player and Abdul Karim, though initially against the union eventually relented but wanted to ensure his daughter's happiness and marriage by trapping him so that he would never fuck her over. My dad hated the deal but it was also the only way uncle Rish was going to stay in line and it was better that KGI stayed in the family than be sold to outside investors but that didn't last long. KGI did end up selling more shares to outside investors thanks to Uncle's Rish's blunders and until 10 years ago we only had 25% of a stake in the company. My father has been slowly buying back shares and we're now at 35%... but we still have a long way to go."

"So, if Ana were to tell everyone about what Vishaal did..."

"If proven it would trigger the morality clause and AHAK would retain all those assets. We would be murdered by our shareholders and forced to sell the remaining shares to recoup our losses."

"So you and Aashu get screwed over either way the Will goes."

"Yeah.. because no matter what, because of AHAK, Vishaal and Kiran will always have more shares in KGI than Aashu and myself and I honestly don't care. I've told Ana not to worry about us. I'd happily sell my shares, I'm already building my nest egg with Tony, I'm fine. Aashu, has no ambitions like that, she would rather just work with the family. Imran comes from money too, so they'll be more than comfortable... but in the end Ana really wants to be able to walk away quietly."

I cradle my face in my hands. "This is a clusterfuck, Karan."

"Exactly. So, another glass or you want the bottle?"

"The bottle." I say and we both laugh.

Fuck.

"Why is there so much animosity between you and the other Kapadia siblings?"

"Well, look at us, we're fucking gorgeous." He laughs and shakes his head. "We also did way better in school than they did growing up... it actually started when we both applied to Eton. I got in and he didn't. We used to be really close actually but with distance came the eventual jealousy. Uncle Rish was street smart and my dad was booksmart. My dad had bit a stutter and liked to remain behind the scenes. Actually my dad and Abdul Karim are alike in many ways but... yeah, Vishaal growing up, he was a good kid. Really talkative, playful and we had a lot of fun but then after I left for Eton, he did okay in school, not the brightest kid and Uncle Rish had a temper. He wanted his son to be the best and the brightest and he was quite the disciplinarian and quite fond of the drink. I'm talking using his belt to prove a point." He looks down and takes a few moments.

"Slowly, Vishaal changed, he became this insufferable fuck and I couldn't stand him but he actually started doing really well in school. I guess the discipline really pushed him over the edge or something. I honestly couldn't tell you. At 16 he got into Harvard and did really well for himself. He was motivated... was in the top 5 to top 10 all throughout undergrad, law school and business school and he's done really well for both AHAK and KGI. Kiran's animosity towards us is all because of Vishaal's manipulation. He can do no wrong according to her. I don't know why he's jealous of us, we're not even in the same league, we have different priorities... it's honestly stupid."

"Where does his relationship with Ana fit in all this? I know he was a huge part of her recovery but she won't tell me details..."

"Well, it's because those memories are painful to revisit for her and also to tell you... well, what boyfriend wants to hear that stuff?"

"Yeah I guess, but I just want to understand her and be able to help her."

"Look, I can give you an idea but given what happened and after everything, it's hard to keep an open mind about it all because it is fucking painful to think about. They were seemingly good natured and innocent interactions that had ill intentions behind it. They are the kind of interactions you'll see Aashu and I have, or I'll have with Rania and Aana. We're affectionate people, we hug our sisters and kiss their foreheads, it's a cultural thing... but..." he pauses for a few seconds.

I swallow. "I still want to know."

"Aana will have my balls for this but... look, when he first met her, it was normal. They took her under her wing and it was a normal relationship like she has with all of us, except she was much closer to them and it made sense because Nita and Alia are so close and Nita practically raised them too. When the accident happened... she didn't wake up until the following spring when he was back home and he would visit her everyday, talking to her... then he was in his last year of business school but he would fly back every other weekend to spend time with her and he'd call her everyday to see how she was doing. Kiran had taken a year off to prepare for law school and work with the business. She also helped out a lot till she got into law school in New York and moved away. Once Vishaal was done with business school, he asked to only help out with West Coast deals and American deals in general. He didn't want to travel unless it was absolutely necessary. He became devoted to Aana. He'd take her to physical therapy appointments if he could, he'd talk to her and keep her company, have dinner with her every day. He moved back into the house for a while. They were best friends. He did what he would do for Kiran and what I would've done for Aasha... basically what you'd do for family, it's what you would do for Mia... at least... that's what it always looked like and nothing ever seemed suspect about it."

"Then why the fuck did he do what he did?" I get up and start to pace. How can you claim to love someone like a sister and then...

"Honestly, I couldn't tell you. I mean... it was so out of left field. The only explanation was Florence nightingale syndrome but like with an obsessive streak, obviously."

"He fell in love with her because he was taking care of her?" I stop and look at him.

"Yeah. She needed him. She's always wanted family. She wanted a sibling and that's what he was to her... but she never would see him for what he wanted her to see him as."

I take my seat again on the couch. "He wanted more."

"Yeah but again, it doesn't explain why he did what he did. I honestly think it was an impulsive decision."

"You weren't at her going away party?"

He shakes his head. "I wish I was... but I was in London for work at the time and Aashu was in New York getting ready for school."

"I want to kill him Karan."

"I'm right there with you." He says in a low voice. "Aana and I fought a lot the first year I found out. I pushed her to tell Nani or Nita but she wouldn't listen. She was too scared and she still is but at least she's opening up... I had to learn this the hard way that in the end, this is her choice. It is her journey and I have to support her in however she wants to do all this because that's what she needs. Support. Someone in her corner because if we fight her battles for her, she'll never find peace. She's right, none of us have been there when she's gone through the really fucked up shit. If this is how she wants to fight then this is her choice. She wants to be responsible for the decisions she makes. So much has already been taken from her and she had no control over it..."

"But what he's doing is still controlling her reactions and her life. He still has a hold on her."

"And it will take time Christian... she just started fighting back because she has something to fight for. She's fighting for herself more than anything now. You just came into her life so you may not see that but I've seen such a change in her since Rania's wedding. I have you to thank for that."

"She doesn't deserve any of this Karan. It fucking rips my heart into a million pieces to see her like this." I tell him about Ana's blackout when I asked her why she never visited Miami in college and how the fucker threatened her not to ever see Karan after Rania's wedding. How she still will have nightmares and cry out. I see his face tense and he looks to the floor and rubs his eyes of tears.

He takes a deep breath before speaking.

"He knows her. He knows how to rile her up and ever since you guys got together he's really pushing her. Yes it was bad before but she also rarely ever visited and when he did address her public she responded as normally as she could. That day at the brunch was the first time she really hit back, she's never done that before. I suppose it's now because she can see her life moving in a different direction. She doesn't feel alone like that anymore or maybe she's finally regaining the confidence she used to have before the accident happened. I don't know what it is but she's getting stronger and I suspect it has a lot to do with you both being together... as beautiful as that is, it will still take her time."

I nod.

"Do you think he's building a portfolio outside of AHAK?"

"He'd be stupid not to. I mean you've always got to have a plan A through Z."

"Have you ever looked into him?"

"Nah, I don't give two shits about him or what he's doing. It's a waste of my time. My only concern with him is in regards to Aana. That's it."

I nod. "So he wants to marry Ana because he thinks she'll get a share in AHAK."

He finishes the last of his drink. "Yes but that's not the only reason. I really think that he believes that he loves her. It's dangerously obsessive but the possible share in the inheritance is a bonus. Which is why you should marry her." He chuckles.

"She's making me wait till after the Will is read."

He takes a deep breath. "Yeah, she told me. She's doing that to protect you. She's scared."

"Why?"

"She doesn't want him to hurt you."

"He can't fucking hurt me."

"She seems to believe he can. Look, she loves you and this is how her brain works. She's trying to protect everyone she loves, all while protecting herself."

Fuck, why won't she tell me this shit. I want to help her... why won't she let me?

Karan starts to speak and brings me out of my reverie. "When I first met Aana... she was such a cute kid. I had flown in for Ray and Nita's wedding celebration and she was the cutest thing you ever saw. Her eyes went wide when she heard I had a British accent too. She asked me all the questions she could. I couldn't even ask her anything about her... she just wanted to know about my life and how England was and honestly the most mundane shit but she made me want to tell her all those things." He smiles fondly at the memory. "She never cried, she was always happy and smiling. She was like another Aashu for me, except maybe a little more annoying given that snap of hers." He laughs. "Still, in the end, you just wanted to be around her..."

I smile and nod. "For some reason, when I met her at the wedding I ended up telling her stories about my childhood that I'd never shared with anyone outside of the family... I'd never opened up to anyone like that. She does have that quality, she makes you want to tell her things and she knows how to make you feel at home."

"Yeah, she does."

"She told me about this one time you guys went to visit her in Montesano and she took you to the gun range." I laugh.

"Mate... the words fucking psycho don't even measure up. The look in her eyes, I swear to god I almost shit my pants. She just went bang bang bang and looked back with this most smug face." He laughs out loud. "She's always been such a great kid. Ray did such a great job with her and then she just became Nita and Nani's little wonder."

"Where were you during the accident?"

"I was in London for the holidays, visiting friends and the like. I was told after the New Year, I immediately flew back and drove to Olympia from Sea-Tac. It was carnage Christian. This girl who could command a room with her energy and had us all wrapped around her finger... seeing her like that was gut wrenching mate." He shakes her head and rubs his face. "I didn't get to see her much during recovery because I took over for Vishaal at AHAK in addition to the work I was doing for KGI. I'm still retained by AHAK on a consultant basis for some of their deals... and whenever I did see her it was hard to not be affected but what she was going through. Even after she started to speak, she'd be so quiet. Only Vishaal and Kiran could get her to talk aside from Nita or Nani... She'd only confide in them or look to them. Before she went off to college, that summer, it was Eid, the religious holiday after Ramadan and we all had gathered at the AHAK family house. Anytime all of us got together, we'd sing because Nana liked the idea of music in his house and watching all the kids playing games and being normal. That afternoon after lunch, Vishaal coaxed Aana into singing a little. She was so shy but it'd been forever since we'd heard her voice in a group setting. She barely spoke, she's was always hiding upstairs in her room, her energy wasn't like what you see now... she's made tremendous strides since then but yeah it was an emotional moment for all of us to hear her sing. She used to sound like a tone deaf duck before." He chuckles "...but then after the accident... there was so much pain in her voice and she sounded so different. She was a completely different person after all that and even more so after... well..." His mouth sets into a hard line and I can tell it's a lot for him.

He pulls out his phone. "I actually have a video of it... fair warning, she's sitting with Vishaal and you'll see how familiar she was with him."

I swallow. "It's fine... I actually like being able to see pictures or videos of her from before everything happened. There's so much I don't know about her."

Karan smiles and gives me his phone. The video plays. It shows Ana and Vishaal sitting on the floor in the formal dining room with all the other cousins. Ana looks beautiful. Her hair is long and braided, hanging off to the side. She's wearing all white and she looks angelic. Not a stitch of makeup but she wearing bangles and shyly smiling.

Karan plays the acoustic guitar and they all urge her to sing a little after Vishaal tells them she has a beautiful voice. Ana shyly tells everyone she'll sing a couple of lines. Her voice is low and her smile seems sad, it's missing the confidence that she now speaks with. Karan starts to play, fingerpicking the melody and gives Ana the silent go ahead to start singing. She sings in Urdu, it's only a few lines. She stares at the floor and it sounds incredibly sad. She sings only a few bars and then ends with a smile. Vishaal puts his arm around her and kisses her temple and she beams at him and giggles, followed by Karan and everyone else claps.

"What was she singing about?" I feel the strain in my voice.

"It's a song Nita used to sing to her at night sometimes. It roughly translates to "my heart longs for the time when I could sit and picture the face of my beloved all day and all night long.'"

"It's beautiful."

"Yeah." He gives me a small smile.

"I want to help her Karan. I'm really trying."

"I know. Just be there for her. I know it's difficult for you too but we can't even begin to fathom what she's going through. She's got three years of really cherished memories with a person who she trusted and confided in during an extremely vulnerable time in her life when she was rebuilding herself... I can't even imagine the level of strength it takes to block all of that out of your mind and go on. I know she's trying to move on and create new life for herself but he really did a number on her. The manipulation runs deep. I know her spending time with us isn't easy because when we look back, in almost all memories, him and Kiran are center stage... and we're not just talking about those three years, we're talking about the years before that. Since she was 10 years old."

"You think he's had her eyes on her since she was 10? Because that is..."

He interrupts me. "No, I don't. At least I hope not. I really think this is a by-product of taking care of Aana in recovery."

"Why doesn't he just move on? Didn't he fucking date in college?"

"He did but he never brought anyone home. He just fucked around and it's always been casual with him."

...

APOV

I had hoped that Aashu's reaction wouldn't have been so severe but then again she is Karan's sister. The minute I told her, tears started to fall and the very quickly her fists clenched in anger. This is what I was afraid of. If I had told Rania the whole truth she would've murdered Vishaal by now. She has an even worse temper than Karan and Aashu combined which is why I chose to test the waters by telling her a very watered down version of the change in my relationship with him.

I walk out to the pool and lie on the grass by the dock, looking up and put in my airpods to listen to music. Spencer followed me and I feel him rest his head on my belly. He's such a baby, all he wants it to be pet... that's all I am to him. A petting machine. My mind drifts to the days after my deposition during the Rothstein debacle. The fear and nerves from that whole ordeal set me back a little. I needed the wheelchair again. I'd be walking and suddenly feel weak to continue so I spent my days at the apartment just looking out the window. I had wanted to check out the James Turrell installation called 'Meeting' at MoMA PS1 in Queens but I didn't want to go alone. I asked Kiran but she cancelled on me twice and for some reason it really fucking hurt. I was lonely and sensitive. I quickly realized I was relying on her and Vishaal too much. I needed to get out. I needed to make friends who were mine and not connected to the family. I need another identity. I was losing myself. I was too focused on trying to walk and speak again that I lost myself. I didn't know who I was anymore beyond my accident and loss.

My fight with Vishaal just a few weeks earlier wasn't helping. It was the first time we had ever fought in the entirety that I had known him. He yelled at me and raised his voice. It scared me but I apologized while trying to explain my reasoning for my decision but he still didn't listen. He left. He flew out to Europe to help with some of the AHAK-KGI deals that were in the works. I'd email him and text him every day but I would get no response. He wouldn't return my calls. Each email was an apology and I'd continue to tell him about my day or something new I had read about, trying to continue our daily tradition that was such an integral part of my life now. When I couldn't take it anymore, I asked to intern with Kiran at the New York office. I needed to get out of the house and out of SF. A change of scenery.

It turned out Kiran felt really guilty about cancelling on me though she never really said it. She called me up one day and told me that she had arranged for me to have an appointment to experience the installation on a Tuesday evening, even though the museum was closed on that day. Billions really do talk.

I thanked her and on the day of, it was a crisp April afternoon in Spring. Benny was going to drive me out to the museum and I got there an hour and half before sunset. The Director of Exhibitions himself was there to meet me. I felt that was unnecessary but I thanked him profusely for letting me view the installation on an off day. He was kind and led me up to the third floor and opened the room and I took a seat and relaxed myself. I asked Benny to join me too but he smiled and said he'd wait for me outside.

I took out my phone and plugged in my headphones to listen to music and leaned back to look up through the opening in the ceiling to view the sky. The cool air seeped in but it didn't bother me. I knew exactly what song I was going to play on repeat. Sufjan Steven's album Carrie and Lowell had come out and it was an homage to his late and estranged mother and how much he missed her. I resonated with it because it was during these days of loneliness I was missing Dad a lot. I needed his strength when I walked into the Southern District offices to give my account of what I had seen and heard. I was going against a man that had too much money. He could find me and ruin me but I wanted to protect my family too. They had done nothing wrong. The colors of the sky slowly started to change along with the soft ambience of the LED lights in the room creating a warmth that I longed for but could not find. It was a beautiful sensory experience coupled with the song I was listening to.

Did you get enough love, my little dove
Why do you cry?
And I'm sorry I left, but it was for the best
Though it never felt right
My little Versailles

The sky went from blue to a deep orange, to purple and then... black. Like a fire that burns bright but slowly crawls back into an ember then... nothing. That's how I felt now. I was losing the embers of myself.

Sometimes Dad and I would sit on the garden chairs in the backyard and watch the sky change color. He'd sit there with his beer and I'd be there with my snap of a mouth and we'd talk about life, well... I talked and he'd listen and laugh at my utter ridiculousness.

FLASHBACK

"Private." Dad calls out.

"Sargent." I respond.

"I think I really like Miss Nita."

"Sargent, when did you become so mushy?"

"Are you giving me lip, Private?" He asks, thoroughly amused.

"It's my job Sargent." I giggle.

"We're going on another date this weekend."

"Good. You better sweep her off her feet again. I don't want her to fail me in school cause you dropped the ball on this mission." I sass.

"Yes ma'am." He chuckles. "Are you sure you're okay with me seeing her, because the minute you are uncomfortable, I'll stop." He assures me. He knows how much I hated how Carla hopped from man to man. After husband #2 she was dating some rando from Texas. I could never keep track.

"I really like her Dad and you don't have to worry about me. She wouldn't be a teacher if she wasn't a good person, right?"

He smiles at me. "You're right. She is a good person, Luna."

"Do you think you love her?"

I can tell he's a little taken aback by my question because he takes a minute to respond. Raymond Steele is rarely ever speechless unless he's dealing with me of course. "I'm still getting to know her Luna but I can tell she's really special and I would like her to be in my life, if it's okay with you."

"I'm okay with that. After all I did introduce you two." I shrug. I honestly wouldn't mind. I have this feeling she would be a good mom. I don't know why, but I do. "Did you love mom?"

He swallows and looks back up at the sky. "I did and I tried to keep loving her but... look Annie, I don't want you to hate your mom. She had her own issues, so did I and I guess we weren't meant to be. It happens sometimes, as you grow in life, things get..."

"Complicated. Yeah, I know." Complicated had become my word of choice as of late. There was a lot I didn't know about the world and human beings were at the center of it. Complicated. Things were always complicated. I could read all the encyclopedias, watch all the documentaries and listen to all the songs but I'd never be able to figure out human beings.

"I don't want you to hate your mom, Annie."

"I don't hate her but I don't love her either dad. It's okay... I was just wondering if it's possible to fall in love again." It's the truth. I don't feel much for her but I do long for her sometimes and while I'm still a kid, I wonder if love exists for everyone and that it's kind.

"Love comes in many forms and it's never the same. I had been in love with a woman before your mom, as we grow and change our definition of love changes too."

"I hope I don't grow up to be complicated like Carla."

"Stick with me, Private and you won't." He winks and I laugh.

"Sir, yes sir!" I salute.

FLASHBACK ENDS

Shall we look at the moon, my little loon
Why do you cry?
Make the most of your life, while it is rife
While it is light

We're all gonna die.

As the song plays on and the notes of the piano echo in my ear, I feel the warmth of my tears trickle down my cheeks. I open my eyes and they're glassy. I look at the sky and it's orange fading into a pink and purple, and through my blurry eyes it looks like an impressionist painting. Soon the sky fades to a dark blue, while the city lights illuminate it from below and I feel the breeze come in with the leaves of the palm tree sway into my frame of view. I long to hear the quiet and rustling leaves of our trees back in Montesano as they lulled me to sleep while I played connect the dots with the stars, then Dad would pick me up and tuck me into bed.

Goodnight, Luna.

I wipe my eyes and will myself not to break down into uncontrollable sobs. I manage to calm my breathing but the tears continue to fall as I absentmindedly pet Spencer's head.

CPOV

Karan and I walk out of his study and we head to the kitchen to find Aashu and Tony prepping dinner. Aashu apologized again, I never doubted her sincerity the first time but I told her I understood where she was coming from because I felt the exact same way. She gave me a small smile and thanked me saying I was now definitely part of the family given the drama. We all laughed a little. I asked where Ana was and they told me she was out by the pool.

I walk out and find her lying in the grass petting Spencer. The sun has already set and as I get closer I see her wipe her face and look up at the sky. I can see her try to control her breathing as she does and I wonder if she's experiencing another bad memory.

I walk a little closer and sit down on the grass next to her. She turns her head to me and looks at me before sitting up and putting her phone and air pods away.

"Bad memory?"

She swallows and speaks with a small voice. "A sad one."

"You can tell me anything Ana. It won't change how I feel about you."

She simply nods and looks out to the water.

"I fucked up Christian." She starts and takes a steadying breath to stop the new wave of tears from falling but she fails.

I move in closer and hold her hand. "Tell me baby."

"Not here. It's too much to talk about here. I don't want to ruin the day more than I already have... let's just have dinner and then go back to the hotel."

"Sure baby, we'll do that." I kiss her cheek and we get up and head back inside.

...

Ana's started to feel better as we dig in to dinner. Tony's made all his great grandmother's specialities and the food is incredible. Ana's started smiling and laughing a little when suddenly her phone rings.

"Sorry, it's Rania, I'll be right back."

"It's okay Bachay, take it here." Karan tells her.

She accepts the call and Aria appears on facetime.

"Who is this?" Ana laughs.

"Aana Khalaaaa ishhh gremlinnnn." Aria giggles.

"Is it now? I miss you baby... guess who I'm with... I'm with Karamoo, Aashu Khala, Christian and my friend Tony..." She shows the phone around and we all wave as Aria squeals.

She talks to her for a bit till Rania comes and takes the phone from her.

"You bitches!" Rania says under her breath and Ana laughs out loud and quickly runs over to Karan's seat to hold the phone in front of him so they both can talk to her.

"Jealous, that I'm spending time with my favorite cousin in the universe?" Ana sasses.

"Fuck you guys. I wanted to be there too, I really need a vacation." She whines.

"You were invited." Karan says matter of factly.

"Blame it on my husband, I swear to god I'm about ready to divorce his ass." Rania groans.

"Raniapa don't say that." Ana chides.

"Oh, I will say that... he's out there saving lives when he should be saving our sex life." We all laugh at the table and she cackles.

"Why is it that married people feel the need to constantly talk about their sex life?" Karan groans.

"Why is it that single people are such miserable fucks?" Rania sneered and Karan flipped the bird at her making us all laugh again.

"What happened Raniapa, Ruby unable to get landing rights?" Ana wiggles eyebrows.

"Fuck you, Sapphire... and yes, Ruby is grounded for the time being." Rania whines and laughs again.

They talk a little more and Rania tells Karan to call her when he has a moment so they can talk business.

"Okay, I'll leave you guys to have fun and get fat on pasta while I sulk in the corner with my bottle of wine like a jealous bitch. Love you guys. BYE MR. ONE HUNNID. AASHU, I'LL SEE YOU TUESDAYs AND BYE TONYYYY." She yells from the phone and hangs up.

Ana takes her seat back next to me and I can tell she's back to herself now. She draws her energy from the people she loves. They can really put her back in a good mood.

"Karan Bhai, do you think you'll ever tell Rania?"

"I've been thinking about it. Tony and I are thinking about moving forward and settling down now that we're doing well with the business and we've been talking about starting a family so... some important conversations will need to happen with both of our families in the next few months." He says while holding Tony's hand.

"I guess I'm not the only one who's going to be bringing fireworks to the family this year." Ana laughs.

"Mission: Shock the family to Smithereens is in Full Effect." He winks at her.

"Just carry your mission out after my wedding if possible?" Aashu laughs.

"Don't worry babe, we're not going to let anything affect your... I was going to say big day but let's be real you're having a wedding week." Ana snickers.

I kiss her cheek and she looks back at me with a sweet smile.

...

It was still relatively early when we got back to the hotel room. Ana opted to take a quick shower alone. She was still a little withdrawn. By the time I got done with my own, she was on the balcony, curled on a chaise lounge just staring out on to the water.

"Ana baby... it's cold out here."

She slowly nods and gets up and comes back inside, taking her seat on the couch, resting her neck on the headrest and looking up to the ceiling instead.

I take my seat next to her and pick her hands and kiss them. "Tell me what's on your mind baby... you can tell me anything."

Please tell me.

She looks to me for a few moments. Tears form in her eyes. "It's not good."

Authors Note:So this was a look into Ana and Vishaal's relationship through Karan's eyes. Let's see what Ana has to reveal in the next chapter. I know you all hate me with the cliffies. HOW ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO MAKE SURE Y'ALL ARE PAYING ATTENTION? Hehehe. Love you all. Stay well!

Pinterest: www dot pinterest dot com/paleseptember10/50-shades-of-love-and-light/ Chapter 58-59 Miami Trip

Music:

Jee Dhoondta Hai – Ali Zafar – song Ana sings in the video that Karan shows Christian.

Fourth of July – Sufjan Stevens – song that Ana plays while lying on the grass.