Chapter 44: Give me hope

Hermione stared at the potions on her nightstand for a long while. Severus had made them for her. Even though Voldemort had ordered him to brew them, he had still taken his time and skill to make her feel better.

With a sigh, she pulled herself out of bed. By now it was almost time to go to sleep anyway. She would go to the bathroom and take a warm bath, to help take care of those cramps. Afterwards, she'd ask Hurry for a small dinner, before allowing herself to take that special potion, Severus had made for her after all.

sssssssss

"Hermione," a voice called her name pulling her back into awareness. Where was she? This wasn't Voldemort's house. In fact, this place almost looked like she was back at Hogwarts, in Severus' private quarters nonetheless. She looked around with wide eyes and really, there was her friend, sitting on his sofa looking at her with unreadable, black eyes. "I see you've taken the potion. Good. I wasn't sure if he'd give it to you."

She blinked at her friend in confusion. "Where am I? What have you done?" she asked, unable to hide the panic in her voice. "Merlin, this is some sort of trick, isn't it? He's using Occlumency or something to test me…"

Hermione looked around in panic, before trying to concentrate on her Occlumency shields. But it was like they had simply disappeared, leaving her exposed to whatever this… thing in front of her had planned. She backed away from him with her heart beating heavily in her chest. What kind of cruel joke was this?

"Hermione," the duplicate of Severus Snape called her again, while getting up from his spot on the sofa. She saw him slowly walking towards her, his hands lifted in a gesture of not being a threat to her. Hermione didn't believe it for a second and instead turned around, in the hope to reach the door in time. She did, only to find it closed for her. She whimpered.

How had Voldemort discovered her friendship with Severus? She hadn't told anyone about it.

"You can stop right there," she said staring at the copy with fire in her eyes. "How did you even think coming as Professor Snape would be a good idea? I hate that man and I told you he hates me too."

Hermione saw something flicker in the man's eyes before they were again the black orbs, she had gotten used to seeing on her friend. "This is no trick, he said. You're in my mind, Hermione. By taking the potion I brewed for you, I lowered your Occlumency shields and created a temporary link to my mind. It will only last a few hours, don't worry. It will not leave you exposed to his mental attacks, I promise." He looked at her calmly, obviously waiting for her reaction. She stared at him with small, distrustful eyes. Finally, she made a decision and said: "If you're really him, then you won't have problems answering this question for me: How did Severus Snape find out I went to the Ministry of Magic? Who told him?"

The black-haired man smiled at her. "No one. I received a written message through a house-elf called Dobby. He's a very stubborn little fellow, by the way, wouldn't leave until I had read that damned note." He snorted and for a moment Hermione stared at him with wide eyes. It was impossible that Voldemort had this bit information, right? Which meant that this man in front of her was…

"Severus," she whispered staring at him with wide eyes.

Her friend nodded, before slowly taking another step into her direction. "Hello," he said, a shy smile breaking out on his face. "Sorry for blindsiding you with that potion like this. It was my only way of contacting you right now."

She nodded understandingly, finally allowing herself a hesitant smile into his direction. "Hello," she whispered soaking the sight of him in with her eyes. "I can't believe you're here, talking to me."

Severus looked at her with a sad smile. "I should have talked to you weeks ago. Can you forgive me for being a stubborn idiot?"

Hermione couldn't hold her feelings in any longer. She threw herself in his arms with a sob and a laugh. "Only if you can forgive me for being an idiot, too. I should have listened to you. You were right. I was selfish and…"

He silenced her with a shake of his head but held her tightly to him. He had missed her so much, this was more than he had hoped for. "Hush. What's done is done. We've both been idiots. Let's just agree to do better from now on."

Hermione nodded against his shoulder and a moment later she felt his arms tighten around her. She relaxed against him with a sigh. "Absolutely. No more being idiots. I've learned my lesson the hard way. God, I miss you."

He nodded against her hair. "I'll get you out, I promise. Just hold on a little longer. Is there anything you could tell me that could help to get you out? Right now I don't even know where you are."

For a moment Hermione simply enjoyed her friends embrace, but then she reluctantly let go of him. She looked at him with a tired expression in her eyes. "I don't know where exactly I am either. There is a huge forest around the house and Voldemort told me, that it is full of werewolves that are guarding the house. I don't know if that's true though."

Severus nodded with a serious expression. "Alright. What else?"

"The wards will be a problem. He told me, that he's the only one able to get me through, as I don't have the Dark Mark. I don't think you'll be able to get me directly from the house," Hermione answered with a tired expression.

Her friend cursed. "Leave it to the Dark Lord to make things difficult," he said while starting to pace the floor in front of her.

She nodded. "There's something else. I… might have convinced him to let me take my exams at the ministry. I don't know where or when exactly, but maybe you could find out…"

Severus stared at her in disbelief. "You're preparing for your OWLs," he said tonelessly before starting to chuckle. "Of course you are. I don't even want to know how you convinced him to agree to that."

Hermione stared at the floor in shame. "You really don't. I… you were right. He is a manipulative bastard."

She had barely finished, as she felt his hand gently raise her chin, which forced her to look at him. For a moment she resisted meeting his eyes, before she gave in. His eyes were full of understanding. "Whatever it is Hermione, you know I won't judge you. I've done much worse, as you very well know."

She stared at him in silence, searching his eyes for confirmation of his words. Even though his pupils were huge, making his eyes seem almost totally black, they were not empty. Instead, they glowed with warmth and affection for her.

"You never held those things against me, Hermione," her friend continued. "Even though you would have had every right to be disgusted by me. You never were, you accepted who I am and what I have done. But this kind of trust goes in both directions, Hermione. Believe me, I know how it is to be stuck between a rock and a hard place."

Hermione smiled sadly. "Thank you. You don't know how much that means to me."

He nodded, before pulling her close again. "Believe me, I do."

This time their embrace lasted much longer than the first one. They simply stood there in silence, no more words needed between the two of them. Even though they hadn't been friends for that long, there was a deep understanding between them, that couldn't only be based on the link that still connected them, against all odds. They were like-minded souls thrown together by what only could be fate and Hermione was sure she'd forever be thankful to have met Severus and gained him as a friend.

"Alright, the Ministry then," he said, letting go of her a long while later. "I'll find a way to get you out of there. Don't worry if you don't hear from me again until then. Contacting you once more would be too risky."

Hermione nodded with a sad smile. "I know. Don't worry, I'll be fine. He's treating me well, for all that it's worth. And I even got my wand back, now."

"Good," he said looking at her with a serious expression now. "See that it stays that way. I know it's hard for you Gryffindors to reign your temper in, but you need to try. You don't need to pretend to agree with his ideas, you're not a Slytherin after all, but openly affronting him was a horrible idea."

Hermione nodded embarrassedly. "I know. I'm sorry. I do have a temper sometimes."

Severus snorted. "That happens to the best of us." With that he walked back to the sofa, sitting down on it with a sigh. Hermione followed him and sat down right at his side. "Alright, we should have a while longer, before the potion loses its effect. Is there anything else you want to tell me or want to know?"

She thought for a moment. "There is, indeed. Do you know who else is with me at the house? There's another man here, pale blond hair, grey eyes. I've only seen him twice, as he seems to avoid me or something. Is he a Death Eater?"

Her former potions professor looked at her with furrowed brows. "No. Only the Malfoys fit that description and you do know Lucius Malfoy. If it's not him, then it's probably not a Death Eater. I don't know much about the prisoners kept by the Dark Lord though. Usually, he doesn't have them for very long…"

Hermione sighed, as she understood what Severus implied. "Alright. Then maybe it's not someone important if you don't know anything about him. I'll just be careful then."

Severus nodded. "Yeah. Anything else you want to ask?"

She nodded. "What about my stuff? Is it still at my dorm? I'd hate when anybody went through it. My dorm mates can be quite nosy."

"Miss Brown and Miss Patil? Nosy? Wouldn't have guessed that," he said his eyes almost twinkling. "Don't worry. Everything was packed up right after your disappearance. Professor McGonagall saw to that. It there anything in particular you want me to get from it?"

She shook her head. "No, nothing. Thanks for offering. Is there anything you want to ask me?"

He looked at her with a smile. "There's indeed something. What's the name of your cat?"

"My cat?" Hermione asked her friend with confusion. "His name is Crookshanks. Why are you asking?"

The potions professor snorted. "The cheeky bugger moved in with me the night you disappeared but I wasn't sure what to call him. It wasn't like I could simply ask somebody after his name, without making myself suspicious."

Before Hermione knew it, she initiated the third hug of the evening by simply throwing herself at the poor man. "Thank you for taking him in. I know you don't like cats but I'm so relieved he's with you. Is he giving you much trouble?"

Severus chuckled. "Apart from covering me and my sofa in red hair, there's nothing I can complain about. I might change my opinion on those furry little fellows, eventually."

Hermione squeezed her friend even tighter, but suddenly he felt no longer solid in her arms. When she opened her eyes in confusion she saw, that the picture of him and his room started to fade more and more. He seemed to recognize it too, as he looked at her with a sad smile.

"The potion, it's losing effect," he explained.

"I don't want you to go," Hermione pleaded, but she knew that there was nothing he could do. He had already taken a big risk giving her that potion once. "Will I even remember that conversation? Or will it fade like a dream."

At that, he smiled. "Don't worry. It will still be there when you wake up in the morning. But don't forget hiding it behind your Occlumency shields. The Dark Lord must never know of our connection."

Hermione nodded towards him, even though he was barely even there any longer. "I promise," she said, trying to remember the look of her friend as well as she could. It would be everything that remained of him for her in the next weeks. "No more being idiots, remember?"

But he was gone. And so was she.

ssssssss

When Severus snapped back into reality, he found himself sitting on the sofa, in the meditative posture he had resumed a few hours ago, with a content smile on his face. Hermione was alright, she had even forgiven him and he had finally been able to tell her, that he had forgiven her too. It would have been perfect if his friend hadn't still been in the clutches of this maniac. But even for that, there was hope. Hermione would take her OWL-exams at the ministry. It was the best chance so far for getting her out. Unfortunately, the Dark Lord was no idiot, which meant that he must know that, too. Would he maybe even use the occasion to set a trap for the Order or the ministry itself? It was possible, which meant he had to be careful.

He sighed. No matter how little he liked the idea, he would have to talk to the Headmaster about it. Because when he wanted to get Hermione out, he needed some allies. And Dumbledore wasn't only a powerful and resourceful wizard. He was probably also as desperate to get Hermione out, as Severus himself.

ssssssss

When Hermione woke up in the morning, she felt as rested and the pain that had plagued her the last day was barely any longer to feel. Severus had been right. The memory of their conversation was still fresh in her mind. It felt like she had left his chambers just a minute ago, but of course, she had never really been there. Still, she was sure that it hadn't just been a dream. Severus had really spoken to her and most importantly forgiven her. Hermione felt like crying from relief and happiness.

Alright, she had to stay strong as long as it took him to get her out. But more importantly, she had to hide this memory deep down, where no one but her would be able to ever find it.