Chapter 60 - What's In A Name

The light was dimmed as Tony stepped into the living room of the penthouse. It made Rhodey's entrance almost blindingly bright as the door to the elevator opened up. He didn't lose a second, headed straight for Tony.

"What's going on?" His face was drenched in sweat. If Tony didn't know any better he might have made a joke about whether Rhodey had jogged to the Tower, but that would be so inappropriate on more than one level.

"Little late for a run, platypus."

"Cut the bullshit!" His fast steps echoed off the high walls of the penthouse. "What the fuck is going on?"

"It's fine." It was. It was fine, but then why were his hands still shaking? Hadn't stopped since that morning. "We're all good. It's just—"

"What happened? I tried to call. I tried to reach you for days, what... the press, they say... They say you—" He stopped himself just in front of Tony, eyes wide but lips suddenly shy. "They say you found him." His voice had dropped into a low rasp. "They... they say you have Aiden."

"I..." Tony swallowed hard, careful not to look away from his friend. "I do. I... I found him."

Rhodey was frozen only inches away him, his eyes wide. It was almost painful to watch how his face changed from disbelieve to confusion and then to something else. Something Tony knew all too well from every single time he looked at his boy himself. Every time he just thought of all these years they had failed to find him.

Guilt. Plain and simple.

Rhodey's lips worked soundlessly for a moment. There was a path to acceptance that Tony couldn't help him with. Acceptance, if you could call it that. The reality washing over him would take a lot longer than just this conversation to really sink in. Would need days, or maybe weeks. Hell, Tony hadn't come out at the other end of it himself after all.

"He... he's alive? He... you... you found him?"

"Yeah." Tony's own voice was just as breathless.

"But... when? How? Is he... where... where is he? Is he alright? Is—"

Tony put a hand on his arm, effectively stopping him. "He's... he's here. At the Tower. He... he's okay. I mean, bit... bit banged up, bit... bit shaken up. It's... it's been a long day." A long week really but he still had to be careful how much of the full picture he could let slip in front of Rhodey. This wasn't over yet.

Rhodey blinked a couple of times, his mouth still open in shock. "He's... he's alive. He's here."

Tony nodded, squeezing his friend's arm tightly. "Yeah. Yeah, he's alive."

"You...huh..." The corners of Rhodey's mouth twitched. "You found him." His lips pulled wider, into a smile and he let out a bark that almost startled Tony. "You found him!"

"I... yeah." Tony couldn't help it, he couldn't help but let the joy that suddenly filled Rhodey's face infect his own. "I guess I... I found him."

Before he had a chance to stall himself, Rhodey threw his arms around him and pulled him into a tight hug. "Oh my god, Tony. You found him. I... I can't believe you found him."

His knees were weak. There was nothing he wanted more than just tell Rhodey everything, put everything on the table and lean on him for help. It was selfish, disregarding the risk it would put Rhodey at with his superiors.

"You found him, you... you were right. All this time." Rhodey's voice was muffled by his shirt, but his words hit Tony with all their intensity nonetheless. "He was out there all this time and you... shit, Tony, only you could have pulled this off. Fuck. Shit, I... I'll never doubt that you're right again. Ever! Holy shit, Aiden's alive!"

The arms around him squeezed him tight, so tightly he couldn't speak. No, that was a lie. It wasn't Rhodey's hug that cut off his air and made it impossible for him to utter a single word. It was the lump in his throat. The lump that was growing and growing, had started as soon as Rhodey had pulled him in, when his eyes had started to sting. Tony was breathing through his mouth, fast breaths, shallow, even though he tried to make them deep and calm. He clung to his friend, grasping for some resemblance of composure but downright failing.

"Hey... hey, it's okay, Tones. It's... shit, man, it's okay."

He nodded into Rhodey's shoulder, trying to tell himself that it was. Trying to tell himself that it was a win, that the impossible had come true but he couldn't ignore the nagging voice in the back of his mind that reminded him that his kid had been out there all his time and that he had well and truly failed for years, that all his efforts had been inadequate, too little, just not enough. That after all, he hadn't found the boy. He had stumbled upon him. Sheer dumb luck, no finesse or skill whatsoever.

"Shhh, it's... you're okay. It's all good. He's safe now."

Tony pushed himself off his friend at that, rubbed the back of his hand across his eyes ignoring the concerned look on Rhodey's face. "I erm... we... we need to talk."

"What's wrong? You... you just said he's okay! Is he not? Is he— shit." Rhodey shook his head, the braces on his legs humming as he stepped from one leg to the other. "Of course he's not. How can he be. What... what do you need? What can I do?"

Tony's throat was so dry, it hurt when he tried to swallow the fat lump in his throat, sent a cold shiver down his spine. "I... I don't know how to ask you this, I—" He blew out a long breath.

"Tony, you can ask anything of me." Rhodey's eyes searched for his. "I'm here. What do you need?"

"It's... I..." He hated himself for how pathetic he sounded even to himself. This wouldn't do. It just wouldn't be good enough. "I want to tell you, but I don't know how without putting you in the line of fire. I—"

Rhodey grabbed his arm keeping him steady, almost as if he had to make sure that Tony wouldn't run off. "Who's fire?"

"Any of them. All of them."

"Tony..."

"Ross. Clarke. HYDRA, I—"

"HYDRA? Ross? What the—"

"Mostly... mostly Ross." He looked up at his friend at last and found his face as determined as ever. "Right... right now, I think, mostly Ross."

"Well, fuck Ross!" Rhodey's eyes wouldn't leave his face, determined to not let him get away with anything but the truth. "Tell me."

"Listen, if they court-martial you—"

His hands physically pulled Tony away from that thought, a little closer to his face. "If they were to court-martial me I'll add it to the list of things they will never hear a peep about, not from me. Tony, never from me."

"Rhodey—"

"I don't give a fuck about them."

Tony shook off his hand off his arm, his lips pursed. "Yes, you do." His feet wouldn't keep still any longer, his shaking knees pushing him to pace up and down just so he wouldn't crumble on the spot. "This is your life we're talking about. Your career. It would ruin—"

"I don't give a fuck about my career. Not as long as the whole system is subverted by crooks and self-serving lunatics. That's not what I joined for."

His voice was strong, full of conviction but he couldn't know what level of secrecy they were talking about.

"Tony, whatever you need. Whatever Addy needs, just fucking tell me!"

Not for a second did Tony doubt that Rhodey would put himself on the line for him, as well as for the kid and that was part of the problem. Not the problem, the... the danger. The risk. But Tony was quickly running out of other options besides relying on his friend, for Peter. For Aiden.

#

Peter's eyes were still heavy when the door to his room quietly clicked shut. His back turned, he didn't see who walked in but it had to be Mr. Stark for Miss Potts, Pepper, was lying next to him, one hand wrapped around his own, arm entangled with his, sleeping soundlessly.

"It's 3 am, buddy. You should be sleeping." His voice was low and soft.

Abandoning all pretense, Peter maneuvered his hand out of Pepper's grip and shuffled around until he faced the chair that the man had let himself fall back into. "You're up."

Mr. Stark shrugged. "Someone has to be."

Despite the wisecrack that he had anticipated, Peter huffed out a low breath. That was a mistake. It made his throat burn, which seemed to show on his face.

"Hey..." Mr. Stark's hand came to rest on the side of his face, a settling, grounding weight. "The meds have worn off completely, haven't they?"

"It's... it's fine."

"It's not fine when you're in pain, Pete."

Peter lowered his eyes, tried to look anywhere but the man in front of him wasn't having it.

"You don't have to put on a brave face, kid. Not with me, never with me, alright? I get that you don't like the side effects, that it must feel strange, but it's just for a few days, just till you're healed. You're safe here. You don't have to suffer through the pain."

"I'm... it's okay. I'm just... just a bit light-headed. And... and like you said, it's just for a few more days."

"Kid—"

"I don't want it!" He regretted raising his voice not just cause it stung in his throat but because Miss Potts was now stirring behind him. "I... I want to see my aunt. Please..."

Mr. Stark blew out a long breath and when Peter chanced a glance at the man, his eyes were not on him, but on the ground, unfocused.

"Please, Mr. Stark. Please, let me see her."

"It's not like I'm keeping you—" His mouth clapped shut and the man just shook his head. "How is that supposed to work right now, buddy? Do you want to go back to the hospital?"

"I... I don't know, I—"

"We can't circumvent the NYPD. They're still there."

"But... but you did. For me you did, I just—"

Mr. Stark bit his lip, not looking at him. "That was different. I'm not letting you anywhere near them. You don't want to be anywhere near them!"

"Please... please, I just... I need to see her. I need... I need to explain, to apologize, I—"

"Apologize for what exactly?"

The man's voice rang sharp. Peter could feel his eyes on him now, unblinking, but couldn't find the nerve to meet them. It was impossible to explain, not to anyone, least of all to Mr. Stark.

"Kid, look at me."

His eyes closed, he wished for his heart rate to slow down, for the bright dots dancing in front of his eyes to go away, but they just wouldn't. Reluctantly, he braced himself and looked up at the man in front of him.

"You didn't do anything wrong." There was a tremor in Mr. Stark's voice, fighting for control. "None of this is on you, not in any way."

Deep breaths, Peter looked away. "I don't want to fight with you."

Mr. Stark's face melted into a soft frown. "I know, buddy."

"She's... she's all alone, I... please... please, Mr. Stark..."

The man cleared his throat, his voice just a soft rumble. "When you're healed. We'll think of something when you're healed. Or... well, little after you're healed, I mean, I guess we could still keep the bandages on or there might be suspicions. We should really, just to be sure."

That wasn't good enough. A spark of hope, but not good enough. "Please, will you help her? I know you can. You're the only who that can."

"Hey... Pete, look at me." Mr. Stark waited until Peter finally looked up at him. "I will. I promise that I will. I promise I will always do everything I can so you're safe and happy. Everything."

Safe and happy. He couldn't hold the man's stare, had to look away. Safe and happy. He knew what that was code for. A promise to sacrifice everything if it meant keeping him safe. Mr. Stark had already proven his determination when it came to that after all. That was what his whole thing about leaving had been about. Safety. Or whatever illusion of safety he could conjure up. Peter's lips were pressed together tightly, desperate not to let that sob escape that was growing in his throat. Not just for the vanity of it either. It would hurt and he was so over that. He just wanted to feel normal again.

"I'll call for Helen." Mr. Stark's eyes were still searching his face, still studying him. "That okay?"

"It's..." He tried to breathe through the stinging pain in his upper body, only elevated by his desperation, this bottomless feeling of uselessness, that somehow brought out the low throbbing in his arm as well. That threatened to just intensify with every waking minute. "You just said it's... it's 3 am."

The man didn't bat an eye. "Your point?"

Peter didn't really have a point, other than that the Doctor Cho was probably sleeping and waking her, waiting till she got there just cause he was in a little... in some pain... But Mr. Stark knew all that. He knew and he didn't care and there was something about his brazen disregard of everyone else just so Peter would feel less... well, just feel less really, that was... that was foreboding for what he would do about helping May. What he wouldn't do, as soon as it would even seem to affect Peter. His safety.

Mr. Stark's eyebrows twitched a bit closer together. "You okay with her giving you another dose of the pain meds, buddy?"

Peter couldn't deny that it would make him feel better. He could do that. Just one more dose till he felt better. A deep breath, then Peter nodded. "Yeah..." His voice was rough, he could feel it as much as hear it.

A short nod in response, the weight of Mr. Stark's hand ghosting over his shoulder. "FRI?"

She didn't respond, but the ceiling light pulsed a bit brighter for just a moment and with that Mr. Stark pulled the chair a little closer. His hand settled on Peter's, the pressure not too strong but constant. To Peter's surprise, it took only a few minutes for Doctor Cho to quietly push the door open and advance towards them. The lights raised just enough for her to find her footing, she checked in with him. She didn't touch the bandages but checked some reflexes on his arm.

"Progress on your arm is good. Really good." She lightly pinched the skin on the back of his hand, then frowned as his skin took its time to flatten out again. "You need to drink more. You're healing fast but it's draining you."

Mr. Stark rose out of his chair at that, his hand came to rest on Peter's head. "He said he felt light-headed."

"I'm... I'm okay."

"Shhh, you will be, buddy." The man's hand softly ran through his hair.

Helen Cho nodded, then crouched down to be on Peter's eye level. "You might be healing fast and that is great news, but you remember what I told you about the cradle? How it takes a lot of energy out of your body to heal up those wounds?"

Peter's eyes flicker over to Mr. Stark then back to her and he gave a small nod.

"Even if you heal fast, the energy your body needs remains the same, might even increase due to the speed your body works at. Only, it needs to come up with that energy in just a few days when it would take someone without your healing factor a few weeks to recover. It's why you feel so weak. You were still recovering from the... the injuries you sustained from the—" She bit her lip, but didn't look away. "From the men that took you." Her eyes were searching his face for a reaction but he just pushed the images from that warehouse, the basement room away that were still lurking in his sub-conscience. No need for those demons, Peter had plenty to obsess about from what had happened less than a day ago. "You need rest and you need sustenance."

The mattress moved behind him. "I can... I can get some more things. I... damn it, I should have thought of that, something more than just soup, I—"

Doctor Cho looked over at Miss Potts instead now. "You are doing your best, Pepper, and that's all anyone can ask right now. We're all figuring out the basic parameter for how to best help your boy as we go along."

Peter ducked his head into the pillow, painfully aware how many people were kept awake and busy because of him.

"Hey..." Doctor Cho blew out a long breath, then reached for his lower arm to get his attention. "You're okay. You will be okay, we're just trying to make you as comfortable as we can, okay? How is your appetite? Do you want to eat?"

The thought of anything solid going down his throat made Peter want to retch. Doctor Cho tapped the back of his wrist, slowly nodding when he looked up.

"That's okay. We'll put in an IV. Right here. That way you can rest and don't need to worry about any of that." The doctor then turned to Mr. Stark instead. "We'll keep it peripheral. I think with a drip during the rest of the night his appetite might even be back by morning."

Peter's gaze had shifted along with the Doctor's and he found the man's eyes still steady on him. "You alright, buddy?"

He wasn't deluded enough to think that Mr. Stark was asking for his permission, well aware that his medical treatment didn't depend on his own consent, but on his guardian's. The man's hand was still in his hair, running through it back and forth across Peter's skull. "Those aren't too bad. I had one of those just last month. Beats a feeding tube being stuck down your throat I can tell you that. Those things are just wretched not just when they go in but—"

"Tony!" Pepper's voice sounded far from amused but Peter couldn't help but feel a little better at the man's familiar babble.

Mr. Stark winked at him in his signature fashion. "Alright then. You'll feel better in no time, buddy."

As Doctor Cho pulled out the syringe, Peter had to remind himself of what Mr. Stark had said before. Of his promise to keep him safe but it didn't help much with the trembling of his arm as the doctor pressed the needle into his skin till it pierced it and went straight into his vein. Mr. Stark held his hand through all of it, unwavering in his focus. Just the same, Peter could sense Pepper right behind him, one hand slowly, gently rubbing up and down between his shoulder blades. It seemed to be all that, their care, their attentiveness and warmth that made him settle down, much more than Doctor Cho's drugs. He didn't even feel the canola being fitter to the back of his right hand as the chilly wave traveled through his veins, clouding all the pain. His eyes all of a sudden too heavy to pry open for much longer, he gave in and slipped into a peaceful sleep.

There was no telling how long he slept. When he woke up, the room had a distinctly different feel to it. He didn't even have to open his eyes to tell. The space in the bed next to him was empty, no warmth radiating from Miss Potts any longer, but the chair next to his bed wasn't empty. It made his heart skip a beat though, when realization hit that it wasn't Mr. Stark who was occupying the chair.

His mind was flushed with scenarios of everything that could have happened while he had been dead to the world in his dreamless slumber. But Mr. Stark wouldn't let anything like that happen, would he? No, Peter was sure that before anyone could get to them in the Tower, the man would have suited up, flying them out of the country to some lonely island in the Caribbean that he undoubtedly owned.

Ready to face whatever would await him on this new day, Peter's eyes fluttered open, but he sure hadn't been as prepared as he had thought.

"Good morning."

It took him a moment, a couple of deep breaths to respond. "He—hello."

Even if it hadn't been for the braces he had seen Mr. Stark design, hell, the braces he had helped him to work on, the man in the chair next to his bed was unmistakable Colonel James Rhodes.

The door flew open faster than Peter could arrange his thoughts and Pepper Potts rushed into the room, eyes only on him, like the Avenger in his room was a totally normal occurrence.

"Good morning, darling." Her hand brushed the hair out of his face and there was undeniable heat rising to his cheeks from the easy affection she displayed in front of the Colonel. Peter shot a quick look at the man in the chair next to his bed. There was a bit of a scowl flickering across his face. The buzzing of Miss Potts' watch brought Peter's focus back to her but she - Pepper - she didn't seem to even notice the vibrations on her wrist. "Did you sleep okay? Anything you need?"

"I was literally right here." Rhodes spoke loud enough for both of them to hear but his voice clearly swung with an annoyed connotation, like he was being ignored by both of them.

Pepper only shook her head, oblivious to the man's comment, her eyes never leaving Peter's face. "How are you feeling, darling? Any pain? Hungry maybe?"

"I'm... I'm fine." And he was, actually. He felt quite well, no queasy stomach, no bright spots dancing in front of his eyes. A quick glance to his hand confirmed that the nutrient drip was still firmly lodged under his skin.

"Yeah? No pain? Helen's just downstairs, I can—"

"Really, I'm fine."

"I didn't leave, you know." Rhodes leaning forward trying to catch Pepper's eye. "Didn't move once. I mean, what do you think was gonna happen?"

She waved a hand in his general direction. "No food then? You sure? Something to drink? Some tea? FRIDAY, tea!"

"I... Pepper, I promise I really feel okay."

She froze for only a split second, then pulled her lips into a smile while her hand silenced the vibration that still radiated from her watch in fairly regular intervals.

"This is Aruba all over again! I had everything totally under control."

She turned sharply, her long hair whipping around with her. "Don't you bring up Aruba to me! Like I would forget Aruba! It's not for any lack of trying either I can tell you that!"

If Peter hadn't been lost in what was going on before, he certainly was now. It was like they had their own private code, designed to keep everyone else in the dark.

The corners of Rhodes' mouth were pulled down, his arms crossed in front of himself as he looked up at her, not amused.

Pepper just sighed, her shoulders pulled up high as she sucked in the breath then falling almost like she was in the middle of a breathing exercise. "Don't look at me like that, I told him that he should call you."

Peter's eyes flickered back and forth between them. His pulse was fluttering a little faster than before. It seemed obvious that Colonel Rhodes knew something, but... how much?

"Easy for you to say when he did call you."

The Colonel's voice was low and for a short moment, Peter thought that maybe they hadn't told their friend about the whole Spider-Man angle. That maybe he didn't know about the enhanced senses, Peter's heightened hearing, all that. But when he saw the look on Miss Potts' face it was clear that the man hadn't spoken low enough. That she had heard him just fine as well and that the drop of his voice was more for show than any real attempt to hide his words.

She blinked a couple of times, avoiding Peter's eyes. "Just... can we not do this right now?" She pulled in a deep breath and slowly blew it out, probably to calm herself, but it came out all shaky. Nevertheless, she looked up at Peter, the smile on her lips that surely was meant to be encouraging was a little too crooked, clearly stained with uncertainty. "You need to get your strength back, darling. You know what Helen said. You just let me know whenever you feel ready, okay? Some food, anything you fancy, okay? Anything."

Once more it almost overwhelmed him how genuine her affection rang. He found himself leaning into her touch, as her hand ran through his hair, calming movements, a vibe that just felt like home. Just like it had that morning he had woken in the Compound's med wing. When she had been there by his side, crying but radiating nothing but warmth and comfort. He didn't know Rhodes, didn't know much about their relationship, only that they were supposed to be friends. Only what he had overheard cowering on the ceiling of Mr. Stark's room in the med wing. Where was Rhodes coming off talking to her like that? Like Mr. Stark's secrecy was her fault?

"He didn't even call her."

The words were out of his mouth before he could stop himself and just when Pepper's face went slack, her eyes growing round and wide did he realize that maybe, maybe he should have just kept his mouth shut. The silence in the room was heavy, stretching into an uncomfortably long pause.

"Wait..." The Colonel shook his head. "Wait, what did you just say?"

"It doesn't matter." Her eyes were still on Peter's face, her voice strained. Then she cleared her throat. Her hand didn't pull back from Peter, she just turned her head a bit more towards the Colonel, her tone a lot more even than before. "It doesn't matter right now, okay? I know. You know. It doesn't—"

"He didn't tell you? He didn't tell you?"

Her gaze was glued to Peter's bed sheet and Peter just couldn't help himself. "It was the Widow."

"Nat?" The man's face was blank, momentarily speechless.

Pepper's other hand found Peter's lower arm and squeezed him lightly.

"It's... it's what happened. The Widow told me it was her who made the call. It's not your fault that Mr. Stark—"

"Shh, it... it's okay." Her eyes blinked shut for just a moment. "He was still figuring things out. It was... it was just Tony working through what... what didn't seem possible."

Rhodes got out of his chair. "He should have told you! I can't... I can't believe he wouldn't—"

She shook her head and pushed herself upright, facing the Colonel only the hand in Peter's hair remaining. "He didn't keep anything from me. He was overwhelmed with what was happening which is why Natasha called me in the first place. He's doing the best he can. You know why he didn't want to tell you. Don't tell me I have to explain Tony to you."

The man huffed out a shallow breath. "No, of course. I know... I know."

She turned back to Peter, kneeled down next to his bed so she was on his eye level. "I know we're supposed to at least pretend like we have it all figured out and we're trying. I promise you, darling, we're trying to do the best we can. I know none of this is easy and I know... I know it's a lot for you. It's not easy for any of us either. But we're trying, okay? Tony is trying to make things right for you. We talked about this, remember?"

Peter nodded and again, those vibrations on her wrist pulled him out of his thoughts.

"Seriously, Pep. Just go and take care of that," the Colonel gestured in her general direction. "We'll be good."

Her eyes were narrowed on her watch before she slightly turned towards the Colonel. They stared at each other for just a moment before she bent down to Peter, her face soft.

"I'm just down the hall, okay?" She pressed her lips onto Peter's hair, held him close for a moment. "If you need anything—"

"If he needs anything I'm right here." Rhodes head dipped to the side a bit. "Just like I have been all morning."

Peter bit the inside of his cheek but nodded. "It's fine. I... I'm fine."

She squeezed his arm again, doubt still distinctly radiating off her. There was no denying that Peter's stomach turned a little when she got up and headed for the door. He wasn't scared, nothing like that. What was the worst that could happen? Colonel Rhodes was one of Mr. Stark's best friends, he knew that. He had seen them together in Germany, their camaraderie. Mr. Stark had talked about the man more than once. What should happen? If only Peter's definition of safety and of what he could trust to happen hadn't been turned on its head completely in just about a week.

He had just walked to the Tower like he had done again and again for months on end. What could go wrong? He was just having breakfast with his aunt, what was the worst that could happen?

He was being silly. Nothing would happen to him at the Tower. He peaked up at the Colonel as the door fell shut behind Miss Potts. The man was studying him, looking him up and down, but even with the weird mood between the two grown-ups, there was no threat there, no animosity. Even with Peter's senses still a bit numb from the meds, he could tell that much.

"Well, okay then..." Rhodes clasped his own hands and awkwardly stepped from one foot to the other, the braces whirring along with his movement. "So, you know, if you like... want anything. Food. A drink. I mean, not a drink, just... just something to drink, I..." He cleared his throat. "I mean, I'm here."

"O—Okay, yeah. I... erm... thanks." Peter didn't look at him, his eyes on the back of his hand where the IV was still firmly attached to him. He didn't even know if he needed to eat, or should eat. He wasn't particularly hungry anyway.

"Hey, listen, I—" The man stopped himself, lips pressed tightly onto each other as he studied him, then blew out a sigh and sat back down. "Okay, this is super awkward. I don't even really know what to call you."

Peter blinked a couple of times, then shot a glance in his direction, trying to follow. "To... to call me?"

"Yeah, there seem to be a few options floating around."

"I... I don't know, I... I really don't mind, it's not..." He looked away, down to his hands. He had no answer for that. How would he know what to pick? His name - or rather what he thought his name was, had apparently belonged to someone else before him - or the other name that had been his so many years ago. But that wasn't him either, was it? A distant memory kept alive with nothing more than some home videos.

Colonel Rhodes cleared his throat. "It's just that I don't think that Pepper's 'darling' cop-out is going to work all that well for me."

That made Peter look up. He hadn't really thought of that, but it made so much sense. Miss Potts hardly ever used his name, neither did Mr. Stark. Not to his face anyway. Though he did know what they called him when they thought he couldn't hear.

"You know, it's fine by me if you want to stick with Peter. Nobody is going to—"

"No." He shook his head, voice stronger than he thought himself capable. He couldn't, that name wasn't his to take. It felt wrong and dirty after he had stolen so much from that other boy already.

"Okay, that... that's okay." The colonel leaned in a bit more, just stopped himself from reaching out it seemed. "How about... shit, I mean, shoot." The man closed his eyes in resigned frustration. "Just... something that makes you feel good? That feels comfortable?"

Peter kept biting the same spot on his lip and it really started to sting. How pathetic was this? He had lost everything, didn't even know what his name was anymore. Well, legally it seemed quite clear, but, no. Just, no!

"You— It's fine if you don't know right now, that's okay." The man's voice turned soft, so full of understanding, he still wasn't used to that level of attention by someone like the colonel. "How about... how about we start with me?"

Peter frowned and shot a glance over at the man. "With... with you?"

"Yeah, I mean, Tony and Pepper, I mean, I guess you know that, right? Maybe?" He shrugged. "Well, they call me Rhodey and you can call me that if you want. Or... or James or..." He stopped, his eyes a little unfocused

Peter couldn't help but wonder what the man was thinking about, maybe about what Aiden used to call him. He wrecked his brain to remember any interactions from the videos he had seen but nothing came to mind. He had been in them alright, but it had been Mr. Stark and also Pepper that Peter had focused on when watching those videos. That family unit that seemed to tight-knit even though he knew now that things had been a little more complicated than that.

Truly, that seemed to be the overlying theme of everything he encountered in his life, past as well as present. Complications, secrets, things that were different than they had seemed. All those secrets. Their reluctance to give any of them up.

"What happened on Aruba?" He only glanced at the man from underneath his lashes, not sure if he was going too far.

The colonel huffed out a low grunt and waved off the question. "Nothing. That's the point. Nothing happened, just..." He sighed, then fell silent, lost in his thoughts for a few moments. "I guess, looking back, well..." He shrugged, then looked up at Peter. "It's ancient history. They thought you were gone but you were with me. It's... nothing happened."

Silence fell between them once more, both of them lost in their thoughts. Peter wondered if that awkwardness would ever really go away. If there would come a time when he would feel like none of the strangeness of all this, of how he spoke to them, what he called them. A time when all these things would seem so trivial and just natural. He couldn't even really remember how that had happened between him and Mr. Stark. How long and often he had seen the man until things just seemed comfortable enough that he could forget about the fame and all that.

"Mr... Mr. Stark, he... he calls me Pete. Not... not always, he uses a lot of different, he—" Peter stopped himself.

The Colonel was quiet for a moment, then swallowed hard. "Yeah, he's quite creative in that department, isn't he."

It felt redundant to nod in agreement, so Peter didn't, still a little lost in his own thoughts.

"Hey, Pete..."

His eyes shot up at the man next to him, lip still painfully caught between his teeth.

"Well, seems to work, hm?"

He couldn't help but shyly grin at that, nodded. Yeah, it did. It kind of brought him back to those days in the lab when it had just been him and Mr. Stark, some crime-fighting on the side but none of all this complicated drama. Back when the only thing he really had to worry about was not letting slip how many hours he really was spending at the Tower with his mentor. Mr. Stark...

"Where... where is he? Mr. Stark, he... he said he wasn't going to leave, but..." Peter swallowed hard, but he had.

He wasn't there, not in the penthouse at least. He was almost entirely sure that if the man had been in the Tower when he woke up, he'd have rushed to the room, just like Miss Pepper had. Peter hadn't heard him around the penthouse, not like Pepper as she had walked around before settling in the office at the end of the hallway. It was always possible that the medication was messing with his senses but it felt like something was missing. Peter was sure that he would have known if Mr. Stark had been around. There was a small possibility that the man was on the level below them, working in the lab. Researching. The walls of the lab were too thick for Peter to tell, but no. He'd be there by now, he was sure.

"Tony had a couple of errands to run."

"Errands?" Peter's heart skipped a beat. "Did he... did he go..." Please. Hope, he could practically touch it. "Did he go to the hospital?"

The colonel's face was passive, almost calculating. "Among other things."

"He went to see May?"

"Yes." The man's expression showed clear discomfort with the idea, but Peter couldn't care less. Mr. Stark had gone to see May, just like he had asked. That had to be why he was there, right? He went to help her. He just had to have gone to help her.

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[author's note: guys, I have been so sloppy responding to your awesome reactions and comments, but I promise, I'll catch up... at some point ;) I hope you do know that I absolutely get a kick out of every freak-out and theory and praise you leave. Thank you so much for that! :)

Next chapter will be up in the next couple of days I think.]