ART OF THE DARK - PART 32
Not waiting around to see any more of Todd's parlor tricks, Dean slips backward into the house, slamming the door shut and bolting it. He races back to the kitchen where Brendan sits alone in his seat on the table. Dean looks down the hall and sees Téa outside at the back of the house. She's leaning into the backseat of the car.
So he goes to grab Brendan's seat, but notices he's not buckled in. Shit...he thinks, knowing that if he picks up the seat and runs with it, the baby will slip right out. With no time for thought, he just acts, snatching Brendan out of the seat and carrying him in one arm. Then he grasps the seat handle and sprints down the hall with it, kicking the back door open.
Téa looks up, just in time to see Dean toss the seat towards her. It tumbles and skitters down the steps, landing at her feet. She grabs it and starts tying it down to the backseat, next to Evan, who's just been secured. She works with shaking hands, trying to divide her attention between Evan, Dean...and the space around her.
Her heart is breaking, more than she ever thought possible, because even though she'd taken RJ at his word that Todd had sunk to unbelievable depths, to see it in the flesh is something entirely different.
From her hiding spot around the corner of the house, Roseanne watches it all with a smile. She feels Téa's panic, smells it in the air-and can feel Todd moving through the space on the opposite side of the house, heading around to the back, disrupting the air with rage that's consuming him. She is high as a kite as she watches him clear the corner and see the car.
It's all she can do to not whoop aloud at the impending confrontation.
When he spots them, Todd breaks into a heated run just as Dean gets down the steps. Ready for him, though, Dean reaches around into his belt…
...and in the time it takes Todd to reach him-in the second it takes Téa to see what's happening-Dean has the gun up and pointed right at Todd's face...his other arm holding Brendan securely to his chest.
Todd slams to a stop, his entire body jerking with the force of it, baring his teeth in a wild grin. He grunts noisily at being stopped this way, snarling, "Y'now, EVERY time I see you, man, you're pointing a gun at me. What're you so goddamn afraid of?"
"Oh, this isn't fear, believe me," Dean replies, unruffled.
Roseanne nearly squeals with delight, so attuned to every thought and feeling, so hyper-aware of everything, that she's about to burst. She jumps up and down, like the happiest little girl in the world...then plasters herself up against the wall, taking in a huge breath, letting the rain streak down her face. She laughs manically because it all feels so good, so gratifying. Then, with another cleansing breath, she peeks out again, hunching low as she starts to make her way over.
"That right?" Todd snaps, mocking Dean. "You got no fear, mister tough guy, mister warrior…?"
Dean held the gun fast, still pointing it at Todd, unmoving in his grip.
"Awww come on, Shelton! You don't gotta put a show on for me. Even the strongest men… are afraid every now and again. So come on, let's see some fear, let's see the real you! Come on, boy, come on come on, lemme see it."
Todd urges Dean to act, moving his fingers in a bring-it-on motion, begging for the fight. Dean just stares him down, unruffled and still as a statue. He is utterly unmoved and unwilling to act. With a slight shake of his head, he says, "Keep your distance."
Todd focuses on Brendan a second before growling, "Ohhh, ain't YOU the big man with MY kid in your hands. Got it ALL, dontcha? Don't need to hold the kid ransom for the bucks anymore when you can just take the whole fuckin' FAMILY! Ain't that RIGHT?!"
Téa jumps at the sound of Todd's voice, eyes on Evan sitting in his seat, looking right back at her. She touches him like she's making sure he's still there. Then she slowly exits the car, standing up, staring at Todd from behind Dean…
The irony and insanity of the moment is not lost on her...or Todd. It's tragic… crazy… impossible...but still, it's happening. Téa just stares at Todd...as if trying to remember him. It's so hard.
Shockingly, Todd looks directly at her and he glares at her, lips stretching into this cool smile. There's a flicker there in his eyes, a flicker of a man she once knew. Téa sees it.
In another time and place, his smile would be full of warmth and joy and they'd touch foreheads and kiss.
I've missed you. I'm not the same without you. The universe isn't the same.
She wants to tell Dean to put the gun away, but… just as the inner voice said… things aren't the same anymore. She knows Dean shouldn't disarm. Up close, Todd looks worse than even moments before, worse than she's ever seen him… wet strands of blackish hair streak his hardened face, his eyes are bright and lit up with madness, and he's taken on an ashy, grayish pallor...making him look like death… well, death.
It's beyond lost humanity, lost humanness.
He IS Death, the Grim Reaper. And he's come a'calling.
She clears the wet hair from her own face, saying the only words that come to mind:
"Where's RJ?"
These are the first words he's heard from her in so long, and they fly through the air, hitting Todd lightly, even softer than the rain. He mimics her, clearing the wet hair from his face. God, he thinks, how nice her voice sounds. It could do something to his soul. It could. He licks his lips, the rain flavoring them with a calming wetness.
"RJ? Left him behind," he says, truthfully.
His voice, conversely, sounds guilty to her right from the first...it sounds...bad. She shakes her head, tearful fury rising up from her belly at the thought of RJ, her dearest friend, lying somewhere dead, tossed out like trash. She's so SURE of it.
"Where?! What did you DO TO HIM?!"
Her vociferous response surprises him and he takes a step bank and creases his face in curious wonder. There's an odd innocence in his eyes, the kind a psychotic child would wear.
"What did I DO to him?"
He completely disregards Dean with his query, ignoring the pointed gun and his squirming son in Dean's arms. Comprehension then falls over Todd's face, the warped innocence dropping, and he starts to laugh thickly, darkly.
"Oh oh, I get it now. You think I KILLED him."
All pretense of husband-to-wife, soulmate-to-soulmate respect is loudly and painfully absent now, the seconds seeming to last a lifetime. Téa nods, about to speak her answer, one that, to her, is truly a death-knell for whatever possibly could have been saved of Todd.
"Yeah, I do. I think you and Roseanne killed him. So where is he, where'd you leave him?"
The panic intensifies at Todd's dead, disdainful silence.
"WHERE IS HE?!"
Roseanne's ears perk up at her name being mentioned, finally. She's at the front of the car now, hiding behind the hood to stay out of sight. She didn't even have to hunch down to get there, everyone else being so wrapped up in each other that they didn't even notice her. She listens closely, with a permanent clownish grin.
Todd shakes his head at her and Téa can see he's trembling, the reason for it she doesn't know exactly...rage...fear? His stare is unmoving, horrifically disbelieving, and it's then that Téa understands he has no awareness of his own monstrous demeanor.
"You really think I would do that?"
At that moment, Dean tips his head back, short on patience, not getting why Téa insists on banging her head against this particular brick wall of insanity. The best thing would be to fuckin' shoot the crazy bastard.
Like clockwork, Todd snaps eyes on Dean, pointing at him. "Hold on there, Sheriff. I'm talkin' to MY WIFE."
"Yeah...and she thinks you're a murderer," Dean replies in stride, though he's reeling from what he swears is Todd's bizarre mind-reading ability.
"Mmm," Todd murmurs, looks back at her. "And why is that, Delgado? Tell me why on God's green earth, you would you think that?"
Téa fumes at his actual taunting of her. "What the hell kind of question is THAT? I think you'd do ANYTHING if it served your purpose right now. If it would feed your NEEDS. I mean, LOOK AT YOU!"
Todd looks down at himself, swiping his hands down his coat. "Wow," he says, dripping with sarcasm, "you're right. Look at me. Look at the sick bastard. Yeah, alright, I killed him. Chopped him up into little bitty pieces and left him all over the M1. That SATISFYING enough for ya? That WORK for ya?"
He spits the last words, unable to stop his reflexive defenses, unwilling to.
Téa stares into him for a second, a cold, deliberate pause before answering.
"Was that supposed to be FUNNY?"
"Naah… that was just ME, Téa." He starts to move closer to her, keeping his eyes on hers, putting a sly grin on. "You caught me. You guessed it. I absolutely killed that motherfucker. Blew his head off with his own piece, drank his blood, and left him for the vultures 'cause I just love supportin' them endangered creaturesof GOD."
"I think one of us needs to leave. NOW."
Todd shakes his head. "No way, WIFE. I ain't goin' anywhere." He takes another step. Dean moves up then, advancing on Todd...using the gun to try to push him back.
"Don't even think about it."
Todd glances all over the place, smirking. Everything is surreal to him, fake, pretend. He cannot believe this SHIT.
Things ain't goin' the way they're supposed to. And why is that, Mr. Manning?
He waves a hand in front of his face, drops his head, then claps eyes on Dean's once more. He tilts his head like a dog, every word a bark with bite.
"And you are… WHO? Who are you, Shelton? Who are YOU to tell ME what to do or not to do? Isn't it MY CHOICE? MY decision? Who the FUCK are YOU?!"
"Either YOU go...or *I* do," Téa says in a pained and angry voice, not letting Dean get in a retort. And her sentiment shakes Todd up even more than he already is. She doesn't care though, she wants this done, wants everything to just stop and it's now she says to herself…
I am so very afraid of you, of what you are.
Todd swings back to her. "Don't you even care what I have to say? Don't you even give the smallest goddamn about MY SIDE of this? You're just gonna get in a car with this ASSHOLE and drive off with MY FUCKING CHILDREN? IS THAT IT?"
His ferocious yell rips through the air and Téa reels back at it...but just a tad because she's trying like hell to hold her ground.
"There's no SIDE anymore, Todd! I SEE who you are. My god."
Still behind the hood of the car, Roseanne giggles before she can stop herself. She slaps a hand over her mouth as she peeks out to see if anyone heard her but they haven't. She raises her head up over the hood to get a different view… and spots Evan in the backseat… sitting like an innocent little fawn in the woods, just waiting to be picked off by a hunter's rifle. She smiles, big and wide...at how well she's called it...at how perfectly her plans have worked, and she slowly starts to make her way around the car.
"Oh, that's so CONVENIENT, Delgado. Soooo easy."
Téa swallows hard, looking at him peering out at her from behind that ashen hair, hearing him growl at her. If she wasn't so petrified, she'd cry.
"Well, what else do you want me to say? You made your choice." She looks at Brendan in Dean's arms, still as a bird in a nest. Waiting, waiting.
"I made my choice," Todd murmurs, and for a split second, he remembers he was going to let her go peacefully but then that recall disappears and he thinks about rushing Téa, knowing it'll get him a bullet. Knowing it just as if a movie plays out in front of him. He listens and watches Téa make a move for the car, to get in.
His voice stops her and he's gazing at her, saying, "YOU were the one who left ME, no note, no phone call. YOU made the choice for BOTH of us without even giving me a chance to explain myself. Yeah, I made mistakes but you OWED me that much. Dontcha think?"
It's the most rational Téa had seen of Todd and she stops to consider him except the moment skips away from her when Evan peeps from inside the car.
She spits her words, "Oh, is THAT what I should have done, let you explain? Explain what you did to Starr then move on and let you explain how you thought it'd be a good idea to get Roseanne out of jail and THEN let you explain how you thought it'd be a good idea to start fucking her while you were at it? I mean, what IS there to explain? You'll take any opportunity to give into that side of you, Todd...that side of you that has no morals, no limits...no love for ANYTHING but your own rage and your own self-hatred. There's no place for me there… OR your children. So why should we stay? what's the POINT?!"
Somewhere, sometime, maybe all this would have made sense, maybe, maybe it could have led somewhere, but the sky is opening up and Todd can hear hell's belches gurgling above him and it's going to come down, hell raining on all of them, making them run, run like ants running from poison…
Oh now, listen to HER. She got real NERVE to sling that shit at me now. NOW!
"Aww you're one to talk, Delgado. I mean...you're standing here, hiding behind the fuckin' shitbag who makes a LIVING kidnapping women and kids. Like Starr...LIKE YOU! You wanna explain that to ME? You wanna explain to ME how you got to the point where you could rationalize fucking HIM like some kinda cheap WHORE?! What's wrong with YOU, HUH? Look at YOU!"
Dean takes a step forward, suddenly interjecting. "Okay, you don't talk to her like that, got it?
Todd's eyes swing over to him at the intrusion, giving him a threatening stare and Dean has to admit it's scary as hell because there's no telling what he'll do, but he keeps his cool.
"Hey cowboy," Todd says right back in a suddenly smooth, slick tone. "YOU don't talk to ME, got it? This ain't none a'your fuckin' business, Shelton, so stay out of it and know… KNOW… that the only reason you're still breathing is 'cause you're holding MY son, MY son, motherfucker."
Téa moves back towards Dean and puts a hand on his shoulder to ease him back.
Todd sees it, clear and painfully sharp, and instinctively grins nasty for a second or two.
"It's alright," she says, "we're leaving. There's no point to this. Let's just go."
"There IS a point," Todd snaps. "The point is… that I love you."
Téa lets out a sad hard laugh, not having any idea at this point if it's truthful or a trick suddenly pulled from a hat. She wipes the rain off of her face again. Then she looks back at him.
"You know what's so funny, is that I know that. I KNOW you love me and I love you, too… but look where all that love has gotten us. I can't do this, Todd. Not now. When it was just me...that was one thing. I could take chances...I could risk it. But not anymore." She shakes her head. "Nope, not after what you did to Starr, and certainly not now, when I see how much WORSE it could be for my sons."
"Our sons, you mean, OUR sons. Hear that?! Those are MY children, too!" He groans and closes his eyes for a moment, trying to manage his whole self, and then looks at her once more, saying softly, "Don't you do this, Delgado… don't you take them from me."
Except that softness wasn't gentle. No, the lower his voice gets, the more menacing it is...because he can see Blair and hear her, and he can feel the pain of watching a child of his slip away, being taken from him, hidden from him. Used against him. He tries to see through the fog, tries to keep his feet on the ground, tries to keep standing on those two feet. Her voice had kept him here, but it's not lasting.
He puts on a desperate cover now, panting, "You KNOW Roseanne was just trying to scare you. You KNOW I would never hurt them. You HAVE to know that, yeah?"
Téa just stands there and Todd's chest tightens up at the utter and complete lack of empathy in her eyes. She shakes her head again.
"No, I don't."
He lights up at that, slamming a fist to his chest, shouting, "I WOULDN'T HURT THE BOYS!"
"Try telling that to Starr, Todd, tell HER that you'd never pick her up like she's a DOG, and that you wouldn't scare her like she's just another one of your victims! You go ahead and try with HER but don't you dare try that with ME."
She then lifts Brendan out of the crook of Dean's arm. She turns him and places his head under her chin, shielding him from the rain with her hand...blocking Todd's view of his face.
"I am leaving, and I am taking them with me. That's all there is to it."
He shakes his head at her, slowly, terribly. He's forgotten everything he wanted to do here.
It's all gone.
"You are all I have," he says darkly. "I will NEVER...let you go. NEVER."
Téa steels even harder at that, against the rage flashing in those eyes. She's heard those words before, in countless depositions and testimonials by domestic violence victims. She knows where those words get women.
"Well, you're gonna HAVE TO do just that."
Holding his place between them, Dean has no doubts this conversation is over. Whatever grip on reality Todd had for those few seconds, is irretrievably lost.
"Alright, Manning, you're done here. She says it's over. Now BACK THE FUCK OFF." He steps to one side, making sure he's covering Téa and Brendan completely.
Todd glances at him, then at her, then back at him. He doesn't even say anything… he can't get the words out, they're too cruel, too vile. They're pointless. Tension sends a shudder through him and his eyes bounce back and forth between Dean, Téa, and Brendan.
The boy watches him and he can tell there are thoughts behind those little eyes but he can't pick up on them no matter how hard he tries, he can't, he can't, he can't.
"Téa, don't do this, please don't."
Téa has to keep her sorrow down at that tone, that pleading that cuts right through her. She lingers on Todd's face for a moment, fighting for a sense of calm because this is it, she's leaving, and she's leaving with Todd standing right in front of her, and he looks like he's ready to kill her or himself, and he looks like he's already done it to someone else.
Where's RJ?
Tears roll down her face as she bends down to put Brendan in the car. She looks over at the other seat, expecting to find Evan…
...and she gasps in horror. She stands back up quick with wide, terrified eyes.
"He's gone… he's gone… ohmygod … EVAN!"
She yells his name again and again, looking around wildly.
Dean is taken off-guard, roving the area, the fact of Evan's absence not quite sinking in.
Todd though remains just as tense as before, just as threatening, simply adjusting his focus.
"EVAN!" Téa screams, over and over, even though it's futile...like the baby would know to answer her.
From her new hiding spot, right behind the rear tire on the other side of the car, Roseanne cradles Evan in her arms, lovingly, keeping him calm as she listens to his mother screaming for him. She kisses the baby's wet head and takes a good look at his face...the first and only time she's ever seen one of the children up close, the focus of her efforts for so long.
She looks into his eyes, and smiles, seeing Téa...Todd...heaven and hell all wrapped up and blended into this tiny, delicate face. She breathes in the rain-filled air and slides the knife out from her sleeve.
"Evan Delgado Manning," she whispers to him, musically. "You listen to me now. Hear my voice… ONLY my voice. Find your brother… seek out his beating heart with yours… tie your life force to his… make yourselves one, you are two halves of the same cell...fuse yourselves back together now. Do that for me, Evan...precious little angel boy… and I'll send you both back to heaven where you belong."
The baby stares back at her, in an eerie, entranced way...and she smiles at him again. Then she places a hand behind Evan's head, grabbing him by the collar as she stands up, finally.
Everyone freezes when they see her rise up from behind the car, holding Evan by the clothes on his back-like a cat, by the scruff of the neck. She lifts him high as she takes a step back, putting the baby right in front of her as Dean aims the piece at her.
"Ah-ah-ah...wouldn't do that if I were you, baby," she says to Dean in a dreamy voice.
His mouth falls open at actually seeing Roseanne in the flesh again… as does Téa's whose strained voice can barely be heard.
And all she can say is, "Oh my… oh my…"
The word, God, doesn't make it beyond her suddenly dry lips.
God has never been so absent.
To be continued….