Struggling for breath, heart racing, Alex ducked into the nearest classroom, slamming the door shut behind her to drown out the noise of what seemed to be the entire school whispering. She crammed herself into the furthest corner of the room, knees to her chest, making herself as small as possible. She couldn't stop shaking, had no control over any part of herself – she felt like she was falling apart at the seams.

Somehow, word of the rape had gotten around school. She didn't know who'd started the rumour or how they'd known, but it seemed like everywhere she turned, people were staring at her, whispering about her; some seemed sympathetic, but most seemed judgemental and condescending. Like she was a slut. Like she'd wanted it. Like she'd deserved it.

Finally, she couldn't take it anymore – tears building her in her eyes, panic attack building in her chest, breakdown imminent, she'd blindly dashed through the hallways until she found a safe haven for her to fall apart.

She couldn't have said how long she'd been hiding, whether it was five minutes or five hours, when there was a knock at the door. Before she could beg the person not to come in, the door creaked open and a familiar voice said, "Alex? Everything okay?"

"I'm fine," she said in a warbling voice, "Please, go away."

Footsteps approached until the intruder was sitting across from her. "Alex," he said gently. "Alex, it's me. It's okay."

She looked up sharply. "Derek?"

He offered her a gentle smile. "Just breathe, okay?" He reached over to clasp her hands in his. "Breathe."

She let out a shaky exhale, sniffled, blinking too often. "You know, don't you?" she asked because how could he not know...

He nodded solemnly. "I've heard the rumours. But as far as I know, it's just a rumour."

"It's true," she confirmed. She gave a humourless little laugh. "How could I be so stupid, right?"

"Alex, you're the least stupid person I know," he vowed, squeezing her hands.

She scoffed, shook her head.

"Hey, I'm serious," he insisted. "Alex, look at me." He waited for her eyes to meet his. "You are not stupid. This was not your fault."

"How do you know?"

"Because the same thing happened to me," he said firmly.

"Wh-what?" she asked, voice sharp and surprised.

He nodded. "My football coach. It started when my father died – at first, he was like a father figure to me...but slowly, things changed and he started asking for things. I didn't tell anyone because I needed him to get me a football scholarship because that's the only way I'll get to college. Maybe I should have told, but..." He shook his head.

"But you didn't want people to judge you, to think of you differently," she supplied.

He nodded wistfully. "When you're in high school, what people think of you feels like the only thing that matters. I'm so sorry that word got out – I can't imagine how exposed that must make you feel. But you don't need to be ashamed; you didn't ask for this, you didn't want this, and you certainly didn't deserve this."

"Then why?" she begged, once again on the verge of tears. "Why did it happen if I didn't deserve it?"

He sighed softly. "You'll drive yourself crazy asking that question because there isn't an answer – at least, not a good one. Not one you want to hear." He'd spent long enough dwelling on that very same question to know that no good would come from obsessing over it.

"I'm already going crazy," she whispered. "I can't eat, can't sleep, can't concentrate – my grades are already starting to slip..." Then, quieter, "I feel like he's slowly taking every part of me."

"Don't give him that much credit – he can't have any part of you that you refuse to let him have. He can't take anything that you don't give him." His stare was intense, trying to make her see. "You're stronger than you give yourself credit for, stronger than his attempts to break you down."

"He's already taken everything – that's kind of the point," she scoffed.

"I felt that way for a really long time." he agreed. "But with time, I came to realize that I'm a whole person – not in spite of what happened, but because of it. Because he showed me the strength and resilience I have inside of me that he can never ever take away from me. Those are the things I hold onto when it feels like I have nothing and no one."

She gave a small humourless laugh because, if there was one thing she agreed with, it was that she felt like there was no one in her corner. "I feel so alone," she whispered, her hands shaking in his. "Everyone knows, but no one cares."

"Now that's just not true. I care. And I know for a fact that Emily cares about you more than she's ever cared about anyone, more than she cares about herself. She'd do literally anything for you if she thought it would make you happy."

"That's the problem," she insisted. "She still loves me, even though it's my fault that this happened..."

"Alex, no..."

"It is! I'm the one that asked her for a break, I'm the one who pushed her away, I'm the one who agreed to meet him for coffee – none of this would have happened if I hadn't been so stupid!" she lashed out. "Sooner or later, she's going to realize that and blame me..."

"Alex, Emily is crazy about you and she's not going to give a damn about this because she loves you."

"I wish she didn't," she whispered. "Everything would be easier if she would hate me like I deserve."

"Well, that's just not going to happen," he insisted. "I know Emily well enough to know that once she's decided you're important to her, she's going to walk through fire for you whether you want her to or not. She's entirely too stubborn for her own good." He shrugged. "You should probably just accept the fact that you'd sooner outrun light itself than escape Emily's love."