Selina ran, and hated herself for running. She didn't run from anyone. Catwoman was no coward, she stood up to supervillains and metahumans and everything else. She'd gone toe to toe with the most terrifying people in Gotham … and she regularly slept with one of them, actually. Bedding Batman wasn't her claim to fame, though. Neither was facing down or working with Poison Ivy and all the rest.
What everyone in this miserable town knew was that Catwoman didn't back down from anyone or anything. She'd even stood up to Joker … but not now. Not the way he was since Harley left him.
Joker had always been the most dangerous of them all, and since Harley fought him and won, damn near killing him, he'd been even more unhinged. And Selina knew he would target her. That was the entire reason she and the whole clowder had holed up in Wayne Manor. They'd been betting on Joker going to the house tonight, and she'd moved all her cats so they could turn the mansion into a trap, but he was here instead and calling her out. Hell, Joker was already gunning for her before that.
She'd paid a veterinarian for the necropsy on Joker's little message. It was something of a relief to know he'd found a roadkill stray, that the poor thing had died of vehicular impact two days before they found it. Not what Joker or his men had done. He'd made his point. It could've been any of Selina's cats, skinned and nailed to the front door, and she knew Joker. He wouldn't have killed them first.
It could've been her.
If he could get his hands on her, she might find herself running out of luck and lives all too quickly. And the thing about Joker was, even knowing the kind of retribution that would rain down on him, even knowing Bruce might finally snap and kill him for it, if he decided to flay her alive and nail her up to a wall, he'd still do it.
Nothing had stopped him from killing Jay, after all.
Nothing ever stopped him.
And she had helped Harley. She might as well have painted a target on her own back. Selina wouldn't do anything differently, but she wasn't going to risk herself tonight. Not when every instinct she possessed was screaming at her to run. Every feline intuition she trusted told her to just get away, that standing up to him would be the end of her.
Part of her insisted that she could've stayed to fight. Practically the whole family was there, including Dinah and Kala, and a little metahuman help never hurt. But knowing that Kala would laser his arm off, or Dinah would scream him senseless, didn't seem comforting when Selina knew he wouldn't hesitate. If he got close enough to her, having the heroes around would just make him cut faster, deeper, knowing he didn't have time to do a thorough job. And she discovered that she had a horror of being disfigured.
No, there were plenty of people up there who hadn't directly pissed Joker off recently. They could handle it. Selina liked her own skin right where it was, unmarked, unscarred.
Maybe it was selfish of her, but she'd done her share of heroics already, taking care of the Southards and helping the girls get out. Pam and Harley didn't have anyone else. The heroes all had each other, and more backup beyond that.
She still felt like a scared little kitten running into the night, hearing diabolical laughter in her mind and feeling haunted breath on the back of her neck.
…
Let him get you alone. Then you can break his neck. The Empress was wide awake and humming in the back of Kala's mind, ready to take over.
She fought back on two fronts, trying to keep her shadow-self locked down, and trying to struggle only as much as was believable for an ordinary human while Joker dragged her away. No, we're not doing this, wait for Jay. Keep your cover and theirs intact. We can always kill him later, if we have to.
He hurt Jason Todd. Every moment he breathes hurts Jason Todd. And if he sees this, he will blame himself for letting us fall into the madman's hands. But if we kill the Joker, the nightmares end.
Joker booted the door open and swung her inside, letting go so that Kala flew across the small room and fetched up against the opposite wall. Two of his men had followed him, leaving the rest to handle the crowd, which meant she still had to deal with witnesses.
The Empress looked out of Kala's eyes at the three of them, and said, Kill them all.
Kala gritted her teeth against a growl, feeling her eyes sting. No. Joker is one thing. Two random thugs? No. I don't know anything about them, I can't make that call. And never mind how this flashed back to Luthor and his men, how his guards had watched her the way Joker's men were watching her now. Avid gazes agleam with menace, and they had no idea just what kind of trouble they'd backed into a corner here.
Joker himself stepped closer, looking intently into her eyes. Unlike the domino she'd worn when they last met, the Venetian carnival mask offered little concealment. It hid her features, not her gaze.
He was close, too close, and the Empress growled, Vermin, in her mind. His mere existence offended her, and Kala was horrified to realize that her darkest self had become fiercely protective of everyone in her real life, too. Her mind flashed on Babs' scars, on Jay's medical chart, on everything this psychotic bastard had done. Stamp them out, the Empress murmured. End it all. End the nightmares. Make sure he never harms another. Now, tonight, while he is in our grasp. Avenge Jason Todd, avenge Barbara Gordon. Kill his followers, too. Stamp them all out.
No, not like this, dammit. Not when I promised Jay I wouldn't do it alone, she thought, wrapping her will tight around that rage, and Joker suddenly darted in, peering closely at her. "What's that I see? Is it raw terror?" he asked, in curious tones, and then his eyes brightened with what looked terrifyingly like genuine glee. "Ohh, it's not. What a delightful surprise, you're not alone in there! Why don't you let it out, sweetheart, whatever piece of your mind this ugly ol' city fractured. Let it out, let me take a look, I won't make fun. I promise. It's so much better when you let it loose." Joker's smile was even more ghoulish than before.
Her darker half leaped forward, bristling at his implication and hungry for a chance to prove herself. It was all she had to ground herself, feeling reality swim just slightly. Once more down the rabbit hole, the feeling of shapes and shadows in the darkness beyond. And contrariwise, what it is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would, you see? A shiver ran down her spine as that particular phrase came back to her. With a brisk shake of her head, she attempted to recapture her equilibrium and managed the slightest bit.
"You don't want that," Kala told him, her voice low, fraught with the strain of keeping the Empress on a taut leash. Even now, just a little of her heat vision and she could crisp him through the eyes, boil that psychotic brain right out of his skull.
His hands landed against the wall on either side of her head, trapping her in place – if such as she could ever be trapped by a mere human. Joker was almost nose to nose with her, she could feel his breath on her face, and his voice dropped to a confiding murmur. "Oh, I don't know about that. You'd be surprised, you really would."
"As would you," she replied, and heard her own choice of words. A chill skittered down her back, and the Empress was right there with her, whispering softly, comfortingly, Go to sleep, sweet one. Let me take care of this. You can sleep, and when you wake it will be over, the world will be a cleaner, brighter, better place. I can do this for you. I can make it all stop. They cannot blame you, they will know it was I who acted. Simply go to sleep, child…
No, we cannot, Kala told herself, and held on grimly. She would know that she'd let it happen, she'd blame herself. What the others thought didn't matter. Her own integrity wouldn't let her fob off responsibility for this.
Joker was still looking at her with all the bright inquisitiveness of a vulture inspecting roadkill. "Oh, you could be a lot of fun," he murmured. "What's a girl like you doing running around with the stuffed-shirt Waynes, hmm? You're not living up to your potential. Let me tell you, doll, the last girl whose dark side I let out would never have amounted to anything without me. They don't get it, those Waynes. Trust-fund babies. Money and comfort dull the senses. Do they even know what you've got in there, hmm? It's a shame to let all that crazy go to waste."
"Harley would've been fine without you. You're a disease. And I'm not letting you infect me," Kala growled, angry enough over the situation to tell the bald-faced truth without considering how he might react.
He laughed expansively. "Sweetheart, Gotham is the disease. Or more correctly, humanity is. I'm just one of the symptoms. But I do want to know if our favorite rich boys have any clue what they're dancing with."
Kala bared her teeth, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of an answer, and shots rang out in the main ballroom. Joker turned his head toward them, and grinned. "Sounds like we've got company, boys!" he called out, then moved with eerie speed, grabbing Kala's arm and yanking her forward. Kala let him, still pretending to be human and helpless, but even she was unprepared for how swiftly he set his back against the wall and wrapped an arm around her neck.
She heard the snick of a switchblade, and it was too close to her jaw to see, but even though she knew it couldn't cut her, the threat was enough to have the Empress seething with rage. No you don't, he has no idea that knife's harmless, don't let him find out, she scolded her shadow-self.
With all of her powers, and with no kryptonite in play, Kala was as safe right now as she would've been at home. That had been the whole reason she'd let herself be taken hostage, instead of anyone else. She focused on her breathing, bracing one hand against Joker's arm, and stared at the door ready to give the 'I'm okay' signal as soon as one of the Bats broke in.
"Here, Batsy, Batsy, Batsy," Joker crooned, the switchblade tickling cold against Kala's neck. "Come on, little Batsy, Daddy wants to talk to you."
…
The frightened partygoers had been herded into the back of the room by Joker's thugs. The Bats came in through four different points of entry, Jay crashing through a plate glass window. People screamed, of course; the Bats might be the good guys, for a certain value of good, but their arrival still heralded violence.
Jay landed in the middle of the civilians, but he was up and running and firing stupid rubber bullets before Joker's men had a chance to turn his way. People scattered out of his path in a blind panic, much the same way they'd run from Joker. He was the Red Hood, after all, no one wanted to be in his way.
Dick and Tim were off to his left, Bruce was to his right, and they all converged on Joker's men. First priority was to get the guns out of play so no civilians could get shot, and Jay was good at disarming multiple opponents. There'd been four months of training on that alone. He lunged and spun and hammered his way through the men, fast and unpredictable, but all of it was muscle memory and training and reflex. His conscious mind had one thought in it, like an alarm flashing repeatedly: KALA.
Joker had Kala, and there were no good outcomes. Flickers of his nightmare, memories of the last time they'd met, fears for how this could end tonight. Jay had to get to her, he had to figure out what Joker's play was and stop it.
With the Bats fighting Joker's men, the partygoers were making a run for it. The exits were jammed up, and Jay was vaguely aware of Dinah trying to prevent a stampede, keeping order. Much to Jay's surprise, he found himself wishing that Donna hadn't already left Gotham. Another heavy-hitting meta would be nice, right about now.
One of the goons jumped onto his back, and Jay neatly spun the man off and to the ground, grabbing his wrist and separating his elbow as he did. Hell, who needed metahumans? All he needed was anger.
And Jay had plenty of that, seasoned with his fear of all the ways this could go wrong. At the center of his soul, he was angry more than anything else, furious with Joker for showing up to what should've been a nice relaxing night. They'd left a baited trap for the bastard, and by rights he should've gone to the Manor looking for Selina or her cats. Joker should've been knocked out waiting for them by now. Instead Jay had actually tried to enjoy some downtime with Kala, and of course his personal fuckin' nightmare had to roll up and ruin it. Trust the Todd luck.
They went through Joker's men like they were made of paper, and Jay saw the last two guys pop out of a little room off to the side where the caterers had set up. That was where Joker had to be, and he zeroed in on the last two men. The four of them bunched up too, Dick and Tim dropping into tumbling rolls as the Joker's goons opened fire. Jay trusted to speed, bad aim, and body armor, but he went low nonetheless, knowing that automatics pulled upward as they shot, and untrained men had trouble holding the guns down. He dove, feet first like something out of baseball, and the guy he aimed for managed to dart aside … right into Tim's staff.
The same thing was happening the other way around, as the other guy dodged Dick's escrima sticks only to get his feet yanked out from under him by Bruce's sweep-kick. They were on the ground and trussed in seconds, Jay ignoring them and going for the door.
Bruce caught him, and Jay was so keyed up he actually landed a hit before he realized who had him in a joint lock. "That room has no exits," Bruce said, his voice gravelly from the digitizer built in to his cowl. "Joker must know that. Whatever he's planning, we can't barrel into it."
"He has K," Jay snarled under his breath. "Both abbreviations. I don't fucking care what he wants."
"She put herself in his path. You have to trust her to know what she's doing." Bruce's eyes behind the lenses were clear and cold, stoic as ever. "We do this together, and we do it carefully. He doesn't get what he wants tonight."
Jay couldn't decide if that was consciously mirroring Joker's own words, when the two of them confronted each other in Crime Alley. He didn't really care, he could admire Bruce's manipulative skills later. "He doesn't get her, either," Jay growled.
"No, he doesn't," Dick said from beside him. "He expects us through the door. B, can we bring that wall down?"
"Load-bearing," Bruce said, as Tim joined them.
And then, from the closed door, they heard Joker's voice. "Oh Batsy, what's taking you so long? Come on in the kitchen, I've gotta nice little dish here, just for you."
Tim scowled. "At least she hasn't killed him yet."
And that little reminder – that Kala could kill Joker, if she wanted, even with kryptonite on board she could laser his fucking head right off – steadied Jay just enough.
As if Tim's words had been prophetic, they all heard Joker yelp in pain, and any thought of careful went right out of Jay's head again. He broke Bruce's grip and leaped for the door.
…
Joker snarled at his men, "Get out there!" and they went, leaving Kala alone with him. She wasn't afraid, not really, not of him. She was more afraid of the Empress circling in her mind, showing her flashes of Luthor's security guys, the one who tried to choke her out with a grip a lot like Joker's arm across her throat.
He wasn't strangling her, anyway, just holding her, and Kala was waiting for the perfect opportunity to twist away from his grip. She could pull his hand away just enough to escape the knife, and she'd been trained in a dozen ways to escape a choke-hold. There was nothing here to be afraid of … except losing control, and tearing this murdering bastard into pieces for everything he'd done and would do.
Yelps of pain and the thud of weapons meeting flesh came to her through the door, and Kala knew Jay was there for her. She grinned triumphantly; Jay would keep her steady, Jay would keep her from ceding control to her darkest self. Joker would go back to Arkham tonight, and no one could say that Jay was a mad-dog killer or she was a dangerous liability.
They didn't have to kill him tonight. Not in front of witnesses.
It went quiet outside, and Joker tightened his grip on her neck. Kala felt the cold knife-blade touch her jaw, and wrapped her fingers more securely around Joker's wrist. She was ready to pull him away just enough…
To her surprise, Joker's other hand came up, grabbing her mask. Kala tried to snatch it back, not wanting him to see her face un-obscured. It'd be bad if he recognized KLK, worse if he caught a hint of the Blur, and she heard his taunting voice call out to Batman even as they struggled over the mask. Kala stamped on his foot, making him yelp.
Pain didn't stop Joker. He managed to rip the mask away, panting in her ear, "I want 'em to see your eyes, pretty," and Jay burst through the door like retribution. Kala elbowed Joker hard, still trying to grab the mask with one hand; she took the other off Joker's wrist to make the I'm-okay hand sign the Bats had taught her over the summer.
She was okay, they could do this like hostage negotiation, whatever Joker wanted he wasn't going to get, but Bruce and his three boys were all in the room and everyone had tranq darts. It would only take a moment or two to provide an opening.
Kala didn't even realize she'd made one minor miscalculation that was about to become major.
…
Jay saw a scene from his nightmare, Joker with a knife to Kala's throat, and what if the sonofabitch had kryptonite? What if? And yet she gave the okay sign, she didn't even look scared, and Jay wanted to yell at her not to be so fucking flippant. Joker was never predictable, never safe, he would've let her fight Ivy and Scarecrow and Mask while he just coached from the sidelines before he would've let her do this.
Joker snatched her mask off, and she elbowed him, grabbing at it, ignoring the knife. Jay started to raise his gun and saw a bullet-hole in her forehead, forgetting in the heat of the moment that he was only loaded with rubber bullets. The worst he could do, even with kryptonite in the mix, was bruise her. He had forgotten that as the nightmare seemed to take hold of reality, and lowered the gun, taking a long stride forward. No plan, no training, just let him get his hands on the murdering fuck to give Kala enough of an out to shake loose, and the primal part of his brain spoke up in blood-red and Lazarus-green, showing him a vision of himself and Kala each grabbing an arm and just ripping Joker in half like a fucking wishbone. With her powers and the adrenaline pulsing through him, it might just be doable.
He didn't get the chance.
They had all assumed – Kala had assumed – that Joker wanted a hostage. For what, no one had yet figured out, but they'd had to negotiate with him before.
It turned out Joker hadn't wanted a hostage at all.
He looked straight at Bruce who was coming in behind Jay, smiled even as Kala got her hands on her mask again, and said, "Tell Harley this is for her."
Jay saw the knife dig into the corner of Kala's jaw, her eyes going wide with shock, and Joker raked it across her throat with a showman's flourish, shoving her away from him as he did. Jay had cut enough throats in his time to know that would've severed her carotid and jugular; he saw Joker's bicep bulge under the suit with the force necessary to saw through her trachea. Even the shove was familiar, the best way to keep fountaining blood from staining the attacker's clothes; a sliced carotid artery could jet six feet into the air.
Kala stumbled, off balance, dropping her mask as her hands flew to her throat, and the stunned look in her eyes was just the same as his nightmare.
Jay grabbed for her, his heart seizing, his brain vapor-locked, and he had no idea what to do, how to fix it, he just yanked her close…
… "Jesus fuck," Kala said, her voice whispery with shock, and it was only then that he realized that her skin wasn't marred. Her throat wasn't cut. She wasn't bleeding at all.
No kryptonite, the knife couldn't touch her, and Jay wanted to kiss her for being alive and shake her for being so stupidly brave and hug her father for passing on that invulnerability all at the same time.
He settled for crushing her to his chest, even as Joker's breath whooshed out at the impact of Bruce and Dick both cannoning into him, smashing him against the wall. The knife went spinning somewhere, Jay heard a crackle as someone stepped on Kala's mask, and he looked up just in time to meet Joker's confused and newly-concussed gaze.
"Get her out of here!" Tim snapped, grabbing up Kala's mask and shoving it at them. He had cuffs out, as Bruce and Dick slammed Joker to the ground, yanking his arms behind his back.
Only then did it dawn on Jay how dangerous this was. Kala should have been bleeding to death right now. If Joker saw her unharmed, he'd know not only that she wasn't a random hostage – she was a metahuman.
And he was seeing her face, too, a face that wouldn't be hard to find in other photos of Wayne events from the summer.
Kala snatched the mask from Tim and fitted it over her face, while Jay just picked her up and carried her out. Vengeance could wait, the most important thing was getting her away before cops and reporters showed up.
The few remaining partygoers outside left him a clear path to the nearest exit, and Jay ran like he would if she was injured, clutching Kala close to his chest. The nightmare was still clawing at his mind, making him need to look at her, to make sure she wasn't dying.
…
Fuck fuck FUCK, was all Kala could think. Joker had just caught a glimpse of her face, and she hadn't been able to push the knife away in time. She'd felt that, the narrow cold metal skimming right under her jaw, and part of her could hardly believe that she was uninjured.
If Joker saw that, he'd know he picked a meta for a hostage. At least the rumors around Gotham were that the new metahuman in town was an Amazon; God bless Selina for that. And there were other metahumans in the world, some who didn't wear costumes. And for all the disbelieving wonder of it, the Empress had stood down when she told her to. And when it was least expected, something that actually frightened her in a way she was still stunned by.
She didn't get much chance to process, because Jay snatched her up bridal-style and ran out of the gala. Shocked as she was, Kala stayed curled into his arms, listening to his wild heartbeat until they were out of the venue before she shifted her grip. Her arms going around Jay's shoulders, with only a instant's warning, she flew them both to the parking deck. Jay didn't fight her, just going with it. They both needed a little space in which to think.
As soon as she set them down, though, Jay seized her shoulders, holding her away from him and looking at her frantically. "Red, Red, it's okay, it's okay. I'm fine," Kala said, trying to reassure him as well as herself, her hands rising to his arms.
To her immense surprise, Jay shook her. Kala gasped, letting herself flop back and forth for a second, until Jay yanked her close again and shouted, "How can you be so fuckin' brave and so fuckin' stupid!"
The regret stung her immediately then; from the moment she had walked into that room without him, Kala had known this was coming. And he had every right to be upset, she knew that, but she had to make him understand. Steadying herself, Kala resisted the next shake. "Jay, stop! There was no other choice. Someone had to distract him. It had to be me, I couldn't let him take someone else."
Even with his helmet on, Kala knew the look on his face and it hurt. That she was the author of that pain made it worse. "It didn't have to anything, you don't serve yourself up on a goddamn platter," he bellowed.
"Jay, there were children there," she protested.
"So fucking what, Dinah was lookin' out for them," Jay spat.
As much as she felt for him, that tore it. He was upset and angry, but he didn't mean that and she knew it. Kala's temper flared at that disregard. "And if Dinah had done what I did, she'd be dead now. I was the only one who could, Jay!"
Jay shuddered, and pulled her into his arms, hugging her tight. Kala wrapped hers around him; despite the yelling and the shaking, she was far more freaked out by Joker, and Jay was her security. "Thought I fuckin' lost you," he mumbled against her hair, trembling.
Just hearing that note in his voice made her want to yank the damn helmet off and make him forget all about the last half-hour, find some way to make it up to him right now. As it was, she had to settle for leaning into his shoulder. "I know, I know, I'm sorry, Jay, I'm sorry," she murmured back, squeezing him tight. "I only had a second to decide, it was the only thing I could think of."
"Fuckin' think better, Jesus fucking Christ," Jay grumbled.
"I'm okay," she told him. "I'm okay, and if it had been anyone else, they'd be dead."
"She'd be dead," Jay corrected, shuddering. "This was never about a hostage. We thought Joker would stay away because something this public would bring us – the fucker was counting on it. You heard what he said to Bruce?"
Kala shivered. Tell Harley this is for her. And then the knife, cold pressure against her neck slicing right across, if it had been anyone else tonight they would've died.
Jay growled. "He thinks we might know where Harley is. Hell, he knows Selina helped them. He wanted to send a message to Harley, paint us all in some random woman's blood. Fucking hell, he might even want to go back to Arkham. It'd be an invitation to Harley to meet up and end this before anyone else dies for her mistake."
"Well he's fucked on that account," Kala snarled. "She's long gone, and he can stay in Arkham 'til he fucking rots."
"Hell yeah," Jay said, rubbing her shoulders. "Although who knows, maybe some night I'll work out a way to pay a visit. This has to stop."
"I'm going with you," Kala said firmly.
And then, before Jay could agree or protest, something else he'd said caught her attention. Joker knew Selina had helped Harley… "Where's Selina? Joker was trying to call her out," she asked, listening for the thief's voice.
"She bolted. There was no way for him to know for certain she would be there, she wasn't on the guest list, and you never know who Bruce Wayne will bring to a party," Jay said. "I don't think he ever actually saw her, but she got away anyway. Can't blame her, I wouldn't stick around."
"Oh, thank God," Kala sighed. "I didn't see her once it started."
There was a pause, and Jay's frown deepened. "Although … shit. Joker knows she's not at home. And he knows about Selina Kyle and Bruce Wayne. He called her, out, so he know she could be here. That's worth leaving a couple guys by the back door, right?"
Kala closed her eyes, focusing her hearing as hard as she could. That slight, sardonic drawl, the playful lilt … no, she didn't hear Selina anywhere. "I don't hear her. Fuck, Jay, we better check."
He hit his comm. "Oracle, Blur and I are good. Where's Catwoman?"
The reply took a second to come back. "She doesn't carry a comm. And – her phone's offline."
Kala and Jay both muttered curses at that. "I'll go…" she began, turning to leap into flight.
Jay yanked her down. "The fuck you will," he cut her off.
She only looked at him; she was the most mobile, she could cover more ground than anyone else, and even though she'd just scared the hell out of him and herself, she wasn't hurt. There was no reason for her not to search.
And he knew it. Growling his frustration, Jay let her go. "Get your fucking uniform first, anyway," he said. "I want you on the comm if anything does happen."
Kala nodded, and pulled him to her, resting her forehead against the helmet. "I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry, Jay, I'm sorry."
"Yeah, don't be sorry, just stay the fuck alive," he grumbled. "Who the hell's gonna buy my groceries if you get killed, huh?"
She gave him the same impossible smile – the same loving smile – he'd seen earlier, and then flew them both to his car.
…
Batman got the situation under control and regrouped on the roof. Minus Hood and Blur, of course, but they were likely having a moment of panic and unexpected relief.
He'd had his own moment, watching that knife glide across her throat. Even if he hadn't known Kala and liked her on her own merits, watching his friend's daughter be murdered in front of his eyes was sure to waken his worst nightmares. Bruce knew he'd be seeing his parents' shades in his dreams tonight, when he finally let himself sleep. In waking life, he had to check old photos to remember the colors of their eyes; in nightmares he remembered the exact shade of lipstick his mother had worn to the theater.
And it would be worse for Jay, who'd seen his own mother die … but not by violence. Watching cancer steal a life was different than seeing someone he loved be murdered only inches from his helpless hands. Bruce didn't need to see under that helmet to know how stricken Jay had been, when Joker raked that knife across Kala's throat.
It couldn't be easy for Kala, either. She'd expected to play hostage, and hopefully learned the one lesson everyone eventually did, if they survived encounters with Joker. He could not be predicted. They had all thought he would stay away from a high-profile event, and when he did show, they'd all made the same mistake of thinking he wanted a hostage.
No. Joker only wanted to send a message to Harley: not even the Bats could protect her. Bruce could've fired two Batarangs into his shoulders, Jay could've shot him in the face, but with the knife already pressed beneath the shelf of her jaw? There was no way to stop him from killing his victim.
Except that the victim wasn't what he thought, and now Joker had that knowledge. He wouldn't have missed the lack of arterial spray. The boys had gotten Kala away, hopefully before Joker got a good look at her face, but he would've noticed the absence of blood on the ceiling and their uniforms. The best Bruce could hope for was that the head trauma of him and Dick smashing him into the wall would result in some short-term memory loss.
No use in hoping. Better to plan for Joker knowing there was a metahuman in the mix. He'd have to sort through the possibilities and see how much Joker could possibly learn.
His comm sparked up then, cutting off his train of thought. "Have any of you heard from Catwoman?" Oracle asked.
"Negative," Batman replied. She'd looked at him when Joker started calling 'Here kitty', and shaken her head. Bruce trusted her instincts, if Selina believed it was too dangerous, he would never have asked her to stay and risk herself. He hadn't wanted her in Joker's sights to begin with, but she'd placed herself there, and now all he could do was try to protect her.
"Her phone is off," Oracle said. "And she hasn't reached the Roost, Hood's bunker, or her own apartment yet. I'll be a lot happier when we know where she is."
She wouldn't say what they were all thinking. Joker had plenty of men left to him. If he hadn't brought all of them inside, if he'd left a couple on watch and they caught Selina when she was out of uniform and looking over her shoulder instead of in front of her…
Bruce hadn't let her see what was left on her building's front door. She'd found out later, of course, but he didn't want that image in her mind. One of the odd quirks about Gotham's criminals was that most of them did have a definite line they wouldn't cross. Harley and Ivy would steal and kill, but they'd actually rescued a few women in peril. Very few of the rogues would harm a true innocent; the mob was worse for that than the masks. They didn't tend to hurt children or animals.
Except Joker. He had no rules. Only Joker would nail a dead cat to Selina's door. All the chaos her cats had caused in Wayne Manor had become more poignant, once Bruce saw that pitiful little body with its paws outstretched in ghastly parody of crucifixion. If Joker had done that to one of hers, to the silly creature crying for a taste of cheese or the fluffy one who liked to sleep in Jay's room or the tabby who played with Dick's shoelaces…
Selina would've stopped at nothing, even risked her own life, to kill Joker. She might be afraid of him – little though she'd admit it – but she'd have vengeance for that at any price.
And now, if Joker had played long odds, if he'd been very lucky, if Selina had been a little careless … his men might have Selina herself. They were not quite as dangerous as Joker, he would normally trust her to handle herself against Joker's goons, but with Selina out of contact, the possibilities were dark.
"Catwoman's always careful," Dick said aloud.
"Let's find her," Tim replied.
"I've got Blur and Hood already covering a search pattern," Babs told them, and fed them the same coordinates.
…
Babs scanned all the cameras in the vicinity. She finally saw Selina, not on the street-level doors. She'd gone out the rooftop, wearing an evening gown, ditching her heels and running barefoot. Babs tracked her to the parapet, where she'd jumped a ten-foot gap, and then to the next building. That one abutted the first, but was a story shorter. Selina landed rolling, wrecking the gown, but she was running hard enough that it was plain to Babs she didn't care about anything except distance.
Except … wait, she went over the edge and disappeared. Babs saw a likely window, and gave those coordinates to the team. Kala would be the first on the scene, as always, and she waited for a response, trying not to hold her breath.
"No heartbeat on that floor," Kala reported. "It's an office building, I'm not hearing anything inside."
"Look for any disturbance, tracks, any sign of passage," Babs told her.
"The floors are carpeted. I'm looking," Kala replied.
While she searched, Babs scanned the other cameras around the building. She didn't see Selina at the ground floor, or up on the roof again, or on the front of the building anywhere. It adjoined two others, and she looked at both of them.
"Anything?" Jay asked, his voice harsh with worry. Bruce was silent; if he had nothing useful to add, he wouldn't speak, just stew in his worry.
Babs read them all the coordinates of the building. "I have no sign of her coming out, but she could be in either of the adjacent offices. And there's an alley behind it. No cameras there." She started searching for wireless doorbell cameras in that area. Some savvy Gothamites put them up on their windows to watch the alleyways; Selina wasn't the only thief in town, just the best.
"There's a piece of fabric from her dress caught in the stairwell door," Kala reported. "No tracks in the stairwell, but I've got a whiff of her perfume going down."
"Damn, we've got a bloodhound on the team," Dick said, impressed. Babs had them all on the same circuit.
"I wish. I can't tell where she left the stairwell without a visual cue. My nose isn't that precise." Kala sounded rueful, but Babs knew she was searching.
"She'll have wanted to avoid all surveillance," Bruce finally said. "Force of habit, and first principles. If she isn't already on her way to a secure location, she'll be hidden somewhere nearly inaccessible and almost impossible to locate."
"I live for the 'almost', Batman," Babs told him dryly. And grinned fiercely; she'd found a wireless camera in a window of the residential building across the alley. It didn't have the greatest view, but she could see at least one possible egress route. "Blur, go to the alley. I see some power lines crossing between buildings."
Only someone with Selina's daring would try using a live power line to slide from one building to the next. But she knew that the charge was only lethal if it could run through her body. A non-conducting material – like her purse strap, perhaps – would isolate her hands from the line. And the alley was narrow, it wouldn't take her long to slide across.
"Even better, I've got a clothesline," Kala reported. "And a partial handprint on the window it leads to. Recent, still warm in infrared, so it's probably hers."
Babs switched to the front of that building, checking all the cameras she could find. Meanwhile, Bruce was telling Kala, "Follow carefully. That building is occupied."
"I know. Too many heartbeats nearby," Kala said regretfully. "Going quiet."
At least Selina appeared to have evaded anyone set to capture her. Babs could relax, a little … but if she had been laying a trap for Catwoman, she would've placed watchers along the route back to the Manor. Would Joker take that long of a shot? Did he have the manpower to do it? Would his employees stay on the job once they heard he'd been taken into custody? The police scanners were alive with the news, and despite using codes, the sheer volume of chatter and the tone of the officers' voices were enough to clue in anyone listening.
Babs had scanned through several cameras, seeing nothing of interest, when she heard Kala hiss, "Ow, goddammit!"
…
Kala was acutely aware that, one, she was technically breaking into someone's apartment. And two, she was not trained for this at all. With her hearing cranked up, every little sound startled her. She'd come in via the kitchen window, and the rattle of the ice-maker had damn near scared her into a heart attack. She floated, not wanting to risk even tip-toeing, through the silent kitchen and into the hallway beyond.
There were five heartbeats in this small apartment, all of them steady. Kala looked around; the rooms behind her were probably bedrooms, and four of the heartbeats were there. Three bedrooms, maybe a couple and two single people – she didn't see any sign of children, no art on the fridge, so it was probably a roommates situation.
The sixth heartbeat was in the front of the house. It might be a situation like her own, where the intended living room had been turned into an extra bedroom. Rents on the good side of Gotham could be ruinous. Or it could be Selina, hiding. Or it could still be a bedroom and Selina might've slipped out the front door, leaving some trace that would point out her next move. Kala went that way, listening, cringing a little as she passed the hallway nightlight. Everyone seemed asleep, no one would expect a random Kryptonian drifting up their halls like a ghost, but it made her feel far too visible.
It also cast her shadow on the wall ahead of her. She paused just before reaching the opening into the living room, hearing the lone heartbeat speed up, and that pause saved her some trouble.
Selina came around the corner, a golf club in her hands, swinging with full power and deadly intent at head height.
Kala hadn't expected that, and caught it across her chin. Hovering, it knocked her back against the wall, and the lash of pain and surprise from the impact made her curse. "Ow, goddammit!"
"Ah shit, sorry," Selina whispered, dropping the golf club. "I didn't expect…"
The next thing Kala heard was a rash of startled voices on the comm … and a door behind her banging open. "Who the fuck is in my house at eleven at night?" a very angry female voice bellowed.
Kala cringed, so did Selina, and then they both heard the other doors opening, sleepy voices rapidly being raised. What decided Kala, however, was the distinctive sound of a pump-action shotgun being racked.
She would've expected that over in the Bowery, not here, but apparently some folks in Gotham preferred to be prepared no matter how good the neighborhood was. Kala didn't have much choice. She grabbed Selina in the grateful hug she'd meant to give her the second she realized the thief was okay, and bolted for the sky.
At least the window was still open. Having to break the glass with her head wasn't on Kala's to-do list tonight, but then, neither had having her throat knifed or being bashed in the face with a nine iron.
…
Babs cut all the chatter off Kala's comm, leaving the rest to listen to her line but muting them from it. "Blur, report!" she demanded.
"Ow," Kala complained. "I've got her, we're fine, we're over the building."
"I am not fine," Selina said sharply, close enough that Kala's mic picked her up. Evidently she could hear them through Kala's comm. "I like my flying first class, thank you very much, set us down on the roof right now."
"Thank fucking God," Jay said over the other comms.
"Hello? Solid ground, immediately," Selina said, sounding waspish.
"Catwoman, if you'd get your diamond claws out of my neck, I could concentrate better," Kala shot back, and Babs managed not to laugh. Somehow Selina sounded like a recently-bathed cat clinging to the curtains in hysteria.
Selina gave a shaky laugh. "Heights. Who ever thought I'd have a problem with heights? I like heights, I've scaled every building in town and jumped off a few of them but this is not good, I shouldn't be able to see the freakin' bay from here, how high up are we anyway?"
"Relax, Catwoman," Kala said patiently. "I'm going to head back to the Roost, it's safest."
"No thank you, just land me somewhere and let Batman drive me, did you miss the part where I'm not okay with this?" Selina growled, and Babs tried not to laugh. It didn't help that the tracking Kala's comm told her the Super had gone up about a mile above ground when she left the apartment building. As Babs herself knew from her Batgirl days, there were heights … and heights. So far the only person she knew with no fear of any of them was Dick.
Who spoke into the comm then. "That reminds me, you still owe me a flight, Blur."
Babs did chuckle then. "They can't hear you, Wing. Blur, Wing says you can take him instead."
"All right, all right, I'm landing on the parking deck where our vehicles are located. Just breathe, Catwoman, you're perfectly safe," Kala said soothingly.
"Nope, I don't have a parachute, if something happens to you I'm road pizza," Selina groused. "Just get me down … oh God that's faster than I thought!"
"You sounded like you were in a hurry," Kala said, and Babs knew they were about to touch down.
…
Selina bailed as soon as she saw the parking deck in range, and Kala let her go, landing a moment later. "See, you're fine," she said, still amazed that Selina of all people would freak out.
"No, I'm not, I'm gonna need therapy for this, and I'm gonna send you the bill," Selina told her, almost managing to conceal the quaver in her voice. "You don't understand, Blur, I love doing crazy shit … when it's my idea. When I don't even get to finish apologizing for bashing you in the face with a golf club and the next thing I know we're standing on air God only knows how high up without even a warning and the only thing between me and becoming a very flat cat is someone I just gave a head injury to, I am not at all okay with it. Any of it. Holy Mary Mother of God do not do that again, please!"
Kala caught her shoulders, looking into her eyes, and said, "You scared all of us. I couldn't hear you anywhere, your phone was off, we thought Joker might have planned to catch you leaving the gala, and he was trying to send a message tonight. Catching you would've been even better than cutting my throat in front of Batman. I had to make sure you were safe. And I'm sorry I scared you, but it takes more than a nine-iron to actually injure me." With that, she hugged Selina, overwhelmed by relief.
Selina stiffened a little, but when they stayed on the ground, she relaxed and hugged Kala back. "It's all right. I just … I wasn't going to hang around anywhere near where he was. I figured you would all know I'd hide. And I pulled the sim card out of my phone – I know perfectly well it can be tracked."
"Thanks for scaring the shit outta everybody," Jay said as he and the rest jogged up.
Selina gave him the finger … and then paused, stepping back from Kala with a worried expression. "Wait, you said he cut your throat?"
Kala couldn't help it, she shuddered. "Yeah. Lucky for me, he didn't have kryptonite. Still not something I want to do again anytime soon."
"Now Joker knows there's a meta in Gotham," Bruce said. "He wanted a hostage, Blur decided she could risk that more safely than anyone else, and as it happens she was right. But Joker surely noticed she wasn't hurt. Are you all right, Catwoman?"
"Take me home and feed me caviar, I'm traumatized," she replied with a shiver. "Well fuck. What does this mean going forward? Jokes already knows all of us, but what can figure out about Kala?"
"I need to run the probabilities. Nothing good, I'm sure," Bruce replied.
"At least if he asks around, you put the word out that Blur is an Amazon," Kala said.
"Yeah, well, I had to pick something that doesn't have many vulnerabilities," Selina said.
"We're all okay, there were no casualties, the civilians are safe, no one's identity got revealed," Dick said, his voice soothing. "By anyone's standards, that's a good night. Worrying about one of our own for a few minutes is a small price to pay."
No one could argue that, but Kala shivered, remembering the knife against her throat.
Selina shuddered, too, thinking about what might have been. "Yeah, I'm sorry I spooked you enough that you sicced the Super on me," she said, trying to sound flippant and failing. She turned her gaze to Bruce then, and added, "Also, for the record: I know perfectly well that Talia al Ghul wouldn't have run tonight. But discretion is the better part of valor, and my feline intuition said get the hell out of there."
Jay scoffed at that. "You're also not packing a sword or two guns in that dress, so it's not worth comparing. It's cool, Selina, no one's gonna give you grief."
Dinah added soberly, "Sometimes getting out is the safest bet. He was calling for you – better that he didn't find you. Especially with how it all ended."
Selina accepted that, and shivered. "Anyway, I'm the only one still wearing party clothes, and it's December in Gotham, so let's get in the car and head home before I freeze to death, all right? No one died tonight, it's a win no matter what Joker does next."
"We still have to disarm every trap we set in the Manor before we can relax," Dick said, and Tim groaned.
Bruce just nodded to Selina, and reached for her hand, but Kala couldn't help noticing Jay's worried expression beneath the helmet.
…
Jay managed to get himself and Kala out of trap-disarming duty, and they drove back to the apartment at a reasonable pace. Without the rest of the family around to distract him, and with Kala having changed back into the dress to be less conspicuous if they were stopped on the way, he found himself replaying that moment over and over again. Joker's sick leering grin, the knife dragging across Kala's throat, her horrified face. If he'd had kryptonite, if that had been a Lazarus blade, if she'd been low on sunlight…
Kala put her hand over his on the gear shift. "Hey. You all right?"
"No, I watched the guy who killed me try to kill you," Jay said, but that was unnecessarily harsh, and he took a deep breath. "Sorry, K. I'm … a little shook up."
"And the adrenaline is dropping off now, so you're feeling it," she said. "Do you want me to drive the rest of the way?"
"I'm good. Gives me something to focus on," he said, and wondered how he'd gotten to the point where K could offer something like that and not make him defensive, even in his present mood. If Donna had ever asked to drive, he'd take it as her thinking he was too fucked up to handle it. From K, it was an honest question, nothing more, no implications. He trusted her not to be throwing any shade.
She nodded. "I'm kinda shook up, too. This wasn't how I planned for this night to go. At all."
"That's what Joker does. Comes along and fucks up all your plans." At least while they were talking, Jay could stop the instant replay in his mind's eye. "I was looking forward to seeing whatever cute underwear you brought, too."
"Oh, well in that case…" He heard a rustling of fabric, and glanced over at Kala. She smirked at him, and she'd hiked the skirt high enough to show off a very fancy pair of black lace panties.
Somehow that sight did make the whole night a little better. The lights stayed red, so Jay took his hand off the shifter and placed it lightly on Kala's thigh. Her skin was silky-soft and warm despite the weather, and all of a sudden the replay in his mind skipped back to the cabin. "You're a damn good distraction," he said, his voice husky.
"I try," she told him, her hand covering his as she leaned her head against his shoulder. Saying, without words, that she was here for him. Always.
They weren't getting up to any real trouble in the car, and maybe not even when they got home, but it was nice to think about. Much nicer than anything else his paranoid mind could conjure up. Jay held onto that until they got home.
And then, as soon as they got onto the elevator, Kala stepped into his arms and leaned her head on his shoulder. "Hey, Red?"
He hugged her close, breathing in the scent of her perfume. Not blood. Candied fucking violets. "Yeah, K?"
"Y'know what Selina said to Bruce? About taking care of her 'cause she was traumatized?"
Immediately, he started to feel guilty. And a little stupid. He was replaying that moment like it was so horrible for him, when all he'd done was watch it happen. Kala had felt that, for the first time in her life felt a knife skim across her throat, and not that long ago she'd damn near come unglued at the realization that some knives could actually hurt her. He was being a selfish twit. "Shit, I'm sorry, K. I don't have any caviar, but…"
"Hush," she said firmly, and kissed his jaw. "You're fine, Jaybird. I was just thinking, since we're both traumatized here, maybe we need something a little more serious than caviar. More relaxing, too."
He sighed; she was too damn good for him. "Sounds like a plan to me. I know I'd rather be distracting you than obsessing over what almost happened."
"And I'd rather be distracting you than thinking about what almost happened," Kala said. "We're safe, Selina's safe, the civilians are safe, Joker's in Arkham. I think we're owed a little distraction."
The past few days had taught Jay a lot about how quickly he could shift gears, where Kala was involved. She was a balm for everything broken inside him – and the wonder of it was, he could be the same for her.
So when the elevator dinged on his floor, Jay swept everything else aside and locked it away to pick Kala up and carry her into his apartment. "I think I can manage that, K. But one thing you gotta remember."
She wrapped her arms around his neck and looked up at him with bright eyes. "What's that, Jay?"
He beamed at her, already knowing how she'd throw her head back and laugh. "My distraction isn't gonna be little."
"Jay!" Right on cue, Kala laughed, and he opened the door of his apartment planning to get rid of all their troubles the best way he knew how.