A/N: Tidbits, tidbits. Time for snacks. Thanks to ijnt for the betawork.

Uzumaki

Chapter 40

"Sorry?" Tarou repeated. "We're going to…?"

Satsuki pointed emphatically at Tsunade's frowning visage. "Paint them. Vandalise them. I want people to be scandalised."

Hanabi leaned an arm on the log, massaging her temples in silence. Tarou too, was slack-jawed.

Ashi's hand was slowly rising.

"Yes?"

"I'm not 100% on this," she said slowly, "But I feel like if I vandalise the Hokage faces, I'm going to get into trouble."

"Don't worry about it." Satsuki waved it off. "This is all part of the test."

"I don't believe you," Ashi frowned. "I feel like I'm supposed to say no. Is that the test?"

"No. You have to do it."

Hanabi let out a rattling sigh, leveling her a look so scathing that Blackfire started whining. "How," she got out. "How. How can this possibly be part of the genin test?"

"For the reasons I said."

"We need to paint the statues," Hanabi repeated, "Because in times of dissent, I may need to disobey my superiors?"

"Obviously we're supposed to say no," Tarou finished. "Right?"

Satsuki shook her head. "This is different. You have to do what I say."

"So I'm supposed to disobey my superiors if they're wrong, but not you?" Ashi asked.

"Exactly."

Hanabi closed her eyes, exhaling.

Satsuki pulled out three thick paintbrushes, setting them on the cans. "So, I'm going to give you one each.

"You have thirty minutes to get up there, climb down, and vandalise one of the faces. The more creative, the better."

"This is ridiculous," Hanabi snapped. "You're just trying to make us fail! We're gonna get in trouble for this and then you'll wash your hands of us!"

"If you impress me," Satsuki said, "I will pass you."

"And how do we impress you?" pressed Tarou. "Is there something we're… supposed to be doing?"

"Yeah, like are we supposed to be… uh… creative?" asked Ashi, tilting her head. "Or is it about them looking cool? Or making people mad at us?"

Satsuki took a moment, turning and looking at the Hokage faces herself. She turned back, looking thoughtful.

"Well," she said, "I want something that people will remember."

Hanabi looked like she was holding something back, something that Satsuki imagined having something to do with her as an Uchiha. But she bit it back to her credit, and snatched a brush and a weighty paint bucket. Ashi took hers second, Tarou last, and they all gave her a long look, like they were waiting for her to spring the joke.

"One final bit, before we begin." Satsuki pointed at Tsunade's frowning visage. "Whoever impresses me the most, gets dinner on me. And whoever vandalises Tsunade gets extra credit."

Satsuki pulled the ropes off of the log, tossing them at their feet.

"These are long enough, probably. You can figure it out."

After Tarou, Hanabi and Ashi made it to the top of the Hokage faces, in a somewhat stunned silence, they stared down onto the village in relative disbelief.

"Now what?" Hanabi sighed.

"Does someone want dibs on Tsunade-sama?" Tarou asked, a little hesitantly, finishing his knot around a sturdy looking tree.

Hanabi shook her head. "No. I'm not an idiot."

"Right," Tarou nodded. "And you Ashi?"

Ashi put her hands on her hips, humming to herself. "Yeah… I guess."

Tarou blinked. "You want Tsunade-sama?"

"Really?" asked Hanabi, something close to shock in her voice. "Ashi, you do know she's going to kill you."

Ashi looked down, cogs turning in her head. "Well, I really wanna go out for dinner. And I think she's going to kill us anyway."

"If she kills you, you can't go out for dinner," Hanabi explained slowly. "Do you understand that?"

"I don't think I'll die, right?"

"I wouldn't be so sure," Tarou warned hesitantly. "She's… I mean, have you met her?"

"The big booby lady? Sure, I've met her. She's not that bad. Though, she is really mean. She made Blackfire do an intelligence test to get licensed as a ninja dog."

Tarou sighed. "Okay. Well, you have Tsunade-sama, then. What about you, Hanabi?"

Hanabi hummed, looking down over the precipice across the tops of the five heads. "I'm going to take the Fourth."

He blinked. "Uh, that's a… bold choice."

Well, Tarou wasn't complaining. Having the pick of the other three wasn't a bad idea. The Fifth was certain death, though Ashi didn't seem to really understand the concept of death at all. And the Fourth was still a sore topic for anyone old enough to remember it. Both seemed like poor choices.

What was he going to go for? Well, anything on the First and Second seemed like an error, because nobody would be offended by them. The Third could be that sweet spot. But he did die pretty recently, and people thought of him pretty fondly… was there anything that Satsuki-sensei in particular would take to?

Ah. He knew what to do.

Satsuki called them down with a little flag she'd fashioned out of an old shirt, waiting on the top of a tall stack of gnarled flats. Three little figures clambered down tentatively like uncertain baby monkeys, hauling themselves slowly along little hairline ropes.

One by one they jumped to the roof, stumbling across and breathing heavily. They looked up.

Satsuki put a thoughtful finger and thumb beneath her chin, contemplating the art.

The Second, the Fourth, and the Fifth. She'd not expected the Second all that much, maybe the Fifth at a stretch, but the Fourth, she definitely hadn't. He was ripe in everyone's minds as a hero. Nobody wanted to think about him in any other way but that. Was it brave, was it dumb?

Looking at the big fox ears, the huge crosses on the eyes, and the big fangs peeking from his tight-lipped stoicism? Tongue sticking out and all?

Dumb. And so offensive, it was Hanabi for sure.

The Fifth had been given a number of deep set wrinkles by her lips, under her eyes and beneath her cheeks. Across her forehead was, in glaring red scrawl, 'OLD!'. Ashi, who was absolutely the only one dumb enough to do that, was almost certainly dead.

And finally, something that made Satsuki almost laugh out loud, was the Second. He'd been given a slab of dark hair, some lines giving him a frown, and a pair of distinctive Sharingan on his irises.

Satsuki had heard about his crusade against the Uchiha from her father more than once. Tarou must have been well read.

Her students looked up at her tentatively.

"So how'd I do?" asked Ashi brightly.

"Are you joking?" Hanabi snorted. "I think you're actually gonna die."

"Satsuki-sensei," Tarou asked, quietly. His hands were fumbling just a little. "Did we pass?"

Tarou met her eyes with a nervous look, even Hanabi looking nervous as she looked up at her. Satsuki looked at them with a defeated sigh, letting her lips quirk into a smile.

"Fine," she sighed, putting her hands in her pockets. "You all pass. I'll take you all for dinner."

Ashi cheered.

"But first, you have to clean. There's buckets, water and soap in the field."

"I knew it!" Ashi stomped her feet. "You tricked us!"

"You didn't know at all," Hanabi muttered.

Satsuki couldn't help a smirk. "Yet you still did it. I'll see you later for dinner."

"Where are you going?" Tarou said, exasperated. "You at least have to help!"

"I have to apologise to the Hokage," she said, waving. "Or the ANBU will get you."

"What if the ANBU come?" Hanabi yelled. "What are we supposed to tell them?!"

"Training!" Satsuki called back, and she nimbly dropped off the rooftop and into the streets.

Silence.

"I hate doing the dishes," Ashi huffed. "This is just like doing like, 100 dishes."

Before Satsuki even knocked on the door, Tsunade roared.

"Uchiha Satsuki. You dare come to my office after that shit your team just pulled?"

For a moment, Tsunade was reminded of her grandmother, Mito, and the terrifying way she yelled at her for punching a hole in the screen door as a child. She could only hope to channel that, because Tsunade had reached the very end of her rope.

Satsuki unlocked the door, leaning in with her head bowed. "Hokage-sama," she said, striding forward with an almost… happy expression?

Tsunade was perturbed, for sure, but she tried not to let up. "Do you have any idea the kind of damage that your students just-"

"I made them do it."

Tsunade stopped, staring. "What?"

"I made them do it. They're cleaning it now." Tsunade watched in awe as a smile quirked Satsuki's lips, the kind she'd never seen on the girl before in all the time she'd known her. It brought a fierce beauty to her face. Tsunade found herself dumbstruck as Satsuki laughed, shrugging. "You were right, Tsunade. I couldn't help myself from passing them. They're tenacious little bastards. Sorry I doubted you."

Satsuki offered a hand across the desk.

"Are we even?" she asked.

Tsunade stared at her, and she gave Uchiha Satsuki a long look.

It was funny, she thought, how people changed the way they did. It hadn't even occurred to her until she saw that very smile quirk Uchiha Satsuki's lips that she hadn't seen that expression on her before, but she'd never heard her apologise either. It wasn't that she wasn't the same girl from years ago, but perhaps, like herself, she was a little less caught up in her own ego, and a little more aware of the flow. It happened.

Tsunade slammed her hand into Satsuki's, giving her the fiercest and firmest handshake she could, almost yanking her halfway across the desk. Satsuki stumbled. "Fine, brat," she laughed. "I don't mind a little spine in my subordinates."

Satsuki shook her hand back despite it, stepping back with a stumble as Tsunade leaned down for a fresh bottle of sake. "So which one of your idiot genin wrote 'OLD' on my head?"

"If I told you, what would you do?" Satsuki smirked.

"Suppose I'd just be making more work for my very own hospital," Tsunade muttered, pouring out a choko. "I think I know who the moron on your team is anyway. I'll be seeing her."

"I'd think twice about attacking my genin team," said Satsuki, "They almost got me."

Tsunade raised a brow, the choko poised by her lips. "Which one of them? Hanabi?"

"All of them," Satsuki said. "But that Ashi girl is really something."

"Talented?"

"No," Satsuki frowned. "Just something. I'll see you tomorrow for mission assignments."

Tsunade threw back the cup. "Sure." She swallowed- ahh. "And by the way."

Satsuki stopped at the door, looking back. "Yes?"

"Kakashi's coming back the day after tomorrow," she said. "Maybe earlier, later, I dunno. But he's all done."

"What's he been up to?"

Tsunade shrugged, pouring out another. "To be honest? Akatsuki intel, but the specifics? Fuck knows. I hate reading the cipher so unless it's urgent, I make people just tell me in person."

"Doesn't sound up to code."

"Fuck the code." Tsunade drank another.

Shizune pushed back Satsuki, gaping at the Hokage. "Tsunade-sama! This is the second day in a row-"

"Good to see you, Tsunade." Satsuki waved, letting Shizune push past her in a fury.

Tsunade silently raised a cup as farewell.

Ashi was spookily perky even now, but Tarou and Hanabi were beginning to look very put out as they traipsed into the main square of Konohagakure to look for somewhere to eat. Tarou had found the hair he'd painted completely black almost impossible to get off, and was a lot more tired than the other two.

"Is there anywhere you guys like to go?"

"Bar-be-cue!" Ashi cheered.

Tarou shrugged. "I've never eaten out."

Ashi blinked, leaning in with her mouth agape as she strode with her hands behind her back. "Reaaally? Never? How's that work?"

Tarou scratched his head, looking away. "Just never done it."

Satsuki frowned. He looked ashamed, so she turned to Hanabi. "What about you? Anywhere you want?"

Hanabi still looked very sullen. She folded her arms. "Nowhere in particular."

"Then barbecue?" Ashi gasped, stars in her eyes.

Satsuki scanned the group. "Any objections?"

Ashi shot them both hopeful looks, and Tarou shook his head. Hanabi, sighing, shrugged.

"Bar-be-cue! Bar-be-cue!"

Hanabi smacked the back of Ashi's head, hissing. "Don't embarrass us, idiot."

"I'm not an idiot! And there's nothing embarrassing about meat!"

"Stop yelling!"

"You're yelling!"

Ashi's favourite barbecue place was familiar to Satsuki. They had come without Naruto here, when he had first started avoiding missions. Kakashi had paid: it had been a strange and surreal day. He never did that. It had felt very ominous.

Now, years later, the decor was a little different. It looked more lush: red shaded lights with ornate patterns hung from the walls, the booths were couched with slightly worn but comfortable leather, and it was busier. Even so, It still smelt keenly of marinated sweet beef, and Satsuki felt thrown right back to stranger days.

Ashi breathed in deeply, grinning toothily. "It smells sooo good! Satsuki-sensei, we can really have whatever we want?!"

Tarou looked a little excited, and even Hanabi was waiting for her response, pearlescent eyes watching her carefully for the promise of beef. She couldn't go too soft on them: they seemed to sense it. Maybe that was why Kakashi had been such a bastard sometimes.

"Don't go crazy," she warned, as the server arrived.

Ashi nodded fervently, and as they walked to their booth, even Tarou seemed cheered. They tucked in, and the server left them menus each, lighted the grill, and left them to examine as it heated.

Tarou stared at the grill. "So… how do we do it?"

"I guess you've never done it, huh?" Ashi picked up the cast iron cooking chopsticks. "Soo, they bring us uncooked food, we cook it just how we like it, and then we eat it! And they give us toppings, sauces, to eat them with! It's sooo good."

"We have to cook it ourselves?" Tarou blinked. "That's weird."

"It's like eating out but the cook doesn't do it wrong! It's really tasty, I promise, Tarou!"

"Is the meat seasoned?" Hanabi asked, not meeting their eyes as she looked at the menu. "We don't have to do that ourselves, right?"

"No, it's seasoned," Satsuki said, a little surprised. "The beef is well-marinated here."

"You've been here before, Satsuki-sensei?" Ashi grinned. "Isn't it just the best?!"

She looked at the menu, scanning. "Not for a few years. I didn't mind it."

Ashi gestured to Satsuki. "So! We can get some different cuts of beef, some pork for our main… there's a good platter here. But I really want to start with some vegetables! Can we pleaaase?"

Satsuki hummed. "How about you two? Any vegetables you don't like?"

They shook their heads, and when the server came, Satsuki ordered for them, with Ashi barely holding in a veritable spiel of excitement the whole time.

"So Satsuki-sensei," asked Tarou. "Why was the test like that?"

Ashi blinked. "Yeah! I wanted to ask that too. Didn't you get in trouble with the Hokage for that?"

"I did," nodded Satsuki, feeling a little big for the booth. It was strange to come to places you'd been when you were smaller: that was why she hated the Uchiha district. "I wanted to see what you three were like."

"Couldn't you have just… asked us?" Hanabi sighed. "I bet people are giving the Hokage a lot of trouble right now."

Satsuki scanned the group, and shrugged, sitting back and taking her cloak off, folding it by her side. The Uchiha symbol on her sleeve caught the eye of Hanabi, but she didn't say anything. "My old teammate," she said, staring at the familiar walls and staff from those years ago, "He was terrible for vandalising the statues. He did it a couple of times and got in so much trouble, but he just kept doing it. Said it was because he was gonna be Hokage someday too."

Hanabi looked at her sharply, but Ashi leaned into the story, hooked.

"Oh! Oh! Can we meet him?" she beamed. "He sounds really fun."

Hanabi scoffed derisively. Tarou blinked, giving her a look.

"He abandoned the village," Satsuki said. "But I think he'll be back someday. I never told him, but I think it's a good thing to make fun of our heroes every now and then. We shouldn't idolise the Hokage. Konohagakure is only the village it is right now because of everyone's hard work, not just theirs."

Tarou tilted his head. "That sounds a little bit… far-fetched."

Satsuki shrugged. "It's true," she said. "That, and it pissed Tsunade off. She sprung you guys on me."

"Ah, so that's the real reason." Hanabi rolled her eyes. "You're just mad she gave you a team?"

Satsuki smirked. "Well, I was mad that she made me test you, but I was more annoyed that I passed you. Clear the table, food's here."

The server laid down a bright platter of carrots, cabbage, bell peppers, onions, cabbage and squash, extravagantly cut and presented freshly chopped. Ashi let out an unseemly bit of applause until Hanabi shot a sinister glare.

Tarou looked hesitant, and Satsuki demonstrated by putting one of each on the grill. Tarou watched in awe, Ashi in elation, and Hanabi in mild fascination as they cooked, but the moment they were done, it became somewhat of a free-for-all, until the platter was clear and the meat lusciously presented, with dips on the side.

Tarou looked in amazement at the dips. "What's that?"

"That's kimchi! It's really spicy cabbage."

"Do you put it on-?"

"Yeah, it's like… ah, it's so good. I'm gonna put on a bunch of pork… oh, I'm so excited! Satsuki-sensei, thank you!"

Tarou beamed up at her too. "Yeah, thank you, Satsuki-sensei."

Hanabi looked up, mouth stuffed with beef. "Thanks."

"Oi! Hanabi, you can't just eat all of that-!"

"You eat so much. I won't get any otherwise."

"Liar! You just wanna get all the beef!"

The grill became crowded.

Naruto looked a little sheepish.

"Well, I forgot how many there were, y'know?"

"You're an idiot," Kimimaro sighed.

He'd unsealed all of Orochimaru's research, but it ended up spanning half the clearing in scrolls alone. It was hardly easy to just get sat down and start reading, and Juugo looked annoyed too. Naruto scratched his head: the strewn stack of scrolls looked like a pile of rubble.

"I was just tryna help, seeing as you guys wanna look at all of it," Naruto pouted. "Maybe we should check into a hotel or something. D'you guys know of any… I dunno, towns? Villages? I really wouldn't mind a nice warm bath."

Juugo frowned, looking pensive. "There's a base not far from here, and a small town not too far from it too, I think."

Naruto blinked. "No kidding? I gotta burn that too then, I guess. I was heading down far South next. I know there are some I don't know about, but they're in the scrolls and they're so long." He looked troubled. "I hate reading."

Kimimaro rolled his eyes. "As you can see, we have the best ninja on the case."

Naruto crossed his arms, turning up his chin. "Oh yeah? Go ahead and read it all you like, right here! You know it's boring too!"

Juugo threw up his hands. "Alright. How about you head to that base, and me and Kimimaro-kun can look through the texts?"

Naruto made an emphatic X with his arms. "Nope! You guys will run off with the research! I need it too, y'know."

Kimimaro massaged his temples, looking exasperated. The scrolls looked like debris, scattered across the grass. "You know you have clones? You could just send the clones to go get rid of the base."

Naruto looked thoughtful a moment, before slumping, defeated. "I guess… I kinda like seeing it with my original body, but you're right… I guess it keeps things moving. Fine. Where's this town?"

"Somewhere to the south-east of here. It's along the path leading from the canyon."

"Okay- fine... I'll seal these up, and you can lead the way, big orange!"

"Don't call me big orange, short orange."

The inn was small, only a couple rooms wide, and the owner was a stout elderly woman. It seemed to be a hot springs town, with a famous iron-enriched hotspring by the signs on the outside. Kimimaro lifted his umbrella, peering.

"Naruto."

Naruto looked excited, rifling through his bag. "Yeah?"

"How are we going to pay for this?"

"Ah! Don't you worry," Naruto grinned. "To be honest with you, in the first base I think I mighta burned all of Orochimaru's cash… or maybe he just didn't have any? I didn't check all the weird areas with traps. But he had a good amount in the North Base! So let's not worry."

"How much?" asked Juugo, raising a brow.

"If I tell you guys, you're just gonna rob me," Naruto sniffed. "But I can take care of the hotel for sure. Man, I can't wait for a bath!"

Kimimaro gave Naruto a look. "Make the clones now."

"What? Why? I wanna sit down."

"Because the hotel attendant will see 50 of you coming out of the hotel, and she will kick us out for causing trouble," he snapped. "Make them now."

"Ah- yeah… you're right. Well, whatever. Hey, Juugo, which way do they have to go?"

Juugo pointed deep into the bracket across the road. "That way. It's underground, mostly laboratories."

Stepping into the underbrush across the road from the hotel, Naruto slipped behind a tree, creating a thoroughly over the top cluster of clones and giving a couple of them high fives.

"Alright! You guys go and I'm gonna… read…"

One clone laughed at him, sprinting into the wood.

The hot springs were red, to Kimimaro's surprise. Naruto looked ecstatic.

"Is it really water?" Naruto wondered, putting a toe in.

"It's the iron," Kimimaro explained. "Same reason our blood is red."

Naruto stepped in, putting his towel aside and sinking in gratefully, letting out a happy sigh as he sank in.

"It really is more red than I was expecting," Juugo whistled, stepping into the water and placing his towel aside. "I didn't know hot springs could look like this."

Kimimaro lowered himself in as well, sighing at the warmth. "I've only visited a hot springs once."

"Yeah? When?"

"Orochimaru had us as security detail in a busy hot springs town. We stayed in an extravagant hot springs hotel," Kimimaro said, smiling fondly. "He paid for a beautiful room for all of us to stay in. The food was wonderful."

"Back when it was us two," Juugo pondered, "We went to that festival town with Orochimaru-sama. We got takoyaki…"

"And okonomiyaki," Kimimaro said wistfully, cupping a palmful of red water and pouring it onto his shoulders. "I'd never had them before."

Naruto stretched. "What's okonomiyaki?"

"Savory pancakes," Kimimaro said. "We had them with pork. It was really good."

Juugo smiled at the memory. "Orochimaru-sama bought us a lot. I almost got sick. We were only young then… I don't even remember what the mission was."

Naruto frowned. "Didn't know he did things like that."

"Orochimaru-sama was strange," Juugo shrugged, sinking deeper into the water. "A lot of the kids he picked up had nowhere to go. But maybe that was because they didn't have a choice and made good subordinates. To be honest, I don't really know much about how he thought."

Kimimaro wondered about that too. In recent years with Otogakure's increased notoriety, Orochimaru leaving the village without important reason became less and less frequent. But he never extended Naruto, who he always suspected, any such trust anyway. But those moments of kindness stuck in him like splinters, tiny but all the more deeply buried and painful for it.

"People who kill people for whatever they want… like he kept prisons and stuff," Naruto wondered out loud, "They're weird, because it seems like those kinds of people don't seem to question what they're doing. I dunno if I could imagine being so confident, y'know?"

Juugo blinked. "Didn't you kill Orochimaru?"

"Yeah, but I dunno if I'd kill anybody else. Well, maybe one or two…" Naruto put the water through his hair. "He just really had it coming."

A Naruto clone opened the door to the third lab along. The halls were loud with the sound of footsteps, whooping, jail cells clanking clang-clang-clang.

Something thumped on the glass next to him, and he jumped. "Ah! What was that?!"

Thump thump.

"Me. In the glass, dummy."

Naruto squinted at the glass, seeing a faint face in there. "Is that… are you, a person? Or are you a bioweapon? I won't let you out if you're like, a weapon, y'know."

"So it's you?" the figure said. "They've been talking about someone who killed Orochimaru."

"Sure," Naruto shrugged, coming over and looking closely at the glass. "Come on. Prove to me you're not a weapon."

"This is just my clan's bloodline," the gloopy figure sighed. "My brother could do it too. He was one of the Seven Swordsmen!"

Naruto blinked, scratching his head. "Oi, oi! I met a guy like that… one of the seven swordsmen. You're not convincing me! He was a kinda… well… I dunno if he was bad, but he had a big sword and he definitely tried to kill me!"

"I'm Hozuki Suigetsu." The figure swam around, batting the glass again. "I didn't abandon Kirigakure or anything. I just want to recollect all seven blades and reform the group in Kiri. I'll leave you to do whatever the hell you're doing. Just let me out."

Naruto squinted at the glass, and Suigetsu stared back, until he finally smashed the glass with a kick.

Suigetsu swung forward, putting a finger gun to his head. "Hey. That blade. What did you see?"

Naruto frowned at the finger. "You're weird, water bastard. I dunno where the blade is or anything... I wasn't actually conscious for my team putting it wherever they put it. It was like… a big ass sword, had a hole in it?"

Suigetsu looked closely at him, and Naruto had a brief thought.

"You know," Naruto said casually, "My teammate from Konohagakure would know where it is."

Suigetsu pressed the finger into his head. Weird guy. "What's this teammate look like?"

"Dark hair, dark eyes, but I dunno what she looks like now… probably still really like, angry looking," he said, looking pretend-thoughtful. "She's an Uchiha, so she'd be wearing their white and red fan symbol. I wouldn't fight her if she looks ready, either. She's probably really strong now."

"That last Uchiha, huh?" Suigetsu said to himself, before levelling a steady gaze. "What kinda jutsu does she use?"

Naruto had a thought. He was a water guy, huh? "Fire," he said. "Just fire. She's an Uchiha, it's their like, big thing, I think. She had a bunch of fire clan jutsu."

Suigetsu nodded to himself, looking smug. "Fine. I'll let you go. Good luck with… whatever you're doing, whiskers."

"Whatever you say," Naruto said, rolling his eyes. "See ya. The place is about to burn up, by the way."

Suigetsu blinked. "What?"

"I'm burning the place," Naruto repeated. "This is a clone. Head out if you don't wanna evaporate, water-bastard."

"Huh?!"

The meeting with Rabbit was soon.

Owl wondered. What kind of spy? Who did they work for? Danzo didn't enjoy such questions, but as was always the way, there was more at stake than loyalty.

The clearing darkened with the figure of another shinobi.

Rabbit was slender, not too tall or too short. Slender and long, not apparently a man or a woman from sight alone. But quite apparently youthful - perhaps 20, or a bit older?

"What makes the fortress?"

The figure was still. "The heavens."

Owl relaxed, sitting back onto the rotting wood of the facility. Rabbit looked around briefly, not coming forward immediately. Hesitating. Owl pulled out a scroll, a portable inkwell and brush, laying it onto a dry section of wood and wetting the bristles.

"Your message." Owl nodded.

Still, the question burned. Who? What was it? Owl had been ordered to watch Rabbit for traitorous inclinations: nothing telling, but that was the mask. It was plain, unadorned - could have been bought anywhere. Certainly not an assigned member of ROOT.

How did one figure that out in the first place? It wasn't like traitors wore badges, or stuttered. They were all shinobi.

"The squid moves," said Rabbit, walking forward and settling cross-legged on the wood. "It searches for prey in the North East and North West, but flounders in the South West and returns. The grey lizard draws close. It praises the sea. A fire begins suddenly, but all that is seen is smoke. Later, the fire dies."

Dual-encoding? Damn. Danzo was a suspicious man. Rightly so, thought Owl, scribbling it quickly into the cipher as Rabbit spoke. A few moments of silence passed between them as the letter caught up, until finally the silence broke.

"Praise to Konoha," said Rabbit. Owl held up a finger.

"One more thing."

Rabbit stared, unmoving. Sure enough, Owl couldn't discern anything. The spy was stoic in every way.

"Are you loyal?"

"To Konoha," nodded Rabbit.

"No," said Owl. "To Danzo-sama."

An unexpectedly thick silence passed between them. If Rabbit's expression had been visible, Owl wondered if anything more obvious might have been apparent. The night was syrupy between them, slowing and strange and far off.

Interrupting it, a harsh cough. Rabbit coughed the kind of cough that is thick with mucus and sticky with sickness, rattling the lungs just a little. The spy stopped a moment, breathing, before levelling an imperceptible gaze to Owl, breath still a touch shaky.

"Never," said Rabbit. "Always to Konoha, as I'm sure he knows. Goodnight."

From the way the spy left, Owl thought, it was clear there was no fear of repercussions: unabashed power, unbridled and unfearing. If Danzo dealt with Rabbit, it was only out of necessity. Someone even Danzo might fear was the best thing this world could hope for.

But that cough was disconcerting. Chunky.

It was past midnight, and the candle was burning low.

The inn was owned by an older couple, and they served nice food too. After that long bath, they had ordered sushi, soup, and a tiny bit of hot sake, and then had gotten to work, unsealing the research bit by bit. The first set was from the original base, and Naruto had started to fall asleep over the texts.

Juugo piped up, making Naruto jump awake.

"Oi. There's a text here about you, Naruto."

Naruto perked up. "Wha- really? Lemme see!"

Juugo tossed the scroll, and Naruto peeled it open, taking a look.

Uzumaki Naruto.

October 19th, 80 AK. Uzumaki Naruto arrived without Uchiha Satsuki as I ordered. Very displeased, but he's a very fertile test subject for me to examine. Karin has been a very promising specimen. I hope he will please me the same.

October 31st, 80 AK. Healing nature of chakra does not seem to have an effect on test samples. Possible weak effects. Proximity to Kimimaro will show with time if this has any merit.

November 15th, 80 AK. Seal cannot be cut out: it imprints directly onto Naruto's 'person'. This was my first encounter with a Hakke Fuuin, so tested to be sure.

November 19th, 80 AK. Blood same as chakra. No notable healing effects on third party recipients. If it is present, I can imagine the effects to be weak. B type, Kimimaro is type A, but Kimimaro did not have an adverse reaction upon transfusion. Kept this from Kabuto: I suspect he waits for Kimimaro's death. We will see.

December 1st, 80 AK. Wound healing is incredibly fast. Orange chakra implicates the Nine Tails, however even considering the size of the Nine Tails' chakra Naruto's healing is truly incredible. Other jinchuuriki do not seem to seal both yin and yang chakra of this magnitude using a single human life as sacrifice as is standard with the Hakke Fuuin. If Naruto has both yin and yang chakra this would explain the incredibly expedient healing. This sealing could prove useful to me - I have not seen this in any other Uzumaki sealing I've found as of yet.

December 25th, 80 AK. Seal appears to be different to the Third's Hakke Fuuin, that he used to seal my arms. The seal itself seems to contain a chakra-based element between the two Tetragram Seals, but otherwise is identical to any other Hakke Fuuin. I suspect this is a product of Uzumaki sealing that is not used by other Hakke Fuuin derivatives. However, it does not appear to be some unique sealing apparatus, and I cannot understand what makes the seal so different. I'd wager the chakra is a counter balance of some kind, but the mechanics are not known to me. No doubt this is Kushina's work.

January 13th, 81 AK. Kimimaro's health is improving. A consequence of that blood transfusion? Unsure, but a welcome surprise to have my vessel return to me.

January 23rd, 81 AK. Cross-testing Naruto and Karin's samples. They're most certainly both Uzumaki, but Naruto does not have the same incredible healing of Karin's samples. The Nine Tails appears to compel his healing, not some Uzumaki power, but perhaps it is only a trace in comparison to the bijuu. He does lack the signature vibrant red hair of his mother. The dull one is stronger in him, then.

February 2nd, 81 AK. No unusual findings as of yet. However, I have less samples than I expected. Some of these take longer to regenerate than others, for instance the plasma. My records show I definitely withdrew these samples a week ago. I doubt I have misplaced them. Taking caution.

February 7th, 81 AK. More samples missing. There is no doubt that the samples are being stolen. Are they being used for transfusions by a third party? I did not inform anyone of the efficacy of Naruto's tissues in restoring Kimimaro's health. Stealing Karin's samples would serve their purposes better, but those samples remain untouched. Do I have a stupid traitor in my midst?

February 19th, 81 AK. I have relocated these samples to a sealed area I have not informed even Kabuto of the location of. No further thefts. Storing my future records elsewhere for now.

Naruto stared at the scroll, squinting.

"Does it take you so long to read?" said Juugo, frowning. "I could have read it for you."

"No, I can do it!" pouted Naruto. "It just takes me a while… but um, maybe you could have a look? I don't know what it really means."

Kimimaro sat upwards, slumping against the wall, pale skin still flush from the hot springs. "What's strange about it?" he murmured, taking the scroll from Naruto's hands and unfurling it. Juugo peered over his shoulder, and Kimimaro's cheeks reddened. They both peered at the text for a long moment, and Naruto anxiously traced the weave of the tatami, hearing the wind running softly through the underbrush outside. The moon was almost full.

"Who's Kushina?" frowned Juugo. "Your mother?"

Naruto bit his lip. "Dunno. Maybe."

"Sounds like it," Kimimaro frowned. "Strange. Someone was stealing your samples?"

Naruto shrugged, his stomach turning a little. "Orochimaru never said anything about it. I know the Akatsuki are after me, so maybe it's that?"

"The Akatsuki?" said Kimimaro, staring at him.

Naruto nodded, putting a finger thoughtfully to his chin. "They're like an um, an organisation, and they capture Tailed Beasts, which I got-" he jabbed a finger into his tummy- "right here, and they tried to capture me once, but I had a really strong guy with me so they didn't manage to. Jiraiya. It was really lucky, actually."

"An organisation that's afteryou?" Juugo repeated, pointing at him. "Like people that spend their time trying to capture you?"

"Yeah!" Naruto nodded brightly. "And kill me, I think? Not sure. They wanna um, I think they wanna suck the thing outta my tummy. And they like money. Really strong. One of them's that… uh… Itachi, guy."

Naruto hummed, Juugo and Kimimaro staring in barely suspended disbelief.

"Let me get this straight," Juugo said, clearing his throat and sitting cross-legged, shifting a stack of scrolls to his right as he did. "So, you've been travelling across the country."

"Yep!"

"Burning bases and liberating prisoners-"

"Mmhmm!"

"With hundreds of your clones with your face…"

"Well, some of them have Kabuto's face on, but yeah, sure, most of 'em do I guess."

"And you have an organisation that wants to capture, and kill you?"

"Sure!"

Kimimaro lifted a plate and launched it directly at Naruto's face.

Naruto barely caught it, but it still hit him in the head with a thunk. "Is it that important?" he whined.

Juugo shook his head, and Kimimaro leaned over, grabbing Naruto by the collar and lifting him to his face.

"All of the Five Shinobi Nations knows where you are," he hissed, spit flying from his lips. "And you didn't think to tell us that you have a terrorist organisation tracking you for assassination?"

Naruto whined. "I still have a big tab at Ichiraku ramen back in Konoha too! Am I supposed to tell you about all the people that don't like me?!"

"You are the single biggest idiot I have ever met in my goddamn life," Kimimaro hissed. "We're sleeping in shifts. And next time we go out, we transform, you complete imbecile."

"Don't you have any enemies?" Naruto sighed, prizing himself from Kimimaro's grip. "It's pretty normal to have a few people after you, isn't it? Just part of bein' a, heh, desirable guy."

Juugo massaged his temples. "Is he like this all the time?"

"All the fucking time."

A/N: Naruto takes those most wanted posters as a compliment. Thanks to ijnt for beta work! She just updated Legal Blindness.

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