Chapter 29

Agent A was waiting in a limo with tinted windows when Batman and Shayera emerged from the javelin pad outside of Gotham well past midnight with Superman propped up between them.

As the masked Alfred Pennyworth exited the car and opened the door for the still-drained, post-kryptonited hero, Shayera took all of Superman's weight and helped him lower himself backwards onto the car's leather seat.

A waiting Lois gripped his shoulders to help hold him steady from inside the car and then Shayera scooped his legs up and placed them in the car, swiveling Superman to be facing forward as she did so.

"We'll see you back at the BatCave," Batman growled into the car.

Lois nodded and was completely unprepared for the whiff of BatGas that the Bat sprayed in her face, knocking her out.

"She's going to hate you for that," Superman said mildly as Lois slumped onto his shoulder.

Batman glared at him.

"I'll live," he grunted before slamming the door shut.

Shayera picked him up and began winging her way towards the cave, the Bat dangling from her arms as she flew.

"I do appreciate that you only gassed me once before showing me the entrance to the BatCave," she said cheerfully in his ear.

Batman grunted.

"Sidekicks are allowed to know their way back to base," he said.

"Sidekick!" Shayera squawked. "I am not a sidekick, buster."

She felt rather than saw her Bat's smirk.

"The rules are different in Gotham, baby," he said smoothly. "The Justice League doesn't exist here. When you're in Gotham, you're either Batman's sidekick or you're Batman."

He paused.

"Or you're in Arkham."

Shayera snorted in laughter.

"Then how come Superman knows his way into the cave?" she said.

Batman didn't answer but his smirk grew even more smug.

"Oh, my God," Shayera breathed in awe. "Does Clark know that he's only a sidekick when he's in Gotham? I bet he doesn't."

"I've always done my best to treat him in a manner appropriate to his demotion when he's in my town," Batman said virtuously. "If he hasn't figured it out by now, it's on him."

Shayera's chest shook against his back with laughter.

"I love you, you ridiculous, snarky man," she said to him. "How come you don't treat me like I've been demoted if I'm such a sidekick?" she murmured flirtatiously in his ear as they continued flying.

"I do," Batman said to her honestly, turning his head to look at her in the starlight. "You naturally take the subordinate role when we're out patrolling," he said to her. "Even though you're kicking more ass than I am," he added with humor.

"You're such a good soldier it probably comes naturally to you," he said as Shayera frowned in thought. "Don't you notice how you always let me take the lead if there's a question of what to do? You look to me to give the order."

"Well, you know Gotham best," Shayera said in surprise. "It's your local criminals, your police force… if we have to deal with petty arrests and gathering evidence for a case, or a particular super-villain you've gone up against before, it makes sense to listen to you," she said.

"That's being practical," she continued, sounding puzzled. "But you're never rude to me about it," she said.

"That's because you never think you know better than me," Batman said with a low chuckle.

"And Clark does?" Shayera said, sounding highly amused.

Batman snorted.

"Do I really need to answer that?" he said.

"But it's your town!" Shayera said in disbelief.

"Yes," Batman said back to her. "This is why I love you. You understand these things without me needing to spell them out," he said to her dryly. "Clark, on the other hand…"

"Gets talked down to by the Bat at every opportunity when he dares to come to Gotham City?" Shayera teased him and he chuckled.

"Exactly."

Inside the limo, the masked Alfred Pennyworth glanced in the rearview mirror at Superman and the passed out Lois Lane as he drove them towards the BatCave.

"I do apologize for the BatGas, sir," he said. "I am afraid that I could not convince Batman to forgo it this once."

"It's probably just as well, Alfred," Superman said with a worn-out smile. "Lois's head might explode if she knew how to get to the BatCave and couldn't tell anyone about it."

"Well, we would not want that," Alfred murmured.

"She won't blame you," Clark promised.

"I should hope not," Alfred said with a shudder.

Lois's temper and tongue were not unknown elements to Agent A due to a handful of very unfortunate calls overheard on speaker phone from a very angry woman to a very self-righteous Bat that had taken place over the last year since she had begun dating Clark.

Territorial was a mild word, at best, to describe Lois's protective streak when it came to Clark and as Superman and Batman tended to clash on occasion…

Alfred was hoping to have made himself scarce by the time that Lois awoke. And to have made Lois a pan of her favorite homemade cinnamon rolls to go with a nice fresh pot of coffee. Perhaps that would keep him out of the firing range of the feisty reporter.

He hoped.

Shayera and Bruce were waiting in the BatCave by the time Agent A's limo pulled in. It wasn't the standard Batcar by far, but Bruce had thoughtfully (although he might deny it was anything but a practicality) called Lois from the Legion of Doom battle aftermath to let her know of Clark's run-in with kryptonite.

She had taken the night train down to Gotham from Metropolis, where Alfred had picked her up at the station and driven her to the javelin launchpad, transforming himself into Agent A en route with the help of a black mask. Batman was unwilling to have Lois Lane picked up in the Batmobile in order to protect both his and Superman's identities and so a limo it was.

Since Clark had no serious injuries aside from the residual weakness from his exposure and shot to the leg of kryptonite, Batman had offered to host him 'in the BatCave' for his recovery, where he had the same solar-light lamps as the Watchtower medbay was equipped with that would more quickly recharge Superman's cells.

But Bruce had undeniably made the offer for Lois's sake, so that she could be near Clark as he recovered. Shayera had helped Bruce carry the healing lamps up to a spare bedroom in the mansion while they waited for Alfred's return so that their friends could rest more comfortably than in the BatCave medbay.

"You pretend you're not, but you're awfully sweet under that gruff exterior," Shayera had smiled against Bruce's chest as she hugged him tight when they had finished setting the room up.

"I'm not the only one," Bruce had said back with a raised eyebrow and a smirk. "Who was it who came down to Gotham to check on a sad and depressed Bat against his will a few weeks ago?"

Shy giggled.

"These defects of character will remain our secret, Bats," she said warningly.

"Pretty sure Lois and Clark are going to figure it out," Bruce sighed back with a smile, looking at the cozy bedroom made ready for their friends, the luxuriously silky bamboo sheets and hand-sewn quilt turned down on the king sized bed that sported an elaborately carved antique wooden headboard. Plush oriental carpets covered most of the original hardwood floor and while the powder blue velvet curtains were drawn shut, the bay windows overlooked Alfred's kitchen garden when they were opened.

Alfred routinely kept the ensuite bathroom stocked with shower supplies and Bruce had placed a thick lavender-scented sleep mask for Lois on her pillow so that she wouldn't be kept up by Clark's recovery lights.

"Pssh," Shayera said breezily. "As long as you insult Clark enough to make up for this unusual display of kindness, he won't suspect a thing," she teased. "And you already got Lois once with the BatGas. If we're lucky, she'll interpret the rest of your goodwill as a bribery attempt to keep her from stabbing you to death in your sleep."

"Which is another reason why we'll be sleeping up in our Batledge bedroom, far from Lois's clutches," Bruce had laughed, bending his head down to kiss Shayera long and hard.

Back down in the BatCave, Alfred opened Clark's door as Bruce and Shayera walked over to assist him upstairs.

"I'll carry you, Clark," Shayera said, bending inside the car to scoop him up in her arms, "and Bruce will carry Lois."

"When will she wake up?" Clark asked with some concern.

"As soon as I give her the Batwake spray," Bruce said casually.

Clark raised an eyebrow.

"Why don't you give it to her now?" he asked Bruce. "Instead of carrying her over to the medbay."

"We're not going to the medbay," Bruce said, "and I don't want her to see the BatCave," he added as he gently tugged Lois out of the car and picked her up.

"And I do not wish to be present when Ms. Lane awakes," Alfred added humorlessly, picking up Lois's overnight bag before shutting the car door.

"We set you up in a room upstairs," Shayera explained as she lazily flapped her wings, mostly hovering in place to keep pace with Bruce as they made their way to the elevator as a group.

"Oh," Clark said with some surprise. "You moved all the lamps up there?" he said, looking to Bruce with a certain amount of wonder on his face.

His friend nodded slightly.

"Just so Lois wouldn't see the cave," Shayera said with a sassy smirk, winking at her fiancé, who had to fight a smile. "Not because we're being nice or anything," she said.

"Of course," Clark said with a soft chuckle. "I expected no less," he said, and even though he was smiling, his eyes still looked dewy and soft and emotional in a way that made Batman feel quite uncomfortable.

"Thank you for calling Lois, Bruce," Clark said a minute later as the elevator deposited them behind the conservatory bookshelf.

Batman grunted.

"Alfred would have gone on strike if he had to listen to another angry phone call from her," he grumbled.

"Indeed," Alfred said dryly. "Because a certain master of the house insists on putting Ms. Lane on speakerphone in my hearing whenever she calls."

"Anywhere in the house is in your hearing when it's Lois," Bruce snarked.

"But one does not need to put her on speakerphone, does one, Master Bruce?" Alfred pointed out.

Bruce's smile won this time.

"I like having a witness," he said. "In case she tries to use something I say against me later."

"I believe the correct phrase is, 'misery loves company,' sir," Alfred said severely.

Clark laughed softly.

"This is what you deal with every day now, Shayera?" he said to the Thanagarian who was still carrying him as she slowly flew through the house.

"What are you talking about?" Shayera said with a laugh. "This is how people are supposed to have conversations," she said easily. "Makes me feel like I'm back home," she said with a smile that couldn't quite hide the catch in her voice, and now her eyes were a little wet and Bruce was meeting them sympathetically.

Clark, too, was looking at Shayera with a lot of empathy.

"Sometimes I envy Kara, having something to miss of Krypton's culture," he said gently.

"You're better off, probably, not knowing anything but Earth," Shayera sighed.

"I don't know," Clark said wistfully, "it's not easy to always feel so alien when I've spent my whole life here. I never feel like I belong, yet I don't have any memories of belonging somewhere else to fall back on," he said.

Bruce didn't react outwardly, but his heart clenched at hearing Clark's words. He and Supes were friends, finally, after an initial touchy start to their relationship which even now dissolved into arguments and sarcasm on a not entirely infrequent occasion. Still, Clark was undoubtedly the best friend he'd had in the League until Shayera and for a long time, the only one who knew Batman's secret identity as Bruce Wayne.

But for all that, Bruce couldn't say that he and Clark were in the habit of sharing overly personal details with each other. So it was somewhat heartbreaking to hear his friend speak so matter-of-factly about an always abiding sense of being an outsider.

"I suppose I can understand that," Shayera was saying to Clark, "but it's awful, too, to know that I can never go back. And that there's nothing left to go back to," she added in a lower voice, referring to the destruction of the Thanagarian homeworld in the Gordanian war.

A destruction that occurred after Shayera refused to let her people destroy the Earth in an attempt at salvation.

"The grass is always greener," Alfred mused.

"What's that?" Shayera said to him, wrinkling her brow.

"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence," Clark expanded for her, giving Alfred a wry look. "Means it's in our nature to think everyone else has it better, or that we have it worse."

"Everyone has it worse," Batman growled, "ourselves included."

Shayera and Clark and even Alfred chuckled at the Dark Knight's broody outlook on life.

"Thanks for reminding me of that, baby," Shayera said gratefully, though, her eyes twinkling.

And Clark almost didn't catch it, but he had to clamp his mouth shut to keep his jaw from falling to the floor, because Bruce gave Shayera the tiniest of winks.

"Oh, wow," Clark said softly when Shayera carried him into the guest room and laid him on the bed.

"This is opulent," he said, turning his head to admire the antique furniture and wall tapestries and what might in fact be original Matisse paintings.

"You've never stayed in this room before?" Shayera asked him innocently as Bruce laid Lois on the bed next to Clark.

Clark gave Bruce an amused glance.

"The only times I've been in the mansion have been as press to cover an event," he said. "I've never been upstairs before or in any of the cordoned off rooms at a party," he said. "And the times I've stayed over, I've been in the medbay."

"Because you were hurt," Bruce groused. "Not because I was being an asshole."

"To be fair, you were being that word, too," Clark said primly.

"Well, that's because somebody refuses to acknowledge who the authority in Gotham is, sidekick," Shayera grinned at him.

"What?" Clark said to her, staring in befuddlement first at Shayera and then at a smirking Bruce.

"The Justice League doesn't exist in Gotham, Clark," Shayera said patronizingly. "I'm sure Batman was only being an asshole to try to help you learn your place."

Clark looked at them blankly for a moment.

"Wake Lois up," he said suddenly. "I don't quite know what's going on here, but I can tell I need her to defend me."

"That is my cue to leave," Alfred said, promptly turning to exit the room. "Please inform Ms. Lane when she finishes eviscerating Master Bruce that I shall have hot cinnamon rolls ready for her breakfast in the morning."

"Will do, Alfred," Clark laughed. "Thank you."

Alfred nodded and briskly made his escape before Bruce leaned over and sprayed Lois with the Batwake gas. She sputtered and coughed and looked up and around.

"Clark!" she said with relief as soon as she realized that he was at her side in bed. "Where are - you!" she said in a low, angry voice to Bruce upon seeing him.

"Now, Lois," Bruce said appeasingly, his eyes twinkling, "you already got an exclusive on the Watchtower," he said. "You can't have one in the same week on the BatCave, too."

"You knocked me out!" Lois yelled at him. "Without warning!" she said, glaring at him.

"I'll warn you next time," Bruce said placidly.

"Liar," Lois muttered under her breath.

"He knocked me out the first time he brought me to the BatCave, too," Shayera said comfortingly.

"But we're not even in the BatCave," Lois said, looking around. "Are we in your house, Bruce?" she said, raising an eyebrow.

When he nodded, she sniffed.

"Well, it's about damn time you invited us over," she said.

"Lois," Clark said, trying not to laugh.

"What?" Lois protested. "Even Lex fucking Luthor has had us over now," she said, and Clark couldn't help the laughter anymore.

"I don't do houseguests," Bruce said calmly.

"Except for a certain Thanagarian," Shayera said saucily, cuddling up to him.

"You're my fiancée," Bruce said. "You live here. Not a guest."

"You're engaged?" Lois gasped as Clark said, "Fiancée?"

Shayera turned to them and smiled and even Bruce's face seemed warmer and brighter.

"Shayera can't be associated with Bruce Wayne," he growled, though, "so don't go reporting on this."

"You'll get married on the Watchtower, I guess, then?" Clark surmised and Bruce nodded.

"Wow," Lois breathed. "I never thought I'd see the day," she said, shaking her head. "Does Diana know?" she asked slightly nervously.

Bruce groaned and Shayera sighed.

"Noo…" the Thanagarian said. "Don't tell her, ok? We'll tell her ourselves. Later. There was a lot going on this week."

"Tell her soon, please," Lois frowned.

"We will," Bruce promised.

He moved to switch on the solar lights for Clark.

"You have a sleep mask there, Lois," he said as he went around the room.

Lois turned and her expression got a little softer when she saw it laying on her pillow.

"Thank you, Bruce," she said a little more peaceably. "For all of this," she added. "But don't go knocking me out again," she frowned.

"No promises," Bruce winked and she huffed at him.

"Good night, Lois. Night Clark," Shayera said as she and Bruce moved to leave the room.

"Good night," they said back.

"We're going out on patrol," Bruce said, pausing with his hand on the doorknob, "and we sleep down in the BatCave now, but you can call my cellphone if you need anything from about four a.m. on," he said. "And Alfred sleeps one floor up, Lois, if you need anything before then while we're still out."

She nodded back at him.

"Alfred said he's making you fresh cinnamon rolls for breakfast," Clark added and Lois beamed.

"I love that man," she said passionately.

"You and me both, sister," Shayera laughed as Bruce shut the door behind them.

Lois turned in bed to look at Clark.

"They sleep in the BatCave?" she quietly screeched. "Oh, my God, did Diana ever dodge a bullet," she giggled.

Clark chuckled.

"I'm glad Bruce found his match," he said, though. "He's been through so much in his life."

"And what have you been through tonight?" Lois said, laying down next to Clark and gently rubbing her hands over him in worried caresses.

"Batman knocked me out before I could even kiss you," she pouted, putting her arms around Clark's head and kissing him enough to make up for it.

"I'm so glad he called you," Clark said fervently when Lois finally drew back.

"And that he invited you over and offered to let me stay here. I would have hated to be up on the Watchtower without you," he said tenderly and Lois sighed and rubbed her forehead against his cheek.

"I texted Perry that you got a bad stomach bug," she said. "And that I'd work from home to take care of you and keep the germs to ourselves."

"Thanks, honey," Clark said gratefully. "Will you help me get the suit off?" he asked her. "The solar rays will soak in better without it on."

"Of course," Lois said, sitting up to help. "And while I'm doing that, you tell me exactly what happened. Batman was very vague."

Clark smiled up at her as she gently peeled the suit off of his shoulders and worked it down his body.

"Lex saved my life tonight," he said.

Lois's eyes promptly popped out of her head.

"No," she breathed out. "Really?" she said. "You're sure?"

Clark chuckled.

"Not to scare you," he said more somberly, shifting his hips so Lois could continue stripping him, "but Atom was supposed to take Metallo out before he got to me but he got shot with a poison dart."

"Oh, no," Lois breathed, knowing that Metallo was the one villain who posed a deadly threat to Clark due to the robot's kryptonite heart and lasers.

"Yeah," Clark sighed. "We had a plan, but of course you can't predict exactly what's going to happen in a battle."

Lois made a concerned noise that sounded suspiciously like a frightened whimper.

"It's ok, sweetheart," Clark soothed her, reaching his arms out for her as soon as she had deposited his suit and boots on the floor. "I'm safe now."

"I know," Lois sniffed, crawling into his waiting arms, "but you almost weren't."

"Bizarro was fighting me," Clark said, stroking her back with his fingertips as he held her, "so I didn't see Metallo coming until Bizarro went down from the kryptonite. He was about to get a shot off but Lex shot him in the back."

Lois inhaled sharply.

"I still got hit in my leg," Clark said, "but that was way better than -"

"Your head," Lois filled in for him when he paused.

"Yes," Clark sighed. "Lex kept firing at Metallo until he went down, but he went down on top of me and he was too heavy for Lex to pull off."

"Oh, God," Lois said in horror.

"We were in a back room and the battle in the main area was too fierce for him to grab any other heroes to help without getting killed," Clark said, "so Lex pried Metallo's chest open with a knife and cut his heart out to get it away from me."

A tiny sob escaped from Lois's mouth.

"And then Lex came back and guarded me until the battle was over," Clark finished with a little smile.

Lois sniffed and wiped her eyes, which were leaking tears.

"He said to tell you to cross one of his assassination attempts off of your list," Clark smiled.

Lois laughed a little bit.

"My shit list?" she guessed through her sniffling.

"My Ma didn't raise me to talk like that," Clark teased. "But Lex's mother apparently had no such parenting philosophy."

"I love you so much," Lois said to him, pressing fierce kisses all over his jaw and mouth.

"I love you, too, sweetheart," Clark said tenderly. "More than anything."

Lois gave a happy sigh and smiled at him. She pushed herself up onto her knees and clambered off of the bed so she could pull her clothes off, folding them neatly and laying them on the upholstered Louis XIV chair which was sure to be original.

She opened her overnight bag and slipped on a short red silk nightgown before climbing under the covers next to the naked Clark, who was laying on top of them to soak up the light.

"I don't know if I forgive him yet," she mumbled in Clark's ear as she pressed up next to him as close as she could get.

Clark rolled onto his side and snugged his arms around her.

"That's ok," he murmured back. "He still has at least three more times to save my life before we're even," and Lois had to giggle in relief.

Down in the BatCave, Bruce and Shayera were suiting back up to go out on patrol.

"The battle went well today," Bruce said to her, pressing a kiss to her bare back as she changed.

"I hope John is all right," Shayera said with some concern and Batman grunted affirmatively in response.

"His stats are good," he said. "I wouldn't be surprised if he's awake before we're back up there tomorrow."

"It's a shame Sinestro escaped," Shayera sighed. "He is a pain in the ass if I ever met one."

Bats grunted again.

"I'm going to look into where Star Sapphire and Goldface were tonight," he said.

Shayera tipped her head to look at him.

"I wonder how many no-shows Lex typically has at an all-hands meeting," she said.

Batman gave her an assessing look of respect.

"We'll check," he said.

"I'll ask him tomorrow?" she asked Batman and he nodded.

"And I'll interrogate the prisoners," he said. "After we get back from visiting John. You can help," he said with a wicked smile.

"Mm, I don't know," Shayera said, giving him a sultry look. "I might just want to watch," she said, walking her fingers up Bruce's chest.

"Oh yeah?" he said to her with a smirk.

"Yeah," she murmured, leaning in to give him a sexy kiss.

"You know," she said, turning her mouth to his ear, "you let me stay over at the mansion even before we were dating, Mr. I Don't Have Houseguests."

"I did, didn't I?" Bruce said in a low husky voice. "I wonder why that was…?" he said, pressing a kiss to her neck.

"You're the detective," Shayera said, her hot breath warming Bruce's ear. "You tell me."

"After patrol," Bats growled, squeezing her hips and making her laugh, "I will."

"You'd better," said Shayera.

He did.