Couple things, first is glitching and I can't respond to or see the new comments that come through. I do get to see them in the notification emails and they have been really encouraging and helpful, so thanks guys.
Second, one of these scenes was originally part of "A Different Angle" and I moved it because it made more sense to have the conversation now rather than then.
Third, AHH the ANGST! Honestly guys, I hate it, and I can't wait until everyone is on the same page again. My heart is all hurty and I don't like it.
"You are too late! The comet is already here and I am unstoppable!"
Flames engulfed Aang and darkness filled his eyes as the echo of the Fire Lord's cackled rang in his ears. "No! I tried! I did my best!" Aang shouted into the void, frantically moving to escape the darkness. "Stop! Please!" He shot air blasts all around him, trying to beat his way out of the confines of his mind. He felt as if his heart would explode.
"Help!"
Sokka had been trying to wake Aang when the boy shot several air blasts around the room. Sokka was knocked to the wall and stood there heaving for a moment as the wind got temporarily knocked from his chest. Directly above them upstairs, Zuko's mattress flipped out of the bed frame as an air blast cut through the floorboards from the room below. Zuko was knocked to floor, and got to his feet in a startled daze.
Katara shot up with a start as Aang's screams pulled her out of a deep sleep. She jumped from the bed then fell to the floor when the sheets twisted around her ankles. She frantically kicked herself loose then tore down the stairs to Aang's bedroom that he shared with Sokka. She threw open the bedroom doors and spotted Sokka hunched by the wall, gasping for breath. Aang was shaking, his eyes squeezed shut and tears flowed freely down his beat red face.
"Aang, wake up!" Katara called, grabbing his shoulders and giving him a firm shake. Toph, Suki, and a bruised up Zuko appeared in the doorway just as Aang's eyes finally shot open. He looked around frantically, eyes wide with fright, before zeroing in on Katara.
"Ka-Katara?" he whispered, still shaking.
"Shh, shh" Katara soothed, pulling Aang into a hug and holding him close. Her heart broke as Aang shivered against her. She could feel the pounding of his heart as his blood raced through his body. "I'm here. It was just a dream. Just a dream."
"He was there. He won, Katara. There was fire everywhere. I couldn't breath, I couldn't..." Aang hiccupped into her shoulder as the dream resurfaced in his mind. He wanted it to be an impossible dream, but it was a likely reality of the future. The comet. The screams of the world as they perished in flame. He was still blinking in the darkness, trying to pull himself out of sleep and the nightmare.
Zuko lit a flame in his palm to light the room and Aang immediately reeled back, his fears triggered by the flame in Zuko's palm.
"Sorry" Zuko stammered out. His head was still ringing from getting it banged on the floor when his mattress flipped. Aang slid back over to Katara and wrapped trembling arms around her middle.
"It was that stupid play" Toph said, coming over to sit on the edge of the bed. Aang just shook his head.
"No, its all real" he told Toph. For once, Katara didn't know what to say. Aang had been plagued with nightmares before, but before they had a plan, more people, and the added protection of an upcoming eclipse. This was not that. She just held him close and tried to get him to calm down.
"Are you ready to go back to sleep?" Katara asked, after Aang's breathing started to even out. It had been at least fifteen minutes and Toph and Zuko had already returned to bed. Aang tensed beneath her hold.
"Could...could you stay here until I fall asleep?" Aang asked slowly, "If you aren't mad at me anymore at least?" Katara shook her head and gave him a squeeze.
"I'm not mad, Aang. I'm not going anywhere" she told him. Aang nodded and Katara adjusted herself so she was leaning up against the headboard. Aang stretched out next to her and put his head back down on the pillow. Katara drew small circles in Aang's back and he sighed and leaned into the comforting gesture.
As Katara settled down with Aang, Suki went looking for Sokka who had left the room after he had initially gotten himself together after being thrown into the wall. She found him on the front porch, looking towards the full moon that was still high in the sky.
"Are you hurt?" Suki asked him softly, sitting next to him. Her sudden movement seemed to startle Sokka and he jumped slightly.
"Uh, no. My shoulder is probably going to be bruised a bit, but I'm fine. How's Aang?" Sokka asked.
"Calming down. Katara's going to stay with him until he falls asleep" Suki said, sitting down next to him. She traced his gaze to the full moon overhead. The play that evening had answered one question of Suki's and opened up a slew of others. She had always wondered why Sokka spent so many evenings on the porch or the beach by himself, just looking up at the glowing celestial body.
"You've never mentioned her before" Suki said softly after a moment. Sokka didn't turn to her. His eyes remained glued to the sky.
"I hold that one...really close to my heart, Suki. It still hurts" Sokka said after a moment. Suki took a deep breath. It hurt her to know that Sokka hadn't shared something that had shaped him so drastically. The fact that it seemed like everyone else knew about Yue made the sting even worse. True, she hadn't been happy when Sokka had shushed her back when they were watching the play, but back then she hadn't realized the gravity of the grief Sokka carried.
"Do you...do you want to tell me about her?" Suki asked, unsure of what he would say and even more uncertain of what she wanted his answer to be. Sokka turned to meet her eyes finally. He looked a little confused, but hopeful.
"Wouldn't that be...I don't know, a little strange?" Sokka asked. Suki shrugged.
"Probably, but it sounds like Yue was really important to you, and I want you to be able to share anything with me. You don't have to, but I at least want you to know that I'm hear to listen if you want" Suki said. A tear crawled down Sokka's cheek, quickly followed by another.
"Thank you, Suki" Sokka whispered. Suki nodded and put her head on Sokka's shoulder.
"Yue was a lot like you" Sokka began "She was beautiful and brave...but engaged to someone else."
"Oh" Suki said in surprise, not seeing the twist coming. "So how did you..."
"We said we would be just friends, and during the weeks at the North Pole while Katara and Aang were getting trained in waterbending we got really close. I could be myself around her and she could forget that she was a princess. We let our guards down and fell pretty easily" Sokka said. "When the attack happened and the moon spirit was killed, Yue traded her life so that the Tui could live. She had been healed by the spirit when she was a baby" Sokka explained "and she felt duty-bound to give that blessing back."
Suki was silent. She was trying not to draw similarities and compare herself to the northern princess, but she was failing rapidly.
"She appeared to me again in spirit form and said goodbye. I haven't seen her spirit since, except for a small vision earlier this spring. Aang talked with her just a couple months ago." His voice dropped off on that last part.
"Are you...are you upset that she didn't appear to you too?" Suki asked hesitantly. Sokka looked up at her, guilt written across his face.
"It's silly right? Aang is the avatar, after all. She had no business appearing to me, but I just wish..." he took a deep breath "Just wish she would tell me it's ok..."
"Ok for what exactly?" Suki asked. Sokka met her gaze and his eyes glistened as another round of tears pooled around the corners.
"That it's ok that I love someone else now" Sokka said. He looked at Suki with such intensity and her heart ached for him.
"Oh Sokka" she breathed, enveloping him in a hug.
Every minute that passed was like a little stitch on Sokka's heart. Suki smiled, laughed, and cried with him. When Katara finally emerged from Aang's bedroom, she looked through the double doors and spotted the two sitting on the porch. Suki was leaning up and Sokka brushed a strand of hair from her face. It was intimate moment and Katara quickly turned away and headed up stairs to her own room. She was exhausted, emotionally and physically. Sleep called to her once again.
The next few nights were all the same. Aang would wake screaming in a panic and Katara would run downstairs to calm him down. Zuko began getting frustrated as Katara looked more and more exhausted as the days went by.
"Why don't you let me take care of Aang if he wakes up again?" Zuko asked as they were cleaning up the kitchen after breakfast. There hadn't been any sparring going on for more than a week. Every one was just too exhausted. Instead, Zuko had continually gone down to the beach by himself to stretch and meditate. The quiet was nice and it was the only way he was keeping himself together. Katara looked up at him gratefully, but shook her head.
"I have a calming presence on him. And I want to take care of him" Katara insisted.
"You're not getting any sleep, Sugar Queen" Toph said, who had been sitting at the counter eating a mango. "The comet is only a couple weeks away. You need your strength."
"But Aang..." Katara began.
"Aang can deal with me for an evening. I'll pound the nightmares right oughta his head!" Toph declared. Katara didn't look too thrilled with this idea, but Zuko grabbed both of her hands in his, not caring what Toph might think of the heart-beat situation he was about to concoct.
"Please," he asked her softly "Just...rest, ok?" Katara blushed and looked up into his sincere gold eyes.
"Ok" she conceded.
So when Aang rolled out of the bed that night, sweating and shaking like a leaf, it was Toph who grabbed him quickly and tossed him back onto the mattress.
"Twinkletoes!" she belted into his ear, shaking his shoulders. Aang's eyes shot open.
"Ozai, he..." Aang began.
"Is no where near here. You're safe. Just calm down, ok?" Toph said.
When morning finally broke through the windows, Katara pulled herself from her mattress and walked softly downstairs. She was glad to have finally had a good night's rest, but she was worried about how the night had gone for Aang. She opened the bedroom door and first spotted Sokka who was twisted up in his sheets and fast asleep, drool coursing down his chin. Then there was Aang...and Toph.
The two were wrapped up together. Toph had both arms tightly around Aang's middle and Aang's chin was tucked over the top of Toph's head. It looked as if they both were sleeping peacefully. Katara breathed a sigh of relief.
She quietly closed the door behind her and headed outside to the water pump. The cold water was refreshing and the temperature turned her cheeks pink. Once she felt sufficiently fresh she walked over to the stable and fell forward into Appa's soft fur.
"Hey buddy" she said softly. The bison grunted in response. Katara breathed a sigh, content to never leave this spot. She felt a hand on her shoulder and it was too warm to be anybody but Zuko. She turned around, back resting on Appa's paw, and reached for him. Zuko was surprised by the initiated touch, but eagerly let his hands become folded in with hers.
"Sleep well?" he asked. Katara nodded. Bags still framed her eyes, but the sparkle had returned.
"Is it ok if I cash in on one of those special occasion hugs?" Katara asked. Zuko nodded and Katara pulled him to her. He sighed as she held him close. This sort of touch had been foreign to him for so long, but now he was beginning to depend on it.
He slowly began stroking and pulling his fingers through her hair. She snuggled deeper into the embrace and soon they slid down together to sit on Appa's paw. Katara hesitantly leaned forward and Zuko lifted his arm so she could put her head on his chest.
"Aang slept good" Zuko said, breaking the silence.
"How do you know?"
"Because I didn't get thrown out of my bed last night with an air blast" Zuko replied. Katara laughed lightly, then looked up at him in concern.
"Do you need healing anywhere?" she asked. Zuko shook his head and gave her a gentle squeeze.
"No, I'm ok." He took advantage of the sweet moment and kissed the top of her head. They were out of view of the house, and so far it sounded like everyone was still asleep. "Are you ok? This week has been crazy for sure" he asked her.
"...I'll...be fine" Katara said. Zuko didn't like that answer.
"Tell me" he said quietly. Katara sighed. She felt selfish complaining about her own personal drama. There was so much at stake right now, and her own interests didn't seem deserving of the time. But she had a listening ear and a person who had always made her feel bigger than she was.
"Aang. He's convinced we're destined to be the next Oma and Shu. World's next big romance. He confronted me about it at the theater" Katara began. Zuko tensed, trying very hard to shove down his jealous tendencies and just listen to understand. "And...I told him I was confused and that the timing was wrong" she continued. Her mind swarmed with things she felt like she should have said.
I'm sorry, but it's true. I don't see you that way.
"He...didn't take it well and he..." Katara trailed off, suddenly wondering if Zuko really was the best person to disclose this to.
"He got angry?" Zuko guessed, already familiar with the avatar's hidden temper.
"Not exactly. He...kissed me" Katara admitted. The warm cocoon she was wrapped in suddenly became a furnace. Zuko tried to hide his reaction, but his face twisted into a scowl as he imagined the event.
"You can't get mad, Zuko, please" Katara said, reaching down to squeeze his hand.
"And why not, Katara?" Zuko spat out. "I'm tired of you sacrificing your desires, your dignity, your true feelings all for the sake of protecting Aang!" Katara bristled.
"Why are you getting so upset? Is it because you think Aang is getting in the way of...whatever this is?" Katara asked, pulling away and sitting straight up. Their eyes met in equal blazing indignation. Stormy blue swarmed with burning gold.
"What, so I'm not allowed to care?" Zuko asked. "Taking care of yourself isn't selfish. Someone making you feel like you owe them is!"
"I've told you, Zuko" Katara said, clinging desperately to the belief she had held close this entire time. That right now, nothing could be about her. About anyone. This was about the world. "Now isn't the time for that!"
"You're so worried you're going to break Aang's heart and he's not going to be able to pick himself up and do the right thing! Let me tell you, Katara. Aang is stronger than that. I've seen that boy survive so much already. And he is still standing. Do you really think you rejecting him will be the thing that pushes him over the edge?" Zuko asked.
"Yes!" Katara blurted. "I can't risk it, Zuko! You should be agreeing with me!"
"No. You should give Aang more credit" Zuko said, shaking his head.
"You don't know him like I do."
"Oh, don't play that card. We need to stop beating around the bush, Katara."
"I'm not avoiding anything" Katara said.
"You actually really are" Zuko contradicted.
"The facts are. We are in a middle of a war. We are the support system for the world's last hope, and we can't let feelings and crushes get in the way of doing the right thing." Katara said, after taking a moment to collect herself.
Zuko felt burned. He'd had crushes before. He'd had Mai. He had never had anything like what he felt for Katara. It swarmed his senses and filled him with want and resolve. The fact that she just minimized what he thought they had with one word burned him worse than any flame he could conjure.
"Katara" his voice was low, cracking slightly and he reached forward impulsively, cupping one side of her cheek in his palm. She looked startled, but still miffed at him. "A crush? Is that what you think this is?" he asked her. The anger disappeared from his eyes and Katara only saw hurt there. She felt as if he was deconstructing every conviction she had with one smoldering look.
"I..." she began. Zuko cut her off.
"I can't speak for you, but this is so far beyond a crush for me...I..." the words died away on his tongue. They were powerful words, and the gravity of the emotion behind them sent him reeling. Katara's eyes widened and her heart thumped wildly.
No! None of this was fair! She wanted to run and hide. She wanted to forget about the world and be a girl contemplating her first love. She wanted to take the pain out of his eyes and kiss him for everything she was worth.
"I can't...Zuko don't" Katara whispered. She had shoved down her own opinions and feelings for so long now, it was becoming a reflex. Minimizing her feelings was becoming her way of coping with them. "It's not because I don't feel...just, please understand." She struggled to put into words what she felt inside. She was completely helpless. She pulled from his grasp, unable to look at the hurt anymore.
Zuko sat on Appa and watched her go, taking a piece of his heart with her. The comet was so close. If they were alive after it, he hoped he could make sense of the tightness in his chest. He hoped Katara could make sense of it. With that thought he headed down to the beach to let off some steam.
Katara looked out the window and watched him go. There was a murmur of conversation from Aang and Sokka's room and she walked in. Toph was seated on the edge of the bed, hair spread out wildly. Sokka was awake and Suki was sitting on the floor with her back leaned up against the foot of Sokka's bed. Aang was trying to talk about his specific fears and anxiety when Suki sat up straight and interrupted him.
"Aang" she said, "What is the point of facing the Fire Lord before the comet?" Everyone stared at her like Suki had taken a dose of cactus juice.
"Um, to stop the war before he can use the power to win?" Sokka responded slowly.
"But he basically won the war already. The only unconquered land is the North Pole and the Fire Nation has shown little to no interest in getting it back. The Air Nomads are gone, the Southern Water Tribe is scattered over the map…"
Katara hung her head at Suki's words, though she knew they were true.
"And the Earth Kingdom has fallen. What is Ozai planning to do with the comet? Azula already captured Ba Sing Se" Suki finished.
"What are you saying?" Aang asked.
"I'm saying that attacking the Fire Lord now, while you still have so much to learn, isn't a good idea. I don't think you're ready to tackle him in the weeks that we have left. Not to mention you're trying to blow the house into the ocean every night" Suki said gently.
Aang looked at her blankly. All the pressure he had felt in the past year. All the nightmares that had plagued his mind the past week. The thought that the future of the world rested on his shoulders had always felt…unfair. This way, he wouldn't have to learn fire in a couple weeks. He could keep working with his friends, then take out Ozai when he was actually ready. The pressure gone, he could actually start sleeping again.
Take out Ozai. The thought still made him so uncomfortable. That decision could be put off as well.
"I could wait" Aang finally said. "I could stay with you all and keep learning." His eyes scanned his friends, finally coming to rest on Katara. After the war, she would want to go home. This way he could keep the little family he loved for a bit longer. The way they were.
"I'm not exactly excited to go back home, either, Twinkletoes" Toph said quietly to him. "And I don't want you to risk getting fried if it can be avoided. I say wait."
"It makes sense" Sokka agreed. Katara rested a hand on Aang's shoulder.
"Wait then" she said softly. Aang looked up into her kind loving eyes and smiled.
"Ok" he said. "I won't let you down, guys."
Toph punched him in the arm before grabbing his hand.
"You never have" she said quickly.
"Weeelllll, if we were to go back over the past year there are a few times where I would say Aang let us…" Sokka began. Suki frowned.
"Not the point" she hissed at her boyfriend. Katara grabbed Aang's hand then reached for Sokka.
"Remember Sokka? Just hold hands."
The conversation seemed to be what Aang needed, and that night he slept peacefully. As for Katara and Zuko, the nights passed restlessly for them, as Zuko would spend the first few hours glaring at the ceiling while Katara cried herself to sleep more often than not. The confusion and fear were eating her up. She was glad Aang was no longer plagued with nightmares, but it also meant the answers she was hoping for were now out of sight once again.