History Sings To Us
Lapis' P.O.V.
"Why does it have to be today?" I ask Prince Charming.
"Because in two days it's the weekend, " he explains, "And then you're all mine."
"Shit. I don't want to go, "
I hadn't realized how real it was that I had to perform on a stage in front of an audience until yesterday when we had our last rehearsal. The musical will go one for three days. Today, tomorrow Thursday and Friday.
Peridot puts an arm around me, pulling me close. I hook my arm around his neck. He kisses me deeply. My lips move in sync with his as his warm hand rubs my back.
I'm laughing for no reasons at all when we separate and I rest my head next to his neck.
"Fuck, " I say through laughs.
"Me?" Peridot asks.
"Shut up, " I tell him.
"Do you not like my beautiful voice?" he asks me.
"More like you're annoying words, " I answer as I put a hand on his shoulder. Gently, I press down and he lets out a small sigh. A small weakness I've come to notice. One he doesn't even know exist. It's one of the perks of being the only woman allowed to touch him just as he is the only one allowed to touch me. No, wait. I'm wrong. He can't touch me without my permission. It's really one sided.
I place a small kiss on his neck before he engulfs me whole with his arms and continues to kiss me. Jane raises her head. I giggle and let out a slight moan when he kisses my neck. That when his phone buzzes.
"Who is it?" I ask gesturing to his phone on the other side of the bed.
"Probably no one more important than you, " he whispers. As much as I love having my boyfriend all to myself and I hate people in general, I urge him to answer.
"It's Luke, " he responds.
"Answer, " I tell him.
He answers his phone while putting his palm on my forehead and pushing me back. I take a pillow and smack the shit out of him as he falters in his speech.
"Yeah, she's gone mad, " Peridot tells Luke.
"Fine, " he hesitated and rolls his eyes before leaving the call and letting his phone fall.
"What happened?" I ask him as he let's his back fall on the bed.
"Luke needs me to get something, " he answers with as little detail as possible. By his face, probably from his house.
"Are they still at Amethysts'?" I ask. He nods.
After a moment, he sits up straight and says, "Well, we should probably get going."
I nod.
I wait for Peridot outside of his luxurious mansion house with a small backpack with my heeled shoes inside. Perhaps his house it is not large enough to be called a palace, but it is a small mansion.
Every house on the curved street is a mini castle. There is no way I would ever be able to rent much less buy something like this in my tiny little life.
Prince Charming nearly runs out of his house with a plastic bag in hand.
"Come on!" he urges me forward, pulling me away from such luxurious sights.
"What happened?" I ask him.
"Nothing, " Of course, I don't believe him.
We walk and sing a little, practicing our singing and the few spoken lines we have. He puts his arm around my waist.
I decided to stop using my sweater every day It's almost June and I don't want to sweat like hell. Especially if Prince Charming is going to be another added layer.
"Is you dad coming?" he asks me.
"On Friday, " I answer, "Today and tomorrow, he's taking my mom out."
"I praise his bravery, " he comments.
"Shut up, " I teasingly push him.
"What about your mom?" I ask even though I know how hard it is for him to speak of his mother and step-dad. Especially with his mother's pregnancy.
He takes my hand and walks quicker, "She's going on Friday too."
He keeps his normal face with a smirk, but his words are quiet.
"Wouldn't you like her to meet my dad?" I ask him.
My dad once believed Peridot to be like his father. A man who can't care for his children and abandons them. Maybe we're far too young for any of that stuff, but after he meets his mom, perhaps he'll have a slight change in opinion.
"No, " he answers.
"Why not?"
"Because I don't want Stephan to have anything to do with you, " he says. He's so firm in his decision, it worried me.
Instead of pushing him further, I take his hand and pull his arm over my shoulders, smiling at him.
"We're going to be marrying each other for the next three days, so we might as well get along, " I tell him. He smiles and pulls me close.
When we are in front of Amethyst's house, Peridot calls Luke after knocking and ringing the doorbell many times. Amethyst lives in a house with her parents, so it's kind of hard to ring the wrong doorbell and blame it on the system. But we do anyway.
"Shit, " Peridot murmurs.
"What's wrong?" I ask him. He holds a finger up, until he hangs up and tells me.
"They're already on their way to school. He said to meet up there, " Prince Charming explains.
"You're kidding, "
"Well my dear Lazuli, desperate times call for desperate measures, " he says.
"And that's supposed to mean?" I expect an answer but he only smirks like he always does and walk to to the back of Amethysts' house
"Can you do that?" I ask him.
"I can do anything I want, " he calls out. I stay in front of her house, waiting for him. Again. I hear an engine, and I raise an eyebrow.
Peridot laughs as he rides onto the street on his killing machine with a helmet in front of him, "Come on! Get on."
"No. I'm not getting on that killing machine, " I tell him.
"It's not a killing machine. It depends on the driver. I know what I'm doing, " he insists, holding out the helmet.
It's not that I don't like trying out new things, even though I don't, it's just that I would rather be miserable, but be alive.
"I don't think I trust you at that level yet, " I say.
"You don't trust me after years of knowing each other and about two months of dating, " he smirks.
"Exactly. I'm glad we understand each other, "
"Just try it once, to get to school. If you get a panic attack, I'll put this away forever, " he bets. It sounds like an amazing offer where my life hangs in the balance.
Fuck it.
Rolling my eyes, I take the plastic bag from his hands and stuff it into my backpack. Shoving my pride and my better judgment down my throat, I put a hand on his shoulder as I slide one of my legs to the other side. I take his helmet and pull over my head. The sweat forms immediately.
"Hold on, and don't be too tense, " he says.
"Don't be too tense, " I mock, "I'm holding on for my fucking life."
I wrap my arms around his waist as the motor laughs at me maniacally with it's grinding engine.
This was not thought through.
But he takes off before I can do anything else. I hold on to him for dear life. My heart almost hammers to a stop before I realize its not so bad.
The only difference between riding a motorcycle and riding a car is the air. In a car, you have restricted air conditioner whereas in a motorcycle, you have free air cuddling you from all angles.
Of course there are other differences like the seat, hanging on to someone else, my life at stake, and so many other things. But other than that, there isn't much difference.
He goes slowly, not like the time he almost ran me over. If he goes at this same pace, I may even get used to his killing machine.
We arrive at school before the others do though there are already many people waiting outside for the school to open. Many students wear black. Girls wear black dresses, no bear shoulders or skirts with flat shoes. Boys wear black dress shirt or polo shirts with black dress pants and glossy shoes. Some of them carry cases of instruments. They're the orchestra pit. Scarlett's hometown.
Most of the other students who are acting in the musical wear whatever they wish. Our costumes are inside. A few hold bags or backpacks. Probably for shoes, and extra stuff. Apart from my shoes, I hold another thing crucially essential for my survival. Food. Food and water.
Peridot stuffs his keys into my backpack as we join the musical geeks in their timeless journey to enter the ruthless establishment the government calls school.
Minutes later, the others appear. Luke runs to us and asks for his things. He sighs in relief when the plastic bag is within his embrace. I still don't know what is inside that bag.
Scarlett has a large violin case strapped over her shoulders.
Scarlett's curly red hair runs down her shoulders. She wears a black dress that outlines her figure, ending right at her knees. The straps hold against the space between the shoulder and neck.
Luke hands her the plastic bag.
"Thank you so much!" she says, "I don't know what I would have done if I didn't get my music. My teacher would have gone crazy!"
I'm guessing those are her music sheets.
"I'm so excited!" Amethyst yells with her hands in the air. Scarlett has a conversation with some of the other instrumentalists.
"You will fall, " Sapphire says. Amethyst freezes with her hands still up.
"In love?" she asks.
"On your face, " Peridot responds. The rest of us smirk.
"That's much better, " she responds.
The doors open and all of us flood in as the cattle from The Lion King. Instrumentalists go the their music rooms to retrieve their instruments or the leave their cases and bags behind.
Us actors go straight to the auditorium. The first two rows of seats remain empty, because of the space the orchestra and the music teachers take up to lead the orchestra.
Jamie is already there, giving everyone directions and perfecting the stage and all that shit.
Everyone goes backstage. Girls to the left and boys to the right. I hurry. I don't want to fail before the show has even begun.
Blue and Naomi arrive after me. But I am the last one of us three to change and get out and into our dress. It is still very uncomfortable to change in front of them. But I push through it.
After Sapphire and Ruby's alterations and tweaks, the dress fits me far better. Blue fixes my hair, combing it and fixing it until it is smooth and shiny. I greatly hesitate when Naomi offers to do my makeup with the lipstick, eyeliner, and blush. But I give in with only the light pink lipstick and a very subtle eyeliner stroke.
The heels sound against the glossed wooden planks of the stage. Naomi, Blue, and I practice The Schuyler Sisters. When Luke comes out, he gladly, joins us. The ensemble members practice dances and songs and instrumentalists practice their parts and songs. Scarlett takes out her violin, but it is an electric violin. Everyone else's violin is normal, except for an electric cello and viola.
We all get our assigned microphones. I clip mine onto the neck of my dress and turn it on.
As we dance and sing, I can't help but smile and feel the butterflies in my stomach. I've never been part of something so important, or something larger than me.
Hands seize my waist from behind as I yelp in surprise. But the arms wrap around me, digging his head into my neck.
"Fucking idiot!" I yell at Prince Charming.
"You're beautiful, " he says in a causal tone, letting everyone hear.
"They're really good actors, " Naomi crosses her arms.
Blue scoffs, "The acting got to them."
"His brain is shit. That's the problem, " I say.
"Then I got some pretty smart shits for brains, " he stands proudly.
"Shit is ssshit, " Luke says. We all laugh.
Jamie calls us to gather around the piano. We do some annoying and unnecessary vocal exercises and has us to a tongue twister before he gathers everyone's attention on the stage and the orchestra below us. He gives us what is supposed to be a motivational speech, but turns out to be a rant about how acting is so amazing and we are all ever so privileged to be part of something so very amazing.
We have them more minutes to gather ourselves before Jamie calls everyone to be backstage, and I along with a few others help close the curtains.
People begin to flood the aisles. I stand with Naomi and Steven behind the curtains peering behind the only thing keeping me from humiliations.
Naomi doesn't have her heels on. She says she'll put it on when the curtains open and the show officially begins. Steven wears his bright red monarch clothes. He'll put on his cape and crown during Farmers Refuted. He smiles, it reaches his eyes. The young Universe is excited go be part of this musical after seeing his friends be in so many.
I never wanted to do this, but finally being here and seeing everyone coming to watch us, I can't imagine being at home stuck in my own little corner with Jane. A safe little corner, a boring little corner, misjudging the greater world I had isolated myself from. A world which I had judged as it judged me so many years ago.
Where would I be if Peridot hadn't pushed me out of my corner of the world? I know exactly where I'd be.
I came as an outsider, but I stay as part of a group of people who care about each other so deeply, they're family without ever needing to mention it. They've taken me in. Steven, Luke, Amethyst, Ruby, Sapphire, Connie, Scarlett, and Peridot have taken me in as a part of their family. They haven't said so, but it is the only thing their gestures of kindness give me to say.
Jamie steps in front of the stage as the lights turn off and a spotlight shines on him. He introduces himself and tells the crowd what we're going to be doing so it doesn't look like we're fucking crazy. The crowd applauds as Steven hurries me backstage after Naomi who rushes for her shoes in the girls part of the backstage. The spotlight fades as Jamie makes his way to the pain as rehearsed. We rush to open the curtain in the dark silence while the orchestra takes their time causing my heart of hammers with the audience's praise of a show they have not yet seen.
Once the applause died down, it takes exactly right seconds for the orchestra to commence the show and Scarlett to do her violin solo thingy. The lights look down on Luke who holds himself with ease on the stage by himself.
Through the sides of the stage from below, I look up at the stage, marveled at how far we've come. The audience watches in silence.
I get ready for my entrance when Peridot goes center stage for the only few lines he has in this song. After he says his 'name' the audience claps and cheers. It takes about five seconds for them to calm down, as the conductor, or the music teacher, counts the orchestra back in. The music begins again and Peridot sings again.
I ready myself and try to calm my nerves. The stage goes black as I get on stage, my heels resonating against the silence.
It's my turn, and I sing. I have to restrain myself from smiling as I walk to center stage where I stand behind Prince Charming who's sitting in a chair. I put a finger to my lips as everyone else whispers.
The stage goes black again as I rush backstage. The lights turn back on and Luke continues to sing.
Stuff happens. Before I know it, the song has ended. There is a last best where the lights turn off and the audience claps. Some people yell stuff out there. Of course, those are mostly over-enthusiastic mothers and teenagers trying to make fun of their friends.
We all rush to our positions. Luke and Peridot stay on stage while almost everyone else including me practically runs backstage. Blue, Naomi, and I change into our new dresses and we manage to see the end of My Shot.
After the Story of Tonight, the lights dim and light the stage again on Luke who sings everything perfectly. When it's our cue, Blue almost shoves Naomi and me out because we're so fucking nervous.
I try not to look at the audience even though it's almost impossible. I smile and try to keep my eyes on every one on stage and on my feet beneath this blue dress. If I look at the audience, I'll smile too much and it'll interfere with my singing and stuff.
Yet as the clink of my heels mixes with the drums of my heart, I grin from ear to ear. With my hair flowing behind me and my feet leading, the skirts of my dress swirl around me as I do my stuff with Blue and Naomi.
When our song ends, we rush backstage as the ones in the next song set up, and the audience claps.
The three of us hurry to change into our next dresses. I swear when Naomi, Blue, and I are backstage, ninety percent of that time is spent changing.
I manage to make it out in time to watch Steven's number which is one of my favorite because of the subliminal truth behind the lyrics and because it's just generally hilarious. Especially with someone as small and adorable as Steven singing as King George III, aka. the Mad King. I don't think I've ever heard a song about another tyrant or evil person as hilarious. I don't think I've ever heard another song about a tyrant or an evil person before.
The rest of the red coat ensemble joins His Majesty in an evil nevertheless amusing tune.
"The kid's got talent, " Peridot whispers into my ear once I'm done changing and we're watching front the stairs leading to the stage. He puts a hand on my back.
"So golden buzzer?" I ask him. He smiles places a kiss on my head before the songs ends on a gruesome tone with someone's death and the next begins.
I go up with Naomi and Blue and a few others who sing the introduction. As the introduction escalates and Peridot comes in stage, ready for his part, the girls and I take our skirts and rush to the back of the stage, making our way backstage, making it seem as though we were running from something.
Blue, Naomi, and I hurry to change again. Blue finishes first, she quickly fixes Naomi's ponytail and then does my hair after I'm done. She makes tw fishtail braids at each side of my head and ties them together on the back of my head as if it were half of a crown.
Steven smiles, content with his performance and ready to do it again. His face begins to hurt. The sweat pours down as he takes the fake crown and cape off. The song ends with the guy who plays George Washington, ironically named George, holding his sword up, and Peridot standing to his right.
Like at every other ending of a song, the stage goes black and the audience claps before the music begins once again.
After A Winter's Ball, I begin my next sing by almost falling in my face and ripping my new blue dress. Thankfully Blue improvises and makes it look like I'm ranting to her about my undying love for a guy I've known for less than a month, and have only really held a real conversation through letters which take days to deliver.
My blood runs cold for a moment before I fully recover and continue my song as rehearsed. I still find it hilarious when Ruby, the hardcore soldier spy, is the flower girl to my pretend wedding. My song ends with a small little peck on the lips with my boyfriend, and Blue's begins with a drunk guy asking the maid of honor to toast.
With Peridot's hand on my hip, we each hold a plastic wine cup up. The white wedding veil on my head threatens to fall off as everyone in stage minus Prince Charming and I sing.
My mom would kill me if she saw me now.
But she's not fucking here is she? I almost laugh with tears as Prince Charming, Blue, and I do our small exchange of words. I have no idea how I've fucking survived this. I can't believe my dad is going to watch me do this on Friday.
It's embarrassing when I need to sing That Would Be Enough. It was embarrassing enough during rehearsals, now it's worse in the actual thing with people recording me. I'm gonna die when my dad see this.
Non-Stop is amazing. When the music stops with that loud and sharp note, we all stand still and I try my fucking best not to fall in the floor laughing while the audience claps.
I almost collapse when the intermission begins.
"Shit, " I tell myself.
"You okay?" Naomi asks me.
"I'm sweating and I'm half dead, " I answer.
"Then it's a normal day, " Prince Charming cuts in.
"For you perhaps, " I tell him.
He puts a hand on my waist and winks in a sly manner, "Why don't we go recharge?"
"There are maybe a hundred empty rooms upstairs. I'm sure one of them is unlocked, " Naomi points out.
"I prefer a bat to beat the shit out of this hay sack, " I push him away.
"I meant with water, " he says.
"Of course you did, " I roll my eyes. I go into the girl's backstage chambers and retrieve my backpack before heading back to the outside world filled with the chaos of words and teases. Peridot stands next to the second row speaking to a pair of men, one holding a camera and another holding a pen and a notepad. I walk to him, wary of what they can be.
As I approach, with the stealth of a blue whale. In other words, they spot me immediately.
I try to look away, but they call for me, "Miss, Lapis Lazuli right?"
I freeze and look at them. Peridot smirks. I force a smile and walk to them, handing Peridot a water bottle.
"Yes, " I say.
"On the playbill it says, you play Misses Alexander Hamilton, " he states, though it feels like a question.
"Miss Elizabeth Schuyler, " I intercede. He smiles.
"Of course. Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?" he asks. Do I really have a fucking choice?
"Yeah, " I answer.
He finishes writing something down on his notebook before looking up at me and asking me, "Have you done other musicals or plays before?"
"No. I never really was interested, " I look at Peridot, "But greater forces left me no choice."
Peridot doesn't give a fuck and smirks. The guy finishes writing stuff down and looks to me again.
"What is your experience with Hamilton within this school's musical program?"
Those are a lot of words. He could have just asked, what was it like to make this.
"It was a lot better than I thought it would have been, " I say.
"Why is that?"
Bitch. I don't have to tell you anything.
"Well, I thought it was going to be constant work and since I didn't really get along with many people I didn't like the idea but once in rehearsals I realized it wasn't going to be as bad, " I explain.
He nods his head for some reason as he finishes writing.
"Have you ever seen the actual Broadway production of Hamilton?"
"No, " I answer.
"But our friends and us plan on going this summer, " Prince Charming intervenes. The guy holding the camera moves the camera in his direction. He takes a step back.
The guy holding the notepad smiles, "Are both of you a couple? Not counting within the musical."
The sweat comes back, "Uh, what is this for?"
"They're putting it in an online blog. It's very popular, " Peridot answers.
Fuck. I've really fucked up.
"No, " I say.
"Yes, " Peridot says.
Peridot and I look at each other. The journalist stares at us.
Peridot looks back to the journalist, "We are a couple. But my girlfriend doesn't want to shout it to the entire world."
"You make it sound like it's something bad, " I tell him.
"It's not bad. I just don't mind letting people know that you're the love of my life, " he says so casually.
"Not here, " I say through a gritted smile.
"Okay, so don't worry. I won't include that, " he is obviously confused.
Peridot clears his throat, "Would you like to interview my brother? Aaron Burr?"
"Very ironic. Of course, " the journalist says.
I wait for Peridot in the second row as I drink my water. He comes back and sits next to me.
"Don't you have to get changed?" he asks me.
"Don't you?" I ask him.
"Don't be mad. They just came up to me and started asking questions, " he says.
"Really? Why is it that I doing believe that?" I sarcastically ask?
"It's the truth. Now they're bothering Luke and Scarlett, " He says.
"Scarlett?" I ask him.
"She was talking with Luke and she gladly giving them all the answers they want," he explains.
"That's great. But now I need to go change, " I tell him.
"No, wait, " he groans as he takes my wrist but I stand my ground.
"You should probably change too, " I tell him.
"Since when did you become boring?" he asks me.
"Since when did you become a fucking nerd?" I put my hands on my hips.
"You've got a point, " he says.
"I know. I'm a fucking genius, " I respond.
"But I'll see you after the musical?" he asks.
"It'll be late by then and Blue is driving me, " I tell him.
"But I do get my good night kiss before you leave, right?" his sly smile shouldn't be something I should be surprised by, but his audacity, slyness, and assertiveness in public have always found a way to shock me.
I simply roll my eyes and leave. I get changed into my next dress and I have to drink a ton if water to stay alive before it's my song even though I would prefer to stay in break.
See what I did there? I am a fucking genius.
I still don't like the song where Hamilton cheats on his wife. Even if it isn't true and Peridot has no romantic feelings for any other person, it gets to me. And it's so fucking hard to play the 'devoted wife' after watching and listening to that. I don't know the name of the girl who plays Maria Reynolds, nor do I give two shits. I try not to look at her or have anything to do with her during rehearsals, sometimes it's not very effective. But as I have previously stated, I don't give two fucking shits.
Everyone loves me. There are screams and claps when I walk out for Burn. And why would they not? I'm absolutely amazing.
My voice blends in perfectly with the instruments, but my voice is more than clear. I almost force the tears to come as I burn the letters with real fire. I hold the letters over the burning candle until they light up in flames. I get in my knees, I tear the letters in harmony with the words in my song and throw them in a bucket. I'm surprised they're letting me use real fire.
But everybody loves me. I make sure to rub it into Peridot's face. The next song I am in can be said is one of my least favorites ones. It's really uncomfortable and hard to scream and cry in front of everyone while holding on to Amethyst's smirking face. Especially with all this sad music in the background. But I get through it. And I am able to hear some people cry in the background. Did I mention I am also wearing a black mourning cape with my last dress underneath? I didn't? Well, I am! And I'm sweating like shit.
Three words. That's it. That's all I get. I am in almost every scene in Its Quiet Uptown, and I have three fucking words to say. It's also one of my favorite songs yet I still have only three fucking words.
It doesn't matter. I enjoy those three words and I do my fucking best. Prince Charming and I hug as the ensemble and Blue sing in the background.
I take the black mourning cape off and wait as my fake husband decides when he wants to kick the bucket.
Everything else is a mix of anger and sarcasm and death. Death everywhere. Literally. But I'm the survivor so it's okay.
I like Best of Wives and Best of Women. It's nice. It really shows who I truly am when I pretend to look outside the window to see how early it is and when I sing 'Well I'm going back to sleep'.
I think everyone just loves me for the single phrase now. Why wouldn't the audience love me? I am amazing and Eliza is a plain off cinnamon role like in those memes.
I'm a cinnamon roll, but if you get too close I'ma burn the fuck out of you with my melting frosting.
It's amazing how Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton survived nearly until the Civil War. When everyone around her had died. She was so strong and did so much. Now that is a devoted wife. And I'm playing that badass bitch.
The audience is crying during my last song when I explain everything I've done and continue to do to uphold my dead tomcat husband's legacy. I hear a loud sniffle when the ensemble sings the orphanage. I have to restrain from smirking and laughing.
Once Prince Charming and I cross paths and the show ends, I have a tear coming out of my eye. The stage goes black before everyone rushed backstage.
I cannot believe I actually got through that massacre. There was so much bloodshed along the way, but I made it and I fucking owned it.
My heart pounds in my chest as I pant. The sweat falls freely underneath my dress and on my face.
Peridot grabs my hand and pulls me all the way to the back. For the ending calls, he and I are last.
First are the ensembles, separately. Mind, then Peridot's, and the other ones too. Then, it's other irrelevant side characters like Charles Lee or the Samuel guy from Farmer's Refuted and the fucking Reynolds family. Then it's Steven.
The Orchestra plays the music from one of his songs as Steven walks slowly with his golden staff with full in robe and crown. The crowd cheers so loud as he gives losses with his hands. I can't help but giggle.
Then it's George Washington who comes and stands side by side with King George III. It's very ironic. The music changes to Right Hand Man and then alternates from Steven's music and George's music. I can't contain my laughter this time.
Then Blue and Naomi emerge as King George and normal George turn their ways to help in forming a semi-circle around the stage facing the audience. The upbeat Schuyler Sister song is played as the audience literally screams. I squeeze Peridot's hand as we wait.
Then it's Sapphire, Ruby, and Amethyst. The audience goes wild as a part of My Shot is played. Really. I even hear someone whistle.
They join the semi-circle as the song changes to Wait For It. If the audience could get any wilder and louder, they have. Luke bows before waving for a moment before the music goes quiet for a second before the violin part from the beginning of Alexander Hamilton plays and Luke sings, "What's your name man?"
Luke walks away backward as Prince Charming walks to the center and sings as rehearsed as the audience sings his name too. He bows before extending his hand as the music changes to when my name is sung in Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story. That's my cue.
With a nervous smile and the war drums of life in my ear, I step onto the stage and take his hand. People scream. I bow as rehearsed as the softness of the violin is blocked by the screams of my admirers who are in tears. I almost cry myself.
With my hand in his, Peridot leads me to complete the semi-circle before we all point down to the pit, and then up to the box where all of the lights and stuff are controlled.
I can't believe it was a success. Every bead of sweat and every month of dancing and embarrassingly singing in front of everyone while they stare has paid off. I still have two days to go plus Friday when Peridot's mom and step-dad will be here and my dad. It'll be chaos, but right now, nothing else matters.
People like me, they love what I've done and I'm known not because I was a victim but because I'm something bigger than myself. It's one of the best feelings I've ever felt.
Then it's over but I can't help smiling.
Friday
Thursday is just like Wednesday. One of the only differences is that I don't almost fall on my face and fuck everything up. The audience is also wilder. I'm scared to see how wild today's crowd is.
Peridot comes over, but leaves before my dad gets home. My mom is busy with extra work so she won't be back for a while. What I'm worried about is my dad's reaction to the actual show and to meeting Peridot's parents. Regardless of what Prince Charming says, I want my dad to meet his mom. So I'll just give things a little push, and then, let life do everything else. It's funny how things work that way.
As my dad waits outside for the doors to open for the parents, I finish dressing up and combing my hair with my fingers. Even after two days of doing this, it still feels very new and weird.
I climb the steps to the stage and look to the empty seats one last time before the doors open. The pulse of my heartbeat rings in my ears as I hear nothing but the echo of my beating heart, and click of my heels.
"You ready for one last day?" Prince Charming startles me.
"Yeah. Just nervous, " I admit.
"You weren't this nervous the first night, " he points out.
"Today's different. Today's the last night, " I tell him.
The last night. Months of practice and hard work gone in three days. But the last night is the most important one. It is the most defining memory I will have, the last piece of this experience I will take with me and carry for the rest of my life.
He takes my hand and drags me to a hidden part backstage, probably so Jamie doesn't tell us we're wasting our time or that the theatre is a sacred temple or some shit.
"It'll be great, " he assures me.
"Well I doubt you would have dragged me into this had it not been so great, " I tease.
The blond prince of a princess isn't fazed and simply smiles. He pulls me in, kissing me. The nervous drums of my heart steady. I know I shouldn't let myself when I have a show in about ten to fifteen minutes and my dad is outside, waiting to watch what I've been doing with my time. Waiting. For any first sign of trouble that Peridot may not be good for me.
But it's been months since that excuse has stopped me.
I put my arms around his neck as his fingers play with my dark hair. Things could be different. There were many opportunities these last seven years where life could have led me down a different path, perhaps a better one or a fate much worse. But I don't care for the not taken chances of these regretful years. Because I have him. And I'm happy. I'm happy with him, I'm happy with my friends, I'm happy with myself, and I'm happy with life.
"I kind of wish we weren't here, " his diaphragm expands and contracts rapidly as his fingers curl around my chin. I catch my breath too.
"Because you realize being in a musical was a mistake?" I jokingly whisper.
"Because a part of me would rather stay home with you, " he whispers back. I smile. He has to look down for our heads to meet. The heels make me slightly taller. I see him bite his lip.
Like the lovesick puppy I am, I kiss him again, longing for him to engulf me whole. The small yet passionate kiss we share u
is enough to make time fly. Blue surprises us, telling us to get to the stage before Jamie gives us a sermon about the holiness of the stage and how we should respect it.
The Orchestra Pit and the stage are silent. Them Jamie and the Conductor, give us a motivational speech. After that, the war drums come back to plague my ears as the Orchestra goes back to fiddling with different parts and different melodies throughout the musical.
One of the other cast members closes the curtains as everyone heads backstage. Like in the first and second night, Steven, Naomi, and I huddle where the curtains meet. My dad is one of the first to enter. He goes straight to the first row the audience is allowed to sit in, a playbill in hand. Naomi points out her parents and her younger sister and Steven, his dad.
Although it does make me nervous to see my dad in a front-row seat, it causes the war drums to stop. I smile, but not from the nerves. I don't remember the last time my parents attended an event in school that wasn't parent-teacher conferences. It may only be my dad here, but that is good enough for me.
Luke comes over, prying the curtains open and popping his head out.
"Are you're parents coming?" Naomi asks.
"My m-mom and step-dad, " Luke answers.
Prince Charming's mom and step-dad are also amongst the few to come in first. They sit in the second row, right behind my dad.
And I didn't even have to do anything.
I smile at myself.
Jamie walks on stage with his microphone as he has done the last two days. He thanks everyone for being here and gives them the brief on the show. When he is done and the audience claps, we all turn on the small microphones clipped to out clothes.
I have to try so fucking hard to not smile when I make my entrance. It's the most difficult thing to not look at my dad or Peridot's pregnant mom.
When the first song is done and we pose for a split second, my eyes wander to my dad. He looks at me too. He smiles. I smile too. All I can hear is my rapid breathing and beating heart as I silently sniff back a tear or two...or a million.
The stage goes black and I run to change. I want to be quick so I can watch my dad's reaction to the next few songs.
And I am. I finish before Naomi is done which is very fast for my standards. I make my way to the sides of the stage and watch my dad from the steps. He records most of it.
I am excited when The Schuyler Sisters starts. I run back stage while Luke starts the song off. Naomi and Blue breathe when they see me.
"C'mon!" Blue whisper screams through gritted teeth.
Then its our turn. We do our signature thing where we call our names out. Our role's names. My face hurt from so much smiling.
I dance and sing. But I don't care about anyone else, just my dad.
My dad claps. They're the only claps I hear. I hope he claps when I get fake married.
When I'm not changing, I'm watching my dad's reaction to the show. He laughs during Steven's song. And why wouldn't he? It's a fucking hilarious song with double meanings.
I go onstage with shaking legs when I have to sing that nervous solo at the beginning of Helpless. I can't tell what goes on in my dad's head when Prince Charming asks for my hand to fake dad. But he laughs during the wedding scene when Ruby becomes the flower girl. Everyone laughs. I need to keep a straight face when I go on stage with fake dad.
Peridot reads my mind when we get fake married and he kisses my cheek instead of kissing me on my lips like we've done for the last two days. My dad raises an eyebrow. I see his expression perfectly even though it's dark.
I try to keep a smile and a straight face while we do Satisfied. Thankfully, I leave after Satisfied.
I drink some water.
I don't know how I manage to do That Would Be Enough without peeing myself. I can't tell what my dad is thinking when Peridot and I are sitting and I am singing about my unconditional love and all of that. I don't know how, but I do get through it.
Non-Stop is a mess. It is just like during rehearsals and it's amazing, but I have to constantly stop myself from turning to look at my dad.
I'm scared to go outside for the intermission. But I know I have to. I have to. It's probably suicide to go outside after all of this, but I have to.
I spot Peridot backstage and I hook my arm into his.
"Come on, " I tell him.
"Outside?" he asks. I nod.
"That's suicide, " he comments.
"I know, " I admit. But there is only one way in my mind for his mom to meet my dad.
Yet he still follows me like a lamb to the slaughter.
My dad stands up when he sees us. I separate from Peridot as we walk. Prince Charming stops when he sees his mom who also stands up.
"Peri!" she says.
"Mrs. Diamond?" my dad asks. Prince Charming's skin grows colder.
"Mrs. Hillier, " she corrects. My dad raises an eyebrow at Peridot.
"Stephan Hillier, " Peridot's step-dad says as the shake hands. His dress is very formal while Lesley wears a simple light pink dress.
"You are Peridot's mother?" my dad asks. She nods.
"And you must be the father of such a lovely girl. My younger son, Luke, has told me much about her, " she takes his hand and shakes it.
"Why yes, " he answers.
"Peri, come, " His mom calls him.
Prince Charming looks more like a scared puppy. He looks to my dad, before turning to his mom and hesitantly making his way towards her. My dad takes a few steps towards me.
"He lied about his last name, " is the first thing he says.
"He didn't. He just didn't take his step-dad's name, " I defend.
"Have you met her before?" he asks.
"Once. When Peridot got sick and I dropped off his homework, " I explain with minimal detail.
"Mister Perfect didn't seem so happy to see his mother or step-father, "
"He doesn't get a long with him, "
"Lapis, " he begins.
"Dad, " I cut him short, "Is that the only things you're going to say? Excuses of why he could be bad? What about the show?"
My dad doesn't look offended, but he does shift. I would have said more, but he is my dad and has the power to either shield us as he's done the last two days or to let us crumble.
Yet even my own dad needs to have some respect. I'm sure abandonment isn't something a child is going to forget very easily. Peridot has some issues, but that doesn't make him a bad person. I will defend my boyfriend when I need to. Besides, I'm tired if hearing the cons of being with the only man I love. I wished he would just be happy and tell me how he's liking the show so far without the need to restrain himself from making unnecessary comments.
"It's good so far. Very intriguing and..." he searches for a word, "educational."
At least he didn't say he's absolutely mortified. I probably would be.
Peridot doesn't seem happy at all to be with his mom even though she praises him.
Luke walks down the steps and Scarlett joins him. They both stop and are surprised to see Peridot standing right there. Regardless, they shake it off even though they remain weary.
"Dad, this is Luke and Scarlett, " I present.
"Nice to m-meet you, " Luke says.
"Lovely to meet you, sir, " her British accent makes her flowered words seem so elegant.
"Luke is Peridot's younger brother and Scarlett is his girlfriend, " I explain.
"The pleasure is mine, " my dad says.
I look at Peridot out of the corner of my eye. He forces a smile.
"Anyway dad, I need to go change, " I tell him.
"How many times do you have to change?" he asks me.
"I'm not sure. Maybe five or six times, " I admit.
"Well it's been a long time since I've seen you in a dress, " he takes my hand and twirls me around. I smile.
"I'll see you when the show is over, " I tell him. He nods. I shoot Luke glance. He nods and rushes to his mom's side. Scarlett makes her way and talks to Stephan. As Luke takes his mom's attention away from Peridot, I take advantage of the situation and hook my arm around Peridot's and rush him away. I wave at Blue as we pass by who's with her boyfriend.
"Gentleman in distress?" I ask him.
"Lazuli, I think I almost shit my pants, " he whispers.
"Well, we don't want that. Remember these costumes are rented, " I remind him.
He manages a small smile, "What did your dad say?"
"He noticed your discomfort with your mom and stepdad, " I tell him, "And he thought you lied about your last name."
"Well, there goes my chance at impressing my future father in law, " he says.
"Impress my dad with your constant cussing to the best?" I raise an eyebrow.
His smirk is genuine, "Well I have to start somewhere."
I mentally smack his head.
"Just go change, " I tell him. He does as I say.
I also rush backstage in the girl's quarters to change into my next dress. I realize I am sweating a lot.
Naomi is already changed and so is Blue. I change rather quickly and Blur fixes my hair.
I watch as my dad talks to Peridot's mom and step-dad. I really hope that nothing far too terrible happens. If not, then I'd have fueled everything up.
As I haven't done that yet.
The intermission ends but I'm not in the first or second song. I, however am the wife over there who gets humiliated by her husband and has to suck up her pride because I have to look like the cinnamon roll I am. But I have fun with the song. I mean, what's there not to love about being cheated on by your husband in your very own bed. What fun.
I just watch my dad and I have no fucking clue what goes on in my dad's head.
It's so fucking hard to fake cry and scream so realistically when my dad is in the fucking front row. It's embarrassing.
Everything after the Stay Alive Reprise is hard. I am forced to keep a straight face for It's Quiet Uptown. And I still have three fucking words.
I love Best of Wives and Best of Women. It's funny in a subtle way.
I feel very weird during The World Was Wide Enough. I have no idea how the real broadway actor does this every single time.
I leave every single person in tears with Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story. I almost cry myself but I hold myself together like the badass I am.
I just stand there as the ensemble finishes singing the end of the song. Every single person is in tears. I almost cry myself but I keep a straight face like the fucking badass I am.
We do the same thing we've done the last two days. Peridot and I are called out last.
Again he goes first, then the music changes. My heart beats faster as I walk out again and take Prince Charming's outstretched hand. I get the wildest screaming as I bow.
My dad and I walk home since our house isn't really that far. He tells me how much he liked the show and his favorite parts.
"Why don't you wear a dress more often?" he asks.
"I don't like dresses a lot. They make me sweat, " I tell him.
"But you wore five didn't you?" he points out.
"That was mandatory and it wasn't pleasant, " I contradict.
"I have recordings that say otherwise, " he shows me his phone. I smile. There is silence for a brief moment before he speaks again.
"Lesley Hillier, our young man's mother, is nothing like him, " he says. I try not to smack my dad like I do Peridot.
"Peridot said, she changed after marrying again, " I explain.
"And where is his real father?"
"He doesn't know, " I say, "He hasn't seen his dad since he was thirteen."
"It must have been rough. In all in all, he was still a child." I smile at my dad's words and understanding.
Holding the straps of my backpack, we continue to walk. When we arrive, my dad takes his keys and opens the door.
"I'm starving!" I exclaim as I plop down on the couch.
"You've been sweating the last two hours. Go shower, " my dad pulls me up.
"But my feet hurt, " I say.
"Lapis, I bet you're vocal chords must also hurt. So don't fight it, and go shower, " he tells me with so much sass, for a second he sounds more like one of my friends rather than my dad.
I groan but in the end say, "Fine."
I go to my room and take a shower. My mom comes home once I'm done taking a shower. I have no idea what my dad did, but he was able to get her to stay late and get himself out early.
I eat quickly and take my pill because she isn't in the best mood. Jane follows me quickly behind me when I go to my room.
As I brush my teeth, my phone rings. Of course, I immediately think it to be Peridot, but to my surprise, it's not. It's my dad who texted me everything he recorded of the show, which to my calculation, may be the entire show.
I send him a smiley face as I watch a few of them in the darkness before I go to sleep. Jane cuddled next to me putting her head on my head, I silently giggle.
I put my phone on the night stand next to my bed. Pulling the covers over myself, I feel hot but it's not like I give a fuck. I'm happy and excited and fucking proud and literally, nothing could ruin it.
Jane shifts but I don't give it much thought. Instead, I just close my eyes and try to sleep. Dancing and singing is tiresome as hell.
A hand covers my mouth.
"It's me, " Prince Charming whispers.
He removes his hand from my mouth.
"What the fuck are you doing here?" I whisper.
"Aren't you glad to see me?" he asks, putting one arm beneath me, holding my stomach, and his other hand on my shoulder. His words whisper into my hair.
"Are you drunk?" I ask him.
"I barely had a shot with Amethyst, " he rests his forehead on the back of my neck.
"Okay, maybe two or three, " he admits.
"You promised you would stop drinking, " I remind him.
"And I will keep my promise, mon amour. But I have to go slowly. Taking everything away in one go is far too drastic, " his hand drifts from my shoulder to my waist.
He simply holds me. If it weren't for me, he would have fallen asleep.
"You need to go, " I tell him.
He shifts, "But I've missed you."
I turn to look at him even though I can't completely see him through the dark.
"You saw me less than an hour ago, " I say.
"But I haven't spent enough time with you, " he complains.
"Your eyes, your skin, " he caresses my face, and then his thumb is on my bottom lip, "your lips."
Prince Charming kisses me without much warning. At first, it's fine. But then, I can barely breathe. I push him away, pushing his beside me.
"What the fuck?" I ask him.
"Sorry?" he smiles.
I rest my forehead on his chest as I silently laugh.
"Did you at least shower yet?" I ask him.
"I took a quick shower at Amethyst's, " he tells me.
I look at him and kiss him. Except this time, I'm not drowning inside of his mouth. His hands slip under my shirt, touching my bare back. Tender fingers outline my spine and backbone. My hands are at the side of his face, part of my fingers between his blond hair.
I'll let him stay. My parents don't have to find out. It could be just like last time. And I want him to stay if I'm being honest.
I want him to hold me, and to wake up beside him in the morning. Of course, without there being any sexual interactions. But that won't be a problem. All I want is to be in his arms, and all he wants is for me to be in them.
"You can stay, " I whisper through my jagged breaths.
"Lazuli, you've just made my night, " he whispers back.
He kisses me again, not stopping at my lips.
Before we arouse suspicion, I bury my head into his neck as he puts his arms around me. I fall asleep before he does.
Hello!
I know this is very late, but here it is. So far, it's the longest chapter I've written. 9,733 words to be exact.
But I have a valid excuse. You see...I'm in the midst of writing a book. An actual book-book. It's going to be my debut novel and it's a fantasy. That doesn't mean there's going to be unicorns and wise old wizards though. Though, I do live unicorns and wizards with complicated names.
The point it, I will finish this story because this story is a big part of my life. It's perhaps the first story I've taken seriously. I will continue to post one chapter a month though I'll try to get more in. But, do know, that if a chapter happens to come late, now you know why.
Have a great day/night! Depending on where you live!