"Wake up, wake up!" Abel pounces onto the bed, rocking me awake. "Mom, Dad, wake up!"

Negan inhales with a groan. "What? What is it?"

"It's Christmas!" Abel cheerfully exclaims. "Wake up!"

"Oof, watch it, kid," Negan grunts, "I've got ribs under all this flesh and blood."

"Sorry."

"What time is it?"

"Um...the little hand is on the five."

"You mean to tell me you're waking me up at five in the morning to open presents?"

"Yeah."

"Go back to bed. Wake me up in an hour."

"I can't go back to sleep, I'm too excited."

"Well, come lay down then." I mumble.

"I'll go wait in my new bed." He climbs over me and slides off the bed.

"Close the door, please."

The door shuts loudly. I can make out faint whispering from outside, which must mean he woke Jolyon up too.

"Jesus." Negan exhales.

I shift around in bed. "I thought you liked getting up this early."

"It's a holiday."

I snicker softly. "I told you the kids would be up early." I stretch. "The one day a year they're up before seven."

"Well, not this year," Negan turns over on his side, pulling most the blankets with him, "Daddy's tired as fuck."

I open my eyes, looking at his back. I tug on the quilt. "Well, no matter how tired, Daddy doesn't get to just hog the covers." I scoot closer to him, pulling the quilt over my shoulder. "Come on, give me some of it."

"How about I give you the whole thing?"

"Haha, I'm serious." I put my arm over him. "Asshole."

"You can't at least wait until your morning coffee to start calling me that?" He murmurs. "It is Christmas after all."

I breathe as I close my eyes. "I won't call you an asshole for the rest of the day; consider it my gift to you."

"Gee, thanks." He chuckles, before rolling on his back. "Move, so I can get my arm around you."

"What makes you think I want your arm around me?"

"Asshole."

"Hey, don't call me an asshole."

"Unlike your rude ass self, I actually got you a present, so I can call you whatever I damn well please."

"Try me," I dare him, "Call me anything you damn well please and see how that works out for you." His fingers graze my warm thighs. "How dare you even think of defiling me on this, the day our Savior's birth."

"I'm your savior."

"I'd rather be in peril."

He chuckles under his breath. "Move, you're squishing my arm."

"Oh, lord," I move just so he can ensnare me in his arm, "You're such a baby; Ow, you're squishing my arm."

"You just mocked me and I'm the fuckin' baby?"

"You get it."

He plants a tender kiss on my forehead...he then abruptly sneezes on me. I open my eyes, staring right at him in total disbelief. "Shit, sorry; some of your hair tickled my nose."

"Oh, so it's my fault you just expelled your snot all over me?"

"Don't you usually tie your hair up when you sleep at night?"

"You're such a dick."

"I thought you weren't gonna call me any names?"

"I said I wouldn't call you an asshole."

"Fair enough," He smiles, "I am sorry. It was an accident."

"I better not get sick."

"Nah, I'm healthy as a horse."

"Gross," I grumble. "And stop touching my thigh."

"I can't help it, your legs are warm."

"Could you stop?"

"Okay, okay."

I give him a look. "Quit squeezing my boob."

"My hands are cold."

"I'd let your hands get frostbite and break off before I'd let you lay here and fondle me in bed."

"You don't usually mind my roaming hands." He says, removing his hand from under my shirt.

"Since when have I ever enjoyed or got turned on by you titty honking me or groping my legs and ass?"

"I don't hear you bitching about it when we're getting frisky."

"I'm usually already in the mood by time you start doing that shit."

"Mm, so all I gotta do is get your motor running?"

"Both kids are awake out there."

"We can be quiet."

I roll my eyes. "What is it with you and always wanting to check my oil?"

"What can I say? You're a damn good ride."

"I'd slap you if I didn't set myself up for that." I tell him and he chuckles.

"I love you."

"I love whoever invented pop tarts," I retort, "Man, those things were good."

Negan laughs below his breath. "Your ribbing only makes me want you more."

"What do I say to reverse that?"

"I'm afraid there's not a fucking thing you could say to make me not want you," He moves my hair away from my eyes, "Or stop me from loving you; you're stuck with me, woman."

I smile sleepily. "Great, just great." His smile grows. I look him over. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry fuckin' Christmas." He says back as he starts to close his eyes.

"What? You're not gonna stuff my stocking?"

Negan opens one eye with a raise of his brow.

"I thought you had a yule log to stick in my chimney."

"You said the kids were awake."

"And you said we'd be quiet, so…" I lift up my brows.

Negan grins. "You naughty girl you." He leans over me and kisses me softly.

We swiftly get interrupted by a knock on the door. "Mom?"

Negan sighs against my shoulder. I scratch his head. "Yeah?"

"I'm kind of hungry." Abel says, opening the door.

Negan moves from being almost on top of me, pulling up the covers. "I thought we had talked about just entering a room like this."

"I knocked."

"Yeah, but we didn't say you could come in."

"Sorry."

I get out of bed. "Alright, I'm coming to make breakfast."

"When can we open presents?"

"Mmm...how about we wait until Lourdes gets here?"

"Aw, but she likes to sleep late!"

"Dude, we sleep until seven, too, which is not late."

"It is when you live on a farm." Negan puts his belts on.

"Can it." I tell him as I stretch. "Go wait for us outside."

"Okay." Abel walks back out, bringing the door to a close.

"Before you say anything, let me remind you for the millionth time that this is what it's like to have kids."

"Look at you reading minds." Negan chuckles.

I smile, mildly humored. The talk we had last night comes to mind. It's funny how easy it is to fall back. Frustrating, too.

"What's up?"

I look him in the eyes. "Hm?"

"You're staring at me with a blank look on your face.

"Oh…" I nod my head. I smile softly. "Just taking in the view."

"So, you're objectifying me?" Negan strolls over to me, snaking his arm around my lower back. "Somehow I'm okay with that coming from you."

I put my arms around him. "Try not to embarrass me today."

"Ah, it'll just be you, me, and the kids."

"And Lourdes...and maybe the Patels if you didn't scare them off."

"Still, they all know what to expect," He smiles, "I can let loose among friends, right?"

"Negan, you don't have friends and I'm serious."

"Alright, I'll be on my best behavior," He kisses the top of my head, "Times ten. Cross my heart."

"Thank you." I let him peck my lips.

…

While I make breakfast, I let the kids go through their stockings. I make a french toast casserole, which I personally don't care for, but the kid's love it, so I made it a Chrtismas tradition so they can enjoy it and I only have to eat it once a year. Negan exclaims that it smells good, probably because of the cinnamon and maple syrup, but I think he'll change his mind once he tastes it; the center is so soft and moist, it almost feels eggy texture wise.

He made coffee, which I guess was his idea of helping me, and then sat on the couch with a cup of joe with the kids. It makes his words of what I'll call encouragement for me sweating over a hot stove and oven super fucking annoying.

Lourdes comes into the house a little after seven. "Jesus," Her teeth chatter, "It's fucking cold out there."

"Do people ever stop bitching about the cold?"

"No." Lourdes replies, brushing off the snowflakes that fell on Cleo on the walk over. "Alright, shake it off."

Cleo shakes the cold off her pelt and then trots over to the kids. She barks when Abel stands up on the couch and he sits back down on his knees.

"Feliz Navidad, Lourdes!"

"Feliz Navidad, bebé." Lourdes shivers. "What'd you get for Christmas?"

"I don't know, Mom said we had to wait for you to get here."

"Wow, blame it on Lourdes," Lourdes hangs up her jacket, "Thanks, Pippa."

"You're welcome."

Lourdes glances over at Negan on the couch. "Need any help in the kitchen?"

"Por favor," I plead, "Dios sabe que no lo hará."

"Cabrón."

"Excuse me, but there's a ban on calling me an asshole," Negan informs Lourdes, "Given that it's a holiday. Don't think I don't know what that means; you called that plenty of times."

"Technically, the ban is on me calling you an asshole." I clarify.

"Oh, so I'm still okay to do it?"

"Go right ahead."

"Asshole." Lourdes calls Negan.

"Hey, that's not nice, Lourdes." Abel scolds her.

"Hey, your mom said I could. Feliz Navidad, Jol."

"Feliz Navidad."

"Are you gonna make empanadas?"

"Uh, does a bear poop in the woods?"

Abel laughs. "Yeah."

"Then you can bet your butt there will be empanadas for dinner."

"Yay!" Abel cheers, before turning toward me. "Is breakfast almost ready?"

"It's in the oven now, okay, eager mcbeaver?" I walk over in my pajamas. "Alright, let's open presents."

"Me first!" Cleo barks as Abel starts to rise up from sitting on the couch. "I'm sitting, jeez."

"She's keeping you safe."

"She's too bossy." Abel pets her head and she climbs up on the couch with him.

Negan reaches over and pets Cleo on the back, which gets her attention. "Damn, you and Simon really fought over this ugly thing? I've seen better fuckin' heads on a mug of root beer."

"So have I." Lourdes scoffs, looking him over.

"Hey, hey, let's not start arguing," I sit down on the floor by the tree, "Both Cleo and Negan are pretty, so let's shut up and open presents."

"Fine by me." Lourdes walks over to the coffee pot in the kitchen. "¿Fea? No lo creo."

I grab a present under the tree. "This one is for...Jolyon." I hand Jolyon the gift and then grab another. "And this one is for Abel."

Both boys open their gifts. "Socks?" Negan looks at me. "Really?"

"They needed them." I grab two more gifts, which are more clothes, which they do need.

"Wow, neat gifts, Mom."

I look over at Negan. "Do we need to have a talk in the bedroom?"

Negan zips his lips and smiles.

"Whoa, these socks are really thick." Abel sticks his hand inside.

I smile. "Let's hope it makes it harder for you to run holes in them."

Once all the boring gifts are out of the way, I give the kids their fun gifts. They each got some books, board games, and two puzzles. Abel got a new pair of shoes and some toy cars. Jolyon got a backpack and a pair of binoculars.

"Wow, you guys made out like bandits." I say, since Negan missed the opportunity to say a very dad thing to say.

"Aren't you going to open your gifts?"

"Yes, I was just-"

"Well, hold on, the kids still have gifts to open." Negan interrupts.

I look over at him, before scanning around me and the tree. "Oh, whoops, here they are."

"You were just saving the best for last."

I roll my eyes, before handing the boys their gifts from Negan. "Nice wrapping job; did your wives wrap these gifts for you?"

"I'm a fucking adult," Negan chuckles, "I know how to wrap presents."

"Mhm." I arch my brow.

"Whoa!" Abel stares down at the paper in awe.

"What is it, babe?"

"Yeah, show us." Lourdes encourages, sitting next to Jolyon on the bottom bunk.

Abel lifts up an orangy brown, worn leather baseball glove. "It's a glove!"

"Oh, wow." I say meekly.

"That way you won't feel left out when your brother and I toss a few outside." Negan says, smiling at Abel's obvious happiness over his gift.

Abel leans over and hugs Negan. "I love it."

Negan hugs him back. "You're welcome, kid."

I smile, admittedly a little touched. I could cry like a sap.

"What'd you get Jolly?" Lourdes asks, which prompts me to glance over for the answer.

Jolyon moves the paper away and when I see the sheathed knife I nearly gasp. What the holy fuck? He turns it around, before pulling it out of the leather sheath.

"You got him a hunting knife?" Lourdes scoffs.

"Sure did," Negan says, proud, "I figured since he's old enough to go on runs, he's old enough to have a proper knife."

I look at Negan in utter disbelief. "Can I see you in private for a moment?"

"What for?"

"Now." I get up from my spot.

"Mom." Jolyon pleads.

"Pip."

I look at both Lourdes and Jolyon. Jolyon looks like I'm about to ruin Christmas for him, while Lourdes flicks her eyes towards my other kid. When I glance over toward Abel, he's got those big puppy dog eyes, feeling the tension. Godammit.

I sigh, giving in. I look at Negan. "We'll talk about this later."

"Can I keep the knife?" Jolyon asks.

"I don't know, we'll see."

"But-"

"We'll discuss it later." I put my verbal foot down.

"You and Lourdes are next." Abel says.

"Okay…" I fish around for the gifts. "Here, Lourdes, the kids and I got this for you."

Lourdes opens the present. "Peanut brittle?"

"And brown sugar molasses brittle."

"Your favorite."Abel smiles.

Lourdes puts her hand over her heart. "Thank you, guys."

"We won't ask for any this time," Abel tells her, "You don't have to share."

"I wasn't planning on it, but thank you." She sets the tin we put it in aside. "Pip, yours is behind you."

"Oh, okay." I reach around for the package. I wrap it. "Oh...wow."

"Aren't they cool?" She smiles. "They're like the pair you used to have before the change."

I inspect the pair of sunglasses. "Yeah."

"I found them a month ago," Lourdes says, delighted, "I figured since you're the jefe around here, you should have some badass shades."

"Thanks, Lour." I smile. "I wish I would have gotten you something better now."

"Nah, I'll freeze most of this and feed off it for months."

"Try 'em on." Abel says.

"Okay." I put on the sunglasses.

"You look cool, Mom."

"Aw, thank you." I chuckle, taking off the glasses.

"Yeah, real cool." Negan chimes in. I flip him the bird.

"You and Lourdes open the gift from me and Jol."

"Jol y yo." Lourdes corrects his grammar.

"Jol and I."

"You want to, or should I?"

"Go ahead."

I open the gift from the boys. It's a wooden picture frame with a picture of the four of us and the Patels...and my father. It's a photo from way back; Nanda found a polaroid camera and wanted to take a group picture. Abel's only a baby here. I feel tears start to water in my eyes.

"Let me see." Lourdes puts her hand out. I give it to her and she looks it over. "Oh, look at how small you both were."

I wipe a tear from my face. Negan looks at me funny. He wiggles his fingers. "Let me have a look at that."

Lourdes hands him the frame and he glances down at the picture. His eyes focus on the photo but I can't tell what he's thinking. None of us can.

I clear my throat, getting his attention. "Are we all done with presents?"

Negan swallows, sitting up. "Uh, no, I got you a little something but it can wait till later."

"We got Dad something."

"Oh, yeah, where's it at?"

"Over there." Abel gets off the couch and pads to the other side of the tree. He picks up the poorly wrapped gift and brings it over to Negan. "Here; it's from Jol and me."

"Yo."

"I." Abel shyly waits for Negan to open it.

"Aw, you kids didn't have to get me anything." Negan unwraps the present. The paper drops at his feet and he's left holding a white, glazed slightly misshapen ceramic mug with black speckles. "Oh, wow, look at this; an official dad mug."

"Look inside." Abel points to the inside of the mug. "Gemma and Kirk let us write something on the inside."

Negan tips the mug his way to read whatever's on the inside. Abel comes over to sit on my lap. I kiss his temple, waiting for Negan to read the message aloud. But, his smile starts to disappear until his mouth comes to a complete close.

"Jolyon wrote it, because his handwriting is better than mine and I can't really spell."

Negan nods his head. He sets the mug down on the table and gets up from the couch. He walks out of the house without a word, leaving all of us here in bewilderment.

"What the hell?" Lourdes is the first to speak.

"Maybe he didn't like it." Abel meekly says.

I look at the mug. I pat Abel's arm. "Hand me the mug, baby."

Abel walks over to the table, picks up the mug, and hands it to me. I glance down in the mug, where at the bottom is the message: We're glad we found you, Dad. - J + A.

"What's it say?" Lourdes asks me.

I turn my head, meeting eyes with Jolyon. I hand him the mug to pass to Lourdes before I get up from the floor. "Watch the oven, Lour."

I slide on my boots, hastily tying them and throwing on my jacket before going out the door. I look around in front of me and down each side of the street, before flowering the trail in the snow towards the back of the house. I round the corner and find Negan by the empty clothesline, sitting on the side of the bathtub with his back facing me.

I march over, crunching the twelve inches of powder as I make my path. "If you catch your death out here, you should know; I will take over the Saviors."

His head slightly turns at my voice. "You'd have to fight Simon for it."

"I can take him." I stop once I reach him. "Whatcha doin' out here? Building a snowman?"

Negan sniffs, but doesn't reply. He was obviously shedding a few tears before he realized I was here.

"What's the matter?" I ask him. "Didn't you like your gift?"

"Yeah, I did," He looks down, "Who knew kids could be so thoughtful?"

I pull the necklace Jolyon had gotten me for Christmas years ago from inside my shirt. "I did."

He smiles, melancholy. He sniffs again.

"You came out in the cold just to cry so we wouldn't see you?" I lightly tease. "What a pussy."

"Shut the fuck up." Negan chuckles. His face grows somber again. "It was a nice gift."

I nod my head. "The kids aren't gonna think less of you for crying."

"I know that."

"Then why are you out here?"

"I don't know, I just...it still feels weird as fuck."

"What does?"

"Being a dad," He tells me, "Getting gifts from my kids, frosting cookies with 'em, and watching 'em open presents by the tree...makes you kind of wish the world wasn't the way it is now."

I smile. "There'll be more Christmases, Negan."

"Yeah, but what about birthdays and all those markers of growing up like losing your first tooth or learning how to ride a bike?" He asks me with a sad look on his face. "How am I supposed to catch all that two hours away? I've already missed a shit ton, Pippa."

"We've been over this, Negan," I touch his arms, "We will figure it out. You and me."

Negan sniffs. "You and I."

I chuckle. "Real cute." I point my finger at him. "Don't think you and I aren't going to talk about Jolyon's gift."

"Oh, come, I think he's old enough for something bigger than that boy scout toothpick he's got now."

"A hunting knife?"

"It's only a six inch blade."

"He's eight."

"If this were the old world, I'd see your point, but it's not," Negan says, "Jolyon's a mature kid; he's not gonna go waving it around the place like an idiot. Come on, let him keep it."

I glare at him, somewhat playful. "We'll see." I start to walk. "Come on; I'm freezing my tits off out here."

Negan laughs, his breath bursting into the air. "I bet if your t-shirt wasn't so loose, we'd be able to see your nipples pointing the way home."

"God, you're such a child." I groan as he puts his arm around me.

We go back into the warm house, where Abel's cleaning up the wrapping paper while Lourdes takes the french toast casserole out of the oven and Jolyon sets the table.

"Thank God," Negan says, watching Lourdes close the oven door, "I could eat a fuckin' horse I'm so goddamn hungry."

"Go help Jol set the table." I roll my eyes.

"Sorry you didn't like your gift." Abel says, getting both of us to look over. "We didn't know what else to get you."

Negan looks over, as if he doesn't know what to say. He exhales. "I did like it, Abel, I...love it, actually. It was the best gift I could have asked for."

"Really?"

"Yeah, fuckin' really," Negan says, looking toward Jolyon, "Thank you both."

"Can I hug you?" Abel asks him.

Negan snickers, putting out his hands. "Yes, and I'm you're dad; you don't have to ask."

Abel smiles, getting off the couch and running over and hugging his dad. He waves Jolyon over. "Come on, Jol."

Jolyon sheepishly stands by a chair at the table.

Negan motions him over with his head. "Bring it in."

Jolyon walks over. Negan lets go of Abel and he and Jolyon look at one another for a moment. He then smiles and brings Jolyon in for a hug. "I love you, kid."

Jolyon glances up at him. I can tell he's bashful. "Um, you, too."

Negan chuckles, mussing Jolyon's hair, before sighing; "Alright, I call first plate. I am the guest afterall."

I roll my eyes, smiling. I blink, setting my eyes on Jolyon. I smile at him and he smiles faintly back.

…

The rest of the day goes pretty perfectly in my opinion. We mostly stayed indoors where it was nice and toasty, eating cookies instead of lunch some time after breakfast. Abel got Negan to build a snowman which led to a snowball fight that Lourdes and I didn't ask to be a part of but had to finish with only mercies toward the kids.

Everyone's been celebrating all week, so I didn't feel guilty having fun with my family, Negan specifically, or worry about being given the evil eye. No one cared, in fact, the Saviors haven't been shitty to anyone from what I've had reported back to me, so that alone lowers my blood pressure.

The romp in the snow left everyone tired as hell, so as soon as we all got in and warm again, everybody picked a spot and fell asleep. Lourdes took the arm chair, Jolyon drifted off on Abel's bunk, while Abel laid against me on the couch. Negan put his boots on the table and nodded off beside me with his arm around the back of the couch.

After some time, I'm awaken by Cleo whining and nudging my leg. When I open my eyes to her she stampers and walks around my legs and under Negan's to lead me to the door. I stretch my back and neck a little and then carefully slip out from under Abel. I grumble under my breath as Cleo does the impatient I-have-to-pee dance, glaring over at Lourdes for evidently being unwakeable.

I open the door and Cleo bolts out the door. I shut the door behind me and look over for her. She pees over by the snowman they built, yellowing the snow a little. After she's done that, she trots around a little. I brush off some snow on the bench outside my house and sit, waiting for the dog.

"Come on, football head." I bounce my knees a little to keep myself warm.

"Hey."

I turn my head. "Oh, hey, D."

Dwight comes moseying up the street with a brown bottle in his hand. "How come you're not inside?"

"Should I be?"

He shrugs his shoulders. "It's cold out and it's Christmas."

I nod, watching what now looks like a stagger. "My family's taking a holiday snooze right now," I say, "So was I until the dog needed to be let out."

Dwight notices the dog over in the snow. "Oh."

I look him over. "Shouldn't you be...I don't know, hanging out with your friends or whatever?"

He chuckles drunkenly. "I don't have friends."

"What about your little girlfriend?"

"She's...somewhere over that way, I'm sure."

I smirk. "Wanna sit down for a minute?"

"I shouldn't." He says, taking a swig from the bottle.

"Why not?" I ask him. "We don't know each other; just two strangers on a bench, you and I."

He scoffs, mildly humored. "Um, sure, alright."

He comes over and plops down on the bench beside me. He takes another drink of what I now know is beer. He tilts the bottle my way.

"Want any?"

I look at him with knitted brows. The innocent, inebriated expression on his face tells me that he just isn't thinking clearly. "No, I can't. Thanks."

"Okay," Dwight goes to take another drink but pauses, "Oh! Shit, I'm sorry. I forgot you-"

"It's okay." I sigh, watching my breath curl out like smoke.

"What'd you get for Christmas?"

"My kids got me a nice frame for the only picture we have and my friend got me a pair of sunglasses."

"Oh, nice." He says as he sets down the bottle. He fishes a pack of cigarettes out of his shirt pocket. "What'd Negan get you?"

"Don't know, he hasn't given it to me yet," I watch Cleo run hog wild around in the snow in her non-water proof sweater Ravinder knitted for her, "Said he'd give it to me later."

"Huh." Dwight lights his cigarette.

"Do you know what it is?"

"Nope," He exhales smoke, "Can't say that I do."

I nod. "Sherry didn't mention anything?"

"Why would she know?"

I shrug my shoulders. "Negan's never really struck me as the kind of guy to be good at picking out thoughtful gifts for women; figured maybe he had one of them do it."

"One of them?"

"His wives," I clarify, "If he's not keeping them around for sex anymore than he must making them do something for him."

Dwight scoffs, chuckling to himself.

"What?"

He goes to say, but when his eyes meet mine, his smile dwindles. His eyes also look down, before he turns his head, taking another drag. "Nothing."

"Nothing?"

He exhales slowly. "Yeah, nothing."

I feel a pit in my stomach. "Tell me."

Dwight glances back at me, looking me over.

"Please."

His eyes draw downward again. He shrugs his shoulders. "I just thought it sounded a little beneath you is all."

"What?"

"The way you talked about his wives...seemed a little bitter of you."

I scoff. "I am not bitter."

"Okay."

I roll my eyes, but I can't help chuckling.

"What?"

"Nothing, it just kind of sounded like those little spats we'd get into when we were young."

"Oh, yeah."

I peer over at the dog again. The nauseating feeling hasn't gone away.

"Dwight, I know we haven't seen each other in years and you have no reason to be loyal to me or tell me the truth, but...you'd tell me the truth if I asked for it, wouldn't you?"

He looks over at me.

"Even if it hurt like a hell, you'd tell me?"

Dwight's eyes study me.

"Wouldn't you?"

He sighs through his nose. "What do you want to know?"

I stare for a moment, before I look back at Cleo trotting up to the bench. I can't ask; I can't be that jealous woman and ask. "Nothing, I was just wondering."

Cleo barks as she reaches the bench, putting her front paws on me as she begs for pets.

"Girl," I bemoan, petting her head, "You're getting your muddy paws all over me."

Dwight smiles, reaching over to pet her. "This Simon's dog?"

"This is Lourdes' dog, Cleo."

"He wouldn't shut up about it when he came back empty-handed."

"If he cared about her, he wouldn't have left her with Lourdes and taken off."

"He said she stole her from him."

"I was there and trust me, he walked out the door without her when she hesitated to leave Lourdes who was distraught." I let her get up in my lap when she jumps up, despite her clearly not being a lap dog. "Besides, that was then, this is now and he has no claim to her, isn't that right?"

Cleo barks and we laugh. "Far be it from me to say Simon's not an asshole."

"Anyone who says otherwise needs their head examined." I chuckle with him.

Dwight drops the cigarette in the snow. "I should probably find Laura."

"Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, Pippa."

I smile as he walks off. I pat Cleo on the back and start to rise from the bench. "Alright, let's go inside."

When we go back in, Cleo runs over to Lourdes, leaping up in her lap and immediately waking her up.

"Cleo!" Lourdes complains. "Your sweater is soaking wet!" She looks down at her lap. "And you're muddy!"

"She needed to go out to potty." I say, hanging up my coat.

Lourdes takes off Cleo's sweater. "Go sit on the rug by the heater. ¡Vamos!"

Cleo lays down on the rug closest to the furnace, laying her head down between her paws.

"We should probably get dinner started soon."

"Are the Patels coming over?"

"I think so," I peek over at Negan, "Hopefully last night didn't scare them off. Rav said she was making samosas. I think Nanda is making something, too."

Lourdes huffs. "But I'm making empanadas."

"So?"

"So, why is Ravinder making samosas?!"

"Um...because samosas are good."

"It's too much like empanadas."

"It is not."

She crosses her arms, pouting. "They're both savory pastries."

"Yeah, but they're not filled with the same thing. Why are we arguing about this? We're having a nice, family meal that everyone is contributing to; shut up and enjoy the fact that we don't have to cook a turkey."

"Yeah…"

Negan wakes up, probably because of our little argument.

"Careful, the dog's under your feet."

He looks down, puzzled and still half asleep. "What time is it?"

"We should have gotten you a watch for Christmas," I hover over him from behind the couch, "It's two o'clock on the nose." I gently tap the tip of his nose with my finger like a wand.

He snickers. "Did I overhear the mentions of dinner?"

"That you did, my boy," I smirk, "But don't expect any turkey or stuffing, because neither are on the menu."

"Well, fuck this shit, I'm leaving."

"There's the door." I move towards the kitchen.

He chuckles. "Need any help?"

"I needed help at breakfast, where were you then?"

"Hanging out with the kids."

"Sitting on your ass is more like it," I retort, "What do you know about cooking anyway?"

"You may fucking recall that I made you breakfast in bed once or twice."

"Anyone can pour Bisquick in a pan."

"Those were from scratch and you damn well fucking know it." Negan gets up from the coach, minding the dog, "Seriously, what can I do?"

"You know how to make sweet potatoes with brown sugar and marshmallows?"

"I'm sure it can't be too hard."

"Good, start with cleaning and peeling those sweet potatoes over there. "

"What's on the menu?"

"Lourdes is making empanadas, Rav's making samosas, I believe Nanda's making some type of curry, and you and I are going to make sweet potatoes, green bean casserole, and rolls."

"What no meat?"

"Lourdes' empanadas will have beef in them."

"What's for dessert?"

"Pumpkin pie, duh."

"What sort of shit show Christmas dinner is this?" He asks with a grin. "It's all starch and carbs."

"There will be vegetables."

"What? In a casserole and pasty?"

"This isn't a Norman Rockwell painting," Lourdes argues, "Get over it."

"Again, you know where the door is."

"Yikes, alright, I'll shut up," He chuckles, "Though, I gotta say…"

"You don't have to say."

"It is kind of a turn on to have two women, one which I used to fuck and the other I'm currently fucking, go off on me like this."

"Out." I point to the door. "Go outside and don't come back in until you learn proper conversation etiquette."

"What? You want me to freeze to death?"

"I do." Lourdes says.

"Out!"

"What if I say I'm sorry?" He asks. "Real genuine like?"

"You're never genuine." Lourdes shakes her head.

"Oh, come on," He looks over, beseeching, "Pip?"

I shoot him a pair of daggers, before rolling my eyes. "Fine, but only because it's Christmas."

"God fuckin' bless you," He quips, looking me up and down, "Every part."

…

Christmas dinner went over well, way fucking better than the night before. Negan surprisingly checked his teasing and jokes at the diner table. The Patel sisters did show up with their dishes and a kids card game for the boys as a gift. Lour and I got them each something small; a pair of overalls for Ravinder and a sweater for Nanda.

After dinner and pie, the girls go home and about an hour later, so does Lourdes. Negan wasn't planning on staying an extra night, but all of the Saviors he brought with him got too drunk to drive home, so they're all staying. Abel proposed that Negan stay until the new year, but Negan obviously can't do that.

I needed to take a walk after all that food, so I stepped out to walk Cleo for Lourdes, while Negan attempts to put Abel to bed. The cold nips my nose and cheeks but I kind of like it. The air smells of smoke from a few chimneys and the aroma of what must be some amazing home cooked meals. The air, of course, also smells of spilled alcohol from all the celebrating. I swear there's some truth to what Negan always says; I can smell alcohol like a goddamn bloodhound. Even after years of sobriety. Maybe I just have a good sniffer.

I smile at the sound of some drunken, near incoherent song being sung by a mix of Saviors and Halcyonians. I really thought the Saviors would be rigid or too good to associate with my people, but I've gotta say I'm impressed. It could just be the alcohol, but then again I haven't heard of any fights or other types of trouble.

Cleo steers off from our path to get up on the boardwalk. A trail of smoke wisping into the air reveals a dark stranger leaning against the post. As I come closer, I realize it isn't a stranger, but Martin.

"Hey, cowboy."

He looks my way. "Howdy."

I glance into the window of the place behind him. I see a bunch of raised arms holding glasses swinging along with a song. "What are they singing exactly?"

Martin looks over his shoulder. "I think it's Santa Clause is Coming to Town, but it might also be that anthem from Animal Farm."

I snicker. "Why aren't you in there with 'em?"

"I didn't feel like drinking so bad my kidneys hurt the next morning."

I shrug. "Good reason."

"Besides, if none of us are sober, who'd make sure some idiot doesn't choke on his own vomit?"

"Ah, the designated nurse," I joke, "Very responsible of you."

Martin takes a hit from his cigarette. "Why aren't you with your kids?"

"Geez, people just love to judge moms for cutting the umbilical cord. Negan's putting them to bed, while I walk off dinner."

He nods his head. "How was your little family Christmas?"

"It was...surprisingly nice." I step up on the steps. "The kids enjoyed it, that's what's important." I peer through the window again. "And we haven't hadn't conflict, which is all we can ask for I suppose."

"Yeah…"

"I saw the thing you made for Ravinder," I look back at Martin, "That was really sweet."

He shrugs. "That's me; big 'ol sweetheart."

I smile. "Wanna hear something funny?"

"It better be funny."

I bite my lip, reconsidering. "...Hm, nevermind. It's not all that funny, if anything it's really awkward and embarrassing."

"Well, now you have to tell me what it is."

"No."

He looks me over. "Okay, if you say so." He puts his cigarette up to his lips.

I stand there, staring at him. I take another peek into the window. "Lourdes thought...that the real reason you came to ask was because you were fishing for ideas for me." Martin looks at me. A laugh rises up in me and I let it breathe. "Shit, that sounds even dumber the second time around."

"Yeah, it does some sound dumb." He says, exhaling smoke.

"Yeah…" I mouthe, a little embarrassed that I told him.

He reaches into the inside of his jacket. "Like I don't know you well enough to know what to get you." He extends his arm out. "Here."

I look at whatever's between his fingers. "What is this?" I take the package.

"A gift."

I unwrap the small gift. "Marty, you didn't have to get me anything."

"I know, but I saw this a few weeks back on a run and I thought of you."

It's a small box. I peel the tape off the top and slide the rattling sound into my palm. I'm stunned, looking down at the golden necklace. A thin chain with an imperfect rectangular pendant looped through it. "Oh, wow…"

I look at the pendant, smoothing my thumb over it. In the center is what looks like an angel pouring a cup into another cup. "Is this a tarot card?"

"Yeah, cool, huh?"

I squint looking further at the writing. "Temperance?"

"Yeah, I found it in one of those psychic shops."

"Why were you in one of those?"

"Same reason I'd go to any other store; to find supplies."

I nod my head, looking back down at the pendant.

"I asked Ravinder, because she's the only one who would know shit like this."

"Right."

"Right, and she said it means balance, harmony, and alchemy, which I guess is like transformation, combination, and creation, according to Rav." He drags from his cigarette, "I thought it was cool and it reminded me of you."

"Why because I'm an alcoholic and this is Temperance?"

He smiles. "Because when there's chaos you step in and balance it out."

I scoff. "I think I've caused more chaos these last couple months than anything."

"But it's all turned out okay because of you and what you're willing to do for us...and I may have thought of you because of the cups and Temperance and all, too, but that doesn't mean the rest isn't true."

I snicker. "Thanks...this was...this was really sweet."

"Ah, it's nothing, really."

"No, it's not nothing," I argue, "This is really cool and thoughtful."

"I'm glad you like it." He says, smiling a little as he takes another drag from his cigarette.

I bite my lip. "About the other night…" Martin glances over. "Um, are we cool? You know, after what happened?"

He exhales into the night. "You mean when we kissed?"

I side glance the raucous noise. "Yeah."

Martin shrugs. "Yeah, we're cool," His eyes meet mine, "Why wouldn't we be?"

"Because I...I don't know. I just…" I exhale, shaking my head. "Nevermind."

Martin nods his head, going back to smoking. He looks down with an arch of his brow as Cleo whines at our feet. "You clever devil."

He reaches into his pocket and pulls out something wrapped in tin foil. He unfolds the foil and tosses her a piece of bacon. Cleo catches the scrap and eats it down. Martin pets her head when she wags her tail.

"No, that's all you get."

"You make it a habit of carrying bacon in your pocket?"

"Not usually," He snickers back, "Jessie gave me some earlier this morning and I sort of forgot I had until now."

"Gross." I laugh.

"What? It's been in tin foil?"

We laugh together. My laughter dies down a few seconds before his and I get to see him before he sees me. There's something admirable about Martin; hell, there's dozens of admirable things about Martin.

He looks over. "What?"

I shake my head. "Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas."

"I gotta take Cleo home."

"Yeah."

"Night."

"Night, Temperance."

I roll my eyes with a smile. "Night," I say again, "Make sure no one starts any trouble."

"You have my word."

I whistle for Cleo and we head off. I take a look over my shoulder when I'm a few feet away. He waves and I nod back, before carrying on.

When Cleo's home, I go home myself. The darkness from the windows, save for a small light somewhere in the house, hopefully means Abel is asleep for the night. I enter very quietly and, thank god, both kids are asleep.

"Mom?" Or so I thought.

I look over, making Jolyon out in the dark on the top bunk. "Hey, punk. Did you have a good Christmas?"

"Yeah," He says, genuine, "Did you?"

"I did," I kick off my boots, "I loved the gift you and your brother got me."

"You're welcome."

I snicker, tired. "I'm glad you had a good day."

"Do I get to keep my knife?"

"We'll discuss that in the morning."

I walk to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth. Once that's over with, I wish Jolyon goodnight and enter the lit bedroom, closing the door behind me.

"Boy, aren't you just inconvenienced that your men got so drunk you couldn't go home?"

Negan looks over, hands behind his head as he's made himself comfortable on my bed. "Fucking furious."

I scoff through my nose, walking over to the dresser. I yawn, "I'm tired."

"Yeah, so am I." He yawns back.

I guffaw. "What are you so tired about? You cut out halfway between making the sweet potatoes, so you could play that card game with the kids."

"Still was a long ass day," He chuckles, "And in my defense, the only reason I stopped was because I nicked my finger on the blade and had to clean it." He holds up his bandaged finger.

I roll my eyes, coming over to the bed. "You poor baby."

"I know." He says. "Damn, you're beautiful."

"Am I?"

"You sure fuckin' are," Negan retorts, "Even with those goofy ass pajamas."

"A pair of flannel bottoms and a t-shirt is goofy?" I arch my brow as I put my hair up. "What would you have me wear? Nothing?"

"Ideally."

"You are such an…"

"Asshole? Is that what you were about to say?"

I lick my lips. "As a matter of fact, I was, but then I wouldn't have gotten you anything for Christmas."

"Oh, shit, that reminds me," Negan leans over the side of his bed, "I almost forgot I got you something."

I peek over his shoulder, watching as he fishes something out of his jacket. "What is it?"

"Close your eyes." He rolls back over. "Go on, shut 'em."

I close my eyes and put out my hand, because I'm assuming that's the next instruction. He drops something in the palm of my hand.

"Alright, open 'em."

I open my eyes and they widen at the small black velvet box in the palm of my hand. I sharply inhale and shove it toward him. "Here, take it back."

"What? No, open it."

"No," I quickly drop the box on his leg, "I don't want it."

"Really?" Negan raises his brow. "You don't even know what it is?"

"I've got a hunch and I don't want it."

"Pip, you're being stupid," He offers me the box again, "Just open the damn box."

I look him in the eye and he raises both brows, waiting. I sigh, frustrated, but I take the box back and open it. In the dead center, is a small, thin golden band with a puny little deep blue stone encircled in a gold trim. It looks like the night sky captured.

I look up at him. "What is this?"

"A ring, what's it fucking look like?" Negan chuckles. "Jesus, what's with the fucking pouty scowl on your face? You'd think I got you a knitting needles."

I gaze back down at the ring. "Where did you get this?"

"I get first pick of everything."

I look up. "This isn't something you took off your wives, is it?"

"Nope, they've got enough crap; I didn't even offer it to 'em."

"Then...from the quarters."

"No, Jesus, Pippa," Negan pinches the bridge of his nose, frustrated, "It was handed over to me and I stuck it in my bedside drawer for you personally. Goddamn, why the hell did I think you'd be grateful?"

My eyes admire the ring. It is beautiful and small, not like the rings I've seen his wives where which aren't really any bigger than this but still possess some kind of gaudiness to them.

"You don't like it."

"I didn't say that."

"So, do you like it?"

"Yes, I mean no...I don't know."

"Well, which fucking is it, Pip?"

I sigh through my nose, before I meet his eyes. "What is this?"

"We've been over this."

"No, I mean, why are you giving me this ring? What's it for? What does it mean?"

"Oooh!" Negan grins, amused. "You thought it was an engagement ring? Like I'm fucking proposing to you?"

I feel my cheeks simmer, unsure if it's from anger or humiliation. "So, you're not proposing to me?"

"No," He answers, "Not unless you want me to."

I shake my head. "Then what is it for?"

"Consider it a deal."

"Meaning?"

"Well, it was just gonna be a nice gift, but after our little chat last night, I got to thinking," Negan explains, "And I want things between our communities to change. I want it to be what we agreed on before I-"

"Lied to me with a bold face?"

"I was gonna say 'wasn't entirely honest', but sure," He goes on, "I want our communities to work with each other."

"What about the debt? And the protection payments?"

Negan bites the corner of his lip. "If you and your people agree to work with the Saviors, I see no reason all of that can't be lifted."

I furrow my brows. "You're serious?"

"I am," He nods, "You're people are strong and, despite a few tiny hiccups, cooperative and easy to work with. My men have given good reports back whenever you've sent people to the Sanctuary. Hell, I fuckin' like your guys; they keep their heads down and get shit done more efficiently than my guys half the time."

"So...you want us to merge with the Saviors?"

"Think of it as a reward for all your hard work," Negan touches my knee, "I think our people could be useful to one another."

"Useful how?"

"What was it that you wanted from the get go? For us to establish trade and community. Well, I want to give you that."

"All because I said I didn't know if you and I could make it?"

Negan's face grows gloomy. "I want to make things work with you, Pippa. Whether that means business or the two of us, I'll put in the work, if you will. I want you and the boys close and what you said last night made me realize that the tension between our deal was jeopardizing that."

I stare at the ring again. "And you think giving me a ring will...put all this forward?"

"No, the ring is sort of part of it but also a promise."

"A promise?"

"Yeah," His fingers close around mine, "That this will work and with us working together instead of pulling out our dicks to compare sizes, we can maybe be together."

"Together? As in…?"

"As in I get rid of my wives, respectfully, and you and I can finally be together the way we both had hoped when we were out looking for each other."

"Like a family?"

"Right on the nose."

"How would we do that?" I ask, perplexed. "We still have the same responsibilities. Two hours away."

"We'll cross those bridges when we get to 'em; we don't have to have all the answers right now. You don't even have to wear that ring until you think I've made good on everything I've said to you...until I've proven myself to you because I know I've let you down."

I look at him. His face is serious.

"I have let you down, Pippa, and instead of saying sorry, I wanna prove myself to you."

Fucking hell. Tears start to form in my eyes.

"What do you say?" Negan uses his thumb to brush a tear from my cheek, chuckling mildly. "Wanna give it a shot with me?"

A smile breaks across my face. I can't help but chuckle as Negan's bright smile forms.

"Is that a yes?"

I put my hands on his face as I kiss him. I then clear the tears from my eyes, sniffling. "Yes, I agree to try your little plan."

Negan smiles wide, kissing me. "I love you, Pippa."

"I love you, too." I glance at the ring, remembering the box in my hand.

"You don't have to put it on."

"I know," I pluck the ring from the box, studying it, "I've just...never had a ring on my finger before."

"So put it on then."

I slip the ring on my finger. I flex my hand, staring at the ring, trying to figure out how I feel about it.

"Looks nice."

My eyes pick up to Negan.

"What?"

I bite my lip. "Take off your clothes."

Negan's grin picks up. "Am I getting laid?"

I climb over to his side, straddling him. My hands take his face, I smile, and kiss his lips.

Thanks for reading! Hope you all enjoy!