I suppose I could have worded the author's notes more clearly last time - some of you thought this was over! XD
We're not far from that point - there's only one more script after this. 7-23, 7-24, and 7-25 have been the most heavily rewritten of the episodes since "Ice Shack," which started this all. Original material is where I'm most concerned about matching the tone of the show and the voice of the characters, so here's hoping that comes through.
SHOW TITLE
INT. FORMAN KITCHEN - DAY
It's a beautiful morning to have breakfast to, and ERIC, DONNA, and HYDE are all in the middle of a fabulous bacon/egg/French toast breakfast at the kitchen table. BOB and KITTY talk by the stovetop, where Kitty has fresh plates of bacon and toast waiting.
Eric and Donna have a brochure unfolded between them that they read while they eat.
DONNA:
Eric, this apartment is even better than the one we were going to get the first time we planned on going away together. Can you believe it?
ERIC:
(mock doubt)
Hmm... I don't know, Donna – it may be nice, but can it hold up to the mobile home we almost had?
Donna gives him an exaggerated "ah."
DONNA:
You know, that is a good point. We really should see if there's anything with bedroom, kitchen, and bathroom all crammed into the size of a minivan.
They share a smile and turn back to the brochure.
BOB:
(to Donna)
Well, I'm just happy you're finally going to college, cupcake. It's about time you used your potential. You may not end up the president of a company or anything, on account of you're a gal, but you'll make one hell of a secretary.
DONNA:
Dad, I'll be studying to become a rock journalist.
BOB:
(shrugs)
Either way, we'll get our money's worth out of those typewriter lessons you took when you were nine.
He grabs a handful of bacon and starts working on it as he exits through the patio door.
DONNA:
God, just three more days.
(to Eric)
What's the first thing you wanna do once we get to Madison?
ERIC:
You know, I've actually been thinking of what I still wanna do here before we leave. I mean, we're finally getting out, so if there's anything we still wanna do in Point Place, it's now or never.
Kitty looks up from the French toast.
KITTY:
Ooh! I have an idea – how about we all spend more time with your mother? Some antique shopping, some macramé classes, and to really top it all off, how about we don't go off to Madison and leave her all alone?
ERIC:
Mom, I'm going. I know I've said that before – twice – but you know what they say – "third time's a charm."
Kitty tuts, crosses over with the plate of French toast, and sets it in the center of the kitchen table.
KITTY:
Oh, honey, I'm just teasing. Of course, you and Donna have to go. And besides – I won't be left all alone.
She steps behind Hyde and catches him off-guard with a hug and a kiss to the top of the head.
KITTY (cont'd):
It paid to take in an orphan, didn't it?
(laughs)
Oh, Steven, I signed Schatzi up for a doggy obedience school next month, and I want you to come with us to the classes. You're the only person Schatzi listens to about yapping at other dogs or attacking the Andersons' Great Dane.
She exits into the living room, all smiles.
Hyde looks down at his breakfast, avoiding Eric and Donna's stares.
ERIC:
You haven't told my parents you're going to Chicago with Jackie at the end of the month, have you?
HYDE:
No, I haven't.
Red enters from the living room, dressed for work at the muffler shop.
RED:
Oh, Steven, glad I caught you – your dad called last night. Said you should get to work early. He's got some big plans for the future of the store he wants to go over with you.
He exits out the patio door.
DONNA:
(to Hyde)
You didn't tell your dad you're leaving either, did you?
HYDE:
No, I didn't.
ERIC:
Huh. Well, you're probably not gonna have fun the next three days, are you?
HYDE:
No, I'm not.
Eric and Donna give exaggerated nods as Hyde keeps at his breakfast.
MAIN CREDITS
BUMPER
INT. FORMAN BASEMENT - DAY
Shortly after breakfast. The empty basement is soon filled by Hyde, coming in from his room with a fresh shirt. He's about to exit out the basement door when it opens, and he's confronted by a grimacing KELSO and FEZ.
They advance into the basement, backing Hyde up against the far wall.
KELSO:
Well, well. Look who it is. Do you see who it is, Fez?
FEZ:
Oh, I see who it is.
KELSO:
Yeah, it's our former good buddy, Hyde. Who was formerly going to stick around when Eric and Donna and Jackie all left. But I guess that was formerly.
He and Fez turn their heads in toward one another, even as they both keep glaring at an unfazed Hyde.
HYDE:
Every day, you two get closer to turning into full-on chicks.
KELSO:
Man, how can you bail on us like this? We knew Donna was gonna go off to college sooner or later, and we figured Eric would go with her even if he didn't have anything going on -
FEZ:
And it was a good bet he wouldn't – that one surprised us.
KELSO:
Yeah, but he does. And Jackie, she was always gonna get something good in TV, 'cause she's hot, but you? You don't have anything going on in Chicago. You just wanna go 'cause you love Jackie and wanna be with her. That is so selfish!
He stomps his foot, for a full measure of "whiny man-child." Fez takes a step in toward Hyde.
FEZ:
You didn't think, did you? How this would affect your friends? Those you leave behind?
HYDE:
Come on, man. It's not that far a drive to Chicago. Anytime you wanna hang out -
KELSO:
It's not that. If you go, we lose the basement!
HYDE:
What?
KELSO:
With Eric going away, we were counting on you still being here so Red would let us keep using the basement to hang out! But now that his son and his orphan are both leaving, he's gonna lock us out for sure!
FEZ:
And if we still get in, and he finds us, and you and Eric aren't around, he will finally kill us.
(whispers)
I have seen it in his eyes.
HYDE:
(rolls eyes)
Why don't you two just hang out at your apartment?
KELSO:
My daughter. This basement is where we get to do all the stupid, irresponsible, pointless stuff that makes life fun. You can't do that when there's a baby around. So now where are we supposed to do that stuff?
HYDE:
Maybe you could try not doing it anymore?
The three boys stare each other down for a moment, contemplating the thought. They all break into laughter at the same time.
BUMPER
INT. GROOVES - DAY
Not dead, but not too busy – the perfect way for a small record store to start off the day. W.B. himself is at the register, along with ANGIE. Among the customers is LEO, jamming out to whatever music is in his headphones in the listening pit.
Hyde and JACKIE enter, unnoticed by anyone. Jackie has her arms wrapped around Hyde's right. His eyeball ring is on her left ring finger, despite being too big. While Hyde is stone-faced, Jackie is beaming, her grip on Hyde's arm visibly shaking with excitement.
JACKIE:
Steven, I can't wait to tell your family we're getting married! Daddy was so excited when I told him, he promised to wire us a dowry from his Swiss bank account as soon as he gets out of prison!
HYDE:
Hey – keep it down, all right? I haven't even told them we're moving to Chicago yet. And I don't think being the boss's kid makes it any easier to replace a co-manager when you give three days' notice.
JACKIE:
(rolls her eyes)
Fine. I won't tell anyone yet.
Leo, seeing them, takes off the headphones and crosses to meet them.
LEO:
Hey, dudes.
JACKIE:
We're getting married!
Hopping in place, she holds out her ring hand for Leo to see. Hyde glares at her.
HYDE:
Jackie!
JACKIE:
Oh, he won't remember, he has no short-term memory!
Leo leans in, takes Jackie's hand for a closer look at the ring. He looks up to Hyde.
LEO:
Hyde, man, you're getting married? That's great, man! Do I know the bride?
Hyde and Jackie share a look and an eye roll.
LEO (cont'd):
(to Hyde)
Hey, you know who you should marry? That loud girl you're always hanging with.
JACKIE:
Leo, I am the loud girl.
LEO:
Hey, loud girl, did you hear Hyde's getting married? He should marry you, man!
Jackie and Hyde are spared any further Leoisms by W.B. and Angie crossing to join them. W.B. is all smiles.
W.B.:
Steven! Here you are. I've got some big news for you.
JACKIE:
Well, we've got some big news for you!
W.B.:
Well, why don't I go first? I'd like to get going for Milwaukee some time before dinner.
W.B. puts one arm around Hyde, the other around Angie, and leads them a few steps off to the side. Leo and Jackie wander back into the listening pit.
W.B. (cont'd):
I'd like to make a few changes around here. Now, Angie, I've noticed you've been doing an excellent job lately -
HYDE:
Excuse me? Angie doesn't know anything about music. Someone came in the other day asking for Kiss, and she called him a pervert and slapped him in the face. And what about the time my friend Bob was in, asked for something "Dean Martiny?" She recommended Blondie.
ANGIE:
She was the top selling record that week.
W.B.:
See, that's what I'm talking about. Sales, numbers, what's moving off the shelves – my little girl's a whiz at all that. That's why I want her to move back to Milwaukee and help run the corporate office.
ANGIE:
Wait, Daddy – are you promoting me?
W.B.:
Sure am, honey.
It's the biggest smile Angie's ever had on her face. Her eyes wide, she gives a little squeak and falls over in a blackout. W.B. looks down at her, smiles, and shakes his head.
W.B. (cont'd):
Just like her mother.
HYDE:
Uh, W.B., if Angie's going to Milwaukee, who's gonna run the store?
W.B.:
You are, son! You know music, you're good with the customers – that's where you excel. So the store's all yours.
Angie starts to come to, though she's still in quite a daze. W.B. helps her to her feet and guides her back to the register.
Hyde, less than thrilled, steps back over to a confused Jackie.
JACKIE:
Did you tell them?
HYDE:
No. And I think I just got stuck with a two-hour commute to work every day.
He shakes his head as Jackie cocks hers.
CUT TO:
INT. FORMAN KITCHEN - DAY
Around lunchtime. Kelso and Fez help themselves to some lunch – potato chips, hot dogs, and soda. They lean on opposite sides of the island as they eat and talk.
KELSO:
I just can't believe we're not gonna get to hang out here anymore. No more eating Mrs. Forman's cooking, no more taking Red's beers, no more putting fire ants in Eric's bed to burn him, no more sneaking in at night for sex with his sister...
FEZ:
That is my one regret about my brief marriage to Laurie Forman.
KELSO:
The sex?
FEZ:
No, that I never got any.
KELSO:
Hey, that's a good point – you were married to Laurie. And I used to do it with her all the time. Red's gotta love us for that, right? He's not gonna lock us out once Hyde and Eric are gone!
The boys nod, scoff at the thought of being thrown out, and trade playful jabs.
Red enters through the patio door, sees the boys.
RED:
Oh – you two.
They stop goofing around and look to Red.
RED (cont'd):
You know the first thing I'm doing once Eric's off at college? Calling a locksmith. And I'm not just gonna have him work on the doors.
He passes through the kitchen into the living room. A crestfallen Kelso and Fez share a look.
BUMPER
INT. ERIC'S BEDROOM – DAY
Eric's room is in a state of tear down. Most of the posters are off the walls and rolled up against the wall, boxes packed with action figure and models are everywhere, and Eric and Donna are in the middle of folding clothes to put into an open suitcase on the bed.
DONNA:
(to Eric)
Have you thought about what else you wanna do in Point Place before we leave? Because I don't think I have anything. I was the local DJ, I helped vandalize the water tower, I burned out a lot – is there really anything else to do in this town?
ERIC:
Maybe it's not things we haven't done so much as ways of doing things we haven't tried.
DONNA:
What do you mean?
ERIC:
I mean... well, take my room.
He sweeps his arm, indicating the few posters and figures still left up.
ERIC (cont'd):
It's my lair, my Batcave, my Fortress of Solitude, if you will. And there's a certain something that we've done in here before – many times – that I, for one, greatly enjoy.
Donna silently chuckles, nods; she knows what he's driving at.
ERIC (cont'd):
And I think, before we pack everything away, we could find a way to do that particular thing in a way that fits the milieu of my lair.
DONNA:
(laughing)
Okay. What did you have in mind?
Eric grins, wiggles his eyebrows.
CUT TO:
Donna sits on the bed, in full PRINCESS LEIA costume. Her hair is even twisted up into the buns. She seems resigned, even mildly amused, to this outfit. Eric sits next to her, hands clasped together, nodding and smiling as he admires her outfit.
BUMPER
INT. FORMAN KITCHEN - DAY
Red, still dressed for work, and Kitty in her nurse's uniform, sit at the kitchen table, enjoying a hot dog lunch at home. Kitty has SCHATZI in her lap and feeds him the odd bit of hot dog every so often.
Hyde and Jackie enter through the patio door. Schatzi gives a friendly yip when he sees Hyde, drawing attention their way.
KITTY:
Oh, there he is!
(laughs)
Schatzi's looking forward to his doggy classes with his big brother.
(lifts up Schatzi, does "cute" voice)
Yes, he is!
(laughs)
HYDE:
Um... yeah. Look, Mrs. Forman -
RED:
Kitty, don't baby talk at the boy. He's not Eric, for God's sake.
(to Hyde)
So, Steven, there's another auto show coming up. Whaddya say we hit the floor?
HYDE:
Wow, Red. That sounds great, but...
JACKIE:
(to the Formans)
Steven doesn't have time for doggy classes and auto shows. His dad just gave him the record store to run all on his own.
Hyde glares at her.
HYDE:
Jackie!
She shrugs; their move and engagement have completely slipped her mind.
JACKIE:
What? That's more responsibility than I ever thought you'd take on at work. I'm proud of you.
HYDE:
Well, I can't take on that responsibility if I go off with you to Chicago.
Red and Kitty both stand.
RED & KITTY:
You WHAT?
They stare at Jackie and Hyde, who shift awkwardly under their glare. Schatzi growls in Kitty's arms.
FADE TO BLACK
COMMERCIAL
BUMPER
INT. FORMAN KITCHEN - DAY
Right where we left off. Kitty fumes as Red points at Hyde.
RED:
You're moving to Chicago?
(Hyde nods)
When?
HYDE:
In three days. The same time Forman's going to UW.
KITTY:
THREE DAYS? There's no time for doggy classes in three days!
HYDE:
Well, that's when Jackie's job starts in Chicago, so -
KITTY:
(to Jackie)
Oh, I should've known this was all your fault, you little tramp!
She advances on Jackie, handing Schatzi off to Hyde.
KITTY (cont'd):
You and that Donna, you're all alike, with your dolled-up faces and your flashy clothes – and I bet you don't even wear a bra. You come in here, sweep sons and orphans off their feet, and then what are the mothers left with? What are they supposed to do? You tell me what I am supposed to do!
JACKIE:
(beat)
Steven and I are engaged.
She holds up her left hand and wiggles her ring finger.
Kitty looks from Jackie's face to her ring, then back. Her jaw slowly drops. Then she throws her hands up as she bursts into a screaming laughter, that Jackie – hesitantly at first, the enthusiastically – joins in on.
KITTY:
Oh, honey, that's wonderful! And I know this wedding will go through – you are the one person around here who wouldn't let a little thing like the groom not showing up stop you from getting married!
(laughs)
Oh, I – I need to hear all about it.
She takes Jackie by the hand and leads her into the living room.
Hyde and Red stare after the women. Red looks amused; Hyde, shocked.
HYDE:
What the hell was that? Jackie just totally diffused everything.
RED:
That's because there's something she knows that you've got to learn – no matter how old they get, women are always excited by weddings.
(turns to Hyde)
So – marriage and Chicago, eh? Are you ready?
HYDE:
(beat)
Yeah.
Red offers his hand, and Hyde shakes it.
HYDE (cont'd):
Any advice?
RED:
Yeah – don't let your kids bring their friends over to your house. Before lunch, I caught the moron and the foreigner trying to force the windows open. I had to chase 'em off with the garden hose.
Hyde slowly nods as Red sits back down to his lunch.
CUT TO:
INT. ERIC'S BEDROOM - DAY
Concurrent with the previous scene. Eric and Donna are still on the bed, Donna still taking Eric's admiring gaze with good humor.
ERIC:
Donna, thank you so much for doing this. This is... wow. I don't – I don't even know where to start.
DONNA:
Well, Princess Leia's force field is down, so you can start wherever you want.
ERIC:
Well, Donna, Leia doesn't have a force field. Force fields are for – you know what, I'm too excited to quibble! Okay, so... can I start by touching your buns?
DONNA:
What, you want to touch my butt?
ERIC:
No, not those buns. You know...
(points to her hair)
The buns.
DONNA:
Eric, that seems kinda weird.
ERIC:
Yeah, you know what? That is, like, a little weird. Maybe I'll just rub my face up against one of 'em.
DONNA:
But Eric -
ERIC:
Um, okay, Donna – from now on, the only thing I'd like you to say is, "use the Force, Eric."
DONNA:
Okay, that seems really -
ERIC:
Donna...
He tilts his head down, gives her "the look." She sighs, turns her head so he has a better angle on the left bun.
DONNA:
Use the Force, Eric.
Eric nods, scoots in closer, and gently caresses Donna's left bun with his face.
ERIC:
Leia... oh, Leia...
Donna rolls her eyes, but lets Eric keep at it.
BUMPER
INT. GROOVES – DAY
Later in the afternoon. The crowd has thinned slightly, though Leo is still in the listening pit and W.B. is still around. He and Angie are reviewing paperwork at the register when Hyde and Jackie enter and cross to them.
HYDE:
W.B., man, I've gotta talk to you.
ANGIE:
(to Hyde)
If it's about Bottle Rocket Friday Nights, I already told him.
HYDE:
No...
(to W.B.)
I can't manage the store.
ANGIE:
(to W.B.)
Called it.
She opens the register and takes out a 20; apparently, she and W.B. had a bet going about this.
W.B. frowns, looks up at Hyde.
W.B.:
Steven, I've told you – I won't let you quit on me. I know you can handle this store on your own.
HYDE:
It's not that. I've just got something else going.
W.B.:
"Something else going?" Like what?
JACKIE:
Me!
She extends her left hand and wiggles her ring finger. W.B. and Angie lean in for a closer look.
ANGIE:
(skeptical)
You're selling eyeball rings?
JACKIE:
(pulls her hand back)
We're getting married, you whore!
W.B. and Angie both glare at her.
JACKIE (cont'd):
(to W.B.)
You can't hit a girl.
She hides behind Hyde, who shakes his head and sighs.
HYDE:
(to W.B.)
We're engaged, man. And Jackie's got a TV job in Chicago, so we're moving there at the end of the month.
ANGIE:
That's in three days.
HYDE:
Yeah, well, that's more notice than I was gonna give.
ANGIE:
What were you gonna give us?
HYDE:
I was gonna not show up for work in three days.
W.B.'s frown deepens. He steps out from behind the register, crosses to Hyde.
W.B.:
Steven, I'm very disappointed.
HYDE:
Hey, I don't owe you anything. I never said I was looking for a long-term future with you. Jackie's the one with all the future plans, and I wanna be with her.
Jackie "awws," hugs Hyde from behind. He shifts in her arms to get his arm around her shoulder, and they both look defiantly up at W.B.
W.B.:
Steven, you didn't let me finish. I'm disappointed because now I've only got three days to get you set up at the Chicago Grooves.
He sees their shocked faces and smiles.
W.B. (cont'd):
Grooves is a chain, man. I've got these stores all over the Midwest!
(offers his hand)
This is great news, son. And you're right – you've got your own life to live. But if you want to run the Chicago Grooves, I'll make the call.
HYDE:
(takes W.B.'s hand)
Wow. Uh – thanks, man.
W.B.:
(to Jackie)
And congratulations. I know you'll give 'em hell.
(points at Hyde)
You give it to him all the time anyway.
Jackie rolls her eyes but smiles back. Hyde kisses her on her forehead.
ANGIE:
(crosses to the others)
Wait... who's going to run the Grooves here then?
Leo comes up behind Hyde, puts a hand on his shoulder.
LEO:
Hey, dudes.
Hyde and Jackie look to Leo. Very slowly, very knowingly, they look to W.B. and Angie. Neither of them looks in any way convinced.
W.B.:
(to Hyde)
You're sure about this?
HYDE:
Yeah, man, Leo's a good guy.
(puts arm around Leo)
He used to run the Fotohut in town. And he only locked himself out of it twice.
LEO:
Actually, it was three times, but I got in through the window I left open.
W.B. and Angie still don't look convinced, but they don't have any other available options. Hyde and Jackie nod, satisfied, and they each clap a grinning Leo on the back.
FADE TO BLACK
TITLE CARD
CARD 1: Three weeks later
CARD 2: Eric Forman's house
CARD 3: August 31, 1979
CARD 4: 10:45 a.m.
EXT. FORMAN DRIVEWAY - DAY
Late morning. The EL CAMINO and VISTA CRUISER are both in the driveway, and both are loaded up with boxes, bags, and suitcases. Donna is adjusting the ties around the bags on top of the Vista Cruiser, while Jackie adjusts the boxes in the flatbed of the El Camino. They talk as they work.
DONNA:
And then he brought out this whole stormtrooper outfit and had me reenact that scene where Luke rescues Leia from the prison cell. Except we didn't so much "escape" as "have sex." In costume.
JACKIE:
Okay, Donna, do yourself a favor: when you get to UW, don't tell anyone you're dating the Star Wars sex student teacher.
DONNA:
It wasn't that bad. Eric was happy. Plus, after we were done, he did something I always wanted to do in my room.
JACKIE:
Oh, yeah? What?
Donna checks the Forman's patio; no one is there. She looks up and down the street; no one is around. Even with the coast all clear, she beckons Jackie over and whispers the answer into her ear. That answer makes Jackie gasp, clasp a hand over her mouth, and grab Donna's wrist with the other hand as both girls start giggling.
CUT TO:
INT. FORMAN BASEMENT – DAY
It's a subdued gathering of the guys in a markedly stripped-down basement; most of the games, most of the toys, most of the records are gone. Eric and Hyde are busy packing up the last of their things while Kelso and Fez sulk on the couch.
FEZ:
Well, here we are. Our last time in the basement together, just us guys.
(to Eric, Hyde)
I am going to miss you two. You are good people.
ERIC:
Miss you too, buddy.
FEZ:
You were the first people to look out for me when I came to this country. The first to welcome me into your home. The first to give me beer and booby magazines.
(sniffs)
Oh, here come the water works.
He puts a hand over his face as the tears swell up.
KELSO:
Yeah, I'll miss you guys too. And the girls. Mostly the girls. I'll even miss Hyde frogging me 'cause of stuff I say about Jackie.
As Hyde passes behind the couch with a few shirts, he pauses to frog Kelso in the arm.
HYDE:
There you go, man. Parting shot.
KELSO:
Thanks, Hyde. And I really am gonna miss this basement. No more late night drinking, no more sex on the couch. It's the end of an era. I guess your friends moving away and the responsibility of watching your illegitimate child on weekends really can change your life.
Eric and Hyde, boxes in hand, pause on their way to the stairs and look to Kelso.
ERIC:
Wait – you only have Betsy on weekends?
KELSO:
Yep.
He doesn't get it, and neither does the still-sobbing Fez. Eric and Hyde share a pitying look.
ERIC:
(to Kelso)
Doesn't that mean you have the whole week to, like, do all the stupid, irresponsible, pointless things in your apartment that you used to do here?
Slowly, Kelso and Fez look up from their brooding. Slowly, they turn toward one another. At once, they spring out of their seats, embrace each other, and dance around in circles, screaming in incoherent delight at this revelation.
Eric and Hyde both smile, shake their heads, and head up the stairs.
CUT TO:
INT. FORMAN LIVING ROOM – DAY
Red sits in his chair, alone in the room. He has an envelope in one hand and a pocketknife in the other. When the kitchen door opens and Eric and Hyde enter, he stands and faces the boys.
RED:
Ah, boys, there you are. I wanted to talk to you before you leave. I don't know if you know this, but I've been looking forward to having you, and anyone your age, out of the house for a long time.
ERIC:
(flat)
Oh, really? Did you notice that, Hyde?
HYDE:
You know, I think I got that impression once or twice.
ERIC:
Was it when he said, "it will be more glorious than D-Day?"
HYDE:
(snaps his free hand)
That was it.
RED:
Yeah. Well...
(to Eric)
You're my son –
(to Hyde)
And you are a fine young man. So... here.
He hands Hyde the envelope.
RED (cont'd):
It's all the money you've paid in rent over the years, plus the interest it picked up in your savings account.
Hyde sets his box down, takes the envelope, opens it up.
HYDE:
Whoa.
RED:
I was tempted to blow that all on booze. Don't you fall for that idea.
(to Eric)
And Eric – here.
Eric sets his box down and, very reverentially, takes the knife.
ERIC:
This is your pocketknife from Korea. You said if I ever touched it, I'd meet the same fate as hundreds of other godless commies.
RED:
Well, I want you to have it. And I want you to know that I'm gonna miss you, and I love you.
ERIC:
Wait a second. What did you just say?
RED:
You heard me.
He opens his arms and pulls Eric into a hug, which Eric returns.
ERIC:
Thank you, Dad.
Red breaks the hug first. He turns to embrace Hyde, who hugs him back. When they finish, Red claps both boys on the shoulder. They pocket their gifts, pick up their boxes, and exit through the kitchen door.
CUT TO:
EXT. FORMAN DRIVEWAY - DAY
Eric and Hyde step outside to find Bob holding Donna in a tight, swaying embrace. He's already blubbering.
BOB:
Oh, I'm gonna miss you, pumpkin.
DONNA:
I'll miss you too, Dad. But don't start eating whole trays of lasagna by yourself, like you did when I was in California.
Bob lets her go.
BOB:
(sniffs)
I only promise to try.
He pulls a hankie from his pocket and dabs his eyes as he walks off.
Eric and Hyde join the girls by the cars, set their boxes down. Donna crosses to Hyde.
DONNA:
Hyde, I'm gonna miss you.
They hug.
Jackie crosses to Eric.
JACKIE:
Eric, I'll miss you too. You've always been very special to me.
ERIC:
(skeptical)
Okay, Jackie, I think the first thing you should do when you get to Chicago is see a psychiatrist.
Jackie rolls her eyes and opens her arms for a hug. Eric nods, lets her hug him, gives a very light one back. When they finish, Jackie crosses to Donna.
JACKIE:
And of course, I'll miss you. My big, clumsy lumberjack.
DONNA:
My annoying little midget.
They smile and hug.
Eric and Hyde turn to face each other.
HYDE:
Hey, man. I got you something for your place in Madison.
ERIC:
Yeah? Well, I got you something for your place in Chicago.
Each pulls out a paper bag. They trade bags, turn away, and look inside. They turn back to each other, all grins.
HYDE/ERIC:
Nice./All right.
They clasp hands and pull into a hug. The girls come up behind them and turn it into a group hug.
A crying Fez and a grinning Kelso come running out from around the house.
FEZ:
MY BUDDIES!
They crash into the group hug, joining in on it.
The patio door opens and a sobbing Kitty comes running out, Schatzi in her arms.
KITTY:
MY BABY!
She worms her way into the heart of the group hug to get at Eric. Bob comes running back up the street to hug the group too. Red steps out from the house, but doesn't join in.
ERIC:
What? Yeah, okay. This is – this is nice. Yeah. It's actually getting a little hard to breathe. Okay, that's good, everyone! Stop now!
The group hug breaks. Kelso takes Fez in his arms as he continues to cry. Hyde scratches Schatzi's head "goodbye," then lets Kitty retreat into Red's arms. He and Jackie get into the El Camino.
Donna crosses to Eric.
DONNA:
This is it. We're finally off to the rest of our lives.
ERIC:
Together.
DONNA:
Yeah – together.
They kiss. Donna climbs into the passenger seat of the Vista Cruiser.
Eric moves to the driver's side door, takes one last look around his childhood home.
ERIC:
(quietly)
So long, Point Place.
He gives a small wave to the town. He climbs in and starts the car. The El Camino starts too. (MUSIC NOTE: instrumental version of "That 70s Song.") The El Camino pulls away first, then the Vista Cruiser. Bob, Fez, Kelso, and the Formans all wave goodbye as the cars drive off, Kitty waving one of Schatzi's little paws.
FADE TO BLACK
CREDITS
INT. FORMAN BASEMENT – NIGHT
A few days later. The basement is still stripped down to just the furniture. Red is at the door. With great relish, he turns the newly installed locks. He savors the click, gives an approving nod. He crosses to the couch, sits down, and turns on the TV to a football game.
Red watches in contentment, at first. His smile slowly fades. He looks to his left and his right. He looks back at the door and back at the stairs. He sighs. His arms fold across his chest and his face settles into a scowl.
RED:
Ah, hell. It's too damn quiet in here!
END.
Scheduling note - the final chapter will drop next Wednesday, not Monday.