Author's Notes: Batwoman Season 1.5 is a continuation of the first season but is based on DC comic material that may be recognizable to some readers. It remains a parody of CW Batwoman characters but obviously not its writing. It may or may not end up totally contradicting Batwoman Season 2 and that's okay with me. Do not assume any characters are safe because they're returning for Season 2.

Season 1.5

It was late afternoon as Batwoman rode closely behind a semi-truck carrying three manufactured homes on her Batcycle. Heavily armed robbers had stolen the truck and the manufactured homes. With real estate being a personal hobby of Kara Wayne, this could not stand. Instead of the highly competent and emotionally stable Kate Kane, her sister, Beth, took on the cowl as her replacement for the summer months.

Beth stayed close behind the slower moving truck with cars to her left and right swerving to get out of the way. Upon seeing her, the robbers slid the first manufactured home off the trailer sending it onto the freeway. Beth fired the twin cannons on her Batcycle blasting the manufactured home apart spraying wood shrapnel in all directions. The Batcycle blasted through the remaining debris of the house and continued pursuit.

"What do you got for me, Barney?" Beth radioed.

"Three shooters not including the driver," Brainiac 5 said as a drone overlooked the chase.

Two shooters in question were on the roof of the second manufactured home. The third was on the porch of the second manufactured house aiming his rifle at Batwoman. The semi-truck suddenly hit two cars making them crash into the guardrail and spin-off. Beth avoided the two out-of-control cars and kept going even as they fell off the interchange. The three shooters opened fire on Beth hitting the Batcycle and her suit without effect. The two shooters on the roof then jumped to the first manufactured home while the third slid the second off the trailer.

Beth moved out of the way as the house hit the pavement and tore apart on impact. With one manufactured house remaining, the semi-truck went for the Gotham bridge to get out of the city. "They're almost outside Gotham jurisdiction," Brainiac 5 warned.

"Batwoman has no jurisdiction," Beth corrected.

Beth drove close enough to the trailer and then leaped off the Batcycle onto the trailer even as she was shot at by the three shooters. Beth threw a Batarang against the shooter on the roof nearly hitting him.

"Ha, dumb bitch!" he said and then realized the electronic Batarang had short-circuited the semi-truck's engine forcing it to slow down.

"Well...shit," he realized.

Beth then took out her butterfly knife and charged the two shooters on the trailer slitting their throats with it. She looked up and threw her knife into the third shooter on the roof getting a direct hit on his throat. Beth leaped onto the roof and slowly made her way to the struggling third shooter as he choked on his own blood. She calmly grabbed her knife and dragged it across the shooter's throat as she retrieved it.

Beth then took a Bat-bomb and placed it on the roof. The bomb exploded collapsing the roof allowing her inside. Beth looked around and found the capsule that resembled a coffin. Kara and Brainiac 5 had assumed the shooters were smuggling drugs. "Now, to get that good shit," Beth said to herself as she opened the capsule.

Inside was a dead man in a suit as if he was about to go to a wake. Beth eyed the man recognizing him instantly. It was the body of Bruce Wayne. "Damn," Beth realized.

At Crows headquarters, Jacob Kane eyed video footage of Batwoman taking down the three shooters and the driver on the highway. "There, magnify," he ordered his tech-guy.

It showed Batwoman with Beth's butterfly knife just before she slashed a man's throat with it. Jacob then turned to his Crow personnel. "We have at least two Batwoman out there wearing the same suit, a conspiracy among several individuals if you will. The first Batwoman I am convinced is Supergirl of Metropolis. The second Batwoman is human, a rather incompetent, erratic, but one that refuses to kill."

"So, which Batwoman is this one?" Sophie asked.

Jacob stared at the footage trying to figure it out. "I'm open to the idea there is a third one."

"A third Batwoman?" Sophie asked incredulously.

"It's what I would do in her position. It gives her a solid alibi. You know what I think? I think there is a ringleader behind the scenes ordering them around, maybe Supergirl herself. I'm willing to bet that each one has a radio headset inside their cowl," Jacob said.

"Get me a radio cracker. I want to know who is talking to her," Jacob ordered Sophie.

"Commander, it's for you," an agent gave Jacob a cell phone.

"Yes?" Jacob asked gruffly. "Are you sure? Thank you."

Jacob then went to his office and sat down devastated. His nephew, Bruce Wayne, was dead.

Kara arrived at Gotham morgue and was allowed to see the body by the mortician portrayed by Brainiac 5. The actual mortician had a case of being unconscious in the closet. "Deceased is Bruce Wayne, age 43, cause of death unknown. Subject appears to be in good health, no wounds, no internal injuries apparent," Brainiac 5 said.

"Maybe it's Hush using Bruce Wayne's face," Kara said wide-eyed.

"I assure you it's not," Brainiac 5 said condescendingly.

"We have to make sure," Kara said tugging on his face. "Okay, I'm satisfied."

"Good to know. May I continue?" Brainiac 5 asked.

"How do you know it's really him?" Kara asked suspiciously.

"The DNA is a perfect match," Brainiac 5 said.

"So?" Kara asked argumentatively.

Brainiac 5 gave her an impatient look. "I've mapped out his scars. These are consistent with his early years."

"Ah, the Nolan years," Kara recalled fondly.

"This burn came from Ducard, this gunshot wound from Harvey Dent. However, noticeably absent are scars from recent years," Brainiac 5 said.

"It creeps me out that you have a detailed history of Bruce Wayne's scars. I'll remind you that I'm the one married to him, not you," Kara said suddenly jealous.

"I also know every scar on Mon's body as well," Brainiac 5 added.

Kara narrowed her eyes at him. "If I had to guess, this Bruce Wayne retired after his fight with Bane. The most recent injury is his vertebra. It would also appear he was into gardening," Brainiac 5 said showing Kara the dirt under his fingernails.

"That's one interpretation. How about he was buried alive and then tore through the ground to get to the surface," Kara theorized.

"That's not a real thing," Brainiac 5 said dismissively. "You see this indentation on his finger. He was married."

"I bet it was to Elliot," Kara said obnoxiously. "You see what I did there? I implied that Bruce Wayne, the Batman, is a homosexual."

"Very woke of you," Brainiac 5 allowed. "However, all evidence to the contrary. Take a look at this tattoo."

Kara eyed a tattoo of a flower with the name "May" underneath it. "That's the name Bruce would have named his daughter with Selina if he ever had one. Instead, he had that little shit, Damien."

"Indeed," Brainiac 5 agreed. "The lines around Bruce's eyes indicate he actually smiled. "And his mouth lines indicate laughter. This Bruce was actually happy."

"Holy shit," Kara said amazed. "Alright, what next?"

"Sign here," Brainiac 5 said giving her a form stating she identified the body.

Kara came out of the morgue and was ambushed by reporters. "How do you feel about your husband's sudden appearance and death?" a reporter asked her.

"Sad," Kara replied.

"What is the future of Wayne Industries?" another reporter asked.

"Wayne Industries is in good hands under my brilliant leadership," Kara assured the reporter.

"Will you be inheriting Bruce Wayne's billions?" another asked.

"Money is the farthest thing on my mind, right now," Kara lied. "My main focus will be on the Wayne family and Wayne Industry employees during this dark time."

Kara then entered her car with Brainiac 5 the driver. "We must move quickly to keep Damien from making a claim on Bruce's wealth. I want it all."

"Of course," Brainiac 5 agreed.

Kara entered Wayne Tower and found Beth in civilian clothes playing with her butterfly knife. Without her blond wig, make-up, and Victorian clothes, she was barely recognizable. Instead, Beth had long brown hair and was wearing black pants and a black coat. Her eyes still screamed crazy.

"Did seeing your cousin dead stir you, maybe shake you?" Kara asked.

"Nope," Beth shook her head.

Kara sat at her desk and eyed Beth wondering if this replacement was still a good idea. "You did well out there but you need to stop using that damn knife. That's Alice's trademark kill," Kara said annoyed.

"Like anyone would suspect Alice of being Batwoman," Beth rolled her eyes.

"These fucks would," Kara said pointing to hundreds of tweets by conspiracy theorists on her phone. "Hand over the knife."

"No, fuck you," Beth refused.

"Beth, this is a deal-breaker. Give me the knife," Kara insisted.

The two stared each other down. "Fine," Beth relented handing it to her.

"Remember that I discovered your identity on day one because of this knife," Kara reminded her.

"So, how am I supposed to kill criminals now?" Beth asked.

"Try a gun. I gave you two of them," Kara said obviously.

"I don't like guns. It's too quick. You don't get to savor all the little emotions," Beth pointed out.

"Try to make this job less about your psychosis and more about fixing this city," Kara suggested.

Brainiac 5 entered the office and placed a folder with legal papers on her desk. "We have a good case to inherit all of Bruce Wayne's wealth...even though he's still alive."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Kara asked.

"Bruce Wayne and Selina Kyle are currently in Romania," Brainiac 5 informed her.

"I don't get it," Beth said honestly.

"Multiverse," Kara sighed. "Okay, that explains things. Either Bruce declares himself alive or I get all his wealth."

"Precisely although it will be difficult for him to reacquire his wealth once it is in your possession," Brainiac 5 said.

"Move quickly on this. He could declare himself alive at any moment," Kara said urgently.

"There is another matter. Kate is resistant to returning to Gotham even for the funeral," Brainiac 5 said.

"How do you know that?" Beth wondered.

"Brainiac 5 created a drone covered in living tissue to be Kate's girlfriend so as to spy on her," Kara said nonchalantly.

"Well, okay then," Beth said not wanting to question that further.

"I suggest we replace Kate indefinitely in case she doesn't return for an extended period of time. This will allow us to spy and manipulate Jacob Kane," Brainiac 5 suggested.

"Why not have me impersonate Kate by wearing her face?" Beth suggested.

Kara and Brainiac 5 stared at her. "We got this," Kara assured her.

Brainiac 5 then morphed into Kate impersonating her perfectly. "Look at that, you're the same height," Kara smirked.

"A short man's joke? Really?" Brainiac 5 asked with a perfect imitation of her voice.

"Make us proud," Kara said to him.

Jacob entered his apartment and was immediately embraced by Mary. "I heard it on the news," she said.

"I'm alright," Jacob said wanting to be strong for her. "Your mother, now this," he sighed.

Mary kept her mouth shut not wanting to reveal her mother was secretly alive in San Francisco. Kate then entered the apartment. "So, you're back?" Jacob asked suspiciously.

"Yeah, I came back when I heard," Kate said somberly.

"I expect you both to be presentable at the funeral," Jacob said to them.

"Dad, I've been giving it a lot of thought recently. I've decided to dress more professionally, get a more traditional hairstyle, remove all my tattoos, and live as a straight woman," Kate said.

"Well...it's about time," Jacob said pleased.

"And when I have gained your trust, I want to apply to be a Crow," Kate said ambitiously.

"Is this so you can get close to Sophie?" Jacob asked skeptically.

"Sophie and I are finished forever," Kate assured him.

"Well, it's a good start, Kate. What brought you to your senses?" Jacob asked.

"Kara Wayne has been a really good boss and mentor to me these last several months," Kate replied.

"Well, I'll be sure to thank her in person at the funeral," Jacob said appreciatively. Jacob then went to his study to be alone. Mary gave Kate a WTF look.

Kate came over to Mary. "I've neglected you, Mary, and I'm sorry. You're my true sister."

"What about Beth?" Mary asked.

"Fuck her," Kate said and then gave Mary a hug.

At the funeral, Kara was upfront in black with Alfred at her side. The Kane family consisting of Jacob, Mary, and Kate was on the other side of the casket. A large gathering of Gotham big-shots was present, some of which were secretly pleased the Wayne line was dead.

"I want a raise or I'll spill everything," Alfred threatened.

"Whatever you want," Kara agreed.

"You do know that Bruce was an atheist?" Alfred reminded her.

"I don't give a shit. This funeral is not for him, it's for me," Kara said arrogantly.

"Sorry for your loss," Falcone said to her with Moroni at his side.

"Grazi," Kara said to him.

Jacob Kane came over to Kara. "If there is anything you need," he offered.

"No, what I can do for you and your family?" Kara asked him.

"We could work together to make Gotham a better place, make it liveable," Jacob said.

"I can agree to that. Together, we will make Gotham...great again," Kara told him.

"What you've done for Kate. No words can describe my appreciation," Jacob said sincerely.

"Oh, it was super-easy, barely an inconvenience," Kara assured him.

"None-the-less, thank you," Jacob said to her and walked off.

After the funeral, Alex Danvers and Kelly Olsen came over to Kara. "I'm so sorry, Kara. I know it was a sham marriage but you must be hurting on some level," Alex said.

"I can help you get through your grief process," Kelly offered.

"He's still alive. That was a Bruce from another universe," Kara said to them.

There was a long awkward silence. "Just when I thought you couldn't get any lower," Alex scolded.

"I'm going to claim this baby is his," Kara said pointing to her belly.

"And I was wrong," Alex said unimpressed. "So, where's Mon? Shouldn't your husband be here for you as you grieve over your other husband's death?"

"He's busy building a cult of personality for himself in North Korea. It's a full-time job," Kara excused him.

"And I'm done," Alex said taking off.

"Hater," Kara mocked her as she left with Kelly.

That night at Arkham, two unsuspecting guards did their rounds when a dark figure of death appeared behind them. "Batman? We just redid the damn triggers. How did you get in?" the first guard asked surprised.

"Man, I have to say it's an honor to...," the second guard brown-nosed.

Batman suddenly slashed the second guard in half at the midsection with a large scythe blade. Before the first guard could react, Batman slit the throat of the first guard. Three more guards arrived on the scene. "Freeze right there, mother-fucker or you go down fast," the lead guard said as Batman took a knee in front of his victims.

"Holy shit, it's Batman. Are those guns? But Batman doesn't use guns," a second guard said confused upon seeing a collection of rifles on Batman's back.

"Now, he does," Batman said gruffly and then fired his rifle blasting the first guard full of holes. He placed the second guard in a chokehold.

"Please don't," he pleaded.

Batman ignored him and plunged a knife into his scalp. He then subdued the third guard to the floor and stomped on his head repeatedly crushing his skull.

"Batman we are foes but this isn't you. Please, the doctors here say that when you lose control the best thing is to picture...," an Arkham inmate said to him.

Batman blasted him with the flame thrower on his rifle before he could finish. Batman then approached a door he was looking for. "Come in, Batman has lost his mind. He's about to open the cell door to...," a guard tried to radio.

Batman threw a knife into his head dropping him before he could finish. Batman then used an explosive to blast the door off and then went inside. "Hello, old friend," Batman said to Joker.

"Hello, Bats," Joker smiled. "Don't tell me you're actually here to kill me."

"No," Batman replied.

There was an awkward silence between them. "But I am," a black sinister creature said behind Batman. He was dressed in all black, a black bulletproof vest, black leather jacket, a black cowl, and a metal band around his head that had spikes all across. His mouth was pale, his lips red with lipstick, and his teeth animalistic fangs. He grinned insanely at the Joker with a high-pitched voice.

"Wait, we can work something out. We can work together," the faux Joker said fearfully as the Batman Who Laughs advanced on him with a scythe blade in his hand.

"That's kind of you, Joker. My answer...," Batman Who Laughs said as he sliced into Joker's scalp killing him instantly.

"Is Ha!" he grinned with blood all over his lower face.

Kara entered the Bat Cave and found Brainiac 5 and Beth already there. Brainiac 5 was on the computer while Beth was playing with her butterfly knife. "This is going to be a thing all season, isn't it?" Kara realized.

"Bitch, you might be right," Beth said as she continued to play with it.

"There's been an attack at Arkham. Six guards and two inmates are dead," Brainiac 5 reported showing the victims on screen.

"It would appear that the target was the faux Joker," Kara considered.

"It was their last kill," Brainiac 5 agreed.

"There's more than one?" Kara asked.

"Indeed," Brainiac 5 said showing Grim Batman and the Batman Who Laughs.

Kara felt a chill go through her as she eyed them both on the surveillance cameras. "What...the...fuck?" she wondered.

"That's what I said," Beth chimed in.

"It's possible multiple Batman manifestations are arriving in this universe due to some undetermined cause," Brainiac 5 said.

"Or...comic-con came early," Kara said brightly.

"Do not underestimate the Bat or suffer your cousin's fate, you will," Brainiac 5 warned.

"You mean getting your ass kicked soundly and nearly sliced through by a Kryptonite spear?" Kara asked.

"Yeah," Brainiac 5 said.

"Shouldn't you be warning me? I'm the puny human, remember?" Beth interjected.

"No, because you're staying clear away from these two mother-fuckers," Kara ordered her.

"The fuck I will. I'm not afraid of no Batman," Beth said confidently.

"Seriously, as much as I would enjoy seeing you get yourself killed, you're grounded until we figure this out," Kara ordered her.

"So, what do I do now?" Beth asked bored.

"You're going to be a high-class real estate agent," Kara told her.

"Well, okay then," Beth clapped her hands.

At Crows headquarters, the room was silent as every agent watched the surveillance footage of the Grim Batman and the Batman Who Laughs. "What the fuck?" Jacob wondered thinking he had seen it all.

"Those two don't look like Batman. Batman doesn't use guns and that thing is just weird," Sophie pointed out.

"Well...no shit," Jacob agreed. "I have been in touch with the people at Arkham. We're not going to create a panic by suggesting Batman is back and he's on a killing spree. We don't even know if these two are even related to Batman. They could just be thugs wearing a mask for all we know. So, keep this under wraps until we know more," Jacob said to everyone in the room.

"Is that clear?" Jacob asked them.

"Yes, Sir," they all said.

"Sir, someone is on our roof. I think it's her," Sophie said to him.

Jacob silenced her before she could say "Batwoman" and then made his way to the roof with his pistol ready. "The fuck you want now?" he asked Batwoman.

Kara walked towards him not intimidated by his pistol. "Only Supergirl or a fool would get this close to my Desert Eagle," he said to her.

"Even that can't penetrate my suit," Kara told him off.

"No, but I'm an excellent shot. I'll get you right between your teeth," Jacob threatened.

"We have other problems besides whatever this is," Kara said dismissively. "These two Batmen are the real deal, highly trained professionals, but they're not our Batman."

"What are you saying?" Jacob asked. "That they're impersonators?"

"No, they're the Batman of their respective universes. This isn't the only universe in existence. There are parallel Earths, an infinite number of them all with their own version of Batman," Kara explained.

"You expect me to believe that crap?" Jacob doubted.

"I don't give a shit what you believe. It's the truth and you will soon find out that these two men are just as skilled and lethal as our Batman," Kara said to him.

"You're afraid of them," Jacob said smugly.

Kara got close to Jacob. "You're a fool if you're not."

"What do you propose? A truce?" Jacob asked her.

"Just until these two are taken care of," Kara offered.

"Fine," Jacob relented offering his hand to her.

Kara shook his hand and then leaped off the roof gliding away.

Jacob entered his apartment and found Kate making dinner. Jacob gave her an odd look but quickly recovered. "Kate, there are two madmen dressed as Batman out there. I don't want you out at night."

"Sure thing, Dad," Kate said obediently.

"Is Batman your hero, Kate?" Jacob asked.

"Isn't he everyone's hero?" Kate asked.

"Never to me, and I think he's shown his true colors tonight. He killed six guards and two inmates at Arkham."

"That is fucked up," Kate said shocked and appalled.

"Do you believe there are other dimensions, universes out there?" Jacob asked her.

"I suppose anything is possible," Kate shrugged.

"What if in one of those universes, I'm the bad guy," Jacob pondered. "What if we're not in control of our destiny but split infinite ways across infinite planes of existence?"

"That is deep," Kate nodded.

"Where's Mary?" Jacob asked realizing something was amiss.

"At her illegal clinic," Kate snitched.

"Damn it. Bring her back immediately," Jacob ordered.

Mary was working on a patient that had been slashed pretty badly with a scythe blade. "Don't worry. You're going to make it," Mary assured the patient.

There was a chuckling sound from the back of the room. "Ha-ha, he-he, ho, he, aha. And I thought my jokes were bad," the real Joker revealed himself with clown make-up on and in a purple suit.

"Holy shit," Mary realized.

"I'm sorry. Was I supposed to knock? Knock, knock," he mocked her.

"You need treatment. I can give it to you," Mary said freaked out as he advanced towards her.

"Oh, but I don't need treatment," Joker said taking out a pistol.

"Mr. Joker, this is a clinic for sick people. It's a sanctuary, understand?," she said holding up her hands.

"Do I look like the kind of man that gives a damn?" Joker laughed at her and then fired point-blank.