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Chapter 69
Hermione and him left the headmaster's office. She realized that they needed a place to sleep. They could of course go to the room of requirement. They walked to the seventh floor and tried to enter it. It was occupied.
"Gryffindor tower is closer than the dungeons." Hermione said slowly. It was fine, Severus followed her blindly.
They made it to the Fat Lady's portrait. It was open. He followed her and looked around. "You've never been inside here." He looked around. Hermione let him inspect the place and then grabbed his hand to go up to the girls' dorm room. He made it to third step before the staircase turned into a slide. Hermione and him were on the floor.
Severus frowned and flew with her. Hermione led him to her dorm room. They undressed and got into her bed. Severus hugged her. "I was afraid you would want to go back." He whispered.
"I would never leave you Severus." She said and hugged him as he trembled.
"It changes nothing. I am in love with you." Severus said and made her look into his eyes. She felt everything he did at that moment. He felt the deep rejection. The heartache of finding that his father was better off without him. The betrayal that Tobias loved and accepted a little girl that was not his when in another lifetime he scorned and hurt his only son. He showed her Lily and felt love, a deep, violent love, a need to protect. He then showed an image of her. She felt breathless, a joy incontrollable, she felt so much love. Something so powerful, dangerous and hundred times bigger than whatever he felt for Lily." She had tears on her eyes.
"I always think that she will take you away from me." Hermione loathed to say to words.
Severus shook his head vehemently. "Never, this is why I know. I love Lily, I truly do, but as Albus said, it is as a little sister. I chose you. I will keep choosing you. We can bond if you want. Do you want to get married? We are both seventeen. We can find Albus and have him do the ceremony right now."
"No." Hermione said clearly. She looked at his crestfallen face. "I want all of our friends there." Severus kissed her gently.
"You will stop aging soon." Severus said while he caressed her face.
"Does it matter?" She asked him.
"Not in the least." Severus said openly. "You may have to use charms around people."
Hermione nodded. She kissed his lips gently. "You received a very nasty shock."
"I don't want to talk about him anymore." Severus hissed.
"I think you should Sev." She said gently.
Severus shook his head. They remained quiet and then Severus sobbed into her shoulder.
"He hit me. He hit me when I did magic. I had to hide and mum was so scared he would hit her too. They argued every day. He loves that little girl. I want him dead." Severus said brokenly.
"Oh Severus." She said and kissed his cheeks. "You don't. I know you don't. You are a good person. Too good for the likes of him." She said firmly.
Severus cried and told her of all the times Tobias scared him. "He is so good with that little girl. Why could he not be good with me? Why did he hate me?"
Hermione hugged him more and let him cry. "He was not all bad. He took me to football games." He then told her that Tobias could be a nice dad sometimes.
"Sev, I truly think that he loved you. He just didn't know how." Hermione caressed his hair and face.
"He had a picture of them, the little girl and the woman in one of the hiding places. He never put a picture of us." Severus said resentfully.
"He left home when I was sixteen. I told you he stopped hitting me once I could hit back. Well, he hit mum. He hit her hard. I came back from Hogwarts. Lily and I were no longer friends. I was bitter. I found mum with a black eye and asked where he was. He came drunk that night and tried to rape her. I heard the noises. I went into their room and pulled him off of her. I used magic and burned him. He left home that night. Mum blamed me. She died after my seventeenth birthday. She had cancer I think. We never knew. She never went to St. Mungos or a muggle hospital. Her magic was weak by the end."
Hermione listened carefully and held him as he spoke. It was the longest Severus spoke about his childhood. He told her of the pact with Lily. His drive to be powerful, to make sure Lily would be safe. It was the most detailed confession of his life and the pain that came with all those nights being scared that something would set Tobias off. Hermione discovered that Tobias and Eileen were both tormentors and sources of love. She understood him better then. She did not feel pity for him. She felt regret that she did not know him as a child. She thought of Lily and how she rejected him after the lake.
"Lily did not know all of it. I couldn't bring myself to tell her all. She knew that he would beat me sometimes that's all she knew. I couldn't tell her. I was ashamed of them. She came from a nice house. Her parents loved her. I thought she would stop being my friend." Severus said softly. Her poor Sev. Hermione was sure that if Lily knew, then things would have gone differently.
Lily would have thought twice before not forgiving him. She was sure. They would have married and the boy in the prophecy would have been his. Hermione sighed and held him.
"I will never tell anyone." She said carefully.
"I know you will not. For years, I thought you would leave me. I don't think I became convinced that you would not disappear until tonight." He said softly.
"Never, you hear me." Hermione said fiercely. She kissed him forcefully. Severus responded and soon they were naked. He was desperate for her. She let him take her. He needed this from her. Severus sought refuge that early morning. She moaned when he spilled inside of her and welcomed him.
Hermione woke up much later. Severus still heavy around her. She glanced at the window and realized it was almost nightfall. They slept the day away. Severus stirred behind her. She stood up and saw Crooks sleeping on Lily's bed.
Hermione went to the restroom and then went back to bed. Severus was awake. "I'm hungry."
"We could go to the kitchens." She said.
"No, I rather not move from here." He said and went into the loo.
Hermione sighed. They needed to eat something. Suddenly she heard a pop. Winky was by her side. "Mistress."
"Oh, Winky has missed her mistress." The little elf said. Hermione sent her back to Tom before Severus and her settled in New York.
"I missed you too. Where were you?" Hermione asked politely.
"Master Tom sent me to take care of you. Bapsy passed away three weeks ago. Mistress mustn't feel sad. Bapsy was asleep and happy." Winky replied quickly.
"Mopsy takes care of the manor. I takes care of Hammersmith and helps Mopsy. Master Tom sent me to take care of Master Severus." Winky said happily. "I is to make sure master eats and sleeps and does not sneak out." Winky said innocently.
"Good Winky. Now, Master Severus does not need to know that. He will be very upset with Master Tom." Hermione said hurriedly not before Severus stepped out.
"Master Severus." Winky squealed in delight.
"Winky, what are you doing here?" Severus asked.
The little elf delivered the same message. Severus pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Winky, I want you to go to the kitchens, get some food for me and your mistress. I also forbid you to go back to Master Tom."
Winky's ear flopped, "was Winky bad?"
"Not at all. You are the most wonderful domestic elf. Master Severus is cross with Master Tom. It is all their problem." Hermione explained.
"Go to the kitchens." Severus hissed.
Winky popped away. "You must not take your anger out on her. She's trying to help."
"He sent a spy. How dare he?" Severus fumed.
Hermione hugged his back. "Calm down. Let's eat and then we'll talk."
"I don't want to talk." Severus said and ate some of the food that appeared magically by the center of the room. Crookshanks awakened from his sleep and waited to be fed.
They ate in silence. Severus ate well and then motioned to go to bed. Hermione followed him while Crookshanks ate the leftovers. The plates disappeared after Crookshanks was done with food.
Hermione rested by his side. "I just want to hold you." He said softly. Hermione nodded and they fell asleep once more.
Severus and her spent the next week holed up in the dorms. They slept, ate, had sex and read books. Severus had no intentions of leaving or talking about Tom. They received three letters that went unanswered.
Hermione watched and waited for Severus to process. He needed time. Hermione knew that. The second week found Severus working on his sound system. Hermione was in her knickers and Severus in boxers when he tinkered with it and then the music began to play.
"Someone told me long ago
There's a calm before the storm"
She looked at him and saw his smile for the first time in weeks. "Come and dance with me."
"I know, it's been comin' for some time
When it's over, so they say
It will rain a sunny day
I know, shinin' down like water
I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain?
I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain
Comin' down on a sunny day?"
He sang and held her close. Hermione rested her head on his shoulder. He still needed a bit of growing to do but he was taller than her now.
"Yesterday and days before
Sun is cold and rain is hard
I know, been that way for all my time
And forever, on it goes
Through the circle, fast and slow
I know, it can't stop, I wonder
I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain?
I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain
Comin' down on a sunny day?
Yeah"
Her Severus expressed himself through music. He hurt deeply. She held him as they danced and he remembered old childhood days.
"I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain?
I wanna know, have you ever seen the rain
Comin' down on a sunny day?"
Severus played music for another three days. It was a good sign when he took the sound system to the dungeons. "It works there too. I thought it would not, but it truly works."
Hermione smiled, "Should we go to the lake? It's a beautiful day."
Severus nodded, "we should. It may be the last time we have the grounds to ourselves. They are supposed to come back the day after tomorrow."
"I'd forgotten," Hermione replied airily.
Severus kissed her cheek, "no you haven't but thank you." He grabbed her hand and they were off to the lake.
It was a beautiful day. They rested on the grass and carried the sound system. It also worked there. They listened to Elton John, the unmovable Led Zeppelin, ABBA, Queen and the Beatles. They ate outside too. They saw Hagrid and waved at him.
"I love seeing him use magic." Hermione said with a smile.
They laughed when the squid splashed them. They were both wet and decided to let the August sun dry them.
Hermione felt it was time to ask him, "Sev, do you think you can talk to him yet?" She asked gently.
"Not yet." Severus said.
Hermione nodded, "I know you are hurting. I know it wasn't easy to see Tobias that way but Tom tried to protect you."
Severus frowned, "he should not have lied."
Hermione frowned back, "we have lied to him all his life."
"That's different." Severus retorted, "you know why we cannot ever tell him. It would break him. It would cause him so much unnecessary pain." He explained.
"Like the one you feel. He was trying to save you from that pain." Hermione explained.
"He's treated me like a child. I am not the child. He is the child." Severus replied.
"Sev, you very well know that he is not a child anymore. Our Tom is Minister of Magic." She said quickly.
"I do not want to see him." Severus finished and played another song. Hermione stopped insisting for the day.
They went back to her dorm and stayed there for the next three days. Hermione noticed that she had new robes, books, and school supplies the morning of September 1st. Hermione spent the day with Severus. They changed into robes the hour before they rest of the students were to be back to school. Minerva came in a few hours earlier. "Severus, Tom wishes to speak to you tomorrow."
"I don't wish to speak to him." Severus replied and left for the dungeons.
"How is Tom?" Hermione asked Minerva.
"Busy, worried for you two." The woman said with a hint of reproach.
"Severus needs more time." Hermione said with an air of infinite patience.
"It's been almost three weeks." Minerva replied sharply.
"Well, he needs more." Hermione answered with equal amounts of sharpness. "I did not mean to speak to you in this way." She followed up.
"Neither did I. Hermione, truly, Tom did not mean to hurt Severus." Minerva continued.
Hermione sighed, "it was not easy for Severus, to see his father like that."
Minerva nodded, "for all it's worth Tobias Snape appears to truly care for his new family."
"I will see Tom." Hermione smiled and walked away. She found Severus dressed with his Slytherin uniform but in her bed. He wiggled his eyebrows and patted the bed next to him.
"We do not have time for what you have in mind." She sing sang and left to shower. She dressed in the restroom. She knew that Severus would try to convince her to have his way with her if she paraded half naked in front of him.
She finished smoothing her skirt and pulled up her socks. She walked to Severus who frowned but joined her as they made their way to the common room.
Severus wrinkled his nose at the décor. "It is truly hideous. All this red and gold." He muttered as he sat down by one of her favorite tables. She rolled her eyes at him, "because the Slytherin common room is such an elegant piece of architecture."
Severus arched an eyebrow, "it is."
Hermione frowned and ignored him for a bit. They ended up snogging by one of the couches. She set up an alarm to leave to the Great Hall once the rest of the students arrived to the castle. "We can join them there." Hermione said quickly as they left the common room. They walked to the Great Hall and saw that there were already a few scattered students around the hall.
Hermione kissed his lips and went to join the Gryffindor table. There were a few third years and a second-year boy seated. She waited for Lily and the marauders to arrive. Soon enough. Lily arrived side by side with James. Sirius and Remus walked behind them. Peter brought the rear. He was speaking with a sixth year Gryffindor.
Lily smiled when she saw her. "Hermione." She said and hugged her. "I've been owling you for weeks. Did you two go away?" She asked.
"We stayed in Scotland." She said simply. Lily blinked but then waved at Severus who waved back.
Hermione kept glancing at the Slytherin table. Severus ate and spoke to Narcissa and Regulus. He also talked to Rosier who laughed about something or other.
Minerva walked in with the first years behind them. Hermione saw the little girl. She was slight, black-haired with warm brown eyes. She was pale and seemed younger than eleven. She was paired with a sandy haired girl who also looked very anxious.
Hermione listened to the Sorting Hat's song and then watched as the kids were sorted. She looked at Elizabeth. The little girl stumbled to the stool and then the Hat covered her eyes. "Hufflepuff" it yelled.
Elizabeth smiled and joined her brown-haired friend. She glanced at Severus who appeared relieved. She understood then, what if the girl ended in Slytherin? Lily talked about her summer Holiday as they went up to the Gryffindor common room.
"James visited again two weeks after the Led Zeppelin show. He asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes." Lily said excitedly.
Hermione smiled, "good for you." They stayed a bit in the common room.
Lily was Head Girl while James received the honor too. Hermione rolled her eyes, Remus should have been Head Boy. "I refused it." Remus said softly as they sat down to talk about their holidays. Sirius and Peter played a game of catch the snitch while James and Lily left the common room. They needed to talk to prefects from all the houses.
Hermione smiled, "I figured but why?"
Remus shrugged. He smiled, "I imagine you know about my condition."
Hermione nodded, "I figured it out after a month. Do not think that anyone told me."
The boy shook his head, "you are very smart. Of course, you figured it out. Well, I don't fancy being Head Boy when I could hurt them all."
"Don't say those things. Of course, you wouldn't." She said and squeezed his hand.
Remus smiled, "thank you. How come we did not see you at Diagon Alley? I thought we said we would meet there to buy our things."
Hermione thought of a lie quickly, "Severus got sick. We stayed with Mr. Snape's in laws for a bit. What did you do?"
"I stayed over with James. Dad and mum have decided to move to America." Remus replied with a smile.
"Will you go to America?" Hermione asked interested in her friend.
"I don't think so. I have a year to figure out what to do with my life." Remus looked weary. "It may be hard for someone with my condition to find a stable job."
Hermione wanted to contradict him but she knew it was for naught. She changed the subject to their NEWTS. "We have to study as soon as possible. We need to get all O's." She said quickly.
Remus nodded. "It may increase my chances."
"Of course." She said and flew to her dorm to find all of her planners.
Sirius laughed at her. She scowled at him, "you should study too. Daddy will not always be there to buy you things."
Sirius scowled back. "Sourpuss." He said and went back to exploding things for the benefit of the sixth-year girls.
Remus helped her make schedules for all of them. Lily and James came back an hour after. Lily was in tears.
"You did not have to hex him." She yelled angrily.
"He was out of bed. He should have been where he belongs. In the dungeons." James replied just as angry.
Lily was red faced and left in a huff.
"Tell your slime ball of a boyfriend to stay away from Lily." James rounded on her.
Remus frowned. "don't yell at her." He stood up. Hermione frowned. "Thank you, Remus, but I don't need defending." Hermione picked up her schedules and went to bed. Lily was angrily putting her things around the dorm room.
"He is an arse." Lily muttered as she wiped tears away.
"What happened?" Hermione asked her. Lily looked at her, "We were patrolling the third floor. We happened upon Sev. He was with Rosier, doing who knows what.
"Rosier was his usual charming self. Severus and him were going back to the dungeons. You know who Severus and James are. James asked what they were doing. Severus called him a nosy fucker and then James hexed him. Sev hexed him back. Rosier left when he saw the badges." Lily continued. "I asked Severus to undo the hex. He did and then left for the dungeons."
Hermione sighed, "I thought they would be more civil to each other. They did nicely when we went to see Led Zeppelin."
Lily nodded, "James is just an arse and Severus. He provokes him. Don't look at me like that. You know he does."
Hermione could not argue with her. "Maybe it's best that they stay away from each other."
Lily wiped her face once more, "I love James. I truly do, but I cannot imagine a life where you and Severus are not there." Hermione knew that she only meant Severus. She knew that Lily however wanted to include her because it would make her feel bad if she only said Severus' name.
Hermione hugged the girl, "forget what I said. We'll figure something out. Now tell me how did the rest of the holiday go for you?"
"Hermione, you won't believe it." Lily's green eyes sparkled. "Tuney left Vernon. She said she's done. Oh, it was awful. I should not be so happy."
"What happened?" Hermione asked very interested.
Lily explained, "Vernon came over for dinner. Mum and dad were in the kitchen and Tuney went to check on dessert. Vernon tried to be his sleazy self. I was about to hex him but Tuney came in. I am sure she heard him but she did not say anything."
"We talked about my class term and then about Tuney's courses in University. Vernon said that Tuney would not need to go to University any longer. Well, I could tell that Tuney did not like that at all but she remained quiet. It happened when Tuney served dessert. Vernon made a very disgusting comment about me being a witch. I thought that Tuney would smile and brush it off. She did when I told her about when I told her about his other comments. Tuney didn't. She cleared her voice and told him that he should leave."
"Lily is Head Girl and magic isn't so bad. Her friends are nice." Tuney said. "And I heard what you said to her earlier. Please leave. I do not want to see you anymore." Lily continued. "Mum and dad looked proud of her. They turned Vernon at the door. Tuney cried for two days but then she was almost nice to me again. I have high hopes for Christmas break." Lily said excitedly.
Hermione smiled. "That's nice."
"You have to tell me what happened to you and Sev. Why did you two never come to Cokeworth? I had to buy my supplies with James and the marauders later." Lily said.
Hermione knew that Severus did not want anyone knowing that he met Tobias or his relationship with Lizzie Parr. "Tom thought it would be best for Sev and I to be in Scotland. You heard about the ministry. Tom thinks London would be too dangerous for us."
Lily frowned, "I bet Sev loved that. No wonder he looked so grumpy tonight." Lily said.
Hermione nodded, "I think it's time for bed." She went to her own bed and undressed. She realized she was tired but could not go to bed. She missed Sev. It always happened when they went back to school." She tossed and turned. Lily who was a very heavy sleeper snored away. Hermione stood up and petted Crookshanks who purred.
The witch walked to the loo and then yawned. Hermione went back to bed and could not for the life of her sleep. She decided to continue reading her book about magical maladies. It was not in her dorm. She sighed opened the door. She must have left it in the common room. She tried a simple accio when she saw the snake patronus in front of her. It just appeared. "Open the door." Severus' voice whispered.
Hermione went down the steps. She forgot her robe. It was cold. She walked carefully and looked around there was no one in sight. She opened the door.
"What are you doing here?" Hermione hissed.
Severus frowned, "nice to see you too." He hissed back and climbed through the hole. He wore a black dressing gown.
"You can't be here." Hermione whispered furiously.
"I can't sleep. This is all so silly. I need my sleep. Now, let's get to bed." Severus said and marched to the staircase.
He grabbed her and they flew to the dorm. Hermione's yell was cut off by his hand. Hermione frowned at him.
"It still worked." Severus mumbled.
"Why didn't you apparate us?" Hermione frowned. She was not too fond of flying and worse when he did not tell her beforehand.
"Albus took away my privileges." Severus said simply. They walked to the dorm.
"You have to be careful. Lily is sleeping." Hermione said gently. She was happy that Lily slept all covered up and like the dead.
Severus did not even glance at Lily. He went straight to her bed and opened his arms to her. She kissed his lips and sighed contentedly when he rumbled. "Don't be so randy. I only aim to sleep." He whispered.
Hermione laughed and kissed his neck. It was a good sign that he was joking again.