Chapter 33: Results Are In

"You came in late last night. Are you still puking your guts-" Mark started to say as he looked up. "Oh." He said as he looked at Adrien. "Oh..." He said as he looked over at Meredith.

"Morning." Adrien said as he looked up at Mark.

"Morning." He said as he looked at Meredith.

"I haven't seen you in a while." Mark said smartly.

"You'll be seeing more of me." Adrien replied. "I have to shave." He said as he kissed Meredith on the head and walked away.

"What the hell is that? I thought we got rid of Frenchy." Mark said quickly as he motioned to the bathroom.

"I- I don't know..." Meredith sighed as she looked down at the coffee that was making her nauseous.

"What about Derek?" Mark asked matter-of-factly.

"What about him?" She asked as she began to tear up. "He moved on." She said as she walked over and dumped her coffee in the sink. "I finally did it. I pushed him away."

"What are you talking about?" Mark said with confusion.

"He hates me. He says he doesn't... It's all my fault. I pushed him away. I alienated him. He didn't deserve it. I kept him in limbo. I ruined the best thing I ever had." Meredith said as she sat in the chair and started putting her boots on.

"Pull him back." Mark said quickly.

"No. No, because I don't want to be the one... I destroy people. And I am done." Meredith told him.

"What about Adrien?" Mark asked.

"I don't know... I'm sure I'll hurt him too. But I told him. I told him that I will hurt him. He seems convinced that he can save me. There is no saving me. Not now." She said as she pulled her shoes on.

"Are you ready?" Adrien asked as he walked in.

"I suppose so..." Meredith muttered as she started to walk out. "Shit!" She muttered as she ran back in. She rushed into the bathroom.

"Mer... Are you okay? You've been in there a long time. I have surgery." He said quickly.

"I- Just leave." She told him.

"I'll take her." Mark said as he walked to the door. Adrien looked at him and nodded.

"Okay... I'll see you there." Adrien said as he rushed out. Meredith emerged from the bathroom after a half an hour.

"I'm okay." She said with a nod.

"Sure. Sure, you are. After the accident... Your body is so screwed up..." He said, rolling his eyes. "And today you are getting checked out. Period." She rolled her eyes and followed him out the door.

Meredith walked down the hallway. Her interns were on assignments and she had back to back surgeries. It was going to be a very long, very busy day. And of course, she didn't have coffee or breakfast. She was running on empty and the day just started. She yelped when she felt someone grab her arm from behind and pull her.

"Hey!" She shouted at Mark as she looked up. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I am taking your blood." He said frankly. "You are sick."

"I am fine!" Meredith said as she started to walk out. "And I have surgery."

"Too damn bad. You have a second. They can't start without you." Mark said frankly.

"Fine. But you are wasting your time. It's probably the tequila. Or the fact that I haven't gotten a full night's sleep in a long time." She said as she rolled her sleeve up.

"Or your body could be shutting down." Mark said quickly.

"My body could be shutting down?" She said with a laugh. "How the hell did you become a doctor?"

"Hell, if I know." Mark said with a shrug.

"Oh god." Meredith said as she closed her eyes tightly.

"Oh, come on... You baby!" Mark said as he watched her blood flow.

"I hate needles." She pouted.

"You picked the wrong field." Mark joked as he watched her open her eyes and quickly closed them.

"It hurts." She moaned.

"It does not." Mark laughed as he looked at her closed eyes.

"Does." She argued.

"That's funny, seeing how I pulled the needle out a while ago." Mark said with a chuckle. Her eyes flew open and she looked down.

"You ass!" She yelled as she smacked him playfully.

"I know." He said as he walked out of the room. "Take this to the lab." Mark told a nurse as he handed her the blood work. "You better pick that up later." He said as he looked over at her.

"Yeah, yeah." She muttered as she walked down the hallway.

Meredith walked into the scrub room, seeing Danny Carter scrubbing his hands.

"Hmm... Did I really ask you to scrub in?" She asked as she started scrubbing her fingernails.

"You did." He said with a smirk.

"Imagine that." Meredith said as she shook her head. She bumped the door with her hip and walked in. She dried her hands with the surgical towel and stood there as the nurse gloved her up. "Good morning, everyone. Let's do this..." She said with a smile as she nodded at the anesthesiologist.

"Ten blade." She muttered as she stuck her hand out. "Carter, you retract."

"Yes, ma'am." He said with a nod. "So, how are you feeling?" He asked as he looked up at her.

"I'm fine. Why would you ask?" She questioned as she glanced up.

"You've been puking your guts out. And honestly, you're looking like you walked out of the night of the living dead." He said frankly.

"Oh. Thanks." She said as she glared at him. "Just stress and a lack of sleep." She explained. "Shit! Lap pads. I need lap pads." She said as she looked down at the heavy bleeding. "Move!" She snapped at a nurse and she leaned in and began working on the new problem.

"I think you got it." Danny said in shock.

"If course I did. I've always got it." Meredith said frankly. She glanced up to the gallery and her heart stopped. Derek was standing there looking down at her. When she caught his eye, he smiled softly. She smiled and looked back down at her patient.

The rest of the surgery was uneventful. Carter was on his best behavior and refrained from his usual comments and rudeness. Her feet were already aching, her back was sore, and her stomach was growling. She quickly scrubbed out and walked out of the room, running right into Derek.

"We need to talk." He said softly as he looked into her eyes.

"Okay." She nodded softly. He was right. They did need to talk. Avoidance wasn't getting her anywhere.

Meredith's heart was beating quickly as she followed him down the hallway. She didn't want to be broken. She didn't want him to say what she thought he might. Seeing him with another woman last night made her sick. She didn't want to see him with someone else. She just had to decide what she would do about it. They both walked into the doctor's lounge and Derek closed the door behind her. She smiled as she saw a refrigerator.

"What are you doing?" He asked as he watched her opened the door and grab an oreo pie.

"I'm hungry." She said as she looked down at the half eaten pie and grabbed a fork.

"That's someone's pie!" Derek said as she began taking bites.

"And it's good." She said with a big smile as she closed her eyes and savored the large bite.

"You..." He muttered as he watched her. "Some things never change."

"I didn't have breakfast." She said quickly.

"Are you feeling better? Everyone is talking..." He said as he cocked his head.

"I- I'm sure I'm fine." She said with a sigh. "Just stress."

"Maybe you need to get rid of your stress." He said as he stood up and rubbed her shoulders.

"Easier said than done." Meredith said frankly.

"I know." He agreed as he rubbed her shoulders firmly. She moaned as she ate her pie and felt his hands on her. "I didn't know that girl." He said quickly.

"It's fine Derek... If you want to move on." She said sadly as she took another bite.

"No, Mer. I don't want to move on." He said as he stopped rubbing and sat in front of her, looking into her eyes. "I've told you that over and over again."

"But you brought her in with you." She stated, still eating her pie.

"I did not!" He said in shock. "Why would you think that?"

"Adrien said she came in with you." Meredith said almost ready to cry.

"That lying bastard. I didn't even know her. I went to see if you were there. I didn't see you, I figured I'd have a scotch and go home. Then I saw you with Adrien. I didn't want to come over. Not with Lexie there. I didn't want to do that to you. Or her." Derek explained.

"Oh." Meredith said as her eyes started tearing up. "I didn't go there with him. He showed up. I was there with Lexie."

"I never meant to say what I did to you. I was a jerk..." Derek said softly. "I was just frustrated. You... Loving you is frustrating." He said with a sigh.

"I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" She said as she collapsed against him. "I don't want to hurt you anymore." She said as she sobbed. She jerked when her pager went off. "Shit! My patient." She said in shock as she looked at him. "This is bad. I have to-" She said as she ran out quickly.

Derek sat there and sighed. He looked down at the pan on the table. She had eaten nearly the whole half of a pie. He couldn't believe it. But then again, she was under a lot of stress. There was just a small bite left. He picked up her fork and ate it. It really was pretty good. He sat there and absorbed what had just happened. Adrien was playing dirty. He didn't think he had it in him. He looked like such a quiet, innocent man. And yet he was willing to fight. Did he not know that Meredith didn't love him? And now he had lied to her. And now she knew it. Round two goes to the so-called second-rate surgeon.

Meredith stumbled down the hallway in a fog. Her patient had busted a stitch. And he wasn't laughing. That was no big deal. She opened him up, did a simple repair, and he was back in recovery. No. The problem wasn't that guy. Or the second. It was the last one. It wasn't her fault. It happens. After six hours in surgery, she was gone. A grandmother. A mother. A wife. Gone. She walked down to the waiting area and saw the happy family perk up as she neared.

"How is she?" The woman's husband asked as she neared.

"I'm sorry." Meredith said sadly.

"What? What-" The daughter asked as she looked up.

"We lost her. I'm so sorry." Meredith said as she sat there. It killed her. To see people so broken up. So, hurt. So much like herself.

"How?" They asked in shock as they sobbed heavily.

"It was coming off of the anesthesia. She had a reaction. There was no way to know." Meredith explained.

"Did she suffer?" Her husband asked through tears.

"No. No, she didn't." Meredith said as she began to tear up.

"Thank you, Dr. Grey. I know you tried." The daughter said as she pulled her close and hugged her. Meredith nodded as she turned and walked away. It never got easier.

"Are you okay?" Derek asked as she stopped onto the elevator.

"I lost my patient." Meredith said as she began to sob.

"Meredith..." He said as she pulled her close, her face resting on his chest, tears soaking through to his skin. "I'm so sorry."

"I'm so tired." She said as she cried.

"Would you like me to take you home?" Derek asked softly.

"No. That's okay. I think I'm going to stay here." She said as the door opened. "I'll see you tomorrow. Thanks, Derek."

"You'll be okay." He said with a smile as the door shut.

Meredith slowly trudged down the hallway. She needed an on-call room. She needed to get some sleep. She felt like the world was going in slow motion. It felt like she was moving at a snail's pace as she walked pass the nurse's station. The on-call rooms were in sight. Just a few paces.

"Hey." Mark said as he stopped her.

"Bed." She muttered as she kept walking,

"Lab results." He said quickly. "Go get them. Don't make me walk you there."

"Ah." She moaned. He quickly grabbed her arm as they walked down to the lab.

"Meredith Grey." Meredith said to the tech. "I'm here. See? You can go now. I'm here, then I'm going to bed."

"You don't want me to stay?" Mark asked.

"No. Bed for me after this. And I'm sure this will be nothing." She told him

"Fine." Mark said as he kissed her temple and walked away. "Goodnight."

"Here you go, Dr. Grey." The tech said as he handed her the page.

She folded it in half and tucked it into her pocket as she walked down the hallway and to the on-call room. She needed to get a bed, which sometimes was hard to do in this place. She smiled as she saw a completely empty room. She went to the bathroom and sat in the chair as she pulled her shoes off. She looked down at the paper sticking out of her pocket. She began reading. Halfway down the page, her heart stopped. She felt sick. Stomach flopping. She began to sweat.

"I'm- I'm pregnant?" She said in shock as she struggled to breathe. "Oh my god..." She cried out. She sat there, staring into space in shock.

Finally, she mustered up the strength and crawled into the bed. She curled up in the fetal position. Pregnant. She was pregnant. As in with child. As in having a baby. As in a major complication. A responsibility. She hadn't been able to take care of herself. And now- Now a baby. It made her sick as she began to sob loudly. She pulled the blanket over herself and cried. How could this be happening? And more importantly... Who was the father?