Puffgirl1952 the 2nd: yeah she'll be waiting all right.

Princesakarlita411: yeah she needed to talk with him, and he needed it to. And yes she is, you'll see more of that soon to.

LoveInTheBattleField: thanks.

CassieRaven: nope not good, but you'll have to see it for yourself.

Joanne Frances Tiano Cajilig: oh yeah it was needed. And yes things are shaping up.

SerenityxEndymion: cause maybe your bad feeling is accurate. Thanks and hopefully you won't be disappointed with what comes next.

karseneau1: thanks, I knew it'd be necessary especially for what's to come.

Aiyoku: lol I feel the same way on certain things to. No problem, happy to share.

Shay: yeah her reaction was tough to write considering how many different directions it could go.

Kitty: I know the feeling. Lol I read a story once where there were so many obstacles to them having sex that I was feeling their frustration myself. Her reaction will be a douse.

Mamo4eva: no he's not done just yet. Thanks so much, I'm glad you've been enjoying it. 😊

AimlesslyGera: oh yes it will be.

Rjzero00: yeah that wound up being more in-depth than planned but it came out better than I expected. And yeah he was being a bit much with 'knowing' her first, cause yeah he technically did but he didn't 'know' her, 'know' her, just knew her and was associated with those she knew. Sometimes he tended to forget those other stuff as he got so focused on other aspects going on. So yeah he messed up a bit, didn't know how to handle things, like the nightmares or falling in love with Usagi so hence the picking on her thing, as he's smart and mature in some departments he's not so smart or mature in others. Socially speaking he's not greatly mature, so to speak yet but he does work on it, its just in this case he doesn't realize, till its to late on certain issues that he really doesn't know her as well as he thinks he does and now suffers for it and does what he can to fix it. So getting upset with her for going to her friends yeah he's going to feel it cause he doesn't understand how close they all are and that's mostly since he doesn't know her as well as he thinks he does, which is really just something else he needs to learn. Not excusing it for him as its not, just giving my interpretation of it. You may get your wish on the Chibi Usa front. As for the link you mean in ALL of anime/manga? It would have been a lot harder but also to he did have help in a few forms so that will come back to. Oh sweating will be happening.

13 reviews nice, its coming up to the last few chapters here, I'm still debating on what to make the next story on and I only have one suggestion, so if anyone else has any input please let me know. In the end please read and review!

Breaking point ch.33

Usagi POV

The dinner went by swimmingly. We were stuffed so full that I knew I wouldn't be hungry anytime soon on the train ride down. In fact, I was so stuffed that I even asked Mamoru if we could walk around a little bit to help digest it faster. He was a little stunned by that but happily went on a walk with me. "Oh I think I ate enough to hold me over for all of tomorrow to." I joke as Mamoru himself laughs.

"I think we both did." it's nice to have this comradery back. It's like being one again, and hopefully soon become one all over again like we used to. As we walk in through the front doors, I take off my shoes, I don't bother putting the slippers on as I know we'll be grabbing our packed full duffels soon. Instead I decide to put the left-over's in the fridge as just looking at them right now is making me feel more full.

As if that was possible. I hear him kick off his shoes to as he goes into the living room to pick up our packed duffels. "I'll just leave the food here that way when we get back from the resort we have something to eat waiting for us." I let him know as he shouts out, "Good idea. I'll take a look around for anything last minute that we make need." He goes silent after that. I didn't think anything of it till I hear him talking softly that it catches my attention.

Cause he's not talking to me, it's to someone else. I wondered who could be here since very few people have access to his place. As I run through that very short list of people I walk quietly towards the entry point of the living room curious on who it is I hear her words, "I'm really glad that you're winning Usagi back because I've been feeling better." I felt myself come to a near dead stop in my tracks.

Winning ME back…those words kept reverberating through my head like a ping pong ball back and forth as a cold sense of dread washed over me. I couldn't help the narrowing of my eyes as I looked at him. He briefly looked happy as he looks pointedly at Chibi Usa, her voice is unmistakable even as she sounds a tad drowsy. Clearly, she just woke up from a nap on his couch after waiting for him to get back.

It becomes obvious that she thought he was home alone at this point and hadn't a clue that I was here with him. That's when he glances up and sees that I had definitely overheard what she said and knew without a doubt that I wanted to know what the hell she was talking about. It was then that I saw the gulp form in his throat as he tried to swallow it. There was now definite worry etched in his features as he looked towards me.

Mamoru didn't get frog's in the throat nor did he get nervous like that, but THIS had him nervous towards me. Why? I can't remember the last time I made him nervous. Chibi Usa's words start to hit me harder as they still kept repeating themselves in my head. 'Winning Usagi back' and 'feeling better'. Something had definitely happened, and he had been keeping it from me, both of them had and I didn't like that.

Something had happened to Chibi Usa, something to cause her to feel unwell and I knew it wasn't her faking something this time around, no that was easier to spot and he'd notice it or at least I'd hope he would. Plus, after the warning I gave her last time I was sure as hell positive that I put the fear of kami into her if she ever pulled that crap again. No, he looked genuinely concerned about my reaction just as he looked genuinely relieved that she was 'feeling better' and he seemed to know exactly what she was referring to.

This was our future daughter and he kept it, whatever it was a secret from me?! Her future mother! No…I told myself. A naïve attempt I knew to keep the anger at bay, to give Mamoru a chance to explain himself and NOT ruin this evening he had planned out…he wouldn't do this. Not to me…not to us. I kept repeated the mantra to myself. Not after everything that's happened between us over the years. Not especially regarding our future daughter. I forced breathe in and told myself NOT to over-react.

Don't act out or react UNTIL you know more. Listen to him about what's going on. I told myself NOT to panic and listen to him as has to me despite the fact that he looks a bit desperate now and the worry has yet to leave his face. It's as if he's searching for a valid reason that won't piss me the high hell off and I honestly hope he finds it to cause I don't want to be upset. Not today, not tonight out of all nights.

I don't want this evening to be ruined I still want to go with him to the resort, the tickets are still sitting in my duffle near his feet, but now things are feeling way different about what's going to happen and not in a good way. The panic is suddenly hitting me as I ask in lower tones, trying to keep my feelings and emotions at bay till I know more on how to react. "What's going on?" I make clear that I want to know what's going on.

My hands begin to form into fists as I'm suddenly glad the food containers are in the fridge as I suddenly feel like crushing something in my hands. My anger is starting to feel like a living breathing entity as I try to control it, yet something in me says that I won't be able to for long and I desperately hope it's wrong. As he desperately tries to say something that will allow me to release it and NOT be upset anymore, I can tell he's coming up with nothing but hot air and that doesn't sit well with me.

"What is she talking about?" I can't stop my voice from breaking just a bit, even as I speak more forcefully than before as I plead with him with my eyes for this to NOT be something that will hurt us or drive us apart…again. Yet the look in his eyes as he seems to give in and break down tells me all I need to know that this isn't going to end well, "There's been something I've kept from you."

All this time, I can see it in his eyes so easily now. He looks like it's been festering in him, like its bene slowly edging its way to the surface and was waiting for the right moment to break free and be unleashed and he's been waiting to tell me whatever it is. He kept it so carefully hidden all this time I had no idea. The problem is why would he WAIT to tell me something so damned important especially if it was eating away at him the way it obviously was?

Why wouldn't he tell me?! What I do know is had Chibi Usa NOT been here to tell him her 'news' of how she was feeling I wouldn't have known about this apparent deception that the so called love of my life was now telling me. It hurt. Realizing it now I didn't see it before as he had been carefully hiding it and hiding it well, but it was there now. I could see the worry, the slight fear in his eyes as he let it all out.

The mental and emotional wall was down. It reminded me of the nightmares. When he held himself so guarded at first, then he even lashed out at me verbally several times to drive the point home, yelled at me a few times even. Pushed me physically out of his place once even, before he finally gave in and we got back together. This time though when the walls were down, he looked more despondent than then.

Like he was afraid of the reaction he was about to get. I swear if he did something else for 'my own protection' again without talking to me about it I was going to do a hell of a lot more than just throttle him. I wanted to know what the hell is going on this time and I wasn't going to let him off the hook. Why NOT tell me and be honest about it? Didn't we just go through trust issues?! Didn't we just establish trusting each other with stuff and NOT letting issues get in the way? "When I fu – messed up…" he started.

I saw him shot a glance towards Chibi Usa, correcting his language for her which I accepted as that wasn't for her to hear, "And caused this split…" he points between us. I look over at him as he tries to put his words together. I obviously caught him off guard with everything that was now going on, "And believe me I wanted to tell you sooner but…" his voice broke as he began to lose himself in his own words.

So, mine broke to, "Tell me." I demanded, angry that yet again something was being kept from me as his voice and demeanor alone told me this was something incredibly serious that had happened. "Tell me now. And don't leave anything out." I silently throw the order in there as he gulps again. He wouldn't be reacting this way on something small and minute, Mamoru didn't oversell something, and this had him worried.

What the hell had happened to make him react like this? "Chibi Usa started to fade away." He blurted out as I gasped and looked towards the couch on instinct as her pink hair buns lowered down a little bit as if sensing I was looking at her. "Fade away?" I asked, or rather demanded in a sense so I could fully grasp the magnitude of this which was HUGE. This wasn't something to take lightly.

"Yeah…like full on was fading from our timeline fade away. Like not existing fade away." He admits as he struggles to get the words out at first before they begin to tumble out at the end. It was like word vomit came out of him as he put everything out there, everything that he'd been hiding from me, "She came to me in the park after I talked to Motoki, it was a blur of events but she was definitely fading away."

I was stunned. I couldn't put words together right now as I was still listening to him talk, "I got her to a safe environment as I put some of my power into her to help stabilize her life force in our world." he progressed onwards as he went from panicked to defeated. As if he realized that I was going to be upset with him regardless of what he said to me. "That was what she meant." He concluded as I felt myself fuming.

I was beyond stunned and beyond pissed that he kept something so important from ME of all people. I was definitely rattled and all of a sudden as I looked at the duffle bags by his feet. I realized suddenly that the furthest thing from my mind was going to this resort with him now. I wasn't sure I even wanted to be in the same room as him at the moment, but I did want to hear all of this.

I needed to hear all of this. I needed all of the facts before I made any further choices regarding this evening. So, taking a deep breath I forced myself to stay put to listen to him and hope to high hell that this wasn't as bad as it was sounding. I held my composure to myself. Making sure to try to stay back so that I wouldn't get tempted to slap him or tempted to forgive easily either. I love him don't get me wrong, but this wasn't something to take lightly here.

I know he wanted to pull me into him. The need to comfort me was there in his eyes, to apologize in some way, but right now I couldn't be within arms range of him. Not without knowing more. As it was, I felt as vulnerable to his attempts to pacify me as I felt heated up and angered by the facts that had been laid out before me and wanted to hit him for all of this that was being told to me.

However as much as I knew I should stay back and out of both temptation reasoning ranges I felt compelled to go forward and see how Chibi Usa was doing. Brat or no brat she was still my future daughter and apparently had nearly 'died' on us without my knowledge. I stepped towards her as she lifted her head up, "Usagi…?" she sounded slightly fearful of my reaction to this as well and I couldn't blame her.

My emotions were turbulent right now. I looked her over. She looked fine as I couldn't help the need to physically check her over. Like my mother used to do with myself or Shingo as kids to check on us after we had been sick to see if we needed one more day of recovery. She looked stunned by the check in was giving her then relaxed around me as I knew she saw it as my own way of mothering her.

I'm guessing my 'future self' did it in the future and she wasn't used to me doing it to her so she was a little stunned at first. Mamoru it seemed was holding his breath as if afraid that if he came forward and touched me, I would take off. I had to admit the thought had crossed my mind, but I was forcing myself to stay put. To hold my ground till I knew everything. Even as his hands seemed to itch to do so at his sides.

I watched as Chibi Usa after one last cursory check looked fine, just back to being guarded. Like she wasn't sure what was going to happen. To be honest I wasn't even sure right now. I was fighting against myself to stay and finish this conversation I guess would be the term to use. I looked up at him and he seemed to itch to touch me but declined as I clearly wasn't in the mood for whatever cold comfort he had to offer me.

After all whatever power Mamoru had put in her, had done its job alright. The thing that was now throwing me off was how did he keep this secret from me for so long and WHY? If he and Chibi Usa knew then…I came to a sudden realization on WHO else could know about this for him to keep it a secret from me for so long. Those possibilities of not just WHY but WHO all knew crept up into my head. The doubts that had once plagued me, that had been subdued came back in near full force.

It was like a rip tide that came out of nowhere. He said he took her someplace safe, but he didn't specify where. Depending on the park he was at with Motoki and depending on where the arcade was there was only a few options and yet I knew exactly where this 'safe place' was. I just wanted to hear him say it. "Who all knew?" I asked, my voice low and near hollow as I fought back on the emotions that threatened to erupt and send me into a fit of rage against him as he visibly swallowed.

I didn't want that, least of all in front of our daughter who was still a child and watching with anticipation on what was going to happen next. "Usagi…" he tried. I looked up at him, anger etched in my face, "Who?" I ground out at the situation I had been placed in while I tried to reign in my temper at him however, it was becoming exceedingly difficult as I had a feeling I knew what he was going to say. I just hoped I was wrong.

Then I saw the look on his face. He was defeated and done trying to hide it all. "Everyone." You know I had heard some damning words before. Been called some pretty crap things by enemies we'd had over the time since we became senshi. Hell been called some pretty crappy things by Rei and Chibi Usa alike. Even by kids at school when my grades were less than stellar, yet I was able to get past that…to a degree.

No one truly forgets the crap that kids put through other kids, especially when you're that kid that's getting verbally lashed at for shortcomings or particular weaknesses. I just masked a lot of it with crocodile tears and trying to ignore it. This however, that one word that he spoke…that single word alone, held more hurt than I thought some of the harsh words that existed could. And it wasn't a bad word. I said it often enough myself.

No this was because of what it represented. The meaning behind it as I tried to comprehend how to feel and how to react to what I just heard. I mean…for who knew how long now, everyone in that part of our lives, in the part that was meant to be coveted between all of us, the part that shared some of the most dangerous secrets known to man, kept something this big from me a secret. I should have been told right away.

I should have been in the loop since jump street. "When did this happen?" I asked of him, nearly gritting my teeth together as I hoped that it wasn't too long ago. Holding myself close as he tried to say something, anything that would make me understand him or THEM more. That would tell me that the reasons they had were right and that I would have done it to. The problem was there wasn't a good enough reason.

No matter how much I wanted to accept it there wasn't. Not in my book. None that I could think of anyways that would explain or give me reason to forgive as I wanted to…or rather not as I wanted to but as I could IF I wanted to. Part of me did, just to be easy on this but the other part of me knew better than that. The other part wanted to lash out and be upset cause damn it I had a right to be.

"Usagi I..." I glared at him, "How long?" I wasn't going to repeat myself, "About a month…" he winced, "Maybe a little longer…" he looked down at his feet as I gasped and put my hand over my mouth this time as a tiny whimper nearly escaped from the shock of it. For over a month they kept this from me. For over a month those I called friends, sisters in arms and my so called 'soul mate' didn't tell me something so crucial about one of ours.

Our future daughter. She maybe a brat but I deserved to know what was going on with her. Did they truly think that I was so angered by her treatment of me that I would be a monster enough to cast her out and not give a flying fuck about this happening? Did they think that I would turn my back on her? Granted I'm not sure WHAT I WOULD have done at the time or even now. I was in too much shock and anger to consider WHAT I would have done but I did know that this shouldn't have been kept from me period.

Didn't mean that I wouldn't have wanted to do something. I mean she was a brat yeah, but she was still my blood. I still loved the pink haired troll despite all that she's said and done to me. I mean the love between a mother and daughter like us isn't something to easily be measured considering our circumstances and yeah we had our obstacles but regardless of how much I hated her actions and dislikes her attitude she was still my future daughter.

I couldn't erase the love no matter what she did. I mean you don't have to like someone you were related to, or agree with how they treated others, you can even hate the decisions that they make and wonder HOW their related to you, but you'd never stop loving them…or at least you shouldn't. I inhale deeply as I clench my fists together, having released them from holding myself as I felt like I needed to gather some control.

"Why?" he looked to me wondering probably what I meant. I looked up to him with daggers for eyes as his throat seemed to tick in his struggle to give me an answer that wouldn't anger me further. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" I nearly spat through clenched teeth. The rage in me was hitting new levels I didn't even know existed. Usually only enemies got me this upset but this was a new level of anger reserved for that of a loved one.

He stayed silent. The silence was to deafening for me. I snapped at him, "Tell ME!" I could tell the shock of my tone got through to him as he fumbled with his next words, "We were worried." I urged him with my eyes to continue as he looked down at the floor then back up to me. It was as if he was afraid of what I might see in his eyes but he was forcing himself to look at me so that could see how he was feeling regarding this.

The worry over how I'd react next clear as day in his form, in his eyes. He gulped, "Worried how you'd see us telling you about it." He began, his own throat catching slightly. "Worried that you'd see it as me trying to convince you to get back together for her." I couldn't see Chibi Usa's expression as she used the couch and its several cushions to hide from us both at this point as she watched on with rapt anticipation.

I don't think she was afraid OF us, not really, but afraid of what could happen as a result of this verbal confrontation that was spilling out before her very impressionable eyes. I think she was very unsure of what was going on exactly especially since things were definitely on a fine thread right now of what would happen going forward with what we were talking about. I think she was realizing that her words and appearance here unintentionally caused this.

I couldn't blame her really, not this time anyways. She had no idea that we were out on a date. I made sure to keep that information tight lipped these days to AVOID her dropping by unannounced as she used to. No she came here thinking that Mamoru would be here alone so she could talk to him about this issue that had been going on for some time now. She definitely wasn't expecting me to be here, or to witness this. I knew she also knew this was volatile to as she wasn't even trying to interfere with it.

She wasn't trying to take his side or anything. She was very quiet and mute about it all. So when Mamoru met my eyes with his trying to be strong ones I knew he was trying to showcase that he meant everything he was going to be saying as he was putting up a strong 'this is the truth, I swear it' front. So, I held my ground and listened to him, "I wanted to prove to you that my wanting to work things out between us had nothing to do with her." as he pointed towards our future daughter.

She sat motionless on the couch right next to us, as she watched us like we were a boxing match going back and forth. Both delivering our own verbal blows but in the form of truths and reveals rather than actual punches and kicks. I guess she was trying to see what kind of impact this would have on her. I'd read more into that later on for the moment I was trying to keep myself level-headed.

"That this work we've been doing, the improvements between us, the progress we've made to get closer than we were before has been for us." His words held such conviction that I wanted so badly to believe everything he'd just said to me. I saw it in his face, heard it in his voice, the tone in which he was using to express himself. Even his body language spoke of how he was feeling in the moment.

I wanted to believe all of what he said, to tell him that I understood what his goal was, what all of their goals were, that I didn't necessary forgive him right now but that I understood and to head off to the resort. That would be the easy thing to do but my mind wasn't feeling like being ease, it was feeling upset, hurt…among other emotions I couldn't put together right now. I mean he…they all kept something so important from me, so vital and he did it so easily. All those dates we had…and with them all the times we hung out together.

"I wanted to prove to you that my love for you was absolute." His voice became stronger now, like he was speaking from the heart and yes I did believe him. There wasn't really a question on that front. "That I wanted to work towards a better us." A plea in his voice, "That you were who I was meant to be with. That it had NOTHING to do with the past or the future we saw but that it was just US!" his own voice rose up.

I could tell this was definitely and understandably affecting him to. "I wanted to show you that regardless of whatever happened to Chibi Usa that YOU were what mattered to me in the end. That whether we had kids or not that I loved YOU and wanted to be with you and ONLY you." I could sense that Chibi Usa bristled a bit at the slight veiled disregard towards her own existence by Mamoru.

It was something even I'm stunned to hear him say, yet she kept quiet as now wasn't the time to butt in and get in the middle of an incredibly intense discussion that was rapidly becoming a fight between her future father and I. "I didn't want you for a moment to think that she was the reason why I wanted us to work out." I could tell that he was trying to emphasize on all of this as I listened to his side of things.

That he was trying to showcase his point, and express to me that this wasn't for our future daughter but for us together. Yes we were going to have kids but this part was for us to work forward on. This part had NOTHING to do with having kids and I knew that's what he was trying so hard to emphasize on. Yet it also came back to his lying to me for so long and to my face no less.

That's also when it clicked. I looked at him in anger, disgust even for what struck me next, "So every time we went out on a date…" he gulped realizing where I was taking my next point, "Every time we talked…" my voice got lower as I nearly growled out my words. He tried to speak but he had no defense as I continued on, my voice going from a growl to breaking more and more as I pushed my points out.

"Every time that Chibi Usa was brought up in discussion which was several times…" I ground out as he swallowed…hard, "I ah…" no words still as he tried to vocalize something and came up both empty and dry, "You didn't once think that THIS…" I gestured to Chibi Usa, who was currently trying to become one with the couch and its cushions, as I continued on, "Was important enough to tell me! You thought it was necessary to keep THIS a secret from me?!" I wanted to throw something at him.

A shoe, a trinket…something that would hit him, but I had nothing. I had put the leftovers away and took off my shoes at the door. My purse was sitting on the counter near the door but I didn't want to throw it then have the contents explode out and be strewn all over forcing me to pick them up or miss something in the midst of cleaning it up so I had to relent on that desire and NOT create a projectile to throw at him. Despite my desire to do so. Instead I was stuck in self- reflect as I thought back over on everything that happened.

I couldn't help but reach my hands up and grab at my odangoe's as I was starting to give into the urge to pace about like a mad woman. I knew I had every right to as well I was just trying to keep a level head and that wasn't happening. The frustration mounting within me as I needed to do something. I just didn't know what as I gave into the urge to pace about, my bare feet patting on the wooden floors as I stomped around.

I almost spun around on him as I growled lowly in frustration, pacing about and giving him absolutely no way to even TRY to touch me for comfort. I was to upset and didn't want comfort, I wanted to be angry right now. "I thought we were making progress…" I vocalize. I felt so deceived as I looked at him. He looked torn on what to do himself. I suddenly felt so distraught right now, so out of energy with everything hitting me that he could have tried to hug me, and I didn't know what my reaction would be.

My emotionally output was taking a hit today that was for sure. It felt like a ping pong ball as I tried to decide what I wanted to do. Hit him as my righteous anger demanded of me, or take comfort and the only reason I even THOUGHT to do that was because he was the one I normally went to when it came to comfort. For safety and security. He was my knight in shining armor. I was his in a sense to.

Yet this wasn't something my knight would do. It felt like everyone had banded together behind my back to do something they didn't think I could handle knowing about. How could such a future Queen like myself elicit such a response from those closest to her? How could my own guards do this and how could HE do this to me? To not only keep this from me but for as long as they did to.

I had thought we were all past this. "I thought that we were learning to always be honest with each other and learning about each other." I told him as I was tempted to hit him. I seriously wanted to slap the shit out of him. "We have, we are – I promise you that!" his words sounded desperate as he leapt to his feet and crossed over to me. His hands on me so fast that he was like a huge physical force.

I wanted to both shove him off and take in the embrace. "You have to believe me Usagi! I've told you things that NO ONE else knows about me. I've share stories with you that only I knew…and the orphanage…" he amends as I looked up to him. I suddenly glare at him as he says that. As if talking about a few details from our pasts makes up for this when it doesn't, "Is that supposed to erase this?" I ask him.

"Is that supposed to tell me that since we shared secrets that I should accept this secret that YOU'VE ALL kept from me?!" I nearly shrieked in outright anger. "No, but it's supposed to tell you that this to has its own reason for not being known…till now. Please Usagi…I…" his hands on my arms were meant to show me his level of desperation, his level of hope that I would see his side of things…too little too late.

Furthermore, it seemed more out of desperation rather than meaning something genuine. Perhaps I was wrong thought, perhaps it was with more meaning and purpose but right now I couldn't think straight enough to get all of that. His presence was stopping me from being able to think straightforward on this so I pulled from his grasp. Not to mention he didn't get to be near me even in his desperation to try to comfort me, not now. Not after this…I forced myself to breath and take all of this in.

It felt like so much had happened in the span of the last few minutes. Had it really only been less than five minutes since we'd been here? Had we really just gotten back from a nice dinner to this blunder of an evening? "So…" I started as I made a failed attempt to fix my hair of the mess I made of it moments ago, "Cause of our 'break'…" I sniffed back the tears that were threatening to hit me once more as I got the words out.

"Everyone banded together to NOT tell me the truth…about our future daughter disappearing on us all…" he winces but doesn't argue or defend. Then again how can he when he knows I'm right? "Was in an effort to prevent me from feeling like the only reason why you were dating me to begin with was to ensure her continued survival in our world…that about cover it?" I asked him with venom in my tone as I nearly spat the words out.

He nods, "For lack of better terms…yes." He admits as I tighten my fists against my sides. "I see…" I was beyond upset. Here I thought things had changed. That things were different. That he was working to be with me because he loved me. Because he wanted me, and now I find this out. I find out that he'd been lying to my face all this time. All this time everyone I had been talking to they had all known.

I wanted to believe his words, that he really did do this because he loved me and that it wasn't just to save some future child of ours and while any other time I would have understood the reason to want to save her, considering how much of a brat she was to me for so long AND how he had previously treated me…no. I can't…I can't…I felt like I couldn't breathe. Like I was hyperventilating or something.

I had to get out, go home…wait not home. My parents would find it strange that I was coming back home after all of that big excuse stuff we used to get me out. I had to go someplace where the girls weren't and where I could be away from Mamoru. Before I could move though Mamoru tried to take me in his arms again, an attempt to try to assuage me of course. To try to assure me of his side of things, that even though they were in the wrong they meant well.

I'm sure in the beginning it started out that way. It probably started out in an effort to merely help and see what could happen but got worse the longer it got and instead of confessing right away they decided to hold off until Mamoru, as Chibi Usa put it, 'won me back'. While I'm sure that there were good intentions behind it, right now, that's NOT how this felt. It felt…I couldn't even describe it right now. Everything was to jumbled. I had to get out.

"Don't!" I pushed him away and despite the fact that I didn't want to appear weak in front of him the tears wouldn't leave my eyes, "You lied to me. You and the girls band together and kept me out of the loop of this. Once more proving you don't trust me! That you may never trust me…" that fact hit home hard as Mamoru tried to defend himself, "No we do trust you, you have no idea – we do!" he rose his voice.

The desperation in there was palpable as he tried to get me to understand, yet even as I tried to see past the blinding fury haze that was over my eyes it was hard. "You know what's funny, here I thought you were being honest with me this whole time, that you were making an honest effort with me…I want to believe your words Mamoru, but…" I looked over at her and growled low in my anger. I nearly grip and rip out the buns I have my hair up in.

Mamoru sees where I look to and rose his voice to me, "Usagi no! It wasn't I swear!" he then tried to touch me. Without thinking my hand rose up and as angered as I was I hit him. Full on with my hand curled into a fist I punched him. I resisted the urge to apologize to him as he looked at me slightly stunned, as I was, but accepting of the fact that he deserved it. I was so pissing mad that I could only think of one place I could go to, one friend who had been there for me through this.

I shouldn't be going to my friends though. My place was here but maybe not right now. I needed my friend to help guide me on my next move. The debate between Naru and Tyler weighed on my mind as I debated and got frustrated. This shouldn't even be happening in the first place. "I can't believe this!" I cry out, angered by the events taking place as I get tempted but don't give in to kicking the couch.

"Wait the tickets!" I suddenly remember as I looked to his face. A bruise already forming as he winced around it yet didn't so much as come close to touching me again. He looks to me in question, my brain scrambling to wonder about them as something hit me that I hadn't thought of before, "I had assumed that you bought the tickets since it was so sudden but you didn't did you…DID YOU?!" it was more of an accusation.

His face fell as if he was too tired to keep up the act of me figuring things out by now, "They were a gift. Mutual friends." He answered blankly. The senshi were behind it. I couldn't believe it. They helped him get me back…my own senshi took pity on him again and I'm the one hurting…again. I'm trying hard to keep the tears from blinding me entirely so that I can make an informed decision and act on it.

My arms held each other as I backed up out of his living room, "You know what, I can't do this anymore. If you can't trust me then it's obvious that I can't trust you despite the MANY times I've given you chances, all of you. Not again…not again." I scramble back to leave out, I grab my heels trying to put them on and giving up as I realize it'll just gives him time to catch up to me as I get to the door. He barely stops me from leaving out in time.

"Please Usagi I'm begging you!" his voice is of desperation that I don't think I've seen before as I see the look of his plea as his voices himself, "I wanted to tell you, kami – sama I wanted to tell you! You think I wanted to keep this from you?" he nearly demands, his face that of panic and effort towards me knowing how he feels. His voice sounds full of pain, frustration and fear that I grit my teeth and listen.

"It was screaming in my head half the time." He confesses loudly which just makes me wonder more why he didn't, "Then why didn't you?" I demanded just as loudly, "You had so many opportunities and you above all should have been the one to tell me." I snap at him as I feel my fury growing once more. "I don't want to place blame on who gave the order, but we all did agree and abide by it. We thought it would be best to tell you as a group." He explained further as I felt livid.

"Place blame?!" I asked, "Who gave the order?" I demanded of him. He was tight lipped for a moment till I said, "Oh now your going to be silent?!" he breathed, "Minako gave the order and we all followed." That hurt more than I thought it would. I confided in her first. I know she must have had her reason's, but this was…I couldn't process that right now, what I could process was that Mamoru followed suit.

I glared at him, "I don't care if you were given an order by my lead senshi, you're the damned prince of EARTH!" I snapped louder then intended. "IF we're really going by listening to orders here then YOU could have STILL made the call to tell me the truth." I told him as like lightening it struck him hard how true that statement was. I bet he hadn't even thought about it, "Minako is your most trusted - " he tried, but I cut him off, "I DON'T CARE!" I nearly bellowed towards him as he stood there and took it.

"Take some responsibility in this." I tell him, "You could have said SOMETHING at ANY point!" he doesn't move a muscle. I'm not sure if its in anger at himself or if he's merely accepting my scolding. "You had no right to keep something this vital from me." I tell him, my voice lower yet still full on anger. "It was bad enough with the nightmares but this…" I bit my lip as I try to hold back on the tears once more.

"I truly am sorry Usagi…I am. I can't undo it, but we can still work together going forward on this." I wanted to accept it but how often had I done that before? How often did I let things go and slid by? If I did that this time to then it would just tell them that the last few months were for nothing. That all that I wanted to accomplish were for nothing…what message would I be sending to them all if I did that? What message should I send to them?

There were to many questions and possibilities going on in my head, I needed to sort them out by myself. "I need to go." Mamoru tried to still stand in my way, "Please Usagi, let's talk about this." He tried to be gentle about this, he tried to guide me back inside his place, but I was to upset. "I know that things seem bad right now but once we talk this out…" his words turned to garbled verbiage after that.

I knew he was talking yet I couldn't get past what I had just learned. Yeah it would be easy to let it go, to tell him that I understand why he essentially lied to me and kept this from me. Why he and the other's decided what was once again in MY best interest and didn't trust me enough to handle the information. It would be easy to say 'I forgive you', to say 'yeah I get it' and go to the resort with him.

It would be, but easy wasn't what we got. Easy would having been NEVER having had this kept from me in the first place. Easy would have been knowing that the trust I thought was being built and the respect that I thought was in back in place actually being there and not something that was built up under falsehood. I pushed him out of my way, "First off, I'm done talking." He looked at me stunned.

"Secondly, I think you've told me all that I need to hear. Unless there is more to know." I look at him expectantly as he fumbles for words, "I love you." And yes while I do believe him and while yes I do love him I don't believe he trusts in me and at this point I'm not sure if I can trust in someone who once more, after everything STILL decides to not trust me to handle this. "I love you to Mamoru…" I admit as he did do his fair share of confessing.

I touch his face, caressing it in a move that feels bittersweet before I grip his chin to look at me, "Three, while I'd love nothing more than to slap the crap out of you, you don't deserve any more of my energy tonight." His face falls, and I see pain in him as he knows he must see it in me to. I can't help but let him see the pain he's caused. "And lastly…" I need to make sure I get enough time in for a quick getaway.

So I quickly undo the bottom button on the door as I prepare to dart out, "I'm not asking." I move past him, shoving him off as I shove the door to his place open, reach down and twist the button back and shut the door behind me. With my shoes in hand as I debate whether to take the stairwell or the elevator. I initially go to the elevator since it'd be faster but then I see Mamoru coming towards me.

I was unwilling to wait and didn't want to get sidelined for it, so I took the stairs and flew down them as fast as possible. I couldn't even keep up with knowing if Mamoru was behind me or not. I just kept going as tears started to stream down my face till, I burst out on the side through the door of the building. I briefly wondered if I should transform just to get away faster in the moment, but knew he'd be able to sense wherever I was so I decided against it and decided to take off.

No one saw me as I slipped my shoes back on and slipped into the crowds, blending in as I walked into the nearest park and found a bench to sit on. It was there that the tears came out fully and I wondered how a night that was supposed to be so wonderful, a night that I was sure was going to be amazing turned out this way. One thing was for sure…it did turn into an evening I wouldn't ever forget.