Chapter 31. Second chance
Chrome felt like she was going to have a heart attack. She could feel her illusion womb getting weaker every second. Chrome became petrified as the pain in her abdomen was now unbearable and a warm wet thing was starting to drip between her thighs. Chrome didn't want to see what it was. She knows what is happening but she couldn't face it. Chrome could see Erica suddenly rushing toward the phone with a very pale face.
Chrome felt like her world ended as she finally saw her blood dripping down to the floor.
Mukuro looked at the little girl with shock. He couldn't believe this. The little girl used to have a strong will to live…if she didn't have that will, she wouldn't have been able to survive this far in the first place. But right now…Mukuro could see in her blank and depressed blue eyes that she didn't have any more wills. Instead it was those eyes when a person just wanted to die. He had seen those same eyes from many of the children when he was experiment in the Estraneo Famiglia.
Mukuro removed his hands from the little girl's neck and instead tried to embrace her. He just felt like he needed to hug her. However the little girl immediately back away from him, refusing the warmth he was trying to give. This shock Mukuro even more than when she placed his hands on her neck. The little girl refused the warmth from him? She had always wish and pleaded any little warmth from him…but not anymore? Mukuro realized this was much worse than he expected.
"Why are you doing this?"
Mukuro's voice came out much louder and harsh than he wanted to. He didn't meant to say it that way but the current situation was making Mukuro impatient. The little girl was refusing to give flame to Chrome, which was quickly making Chrome's illusion womb too weak. The miscarriage could happen any second now. He was already helping Chrome's illusion womb to strengthen with his own flame but he could sense his flame wasn't enough. It was only slowing down the process.
The little girl wasn't responding at Mukuro's words. She was just sitting down at the ground with her head low. This really bothered Mukuro, feeling an incomprehensible impatiently and anger. The little girl used to focus on any little words he says as she was curious at what he was saying. However right now she acts as if she didn't care anymore since she was going to die.
Mukuro roughly grabbed the little girl's arm and pulled her towards him. Their blue eyes met again and Mukuro yelled at her.
"Give your flame to Chrome right now! Don't you understand you'll die if you don't?!"
[That word, Chrome came out again. Who is Chrome?]
"Chrome is your mother's name! Give your flame to your mother right now!"
Mukuro shouted as soon as he sense what she was thinking. It gave Mukuro a little shock of realization that the little girl never even knew her mother's name. Because of her teenage appearance, it made Mukuro easily forget she was actually an unborn baby.
[Why does she have to give her flame to her mother? Her mother hates her. Wouldn't that mean her mother would hate everything about her? Even her flame?]
"That's nonsense! There isn't much time right now! I'll explain later, but right now just give your flame to your mother!"
[Flame… Flame. Flame! She was now feeling sick and tired of hearing about flame! Her father always talk about flame and he always seemed more interest on the flame than her! All she ever wanted from him was just being loved! But he always interest about flame and she was now sick of it! Why can't he just leave her alone?! Why does she have to hear about flame again when she just wants to die?!]
Mukuro froze in shock. This was the first time he was seeing her angry. She was crying again but her tears were caused by anger. However Mukuro could sense the deep sadness and despair inside her.
[She remembers how her father would always be concern if she would absorb her mother's flame. He would always get angry at her whenever she even tries to absorb a little amount of flame from her mother. It always made her stop with fear but…stopping her desire and need was always painful. She hates that feeling of lacking flame in her body and the strong urge to absorb flame. Flame…it was nothing but a pain to her.]
Mukuro suddenly thought her flame was both a blessing and curse to her. She was able to exist and survive because she had a powerful flame in the first place. However because of her powerful flame, she always had to suppress her enormous urge of absorbing flame. Or else she could kill her mother. But…come to think of it…had he ever tried to explain this reason to her? Mukuro realized she never even know the reason why she should always suppress her urge of absorbing flame. She just did, because Mukuro told her to. Because of this, it made her make a rash and twisted decision.
[I don't want it anymore!]
"W-Wait!"
Mukuro tried to stop her as soon as he sense what she was trying to do. However he couldn't stop her. She starts to give her flame to her mother again. But the problem is, she was giving away ALL of her flames. This would definitely harm Chrome. But that wasn't Mukuro's concern right now. Giving away all of her flame? That was the same as committing suicide.
Mukuro turned pale as he saw the little girl…his daughter coughing out blood and collapsing to the ground. Mukuro immediately embrace her into his arms. Mukuro felt like his heart stop. She wasn't breathing anymore.
Chrome cough out blood as she suddenly felt an enormous amount of powerful flame suddenly bursting inside her. It was too strong and too much. The powerful flame felt like a fire from hell, burning her from the inside. It was too hot and painful. Her heart was pounding very fast like it would explode.
"Nagi!"
Erica immediately grabbed Chrome who almost collapse to the floor. Erica was surprised that Chrome's body was so hot. Erica couldn't hide her horror to see Chrome still coughing out blood. Erica didn't know what to do. She already called the foundation medical team in urgent when she noticed Chrome was having a miscarriage. But the medical team haven't arrived yet and Erica knew it would be too late. There was nothing she could do.
'Flame?'
Unlike Erica who was in panic, Chrome immediately felt hope when she recognized this sudden flame is her daughter's powerful flame. Yes, her daughter's flame was currently giving her pain but she could finally strengthen her illusion womb again. Chrome tried to use her daughter's flame…but her daughter's flame was resisting to follow Chrome's will.
Unlike the past, her daughter's flame was currently impossible to control. However Chrome didn't give up. This was her only chance to stop her miscarriage! Chrome tried to control her daughter's flame, using her own flame. However her daughter's flame refuse to follow her flame and instead starts to attack it. Two flames were now fighting inside Chrome. It was giving Chrome an enormous pain that she felt like fainting.
Chrome clenched her teeth very hard, trying not to faint. However the pain was too much that Chrome unconsciously grabbed Erica very hard out of pain. Chrome could feel Erica embracing her even though she was grabbing Erica too hard. Her mother was trying to help her. Chrome was truly and honestly very thankful that Erica was with her right now. If she was alone, than it would had been a lonely and fearful fight.
Chrome was trying to tame her daughter's powerful flame but it was no use. Even though she was using every little bit of her flames, it was impossible to win against her daughter's flame. Her daughter's flame was way much stronger than hers.
'Please, please, please!'
Chrome begged and pleaded. But her daughter's flame was acting like a wild beast, refusing to be tame. Chrome knows her daughter's flame won't kill her, but it would soon disappear. If her daughter's flame disappear, there was nothing that could stop her miscarriage. She can never allow that with her dying will!
"!"
Chrome suddenly felt a new flame inside her. No, it wasn't new but a secret flame that she could hardly ever use before. It was her special flame. Chrome never knew how to control her special flame before. However right now, she was able to use her special flame like her ordinary flame. As if her dying will to save her baby finally made her special flame completely submit to her.
Chrome immediately used her special flame to tame her daughter's flame. Her daughter's flame tried to fight back again but when the two flame met each other, her daughter's flame suddenly turned gentle. Her special flame starts to embrace her daughter's flame.
Chrome suddenly felt a deep sadness and despair from her daughter's flame. Chrome realized this was her daughter's emotions left inside the flame. Chrome started to cry. She knows she was the reason of her daughter's pain and Chrome felt so sorry toward her daughter. Her special flame wrap her daughter's flame as if Chrome was hugging her baby. Soon the two flames started to combine with each other.
Chrome never heard of two different flame combing into one. However Chrome didn't wonder why. That wasn't important right now. The important thing is she must save her baby! Chrome used the flame to strengthen her illusion womb. And it was working! She could feel her womb was quickly turning stable! Chrome could also feel an enormous amount of flame returning back to her daughter. As soon as Chrome realized everything would be all right now, she couldn't take the pain anymore and fainted.
[She suddenly felt something very comfortable and warm coming inside her. It was her flame? No, this was somehow different. It was her flame but something changed. Her flame was powerful but also immature and unstable. However the flame that was returning to her was powerful but also mature and stable. The flame she had always needed and wanted. She didn't felt the urge to absorb flame. Because the reason to absorb flame was now fulfilled. For the first time she felt satisfied of having a whole flame.
The life energy the flame have, was giving her life again. She let out a deep breath and started to breathe again. Her weak heartbeat was now strong again. She opened her eyes but her sight was blur. Her sense was slowly coming back. She felt something warm and wet dripping to her face. When she could clearly see again, she saw her father crying. She also realized she was being tightly hugged in her father's arms.]
"Thank God… Nagi…"
[Her father murmured in a sob and embraced her more tightly. She couldn't understand what was happening right now.]
"I'm sorry, I love you."
[Her eyes widen as she couldn't believe what she just heard.]
A moment ago.
Mukuro looked down at the little girl who was lying lifeless in his arms. She wasn't breathing. He couldn't feel her heartbeat whether it was too weak or eventually stopped. Her eyes were closed. She was lifeless. The red blood stained on her white dress made her look more lifeless. He couldn't understand what was happening. No…he was denying what just happened. But looking down at the lifeless little girl…Mukuro finally accept what just happened.
"…Little girl?"
Mukuro carefully called her. However there wasn't any little response or movement from her. Was she dead? Did she just die? Mukuro suddenly felt something break inside him. The thick wall he made toward her was breaking into pieces. Mukuro could finally face his honest emotions toward his daughter. Mukuro started to tremble and carefully embrace her harder.
"Wake up…please wake up…"
Tears started to fall down and he felt an enormous pain of losing someone who was very precious to him. Why did have to realize his feeling to her when everything was too late?
He cares her. He loves her. She was his daughter. He was her father. Deep down in his heart, he was already a father who loves his daughter. But he had refused to face his honest emotions. Making another large regret because of being dishonest with himself.
He remembers how his daughter would always timidly come near here. Wanting any little acceptance and warmth from him. Showing her love toward him. Deep inside, Mukuro felt she was a sweet and loving child. Unconsciously, deep down in his heart, a fatherly love was growing. But before it was big enough for Mukuro to realize it…he rejected her and hurt her countless of times. Now when he realized it, it was too late.
He opens his mouth to call her but nothing came out. Because he doesn't know what to call her. His daughter didn't have a name. Wait no, she did have a name. Although it wasn't given, it just happened to become her name. Mukuro hesitate for a moment but soon finally called her.
"Nagi."
She doesn't move. Mukuro felt his heart torn apart.
"Nagi… Please wake up…"
Mukuro started to cry. Is this the feeling when a parent loses its child? Losing a family? Mukuro eyes widen as he suddenly realized he had a family, which he never even imagined or expected in his life. But was already lost as soon as he realized it. Mukuro never knew there was this kind of painful sorrow a human could feel. He felt like he also want to die.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry… Just please wake up… Nagi…"
He starts to remember all the hurtful things he did to her. And he gave so little love to her. Most of all he tried to kill her. No, maybe he did kill her. He hurt her too much that she didn't expect any little warmth from him anymore. If she still had that hope, she wouldn't had commit suicide. If he had already told her the reason why Chrome was rejecting her calls, then she would had never had a misunderstanding that she was unloved from her mother.
Why does he always realize his feelings when everything is too late? Please not this. He would sacrifice everything so please don't take her away. For the first time, Mukuro prayed.
*Cough.
Mukuro suddenly heard a cough from her and she was starting to breathe again. Her lifeless body was gaining life again. She opened her eyes. He could see her blue eyes with life in it. Mukuro felt an overwhelming relief.
"Thank God… Nagi…"
Mukuro embraced his daughter more tightly. He was crying more heavily now. He has gotten a second chance. And he wasn't going to foolishly mess his second chance again just like how he did to Chrome. Although it was an awkward and unnatural thing to him, Mukuro let out his honest emotions to her.
"I'm sorry, I love you."
He could feel Nagi flinch. He knows his sudden changed behavior was confusing her. Nagi starts to struggle, trying to get away from him. Mukuro understands. He tried to kill her today and even shouted at her when she was already terribly wounded inside, making things worse. It hurts that Nagi was rejecting him, but Mukuro accept it. However that doesn't mean he would leave her to suffer alone again. Mukuro tightly hugged his daughter, refusing to let her go.
[She gave up. She tried to escape from her father's arms but it was no use. She struggle, hit him, scratch him and even bite him. But her father didn't let her go. She doesn't know how long she had been struggling but she was now exhausted that she couldn't even move anymore.
"I'm sorry, I love you Nagi."
[He keeps repeating that word and she just wants to close her ears and stop listening to it. Just stop giving her hope! She doesn't want to get hurt from her parents anymore! She doesn't understand why she is fine again and why her father suddenly turn so…caring and warm. Although he was embracing her tight, he wasn't hurting her. Although how much she was rejecting him, he wasn't stopping to love her.]
"I'm sorry, I love you Nagi."
[She didn't believe her father's words anymore but…it was warm. Tears started to fall down from her eyes. She could feel her father's hand gently stroking her head.]
"It's alright to cry. Don't worry. Everything is going to change now. I love you Nagi."
[She starts to cry out loud. She doesn't believe her father's words. She lost trust toward her parents. But she just wanted to cry when she heard that. Cry out all the sadness, despair, anxiety, fear and anger she had felt and kept inside her. She cries and cries until she fell asleep.]
Mukuro was exhausted. It took an hour to make Nagi give up on trying to run away from him. However it was worth it. Mukuro looked at his daughter who was now sleeping in his arms after crying.
Mukuro made a faint laugh as he gain his sense again. He really must have been in panic. His daughter never died because if she did, then she wouldn't have been able to exist in the illusion world. However it was a wakeup call for him. When he thought she died, it was then he realized how much he cares and loves her. It was better this way than realizing it after she truly dies.
Everything is going to change now. He was going to make it that way. First, he needs to resolve the misunderstanding Nagi has that she wasn't love by her parents. Secondly, he needs to make Nagi meet with Chrome again. Mukuro knows that won't be easy since she was afraid of getting hurt again. Lastly…
Mukuro looked down at Nagi. He could sense an enormous and powerful flame in her. When this flame came back into her, Nagi was able to live. She also didn't felt an urge to absorb flame anymore. Mukuro recognized this flame. It was Nagi's powerful flame and Chrome's special flame, combine into one. How is this possible? He never heard two different flame completely combining into one. However the key was Chrome's special flame.
It was also the hope to save both Chrome and Nagi's life. None of them have to die. Chrome could live and Nagi could be born.
In one of the parlor, Kyoko and Haru were sitting very nervously. Both of them look at each other, unsure what to do. It was very awkward and even uncomfortable. Because of an unexpected person who was with them. Rokudo Mukuro. He was sitting at the other side of the table with the girls.
It was awkward and uncomfortable because Kyoko and Haru never really talked with Mukuro before. Although Mukuro was dating with their friend Chrome, Mukuro and the girls never gotten close. Also Kyoko and Haru was feeling guilty that they couldn't do anything when Tigern attack Chrome and even kidnapped her. Both of them remember how Mukuro went crazy and search everywhere in the Rango mansion and the nearby forest, trying to find Chrome. Therefore, Kyoko and Haru couldn't face Mukuro.
Although Mukuro was the one who came to the girls, he was just sitting quietly, without even touching the cakes or tea that was served. He looked like he was hesitating to start the conversation. After a few minutes of deadly awkward silence, Mukuro finally open his mouth.
"…How do you treat…small children?"
"Excuse me?"
Kyoko asked confused. Both of the girls looked very confused at the unexpected question.
"Small children… No, more specifically a baby. What is the right way to treat a baby and what must be avoid?
"I'm sorry… I really can't understand your question."
Kyoko thought Mukuro would talk about Chrome, but why suddenly a baby out of nowhere? Mukuro let out a deep sigh. He actually didn't want to explain it but…to have the proper help from the girls, he would need to make them understand and know what is going on. But doing something out of his character was emotionally painful.
"…There is a special place call an illusion world where illusionist could meet each other in their minds. I've been meeting my child in the illusion world."
"Hahi, your child?"
"The baby Chrome is currently pregnant with."
A silence was filled in the room for a moment. Both Kyoko and Haru were stunned for a moment as their brain couldn't process at what they just heard. However after finally understanding it, both of them let out their shock and surprise.
"You can see Chrome's pregnant baby?! Wait, is Chrome all right?"
"Are both of them all right?! Chrome was badly injured when we last saw her!"
"Both of them are fine…for now. Also Chrome seems to be in a safe place with someone taking care of her."
Mukuro knew Chrome was with Erica. But Mukuro didn't tell this to anyone yet and he wasn't going to tell it soon either. Fixing the misunderstanding with their baby was much more important and urgent right now. Also the Estraneo Famiglia would surely be searching for Chrome since they would know she was his weakness. The fewer who knows where Chrome is, the better for her safety. At least for now.
Kyoko and Haru both let out a deep relief. Their friend was safe! It was the best thing they ever heard since Chrome was kidnapped. As their excitement finally settle down, they finally remember what Mukuro had just said about the baby. Haru let out a surprise.
"Hahi! You can see Chrome's pregnant baby?! Like you can touch the baby and even talk with the baby?"
"Yes…"
"Can you tell us about Chrome and your baby?"
Mukuro let out a sigh, feeling uncomfortable at Kyoko's request. Having a chat with the girls wasn't what Mukuro wanted. However they were Chrome's friends and he knows how much Chrome deeply cares about them. Just because of that reason, Mukuro decided to be nice to them.
"…She looks just like her mother."
"It's a girl? How much does she look like Chrome?"
"Can you give us a more specific details? Does she look as cute as Chrome?"
"I usually sees her as a thirteen year old, little girl. She has purple hair just like Chrome and…blue eyes. Except that she's half Italian and has blue eyes, she almost look identical as Chrome when she was thirteen. Her personality also seems similar like Chrome…easily blush, shy, timid and caution… She has a…kind heart…"
Mukuro carefully tries to descript about his daughter. But Mukuro didn't like how he descript her. There didn't seemed to be a correct word to perfectly descript her. She was a precious being that can't be replace with anything else. Also it was the first time Mukuro was ever trying to descript about someone who was precious to him. His daughter was very precious, sweet, loving, kind, cute and thoughtful. Mukuro sometimes wonder how he could have a child like her, when he was one of the most cruel and sinful person in this world. It was a relief that Chrome's genes express more than his on their daughter.
Kyoko and Haru looked at Mukuro with a quiet surprise. Unknown to Mukuro, he had a warm smile at his face when he was thinking about his daughter. The girls never expected they would see Mukuro express fatherly love on his face. They heard Mukuro and Chrome had a disaster broke up, but maybe things might turn out well.
Kyoko and Haru actually didn't understand about illusion and what a mind connection is. However for ten years of spending time with the Vongola, they learned just to accept things than trying to understand it. Kyoko and Haru decided to seriously consider Mukuro's question. Kyoko asked first.
"You've asked how to treat a baby and what should be avoid?"
"Yes…I don't know anything about how to treat a baby."
Mukuro knew he did many wrong things when he treated his daughter. However just because he knew he did a wrong thing doesn't mean he knows what's the right thing. He never learn that or even experience it when he was young. Kyoko and Haru started to give their thoughts.
"Well, we actually don't have much experience with a baby either. But we do know how to treat little children."
"We've took care of Lambo and I-pin when they were just five years old. Also there are some common things when to treat a baby and little children."
"Babies and little children are very emotional and that's a natural thing for them. They can't control their emotion until they get older. Because of that it's important to always be patient to them. They don't know how to express what they want except showing their emotions."
"Some adults ignore little children words because they can't talk well. But little children and babies are very sensitive and they can easily catch the person's attitude toward them. Ignoring them would definitely hurt their feelings. Showing a negative things like rejection, anger and discomfort will really, really hurt them. Most little children or babies immediately cry when they get those negative response."
"In the child's eyes an adult is a much bigger and stronger being. Yelling or even a rough and big movement could easily scare them."
"Therefore, you should always treat them with patient and love. Never raise your voice, talk smoothly at them. Give lots of love to them. Never show negative attitude toward them."
Mukuro felt a stab at every words because it was clear he did everything wrong. It was almost painful to hear this. But Mukuro carefully listen to every one words the girls were saying. He needed to learn. Kyoko and Haru kept giving every advice they knew and Mukuro listen to it carefully. After hearing a lots of things of how to treat a child, Mukuro carefully asked an important thing while looking down at the scratch marks on his hands.
"If you did something wrong to the child…and there is a misunderstanding between them…how do you fix it?"
The girls went quiet. They could easily guess something bad had happened between Mukuro and the baby. But they didn't ask what happened because they could see it was very sensitive and private. Kyoko and Haru started to deeply think about the solution. After a few minutes of silence, Kyoko finally answer.
"I think you should truly apologize and try to explain everything."
"But she's an unborn baby. She hardly knows words. Will apologizing and explaining things really help when she can't understand most of it?"
"How can we be sure the baby really can't understand it? Sometimes it surprise me how much a little child actually really understand what the adults are saying. A baby could be the same. Also it would be better to try than just doing nothing, thinking it might be useless." Haru answered.
Mukuro went silent. From his memories, Nagi could hardly understand anything what he was saying. However she did started to learn and understand his words because of their mind connection. And she did seemed to know and understand more these days. Sometimes she really did seemed to understand almost everything what Mukuro was saying to her. Especially the last time they met.
Mukuro shook his head realizing how much a foolish thought he was having. Nagi could definitely understand his words. Unlike the past, his daughter was understanding language the more they met. Also using the mind connection, talking to her will definitely make her learn what he was saying to her. Although it could take a lot of time, Mukuro made a conclusion it was possible to explain and make her understand. But he knows it won't be easy.
"…I better get going."
Mukuro said as soon as he decided to immediately meet Nagi in the illusion world again. However Mukuro stopped himself from getting up as he noticed the girl's face was a bit nervous and uncomfortable. Mukuro noticed why. He didn't touch any of the cakes or tea. And he was suddenly trying to leave. The girls were misunderstanding that Mukuro was unpleased with them. Mukuro hesitated for a moment but sighed and let out his secret…because he was thankful to them.
"…I can't eat it because…I'm having morning sickness."
Both Kyoko and Haru's eyes widen in surprise. They heard the father could have the morning sickness during the mother's pregnancy. However they never imagine they would see it for real.
"Hahi is it bad?"
"Yes… I can't eat nor drink anything."
"That's…um too bad."
Kyoko said, not sure how to comfort a man who was having morning sickness. Mukuro tries not to raise his eyebrow out of irritation. He felt like starving to death these days. Having an awkward comfort from the girls wasn't going to make his mood better. Mukuro let out a quick thank you of helping him and left.
Chrome was walking no almost running in the illusion world. She was searching for her baby. Chrome could sense her baby was here somewhere in the illusion world but she can't find her. She can sense her presence but she can't find her. It meant her baby is here but she was hiding and refusing to see Chrome. Chrome felt a huge pain in her heart and tears started to fell from her eye.
"Please come out! Please! I never meant to say those things to you!"
Chrome shouted at the air with a desperate voice. But there wasn't an answer coming back.
"I'm sorry! I never meant to hurt you!"
Chrome kept running around trying to find her baby in the illusion world. This felt like a terrible nightmare. Chrome wish this would rather be a nightmare than reality. But the truth was cruel.
Chrome drop on the ground as she couldn't take the pain and guilt from her heart anymore. Tears were unstoppably falling to the ground.
"I'm sorry…I'm sorry…Please come out…Please…"
She wanted to hold her baby in her arms so badly. Apologize until the baby understand this was all a misunderstanding. She never hated her. She loves her more than anything. But because of the foolish and rash mistake she made, she gave a terrible pain to her baby and almost led to a miscarriage. Chrome couldn't hate herself more than right now.
[She watch her mother a bit far away from her, hiding. She was afraid to meet her mother. She could hear her mother was saying something but she refuse to really hear it. She was afraid to hear another hurtful words from her mother. It terrified her of just imagining to hear those angry and hatred words toward her again.
But it was painful to see her mother sad and crying. Even though her mother had badly hurt her and knows her mother doesn't love her… She still deeply loves her mother. It hurts to see her mother showing so much agony. She truly wanted to go to her mother and comfort her. She wants to stop her mother crying and being sad. But she was too afraid to approach her mother.]
Chrome woke up from the hospital bed. She was hospitalized in the foundation secret hide out again. Chrome could see the bed sheet was wet by her tears. Her real body was also crying when she was crying in the illusion world. Chrome started to cry again. Chrome kept going back to the illusion world trying to find her baby but she failed every time. Her baby was hiding from her. Chrome could feel her guilt eating her up.
She has to do something. But what can she do when she can't meet her? Time will never solve this. Chrome felt so lost and afraid.
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I never meant to say those words to you…"
Chrome kept murmuring, wishing her baby could hear this.
[Although she was able to hide from her mother in the illusion world, she can never truly avoid her mother. Because they were literally one during the pregnancy. She can sense her mother's sadness and guilt from her dark place. She can hear her mother's fast heartbeat caused by those emotions. She can hear her mother crying. She wish her mother would stop being sad. She deeply cares and loves her mother.
She stayed very still in her dark place. She wonders why her mother was so sad. Why was she sad because of her? She couldn't understand. Was it because she survive again? Her mother doesn't want her so maybe that's why. She felt uneasy at that thought. She can't commit suicide again because she lost the courage and rage to do that again. Also the new flame inside her was slowly recovering her health. Her dark place was currently very stable too.
She could hear her mother saying something. It felt like her mother was saying this to her. She tries not to hear it. She was afraid what kind of hurtful words it would be. She suddenly wanted to cry out loud. She doesn't even know if she wants to live or die anymore. Living with this thought was a pain to her. She wish she doesn't need to feel pain anymore. Pain seems to always be in her life now.
She suddenly felt someone calling her to the illusion world. Since the person will was very strong to bring her to the illusion world, her little, immature mind couldn't resist it. She was forced into the illusion world again. She hide herself refusing to meet the person. It would be her mother again. Her mother kept trying to see her in the illusion world multiple times.
Using her Mist flame, she hides herself. Her Mist flame could disrupt her mother from sensing where she really was in the illusion world. She stayed still for a while. She could sense someone wandering around the illusion world. She suddenly noticed the illusion world was very quiet. Her mother would usually always say something loud while trying to find her. She opened her eyes and could see her body wasn't small but big. Her body was always small when it was her mother who brings her to the illusion world. Her body was always big when it was her father…]
"Found you."
[She flinched in surprise at the sudden voice behind her. She carefully looked back and saw her father. How did he find her?]
"I'm impress how you're learning to use your flame on your own."
Mukuro was truly astonish about it. It would be impossible to find her when she was hiding in the illusion world using her flame to hide herself. However Mukuro was one of the strongest illusionist in this world. Mukuro was just too skillful. However even for Mukuro, it did took some time for him to correctly sense where she was hiding.
[She couldn't even understand most of her father's words but she could sense her father was currently feeling fine by the soft tone in his voice. But she was still afraid and nervous toward her father. Even though he told her he loves her the last time they met… She was too broken inside to really believe that. She was also afraid her father would suddenly change his behavior again.
She stayed still with her face lowered to the ground. She didn't wish nor expect anything from her father. She could clearly remember how he showed so much anger and hatred toward her, saying that he never wanted her…while trying to kill her. She won't be surprise if her father suddenly tries to kill her again.]
Mukuro let out a deep sigh full of guilt. He could sense what she was thinking. The pain he caused to her was too much that it really broken her heart. She wasn't approaching him for warmth like she always did. Even though he told her that he loves her, the painful memory was much strongly imprinted inside her. Mukuro didn't know if he should feel relief that at least she wasn't running away from him.
There was another problem. Unlike the past, she wasn't trying to understand what he was saying. Instead she was even refusing to understand it. It would be much more difficult to solve the misunderstanding because of this.
Mukuro carefully stretch his hand to touch her head. She had always like that and would always blush in happiness. However Mukuro stopped his hand at the air when he saw her flinch in fear and starts trembling.
No, he shouldn't feel relief that she wasn't running away from him. She wasn't running away from him because she gave up at everything. She would stay still even if his hands grab her neck. She was willing to just die in his hands if he tries to kill her again. Mukuro realized his daughter's mental state is much dangerous than he thought it would be.
Thank you for the reviews
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tukikami02
Maashiro
Douceur Tendresse
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Guest(sanaumu)
I'm sorry I can't answer back your reviews. I'm having a busy year(We all must be having a busy or difficult days this year) and I actually don't have much time writing back to the reviews.
I think writing more stories while I can would be better for the readers. Hope you enjoyed the chapter.
PS. The baby's name was already decided even before I wrote this story. I sorry for some of you who request the baby's name, but thank you for sharing it.