Hello! Hope everyone is ok out there, anyone who may be reading and beyond. I made such an epic balls up of posting last week, so let's hope I can get it right today. Sorry about the ending last week… As always let me know what you think, I hope you enjoy it, as much as you sort of can…
P.S. I'm not a doctor, as a teenager I was a big Grey's fan, so I tried my best… but no science to it at all!
Usual disclaimer applies.
Once again, a small warning, there is some talk of a car accident, injuries, injuries to a child.
Chapter 41: Are You with Me?
When Tony and Steve arrive at the hospital, they are directed to the waiting room on the appropriate wing. Bucky is sat with Andi's head leaning on his shoulder and Natasha and Bruce are sat waiting beside them. Steve and Tony are breathing heavily, from their run through the hospital. Steve stares at Andi and she lifts her head, looking confused between him and Bucky, he just shrugs, 'not me, I kept my mouth shut.' Tony wanders in and finds a seat. Steve remains stood by the door, pale and waiting on Andi. He turns to his best friend, looking annoyed 'you should have told me. Jesus, Bucky!'
His friend spits back, 'why? Who are you to them? You've been AWOL up until now.' Andi stands, pushing a hand against Bucky's arm, calming him as she walks towards Steve, grabbing his fore-arm and pulling him roughly into the hallway. Tony warns, 'be nice, children.'
Once outside, Steve exhales, 'where are they? Are they ok? What happened? Andi, please tell me.' Andi rubs her face, her fight gone. 'Amelia was driving to drop her off at nursery and another car hit them. Rosie is in surgery; her arm is pretty messed up. She whacked her head real bad. She has cuts all over, on her face, her legs.' Steve looks horrified. 'Amelia?' He asks nervously. Andi looks off into the distance, spotting a vending machine, reliving the last visit to the hospital. 'Andi! Amelia? Is she ok?' Andi's eyes refocus on him, 'she's fine, just a piece of glass in her leg, but remarkably, she's fine.' Steve looks back inside the waiting room for her. 'She's with Rosie, they took her up almost an hour ago, Mia's on the floor waiting.'
Andi looks down sadly, 'Rosie… her… her bone was showing on her elbow, Steve and she passed out, it was like she was asleep but not, she hit her head so, so bad. She looked awful, it was horrible. There was blood all over her, I only just got here in time to see her, she was knocked out for a scan and then the operation. She's so small and there was blood on her dress, she will be so upset.' Andi is sobbing as she recounts Rosie's marked dress. Steve pulls her close and holds her in an embrace, she cries loudly and sniffs into his shoulder. He whispers reassurances and ignores the stares he's receiving from staff and visitors. 'I can't lose them, Steve, do something? Anything, please?' She pleads quietly, he looks around and despite the room of heroes, there's really nothing any of them can offer.
Bucky watches through the blind slats, turning to Tony, 'why is he here?' Tony is flicking through a magazine, 'he should be here.' Natasha mutters, 'depends which Steve you brought with you.' Tony throws the magazine back onto the pile, leaning forward, 'did any of you see her? How bad are we talking?' Everyone mumbles and shakes their heads.
A young man walks into the room and stops, staring at the four of them. He looks at them, blinking, unsure if he's seeing this correctly. He gently backs out and leaves.
Bucky pushes his hands through his hair roughly, 'she's just a child.' Bruce leans over, 'it was an accident, Barnes, they happen. She's young enough to bounce back.' Bucky looks down at his metal arm and says 'but she doesn't deserve this.' He sighs and sits back, Steve is now holding Andi in an embrace and Bucky can't find it in himself to be angry. 'Think this will knock some sense into him?' Natasha asks. 'Could be too late,' Bucky mutters, he can't remember feeling this bitter towards Steve. He expected more of him, he's let him down for the first time in their lives.
When Andi returns, she has stopped crying, she silently sits beside Bucky. She leans against him and he wraps an arm around her shoulders. Steve peers in, there is a spare seat beside Natasha, but she shifts and puts her coat there, maintaining eye contact with him. Tony smiles patronisingly and pats a seat beside him. Steve shuffles in, eyes constantly flicking towards the door. Tony is sifting through a Fisherman's Monthly Magazine, 'I've never been fishing, my old man was always too busy with work.' Andi closes her eyes, surrounded by a room of daddy issues and testosterone, she just wants to see her sister and niece.
Steve looks around the room, surprised they all made the effort to come. Then he pictures Rosie, her happy smile and bright blue eyes and he knows that's why. Steve pushes his hands into his hair and racks his brain for a way to help. He feels truly helpless, there's nothing he can offer.
'What happened? Was she distracted?' Steve asks in desperation, Andi sits up straight, 'are you insinuating Amelia did this?' Steve looks surprised, 'no, I just mean, we all get side tracked, Rosie might have been doing something…' Andi leans forward shouting and interrupting him, 'you asshole! How can you turn up here and blame my sister for this! She's given a fucking statement already, to the real authorities, she owes you no explanation.' Bucky tugs her back, pulling her back in her seat, 'it's fine, he didn't mean that.' Steve opens his mouth and Bruce just shakes his head slowly. Steve looks at Natasha and she offers him nothing but a hard stare in return. They settle back into a silence.
Almost two hours later a doctor comes in, Andi sits to attention. 'Rosalyn Miller's family?' They all stand and the doctor raises an eyebrow, 'are you all together?' They nod and mumble agreements.
'Are you her mother?' He asks Andi, she shakes her head, 'I'm her Auntie, we live together, her mother is up there in the room, waiting.' He looks around the group, 'there's no dad, it's me, it's just us.' The doctor hesitates and looks like he might leave, Andi begs him, 'please, please tell me something.'
The doctor looks at her sadly and his eyes glance to the others, double taking on Tony Stark, who waves. There's lots of medical jargon and Andi squints to understand.
Tony interrupts 'so what you are saying Doc, is that she's out of surgery, still under, pins in the arm, more scans and a cast tomorrow?' The doctor nods, 'she was very lucky, could have been much, much worse.' Andi steps forward, 'I need to see her, please?' He agrees and asks her to follow him. Andi quickly grabs her stuff and squeezes Bucky's hand. Leaving without glancing back.
Steve watches her go, stepping towards the door, a gentle hand lands on his shoulder, he turns to see a kind faced Bruce. Steve nods and understands, fighting against his better judgement, he retakes his seat. The others sit and continue to wait, Tony's moved onto a gardening magazine and regales them with tales from the potting shed. Bucky stares angrily at Steve, chewing his gum and blaming him for this mess.
Time passes and eventually Andi texts Bucky, 'she says she's still knocked out, but will be fine, she said we should all go home.'
Steve exhales and looks to the sky, grateful to anyone that is listening. 'That's great news,' Bruce says kindly, Natasha nods at Bucky and he looks over at his best friend, who appears to be silently praying.
Tony, Natasha and Bruce eventually disappear, Bucky and Steve are the only two in the waiting room. Bucky has his feet on the coffee table and Steve is staring at an array of health posters, numbly. 'What if I'd lost them, Buck?' Bucky scoffs and Steve looks at him. Bucky explains, 'well, you have lost them, haven't you? You pushed them away, in case they got hurt or if you did? And now look, they did get hurt and you weren't there, do you feel better?' Steve puts his head in his hands, 'God, I need to see them.' Bucky watches him, biting his lip angrily, 'I heard you got doused with pudding,' Steve looks up quickly, surprised by the comment, thinking back to Andi in the canteen. 'Yeah, she's certainly not afraid to speak her mind and she wasn't wrong about much.' Bucky double takes, impressed to see some genuine remorse.
Bucky starts to rummage for change for the drinks machine and then he gets another message and quickly stands, Steve watches him slowly, wondering where he's going, 'I'm going up, taking Andi home.' He checks his watch, 'it's getting late, you should go as well.' Steve shakes his head defiantly, sitting back 'no way, not until I see them both.' Bucky sighs, 'fine, but make it better not worse.' He leaves, without so much as a goodbye and Steve sits in the dimming waiting room, alone in silence.
Steve's eyes flutter open, as the room brightens, a nurse shows in a family and he quickly realises he must have dozed off. He moves his jacket from the chair and smiles with tight lips, politely at the new people. He checks his phone and some time has passed since Bucky left, he also spots a message from his best friend. It simply reads '13-2E.'
Steve shoots up from his chair and hurries out of the room, navigating the halls quickly, running to the elevator, hitting the button. He pleads for it to hurry up and nearly stands on a man as he exits. He silently thanks his friend for the help and he rides the elevator anxiously, thinking of all the time he spent with the girls in one. He remembers Amelia asking if they would have fallen in love, if they had to take the stairs. He smiles and suddenly he realises that this is all that matters, making sure they are ok and trying his best to sort this awful mess, that's all that matters.
Once he steps onto the ward, he realises it's for children. It's hauntingly quiet for a place that should be full of chatty characters. There's cartoon animals on the wall and painted arrows on the floor. He follows the signs and arrives outside a room, there is a window, but the blind is down. He hovers in the hall and tries to regain an even breath and settle his knotted stomach. He steps close to the door and gently taps it.
Amelia looks up and is surprised to see Steve's face through a small window, she nods a little and he steps in. Steve walks through and closes the door, as he turns, he stops abruptly. Rosie in on her back, her heart monitor beeping steadily. Her arm is in a metal cage, pinned and stitched together. There's a stitch on her cheek and she's pale, the life drained from her, as she lies there sleeping. She looks a stark contrast to her normal buoyant self and Steve feels winded by the sight.
Amelia is sat in an arm chair beside her, head tilted towards the bed. Steve's eyes scan her and he thinks she looks tired, her eyes fluttering to stay open. He looks at her shirt and her chest is covered in dry blood. Steve closes his eyes, understanding that it belongs to Rosie. Steve stands awkwardly and eventually Amelia points to the other chair opposite the bed. He sits and watches the little girl.
'How long have you been here?' Amelia suddenly asks. Steve looks up and they make eye contact. 'Same as Buck.' Amelia nods, 'you didn't get my message?' Steve shakes his head, frowning and when he checks his phone, sure enough there is a short message from Amelia asking him to come, the time is before anyone else was alerted. He sighs and wonders what the point of technology is, if it fails you when you need it. He looks at Amelia, once again, she's watching Rosie intently.
'Thank you for the message.' Amelia nods, but doesn't look at him. Steve looks at her, she has no shoes on, her legs bare, her skirt is rolled up a little and her thigh is bandaged. 'Why did you message me?' He asks seriously. She swallows and takes her time answering, 'Rosie asked for you in the ambulance and we are...' Amelia laughs bitterly, 'well, I don't know what we are. But you're still something to her and she is what matters.' Steve's face creases, 'you both matter.' He leans forward and holds his hand out to Amelia, she looks at it briefly and shakes her head, wiping her eyes. He drops his hand and looks back at the small girl. 'She will be fine, Amelia, she's such a strong little girl, she will be fine.' Amelia nods quickly, shaking tears from her eyes. He hears her mutter, 'God I hope so,' almost like a whispered prayer.
He asks some questions about her arm and Amelia explains a previous break made everything complicated, how she passed out, that her head wound is superficial and she will need a cast for a couple of months. She points out other cuts, bruises and struggles not to cry in the process, reliving the ordeal.
The room falls into silence and Steve looks around at the clock, the window, the sink… 'She's fine, she's fine...' Amelia gently chants to herself from her seat in the corner of the room, 'just a broken arm, just a broken arm.' Steve calls to her and she doesn't react. Suddenly she looks at him, 'you must think I'm making a big deal, I know it's just a bad break, but I thought it was worse, I... she's my world, I nearly... everything she would have missed... I just keep thinking what if? Going over every outcome, I can't stop my mind.' She leans forward in the chair, chewing her thumb nail, watching a sleeping Rosie. 'Wake up…' she whispers hoarsely. Steve tilts his head, he understands, when he heard FRIDAY'S message, he instantly thought the worse. Amelia's voice cuts through his thoughts, 'there are children and parents here with so much more to deal with, we were lucky, so, so lucky.' Steve smiles as he looks at Rosie, imagining her voice calling to Lucky.
Quickly there's a shift in atmosphere and Steve hardens, 'what about the other driver?' Steve looks angry and Amelia pacifies, 'no, he made a mistake, could have happened to anyone, he came over, he helped, helped her, I can't be mad.' Even Steve can't find it in himself to be quite as understanding.
He watches Amelia grab Rosie's hand and lean into her bed. Amelia looks thinner in the face, she looks withdrawn and tired and Steve knows that he is to blame. Steve looks down at Rosie's battered arm, stapled and stitched, pinned in place and tied down. He winces at the lacerations and he gently lifts a hand onto the bed, carefully caressing her fingers with one of his, slowly, like the hand on a clock. He looks up at Amelia, afraid that she will tell him to stop, but she is staring at Rosie's face.
After a while, Amelia says 'you should go home' Steve shakes his head defiantly. Amelia lets out a long breath, 'Steve, what do you want from me? You've ignored me for almost three weeks and then there's the other thing.' Steve looks at her, 'Amelia, after Peggy, I just got scared. I don't feel like I deserve to be as happy as I am when I'm with you and Rosie. I also didn't want you to feel the grief I felt, and the thought of doing London all over again for you or Rosie, well it was enough to make me step back. And look what happened, you still got hurt.'
Amelia nods, she can see Steve's rationale, but his delivery is appalling. 'Talking,' she says suddenly, 'talking always helps, radio silence isn't helpful.' Steve nods dumbly, Amelia then coughs, 'what about Sharon, I saw you, you know, kissing.' Steve shuts his eyes. 'It was nothing, she kissed me, she was grieving, she took me off guard, I didn't know what to do, but I didn't want it, I don't want her.' The last line is loaded and Amelia shrinks into her chair, she's missed Steve, but he needs to do more, it feels like he took a break from them.
'I am so sorry, that you saw that, I had no idea.' Amelia sniffs and nods a little, 'no, we left pretty quickly. We shouldn't have gone.' Steve shakes his head desperately, 'no, what you did, coming to London, it was more than I deserved, I am sorry I treated you so badly.' Amelia nods a little and leans forward, pulling at the bedding, making sure Rosie is covered and warm.
Steve takes a deep breath, trying to be honest, 'I've lost everyone, Amelia. And I am now at a point where I am losing them a second time.' Steve laughs a little, wiping his brow, Amelia pauses, she can appreciate that, she knows the feeling of being left behind. She swallows audibly, that last thought reminding her that he left them. 'You could have everything, Steve. Everything. We were all in, you, me, Rosie, but now... it's just not the same.' He swallows at her firm words, 'I was blind, I'm so sorry, truly sorry.' Amelia nods distractedly, barely hearing his words. 'I thought I was protecting you, but now I see…' Amelia sighs, 'pushing me away, I could maybe get over, but kissing someone else? Really?' Steve stares at the ground sadly, looking up as Amelia rustles in her chair.
'Are you ok?' He asks, nodding to her knee. She shifts and covers it, 'it's nothing.' Amelia gasps, burying her face in her palms, 'Mr Goose is in my car, on the back seat. Shit, my car… I can't even think about that right now.' Amelia sits back and looks at the ceiling, 'maybe we did this all too quick.' Steve looks over sharply, realising she means them, their relationship. Steve shakes his head vigorously, 'no, I don't agree. Time, it's not the same for me.' Amelia looks up at him slowly, half covering her eyes with a cupped hand. He continues, 'the universe likes reminding me, that life is too short.'
They fall into a lull and Steve wonders what to say, how to break it. 'How's the house?' Amelia squints at him and his efforts, 'I can't do this with you, I can't be normal, there is no normal anymore.' Steve feels like he's been slapped and he slouches back, resigning himself to the silence, it's better than the constant reminders of how he messed everything up.
After some time, there's no sound, just a gentle beep from a monitor and Steve asks, 'do you really have another date?' Amelia looks up surprised, 'what?' this answers his question and Steve brushes it off, 'nothing, don't worry.'
A loud noise starts and both adults jump, Amelia relaxes and say's 'it's me, sorry, hang on.' She digs in her plastic bag of belongings and finds her phone. Sagging as she reads the screen, she sniffs and wipes her eyes. 'Dad! Yeah, she's still out…. Couple of hours… I'm ok, thanks… no, I don't think so…' Steve watches Amelia, she's squinting and pinching her nose, he can tell she's trying to keep calm and sound strong. She relaxes a little and smiles sadly at something her father says. Then her eyes panic and she looks at him, before looking away. 'I'm not alone, Andi's here.' Steve's brow creases and he wonders why she would lie, it stings, because he already knows the answer. 'Love you too,' she concludes and Steve looks away quickly, as she hangs up. He misses her saying those words to him.
Her voice catches him off-guard, 'they want to come down, be here for us, but I said not until she's home, you know?' Steve mutely nods and suddenly feels very out of place, like it's someone else's family and they don't recognise him.
Amelia drops back in her seat and watches her daughter, alternating between biting her nails and wrapping her hair around her fingers. Steve watches her and knows the timing is terrible, but he needs to make amends.
'I want to go back, be with you all again. Tell me it's not too late?' Steve spills and Amelia looks at him in surprise. She opens her mouth, but a twitch catches her eye between them. Rosie's foot flickers, like a candle and her lashes start to flutter. Steve and Amelia stand and lean over her, her mother pushes her hair away from her face, whispering her name repeatedly. Rosie wakes up slowly, muttering and looking around before focusing on the two adults, peering down at her. She half-smiles at her mother and then grins at Steve, she looks like she wants to reach for him and Amelia explains that she can't move her arm until tomorrow, that she must keep very still and that they were in a bad accident. Rosie's lip wobbles and Amelia says 'but, you are ok, tomorrow we will get your arm patched up and you missed a room full of Avengers, checking to see if you were alright.' She giggles and asks 'will I look like Bucky?' Amelia nods and Rosie turns to Steve. 'Are you still sick? I missed you.' Steve looks at Rosie, touched by her words. 'No, I'm feeling much better, hopefully, I will see more of you from now on.' Amelia smiles at Rosie, but can hear Steve's false promises and tries desperately to ignore his soothing voice.
A doctor appears sometime later to make checks and Rosie starts to cry, terrified by the examination and the pain 'it hurts mamma,' she pleads to Amelia. 'I know, I know, little girl, but you're doing so well, so well.' Amelia kisses her good hand and holds it in between hers. Steve leans in a wipes a stray tear from Rosie's cheek, 'Bucky won't believe it when I tell him how brave you are being.' Rosie nods aggressively at this and sniffs in her tears, eager to impress Bucky with her courageous story. Steve watches Amelia across the whimpering little girl, equally worried about her. The doctor reassures them everything looks good and Amelia nods animatedly at her daughter, 'everything will be fine now, I promise.'
Hours drag past, the doctor is long gone, with the occasional visit from a nurse and Rosie has fallen back to sleep. Steve stays and conversation is stilted and limited between the two adults, Amelia drifts off now and then but wakes herself with a start, reminding herself of where they are. Steve watches her when she falls asleep, it feels as if momentarily everything is normal with both girls dozing. He watches Amelia sleeping, struggling to get comfy, shifting from side to side, legs up, legs down. 'I'm sorry…' he mutters to both girls.
A nurse comes in, 'how we doing in here? Oh, mommy's getting some sleep, that's good. You don't fancy a few winks, dad?' Steve looks up quickly, surprised by her warm tone. No one has ever called him dad, a few weeks prior he allowed himself to wonder if that is where they were heading. He recalls Rosie shouting love you and then quickly remembers the polite lady asked him something. He debates what to say, 'umm, well she's… I promised her mom I'd stay awake, keep an eye out.' She nods, checking the little girl over, 'you need a blanket?' He shakes his head, 'thank you though.' Steve looks around the room, leaning forward in his seat, 'I don't know how you do this all day,' he asks. She smiles, 'there are tough moments, horrible moments and amazing moments. Fortunately, the amazing ones outweigh the bad ones. Your work must be the same?' Steve looks at her, surprised she knows who he is and isn't making a fuss. 'Relax, lots of late nights around here mean lots of trashy magazines.' Steve nods a little, watching Rosie again. 'My little boy is a big fan though.' Steve looks back to the nurse, 'how old is he?' She stops and lights up, 'he's eight, keeps me on my toes, he's at home with his dad, he came off his bike this afternoon, so lots of ice cream and sympathy.' Steve laughs with her, 'but you know we can't keep them wrapped up forever, and even if I locked him in his bedroom he would find of way of hurting himself, I'm sure he does it for the ice cream.' Steve thinks about what she just said, how you can't always protect people. 'What's his name?' The nurse fills in Rosie's chart and smiles over at him, 'Bradley.'
Steve leans against the head rest, 'well, say hi to Bradley from me and remind him, his mom is the real hero.' She chuckles at that, 'I like the sound of that, I'll be in favour for at least a week. I'll leave you to it. Just keep an eye on her, that will hurt in the morning.' She slips out, dropping a blanket on his lap and nodding towards Amelia, who is falling down the chair at an awkward angle.
In the early hours, Andi creeps in, surprised to see Steve. Amelia is awake now and watching Rosie intently. Steve looks up and Andi is holding a balloon, it's Iron Man and he can't help but think she did that on purpose, but he knows Rosie will love it, when she wakes again. He's relieved not to see Bucky and his disapproving glare.
'Oh, right, ok. Mia, I came to swap, just two hours, go home get sorted, come back. You'll be here for the cast. You look a mess, it's all very Alien,' Andi says pointing to Amelia's blood stained shirt. Amelia shakes her head, 'no way. Where are my clean clothes?' Andi shrugs, 'yeah, bit of an error, I didn't have my keys, I've been with Bucky, couldn't go home. You have my car.' Amelia sighs loudly, groaning in frustration, 'well go and get them!' Andi shrugs at her, 'she's ok, Mia, I really think you need to sort yourself out, you will scare her.' Amelia looks offended and like she might shout or argue, until Steve gently calls her name. Andi looks at him poignantly, 'you should go too.' The tone is not as warm and despite Amelia's strong protests, eventually they relent and find themselves in a hospital elevator.
'Can't this thing move any faster,' she begs. Amelia stands as far away from Steve as she can get, in the tiny metal square. She stares at the changing floor numbers and grasps her bag tightly to her chest. Thinking, this is nothing like the medical shows she watches on TV. Her eyes flicker to Steve, he's staring at the floor and his hands are neatly folded in front of himself. She grimaces bitterly and pictures herself begging him, just like a trashy soap opera. She wants to slap herself for watching too much television and for being so desperate, but she knows she wants to say exactly that. She allows her eyes to find him and he looks warm and so inviting, he always looks perfect and she looks down at herself and cusses, she's far from that. For her moment, her tattered love life allows her to forget the horrors of today. But her stomach churns and drops, recalling the events.
Her phone sounds and she looks at the screen. Steve looks up and she can feel the weight of his stare on the side of her face, 'you're popular,' he jokes lightly. Amelia exhales and puts the phone away, 'it's Bucky.' Steve tenses a little and can't help the flare of jealousy that flashes through him, he finds himself relieved that she didn't pick up. Knowing Bucky saw them before he got to, is hard to swallow.
When Steve looks at Amelia again, she is shaking, biting her lip so hard, it turns white and muttering to herself. He reprimands himself for being so selfish and as she darts forward to press buttons, he catches her hand. 'Please? I can't leave her, I need to be here, let me go back, I have to go back,' she pleads. Steve shakes his head and softly replaces her arm at her side. She's rocking on her feet and agitated, 'Mia…' he starts, but she visibly flinches and he starts again, 'Amelia? She's fine, she's asleep, the doctor said she would probably sleep through with the meds, Andi is here, she swore she would call, you need to go home and change, you want to look like her mom when she wakes. Don't you? You'll be an hour, tops.' Amelia nods at his rational words and soothing tone, 'yeah, ok, yeah, you're right.' He hesitates and steps back, dropping her arm and resuming his position against the wall. Amelia keeps staring at the floor and mutters a quiet, 'thank you.'
Once in the parking lot, Amelia turns to Steve, 'Well, I'll see you around.' He scratches his neck anxiously, 'I don't actually have a ride, Tony left with the car.' Amelia huffs and wonders why the universe won't give her a break, she nods towards Andi's car.
As they belt up, she explains 'mine's a wreck, I'll take that R8 around now.' Steve chuckles lightly, 'don't joke, Tony would.' As she starts the engine, he grabs her hand, 'Amelia, I mean it, I want to go back. If I could do this month again, I would, I've made such a mess.' Amelia nods, but shakes her hand free, pulling out of the hospital lot.
Amelia arrives at the familiar Avenger Tower carpark and she and Steve exit the car.
'It doesn't feel right, leaving her,' Amelia rubs her own arms and Steve stands beside her, 'she's sleeping, Andi is there, you will be back before you know it.' Amelia is wearing her mac and her blood-stained shirt sits in a bag on the back seat. Steve looks down at her and steps in closer, he strokes her hair and her blue eyes gaze up at him.
She starts to cry lightly, 'you left us, Steve.' He nods sadly, 'I nearly lost her, forever.' Steve cradles her head and pulls it close to his chest. She cries lightly into his shirt and he holds her tightly. When she pulls back, he's stained with tears and makeup. Amelia makes an effort to brush it off. 'Sorry, I...' she doesn't know what she was going to say, looking up at Steve his eyes are trained on her, she feels lightheaded and confused. She's so tired, it's been such a long day and Steve is warm and feels like home.
He leans down slowly to kiss her. He gently kisses the corner of her lips and pulls back to stand. Amelia looks shocked and touches her lips. She watches him, he opens his mouth to speak and then she leans forward, kissing him on the mouth more forcefully. She pulls away and starts to apologise.
Steve grabs her waist and pulls her close, backing her up against the driver's door. He kisses her deeply, pulling at the tie of her coat. Her hands are on his shoulders, pulling him towards her more. She hisses as her thigh touches his and he thinks about pulling back, until Amelia moans as he kisses her neck. He unbuttons her coat and slips his hand under the coat, over her tank top and gripping her hips. She throws her head back and puts her fingers through his belt loops, pulling him against her. He lifts her thigh a little and stands between her legs. Kissing over her shirt and down between her breasts. Amelia spreads her legs further, so that he can get closer. Amelia whimpers as he caresses her bare arms and kisses her passionately. In her mind this feels right, safe, familiar, like home. Steve slides her across the car's side and fumbles to open the back door.
Pushing Amelia into the car, she sits on the edge of the seat, hair tumbling over her shoulders and heavy eyes. Steve stands between her thighs and pinches her waist, stroking her flaring hips and kissing her lips. He gently pushes her and she lies on the back seat and he climbs in, hovering over her. shoving the coat off her shoulders and lifting her good thigh so he can fit. He reaches to cup her face, 'I've missed you so much,' he mutters and Amelia stops abruptly.
'I can't do this.' She can feel the bag with her bloodied shirt beneath her and Steve stops, staring at her. She taps his chest, telling him to get off. He backs out of the car. She steps out, pulling at her skirt and straightening it, 'we can't just go back.' She slams the back door and stands in her skirt and tank top, she looks cold and fragile. 'Oh God, this is so embarrassing, I'm not this desperate.' She's bustling around, trying to find her keys and get back into the driver's side. 'This is so wrong, my daughter is in hospital, and what? You think, poor Amelia, she's down in the dumps, she will give me another shot.' Steve looks wounded by her words and tries to defend himself. 'Steve, you broke my heart, I opened myself up to you. I only wanted to be there for you and you shut me out so far, that you forgot I existed.' Steve steps close, 'I never stopped thinking about you.' Amelia laughs, 'that means nothing! I thought I knew you Steve, but this isn't who I thought I was dating.' Amelia tries to unlock the car and it won't open, she continually presses the button and eventually slams the window with her hand, cursing. She turns to Steve with a wet face and tears in her eyes, 'I loved you so much.' Steve hears the past tense and his heart tightens. 'I thought this was it, you, me, Rosie, maybe a… maybe more in the future and now look? All for what? Self-preservation. Well congrats, you will die lonely, and not happy, I can guarantee.' Steve winces at her cold tone and brutal words. The door still won't open and Amelia growls her sister's name, knowing the car is a worthless heap of junk.
Amelia turns to Steve fiercely, giving up with the door and looking for a new fight, 'tell me! If you could click your fingers, would it be Peggy here and not me?' Steve gawks at her and stutters, she lifts a hand and says calmly, 'that's all I need to hear.' Steve places a splayed hand against the car door and inadvertently opens it with the force. 'It's not what you think, listen to me, I was going to say…' Amelia turns sharply and looks at him, 'I can never compete, Steve, I am not her. I will never be anything but this.' She looks at herself and could cry, she looks a mess, her daughter is in hospital and to top it off she nearly had pity sex in a car park. 'Look I don't really want to play second best, third, if you count Sharon, but I certainly won't do it to Rosie.'
The car finally opens and Amelia throws the door wide. 'Don't come to the hospital, please, Rosie needs to understand things aren't the same anymore.' Steve walks to the car, 'they are the same, I made a mess, but they are the same, I love you, I love Rosie. We can be a family.' Amelia stares at him and reaches for the door frame. 'My family is at the hospital. I need to get back to them.' She begins to close the door, looking into his eyes, 'goodbye, Steve,' she says seriously and he considers how she means those two words. Before he can respond, she is pulling out of the lot at high speed and he stands in the dust from her tyres.
The next morning Steve is staring at his uneaten breakfast, considering Rosie and her injured arm. His mind continuously flashing to Amelia, pressed up against him, her cold arms, her bloodied shirt, her hurt expression. He's sent some flowers and a teddy bear, to the hospital, but expects Andi will put them in the trash if she gets chance. Bucky's not home, Steve knows where he is and that hurts even more. He pictures Amelia telling him that they can't be second best, he wishes she knew just how wrong she was.
Tony comes in and stands opposite him, 'did you speak to her?' Steve sighs and doesn't look at the older man, 'come on, Rogers, I expect a little more from you.' Steve says nothing, Tony opens his mouth but FRIDAY interrupts, 'Sir, they need you in the security office.' Tony checks his phone and smirks, 'looks like you better come as well, Cap.' Steve looks up, surprised, but has learnt better than to not follow Tony's warnings.
The pair take the elevator, Steve is silent and Tony rambles endlessly, 'I'm thinking of sending something, a gift basket, as it were, what do you think? Disneyland tickets? Too much? Oh, not enough?' Tony sighs, 'well, you better make it up soon, I need that pumpkin pie in my life.' Steve finally looks up at him and Tony is surprised to see how exhausted he looks; his brow is pinched and his eyes are red. He takes pity and asks a real question, 'did you see the kid, she awake yet?' Steve inhales deeply and stares at the ceiling, 'yeah, she's awake, very scared.' Steve's teeth clench, until his jaw aches, thinking about Rosie crying and screaming for her mother as the doctor checked her arm last night. Tony nods and gives up, joining Steve in his silence, he lifts his hand, thinking of patting his back or shoulder, but he drops it again, unsure of himself.
They arrive at security and enter a dark room full of screens, it's manned by six colleagues and four are hunched over a monitor, laughing.
'I'm over paying, if this is what you class as work,' Tony announces. The group scatter and Tony can see the screen. He leans in close, one arm propped on the desk and one on the back of a colleague's chair. 'Liam, is it?' Tony asks, reaching into Liam's bag of popcorn. 'I hope you don't watch me, like a god-damn movie premiere, is there always popcorn in here?' No one answers. 'Now what do we have here?' Tony asks, watching the monitor. 'Say, Cap, do you recognise this horny pair?' Steve huffs and walks overs, stopping short at the images of him and Amelia against her car last night. His eyes widen as he watches himself, clutching her thighs and stroking her face, kissing her passionately. There's whistles and chat around the room.
'I'm gunna need a copy of that, son,' Tony tells Liam. 'Tony...' Steve warns. Tony puts his hand up, 'I'll take the master, Liam, see to it. More leverage over the righteous man here.' Liam gets to work quickly, 'are you sure, sir? The master will mean the tape for the night, what if something else happened?' Tony watches the footage over Liam's shoulder and suddenly the kissing turns to fighting and Tony looks up at Steve, secretly. He can see Amelia is waving her hands furiously and wiping her face and he assumes she's crying. 'No, no that's fine, it's a risk I will take, I'll look after it.' Steve rubs his face anxiously, 'I swear Tony...' his cheeks flushing and Tony ignores him, once Liam has run off the tape, he gives it to Stark on a drive and Tony announces to the room, 'no one hears about this, otherwise there will be mass firings and well, let's face it, no one will believe you,' he looks at Steve, 'I mean, come on?' Tony leaves the room and Steve begs him all the way to the labs to get rid of it.
Once inside Tony puts the drive down and fitting an Iron Man glove, he destroys the tape, it lights up with flames and simmers, gently smoking. Steve grabs a fire extinguisher. Looking up a Tony in confusion, 'I've done this enough to know, that is not the answer. Now, put it right. They deserve more and I am sick of your pouty face.' Steve drops onto a stool, 'I tried.' Tony shakes his head, 'that's not trying, you mounted her in the parking lot, when she was at her weakest. Do better. They both deserve better.' Steve's shoulders sag, knowing this is a new low, Tony Stark offering relationship advice.
AN: There we go, thanks for reading, let me know what you think, if you fancy leaving a comment. Not a very pleasant situation but a story I wanted to tell. Poor Amelia, I personally can really relate to that feeling of I love you, but I don't want to give in too easily. I hope it was realistic and true to the characters,
Rosie will be ok
There's a few chapters left, hopefully everyone can sort their crap out before then! I mentioned I've written another story, a follow up (dunno why I'm dodging the word sequel), I don't know if I post that as a separate story, or just tick right over and make it clear it's different story but the same "universe" and characters?!