A/N: Thank you! I am loving all these reviews, they are certainly keeping me motivated! This is for all of you - thank you :)
I am sorry it's short and not great. LONG day at work. Then I decided to clean my house top to bottom, and mow my lawns. My arms are so sore. They are actually shaking as I type this hahahah it's all I can manage lol
I LOVE all of your reviews , especially the ones ranting and with questions and theories. I LOVE IT. :)
Reasonable Doubt – Chapter 27
Jen POV
"You're here again." I don't convey anything with my tone as I approach Mouse with a raise of the eyebrow.
"Yep. I was hoping I would run into you."
"You did?" I smirk as he blushes, growing flustered.
"Uh, no – not like that."
"Like what then?" He pauses, appearing to think of something to say.
"It's okay if it was like that." It takes a moment for my words to register, before he can say a word in response, I narrow my eyes at Jay walking in alone.
"You!" I growl as I march towards him angrily.
"Erin looks like crap." I accuse him.
"Jen, I'm not in the mood."
"I don't care. You think Erin's in the mood to spend a day in court? To go home and pore over case documents? To be around you right now while you're being a jackass? No."
"I'm not asking her to." I narrow my eyes dangerously at him.
"You never have, and yet here she's been."
"She lied to me."
"Get over it. I told you not to hurt her, I warned you. She's been through a lot." My stare is piercing and holds him to his spot.
"I know."
"No. You don't know. She's been through more than you can imagine, but you haven't stopped to care about her lately have you?" His mouth opens, however he closes it choosing not to reply, looking down in shame.
"You're hurting her. Remember, I told you- don't hurt her, no matter how hurt you are." I cross my arms over my best.
"I don't want to hurt her."
"If that was true, you wouldn't be hurting her." My shoulders raise in a shrug.
"This really isn't your business."
"You know what? Maybe you should take all that anger and rage, and direct it at someone who deserves it. Let me give you a hint, it's not Erin. How about to your cheating bastard of a brother?"
"Leave my brother out of this." I pause weighing up my response when I see Erin finally emerge from the ladies bathroom, more make up on her face.
"When this is over, you'll regret it all. Mark my words, and she'll probably take you back. Even though she shouldn't." There's a flicker of something in his eyes I can't register before it disappears.
Erin POV
"What was that about?" I whisper to Jen as she saddles up next to me, my eyes follow Jay as he walks into the courtroom.
"Nothing."
"Jen." My tone is warning.
"I was just reminding him of a conversation we had. Where I warned him not to hurt you."
"Jen, I'm the one who hurt him." I look down at my phone trying to distract myself.
"Snap out of it Erin. The good you did outweighs the bad. He's hurting you, I can see it. Not just by pushing you away – he's treating you like shit. You're fighting to save his life; he's the jackass who can't see that. Can't appreciate that."
"Jen." I whisper blinking back tears.
"Shit, sorry. Game face."
"Game face."
"You got it girl." She bumps me with her shoulder before nudging me towards the courtroom.
"Detective Harris. Good to have you back." I smile at him, pushing all problems with Jay out of my mind.
"Miss Lindsay." He nods at me; I square my shoulders knowing I'm on higher ground this time.
"I'll jump right in. Did you ever look at alternative suspects?" There's a subtle raise of my eyebrow.
"No." I nod slowly, turning to survey the jury.
"Why?"
"Because he had means and motive, there were red flags."
"Red flags? Do you usually build a case on red flags?" There's a light mocking tone to my voice.
"If they seem worth looking into as a suspect."
"Did you ever investigate Allie's life to find alternative suspects?"
"We did."
"Oh good. What did you find?"
"In regards to?" I frown and tilt my head.
"Oh sorry. Too broad. Did you check her text messages?"
"No. She had deleted a lot of them."
"You could have subpoenaed them. Or check the phone records to see what numbers she frequently contacted." I shrug helpfully.
"Your honor, is there a question there?" The prosecutor calls out behind me.
"Oh, sorry. Did you subpoenaed them? Or check the phone records?"
"We did check the phone records."
"Find any evidence of her being unfaithful?"
"Nothing substantiated."
"So you were aware of a possible affair?" There's a long pause, and I turn to give the jury a look.
"Might be a good time to mention Allie's best friend Rebecca Jamison has agreed to testify. So, were you aware?"
"Yes. We were."
"Of her affair with Will Halstead?"
"Yes."
"So you questioned Will?"
"Yes."
"About more than his brother Jay?"
"No."
"So you had another man – who fits those height and weight stats you already mentioned, if you recall- that had motive, and you didn't investigate it?" The smart tone of mine is impossible to miss.
"We didn't see-"
"Yes or No please Detective Harris."
"No."
"So when the original investigation was running, you only had a feeling about Jay Halstead guilt? You had no evidence, no forensics, there were multiple men in her life with possible motives, and you never looked at alternative suspects?" I blow out a breath dramatically, shaking my head in feign confusion.
"It's more complic-"
"Yes or no."
"No. We didn't."
"No further questions."
"Oh my god. Watching the detective squirm was heaven." Jen smirks over at me as she takes a sip of her drink.
"What about the prosecutions cross? I could actually see him sweating." I add with a laugh.
"Oh I needed this." I lean back on the couch hugging my drink.
"Well drink up, you deserve it." She reaches over and pours me another.
"Hopefully it will help knock me out. Could use at least a full six hours."
"You can always stay here if you want."
"Thanks but..."
"But you're hoping that Jay will come around." I shrug at her.
"I love him." My whisper is quiet and full of pain.
"I know. I also know he loves you too."
"Jen… I hate feeling this way."
"Oh Erin, I know." She reaches over and squeezes my hand.
"This is why I promised myself I wouldn't ever fall in love like this. Where I lose myself in a guy, that suddenly my happiness doesn't matter. Because when you love someone this much, it really hurts when you lose them." I gulp down my drink, wanting the feelings to disappear.
"I don't believe you have truly lost him."
"I knew I should have fought it, our feelings. Damn him for being so charming. I was perfectly happy believing it was better to not give your heart away, because then it can't break."
"What about that 'it's better to have loved and lost then to never love at all'?" Jen mocks with a shake of her head, her own jaded past shading her beliefs.
"Those people are idiots."
"Yep. They are asking for it." I can't help but laugh, before I wipe a tear.
"You really think it's not over for us?"
"I mean he just needs someone to smack some sense into him – which I'm happy to volunteer for that task." My laugh quickly turns into tears.
"Please don't start crying again." I laugh wiping them away.
"I'm so over crying."
"Come here." She opens out her left arm, bringing me into her side, she holds me on the couch as we finish another drink.
My whole body is exhausted when I enter my apartment, my drinks at Jen giving me momentary reprieve.
I drop my keys to the table in the hallway, looking up and pausing when I see the glow of my bedroom light across the living room floor.
My heart stops briefly, as I slowly walk towards the bedroom. I'm anxious as I call out Jay's name, while I round the corner.
My heart drops when I see Jay packing a bag.
"Moving the rest of your stuff into the spare room?" I lean against the doorframe, trying not to get baited into a fight, and give him his space.
"No, I'm leaving. We're done. In fact, you're fired." The callous way he says the words have me stunned speechless, allowing him to continue.
"It turns out I can't do this, have you as my lawyer, have you in my life… not after…" I hear his words but it takes longer to process them, eyes focused on the bag.
"You think this is easy for me?" I whisper, not knowing what to say, my mind fogged in exhaustion.
"No, so this is better for both of us."
"So that's it? No talking about it. We're just… done?" I stand up straight, shaking my head at him.
"We have talked."
"No, we've argued. We've screamed. We haven't talked, and we certainly have n't listened."
"It's not up for debate Erin." I scoff at him.
"And where do you think you'll go?"
"Mile's, Mouses'… anywhere but here." He shrugs preoccupying himself packing again.
"You can't."
"What, you think because I'm broke, you can control me?" His accusation blindsides me. I laugh mirthlessly at him.
"Jay, if I could control you we wouldn't be in this mess. Besides you can't leave because your bail is tied to you staying at this address." He stops packing, hands on hips as he sighs.
"So I'm sorry, you know where the spare room is if you really can't stand to share a bed with me. I mean your choices are either jail or here. And if you would choose jail to here, you have serious issues. And if you prefer jail to this then I don't even know what the hell I'm fighting for anymore." I rub my face moving further into the room, overwhelmed in my frustration.
"That's what I'm trying to tell you. Stop fighting."
"No." My word is harsher than I intend.
"I'll get a public defender."
"Do you really have total disregard for your life? For justice? For actually getting the killer?"
"Fine I'll try get a loan for a new attorney." It takes all my remaining strength to not say something I'll regret.
"No, you won't. Fine, I'll accept you're done with me personally, but I'd never let you get a public defender, I would pay for your new defence lawyer if that would work…because it hurts seeing you everyday." My whispered confession at the end falls on deaf ears.
"Why wouldn't it work?" It hurts that's the only part he's responding to.
"You think the judge wants to entrain a motion for change of council? Or that the jury won't read into the fact your female defence attorney left? That they won't think 'hmmm did she find out he's guilty and couldn't stand working with him anymore?' because they will think that. They'll think all kinds of things. So you're stuck with me." He's finally looking at me; I sigh in frustration when he doesn't say anything.
"You're stuck with seemingly the only person trying to free you – and certainly the only one interested in finding the killer."
"Don't accuse me of not caring." He snaps out at me.
"You care, but you're too blind to investigate and too close this, and you're just cutting me down every move I make. Telling me I'm doing it wrong. I'm not breaking any laws but the fact you continually make me feel like I'm some dirty lawyer who can't walk on the straight and narrow hurts. It's low of you jay. You know why I do what I do. What it means to me." My response is passionate, breathing heavy after my rant.
"Fine. I'll sleep in the spare room." He picks up his bag and makes his way to the door where he pauses.
"I am sorry Erin. I don't know how to get past my anger. I don't want you to think…" He trails off; I turn to find him crying silently.
"I don't want you to think I don't care about what happens. I am thankful that you've been fighting for me, but I just can't… I don't see a way through it for us."
He leaves, and when I hear the spare room door close my heart breaks, and the tears flow again.
"Damn it." I grunt in frustration, I walk over and pick up his shirt he must have dropped. I inhale the scent, both comforting me and feeling like a knife through the heart.
A/N: Here is some more angst for you... lol
Things are really wrapping up. Although with me, wrapping up could be 10 or more chapters hahhaha
Please review
take care :)