Bienvenidos a todos,

welcome (back?) everybody :)

The world is such a mess these days, and my heart bleeds whenever I watch the news, but I find a bit of peace in distraction, and maybe you do, too?

Because - not much of a surprise ahead - by staying at home, I've found the time to also translate a couple of those mentioned chapters that explore Caspian's past, from his tragic childhood and turbulent youth in Telmar to his coronation and first travels up to the events of this story's chapter 1. Hence the following 11 chapters can be understood as prequel and, for better orientation, will be marked with a P in the chapter title.

Trigger warning: In this chapter we'll get to know Caspian's parents, and the dark side of their marriage. What follows will include topics such as domestic violence and murder (well, thank you Miraz …).

That being said, please don't worry, these additional chapters are not only going to be dark and sad - it's also about friendship and young folks finding their way, love and joy and celebrating life to create a better future.

Alright, that's it for now. If you decide to keep on reading, I hope you have good time, and it'd honestly mean the world to me if you left a comment :)

Now let's raise the curtains and dive into the world of Narnia, beginning in Telmar…

Chapter 49/P1

No matter the Blood

"¡Cállate, no lo quiero oír!" (1)

Whenever his father's voice sounded that gruff, it gave Caspian chills.

He was staring at the dark wooden panelling of the high ceilings, and at the bare stone walls of the grey castle, but the sad sight could by no means distract him from his parents' quarrel in the royal chambers. He could not quite understand their words behind closed doors, but he did not have to - as young as he was, he could tell that his father was raging mad.

His Mamá, on the other hand, sounded desperate, frustrated for sure. She carried lots of love in her heart, and she gave it all to her son.

The King, however, was not a man of great emotion, except for annoyance with his Queen.

"Why won't you believe me just this once? You cannot trust him!" She kept repeating that to her husband in vain. "I know he's your brother and I know you don't want to believe any of it, but he's cold-blooded and hungry for power - I can see it in his eyes!"

"Stop it, Lykiana, just stop!" the King all but shouted. "I'm warning you, not another bad word about Miraz!"

"But don't you see how he's even looking at your son?" she asked in disbelief. "He's a thorn in his side - your son, the rightful heir to the throne!"

All of a sudden, Caspian could hear her moan, and he knew exactly that his father had grabbed her firmly so she was forced to look at him. He had done it before, even in Caspian's presence, it was a pattern repeated.

"Miraz simply doesn't approve of how you pamper the boy - and neither do I," the King hissed. "You seem to hate our ancestors, otherwise you wouldn't constantly try to teach him the exact opposite of our traditions and values!"

"Because he's to learn what's right and wrong?"

"Don't push me," he growled. "His upbringing will be identical to mine. So don't dare to secretly exempt him from exercises of my officers again! Did you believe they wouldn't tell me?"

"He's only five, Caspian, he's still a child, not a soldier! He's hardly as heavy as the bows they want him to shoot with! He can't march with grown men, let alone for hours, don't you see that? Even some of your Lords took pity on him!"

"Each and every beginning is hard," the King remained unimpressed. "But he's tougher than you think and what doesn't kill him makes him stronger. My son will be brought up like any other heir of this family, and someday he'll thank me for it."

"That's what you believe?" Lykiana snorted, then she suddenly whined in pain. "Caspian, you're hurting me!"

"¡Escúchame bien!" he said, "there's nothing to discuss. You do as I say, just like our son! And you will apologize to my brother, for your impudence tonight - whether you like it or not!" (2)

"By no means!" she protested, "he called me bruja gitana, in front of everyone, and I'm the one to apologize?" (3)

"You have accused him of unthinkable betrayal, of high treason, in front of everyone! He wouldn't hurt me - he's my brother, our son's uncle!"

"That's precisely what makes it so grotesque," she shouted. "Be angry with me, that's fine, but I tell you, if you don't see Miraz for what he really is, your son will soon grow up without his father!"

The next thing Caspian could hear was a dull blow, cutting to the bone, and his mother fell to the ground.

The door was swung open and when the King saw his son's face, his rage turned into consternation immediately. He sighed, bent down to the Prince and asked, "Did you hear us?"

Caspian could neither nod nor shake his head, he just looked at his father with big round eyes.

"Of course you did…" the King concluded and let out a harsh breath. He went on to stroke his son's dark hair, saying, "You're my flesh and blood, my pride and joy, and I will always be grateful to your mother for you, don't ever forget that. Take care of her, will you? I didn't mean to hurt her…"

Caspian gulped and nodded when his father rose again. He went out without looking back when his son hurried into the chambers next door to find his Mamá lying on the floor.

As gentle, little hands cupped her face, she regained consciousness.

"Mamá, despiértate" Caspian pleaded quietly. "You have to wake up, Mamá!" (4)

Not long ago he had realized that the bruises he occasionally noticed on her body were his father's doing. But the King had never gone that far before - at least that's what he believed.

"Cariño," she tried to put on a brave face and drew in a deep breath as she leaned onto the bed, somewhat dazed. "You shouldn't have witnessed that."

"He said he didn't mean to hurt you," Caspian repeated his father's words, clearly overwhelmed.

"And we'll believe him, cariño," she forced a smile and hugged him to her so he could not see her tears.

"What if it happens again?" Caspian asked the very question to which his Mamá knew no answer.

"He's the King, pequeñito," she sighed wearily, almost as though it was an excuse.

"He can't hurt you," Caspian shook his head and detached himself from her to take a look at her wrists. He could still tell where his father had held her.

"You're my sunshine, do you know that?" she said in an attempt to distract him, hastily hiding the King's traces under the embroidered sleeves of her dress. "Don't worry about me."

Too many loose strands of her updo fell in her face, so she removed the hairpin from her dark curls and put it on the chest of drawers next to them. Then she took Caspian by the shoulders and said, "You will one day be the hope of your people, and you'll see the faults of our ancestors - I know it. You're destined to do great things. You won't be like the Kings before you…"

"How do you know?" he asked anxiously.

She could not suppress a quiet laugh. "I'm your Mamá, I can feel it," she replied and hugged him tightly to her again. "Never doubt that, cariño."

On her way to the ballroom, each of her footsteps echoed on the stone floor of the castle. Only the bittersweet, orange dusk she could see from every window on the horizon reminded her of her quiet longing for happiness and love.

But the Queen strictly put aside all doubts about her life, for Caspian - the only good thing she ever had the King to thank for. For her son, she endured it all, and she had to focus. She had to stay clear-headed and wait for Miraz to finally make a mistake.

She could already imagine the triumphant smile on his face - to be forced to apologize to him would be worse than choking on her own tongue. Yet she would have to face this humiliation, even though she knew it was all wrong.

Why did nobody seem to notice how taunting and insidious the King's brother was? Why did no soul believe her when she claimed that he was up to no good? She had felt paranoid for weeks, constantly looking over her shoulder - and she could have sworn that someone was behind her. What was going on was a stitch-up, she was almost certain. Miraz came closer and closer, step by step, hiding in the shadows to this day. He was not a man to underestimate and yet his brother made that foolish mistake.

When she arrived in front of the ballroom she was hesitant to enter. She smoothed down her skirt one last time and tried to gather herself. She was so lost in thought that she winced when she suddenly felt a hand on her shoulder.

Had she really been followed?

Was she going crazy?

"I didn't mean to scare you," the King hurried to say, no less surprised by her unexpected reaction.

It took a moment for her heart beat to slow down again, but when it did, her stomach cramped at the mere sight of the King.

"¿Estás bien?" he asked quietly, obviously feeling guilty. "Did I hurt you?" (5)

She was too proud to admit the truth to the man who had inflicted pain on her for years - and for the life of her, she did not know what to say to him.

The King could clearly see the contempt on her face, even if she tried to hide it. "Lo siento mucho, querida," he tried to make up for it, though he knew deep down that he could never apologize enough for the mistakes he made. (6)

"Querida…" she was lethargic to repeat, "you couldn't raise your hand on me if you loved me."

"It won't happen again," he swore and took her hands into his. She let it happen, what choice did she have after all? "It's no excuse, but… I cannot tolerate you speaking like that when it comes to Miraz, you know that."

The King was unable to see the truth - the obvious displeasure at the fact that Miraz was the second born son. Caspian had defended and supported his younger brother all his life. The King was not a bad man, only what his family had formed him into. But still the Queen could not forgive him for his physical violence. If it had not been for her son, she would have fled her marriage long ago. But she could not live without her child and leaving with him was out of the question as well - everyone everywhere would recognize Telmar's Crown Prince.

"And I promise you I'll keep him in line as well - Miraz won't publicly insult you ever again, believe me," the King assured. "But in return, I expect you to do the same, querida."

She was hesitant at first, but she eventually nodded. "If I do, will you reconsider your decision regarding Caspian's participation in the military exercises? Please?"

He gave a half-smile and said, "He's lucky to have you as a mother. I'll give it another thought…"

"Lykiana," Miraz greeted her in mock euphoria, however he could not quite hide the darkness that surrounded him. "We were thinking along the same lines, mh? Fresh air under starlit skies…"

He joined her on the ballroom's spacious terrace and positioned himself next to the Queen. They had already exchanged hypocritical apologies as demanded, right at the beginning of the dinner in front of the curious eyes of the Telmarine nobility.

"What a brilliant display of your acting skills," he praised her and leaned over the railing of the terrace a little bit more to make himself comfortable.

"The same applies to you, Miraz," she shot back acidly. "No one could ever tell just how much you despise me after those flowery words of yours."

"Oh, I beg of you," he said, his eyes holding a glint of pleasure. "I don't despise you, my dear - that would never occur to me, as a part of your past."

She hated how bad she was at hiding her emotions, and especially at these words she could no longer bear to look at him and gazed into the stars instead.

"Oh, don't worry, our secret has been safe with me for years," he said and gave her a dirty smile.

He drew closer, much too close, and, lost in thought, he began to wrap one of her loose strands of hair around his finger.

"My brother had no idea about us. He was just fascinated by your pretty, angelic face," he thought out loud and bit his lips. "He didn't care about your heritage. He couldn't even imagine that we'd known each other for quite some time. But how could he have guessed that a decent man like me had travelled to the Calormene border? How could he have guessed how much we've enjoyed the silence of the night?"

She could not stand his warm breath on her skin any longer, so she pushed his hand away and hissed, "You didn't bother to stand by your love when it mattered, Miraz! Your rank has always been more important than anything else, so don't even mention the silence of the night!"

"I've sometimes regretted my decision," he gave a mirthless laugh and, for the first time that evening, she believed she could see sincerity shining through. "But that doesn't matter any more, there's no turning back."

"No," she agreed, "but it changed you a lot. It's almost haunting." (7)

"Haunting?" he sneered. "Interesting choice of words. Makes me think of ghosts… Do you sometimes hear or see them?"

Every word was laced with sarcasm, and by the way he said it, she knew the truth at last. She was not paranoid…

"Do my ghosts leave traces?" he smiled, his gaze piercing into her soul.

She had no doubt anymore, it was crystal clear to her what he was talking about.

The disorder in her chambers had, again and again, been hardly noticeable, and inexplicable at that. Things disappeared and reappeared in other rooms, as if by magic. The King did not notice any of it, unlike Lykiana. And it gave her chills to think about the underlying warning. Miraz shadows drew nearer, each day, incessantly.

"I hear and see a lot, Miraz," she returned as calmly as she could. "Even if no one else does."

"You know what?" he said with a distant look into the mountains. "Astuteness can have disastrous effects..."

"So you suggest I should be afraid now?" she asked, clearly disgusted by his words.

"Well, I hate to say it, but now and then, when I've had a drink or two, I sometimes open my mouth too wide - even in front of my brother. And, after all these years, wouldn't it be too bad if he learned about our past?"

"You would've told him long ago hadn't you feared his reaction just as much," she said, raising her chin. "You're well aware that you can't do me more harm than yourself. You know him, your brother surely is no saint, he's jealous and possessive, but he would forgive the mother of his only son rather than you. So I guess I should tell him myself - maybe it would make him see who his brother really is."

Miraz chuckled, his expression was almost an approving one. "You've always been clever, I'll give you that." He cracked his head to one side, then he lowered his face to her again. "But you're really bad at taking care of yourself. Your words are proof that I have to use other means to prevent you from pointing your pretty little finger at me again. I won't let you cause another scene like today, Lykiana. You can't just tell my brother to watch his back. I won't let you endanger everything I've worked for."

"You don't have one bit of decency left in you," she said under her breath.

"Decency leads to dead ends," he replied plainly. "That's why I need you to keep your mouth shut."

Lykiana's disgust gradually blossomed into angst. He knew that only the stars could hear him and that he had nothing to fear, even if he boldly threatened her and her beloved.

"Your words are sound and fury," she nevertheless frowned. "No honest man would ever think that way."

"Very true," Miraz leered. "You see me as I really am. Dishonest. But nobody believes you, my love. Nobody believes in ghost stories."

"Maybe," she admitted. "But since we both know that your minions are not really ghosts, there will be traces. Sooner or later."

"Sooner or later?" he asked and his cold look made her shiver. "Might be sooner than you think, my dear. Your mistrust is annoying and you've been playing with fire long enough for my taste."

"No temo fuego, Miraz," she put on a brave face though she felt trapped. (7)

And, oddly enough, something about that statement of hers caused a spark - he looked at her almost longingly all of a sudden. "I know that you're fearless," he nodded, "I've always adored you because of that. You're a force of nature."

She held his gaze proudly as he went on, "But so am I. And in the end, that only makes it more exciting."

She could tell just how serious he was, and only when he noticed it he hid behind a scornful smile again.

"I'd better accompany you back to the ballroom now, mh? We're surely missed already."

"I know the way back, don't bother," she replied, seemingly unimpressed, and turned her back on him.

Miraz watched her leave with peace of mind. He never wanted to hurt her. But she gave him no choice. He could see it in her eyes - she knew what he was capable of, and he could not ignore that.

"Mamá, are you awake?"

Caspian closed the door behind him quietly to approach her bed.

She was not sleeping, she could not sleep a wink. Miraz's words and his true colors scared her, more than she liked to admit, and the worst part was that her hands were completely tied.

"You're obviously not asleep like you're supposed to, cariño," she tried to sound lightly and lifted him up so he could sit next to her on the bed. Knowing that her son was with her immediately made everything easier, and she held him tightly in her arms as if he was her anchor.

"Is Papá with friends again?" Caspian asked, still too little to be aware of the meaning of those words. And the Queen only nodded. She did not want Caspian to be forced to speak of his father's mistresses at such a young age, and so she was at least comforted by the euphemistic terminology they used.

"Yes, he is," Lykiana said and forced a smile. "He won't come back anytime soon. But thanks to you I'm not even alone anymore. What is it, cariño? Why can't you sleep?"

"No quiero dormir," Caspian said and snuggled closer to her, almost as though he was afraid of something. "Acabo de leer una leyenda..." (8)

"You can't sleep because of a Leyenda?" she could not suppress a quiet laugh. "Oh, cariño, those are just scary stories people tell for fun, nothing more. What scares you?"

"Santa Compaña," Caspian admitted, and Lykiana stopped laughing at once.

"Who told you about that story?" she asked hastily but Caspian only gave a half-shrug.

"There was a parchment underneath my door..."

The stories held that Santa Compaña, in the form of ghostly apparitions, announced the imminent death. So whoever had shared this Leyenda with the Prince either had a macabre sense of humor - or consciously conveyed a grotesque message.

The Queen could feel panic rise within her, and fear crawl up. But it was not ghosts or Santa Compaña who threatened her son, it was flesh and blood.

Miraz.

"Did you see who put it there, or did you hear anything?" Lykiana wanted to know.

"No," Caspian said anxiously. "Maybe a ghost?"

"No, cariño," she shook her head firmly. "There are no ghosts. That's just superstition, do you hear me? Don't be afraid of Leyendas or ghosts! Beware of people, even if you think you can trust them..."

"So nobody dies tonight?" Caspian's eyes widened, and it almost broke Lykiana's heart. She shook her head and held him in her arms.

"No, over my dead body," she mumbled, inwardly cursing the King for his absence, his ignorance and his frivolous trust in a man without a conscience.

She closed her eyes to gather herself for a moment, but then she suddenly startled because of something sharp that stung into her back.

Caspian looked up at her and wanted to know what happened, but she did not answer immediately.

She reached for her back and a moment later she held the very hairpin in her hand that she had placed on the chest of drawers in the late afternoon. She was staring at it, knowing well it was further proof of all her suspicions - and yet a hairpin would never make anyone believe her. If she was to speak up, everybody would assume she had just thoughtlessly misplaced the needle. But in her bed? Another clear warning left her helpless.

She was bleeding a bit, but that was not important now. Miraz had threatened her son and no matter the consequences, she had to finally act.

"Come, come, we'll have to look for Papá," she told Caspian and got up.

But out of nowhere her mouth felt terribly dry.

Was it the fear, almost paralyzing her?

For a moment there she believed she should drink a sip of water, but in her mistrust she suspected it might be poisoned.

"Why do we look for him?" Caspian asked as he stood up as well.

"We must speak to him, cariño," Lykiana said, but she had to briefly lean against the cold stone wall of her chambers. Her legs got heavy and she could hardly breathe. Unexpected fatigue was making her whole body stand still.

"Mamá? What's wrong?"

It was nothing but intuition, yet she let her gaze wander back to the hairpin - and scales fell from her eyes immediately.

Miraz did not want her son.

Not yet at least, he wanted her.

Neither did he have to poison her water. He only needed to wet an inconspicuous needle in poison and place it in her bed.

Who would ever suspect anything once she could no longer tell the tale?

"Caspian, listen, I need you to hurry. Wake my maid up, she must accompany you - find your father," Lykiana said under her breath and let herself sink to the ground along the wall. Her legs could no longer hold her up as her heartbeat shot the poison through her veins with every pump.

"Mamá?" Caspian tried to help her up in vain. "Mamá, what is it?"

"You have to do what I just said." She tried her best to stay calm. "Do you understand? Don't you go alone!"

Her son's black eyes swam with tears, but she put her index finger on his lips and smiled tiredly. "Everything's going to be alright, cariño, but you have to hurry up."

And that he did.

Caspian had found his father, in the east wing of the castle, with two women in his arms, and he had hastily told the King to follow him.

But they were too late. And the Prince could not explain what had happened, he knew nothing of poison or Miraz's betrayal at that.

But Lykiana's time was up and, for the first time in his life, Caspian's heart was broken.

Translations:

1. Cállate, no lo quiero oír / Stop talKing, I don't want to hear that!

2. Escúchame bien / Listen up

3. Bruja gitana / Gypsy witch

4. Despiértate / Get up

5. ¿Estás bien? / Are you alright?

6. Lo siento mucho, querida / I'm very sorry, love

7. No temo fuego / I'm not afraid of fire

8. No quiero dormir, acabo de leer una leyenda / I don't want to sleep, I've just read a folk tale / scary story