Chapter 43

Justice and Jesse made it to our new home safe and sound. They were finally healthy enough and weighed enough to leave the hospital. I admire the medical staff for all that they did. They are more heroic than I'll ever be. Justice weighed 1 pound and 2 ounces when he was born; while Jesse weighed 2 pounds 4 ounces. They could've died. I also can't thank the hospital enough for taking care of Hope. Grampa was right about things turning out alright in the end.

It was challenging at first. I forgot what it was like to have a new baby in the house. Although now we had two babies.

Harmione was everything you could ever want in an older sister. She looked after the boys in the afternoons after she got finished with her school work. She did her best to keep them calm. She helped Hope feed and diaper them too. She wanted to be apart of everything we did with the twins.

Justice and Jesse were still very small, and it was hard to figure out who they favored most in the family. I see a lot of Hope in Jesse. He has her same signature magenta eyes. Just like Harmione. Justice's eyes are definitely mine. Emerald green. They came home with monitors and cables to wire them to. It was to check their heart rate. But more importantly it was for safety. If the monitor went off; they may have stopped breathing. A simple pat on the foot would help them to breathe again.

We were told my a nurse that premature babies tend to do that as their lungs are under developed. The hospital was gracious enough to let us keep the monitors until the boys grew up a bit.

One evening, the family came over to have dinner with us and to see the boys. During dinner we heard one of the monitors alarms go of. My mother and father sprang from the table and ran to the baby room. Gwen and Kevin, along with my Aunt and Uncle did they same.

Hope and I stayed very still and very quiet. Harmione even stayed seated eating her dinner next to Genesis. We knew the sound. I discovered late one night that the monitor makes two sounds. One sound means the baby has stopped breathing. The other means that the baby has pulled the wires out. Pulling the wires out doesn't hurt the baby, but Jesse did discover it gets him attention.

I told Hope and Harmione about it. It's a slight change in pitch when the alarm sounds but we heard it so much that we could tell the difference. My family was astonished, my mother disgusted and frantic with worry; that we didn't just jump up from the table like they did.

"What was Jesse doing when you went in there?"

"That little jerk was smiling at us." Kevin answered before Mom got they chance.

"He does that." Hope explained and sipped her drink. I wiped my mouth off on a napkin and put it back in my lap.

"It could have been serious though Ben!" My Uncle Frank added.

"It's alright...we know Jesse's okay."

Harmione nodded.

"He does that." She said.

"How can you live with him doing that, that would scare me to death!" My mom shouted.

"Mom...it's okay Hope and I can hear the difference...you can't."

Everyone finally settled down and we finished our meal. One thing about babies is that they sleep more than a normal person. If they aren't sleeping though it's hard to put them to sleep. It seems like they can go for hours without it; as long as they have a fresh diaper and a bottle. Hope and I decided to do a tag team and take turns at night with the kids.

It was 1:00am when Justice started up. He began to cry loudly in his little monitor bed. I rolled over on my side and adjusted the pillow.

"Hope...it's your turn.

Hope groaned and got out of bed. She tended to Justice's needs who was not only wet; but muddy. She crawled back in bed next to me and pressed her back up against mine. At 2:00am Jesse began to cry. He had a cry like a motorboat. He wailed loudly from the bedroom.

"Ben...Ben..." I heard Hope whisper.

She nudged my shoulder.

"Ben..."

"Okay..." I breathed tiredly. I tended to Jesse; he either felt lonely or had a nightmare. I soothed him back to sleep. For the next 2 to 3 hours it was on and off again between the two of us. Sometimes they didn't cry it was just us getting up to check on them. Around 5:30am, I got up to use the restroom. As I stood over the toilet with one hand on the wall infront of me. I heard one of the boys cry as I started to urinate. I sighed.

"Hope!" I shouted.

The cry lasted for a few minutes then finally ceased. I did my business as quick as possible and entered the baby room.

"Thanks Hope..sorry I had to go and I-" I paused.

There in the rocking chair sat Harmione rocking little Justice. I kneeled down in front of her.

"Harmione...sweetheart what are you doing up?"

"He needed me Daddy."

I smiled.

"You're a good big sister you know that?"

She only nodded.

"They are gonna love you when they get a little bigger...all the games you'll play...and talks you'll have...it'll be a lot of fun."

Harmione smiled and stroked his little bald head.

"Why don't you go on back to bed...I'll take care of him."

"It's okay...I'm not sleepy..."

"Okay...you can stay in here as long as you want...just don't let them keep from getting ready for school, here in another hour."

"Yes sir."

Harmione lived and breathed for her brothers soon after. She began to tell them about her days at school before she even told me and Hope. She'd bring Deanna over to show off her brothers. She began reading to them late at night. Often I'd find her asleep in the floor by their cribs.

One night as Harmione slept close to the cribs I gently picked her up and put her to bed. When I got up the next morning she was back in the floor again. A few months later Hope and I started to see a change in Harmione. She wasn't eating or sleeping right. We got a note from the school that said Harmione had fallen asleep in class and had missed a few assignments.

We brought Mom over to look after the babies so we could have a good uninterrupted chat with Harmione. I picked her from school like normal and said nothing on the way home. I acted as if I didn't know anything. We entered the house and Harmione put her backpack and her lunch box on the dinning room table. Hope entered the room.

"Harmione...do you think you could sit down for a minute...your Daddy and I want to talk to you."

Harmione did as she was instructed. I entered and placed my car keys in my pocket. Hope and I took a seat in front of Harmione.

"Okay..." Hope began. She slid Harmione's pink and purple unicorn lunchbox toward herself and unzipped it. She pulled out a half eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich. The rest of Harmione's lunch, a bag of chips, Apple slices, and a brownie untouched. Only an empty juice pouch seemed to have been engulfed by Harmione at lunch.

"Har...do you not like the lunches I make for you?" Hope asked. "I can make you something else if you just tell me."

"No...I love your lunches Momma."

"Then why haven't you been eating them?"

"I wasn't hungry today."

"What about yesterday, or the day before that...you didn't eat your lunch on those days either." Hope continued.

"I just wasn't hungry Momma."

Hope looked at me, I looked at Harmione.

"Are you sick honey?" Hope questioned.

"No."

"What about sleeping in class...you've never done that before." I interrupted. "What's going on Har?"

"I'm just sleepy."

"Harmione Kay...you know you can tell us anything."

Harmione looked away and I noticed she was about to cry.

"Har...we aren't trying to lecture you...you're not in trouble; your Mommy and I are just worried."

"I...I don't want you to worry about me..." Harmione mumbled. "But..."

"But..."

Harmione began to cry softly to herself. Hope and I looked at one another.

"Harmione what is it sweetheart?" Hope asked and stood up. She walked over to Harmione and hugged her, squeezing her tightly.

"I don't want my brother's to feel left out of you only take care of me." Harmione sobbed.

It was actually pretty rare to see Harmione cry like that. She was very strong willed. I thought perhaps she was feeling left out because our attention was on the boys, but Harmione didn't see it that way.

"I...I want to be strong enough to take care of them too...and take care of you and Daddy."

"Baby girl...that is so sweet but that's not your job...oh honey."

Hope picked up Harmione. Harmione held tight to Hope's neck. Before Hope stood all the way up she grunted and placed Harmione back down.

"Babe?"

She held her waist and touched her stomach.

"Hope... you alright?"

"Yeah...its just...a little sore."

Hope sat back down at the table. I picked up Harmione instead. I pulled Harmione's hair behind her ear. One of her blue sapphire earring gleamed at me.

"I told you, your Momma and I would take care of everything...that's such a huge burden to carry baby...besides you do enough for your brothers...and that helps us a lot... We can't thank you enough for that."

"You've been a big little helper sweetie." Hope told her.

"Don't worry about that stuff..."

"And..." Harmione sniffled. "And I want you to be proud of me..."

"We will always be proud of you Princess." I replied and wiped her tears away. Hope stood up. We then did something we hadn't in a while that we knew Harmione loved. We both shouted:

"Harmione sandwich!"

I kissed one cheek while Hope kissed the other. Harmione smiled brightly.

"You are our first baby...you will always come first...and we will always take care of you and your brothers...so you don't have too."

Harmione nodded.

"Okay." I pecked the side of her head and put her down. "Now...how about we go out for cheeseburgers...and French fries...and then some ice cream...just us."

"And Mommy?!"

"I'll come too."

"And your Nana will stay here to look after the boys...you know they'll be safe with her."

"Yeah!" Harmione shouted.

"Okay go tell her and let's go get some food!"

"Okay!" Harmione shouted louder and ran to the baby room. "Nana, Nana!"

I looked at Hope and smiled. She smiled back. Harmione always had a good head on her shoulders. I'll never understand how someone so small can take so many hits and not even feel the punches. How she could be so brave, and stand so tall even when she had every right to cry. How could she just stand there and not so much as flinch when things got scary. How can someone so beautiful come from someone as ugly as me? She was like her mother in so many ways. They both have these eyes that can catch any soul on fire. The are perfectly imperfect. They are strong willed.

Passionate. Creative. and True Blue. They are loyal and humble and mature and loving, charming, witty, graceful, humorous, and intellectually gifted. They are astute and proper and classy and unforgettable. They are timeless and wonderful. Harmione has grown so much tremendously. She have come so far in life. She is this magnificent view of radiant light that blinds negativity away. She truly deserves every ounce of credit for making things run easier in our family. Harmione is truly amazing and I know her brothers will be just the same.