Chapter 30: I'm Right Here
Derek's Point-of-View
"The boys are asleep." Delilah sighed as she sat in the chair next to mine, stretching her legs out towards the fire "Dani just dozed off."
"Thanks for helping." I smiled "How are you feeling?"
"I thought you didn't care." She sighed.
"Of course I care." I frowned "You're my daughter, I love you, of course I care. I just…" I let out a relentful sigh "You have to figure out that sometimes you've just got to do something whether you like it or not, because it's for the greater good. That's what being a parent is all about."
She nodded.
"I'm sorry you're not feeling well, if I could snap my fingers and change that I would."
"I think you're doing just fine Dad." She yawned "I think we really might make it out of this."
"You think so?"
"Yeah, I do."
"You should probably go get some rest, you need it more than any of us do."
She smiled and nodded, then leaned in and gave me a hug before retreating to the tent.
"You know I'm really not accustomed to peeing in the woods." I heard next to me, I looked up to see Meredith sitting down in the chair Delilah had just left "but aside from the having to squat in a bush I pray wasn't poison oak, it's not all that bad."
"I'm sorry." I sighed "I forgot that you girls can't pee wherever you want, just whip it out and go."
"No," she rolled her eyes "it's not that easy for us."
"I don't think I'll ever fully understand you women." I sighed "But I guess that's the curse of man."
"You're doing just fine."
"I don't think I am." I said rubbing my eyes.
"You're doing a better job than you think."
"I just wish it wasn't so late." I groaned "I wish that I'd paid more attention years ago, that I'd never…I just screwed up so much."
"It's never too late."
"Maybe not for the kids." I sighed "But I miss my wife."
I heard a moment of silence before her strangled voice rang out "I'm right here Derek."
The tone of her voice caught me off guard, I whirled my head around just in time to see her straining to focus and slowly look at me.
"Meredith?"
"Derek." She choked out as she looked dumbfounded and lost "What happened, where am I?"
I fell onto my knees in front of her and cupped my hand in her face in my hands as instinct. She was having a lucid moment, a completely lucid moment, and I knew that it wasn't something that happened often, or maybe never again, it was a gift.
"Meredith." I breathed into her, her eyes focused on me.
"What happened…where am I?" she asked frantically "Why am I not at Ridgecrest?"
"We took a trip, we just took a little trip together to get some fresh air."
She nodded in recognition and then let out a soft breath "I miss you."
My heart jumped with joy as a smile spread across my face "I miss you too baby."
I leaned in on instinct to kiss her, my lips softly touched hers and I felt her gasp and kiss back for a second before she ripped herself from my hands and reared backwards, I looked at her with alarm as she stared back at me with a blank stare yet angry shock laid in her eyes… I knew she was gone again.
"Who the hell do you think you are!" she gasped "Kissing me like that.. I don't even know you!"
"I…I'm sorry." I whispered, "I'm so sorry."
"It's fine." She waved me off "Just don't let it happen again."
I nodded as she stood up and walked to the tent.
The next morning I woke up in the exact same spot I'd dozed off in the night before. The sun came over the tree line and lit up the camp, causing my eyes to cringe in pain and I groaned as I sat up and stretched out my cramped muscles. I stood up out of the chair just as Winston came barreling out of the tent.
"Dad! Dad!" He cried out as he ran to me.
"What is it?" I asked with alarm "Where's the fire?"
"Can we go fishing?" he asked with all the excitement in the world "Just you and me?"
I couldn't remember the last time I'd seen him so happy over a fishing trip before, I smiled.
"Yes, you can but we need to take your brother. We'll make it a guy's fishing trip."
"Ok." He smiled "I'll go wake him up."
He went and crawled back into the tent just as Meredith was coming out, she yawned as she stepped out in jeans and a flannel button up shirt, her hair still in a roll out of bed mess but she could still do beauty in her sleep.
"Morning." She said "Did you make the coffee yet?"
"No." I frowned "I just got up."
"Some boy scout leader you are." She scoffed, and looks like it was going to be another one of those days.
"I can start it quickly before I take them fishing."
"No." she waved me off "I make better coffee than you anyway."
It was true… she told me that often in the past. Unless it was strong enough to put hair on a man's chest it wasn't good coffee to her, the woman had a stomach of steel.
"Dad." Winston groaned "Tell him he has to change."
I looked over just as Ian came out of the dress wearing a pair of jeans, under one of Dani's purple polka-dot dresses, a pair of white satin play gloves and a net hat that came down and barely covered his eyes.
"Ian." I sighed "As lovely as that outfit is…I think you need to change, we're going fishing, not to Sunday morning church."
"But Dad!" he whined.
"Son, this really has to stop I—"
"Oh let him wear the damn dress!" I heard hissed over by the fire.
"Excuse me?" I frowned at Meredith.
"So what if he wears a dress, what's wrong with it anyway?"
"He's a boy!" I argued.
"It's probably just a phase, let it phase in and then phase out." She lectured.
"And what if it's not a phase?" I gulped.
"Then he is going to need a parent who is going to support him no matter what." She scolded "Kids are killing themselves these days because they are too afraid of telling their family who they really are in fear of being rejected. So, what's more important Derek, burying your son, or living with the fact that he enjoys wearing girl clothes?"
I rubbed my cheek in thought as if she'd just slapped me with the truth. I painfully cringed at the images of my little soft-hearted Ian hanging from a noose or someone having to pry a gun from the fingers of his cold dead hand. I shuddered and then turned back around to face my boys.
"You know what." I sighed "You look fantastic. So, let's just go fishing... hell, maybe you'll just attract the fish to jump onto shore."
So, my son likes wearing dresses…there are worse things in life, right?
I love Meredith. What are your thoughts?