Chapter 50: Celestial Melody
She flinched as a spike of panic cut through her mind, scattering her thoughts. It was followed by pain, resolve...then fear. A terribly cold dread and a frigid terror coursed through her system. Where was it coming from?
'Where is she? I can't...I can't lose her...not now. I only just found her...my precious celestial goddess.'
Killian! It was Killian! All these emotions that she was feeling, they were coming from him. She had been able to somewhat sense his emotions before they had slept together, but now...clear as day but why? Why was he feeling this way? Was it because of her...but didn't he choose revenge over her?
'Was she taken? I left her...I left her all alone...without any kind of protection. Damn that blasted witch! I never should have left her! My Star...she's gone.'
The crimson haired woman cried out in pain, her heart screaming in anguish. Killian...he cared...he cared for her. He didn't leave her because of his need for revenge. He left because he was trying to protect her! Oh she was so stupid!
She had forgotten about a certain part of this episode where Killian had met up with Kora after she had gathered the ashes of the wardrobe and before the encampment was attacked. What if he hadn't shown up at this designated meeting? Would the Queen of Hearts have come looking for him… finding him with her? Oh Killian...he left so that she wouldn't find out about them, about her.
She could feel his mind going numb, his heart in utter chaos...so much pain but she didn't know where he was. How was she supposed to find him? She heard a clank and looked down, the flute she had been holding had slipped from her grasp and had collided with her Tardis pendant.
'Music is the easiest way to use your magic right now.'
'To give back what you entrusted to me… your inner light'
Inner Light...clever, very clever, Captain, but that left her with a problem. She didn't know how to play the flute. She picked up the small metal instrument, remembering what she had seen before falling asleep. Killian had been playing that song with this flute. The only way he could have known it was if she had taught it to him… and this flute, it was almost identical to the one Captain Picard had during the episode, The Inner Light.
She felt Killian's heart ripping itself apart. There wasn't a choice. She had to try...for him...for her Captain...for her God of the Sea. She placed her lips over the top of the flute, her fingers automatically slipping into position, and she started to play. She had thought that it would have sounded terrible, given that she had never been able to play the flute worth a damn back in Storybrooke, but it sounded just right.
The wind blew through the trees, making her shiver...damn, it got cold at night and didn't help that the Fourth Captain had made her core body temperature drop so she was shaking pretty badly. She stopped playing when her fingers started cramping up. She rubbed them on her pants, trying to generate heat from the friction.
She returned to playing and tried her best to ignore how the biting wind was making her feel like a meat popsicle. She swore under her breath in Old High Gallifreyan, her fingers hurting from the cold. She blew on them, rubbed them together, and returned to playing.
She could feel him...he heard it. Killian had heard the flute, but every time she stopped playing, he became terrified. She had to keep going and started playing again, only to wince when she felt his pain. Idiot must have fallen from not paying attention to his surroundings.
Her fingers locked up again and she had to stop playing so she could warm up her hands, but this time was different...relief. Her Captain was feeling relief, a very powerful surge of relief at that. He had found her but she wanted to finish the song, wanting him to remember what she had earlier and so she played...and ouch.
She knew that feeling...like she had touched something she wasn't supposed to but she realized that it was Killian that felt that way and the more he tried to hold on to whatever it was that had caused the pain...holy shit, he blanked. Artz had experienced this phenomenon before back before she had been prescribed ADHD medication.
She experienced two types; the overload and the blanking. When she overloaded, her thoughts kept crashing into themselves, moving so quickly that she couldn't think or speak and she did not feel safe when she couldn't think. Thinking kept her alive and gave her the ability to get out of the worst situations.
Blanking was pretty much the opposite. All thoughts would cease inside her head. The only problem was that she was actually aware of that fact. All her senses still worked, registering input, but when she came back online, she was utterly confused, not knowing what she was saying or doing...having completely forgotten.