Huzzah for 200! You guys are amazing. Thanks to demigod ravenclaw for being my 200th!
Ivy (Ch 25): Well... true.
demigod ravenclaw (Ch 2): Thank you!
demigod ravenclaw (Ch 5): Lol, thank you so much! I'll give you a shoutout.
demigod ravenclaw: Lol. You're not wrong...
Guest: I guess?
Ivy (Ch 2): ME TOO THOUGH.
Ivy (Ch 22): Lol.
Ivy (Ch 16): Google translate! Hebrew, I think.
Ivy (Ch 8): Lol, people always ask me, since I'm usually the only one with a watch. But that works!
Ivy (Ch 5): XD.
Guest (Ch 17): (Are you Ivy?) And mine too, lol.
Ivy (Ch 26): Oh. Maybe you should get an account! *Confetti cannon* No? Okay. Lams fangirls are everywhere. And definitely, lol. Thanks so much for all of the reviews!
MidnightBunnyy: I think most of them are online!
Abubble124: :P Thanks!
Cabeswater's Assassin: Me too!
Nekokenna: Definitely! Mine too. Thank you! I don't like Jamilton much either, but LAMS IS LIFE.
Okay, so, anyway, if you read my React to Ships book, as I feel like many of you do, you may have seen my Les Mis parody? I think a lot of you theater nerds (compliment!) are also into the wonder called "Les Miserables," if not go watch/listen to it, so you'd probably enjoy that! You don't need to be in the KOTLC fandom for that song- it's just about being a fangirl (or fanboy, or fanpotato) in general. "Captain of the Ship," to the tune of "Master of the House."
Okay, now that that's out of the way, I've written a parody to "I am not throwing away my shot" about the coronavirus pandemic and quarantine! So, yay! That's the chapter. Read it!
I am not gonna leave my house,
I am not gonna leave my house,
Hey yo, I'll buy some Purell
With sanitation I'll excel
And I am not gonna leave my house!
I'ma use Zoom to attend my meetings.
I shall use a computer to assist with all proceedings.
The problem is I'm getting bored with these same walls and this ceiling.
I gotta wear a face mask to leave
Calmness I can't achieve, how is everyone dealing?
Everyone stocking up on face masks, the toilet paper hoarders.
Tryin' to shop online, my technological skill, nonexistent.
Every single day I get boreder and boreder.
Dealing with my inmates, my temper's getting shorter.
Every day I am staying inside,
From COVID I will hide, hate the place I reside,
But so many have died.
The plan is to slow the spread of COVID,
But man, it's getting dark, so let me spell what we did.
We stayed in Q-U-A-R-A-N-T-I-N-E, can't ever leave!
All we can do is just socially distance
Meanwhile corona remains to be persistent.
Essentially, numbers go up relentlessly
Then Trump goes and tweets with intelligence nonexistent.
All of the public places are suddenly empty,
There's currently a pandemic in 2020
Wash your hands! (As says the CDC)
Don't be shocked when your life is in quarantine.
I will die of boredom while everything is deep-cleaned.
Eventually, Netflix will be my routine!
I am not gonna leave my house,
I am not gonna leave my house,
Hey yo, I'll buy some Purell
With sanitation I'll excel
And I am not gonna leave my house!
I am not gonna leave my house,
I am not gonna leave my house,
Hey yo, I'll buy some Purell
With sanitation I'll excel
And I am not gonna leave my house!
(It's time to stay inside!)
I dream of life without a quarantine.
We want to stay safe but there is no vaccine.
Well, I guess I'll see all my friends though a screen.
This sucks why can't we go back to 2019?
(Stay inside!)
Yo, I'm bored out of my mind,
Sleeping and watching Netflix 'cause in here I'm confined
I'm gonna stay home because I know it's my chance,
To socially distance, so COVID doesn't advance,
I'm gonna stay inside!
But we'll never be truly free
Until those with the virus are quarantined like you and me.
You and I, do or die. Wait till I sit around
While I'm bound at home while relatives surround,
I'm gonna stay inside!
Everyone, don't leave the house,
If you do wear a face mask even if you have doubts.
No one's with you, as the CDC bid,
Social interactions we've got to get rid
(Of) If you leave, you're gonna get COVID!
Guys, check what we got
So many cases, numbers not starting to drop,
Won't go away when it's hot,
Wash your hands quite a lot,
Let's get some toilet paper along with everything else we've bought,
What are the odds that we wouldn't be allowed in one spot
Everyone must socially distance, like it or not
A bunch of extroverts stuck in their houses all day,
Bored out of their minds an overwhelming feeling of dismay!
Oh, am I standin' too close?
Sometimes I get very lonely, stand closer than six feet,
I never had a pandemic before
I promise you will not get sore throats!
How about we stay away from all crowds!
I am not gonna leave my house,
I am not gonna leave my house,
Hey yo, I'll buy some Purell
With sanitation I'll excel
And I am not gonna leave my house!
I am not gonna leave my house,
I am not gonna leave my house,
Hey yo, I'll buy some Purell
With sanitation I'll excel
And I am not gonna leave my house!
Everybody stay
In, in, si-i-ide!
Stay in si-ide,
Stay in si-ide,
Don't let 'em infect ya!
(Yeah.)
Let's stay
(In, in, si-i-ide) I said don't leave the house, please.
(In si-ide) don't leave the house please.
(In si-ide) stay home,
Stay home, yeah.
COVID,
If you don't quarantine you get COVID,
Wash your hands so you don't get COVID,
Toilet paper won't stop the spread of COVID,
When will this quarantine stop COVID,
When will this quarantine stop COVID,
When will this quarantine stop COVID,
When will this quarantine stop COVID.
COVID.
I imagine corona so much it feels more like a memory
When's it gonna get me?
In the stores, six feet ahead of me?
If I wear a face mask, does it work, is health guaranteed?
Or maybe would it be smart to flee?
See, I never thought this'd happen in 2020,
If we were safe the numbers would be half as many.
Ask anybody why we stay at home and we groan, wait 'til it's overblown,
We have to make this pandemic stop, that's plenty
Scratch that this is not a pandemic, it's the apocalypse
Where we all stayed inside and ate chips!
CDC tells us we should listen to their tips,
We do not travel, don't go on any cruise ships.
And? If we survive coronavirus?
Is that a guarantee next time it won't surprise us?
Or will the stupidity we had begin an endless
Cycle of incompetence and leaders with lots of bias?
I know the numbers goin' up is displeasing,
But man, between all the coughing and sneezing,
I've been sleeping and eating,
We need to handle our pandemic situation
Didn't take action soon enough! What is wrong with our nation?
Bored with this existence, waiting for when we can cease to social distance,
Thanking doctors for their assistance!
I'm bored in the face of casualties and sorrow
For the first time, I want work tomorrow!
I am not gonna leave my house,
I am not gonna leave my house,
Hey yo, I'll buy some Purell
With sanitation I'll excel
And I am not gonna leave my house!
We're gonna stay home (It's corona time!)
We're gonna stay home (It's corona time!)
We're gonna, stay home, stay home.
It's corona time!
Stay home, stay home, it's corona time,
Stay home, it's corona time,
Stay home, wash your hands, your hands,
Yo it's corona time, it's corona time!
And I am not gonna leave my
Not gonna leave my house!
Okay, seriously, I hope you enjoyed that, because it took me forever to write. Like seriously, a lot of effort went into this, not just my usual googling memes and quitting. Quarantine sucks, as does the pandemic in general- I hope you guys are all staying safe, make sure you're washing your hands, try not to leave the house, six feet away, etc.- but maybe this song made you smile/laugh amidst all the panic general unhappiness brought by the virus?
Phew, I can stop being serious now! That was hard. Again, I hope you enjoyed- please review! :)
(Stay safe!)