Hi there,

here we go again! In this chapter: Caspian's last conversation with his father aaaand a little time jump to early teenage years ;)

Have fun, and I'd love to hear your thoughts ^-^

Chapter 50/P2

Walls

What happened afterwards felt like a confusing dream to Caspian. The concept of death was hardly comprehensible for a child, and yet it took weeks and many tears until he fully accepted that his Mamá would never come back. Without her, the dark castle walls seemed yet a little grayer, the suspicious looks of the nobility a little more oppressive.

Lykiana had often called Caspian her sunshine, but now that she was gone, his sun had disappeared from Telmar as well. Every fond memory of her hurt him, yet he was scared of forgetting.

The Queen had loved the meadows between the woods and the castle at the foot of the capital - something about the bright green gave her a vague sense of freedom - but her favorite place had, over the years, also become the setting for the Telmarine military's exercises she so loathed.

And although Caspian's father had exempted him from those in the meantime, on that day, the Prince got forced to join high-ranking officers on the field right right before dawn. They would begin at the first ray of light, and the mere thought of it made Caspian nervous.

"You just assume that's what she wanted," he suddenly heard his uncle say in a gruff voice, very close by. Caspian turned around to watch him and his father approach.

"No, I know it for a fact," the King frowned. "It was virtually her last wish, and I will not allow you or anybody else to ignore it."

"I was just trying to help," Miraz snorted. "Your officers wondered why the boy didn't take part in the exercises anymore."

"So you just ordered them to take him back here?" the King asked impatiently as they reached Caspian.

The Prince looked up at them, visibly uncomfortable, and Miraz sneered, "You're a tough little lad, you don't mind a bit of wrestling and marching, do you?"

The question was outright ridiculous in the light of the fact that he was facing a five-year-old that was once again to be put through the officers' program, among boys that were at least twice his age. Most Telmarine youths did not begin their training before the age of twelve, but it was the intention to form Caspian, as a member of the royal family, as early as possible.

His father had never been against it, but the death of his Queen had made him reevaluate his priorities, and it opened his eyes to the mistakes of his past. He had to realize there were plenty of sins to regret and so the change in his nature over the last weeks was quite noticeable. He had taken more time than ever for his son and even encouraged Caspian to talk about his mother, just so he might process her death a little bit better. The King had never been so close to him, and, for the first time, he also saw the need to protect him as his mother had always intended.

"Come on, pequeñito, vamos," the King held out his hand to Caspian before he could even answer his uncle. "No hace falta que te justifiques." (1)

"What are you teaching the boy?" Miraz hissed. "I'm his uncle!"

"And I am his father, and your King," Caspian regarded him intently. "You are not to question my decisions, I expect you to abide by my rules."

Miraz clenched his jaw, never had he expected bis brother to speak so bluntly. It was probably the fateful moment he decided to murder the King as well.

But Caspian suspected nothing, too soon he turned his back on him - just like his deceased wife.

Nevertheless he took his son's hand so they could make their way back to the castle. No horses, no carriages - Caspian wanted to take a walk and spend a few moments alone with his son.

And so they wandered the empty streets of the city before sunrise, and hardly anybody else was up so early. Not least because of that the King took heart to speak his mind.

"Do you miss her?"

His son looked up at him and nodded. "¿Y tú?" (2)

"Yes, very much, often times we don't cherish our blessings until it's too late," the King sighed. He hesitated for a couple of breaths before he went on. "Will you remember to do something for me?"

"What?" The Prince stopped walking.

"It will surely be a long, long time", the King smiled and bent down to his son, "but once you have children of your own - will you name your daughter after your Mamá Lykiana to honor her? Will you do that for me? She shall never be forgotten."

He tried to keep his composure when his son nodded hastily.

"Do you promise?" the King asked.

He nodded again. "I do."

The Prince had no idea that this would be the last conversation with his father. All the more seriously would he take his promise as soon as the time came.

"Stop crying! You're a Telmarine, a soldier!" Miraz yanked his nephew's chin up and grabbed him by the shoulders so he was forced to look at him. "Death is part of life! Pull yourself together!"

Caspian least expected evil when he wanted to see his father, but he had a sneaking suspicion when he ran into excited servants, teachers, council members, officers and noblemen in the hallway outside the King's chambers. The Prince tried to make his way through the chaos, but his uncle cut him off before he could even reach the door. Out of nowhere Miraz informed him that now, also his father had passed away because of an accident, and Caspian completely lost his edge. All he had left was his father, and with him gone, the Prince was all alone, like deer against the wolves - even if he was not yet fully aware of it.

"¡No llores!" Miraz shook him again. (3)

But tears ran down Caspian's face whether he wanted it or not - a rude order could not change that. The Prince wanted to hold his uncle's angry gaze, but the finality of what had happened was simply overwhelming.

"¿No lo entiendo, qué pasó? Why are they both gone now?" Caspian trembled, but it was in vain - Miraz would give him no answer. He was calm and stern, and no grief could be detected in his face. Caspian would only understand much later that his uncle was to blame for the death of his parents. (4)

"I want to see him!" the Prince urged as Miraz met his pleading gaze, but he only pushed him back into the corridor. "Por favor, por última vez..." (5)

"You can't!" Miraz shouted at him, not understanding how horrible he was making the situation. For all bystanders it was a gruesome demonstration of how roughly the King's brother treated his newly orphaned nephew, but no one dared to stop Miraz - as Regent he was now the most powerful man in the country.

"Will you stop crying!" he would not let go of him. "You are part of this family - we don't shed tears, no lloramos, nunca!" (6)

Miraz was entirely obsessed with teaching the boy coldheartedness by force and the Prince eventually tried to comply to his demands, whether it was healthy or not. However one thing it was for sure - it was the first time mistrust crossed his young face. The Prince drew in a couple of deep breaths and then lifted his chin almost defiantly to look at his uncle just as brashly.

"That's good, that's what I want to see," Miraz praised, "maybe your mother taught you some discipline after all."

It was the moment a chubby little Professor decided he could no longer watch the scenario in silence. "My Lord, the young Prince has just lost his father, too - don't you think he should be allowed to mourn and - " he began, but Miraz talked completely over him.

"Do not get involved in the upbringing of my nephew, Cornelius," Miraz warned him, his face darkly intent. Before he released him and sent him away with a maid, he tightened the grip on the Prince's narrow shoulders even more to say, "Caspian must control himself. Do you hear, Caspian? Pull yourself together! Learn to control your feelings!"

And that he did, probably way too young and much too well. Emilio knew that from the moment he met him when Caspian was just thirteen years old.

Emilio's father was one of Galmas most influential merchants, and one winter day his homesickness for Telmar was perfectly combinable with plans to rebuild his business on the mainland. Due to his wealth, Miraz's council soon realized that it could be of great advantage to welcome the shrewd businessman to their committee, and so he soon became an esteemed Lord.

Emilio first met the Crown Prince shortly after the summer had begun in Telmar, where hierarchy was written in capital letters, especially under Miraz. Yet when it came to the combat training of Telmar's sons, children of the high nobility practiced alongside the poorest from town and country.

All were treated equally, only performance mattered. Heaven only knew how much trouble Caspian would have had to face had he not caught on fast. But he was disciplined and in good form. One could tell even at his young age that life had not always been kind to him - he was not a kid from the streets, but he got through the exercises like one, without airs and graces nor lamentation. He was different from most sons of noblemen, who felt funny about the fact that the Prince hardly got along with them and preferred to be with the children from the gutter.

"¡Firmes!" one of the officers yelled at the colorful bunch that had gathered in the open field three weeks after the beginning of summer. It took a moment until the boys had finished their brawls and conversations, but eventually they obeyed. (7)

"Come on, don't be shy," the officer pushed the new one, Emilio, forward as though he wanted to present him to the others. "Chicos, this is Emilio. He just recently came back to Telmar with his family, so welcome him."

Emilio gulped when countless pairs of eyes suddenly followed him and he had no idea what to do with his hands, so he waved quite oddly.

"He's afraid of his own shadow," Cuervo whispered to Caspian, clearly amused. The boy owed his nickname, the Spanish word for raven, to his pitch-black hair, and possibly to the fact that he was taller than most other children of his age. The street kids saw him as a big brother and he had a close friendship with the Prince since their childhood.

"His father's that merchant Lord, isn't he?" Caspian asked under his breath and could not help but grin when Cuervo nodded and winked.

"Yes, just look how much Miraz's people like him…"

"The merits of bribery," Caspian agreed. "But he doesn't look like he'd suspect that."

"Should I enlighten him?" Cuervo chuckled, Caspian just shook his head trying not to laugh.

"Hello," Emilio finally coughed to greet the big group in an attempt to be polite. "I'm Emilio and… I'm very happy to be here…"

"Your father will do business with mine in the future," one of the boys informed him about what he found most important. Alenoz was a spoiled and arrogant child from a good family and his father in particular enjoyed a high reputation among the aristocratic society. "We'll certainly get along well," Alenoz added confidently, but Emilio was already convinced of the exact opposite the moment he had opened his mouth.

"Enough chattering, ¡manos al obra!" the officer finally pushed Emilio into the motley crew and Alenoz and his wealthy friends crowded him at once. (8)

Caspian almost pitied the new one.

"He won't ever get rid of Alenoz again," Cuervo said dryly as well.

"Sí, pobrecito," the Prince had to keep himself from laughing again. (9)

When they had finally reached the training ground, the officers announced the day's program for everyone to hear.

"Duel, chicos," it echoed through the rows and Cuervo and Caspian inwardly groaned. Emilio, on the other hand, got scared to death by the mere thought of it.

"Yet again?" Cuervo tried to protest. "I still have plenty of bruises from last week!"

"Shut it, Cirino," the officer gave a dismissive wave of his hand, using Cuervo's real name for a change. "This time you don't just get to pick your friends. You draw lots with the name of your partner, so get around here…"

He pulled a black bag out of his cloak and went through the rows with a stern expression.

"But isn't that unfair given our different body sizes and builds?" Alenoz whined while Cuervo giggled. The slender noble seemed to remember their last duel vividly.

"¡Que va!" barked the officer. "In a real fight you can't choose your opponent either. Each of you draws two names!" (10)

When it was his turn, Emilio already had a bad feeling as he put his hand into the bag to grab a lot, and he knew why immediately.

His little parchment said Caspian.

He had already heard a lot about the Prince, but he wondered how to appropriately approach him. But as Alenoz kept babbling about things he did not even want to know he simply decided to introduce himself to Caspian.

"Hey, where are you going?" Alenoz yelled.

"I've got to prepare myself for the duel…" Emilio mumbled and went over to the Prince.

Caspian was already in a scuffle, laughing out loud with Juanito, the boy who had drawn Cuervo's name and was the youngest of the street children. Emilio was a little hesitant to interrupt them at first, but when nobody would notice him for too long, he cleared his throat awkwardly to get their attention.

"Excuse me," Emilio said, causing Caspian to briefly turn around to him as though he had misheard. He quickly let go of the gurgling Juanito and glanced at the new boy in surprise.

Emilio began nervously, "Your Highness, I - "

"Your Highness? Did you hear that?" Juanito almost died laughing and slapped his hand on Caspian's arm. The Prince had to chuckle himself, but he held out his hand to Emilio immediately.

"No titles, just Caspian," he said when they shook hands.

"I'm Emilio."

"Sure, I got that by now," Caspian smirked.

"And you've already found a friend in Alenoz, too, Emilio," Cuervo joked as he joined them. "On the first day - immediately popular with the nobility - I'm impressed."

"It's probably just because of my father," Emilio suggested and made the tall street kid smile.

"Yes, sure - why else?" Cuervo patted him on the back and nodded.

A little huffy, Emilio turned back to Caspian.

"Well, I guess I should tell you that I drew your name. And I thought, before we begin, you might want to discuss how I… that I…"

He fell silent because he noticed that it was impossible for him to put his thoughts into words without offending the future King.

"Out with it," Caspian encouraged him, "what do you want to discuss?"

The others could hardly wait for his answer and Emilio was simply unable to rephrase what he was thinking.

"Well, I mean… How's this usually done? Should I let you win because you're the Prince? That would be no problem."

He could barely finish talking, Juanito and Cuervo already burst with laughter again. Emilio looked at Caspian a bit helplessly, but the Prince only smiled.

"¿En serio? You'd do that for me?" (11)

"Yes, sure," he was hesitant to nod.

"That's too kind," Caspian could not hold back his amusement. "But that won't be necessary…"

Emilio was quite puzzled when suddenly one of the officers shouted across the field.

"Who drew Izan?"

They turned around and Emilio was startled as soon as he saw the kid - Izan was a huge, stout boy, certainly not aristocratic and probably up to every trick. Emilio was glad he only drew Caspian.

"I did," the very Prince shouted to Emilio's surprise, and the new boy could not help but notice the strange indifference on Caspian's face. Did he not have to be afraid? Izan looked much stronger… But then Emilio remembered that surely everyone let the Prince win.

"Excuse me." Caspian walked past them, resigned to his fate to face Izan.

The boys about to fight winked at each other - Cuervo was a mutual friend - and Emilio heard an unfamiliar voice behind them, "Izan, you're a heavy lump - there's no excuse if you lose to my nephew."

Miraz, as usual boldly behaving like a King despite the lack of a crown, joined the circle that had formed around Izan and Caspian, and he sniffily added, "No offence, Príncipe..." (12)

"Since this is the first duel and His Majesty honors us with his presence, we'll all watch this one together," the officer announced, paying Miraz more respect than he actually deserved.

"They address him as King? Right in front of the rightful heir to the throne?" Emilio whispered to Cuervo. "Isn't that offending against every existing etiquette?"

"Miraz is not exactly a squeamish regent," Cuervo explained. "If they offend him, they're gambling away their future. They're all careful not to annoy him…"

Emilio gave it a thought and nodded, then he watched Izan and Caspian again. "He's going to let Caspian win, isn't he?"

Cuervo only raised an eyebrow and shook his head. "They're friends, Izan is one of us. But he'd never do that. Neither of us would. That's what the street has taught us."

Emilio, unable to reply, only gulped in horror.

"Vamos," Miraz clapped his hands. "Show me what you've learned. Fists allowed!"

"Are you sure, Your Majesty?" even the officer mumbled, but Miraz only nodded grimly, his gaze never leaving the boys about to fight.

Izan cracked his head from one side to the other while Caspian seemed to be inherently calm, although, from Emilio's point of view at least, he was about to get his head torn off.

But already Izan's first attempts to attack Caspian were a little too slow, almost cumbersome. He ran towards him, yet the Prince was much more agile and attentive than the big boy. Caspian had an excellent backing, even Miraz had to admit that as he watched Izan repeatedly miss him. And when Caspian hit him, it was a clean strike with pressure. Izan briefly shook his face like in a daze before he simply ran and threw himself at Caspian with full weight.

The ground was still muddy because of the last night's rain, and after wild twists and turns, the two soon looked like they came straight out a moorland.

"What if stones in the ground hit their heads, what if…" Emilio said under his breath and could not even put his concern into words.

"Yes, it's barbaric," Cuervo admitted to him and grinned, "he's doing well, isn't he? You'd probably be dead by now."

Emilio bit his lip and shrugged, "I get it, I don't have to let him win."

With a loud moan, Izan managed to roll on top of Caspian so that the Prince would not be able to escape. Izan punched him brutally in the face, several times, and everyone held their breath until Caspian managed to avoid one blow by suddenly moving his head to the side. To his surprise, the mud underneath Izan's fist was so sticky that he was distracted for a heartbeat long, and Caspian managed to throw him off. Before Izan could grasp it or rise, Caspian got him in a tight headlock. The heavy boy could not break free, so he threw himself back with force and brought them both down again. But despite Izan's brisk attempts to make him let go, Caspian did not loosen his grip. Not until it was clear that he had won the fight because Izan was running out of air.

"You can let go of him, Príncipe," one of the officers shouted and clapped, and Caspian immediately did as he was told.

Izan struggled for breath on his back and Caspian also let himself sink into the mud exhaustedly.

"Good fight," Izan coughed, then he shouted to Miraz, "Lo siento…" (13)

Miraz was obviously unnerved, but he forced himself to diplomatically say, "That's what you're practicing for after all. You need to get quicker."

Izan finally worked up the strength to rise again, and grinned as he pulled Caspian up as well. He punched him in the arm and they started laughing when the street boy winked.

"You really are a lump, tío," Caspian confirmed. "You've probably broken a couple of my ribs when you lay on top of me."

"You can take it," Izan joked and wiped the mud off his face like Caspian.

"All right, chicos, nothing more to see - get in your groups of two for the other duels," the officer insisted.

Miraz acknowledged Caspian with a stern nod, probably his form of silent recognition, then the regent turned his back on them and made his way to the castle again.

"¿Todo bien?" Cuervo asked when Caspian came back to them. (14)

"You took quite a beating," Emilio joined them and glanced at the Prince's bleeding lip with concern.

"No e' pa' tanto," Caspian mumbled and spat a bit of blood onto the ground when he tasted the iron on his lips. (15)

"Shouldn't a professor take a look at that?" Emilio asked anxiously, but Caspian only grinned.

"Before you've had the chance to beat me up as well? Surely not worth it…"

Emilio sighed and sang small, "I know by now, you'd rather beat me up."

"Don't worry, we always let the new ones win," Caspian winked and Emilio could not help but smile.

"Miraz wasn't very pleased when Izan lost," Cuervo remarked. "He'd have loved to see you on the ground…"

Caspian drew in a deep breath, then he said, "We don't get along well right now." And suddenly his face seemed to honestly mirror his real state of mind - lethargy.

"Did you do something stupid?" Cuervo wanted to know.

"Nothing in particular. I guess he's just afraid I might gradually get involved in governmental issues."

"And do you plan on doing so?" Juanito asked.

"No, I'm too young. All Kings before me were at least of age," Caspian said wearily. "No one would take me seriously and Miraz would only be fuming."

"Well," Cuervo said, "at least time's on your side."

The Prince gave a half-shrug and went ahead while the rest of them changed the subject, but Emilio was pensive by now.

He had lived very simply on Galma, his father never spoiled him despite of his wealth. And one thing he had taught him - knowledge of human nature. Emilio could read Caspian like an open book, even when nobody else did. He could not be fooled by the mischievous, carefree face the Prince showed to the world. He could tell that the tense relationship with Miraz put a strain on him, just like the everlasting grief for his parents.

And maybe Caspian did not even want to admit that to himself. He had internalized what Miraz had taught him as a child. He had learned not to show his feelings, and to control them. But at what cost?

Translations:

Pequeñito, vamos, no hace falta que te justifiques / like: Come on, little one, you don't need to explain yourself

1. ¿Y tú? / And you or what about you?

2. No llores / Don't cry

3. No lo entiendo, qué pasó / I don't understand, what happened?

4. Por favor, por última vez / Please, for the last time

5. No lloramos, nunca / We don't cry, never

6. Firmes / Attention or stand straight

7. Manos a la obra / Let's get to work

8. Sí, pobrecito / Like: Yes, poor little guy

9. ¡Que va! / Like: No way, not at all

10. En serio / seriously

11. Príncipe / Prince

12. Lo siento / I'm sorry

13. Todo bien / everything alright

14. No es para tanto / It's not that serious, it isn't that bad