"Why are we going to New York again?" Stefan asks falling on Elena's bed with a groan.
"Because, my dear Stefan, one of my best friends and your brother, who you wuv is in pain and we gotta be there for him." Elena replies in a teasing tone while laying her clothes out to pack.
"I don't see why we can't be there for him here." Stefan says helping Elena fold her clothes.
"Because he loves New York and he needs to feed from the vein, which he can't do here. This also gives us a chance to test a theory of mine."
"Which is?" He asks.
"I think if you let go of all your guilt, you'd be able to feed properly." She says making his eyes go wide.
"What? No way, El. I don't want to kill anyone." Stefan says shaking his head.
"And you won't. I'll be there every step of the way. Look, we'll get drunk, cry, and tell awesome stories, you know, bond. Then will go from there." She assures placing her hands on his shoulders.
At his scared and conflicted expression Elena continues,
"Hey, I'm not gonna force you to do anything. If we get there and you don't want to, that's completely fine. I just want you to be happy with yourself." She says with a shrug making Stefan smile and bring her into a hug.
"Blessèd All Hallows' Eve eve, my Darlings." Elena says sitting down at the outdoor table occupied by the entire Scooby Gang.
"Hey, El. Jer." Matt greets with a nod as they all say hello.
"You all packed, Ellie?" Caroline asks.
"Yep. This afternoon me and the delicious Salvatore brothers set off to the big city for wine, woman, and song." She says dreamily making the group laugh.
"How's Damon?" Bonnie asks.
"Heartbroken. But not as bad as last time, I guess." She shrugs as they nod.
"Well, tell him if he needs anything, we're here for him." Caroline says like the sweetheart that she is.
"Yes, and by anything, we mean anything." Vicki assures with a smirk emphasizing the last word making the boys groan and the girls laugh.
Elena hears a car horn and runs out the door with her bags, already having said her goodbyes.
Outside Stefan meets her and carries her bags to the car while she jumps over the door landing in the back seat.
"How you doing, Day?" Elena asks leaning over the seat as Stefan gets in the car.
"Good, actually. Better if you'd get your shoes off the leather." He says gesturing to the way she sitting.
"Sure thing. Love the car by the way, it just screams 'my dad never loved me.' " She teases sitting back and taking off her boots, making Stefan laugh and Damon bring a hand to his heart in mock betrayal.
"Must you bring up all my emotional trauma? I'm mourning a lost love, Ellie. Have some compassion." He scolds.
"I would never steal Stefan's thing." She says offended leaning forward and kissing Stefan's cheek making him smile and Damon roll his eyes.
Hopping out of Damon's car Elena looks at the hotel in awe.
"Holy shit! This place is the tits!" She exclaims making the brothers laugh as they get out of the car.
"I agree. Your Barbie done good." Damon says throwing arm around her shoulder as Stefan gets the bags.
After checking into - compelling - their room Elena falls on one of the beds with an exhausted groan.
"Alright, Salvatores. What's the game plan?" She asks sitting up as they fall down next to her.
"This was your idea, I'm just along for the ride." Damon says.
"And I'm just here to make sure he doesn't kill too many people." Stefan says pointing at Damon causing him too shrug and Elena laugh.
"Well then, since I'm in charge, let's get dress and go grab dinner." She says standing up as they nod.
"Man, I do not know how vegans do it. I mean, I respect them. But, goddamn." Elena says taking a seat at the bar reminiscing about the very rare steak she devoured.
"Ellie, I don't think I've ever seen someone so small eat so much." Damon says sitting down with the shocked face he's had since they left the restaurant.
"I figured, I'm only gonna have this body for so long, might as well enjoy it." She shrugs.
"Yes, but biologically you shouldn't have that body. You've drank at least one milkshake a day since I've met you." Damon argues as Stefan sits quietly looking around.
"It's all Amara, baby. We've got the gods to thank for our hot ass bods. Amara and Silas ate leaves and berries so we can look this good." Elena says tapping a distracted Stefan's shoulder.
"Huh?" Stefan ask when she gets his attention.
"I was just bragging about how hot we are. Where's your head at?" She ask him confused.
"Do you really think it's because of the guilt?" Stefan asks her making Damon turn to them confused.
"Definitely. Why? Do you want to to try feeding?" She asks causing Damon to choke on his drink.
"Uh, Ellie. You are aware of ripper Stefan, correct?"
"Yes, Ocean Eyes. But I think he only gets like that because of all the guilt he feels." She says.
"And? What, suddenly he doesn't feel guilty anymore?" Damon ask amusement covering his curiosity.
"Of course he does, it's Stefan. But most of his guilt comes from making you turn. And you guys worked that out, right?" She asked and they both nod with a small smile.
"So what else is there? Here." She says grabbing a napkin and the pen from the bartenders shirt pocket.
"Let's see, hooking out with Kat even though you knew Damon loved her too?" She asks them writing it down.
"Check" Damon says confirming they already made peace.
"Thinking he could trust your dad and getting her 'killed'?"
"Check." Stefan says.
"Killing your father?"
"Check."
"Who cares?" Stefan and Damon says at the same time making Elena smile in amusement.
"Forcing you to complete the transition?"
"Check." Damon says looking to his brother.
"From then on it's just ripper binges. So theoretically, if you could forgive yourself for killing all those people, then your golden." She says clicking the pen and turning to him.
"How exactly do I do that?" Stefan asks making Elena turn to Damon.
"How do you do it? You've killed tons of people, even with your humanity." Elena asks.
"Like Ellie said at the diner. Top of the food chain. They're our food, Stef. You don't see her all teary eyed for the cow she just ate." He says gesturing to Elena.
"As much as I enjoy you comparing humans to livestock, I think it's different." Elena says.
"How?" Damon scoffs out.
"Humans have been conditioned to accept it. Since we were kids, we were taught that that's just what you do. If everyone in the world is doing something horrible, but don't think so, is it really so bad?" She asks never having thought about it before.
"So do that." Damon says gesturing to Elena with his glass.
"What?" Stefan asks still confused.
"Accept it. Come to terms with the fact that humans are your food. You don't feel guilty about feeding on them, you feel guilt about killing them, which makes you kill them because you feel guilty, which makes you kill some more. It's a vicious cycle." Elena says.
"Just like that?" Stefan asks disbelieving.
"No, babe. It might take more than one conversation to change your entire thinking. Let's just hang out, okay? Don't worry so much. Remember? This is the first time to act like a real modern teenager. And we modern teens like to bury all our emotions under layers of false tranquility. And booze." She finishes taking Damon's drink and draining it.
"Right here mister barkeep." She hits the bar with her hand making the bartender turn to her with a brow raised in amusement.
"9 shots of your finest bourbon. And one of your fruitiest cocktails, por favor." She says making the brothers laugh and the bartender ask for her ID.
When Damon goes to compel him she puts a hand on his should with a mischievous smirk reaching into her bag.
"Katherine Pierce? 23, huh." The bartender says turning around to get their drinks.
"Seriously?" The older Salvatore asks incredulous throwing her into a fit of giggles.
"Christ, Ellie. Who the hell taught you to drink like this?" Damon asks her through a laugh as she slams back her ninth shot.
"Dude, I've been 'drinking like this' since I was 13." She says.
"No way." Damon replies shaking his head.
"It's true! Everyone thinks raising your kids is a small town will be good, but in reality we're so bored we just start partying early."
"Seriously?" Stefan asks.
"Yep. Small town kids are wild as fuck." She says sipping her cocktail.
"Is this what we're gonna do? Drink? I mean, I'm not opposed, I just thought you'd come of with something crazy." Damon states a little spaced.
"Tomorrow's Halloween and I didn't want your emotions to get in the way of my favorite holiday so, tonight we drink, tomorrow we party." She raises her glass.
"Hear, hear!" Stefan exclaims way to loudly, in his drunken state.
"Honestly, Stef. Ellie's had more than you. Tighten up." Damon reprimands his brother in an amused tone.
"What do you think would have happened if Katherine never came to town?" Stefan asks out of the blue surprising the rest of the trio.
"I would've died on the battlefield as some nameless soldier, fighting for something I didn't even believe in." Damon punctuates by taking a shot.
"Right. You were in the confederacy. Gross." Elena says with a disgusted face.
"I didn't believe in it. I just wanted to make my dad proud."
"Still gross." She says making him shrug.
"Do you think I would've gotten married or had kids?" Stefan asks off in his own world.
"If your friend knew something that they should probably tell you, but don't want to, because it would only cause you pain. Would you want to know?" Elena asks them way less subtle than she planned, thinking about Lillian and Valerie.
"You're very clearly talking about yourself. What do you know?" Damon asks her.
"Just answer the question" she says.
"Umm, sure. Wait, no. Maybe." Stefan says making the others laugh at his drunk state.
"I want to do it!" Stefan states loudly slamming his glass down.
"On the bar?" Elena ask with a raised brow.
"He means feed, you pervert." Damon laughs out.
"Okay. Take your pick." Elena says gesturing to the bar patrons.
As Stefan stand is to find his 'prey' Elena notices Damons sorrowful expression.
"Woah. What's going on up here?" Elena asks tapping his temple lightly.
"Did she ever love me?" He asks her making her rub his back gently.
"That's wasn't rhetorical. In the other timeline did she ever explain why she did what she did?"
"Yes, but I don't think it will make you feel better."
"I know what will though." She says after a few moments of contemplation cause him to raise a brow.
"More bourbon." She says calling the bartender over.
"I'M A VAMPIRE!!!" A very intoxicated Stefan yelled getting the trio kicked out of the bar.
"Why did they kick us out? Is it because I'm a vampire?" Stefan asks sadly grabbing Elena's hand.
"I think so. Prejudice bastards!" Elena yells at the building making Damon laugh and pull her away.
"Come on, I know a better place." Damon says.
"Does it hurt to be around me 'cause I look like her?" Elena asks curiously.
"No, you're too different. You don't have to stay away or anything." He says hoping she won't.
"Oh, I wasn't gonna stay away. I was just wondering." She says with shrug trying to hide a smirk.
"You're an asshole." Damon says with a laugh.
"I know." Elena replies with smile.
"You know honestly, I don't even care that much. So what if she faked her death? It happens." Damon says doing a shot making Elena nod her head.
"I know! I mean sure, she was smokin' hot, dangerous, mysterious, and made you see the world differently... What was I saying?" Elena asks after spacing out.
Percy Sledges 'When a Man Loves a Woman' plays as Damon takes a swig from the bottle of bourbon he's hugging.
"Why did she do it, Ellie? I would've done anything for her." He says laying his head on Elenas shoulder.
"I know, buddy. She doesn't deserve you." Elena comforts him.
"I mean, what more could I do? I gave her my whole heart. I died for her. I let her sleep with my little brother." Damon says turning to Ellie.
"I don't have any more brothers, Ellie!" He cries out, dramatically dropping his head to the bar.
It was right about here where Ellie blacked out.
To Be Continue...