Beca is sitting at her desk, with the chair turned so she can look at Lucy. She's letting out little hums and moans in her sleep. Beca bites her thumb nail and swivels the chair back and forth. She hasn't been able to take her eyes off of her sister; afraid that if she looks away, she'll take a turn for the worse.
Chloe walks into the room, and leans against the desk. Lucy is asleep in the middle of their bed. Her face is pale and her hair is pushed back, stray pieces stuck to her face with sweat.
"Hey, how was brunch?" Beca asks, keeping her voice to a quiet whisper.
"It was good." Chloe sighs, "But I think there's something Fletcher isn't telling me."
"Like what?"
"I don't know, I think maybe he has a girlfriend back in Alabama. There's a reason he isn't as excited as he should be about the job in New Jersey."
"So if he gets it, do you think he'll take it?"
Chloe shrugs, "I don't know. I don't even know if I'm right. I just have a feeling."
"I know what you mean."
"What are you talking about?"
"There's something Lucy isn't telling us. She's been upset about something for days but I don't know what it is."
"I guess I hadn't noticed." Chloe says, guilt tints her tone and Beca reaches out for her hand.
"You've been a little preoccupied. She's just been a little different lately, quieter, I guess. At first, I thought it was just because your family was here and she can be shy around new people, but I think it's something else."
"Do you think it was because she was coming down with whatever this is?'
Beca shrugs, mirroring Chloe's body language, "Maybe. Sometimes I wish I could read her mind."
"It would certainly make things a lot easier."
Beca gets up and walks over to the bed. She places her palm gently on Lucy's head. It's just as hot as it has been every other time she's checked. She was hoping that it would magically be cool and she would wake up feeling better.
"Bec, she's okay. Let's let her sleep. She'll call for us if she needs us."
Chloe knows it takes a lot for Beca to leave her. She can feel the same anxiousness radiating off of her as this morning. Fletcher is sitting in one of the armchairs in the living room, looking out the large picture window, down to the street below. When he hears their voices he turns and smiles.
"I bet you never get sick of this view."
"Not really, no." Beca says, "You could have one like it pretty soon, right?"
He stiffens, just slightly. If Chloe hadn't said anything to her, Beca isn't sure she would have even noticed. But Chloe was right, there's something he isn't saying.
"Yeah, I guess so. But it's not a done deal or anything."
"Maybe not, but it's still big." Beca says, she means it.
She doesn't know Fletcher super well. She's met him a handful of times and they've talked during Chloe's FaceTime calls with him, not to mention she's heard a million and one stories about him from their childhood. She sees a lot of similarities between the two of them; their smile, their eyes, their optimism and willingness to help. She likes him and hopes that whatever he's hiding isn't something bad.
"How's Lucy?"
"Uh, I don't really know. Time will tell, I guess." Beca says, doing her best not to squirm.
"I asked one of my buddies to take me to the airport tonight, that way neither of you have to leave her."
"Are you sure?" Chloe asks, Beca can tell this is devastating her; having to say goodbye to almost her entire family within a day of each other.
"Yeah sure, she needs you more than me right now."
Another knife to the gut. It's not what he meant and Chloe knows that, but she also doesn't want to admit that he's right. She gives a sad smile and a slight nod.
"He'll be here at five."
That's only four hours from now and each minute that ticks by is a reminder that come five o'clock tonight, Chloe's family will be spread out across four states once again. She feels a little silly, feeling this sad about it. She can still pick up the phone and hear her mother's voice, or FaceTime her brothers to see their faces. She's lucky. The sound of Lucy's weak, whimpering voice wishing for her mother comes back to her mind and she has to close her eyes to push aside the nauseating guilt that flows over her.
"Chlo, you okay?" Fletcher asks, a calloused hand pressed against his sister's forearm.
"Yeah, I'm just gonna miss you."
"Same here. But who knows, maybe in a month or so, I could be right back here and you'll be begging me to get the hell out of here."
It doesn't feel completely genuine, more so than before, but still not reassuring. She gives a little laugh and sniffles.
"Well, when you put it that way..."
Fletcher's friend, Luca, comes to get him at five o'clock. As soon as he walks through the door Chloe recognizes him as one of Fletcher's roommates from college. She's met him a few times. He was always pleasant, someone that she didn't mind her brother hanging around with. Fletcher, for as wonderful as he is, doesn't have the best track record when it comes to picking friends; at least he didn't until he went to college.
"Chloe, it's nice to see you, again."
"You too." She puts her hand on Beca's arm, "This is my girlfriend, Beca. Bec, this is Luca. He and Fletch were roommates in college."
"Nice to meet you." Beca greets, diplomatically. Chloe can tell it's killing her to be here having trivial conversation while her sister is in the other room, out of sight.
"You too. Fletch, we should probably go before we hit too much traffic."
"Right, uh, yeah okay." Fletcher reaches his arms out and closes his eyes as soon as Chloe is wrapped up in them. He kisses the top of her head and rests his cheek against it for a second. "I love you."
"I love you too."
There are so many things they could say, but they leave it for another time. Chloe pulls away first, knowing if she doesn't do it now, she won't ever let him go. She wraps her own arms around her torso and smiles with watery eyes and a heavy breath.
"I'll see you guys soon, okay? And Beca, thanks for inviting me."
"Any time." She says, and he knows she means it. "Have a safe flight."
"Okay, I'll see ya."
Beca can tell he's trying not to cry. She can hear it in his voice and see it in the way he grabs his bag and leaves the apartment faster than she's seen him move in five days. Once the door is closed behind them, Chloe lets out a shuddery exhale. Beca wraps her arms around her, letting her rest her forehead in the crook of her neck.
She holds her for as long as she needs. She can feel gentle tremors moving Chloe's rib cage and the tenseness of her shoulder muscles. She can hear in her breath the way she is trying to make them even, struggling against the small hiccups fighting their way through her diaphragm. Beca would never understand the quiet devastation that came with saying goodbye to family when it isn't forever; but she sees it in Chloe after every visit.
"Are you okay?"
"Mhm, you should go check on Lucy."
"I'm sure she's fine. But I can go check on her if you need a minute alone."
Chloe gives one, definitive, nod of her head and Beca leaves the room, not needing to be told twice.
Beca pushes the door to her bedroom open. It lets out a small creak but the sound doesn't do anything to disturb Lucy. She is still sound asleep in the middle of the bed. She has one foot peaking out from under the duvet and a half-curled fist up near the side of her face. Her hair is in a ponytail but large sections are starting to come free from the elastic, splaying curls across the grey pillowcase.
Her breathing is labored, the congestion in her nose and chest makes it audible, even across the room. Beca walks over and presses a kiss to her forehead. She eases herself down onto the mattress, careful not to jostle her too much; not that she thinks it would wake her even if she did. She leans down on an elbow to watch her sleep. Now, with her sister here, she can understand what Chloe is feeling; she knows that being apart from Lucy, any distance, for any reason, would kill her.
"How is she?" Chloe's voice disturbs the thought, and she's thankful for it.
"The same, I think. She's still sleeping, that's good, right?"
Chloe nods. She walks over and lays down against Beca on the edge of the bed. Beca shuffles giving her what little space she is able. She kisses the spot just below Chloe's ear and sighs.
"I wish your family wasn't so far from you."
Chloe smiles. Her eyes glint against the yellow light of the bedside lamp and Beca hopes, desperately, that the glitter that has returned in these past few days, doesn't disappear now.
"Thank you, baby. Me too. But our life is here and they understand that."
"And you understand that?"
Beca treads, carefully, she doesn't want to upset Chloe but she also needs to know where her thoughts are amongst the messiness of their life's situation.
"Of course I do. I never would have agreed to come here with you if I thought I couldn't handle it. I knew what I was getting into with you."
"And what's that?"
"Forever."
Beca can't help her own smile now. Chloe gives a chuckle when she turns her head to get a look at Beca's face and she sees a mixture of cockiness and surprise.
"Don't give me that look. You fell way harder than I did at first."
"You're dreaming, Beale."
They both fall asleep waiting for Lucy to wake up. Beca wakes to the darkness outside and a painfully numb feeling in her left arm. Chloe is sound asleep, with her body resting on her arm. Beca's attention is pulled from the pain when she hears Lucy groan next to her.
Her eyes are open, just barely, but Beca can tell she isn't just waking up. She reaches over with her right arm, the one that still feels attached to her body, and she puts her palm on her forehead. It feels a lot hotter than before with the lack of medication in her system.
"Beca." The end of her name falls into a breathless gasp.
"Yeah Scout, I'm here. What hurts?"
"Everything."
With the sound of voices and the movement of Beca's body, Chloe wakes up and turns. Lucy is a ghostly white shade. The dark circles under eyes have deepened to a purple color and there's a quake to her voice when she speaks.
"Beca." She says again, it's a plea. Beca just wished she knew for what.
She grabs the thermometer from the side table and guides it under Lucy's tongue. The time it takes to beep feels like an eternity. The darkness of the room drapes over them like a blanket and Beca wishes it were still day time; everything feels less threatening in the day.
"102.7." Chloe says, taking the thermometer from Lucy's mouth.
"That's really high, right? That's too high. We need to go to the hospital or call Stacie or something." Beca says, hopping up to pace the room.
"Calm down." Chloe stands and puts both hands on Beca's shoulders. "We're going to try to cool her first."
At the first sign of Chloe having any idea of what to do, Beca calms, just slightly, and listens to the instructions.
"How do we do that?"
"I'm going to get some cool cloths for her head and neck."
Chloe speaks slowly and calmly, like she's done this a million times. She leaves the room for a just a minute or two, returning with a bowl of cool water and a few wash cloths. Beca watches her stick them in the bowl, wring them out, then place it on Lucy's head. Lucy uses a weak hand to try and bat her away but Chloe takes her hand, kisses it, and places it gently back on the bed. She leans over and kisses Lucy's head. Speaking quietly into her ear, she says,
"You're okay, sweet girl. We're going to get you better."
It's a long night of worry for both Beca and Chloe. They stay by Lucy's bedside while she groans and coughs and sheds tears. Chloe keeps cool cloths on Lucy's neck and forehead and holds her through her bouts of dizziness. Beca calls Stacie, and asks a million questions, and lays next to Lucy, holding her hand humming gentle melodies to try and keep her calm and relaxed. She isn't sure any of it is working until around four in the morning when Lucy's fever breaks. She sweats through two different shirts before falling asleep in Beca's arms. Beca falls asleep soon after, her head resting on top of her sister's.
Chloe watches them for almost an hour; at awe of her life. She meant what she said to Beca, forever. She can't imagine being anywhere but here. She leans over and kisses both of their foreheads before curling up on her side to get a little sleep.
—
"I can stay home one more day." Beca says, hesitating by the door with her keys in her hand.
"Oh my God, Beca, go to work. I'm fine." Lucy says, from her spot on the couch.
"You were on death's door last night but now you're fine?"
Lucy gives a half smirk and shakes her head before letting it fall back against the couch. Beca can tell she still isn't feeling well but she isn't about to admit that to her and make her miss another day of work. Beca doesn't want her out of her sight but she has a busy day at work and she knows she can't really miss it. She walks back over and gives Lucy one last kiss on the head, choosing to ignore her groan.
"Beca?"
"Yeah?" Beca keeps her crouched position so she is face to face with her sister. "What's up?"
"I'm sorry."
Beca smirks, "Yeah, you should be."
Lucy shakes her head slowly and speaks, like she's sharing a secret. Her tone makes Beca's smirk disappear.
"No, I'm sorry, I asked for my mom."
"I didn't think you remembered that, your fever was so high."
Lucy licks her lips and swallows, so thick Beca can hear it, "It's not like you guys aren't good enough. I just-"
"You don't have to explain anything, okay? And don't be sorry."
Lucy nods again. The look in her tired eyes makes it clear that she is trying not to be, but the guilt still shines through.
"I'm gonna go. I'll see you both tonight. I love you."
"We love you too." Chloe calls back from her spot in the kitchen where she is making tea. She hadn't heard their conversation and Lucy is a little grateful for it.
Beca closes the door behind her.
"She's annoying." Lucy says, with a playful tint to her voice.
"She has a point. You were very sick last night. You gave us a good scare," Chloe says, honestly. She walks over and gives Lucy the mug, "How are you feeling now?"
"I'm okay."
There is still a raspiness to her voice that isn't usually there and her color hasn't returned yet.
"You're a bad liar."
Lucy puts the tea down; she hadn't really wanted it in the first place but she could tell that Chloe was itching for something to keep herself busy. Instead she chooses to rest her head against Chloe's shoulder and closes her eyes. Chloe was right, she still didn't feel well but she was never a good patient.
—
Beca walks into work and sighs when she hears the usual chaos of the label. There are people rushing in every direction with equipment and paperwork. She makes a beeline for the coffeemaker to get her second cup of the day. Staying up until four-thirty and then coming in for a full day isn't necessarily ideal working conditions but she has to push through her exhaustion.
"Rough night last night, Mitchell?" Anderson asks, coming to lean against the wall next to her.
"You could say that."
"Everything okay?" His smirk disappears when he notices the look on her face.
"Yeah, it's fine. Lucy's sick and we were up most of the night with her."
"Sick how?"
"The flu or a virus or something. She's okay now, but it's just, it's the first time she's been sick since, you know, everything, and it was pretty scary.
"I bet. You sure you should be here?"
"Yeah," Beca waves her hand in a noncommittal gesture, "Chloe's home with her. I need to be here."
Anderson doesn't say anything else. He knows she's still finding her balance between being a mother, or whatever it is she is now, and working full time in a demanding job. He admires her, although he isn't sure he'll ever say that to her face, not that she'd hear it even if he did.
—
Lincoln walks up to Matteo in the hallway halfway through the school day. She hadn't seen Lucy yesterday and there's still no sign of her today. She wanted to text her but there was something in her gut telling her not to. She pushes his shoulder to make him turn and face her.
"Hey, you seen Lucy?"
"She's not here." He says.
He's been quiet the past couple days and Lincoln knows something is wrong.
"What's going on, did something happen to her?" When he doesn't say anything she asks again, with agitation in her voice, "Matteo, tell me. You and Poppy have been weird for like a week now."
"Talk to Poppy," He says with a resigned sigh, "last time I got involved it didn't go so well."
He slings his bag over his shoulder and walks down the hall. Lincoln wishes she knew why Lucy had become so much of her focus lately. She can't figure out what it is about this girl that makes her worry so much.
—
Chloe is sitting in one of the armchairs in the living room, watching Lucy sleep. She's wrapped up in one of the fleece blankets, her breathing is slow and relaxed, although still very congested. Her hair is pulled back in a French braid, Chloe didn't want it on her back after her shower. Chloe can't get the sound of her voice from the night before out of her head.
"Chlo?"
Chloe is pulled out of her thoughts and gives a gentle smile. She hadn't seen Lucy's eyes flutter open, or her arm come free from the blanket to push herself up. She keeps the blanket around her shoulders and leans against the back cushion of the couch; she's still exhausted.
"What do you need, sweet girl?"
"Can you come sit with me?"
Chloe doesn't need to be asked twice. She moves over and sits with an arm around Lucy's shoulders and the other hand resting on her knee. She moves her thumb back and forth against Lucy's sweatpants.
"How are you feeling?"
"A little better. How did I get so sick?"
"It's probably just a virus. You've been busy with school and lacrosse." Chloe's mind goes back to what Beca said to her the day before and she continues. "Stress can cause us to get sick too. Is there something on your mind or something that's making you more stressed than usual."
She can feel Lucy tense next to her but she doesn't say anything.
"Because if there's something going on, you can always tell us."
Still silence. Lucy wonders how Chloe could possibly know. She hadn't even mentioned it to Beca, hadn't brought it up with Thea and now she isn't sure she wants to because she's thinking there's a mole; she's sick of people talking about her behind her back.
She stands up and adjusts her shirt before clearing her throat; it's still sore and she regrets it immediately but she isn't sure she would be able to get this sentence out otherwise.
"Nope. I'm going to lay down in my bed."
Chloe is left alone, in the silence, the way she is more often than not lately and she sighs. She rubs her temples with her pointer and middle fingers. Beca was right; mind reading powers would be great right about now.
—
"Hey Poppy." Lincoln calls out, as she leaves the front entrance of the school.
"Oh hey, what's up?"
Poppy pushes her hair behind her ear, and focuses her gaze down at Lincoln's shoes; something she never does. Lincoln crosses her arms over her chest and speaks, brusquely,
"What the hell did you say to Lucy?"
"What are you talking about?"
"You've been weird for days, Lucy suddenly is nowhere to be found. When I asked, Matteo said I should talk to you. So what happened?"
Poppy looks up and squints against the sunshine. She clears her throat but keeps quiet.
"It's so bad you won't even tell me?"
"Why do you care? You were my friend first, you should be on my side."
"On your side of what?" Lincoln asks, exasperated.
"I mean, you know."
Lincoln shrugs, "I really don't. Care to share?"
Poppy walks over to the stone bench and sits, waiting for Lincoln to follow before she continues.
"After the whole Halloween thing, my dad said I can't be friends with her. Too much trouble."
"So you're just going to drop her because your dad said so?"
Poppy lifts her shoulders in a shrug, letting them drop further down when she relaxes, "Don't see any other choice."
"You could tell him to shove it."
"You know I can't do that."
"I know you won't do it. There's a difference."
Lincoln stands back up and grips one of her backpack straps in her fist.
"So you're going to take her side in this." It isn't a question, but the tone makes Lincoln's stomach feel like it's on fire.
"There shouldn't be sides. The right choice is pretty obvious. We've been friends for a long time, Pop, and I've kept quiet about a lot, because of everything with your mom and whatever, but I thought you were better than this."
"Yeah, everyone always does. Guess I'm not."
—
Beca's feet are almost numb and her head is pounding by the time she leaves work. The day was long and demanding and she just wants to be home, on the couch with Chloe and Lucy, but she is stuck waiting for Matt and Theo to finish with their newest artist before she can go anywhere.
She is sitting in her office chair, absentmindedly spinning back and forth. She's looking out the window but she's so tired she can barely get her eyes to focus on anything. There's a clearing of someone's throat that pulls her attention to the doorway. Anderson is standing there, leaning against it, hands in his pockets, his suit jacket is slung over his leather messenger bag, and his usual smirk is placed firmly on his face, but even he looks exhausted.
"Hey, what's up?"
"Nothing, I saw the light still on in here and was coming to turn it off. I thought you had left, like, hours ago."
"Oh, nope, I'm still here. I've gotta wait for Matt and we all know that guy is on his own timetable."
Anderson nods slowly and pushes himself to stand up straight. He shifts between his heels and the balls of his feet. His gaze is unsettled, looking around the room.
"Are you going home?" Beca asks, when the silence goes on a little too long.
"Uh, probably, unless you wanted to grab a drink or something."
He finally looks into her eyes and she can tell why he didn't before; it's not exhaustion, it's loneliness. She hasn't seen anything like it in his expression before, not around their coworkers, but now, it's just the two of them, and it's very clear.
"Oh, I would, but I really should get back home to check on Lucy."
"Right, yeah, tell her to feel better, alright? I'll see you tomorrow."
He starts out of the room and Beca feels like she might as well have just slapped him across the face. She clears her throat and speaks, quickly, to stop him.
"But can I get a rain check?"
"Yeah, definitely."
"Okay, cool. I'll see you tomorrow."
He smiles and leaves. She wishes she hadn't spent so much time hating him, but she makes a silent promise to make more of an effort to be his friend; something makes her think he really needs it.
—
The next day, Lucy stays home from school just to be safe. She is sitting on the couch working on homework when Beca walks through the door. She lets out a dramatic sigh and throws herself down next to her sister.
"Long day?" Lucy asks, with a lifted eyebrow.
"You could say that. How are you feeling?"
"A lot better."
"Good. You think you can handle school tomorrow?"
Lucy nods, but her stomach fills with butterflies. She wishes she had lied and said she still wasn't feeling well. She isn't ready to face her friends, or whatever they're considered now. She wants to stay cuddled on the couch under her blankets for another week, but she knows that's no longer a possibility.
"Where's Chloe?"
"Uh, I don't know," Lucy says, now completely distracted, "she went in your room a while ago and I haven't seen her since."
Beca pushes herself off the couch, despite her entire body's protest. She kicks her shoes off before walking down the hall and pushing their bedroom door open. Chloe is laying in the bed, facing away from the door. Beca climbs on the bed behind her and wraps an arm around her waist.
"Hey babe, you okay?"
"Yeah," her voice is a hoarse whisper, "how was work?"
"Long. How were things here?"
"Quiet."
Chloe rolls over to be face to face with Beca. There's no smile but no hint of unhappiness either; her expression is unreadable.
"You sure you're okay?"
"Yeah, just tired."
Beca kisses her forehead, "You're really warm, baby."
There's a quiet, almost inaudible groan that gives away Chloe was aware, but just didn't want to admit it to herself.
"You must be getting what Lou had. What do you need?"
"Just some sleep, I think. I really don't feel that bad."
"Not yet, maybe, but we saw how intense her fever was. Have you taken any medicine?"
Chloe shakes her head and lets her whole body relax. Beca hops up and gets to work. She gets medicine and helps Chloe change into her pajamas and runs her fingertips through her hair until she's asleep. Lucy pokes her head in a while later.
"Is she okay?"
"Yeah, I think she is coming down with what you had."
"I got her sick too?"
"It's not your fault, Lou. Go get some sleep, alright?"
Lucy walks over and reaches her arms out and Beca wraps her up in a hug, placing a gentle kiss on her hair.
"Love you." Lucy says, into her shoulder.
"Love you too."
Lucy walks into her room, closes her curtains and climbs into her bed. The sheets still smell like the lavender laundry detergent and it helps to relax her. She checks her phone; not that she's expecting much and she's proven right when there aren't any notifications. She sets her alarm and sighs, turning off the light.
Sleep doesn't come easy for her. She spends most of the night tossing and turning, running through every possible scenario that could meet her in the morning.
—
Beca wakes with Chloe wrapped around her. Her skin is hot to the touch and her cheeks are bright red. She kisses her forehead and she knows that she's in for another long couple days but she can't say she's surprised; Chloe has been putting so much pressure on herself lately, she was bound to get sick.
"Morning."
"Good morning, I would ask how you're feeling but I think I already know the answer."
"I'm fine." Chloe says, her congestion making it sound more like, 'I'm find'.
"You're fine, right. Your raging fever and shivering tell me otherwise. I'm going to get you some medicine and get Lucy ready for school. Don't you dare move."
Lucy is already dressed, eating cereal in the kitchen when Beca walks out. She pours the correct amount of DayQuil into the little measuring cup, all the while she can feel Lucy's eyes on her and she knows she's feeling guilty.
"We're leaving in twenty minutes, Lou."
"Okay."
Each minute that ticks by makes her stomach coil tighter and tighter. She could tell Beca she's gotten worse again, but she knows she won't believe her; she can always tell when she's lying. So she concedes to her fate, dumps her bowl in the sink and grabs her bag.
"This is kind of weird." She says.
"What is?"
"You taking me to school."
"It's weird? Fine I won't do it anymore." Beca smirks.
"I didn't say I didn't like it. Although, Chloe usually takes me to get a smoothie before school."
"I may be a little out of touch with your routine, but I'm not stupid."
"Yeah, I didn't think it would work, but I had to give it a shot."
"Mhm."
The cool November air sends a shiver down Beca's spine and she regrets not wearing a thicker jacket. She watches Lucy's expression fade back into the worried one that's been there for the past few months; she wishes she could make it disappear.
"You okay?"
"Yeah, just still trying to shake the virus, I think."
Beca eyes her.
"Okay, I'm taking the day off to stay with Chlo, so I'll be here to pick you up at three."
"Alright."
Lucy stops when they get to the front of the school. She hasn't been at school for a whole week but to her it feels like months, it feels oddly unfamiliar. She doesn't want to walk up those steps because she knows as soon as she's inside she will have to face everything she's been avoiding. She takes a deep breath and gives a small wave to Beca before walking in.
—
Beca walks back into their apartment and is met with nothing but the gentle hum of the refrigerator. She makes some coffee and cleans up the mess of the morning before peeking into their room. Chloe is sound asleep, one arm outstretched across the mattress, the other hand is curled into a fist by her cheek on the pillow. Beca fixes the blankets around her and kisses her head, glad to feel the medicine has done a little to lower her temperature.
Chloe's phone chimes on the bedside table with a message from Fletcher, followed by a few from the rest of her family; a group chat she assumes. Beca silences it and creeps back out of the room.
—
Lucy takes her seat in her English class and waits for the other kids to file in. She made sure to get to her desk early, in hopes of avoiding eye contact with Poppy or Matteo. Matteo walks in first and stops in the doorway when he sees her sitting there. He walks, slowly, over to the desk right behind her. He leans forward and speaks quietly, which she knows isn't easy for him.
"Lucy, can I just-"
Lucy turns and the look on her face makes him stop and sit back. When Poppy walks in she doesn't pause, she just walks quickly over to her own seat and keeps her gaze fixed on the board in the front of the room.
As soon as the bell rings, Lucy jumps up and rushes out of the room. She doesn't want to talk to them; they've made it very clear where their loyalties lie and she knows it's not with her. When she walks into her biology class, she knows there's no avoiding Lincoln. They're lab partners, and she doesn't want to avoid her. She's a little upset she hasn't called or texted her but she also knows Lincoln has played no role in all of this.
"Hey Peach."
"Uh hey, sorry I've been MIA."
"Eh, it's okay," Lincoln gives an easy smile and it eases some of the anger, "we all have to just dip for a while sometimes."
"I was sick."
"Oh really? What kind of sick."
Lucy takes her seat and looks over at her, she had forgotten how much taller Lincoln always feels when they're next to each other.
"Just a virus. But I'm all good now."
"That's good. It's sucked around here without you."
They fall into silence until class starts. Neither of them know what to say; they don't know what the other knows; neither want to be the one to broach the subject. It isn't until there's a lull in the lecture, while they're supposed to be taking notes when Lincoln whispers,
"Poppy's an idiot."
—
Chloe walks out into the living room around two, having just woken up. Her legs feel wobbly and her head is swimming. Beca is on the couch, her laptop propped on her knees while she answers email after email.
"Hi." She says, barely able to get the word out.
"Well hello there." Beca smiles and closes her laptop. "How you feeling?"
"Tired, but okay. You didn't have to stay home with me. I'm a big girl, you know?"
Beca shrugs, "I know, but everyone deserves to feel like someone is there for them when they're sick, right?"
Chloe gives a sleepy smile at the use of her own words.
"Mhm, thank you."
—
"Hey Peach wait up." Lincoln calls out to Lucy.
Lucy turns in the almost empty hallway. The final bell has just rung and as usual everyone has run out, ready to get home.
"What's up?"
"Look, I know things are weird right now. I just feel like you're mad at me and I want you to know that I had nothing to do with what happened with Poppy."
"I know."
"But you're still pissed at me."
"Not because of Poppy."
"Then what?"
Lucy thinks about lying but she knows it's no use.
"You knew something was going on and you, I mean, you didn't, like, text me or anything."
Lincoln nods and looks down at her own hands, wringing in front of her.
"Yeah, I'm sorry."
Lucy shrugs, "It's alright."
"No, it's not. Sometimes I try so hard to stay out of things that it backfires and I just look like an ass."
Poppy scoffs and nods, she can't really disagree this time around.
"I really am sorry. I should have tried to talk to you. Matteo and Poppy were being weird but weren't really saying anything and I didn't want to butt in."
"I get it. Besides, you and Poppy have known each other forever. I'm the new kid."
"That doesn't matter to me. Poppy is, well, she's my friend but I think that's just because she was one of the only people that ever tried to be my friend for, like, a really long time. And Matteo came as part of the package. I never really felt like I fit with them but I didn't have anywhere else to go."
Lucy understands. Poppy and Matteo seemed to latch to her the second she walked into the school and she went along with it, so desperate for friends.
"Matteo is who he is; he doesn't really mean harm but he doesn't stand up for himself either. And Poppy's always been a goody-goody. She does everything any adult tells her to do."
"Isn't that what kids are supposed to do?"
"No. Not when they're wrong. And her dad is wrong. He knows he can't control you and everything that comes along with you. That scares him. It's the same reason he doesn't like me all that much."
"But he hasn't told Poppy she can't be friends with you."
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's just so he doesn't sound elitist. I am scholarship kid after all, and with my dad in jail... appearances are very important to people like Mr. Weaver."
"And I don't fit that image, do I?"
Lincoln looks sad, sympathetic, more so than anyone else could be. She shakes her head and sighs.
"No, I don't think you do."
"So what do we do now?"
Lincoln smiles and wraps an arm around Lucy's shoulders, walking her out the front entrance of the school where Beca is standing, waiting for her.
"You go home with your rockstar sister and I go home to my microwave dinner and we FaceTime tonight about the biology homework." There's a hint of humor in Lincoln's eyes and Lucy feels lighter.
"And tomorrow?"
"Eh, we figure that out when it comes."
Lucy lets out a long, deep breath and feels her rib cage retract, her muscles in her jaw and shoulders don't feel as tight, and the nervous coil in her stomach turns to butterflies when she sees Lincoln smiling at her.
"Lucy," Lincoln says, her tone changing more serious again, "thank you."
"For what?"
"For being a real friend. For like, showing me what that even is."
"Yeah, right back at you."
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