DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. All I see is gray, blank, empty nothingness. My home is the three chapters in new moon that are just months. I also have nothing to say about this chapter, other than to thank NeedMoreZzz's for her impeccable usage of commas and to once again reiterate that I owe my first-born child to all of you who have read/wept/commented/reviewed/favorited, etc.
XXXVI
The next morning, the sun rose up in a great burst of blood-red, with orange rays slanting in rows over the small, pink clouds that went scuttling too quickly across the sky. The wind surged forward and rocked the treetops until the whole forest looked as if it was going to shake apart.
It ends tomorrow, someone thought. It might have been me, but my sleep-deprived brain was too slow to catch whether or not the words were coming out of mine or one of the packs' minds.
I think it was you, Quil groaned, flopping onto his side.
You have the biggest mouth, I argued. I think it was you.
Something stirred in my stomach – hunger. Or anticipation. Maybe both.
It was all set up. Billy had borrowed Old Quil's boat and invited Charlie to the rez for some open sea fishing before the Mariners went up against the Nationals that afternoon. Collin and Brady, protesting the entire time, were grudgingly holding down the fort. Sam had snuck off to say goodbye to Emily, so Jared and I raced to catch up with him while Paul and Quil howled in laughter.
Where's the fire? Embry hooted.
Stick your tongue down Kim's throat for me, Jared.
Hey, what did she mean by 'swirly thing,' last night?
Oh! Sick, Seth thought, half in awe and half in confusion, as an image of Kim in a precarious position filled all our heads.
Nice, Embry appraised.
Could any of you be quiet, for like, two minutes? Leah grumbled from where she was still curled up underneath a tree behind Emily's house. It's like a non-stop family road trip.
You're one to talk, I scoffed.
She winced, her limbs still heavy with sleep. That terrible, empty, molded-rib cage feeling had replaced the fury, mighty and insidious. I focused on where I was headed, feeling like time was moving too fast and I was spending it poorly.
Emily's house was still shrouded in darkness, shielded from the rising blood-red sun by the tall cedar trees of the forest. The curtains and windows were all shut, and in the shadows, the little ranch seemed to be sleeping along with its occupants.
Leah got up smoothly from her spot, and in an instant she had bolted into the forest, avoiding Sam as much as possible.
Each was cautiously aware of the other. Sam was wracked with guilt and wanted to beg at her feet for forgiveness, but Leah was so embarrassed she didn't want to face any of us. Leah had to focus on his genuine feelings of remorse and breathe deeply through her nose when angry tears pricked at her eyes.
We were all eager to get inside, but I was the fastest, so I raced through Emily's front door first, pulling up my shorts as I ran. Sam was a foot behind me, and Jared was struggling to jam a leg into his sweatpants.
My eyes focused on Bella immediately and unconsciously, and then the rest of the room was utterly uninteresting and bland in comparison. She was curled up on the couch, eyes shut lightly. Emily and Kim shared the bed upstairs.
I let Sam and Jared race up the creaky staircase without a glance.
This was a better sight.
Bella hadn't been without the crease between her eyebrows for a week, but her face was smooth now, softened around the edges, all the worry washed away with sleep. Carefully, so as not to wake her up, I slid myself onto the couch with her. She stirred, laying her head on my shoulder, but her breathing remained paced and slow.
Jared bounded down the stairs with a groggy Kim in his arms.
"You wanna clear out, Jake," he warned, nodding towards the door.
"Sure, sure," I answered distractedly.
Jared was already gone.
I rested my hand on her hair, running my fingers through the strands and following them down to their pointy ends, brushing against the small of her back.
She shivered, and moved again so she was on her side, one arm curled up on my torso.
I wrapped my arms around her waist and brushed my lips against her widow's peak.
"Jake," she murmured.
"Bells?"
She stirred again, this time raising her chin, then settled it back down against my collarbone with a sigh.
"Jacob," she breathed. "My Jacob."
"Bella, honey? Are you awake?" I laughed, though my heart thudded loudly.
She started, then settled quickly back into my arms.
"No," she grumbled.
I chuckled, my own throat still thick with sleep. "We oughta get out of here before Sam throws us out," I said, grabbing her wrist and pulling it up to my neck.
"Sam?" Bella, confused, raised her head to look up at me before realization dawned on her face, as bright red as the sun as it poked through the trees and slanted in through the window to light up the back of the couch.
I took hold of her knees and brought them across my lap, sitting us up swiftly.
"We can go back to Billy's place, Charlie's probably picked him up by now," I offered, standing up with her in my arms.
"Oh, let me walk," she insisted, wiggling her legs out and landing on the ground clumsily. "You're going to be carrying me enough today," she said, leaning on my arm to catch her balance.
"Okay," I laughed, supporting most of her weight on our way out the door.
Bella was stubborn as a mule, but I didn't mind half-carrying her back to Billy's, because it was the first extended amount of human time I had spent with her in what felt like forever. She woke up more thoroughly when we were out in the windy day, but her hands still clutched at me feverishly, like she was trying to prevent me from ever leaving her arms again. I walked with my arm hanging off her shoulders, eyes scanning the path ahead and then getting drawn back to her like moths to a flame.
We took the short-cut through the woods, on a path that seemed a lot smaller when I was a wolf. As a human, it felt too wide, too ominous and imposing. The forest was so completely still I thought that time might have stopped.
"What did you do last night?" Bella wondered, squeezing my hand where it rested on her collarbone.
"Nothing, really," I replied.
"When do we have to go lay the trail?" She asked, letting her fingers drift up to the pulse on my wrist.
"Not sure. You got any bloodsuckers on speed dial?" I joked.
"I don't remember the house number," she murmured.
"Oh, wait," I said, reaching into the pocket of my black sweatpants. "The bloods – I mean, Edward" – I corrected when I saw her menacing glare – "gave me a post-it note the other night with his number on it. You can call when we get to Billy's and tell him we'll be ready in an hour or so, if you want." I shrugged. I didn't like this part of the plan. "They know where to meet us."
"Good idea," Bella hummed distractedly, eyes fixed on her feet as we maneuvered over the damp ground.
I tightened my arm around her. "What are you thinking about?"
"I'm not sure," she said, blinking. "I think I'll need some coffee to figure it out."
I laughed. The sound echoed off the trees and came back to us.
The sun started cutting through the mossy trunks of the trees bordering Billy's house, and I could smell benzene and oil wafting out of the garage. It was so familiar that I automatically relaxed my tense shoulders and my steps became less urgent. Bella was able to keep pace with me easily, but we stayed in a comfortable silence that reminded me of early mornings working on the Rabbit. Things seemed so much simpler then.
Billy was waiting for Charlie when we got there, sitting by the front door with his pole and his lunch on his lap in a metal pail. I flew halfway into the kitchen and then stopped so suddenly when I noticed him eyeing me warily that Bella slammed into my back with a piercing slap. I was hoping he would be gone so Bella and I could continue our conversation from the night before, and he must have recognized that in my face. The "swirly thing," kept reappearing every five minutes in my thoughts like a pop-up ad, reminding me how vitally important it was that I ask Bella about it later.
He looked away, holding up his hand.
"I don't want to know," he said.
I sighed in relief. "When's Charlie coming?"
"Should be around soon. Might want to bring Bella back to the garage," he grunted, pointedly looking at her with a knowing smile, then turning back to me.
My ears burned with embarrassment.
"She stayed the night at Emily's, but Sam came home to say goodbye, and he sort of kicked us out," I explained defensively.
"Sure, sure." Billy's grin was mocking. "I changed the sheets while you were out, by the way. And don't you worry about Charlie, Bella," Billy added, as my fist balled up on the small of Bella's back and my eyes popped wide open. "I've got my part of this under control."
"Yeah, I know Charlie'll be fine," Bella replied, glancing up at me anxiously.
"I wish I could be with the rest of you tomorrow." Billy chuckled regretfully. "Being an old man is a hardship, kids."
Bella rolled her eyes. "The urge to fight must be a defining characteristic of the Y chromosome," she huffed, elbowing me in the kidney.
I laughed, and Billy grinned.
"Have fun with Charlie," I hinted when Chief Swan's tires came sloshing down the road, dragging Bella towards the hallway, where we could hide in my room.
"Good luck, you two," he answered, his grave eyes lingering on mine.
For a moment, the sunlight streamed in, lighting up Billy's black eyes with saffron flickers of flame. He looked so much younger at that moment I almost didn't recognize him. It was a glimpse of the man my mother had loved, and the father my sisters remembered, whom I had never known. A newfound respect for him bloomed in my chest. With a solemn nod, I pulled Bella into my room and closed the door quietly behind us.
The cruiser pulled onto the lawn just as I managed to pull the curtain. Bella and I hid under the covers, giggling like kids, while the two old friends greeted each other at the door.
"Hey, Billy!"
"How's it going, Charlie?"
"Alright, alright. How's Jake?"
I was distracted by how close Bella was, and how electric it felt where our skin touched, and the feather-light brush of her lips on my neck, and trying to keep quiet about it so Billy wouldn't know.
"Who knows?" He chuckled, his wheels squeaking. "You see him more than I do. Can't seem to tear those two apart."
"I hope they know what they're doing," Charlie grunted. "She's not as flighty as her mother, I don't think, but she wasn't right after the Cullens left."
They were outside now, and Charlie helped Billy into the front seat of the cruiser, then folded up his wheelchair and put it in the backseat.
"They'll work it out," Billy said confidently. "I think all that's left is to decide which one of us is going to be Grandpa, and which is going to be cool Grandpa."
Charlie laughed, and then the cruiser's engine ignited.
"I'm hip with the kids," Charlie said.
The cruiser puttered away, and I repositioned myself over Bella with a sharp squeal of the bed springs. She ran her fingers up my neck, twisting the hair on the back of my scalp so it hung around us like a jet-black waterfall.
"They're gone now," I told her.
She ran kisses up the length of my jaw. "How long do we have?" She whispered, her breath brushing against my ear.
"Not long enough," I sighed, falling onto her side, cupping the side of her face with my palm. "No length of time with you will ever be enough."
She reached out and rested her hand just underneath my jaw, fingers running through my hair.
"If you die tomorrow –"
"I'm not going to die, Bella."
"But you could," she said pointedly, then paused, frozen for half a second. Her eyes went completely blank. She shook her head as if to clear it. "No. I can't do that. I won't live if you die."
"That's ridiculous, Bella." My voice shot up three octaves.
Bella flinched.
"You've got to be joking," I laughed nervously. "Think about Charlie. Think about me. I'll be one pissed-off ghost if you off yourself."
"What would you do if I died?"
"That's different," I argued.
"Not really," she retorted. "Didn't you say that once? 'If you die, I die.' I remember because you were so serious." She shook her head again. "I couldn't doubt you."
My tongue got tied up in knots when I looked down at her. Her eyebrows were raised, waiting for my rebuttal, no doubt running down a list of talking points she had compiled before bringing the subject up.
"If you die today," she continued, "I want you to know that I love you. More than I love Edward, or Alice, or any of the Cullens." She pushed a strand of hair out of my eyes. "No matter what happens, you should know that."
"Bells, I…" I trailed off, wondering if I should tell her that I knew about her conversation with Leah.
"You don't have to say anything," she whispered, looking down at the pillow. "I just wanted to tell you, in case I don't get the chance again."
"I love you, too," I responded immediately, shaking my head to clear it, then laughed. "But I think I've made myself clear on that."
She smiled half-heartedly, twirling a chunk of my hair in her finger.
"And I'm not going to die," I promised, rolling my eyes.
"Well –" Bella broke off, a colossal yawn rippling through her body.
"Let's get some coffee, huh?" I chuckled, pulling back the covers.
She didn't speak until three sips into her mug, when she looked up at me with wide, frightened eyes.
"I should call them and find out when we need to be there to set the trail," she whispered.
I followed Bella to the phone on the kitchen wall, where she poked numbers into the ancient phone, twirling the cord in her hand. I walked up behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist, resting my chin on her shoulder and wondering if it would be good for my back to sleep this hunched over.
"I wonder who will answer," she mumbled to herself.
I pressed my lips to the skin behind her ear as she held up the phone and waited.
It only rang once.
"Hello?" Sang a smooth, high voice.
"Alice," Bella sighed in relief. "It's me, Bella. I'm calling to see when we should be there to lay the trail."
"I know it's you, Bella. I would see if anyone else was trying to call me," the leech said, annoyed.
"Sorry," Bella apologized. "But can you let Edward know?"
I kissed her neck, then moved up to her jaw, trying to distract her from the phone and pull her back into my room, where we could forget about bloodsucker armies.
"I think," the leech said indignantly, as if she was too smart for thinking – she was used to knowing. "That you're going to want to pack for cold weather. I can't see where you are exactly because you're taking off with that dog this afternoon. But the storm that's coming seems particularly bad in that general area."
"What should I bring?" Bella asked, picking up a pen and notepad from the counter.
"Don't worry, Edward is overpreparing, as usual. He's packed enough gear to get you through a week up there, let alone one night. But it's going to snow on the mountains," she warned.
"Ew, snow," Bella muttered.
"Wear a jacket. And tell Jake to hurry up – you'd better get going. You've got to set a trap and make camp before the storm comes." I could hear the frown in her voice. "Don't forget your coat, Bella. It seems… unseasonably cold."
"Okay," Bella replied.
"Have a nice night," Alice said in farewell.
I had to agree with the psychic leech – the weather was gearing up to do something big, even on the rez. It was strangely sunny and warm, the air so still and thick it hung like condensation on the side of an ice-cold glass of water.
Bella tapped the padding of the thick parka I grabbed from the hall closet.
"I thought you didn't get cold anymore."
"I don't," I replied, grinning. "I'm bringing this for you since you're not prepared."
She rolled her eyes and took the jacket.
Bella rode on my back, only losing her balance twice. Her hands still gripped my hair, but there was a lot less tugging, which was sort of disappointing.
This is weird, Quil complained. You can't just let your girlfriend ride you while we can hear your thoughts. There's gotta be a law about that.
It's Bella's thing, man, Embry snickered. She gets turned on by riding monsters.
Shut up, I growled.
They did not.
I took a long detour, making sure her scent would be nowhere near the trail we'd hide later. When we arrived at the clearing, it seemed like an odd place for a battle. The sun broke through the clouds above to light a halo of buttery gold atop the tall, thick blanket of purple bellflowers, with long dandelion stems poking through and leaning over to the side, weighed down by their heavy yellow petals. The mind-reader met us there, his skin refracting sharply against the bright sky, with a giant backpack. It was so large I wondered if he had broken into Newton's boarded-up store and thrown the entirety of their remaining inventory over his shoulder.
"Hello, Jacob."
I growled in response.
"Bella," Edward nodded, eyes sliding up from mine to hers.
She swung her leg over my head and hopped onto the ground, catching her balance on my shoulder when she landed uncertainly in the sopping wet grass.
Edward took a step forward.
Hold it right there, bloodsucker, I growled.
Edward stopped but smiled ruefully at Bella.
"We're going to need you to walk north for a ways, touching as much as you can. Alice gave me a clear picture of their path, and it won't take long for us to intersect it. I'll go along with you, and let you know when to turn around."
"North?" Bella wondered.
He smiled and pointed out the right direction.
Bella wandered into the woods, leaving the clear yellow light of the clearing behind. I pulled my teeth back, snarling, as the leech smiled smugly and went to join her.
I stayed about thirty yards away, keeping tabs on the bloodsucker. He walked in a parallel line to Bella, about twenty more yards away. Bella walked slowly, trailing her fingers over anything in arm's reach; rough tree bark, wet ferns, moss-covered rocks.
"Am I doing this right?" Bella called over to him.
"Perfectly," the leech purred.
Bella's face lit up like switching on a lightbulb.
"Will this help?" She asked, running her fingers through her hair and catching a few loose strands, then with a swish of her hand, she draped them over the ferns.
Tell her she doesn't have to do that, I thought, trying to make it louder in my head so the leech would hear me. I thought I saw him throw me an exasperated glance, but he moved so quick it was hard to tell.
"Yes, that does make the trail stronger," the bloodsucker replied. "But you don't need to pull your hair out, Bella. It will be fine."
"I've got a few extras I can spare," she replied breezily, wedging another hair into a broken branch that cut through her path.
It took a while for her to reach the spot where the newborn army would be certain to cross the trail, but Edward didn't seem to be impatient with her pace. He had to lead a bit more on the way back, to keep her on the same path. He only went a couple feet closer, but it made the fur on the back of my neck stand up.
We were almost to the clearing when she fell.
The wide opening was just ahead, and my paws were padding harder against the murky ground to catch up with the light. Bella must have gotten too eager and forgot to watch her feet. She managed to catch herself before her head bashed into the nearest tree, but a small branch snapped off under her left hand and gouged into her palm.
"Ouch! Oh, fabulous," she muttered.
"Are you all right?" The leech called.
I was already running, trying to focus hard enough to shift back to a form with opposable thumbs, but the bloodsucker was rapidly approaching, too.
I've got her, I insisted with a whine, I'M her boyfriend.
He reached Bella first, leaning down next to her before she could finish her next sentence.
"I'm fine. Stay where you are. I'm bleeding. It will stop in a minute."
"I've got a first aid kit," he said, pulling off the comically large backpack as if it were only a cloth tied to the end of a stick. "I had a feeling I might need it."
I sulked out of sight. He had probably come prepared for this – maybe even hoped for it. An excuse to get close, to turn his "smoldering" eyes on her and set another spell. I growled from the underbrush, cursing him out loudly in my head.
"It's not bad. I can take care of it – you don't have to make yourself uncomfortable," Bella gasped, still seeming startled by how suddenly he had come beside her.
"I'm not uncomfortable," he said calmly. "Here – let me clean it."
"Wait a second, I just got another idea."
Looking slightly green, without looking at the blood, and breathing through her mouth queasily, she pressed her shaky palm against a rock within her reach.
"What are you doing?"
"Jasper will love this," Bella muttered to herself.
She started for the clearing again, pressing her palm against everything in her path.
"I'll bet this really gets them going."
For a brief second, an image of wild animals – no, not animals, leeches – catching the scent and flying ravenously down the trail flickered before my eyes. My muscles tensed uncomfortably, and Edward flinched, then sighed.
"Hold your breath," she instructed, side-stepping away from him.
"I'm fine," he replied evenly. "I just think you're going overboard."
"This is all I get to do. I want to do a good job."
They broke through the last of the trees as she spoke. She let her injured hand graze across the ferns. I watched from behind the curtain of the trees, wondering if I would be able to shift back with a leech standing so close to the love of my life.
"Well, you have," Edward assured her. "The newborns will be frantic, and Jasper will be very impressed with your dedication. Now let me treat your hand – you've gotten the cut dirty."
"Let me do it, please," Bella insisted.
Edward didn't listen to her. With a flash of movement, he took her hand and smiled as he examined it.
"This doesn't bother me anymore," he murmured in a silky voice.
She watched him carefully as he cleaned the gash, her eyes searching his face as if trying to find meaning in a long passage of prose. Edward continued to breathe evenly in and out, the same small, smug smile on his lips.
One wrong move and I'll snap your wrist off, bloodsucker, I snarled.
I was screaming death threats in my head. Luckily, none of the other pack was there to hear my tirade. I wanted it reserved for Edward's ears only; only he should have had to feel how bitterly I hated him. He must have, because he kept glancing over to me as if to tell me to cool it, which only made me more angry. If I hadn't already been a wolf, I would have shifted.
"Why not?" She finally asked, breathless, as he smoothed a bandage across her palm.
He shrugged. "I got over it."
"You…" She trailed off, shaking her head in disbelief. "Got over it? When? How?" Her eyes glazed over, searching her memories for something, but I couldn't tell what it was she was looking for in his smile.
Why was she staring at him so intently? It was unsettling how focused she was on his face, hanging on his every movement like he held the world in his hands.
Edward pursed his lips, seeming to search for the words. "I've had to live without you for a long time, Bella. That changed the way I look at a lot of things."
With a pang of remorse, I remembered the way she had looked when Sam found her in the woods that fateful night. Edward closed his eyes and looked down at the ground, a low groan escaping from between his lips, too quiet for Bella's ears to pick up.
"Did it change the way I smell to you?" She asked, an almost mournful edge to her voice.
"Not at all. But… having experienced the way it feels to lose you… my reactions have changed. My entire being shies away from any course that could inspire that kind of pain again."
Bella stared at him with wide, shocked eyes. He smiled at her expression.
"I guess you could call it a very educational experience."
Break it up, I growled. You bandaged her hand. Time to go.
The wind tore through the clearing then, lashing her hair around her face and making her shiver like a leaf hanging off the thin stem of a branch.
"All right," Edward said, reaching into his pack again. "You've done your part. Now it's out of our hands. Time to go camping!"
Bella laughed nervously at the mock enthusiasm in his voice.
"Where are we meeting Jake?" She asked.
"Right here." He gestured to the trees in front of them just as I stepped warily from their shadows.
She looked surprised to see me human, as if she had been expecting the same red-brown wolf who had carried her to the clearing. I had my arms folded across my bare chest, my face carefully expressionless as I watched them.
Edward's lips pulled down at the corners. "There had to have been a better way to do this." He sighed, speaking my thoughts aloud.
"Hey, Jake," Bella greeted as I got closer, picking up her pace.
Bella embraced me and handed the thicker jacket to Edward, who took it back with a scowl.
"Hello, Jacob," Edward said.
I ignored the pleasantries, all business. "Where do I take her?" I asked, though I had a pretty good guess.
Edward pulled a map from a side pocket on the pack and offered it to me. I unfolded it.
"We're here now," Edward said, reaching over to touch the right spot. I recoiled from his hand automatically and then steadied myself. Edward pretended not to notice. "And you're taking her up here," Edward continued, tracing a serpentine pattern around the elevation lines on the paper. "Roughly nine miles."
I nodded once.
"When you're about a mile away, you should cross my path. That will lead you in. Do you need the map?"
"No, thanks. I know this area pretty well. I think I know where I'm going." My tone was polite, though strained. It took some effort.
"I'll take a longer route," Edward said. "And I'll see you in a few hours." He smirked over at me, then glanced forlornly at Bella. He didn't like this part of the plan.
"See you," Bella murmured, tightening her hand around mine.
Edward faded into the trees, heading in the opposite direction. As soon as he was gone, my mood lifted.
"What's up, Bella?" I asked with a big grin.
She rolled her eyes. "Same old, same old."
"Yeah," I agreed. "Bunch of vampires trying to kill you. The usual."
"The usual."
"Well," I said, zipping up the jacket I'd given her. "Let's get going."
Making a face, she took a step closer. I bent down and swept my arm behind her knees, knocking them out from under her. My other arm caught her just before her head hit the ground.
"Jerk," she muttered.
I chuckled, already running through the trees. I kept a steady rhythm, a brisk jog at a human pace.
"You don't have to run," Bella insisted. "You'll get tired."
"Running doesn't make me tired," I said evenly. "Besides, it will be colder soon. I hope he gets the camp set up before we get there."
She tapped her finger against the thick padding of the parka I brought her. "Thanks, by the way. How did you know I would need this?"
"I don't like the way the weather feels. It's making me edgy. Notice how we haven't seen any animals?"
"Um, not really."
"I guess you wouldn't. Your senses are too dull."
Bella rolled her eyes. "Alice was worried about the storm, too."
"It takes a lot to silence the forest this way. You picked a hell of a night for a camping trip."
"It wasn't entirely my idea."
The pathless way to the campsite began to climb more and more steeply, but I didn't slow down. I leaped easily from rock to rock, not needing my hands to keep my balance. Bella laughed and called me a mountain goat.
"Jake?"
"Yeah?"
"Can I ask a hypothetical question?"
"Shoot."
"Well…" She trailed off, picking at her fingernails. "You said this would be easy. Really easy. And, if it really is, then someone could… hypothetically… sit out, right?"
My eyes narrowed. "Hypothetically… yes. That's why Brady and Collin are guarding La Push, and Seth is on cell-phone duty. What are you getting at?"
Bella pursed her lips, glancing up at me shyly and then quickly looking back down at her hands.
"Spit it out, Bells."
She sighed. "What if I asked you to sit out?"
My pace slowed for a moment, but I quickly recovered from the shock.
"Hypothetically?"
"Of course."
"I would say no."
She nodded, biting her lower lip, refusing to look up at me.
"Everything's going to go off without a hitch," I promised. "Even if you'd asked and I'd said no, you wouldn't be mad at me afterwards."
"If everything does go off without a hitch, you're probably right. I won't be mad. But the whole time you're gone, I'll be sick with worry, Jake. Crazy with it."
"Ye of little faith," I grumbled.
"Don't say that. You know how much you mean to me. You're my best friend. Even with this imprint thing, you've always been my Jacob. When you let your guard down." She grinned up at me.
I smiled the old smile I knew she loved. "I'm always that," I promised. "Even when I don't… behave as well as I should. Underneath, I'm always in here."
"I know. Why else would I put up with all your crap?"
We laughed together, and I enjoyed the moment.
I enjoyed the moment, until I wrinkled my nose, and she opened her mouth to say something else, but I changed the subject. "We're not far now, I can smell him."
She sighed.
"I'd happily slow down, Bella, but you're going to want to be under shelter before that hits."
I looked up pointedly at the sky, and she followed my gaze. A solid wall of purple-black clouds was racing in from the west, darkening the forest beneath as it came.
"Wow," she murmured, staring up at the sky in thinly veiled awe. "You'd better hurry, Jake. You'll want to get home before it gets here."
"I'm not going home."
She looked up at me, surprised. "You're camping with me and Seth?"
"No," I chuckled. "You think I'd let him have all the fun? He'll take over tomorrow, during the fight."
Bella was silent for a second. She stared at me, her face contorted with worry.
"I don't suppose there's any way you'd just stay since you're already here?" She suggested. "If I did beg? Or trade back the lifetime of servitude or something?"
"Tempting, but no. Then again, the begging might be interesting to see. You can give it a go if you like."
"There's really nothing, nothing at all I can say?"
For a second, her eyes flashed hungrily, and her fingers brushed my collarbone.
I gulped.
"Nope," I replied, trying to keep the joking tone in my voice. "Not unless you can promise me a better fight. Anyway, Sam's calling the shots, not me."
"Didn't you say something a while ago…" She trailed off, eyes unfocused. "About your grandfather, being the Alpha… Are you second in command of the pack, then?"
I blinked. I'd forgotten about telling her that.
"Oh. That."
"Are you?"
"Yeah, I guess."
"How come you never mentioned that?"
"Why would I? It's no big thing."
"I don't know. Why not? It's interesting. So, how does that work? How did Sam end up as the Alpha, and you as the… the Beta?"
I chuckled at her term. "Sam was the first, the oldest. It made sense for him to take charge."
Bella frowned, her eyebrows coming together in confusion. "But shouldn't Jared or Paul be second, then? They were the next to change."
"Well… it's hard to explain," I hedged.
"Try," she insisted.
I sighed. "It's more about the lineage, you know? Sort of old-fashioned. Why should it matter who your grandpa was, right?"
"Didn't you say that Ephraim Black was the last chief the Quileutes had?"
"Yeah, that's right. Because he was the Alpha. Did you know that, technically, Sam's the chief of the whole tribe now?" I laughed. "Crazy traditions."
She was still working on the idea, evidently trying to chew her bottom lip off. "But you also said that people listened to your dad more than anyone else on the council, because he was Ephraim's grandson?"
"What about it?"
"Well, if it's about the lineage… shouldn't you be the chief, then?"
I was silent, staring into the darkening forest and pretending to concentrate on where we were going.
"Jake?"
"No. That's Sam's job."
I kept my eyes on our pathless course.
"Why? His great-granddad was Levi Uley, right? Was Levi an Alpha, too?"
"There's only one Alpha," I answered automatically.
"So what was Levi?"
"Sort of a Beta, I guess." I snorted at her term. "Like me."
"That doesn't make sense."
"It doesn't matter."
"I just want to understand."
I met her confused eyes and then sighed.
"Yeah, I was supposed to be the Alpha," I admitted.
Her eyebrows pulled together. "Sam didn't want to step down?"
I scoffed. "Hardly. I didn't want to step up."
"Why not?"
I frowned, uncomfortable. "I didn't want any of it, Bella. I didn't want anything to change. I didn't want to be some legendary chief. I didn't want to be part of a pack of werewolves, let alone their leader. I wouldn't take it when Sam offered."
Bella was silent for another long moment. I didn't interrupt, staring ahead into the forest.
"But I thought you were happier. That you were okay with this," she finally whispered.
I smiled reassuringly, then leaned down and pressed my lips to her forehead.
"Yeah," I said as I pulled away, enjoying the flush of red in her cheeks. "It's really not so bad. Exciting sometimes, like with this thing tomorrow. But at first, it sort of felt like being drafted into a war you didn't know existed. There was no choice, you know? And it was so final." I shrugged. "Anyway, I guess I'm glad now. It has to be done, and could I trust someone else to get it right? It's better to make sure myself."
She stared at me, her face a mixture of surprise and awe.
"Chief Jacob," she whispered, resting her head against my collarbone. I felt her cheeks go up in a smile.
I rolled my eyes.
On the down-low; hearing her say the words sent a flutter of butterflies in my stomach.
Just then, a glacial wind shook the trees around us more fiercely than before. The sharp sound of wood cracking echoed off the mountain. The light was vanishing as the grisly cloud covered the sky, and little white specks of snow began to flutter past us. I picked up the pace, keeping my eyes on the ground now as I flat-out sprinted. Bella curled into my chest, recoiling from the cold.
Five minutes later, I dashed around to the left side of the stony peak and saw a little tent nestled up against the sheltering face. More flurries were falling around us, but the wind was too fierce to let them settle anywhere.
"Bella!" Edward called out, his voice saturated in relief.
We'd caught him in the middle of pacing back and forth across the little open space. He flashed to our side, a swift blur that appeared in front of us within the blink of an eye. I cringed, then set Bella on her feet, steadying her as the wind threatened to knock her backwards.
"I need to get her inside. This is going to be bad – my hair's standing up on my scalp. Is that tent secure?"
"I all but welded it to the rock," Edward replied, sounding sincere.
"Good."
I looked up at the sky, now black with the storm, sprinkled with swirling bits of snow. My nostrils flared.
"Bella," I grabbed her hand to get her attention. "I'm going to change, I want to know what's going on back home." I turned my head to glare at Edward. "Are you staying, then?"
"I'd like to keep in touch with the pack, for coordination purposes. If you'd be gracious enough to perform such a service, that is."
I scowled, then looked back to Bella, and my face softened. "Are you okay if I leave for a minute?"
"Of course," she assured me. "Do what you need to do. I'll be waiting here."
I leaned down to press my lips against hers quickly, then hung my jacket on a low, stubby branch, and walked into the murky forest without a backward glance.
A/N: My NCLEX exam is scheduled for June 5th at 10:30 AM, so if you're not busy at that time and happen to remember, send some good vibes, if you can :)